Vault: How Much Are You Supposed To Spend On A First Date?

Summary

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The Bert Show: Vault – “How Much Are You Supposed To Spend On A First Date?”

Date: January 9, 2026
Podcast: The Bert Show (Pionaire Podcasting)
Summary by Section, Quotes, and Timestamps

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Episode Overview

This lively episode dives into the big question:
How much is it “normal” to spend on a first date these days?
Host Birch and co-hosts Bert, Emily, and Phil engage a range of callers to share what they spent recently on dates, compare costs, and discuss the “hidden expenses” and expectations around modern dating. The crew backs up their real-life anecdotes with data from a new national survey, prompting plenty of laughs and a dose of sticker shock.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. How Much Did YOU Spend on a Date? (01:32–05:56)

• Host Birch opens the show by questioning the rising cost of first dates, referencing a new (surprising) survey. He notes he hasn't dated in 11 years, so the numbers seemed unreal to him.

• The hosts take rapid-fire calls from listeners confessing their weekend date expenses:

  • Michael spent $25 ("Probably no more than about 25." – Michael, 02:24), splitting costs with a partner.
  • Andrew spent $74 on dinner only—and notes he’s paid more before, but felt this one was “well worth it.” (02:47–03:14)
  • Kyle scored Six Flags tickets and dinner for $33: "Money well spent." (04:13–04:33)
  • Rod did dinner and a movie for $45, calling this amount “lower than average” for him. Usually, dates run “from like 55 to maybe 60.” (04:42–05:10)
  • Greg drops the bomb: $350 on one date, plus another $175 in grooming and an outfit (manicure, pedicure, haircut, clothes). (“The grand total was roughly 525.” – Greg, 06:18)

2. The “Hidden Costs” and Pressure to Impress (03:39–06:34)

• Hosts and callers highlight extra, less obvious expenses: new clothes, salon visits, and even car detailing to impress a date.
• Greg shares his total—over $500 for one date, because he likes “to look good 24/7.” His girlfriend, Tanya, chimes in: “I’m worth it.” (07:32)

3. The Real World Cost: Are We Spending Too Much? (08:05–13:09)

• Co-host Phil admits his dates easily run $200 due to little extras: “You add in another 75 to bail us out of jail at the end of night...” (08:36)
• The price of drinks draws the most ire.
  • Birch: “Why does a drink in Atlanta cost the same as in New York City?” (08:56)
  • Phil: “Our dinners alone are 125 bucks. Then it’s the little stuff... cover to get into a club... even the bathroom valet!” (08:10)
• A bar manager calls in and claims alcoholic drinks have a 30%–80% markup (11:50). But another former bar owner from California insists the real average markup on top-shelf alcohol is 300% (13:09).

4. The National Survey Results: Jaw-On-Floor Numbers (09:29–10:33)

• National survey average for a date: $300.
• Host Birch: “[T]he average that most people are spending on a date now is $300.” (09:29)
• Women, on average, spend $295 before going out on clothes, hair, nails, etc.
• Men spend an average of $310 on the actual date (10:26–10:31).
• Emily: “310! That’s expensive.” (10:31)

5. Dating Budgets, Expectations, and Social Pressures (10:36–11:41)

• Bert: “The pressure on impressing somebody... includes valet, tip, alcohol... then to go to a nice restaurant, you have to dress really nice...” (10:36)
• The group jokes about keeping cars clean for early dates and letting the “real” mess show later.

6. Alcohol Markups, Negotiations & Bar Stories (11:50–14:31)

• William (bar manager): Drinks typically have a 30% markup, but some places push 80% (11:50–12:19).
• Jenna (ex-bar owner): “The average markup for top shelf is 300%.” (13:09)
• The cast wishes everything was negotiable at bars and laughs about bartenders improvising prices and the need to impress not just your date, but their friends too.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Birch (01:32):

  “If things have changed this much, y' all need a raise for sure.”

• Michael (02:24):

  “No, to go to the movie. $15. And then, you know, popcorn, icy Coke. Probably no more than about 25.”

• Co-host Bert (03:27):

  “You’re trying to be cool in front of your date. Like—yeah, I know what to do... and then bring out the tip card.”

• Greg (06:18):

  “The grand total was roughly 525.”

• Tanya (07:32):

  “I’m worth it.”

• Host Birch (09:29):

  “According to this survey, I feel bad if you are single because the average that most people are spending on a date now is $300.”

• Co-host Emily (10:31):

  “Man, 310. That’s expensive.”

