Vault: Male Teachers Confess To Being Treated Differently

Summary

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The Bert Show: "Vault: Male Teachers Confess To Being Treated Differently"

Date: February 3, 2026
Host(s): Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy (The Bert Show Cast)

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Overview

This episode of The Bert Show tackles an intriguing and often overlooked question: Do male teachers face a double standard in how they're treated, trusted, and expected to interact with students compared to their female colleagues? The discussion was sparked by a recent article on AJC.com and is fueled by calls from both male and female teachers, as well as a high school student. The hosts and callers explore societal perceptions, school policies (official and unofficial), and the real-life impact these biases have on classroom dynamics and teacher-student relationships.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Societal Double Standards for Male Teachers

• Double Standards in Trust & Interaction

  • Female teachers talking with students alone is generally accepted; for male teachers, it can be seen as suspicious or risky.
  • Quote: “Few people raise an eyebrow if a female teacher talks with a student alone. When it happens with a male teacher... the situation can be misconstrued." (Host 2, 00:22)
  • Male teachers often avoid being alone with a student, keep doors open, or invite another adult into the room to protect themselves.

• Touch and Physical Contact

  • Female elementary teachers feel free to hug students or help with clothing malfunctions; male teachers generally avoid these actions to prevent misunderstandings.
  • Quote: “Children are quick to hug. Female teachers hug back with little hesitation. Male teachers say they're more likely to give pats on the back or on the head.” (Host 2, 00:56)
  • Male teachers may delegate situations involving physical contact—like helping with clothing—to female staff.

2. Teacher and Caller Experiences

• Male Teacher Perspective

  • A fourth-grade teacher describes the need to “always be on” and the atmosphere of precaution, resulting in “artificial and robotic” interactions (Male Teacher, 02:43).
  • Not always an official school policy, but administrators advise male teachers not to be alone with students, especially girls.
  • Female teachers alone with students is not scrutinized in the same way.

• Female Teacher Perspective

  • A female teacher says she avoids initiating any physical contact with students, even refraining from hugs, based on training received in college.
  • Quote: “I definitely am never going to initiate any contact...Just so nothing is said.” (Female Teacher, 04:33)
  • If a student hugs her, she’ll give a pat on the back and try to step away to “protect herself,” but notes that female teachers are generally more comfortable hugging students.

• Female Teacher Caller’s View on Trust

  • Argues women are more trusted due to “motherly instinct,” and suggests men are viewed as more likely to have “sexual thoughts,” leading to more distrust.
  • Hosts challenge this generalization, pointing out recent cases of female teacher misconduct, and question whether sexual thoughts have any place in elementary school contexts.

3. Student Perspective

• High School Student Caller
  • Feels male teachers are easier to talk to and more approachable, especially after “middle school drama” around male teachers and rumors.
  • Notes male teachers seem to give respect akin to friendships.
  • Personal tutoring with male teachers hasn't led to any problems or inappropriate behavior.

4. Perceptions of Risk and Accusation

• Impact on Male Teachers

  • Male teachers live with the fear that even a baseless accusation can ruin their reputation, and preventive measures are more about reputation than actual risk.
  • Quote: “All it takes is one accusation and then their reputation’s done.” (Caller 1, 01:27)
  • Even after being cleared, the stigma of past investigations can linger.

• Parental and Administrative Attitudes

  • Perceived risk leads to stricter unwritten rules for male teachers.
  • In preschool, male staff aren’t allowed to change kids—it's only done by women.

5. Misconduct – Who Is To Blame?

• Female Teachers Can Be Offenders, Too
  • Hosts and callers reference cases of female teachers taking advantage of students, challenging the perception that risk comes only from men.
  • Discussion includes the relatively small age gap between young high school teachers and older students, and the mutual attraction dynamics that may arise.