• Host Birch (08:56):

  “I’ll never understand in Atlanta—why a drink... costs you the same as in New York City.”

• William (11:53):

  “It’s a general 30% markup.”

• Jenna (13:09):

  “The average markup for top shelf is 300%.”

• Co-host Phil (08:36):

  “Probably one date is about 200 bucks. But then you got to add in about another 75 to bail us out of jail at the end of the night...”

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 01:32: Opening Question—How much did YOU spend on a date?
• 02:08–05:56: Listeners share their real-life dating expenses.
• 05:22–06:34: Greg’s $525 date (with guest Tanya’s reaction).
• 08:05–09:16: The impact of drinks, tips, and little “hidden costs.”
• 09:29–10:33: Survey reveals national date spending averages.
• 11:50–12:19: Bar managers explain drink markups.
• 13:09: Industry insight—a 300% alcohol markup.
• 14:08–14:31: Social pressure to impress dates and their friends.

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Show Tone and Style

Light-hearted, authentic, and peppered with laughter, the episode leans into the jaw-dropping nature of modern dating costs while still keeping it relatable and fun. Listeners and hosts alike are both aghast and amused by just how expensive love seems to have become.

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For New Listeners:
If you’re wondering what’s “normal” to spend on a first date—or just want to laugh at other people’s receipts—this episode offers real numbers, real stories, and a hilarious view into today’s dating pressures.

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Transcript

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[Host Birch]

The Birch show the question I have for y' all is if you went out on a date this weekend and you paid for that date, how much did you spend? Because I saw a survey this weekend and I looked at this number and I thought this. This absolutely can't be right. Things, they couldn't have changed that much since I've been dating. Now granted, I. I've been married eight years and I've known Stacy for 11, so I probably haven't gone out on a date in 11 years. But if things have changed this much, y' all need a raise for sure. Good morning. Is it Michael?

[Caller/Guest]

Yes, it's Michael.

[Host Birch]

How are you this morning?

[Caller/Guest]

I'm fine. And you?

[Host Birch]

Doing okay. How much did you pay for your date this weekend?

[Caller/Guest]

You Know what? I think the movie was? $15. And then I paid for the snacks, and then he paid for lunch, so nothing exorbitant.

[Host Birch]

So when all is said and done, what are we looking at? 50 bucks.

[Caller/Guest]

50? No, to go to the movie. $15. And then, you know, popcorn, icy Coke. Probably no more than about 25.

[Host Birch]

$25. All right.

[Co-host Emily]

Okay.

[Host Birch]

Falling in love. Priceless.

[Co-host Bert]

I'll pay anything just to spend that special time with you.

[Host Birch]

Andrew.

[Caller/Guest]

Yes.

[Host Birch]

Hello, sir. How are you this morning?

[Caller/Guest]

Pretty good. How about you?

[Host Birch]

What'd you roll out this weekend, man?

[Caller/Guest]

$74.

[Co-host Bert]

And what did that. What was that for? Just dinner or.

[Caller/Guest]

That was just dinner. Yeah, but I will say that. That. That's really not even that high compared.

[Co-host Bert]

To what you spent before.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, I mean, I've spent a lot more in the past, but it was well worth it. It was a. It was a good second date.

[Host Birch]

A good second date. And, you know, it was $74 because you just remember that number off the top of your head.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, that. Well, yeah. And I. I remember what I ended up tipping. Tipping out 100.

[Host Birch]

That's doing the math. At the end of the. At the end of the day, that's always tough, right? 74, 27, 14, 15. I can't figure it out, but you're.

[Co-host Bert]

Trying to be cool in front of your date. Like. Yeah, I know what to do. And I'm thinking, you know, you put your tip card out of your wallet just real quick.

[Co-host Emily]

If you start counting on your fingers, you know you've had too much to drink.

[Co-host Bert]

Right? Right.

[Host Birch]

The height of dorky right there is if you bring out the tip card.

[Co-host Phil]

Yeah.

[Host Birch]

Now, Andrew, there are some hidden costs in this survey that I read this morning.

[Caller/Guest]

Mm.

[Host Birch]

Did you go out and did you get, like, clothes or did you get a haircut or anything before your date?

[Caller/Guest]

No.

[Co-host Bert]

Okay.

[Host Birch]

Maybe more of a girl thing than it is a guy thing to do something like that.

[Co-host Emily]

That's definitely a girl thing because you want to feel confident. And a lot of times we, like, feel better when we have on a brand new outfit. We got our hair done, we got, you know, cool piece of jewelry on or whatever. It's like. Okay. You know, it's like superficial confidence.