6. Staff Room Culture and Student-Teacher Lines

• Comments and Flirting
  • A male teacher shares that both male and female teachers have been inappropriate in joking about students, but female teachers sometimes joke or flirt with students as well.
  • Quote: “I've seen female teachers make little comments about the little high school students...Certain teachers would flirt with...students.” (Male Teacher Caller, 12:25)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On the “Paranoia” of Male Teachers:
  • “It's almost like you have to always be on...artificial and robotic.” (Male Teacher, 02:43)
• On Parental Perceptions:
  • “What teachers are worried about is a parent...Once that's on your reputation, it's on there.” (Host 1, 10:50)
• On Female Teacher Comfort:
  • “Female teacher will definitely give them a hug...we really do have to protect ourselves.” (Female Teacher, 05:20)
• On Societal Assumptions:
  • “I think in society there is that attitude that men think about sex more than women...with the male teacher, like, yeah, I should have known, where with the female teacher: there's no way.” (Caller 1, 11:48)
• On Staffroom Dynamics:
  • “I've seen female teachers make little comments about the little high school students...certain teachers would flirt with...students.” (Male Teacher Caller, 12:25)

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Important Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment Highlight | |------------|-----------------------------------------------------------| | 00:22 | Framing the double standard—male vs. female teachers | | 02:43 | Male elementary teacher discusses the need for hyper-vigilance | | 04:33 | Female teacher on not initiating any physical contact | | 05:20 | Distinction between male and female teacher behavior | | 06:38 | Female teacher caller explains why women are trusted more | | 09:19 | High school student on comfort with male teachers | | 10:50 | Host on lasting impact of accusations on male teachers | | 12:25 | Male high school teacher describes female staff behavior |

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Tone & Language

The Bert Show crew maintains their hallmark blend of humor and authenticity, joking about pop culture (e.g., references to “Wild Things”), but are respectful and candid when addressing sensitive topics. Callers bring personal, practical, and sometimes challenging perspectives—some defending traditional beliefs, others challenging the status quo.

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Summary

This episode offers a candid, multifaceted look at the entrenched double standard facing male teachers. Through personal stories and thoughtful discussion, the cast exposes the heightened caution, extra barriers, and potential injustices male teachers often endure—which are rarely imposed on their female counterparts. The discussion expands into cultural assumptions about men, the effects of threat-perception on classroom warmth, and whether such suspicions are justified.

Listeners come away with a nuanced view: both men and women can be trusted—or violate trust—and blanket generalizations ultimately serve neither students nor educators. The episode closes with a recognition that the issue runs deeper than school policies—it's rooted in societal narratives that still need unpacking.

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Transcript

[Host 1]

Get it?

[Host 2]

The bird show. We know we got a lot of teachers that listen this early in the morning. And I was on ajc.com a couple days ago and I saw this debate starting to brew and I thought it was pretty interesting because I never really thought of it this way before. But the debate is, do male teachers face a double standard? And here's what was written. Few people raise an eyebrow if a female teacher talks with a student alone. When it happens with a male teacher. Yeah, the situation can be misconstrued. I've heard male middle and high school teachers say they try to never be alone with a student. Some invite a female colleague into the room or move the conversation into the hallway. If they must be alone with a student, many male teachers leave the door open. Some say they stand near the doorway so it doesn't look like something clandestine is going on. Male elementary school teachers, particularly those in kindergarten, face different challenges at that young age. Children are quick to hug. Female teachers hug back with little hesitation. Male teachers say they're more likely to give pats on the back or on the head. Many female kindergarten teachers will help kids with problematic snaps and zippers and helps kid change their pants if they have an accident. The male kindergarten teachers I've met said they don't do that because it could be misinterpreted. Instead, they ask a female paraprofessional to step in. As a society, do we trust female teachers more than we trust male teachers? And why was the question?

[Caller 1]

I think that's just an over. To me that would be an overall theme. Because I bet, I don't know. Yeah, I bet even fathers I can imagine of daughters as they grow older, probably are a lot more self conscious about things than mothers are. I just think in general, you know, men probably always have to think that in the back of their mind because all it takes is one accusation and then their reputation's done.

[Caller 2]

Sure, I hadn't even thought about that. But yeah, you see female teachers as being maternal in that way, but, but male teachers, I'm sure that would raise an eyebrow.

[Host 2]

You guys see now is that now it seems more than ever you're starting to see female teachers that are the ones that are accused of this kind of behavior. It's generally with like high school boys. But it sure seems like we're seeing that way more than we see guys. Now.

[Host 1]

You guys remember what happened to Matt Dillon in the movie Wild Things, which I think is a true story.

[Host 2]

At least the full scene was.

[Female Teacher]

Yeah, yeah.

[Host 1]

Denise Richards and Neve Campbell Washing his car.

[Caller 1]

And this is why a lot of times men aren't trusted.

[Host 1]

I think it's crap because every time I walk into a room with a girl and shut the door, she opens it back up and blows a whistle and sprays me with mace. And I've done nothing to deserve that.

[Host 2]

Ashley, you're on Q100.

[Host 1]

Good morning, 911.

[Male Teacher]

What's going on, Burkshaw?

[Host 2]

What's up, man?

[Male Teacher]

Nothing much. I'm actually an elementary school teacher and I teach fourth grade. And I have to make sure that I have and another adult within ear distance, within earshot, if I'm having to discipline a child, male or female. I've been teaching for like three years now, and it's almost like you have to, you know, you have to be proactive. And I'm not saying that's a bad thing, but it's almost like you have to always be on, which means you have to always be aware of every single thing. You can't have a natural situation, which sometimes are the best when you're in an educational environment, but you have to always be almost artificial and robotic.

[Host 2]

Is it school policy that if you have to keep a girl after class or whatever, and you're gonna talk to her one on one, that there has to be a woman there in the room with you?

[Male Teacher]

Yeah.

[Host 1]

Really?

[Host 2]

And I wonder if.

[Male Teacher]

You know what? I'm not sure if it's actually school policy, but I think it's been said to me by my administrator, probably just a good.

[Host 1]

They may not make it an official policy because that might be. You might be able to argue sexism or whatever. But I think they could probably, on a one on one basis, say to all the guy teachers, hey, for your own sake.

[Host 2]

But I wonder if they're doing it to the women teachers also.

[Host 1]

I think it's more relevant to the guy teachers.

[Male Teacher]

I don't see that happening. I don't see that happening in my situation. I've seen women teachers alone, let's say, if I want to maybe keep a child from, you know, maybe they were misbehaving or some situation, and I won't let it. Lord, let my kids go out of recess and with another teacher, and I stay inside with that child. That's not ever going to happen ever.

[Host 1]

Right?

[Male Teacher]

That's not ever happening. So I'll end up going out with another child, with other teachers, children, and, you know, let her stay in.

[Host 2]

Ben, I think, is going to say the same thing. Hey, Ben.

[Male Teacher Caller]

Hey.

[Female Teacher]

Good morning, guys.

[Host 2]

Good morning.

[Female Teacher]

I definitely am never going to initiate any contact. I teach second grade, and some of my students, you know, they definitely want to come up and hug you in the morning or anything. Definitely don't want to initiate any contact. Just so nothing is said.

[Caller 2]

If they come and hug you, you can hug back, though, right?

[Female Teacher]

Well, you know, actually in college, especially when we were doing our student teaching and stuff, they said don't ever initiate contact because that's when you get in trouble.

[Host 1]

But what Jen said is if they can, like if you're standing at the head of the class and, you know, the first student of the day runs to the door and sees you and is like, you know what, shane? You know, Mr. Burt. And comes up and wraps their arms around your legs, what do you do?

[Female Teacher]

Generally just letting you know, maybe a pat on the back and you kind of try and step away. Just, you know, just protect yourself.

[Host 2]

And you don't see the female teachers doing the same thing.

[Host 1]

Right.

[Female Teacher]

Female teacher will definitely give them a hug. And, you know, it's. It's crazy, but, you know, it's. We really do have to protect ourselves.

[Host 1]

Sure.

[Caller 1]

Never thought of that. Yeah, I'm trying to think. In my elementary school, the first male teacher I had wasn't until the sixth grade. So it was all female teachers until then. So I was trying to think if I ever witnessed that myself. And by the time, you know, we weren't running in the class hugging by the sixth grade, so.

[Host 2]

Hey, Sonya, you're on Q100. Good morning.