[Host Birch]

Kyle, Good morning.

[Caller/Guest]

Good morning. How you doing?

[Host Birch]

Good, man. Where'd you go? What'd you do? And how much did you spend?

[Caller/Guest]

Well, it spent like $33. I got a. I got a deal on a ticket to Six Flags and then just out to dinner afterwards, so it was like 23 bucks for the Six Flags. And like around $10 for dinner.

[Host Birch]

Okay, 33 bucks. Was it money well spent?

[Caller/Guest]

Very much well spent.

[Host Birch]

Okay, thank you and good morning, Rod. You're on all the hits Q100 high.

[Caller/Guest]

Hey, how you doing?

[Host Birch]

All right, man. How much did you spend this weekend?

[Caller/Guest]

I spent about 40, $45.

[Co-host Bert]

And that's a meal. Was that a meal?

[Caller/Guest]

It was a meal. And we also went to the movies last week.

[Host Birch]

Okay, 45 bucks.

[Co-host Emily]

Yeah.

[Host Birch]

And is that on average what you normally spend on a date?

[Caller/Guest]

Actually, that is kind of lower than the average. Average is anywhere from like 55 to maybe 60. Just depends on where we go because we normally go to a little, you know, higher class restaurants.

[Host Birch]

That sounds about right to me. Yeah, 55 or 60 sounds like it should be about right. Hey, Greg. You're on all the hits Q100.

[Co-host Emily]

Hi.

[Caller/Guest]

Hey, Bert.

[Host Birch]

How you doing? Excellent, man. How are you?

[Caller/Guest]

I'm doing all right.

[Host Birch]

How much did you spend this weekend?

[Caller/Guest]

I spent 350.

[Host Birch]

350.

[Co-host Emily]

Really?

[Co-host Bert]

What was it all for?

[Caller/Guest]

Okay, we went to Justin. Okay. And then we went to Justin's. And then after Justin's, we went to Houstons.

[Co-host Emily]

Okay.

[Caller/Guest]

And we spent drinks. Really? That's. That's where, like, the cost came in there. But I want to get back to what you were saying about people getting a haircut and all that. I wouldn't have got my haircut manicured and pedicure and bought a new outfit because I like to look good. 24, 7.

[Co-host Emily]

You go.

[Host Birch]

Blast, man. Plus, this girl must have been smoking, so.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, she was. I mean, I mean, I even had no girl look better than me. I'm sorry, I can't do it.

[Co-host Emily]

I need you to somehow convince my husband to get a manicure and a pedicure, by the way, and still be manly about it, because he refuses to do so. I think it's much more manly when you take care of your looks. So I. I commend you for that. But I want to know what was the grand total? If you include the haircut, manicure, pedicure, outfit, plus the 350, what'd you spend on your date?

[Caller/Guest]

The grand total was roughly 525.

[Host Birch]

$500?

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah. Because, I mean, I spent. I. I spent like $60 on my manicure and pedicure alone.

[Host Birch]

It must have been worth it because she's sitting right next to you.

[Caller/Guest]

Exactly. You can't believe. On Mother Burt show want to talk to you. Just, Just. Just talk to her for a second, Bert.

[Host Birch]

Sure.

[Co-host Phil]

This is free. Hi.

[Host Birch]

Hi. How are you?

[Co-host Emily]

Now Are you.

[Caller/Guest]

Oh, my God.

[Co-host Bert]

Now, are you screaming because of us or because the $525.

[Caller/Guest]

No, because of you guys. Oh, my God. I think this is the part.

[Co-host Emily]

Oh, my God.

[Caller/Guest]

I listen to you every morning. Thank you.

[Co-host Emily]

I think this is the part that impressed her the most. And this is a free phone call. I know, right?

[Host Birch]

We're going to charge him 500 bucks.

[Co-host Bert]

I need to know where you are so that every time I walk in someplace, somebody's like, oh, my God.

[Host Birch]

What's your name?

[Caller/Guest]

I'm Tanya.

[Co-host Bert]

Hey, Tanya.

[Host Birch]

Hey, Tonya. This guy that you're there with, he spent over $500 to impress you this weekend.

[Caller/Guest]

I'm worth it.

[Co-host Emily]

All right?

[Caller/Guest]

He doesn't have a problem with it.

[Host Birch]

Doesn't sound like it. Now, is this. This couldn't have been a first date.

[Caller/Guest]

No, he's my boyfriend.