[Female Teacher Caller]

Good morning, everybody. I love you guys.

[Host 2]

You sound like a teacher. Good morning.

[Female Teacher Caller]

Very much. I actually wanted to comment about the female being trusted more because I think you guys need to understand that naturally we have that motherly instinct with the kids, and if we have that passion, it absolutely comes unnaturally. And we don't have those second thoughts like generally. And forgive me, male have. I know that, you know, forgive me, the males, you know, the men. I'm sure that there are some awesome male teachers out there, but lately we have had a lot of abuse with the men in general. So I think absolutely the females need to be, you know, they're trusted more. And I think it's absolutely, perfectly understood.

[Host 2]

So if I'm. If I'm reading you right, what you're saying is that women can be trusted more than men because men have more sexual thoughts per day than women do.

[Female Teacher Caller]

I didn't want to say that, but since you brought it up, that's what I was thinking.

[Host 2]

I think that's a crazy theory. I think that's a crazy Theory when it comes to little kids.

[Female Teacher Caller]

Well, but we have seen so much abuse generally. Generally with male. Because, I mean, I don't want to, you know, I don't want to put you guys down or anything. I'm telling you again, there are female.

[Host 1]

Teachers before you because I know you're trying to fool us with the accent, that you're all smart and whatnot. But if you go like, if you google it and you'd spend some time on the news, you'll see over the past couple years, several cases of female teachers taking advantage of their younger male students. And like the Mary Kay letronauturno letourneau, the girl down in Tampa is the one who comes to mind because she was pretty hot. I remember we were talking about the other day.

[Host 2]

That was just another one yesterday.

[Host 1]

Yeah.

[Female Teacher Caller]

Okay, Jeff, I know that you totally mean that. I'm trying to be smart, but. No, I'm not trying to be smart. I've been a teacher for six years, and I do elementary and high school.

[Host 1]

Right. But I'm just saying, how can you say that men have more thoughts and men shouldn't be teachers for that reason.

[Female Teacher Caller]

When I never said that males shouldn't be teachers, I clarified and said that I'm sure there are some wonderful male teachers. It's just that, I mean, Byrd was the one that brought it up and said about those sexual dogs. I didn't.

[Host 2]

Well, that's what you were saying. You just didn't say the words. But you're saying your theory is that men naturally are more sexual, so women as teachers would be more trustworthy around their students.

[Female Teacher Caller]

Yeah, but again, some males are also good. But yes, I'm sorry, the sexual thoughts are more there for male naturally.

[Caller 2]

That's hard to generalize, though. I mean, I would almost give her more credibility if we're just talking about high school, but because those girls are older, you know what I mean? And, like, maybe the potential for those thoughts to be there.

[Caller 1]

But.

[Caller 2]

But elementary school.

[Caller 1]

Well, we're not just talking about elementary school in the conversation, but I don't know where. What she was doing. But let me ask the guys. If you had for your children, when it comes to teachers, would you be more comfortable with your child having a personal conference with a female teacher or male teacher, or would it even enter your mind?

[Host 2]

Doesn't matter to me at all now. I don't have girls. I've got two boys. I don't know if that changes the equation at all. But as far as my kids go and the boys, it doesn't matter to me. Good morning. Whitney is on the voice disguiser. Hi, Whitney.

[Student Caller]

Hi. Sorry, I'm sort of hoarse. I've lost my voice. I just wanted to comment. I'm a senior at South High, and I feel that it's a lot easier to talk to my male teachers. And this year I have five guy teachers out of six classes, so I just feel that they're a lot easier to talk to. But then I grew up with my dad, and I grew up with a brother, so I just. I feel once you get past, like, the middle school drama of like, oh, my God, my teacher's gonna rape me, then you get sort of. You can have a closer connection with them.

[Caller 2]

You felt that way in middle school?

[Student Caller]

No. High school changed because you have, like, all the rumors spreading in middle school, like, don't trust your guy teachers. But once you get to high school, you realize, okay, well, they're cooler to talk to. I mean, they. I mean, they almost, like, they're easier to talk to like a friend standpoint rather than like, on a superior level of you have to give them respect, but they give you the same respect as, like, a friend would.

[Host 2]

Are they very, very careful, especially when.

[Host 1]

You'Re in their car?

[Host 2]

Are they very, very careful not to have, like, just one on one conversations with you?

[Student Caller]

See, I go in for personal tutoring in the morning, and I've never seen a problem.

[Host 1]

You meet him at his house, just.

[Student Caller]

A guy teacher, and I've never seen a problem.

[Host 2]

You've never felt like anything inappropriate was ever said between a teacher and you?

[Student Caller]

Nope.

[Host 1]

I don't think. I think the reason that the teachers are doing it are not because there's going to be a problem. I think we're going down the wrong avenue when we say when girls are alone with male teachers, there's gonna be a problem. I think what the teachers are worried about is a parent. Like some random parent. Like this girl's parent, let's say she randomly says, oh, yeah, I've been going in with Mr. Weiss to have tutoring every morning, twice a week. And her parents are like, what? What teacher is going to arrive at school a half hour early to give a student extra special tutoring or whatever, and then just raise it to the awareness of the principal. And then the teacher's got to deal with all that. Like the very first thing you said, Bert, is once that's on your reputation, it's on there. Like, once they've looked into it, even if they find nothing wrong, ten years later, if they look into it again. Then the newspaper runs the article that says and he was investigated for this 10 years ago, you know what I'm saying? And there's zero wrong. So why not have somebody, another teacher sit in the back of the classroom and grade papers?

[Caller 1]

Well, and going on your theory about the parents too, and even that other teacher. I think in society generally there is that attitude that men think about sex more than women and that people would. If an accusation was made against a male teacher and an accusation was made against a female teacher, then more than likely with the male teacher, like, yeah, I should have known where with the female teacher there's no way, you know what I mean? Like, I just think as a general rule we see men and women differently.

[Host 2]

I'm not going to be able to get to Stacy, but she was calling in to say that at her preschool the guys aren't allowed to change the kids, has to be a woman. But most calls are coming in from guys looking to disagree with Sonya. Go ahead, Gene.

[Male Teacher Caller]

Hey, how you guys doing? Yeah, I was just like I was saying, I was listening and you know, I've been a professional teacher for about, you know, six years myself and I mean I've dealt with plenty of kids, little girls to 18 year old girls. And I've seen, you know, students act, you know, the same towards me as a female teacher. I've seen female teachers make little comments about the little high school students, you know, about, oh, did you see, you know, throwing names out there, Timmy today in his basketball shorts, you know, and I've seen, you know, I'm kind of young myself. I'm like 27. So I've seen, you know, teachers, teachers in the teachers lines do a lot of things that a lot of people don't really expect.

[Host 2]

Are the female teachers more inappropriate when you guys are all around with each other and joking around and talking about the students? Are the women more inappropriate about the students than the guys are?

[Male Teacher Caller]

Well, I guess it all depends on the school you go to. I work in metro Atlanta, so some teachers I do work with are a lot younger and especially in high school. I know they've, I know they've been hit on a couple of times. So they've been hit on. I don't want to say all schools.

[Female Teacher]

I don't want to say, you know.

[Male Teacher Caller]

I put my school out there. But sometimes, sometimes.

[Host 2]

What were you saying, Jen?

[Caller 2]

They were hit on by students or they were hitting on students.

[Male Teacher Caller]

They were getting hit on by students. You know, like how students made little comments and you know, certain teachers would flirt with. And then one student, you know, as far as going by, you know, male joking around too much with the student, it was actually the female teacher who was joking around too much with the student. The student took it the wrong way, told his mother, came up to the school and it just, you know, blew up until like how Kaiser say it? Well, I didn't mean it to be like that, but, you know, well, I.

[Caller 1]

Think well, I think you find that, I mean, a teacher is going to graduate college, let's say, what, 22, 23 years old, and then they go into a class if they go to high school. So a senior in high school is only like five years younger than their teacher. So I think that's a whole different type of dynamic that where you could have problems.

[Male Teacher Caller]

Get it the Birch Show.