[Host Birch]

All right. How long y' all been going out?

[Caller/Guest]

How long have we been going out, bae? It's been about six months. See, he remembers and I don't.

[Host Birch]

See you got a good one there. He's getting manicures, pedicures, and he still remembers your anniversary day. You're doing okay.

[Caller/Guest]

Oh, my God.

[Host Birch]

Thank you for calling, you guys.

[Co-host Emily]

Bye.

[Co-host Bert]

Alright, bye. Tanya.

[Host Birch]

Here's the reason why I ask y'.

[Caller/Guest]

All.

[Host Birch]

And Phil, how much are you spending when you're out with Mary Kane? She's got some pretty highfalutin tastes.

[Co-host Phil]

Well, yeah. And he hit the nail on the head when he said it's the drinks that'll get you. I mean. Cause our dinners alone are 125 bucks. And then it's the little stuff you don't think about, like having to pay to park or having to pay a cover to get into a club. And you know, that's 20 bucks here. That's tip here. I mean, even the little. You know, I don't. It's the biggest gyp in the world, but paying a dollar to go to.

[Host Birch]

The bathroom, like the bathroom valet ticks me off. Yeah, a dollar to hate to hand.

[Co-host Phil]

Already wet towel. Anyway, so I. I think on average, probably one date is about 200 bucks. But then you got to add in about another 75 to bail us out of jail at the end of the night. So it all depends. But I'd say on average, at least 200.

[Host Birch]

200 easily. Dang, that's a lot of money.

[Co-host Emily]

That's a big budget item. Like, you know, when you're setting out your finances for the month, if you're dating, you gotta set that aside.

[Host Birch]

I don't the drink thing. I'll never understand in Atlanta. Why a drink in Atlanta costs you the same amount that it does in New York City. Like, you can't get it like a good drink anymore for less than $10 in the city.

[Co-host Bert]

I think it's an image thing. Is the only thing I can think of somebody trying to keep up, you know, to be cosmopolitan, that means that we have to charge too much for alcohol.

[Host Birch]

I'd love to talk to somebody that owns a bar to find out how much it actually costs, cost to have the bottle in the bar and then how. What's the markup on that?

[Co-host Bert]

Yeah, clubs are the worst.

[Co-host Emily]

The worst clubs are the worst at marking up alcohol.

[Host Birch]

Okay. According to this survey, I feel bad if you are single because the average. The average that most people are spending on a date now is $300.

[Co-host Emily]

Ouch. Is this a national average? Like, this includes places like New York City.

[Host Birch]

This is a national average. So I guess New York and San Francisco and places like that, and maybe even ATL and LA raise that $300. But like I said, there are some hidden costs in there. When it comes to women. There are costs like getting your hair done and getting the clothes and all your beauty treatments and stuff. On average, a woman spends $295 before she goes out on that date. Does that sound accurate, y'?

[Co-host Emily]

All?

[Co-host Bert]

Because if you get nice clothes. Yeah. I mean, you're talking about hair. If you get your hair done professionally. But even if you don't, the clothes alone would cost that.

[Co-host Emily]

Yeah.

[Co-host Bert]

Impress somebody.

[Co-host Emily]

Yeah.

[Host Birch]

295. Yeah. And dudes are spending $310 on average on a date.

[Co-host Emily]

Man, 310. That's expensive.

[Co-host Bert]

Yeah, it is.

[Host Birch]

Really? I was shocked by that.

[Co-host Bert]

I just think. I wonder, you know, the pressure of. And that's got to be a first date average because I just wonder the pressure on impressing somebody. Because it seems that to impress somebody, you feel the need to go to the nicest restaurants, which include the valet, which include the tip and the alcohol being so much. And then to go to a nice restaurant, you have to dress really nice. And that's the clothes and. And, you know. Well, and now with gas prices, you got to factor in the gas, depending on how far you have to go to pick her up and stuff.

[Co-host Emily]

I was thinking the car detailing would be in there too, because guys, you know, normally keep their car kind of trashy. But when it's the first date night.

[Host Birch]

Cleaning up the girl, you gotta go.

[Co-host Emily]

To the car wash, get it detailed, clean it Up.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Yeah.

[Host Birch]

Y' all aren't gonna know how. How much of a slob we are until date three. Because we can keep the car clean for two days, but day three, you'll start to see the signs. Maybe a French fry. Maybe it'll just be one French fry.

[Co-host Bert]

That brown sign burnt one.

[Host Birch]

Yeah, It's a sign of things to come.

[Co-host Emily]

One gym sock that smells like it.

[Host Birch]

Maybe one Dasani bottle on the third date, but by the fifth date, it's like three Dasani bottles. Good morning, William.

[Caller/Guest]

Good morning.

[Host Birch]

Hi.

[Caller/Guest]

How are you?

[Host Birch]

Good, sir. How are you doing?

[Caller/Guest]

Great. I'm here at work.

[Host Birch]

And where is that?

[Caller/Guest]

I work at Front Page.

[Host Birch]

At Front Page.

[Co-host Bert]

Okay.

[Host Birch]

Okay. Can you help us with this whole bar alcohol thing?

[Caller/Guest]

It's a general 30% markup.

[Host Birch]

30% markup? I would think it would be more than that.

[Caller/Guest]

Well, I also. I help run the kitchen, too, and that's about the same restaurant, wide on food, liquor. It's also, according to how much business we do, we do about, you know, 60,000 a week in bar sales.

[Co-host Bert]

I'm right. So I thought it'd be more of a markup than that.

[Caller/Guest]

Yeah, some places are. Some places actually can go as high as 80%.

[Host Birch]

Is that right?

[Caller/Guest]

But that's like, you know, if you're asking for, like, bar. Well, stuff like stoley. Things like that, or you're asking for absolute run.

[Host Birch]

If you go top shelf. How much is the markup on that top shelves?

[Caller/Guest]

About 30%. Just because you can't charge anymore for markup. I mean, a good martini will cost you 11, 12 bucks anywhere. Yeah, they can still sell you cheap martini at $9 and make, you know, 50% markup.

[Co-host Emily]

And that's why those martini nights that Shannon was telling us about, like, the $5 martini nights, become so huge places.

[Host Birch]

Because they're making a fortune off those. I didn't think of that.

[Co-host Bert]

And that's why some guys I know that are bigger guys who always do shots, you know, and having to do shots because they're trying to get the feel of the alcohol without having to pay 15 bucks for every drink.

[Host Birch]

Hey, Jenna.

[Co-host Phil]

Hello.

[Host Birch]

Good morning. What's up?

[Co-host Emily]

Good morning.

[Caller/Guest]

My husband and I, we just recently moved to Atlanta. We sold our bar in Southern California. The average markup for top shelf is 300%.

[Host Birch]

300%?

[Narrator/Advertiser]

300%.

[Co-host Bert]

That's the average markup even. I mean, because the guy just said 30%. So do you see a difference in Southern California as opposed to Atlanta when y' all have gone out?

[Caller/Guest]

Actually, we haven't.

[Narrator/Advertiser]

Really?

[Caller/Guest]

Been out? We just moved here probably about a month and a half ago.

[Co-host Emily]

Okay.

[Host Birch]

Don't you wish everything was negotiable?

[Co-host Emily]

Yeah.

[Host Birch]

Like, you could just walk into a club, and now knowing that it's 300% markup, you go, Nope. Not going to give you 11 bucks for that martini, but let's start at seven, right? And meet seven.

[Caller/Guest]

Seven.

[Co-host Bert]

You know, some auctioneer, the bartender becomes an auctioneer.

[Co-host Phil]

I ran into that this weekend. I was buying a couple drinks, and the bartender, he just kind of looks at me and he. I swear, I think he just threw a figure at me to see if I pay for it, because I got like, two drinks and he's like, oh, let's just say $18. I'm like, where did that come from?

[Host Birch]

Wait.

[Co-host Phil]

Okay, I'll give you ten and a tip and we'll call it even.

[Host Birch]

And if you're on a first date, you don't want to look like a cheap ass and all, so you go, okay, no problem. 18 bucks. I got you, buddy. But in the back of your mind, you're like, hey, do that.

[Co-host Emily]

That's a freaking 12 pack.

[Co-host Phil]

Can't eat for two days. And then another problem on the first dates, too. If you end up meeting up with friends, you got to impress the friends, too. I've been there before. One of the first dates me and Mary Kay went on, we met up with some friends and we had been drinking. So I go to the bar and order a round of shots. I mean, there's another 40 bucks right there, too, but you gotta pay for it to impress them.

[Host Birch]

It's gonna hurt, guys. On average, you're spending $310 on your dates. Women 295 the Burch Show.

[Caller/Guest]

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[Co-host Emily]

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[Caller/Guest]

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[Co-host Emily]

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[Co-host Emily]

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[Narrator/Advertiser]

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[Co-host Phil]

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[Host Birch]

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