The Bert Show – Vault: The Best Ways To Potty Train

Air Date: January 5, 2026
Podcast: The Bert Show (Pionaire Podcasting)
Hosts and Contributors: Bert, Kristin, other regular co-hosts, and several parent/caregiver callers
Main Theme: Potty Training Strategies, Pitfalls, and Parental Frustrations

Episode Overview

In this episode, Bert and the crew tackle the daunting and often messy process of potty training young children. Bert, feeling overwhelmed by his son Hayden's hit-and-miss potty training attempts, turns to the show's audience for real-life advice and encouragement. What emerges is an honest and entertaining exchange of personal failures and successes, highlighting the unpredictable journey of introducing children to the potty, especially when confronted with conflicting advice and mounting frustration.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Bert’s Potty Training Dilemma

• [01:32] Bert opens up: his two-and-a-half-year-old son Hayden is in the throes of potty training. Number one (‘pee’) is going okay, but number two (‘poop’) is leading to “a poop fest” around the house.
  • Quote: “It’s a poop fest right now… it’s like a minefield in my house sometimes.” (Bert, 03:13)
• Bert and his wife Stacy feel lost, admitting they don’t have many friends with kids and are mostly relying on a half-read book.

2. When to Start Potty Training? Is It Too Early or Late?

• [03:16, 05:27] The team and callers discuss timing:
  • Boys often take longer than girls.
  • Two-and-a-half is typical, but every child’s readiness varies.
  • Quote: “I have heard also that boys do it later than girls.” (Co-host, 03:18)

3. Common Techniques and Positive Reinforcement

• Potty Parties and Treats

  • [04:30] Caller Karen shares her “potty parties” strategy with celebratory noisemakers and Skittles for every successful attempt.
    • Quote: “We did those and then... we gave them... a Skittle each time that they went potty. It took two weeks.” (Karen, 04:46)
  • Bert mentions using ‘mini M&Ms’ at home and stickers as another incentive.
  • “Tattoos” (temporary) and “Thomas trains” were also offered as rewards (06:23, 08:03).

• Target Practice with Cereal

  • [07:27] A nanny caller describes putting cereal in the toilet for target practice, turning the act into a game, especially for boys.

4. Stick With It or Take a Break? The ‘Don’t Go Back’ Debate

• [05:36, 06:38, 08:39]
  • Several callers advise not going back to diapers or pull-ups once you start, warning that regression confuses the child and delays results.
    • Quote: “Do not go back to diapers, Bert.” (Karen, 06:38)
  • Opposing perspective from Amy, who shared that pushing her daughter too early led to more issues, and a break helped when her child showed readiness later:
    • Quote: “If you force kids, that’s the worst thing you can do, because then they’re petrified of it… So we backed off for a little bit, and then… she came [back] to me: ‘Mommy, I need to go potty.’” (Amy, 09:34, 10:40)

5. Frequency Tricks and Scheduling

• [06:01, 08:27]
  • Bert and callers share various intervals for taking kids to the potty: every 45 minutes, every two hours, or timing number two attempts differently (every 50 minutes).
  • Keeping kids focused (visually looking down) can sometimes trigger the urge to go, particularly with boys.

6. Leading by Example

• [06:46] Some parents and partners encourage letting children witness parents using the toilet to demystify the process—though consensus breaks down over whether witnessing a parent’s “number two” is helpful or just gross.
  • Quote: “For a while there [Stacy] wanted me to show him number one and number two... I’m like, that’s crazy talk right there. No. No one is sitting there pooping in front of their kid.” (Bert, 06:52)

7. Parental Frustration and Humor

• Bert and the co-hosts keep the atmosphere light but honest, highlighting the emotional rollercoaster parents endure:
  • Quote: “Can you exchange him for a new kid? Two puppies. Hey, you want to trade?” (Bert, 11:49)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “It’s like a minefield in my house sometimes.” (Bert, 03:13)
• “We gave them a Skittle each time that they went potty… it took two weeks.” (Caller Karen, 04:46)
• “We would let him pick out his cereal and say, okay, you got to shoot the target.” (Caller Nanny, 07:27)
• “Do not go back to diapers, Bert.” (Caller Karen, 06:38)
• “If you force kids, that’s the worst thing you can do, because then they’re petrified of it.” (Caller Amy, 09:34)
• “You gotta get rid of what you used to do and keep trying to go forward.” (Caller Karen, 06:40)
• “It’s kind of like a trial and game era with her that we did with the potty training.” (Caller Amy, 11:03)

Timestamps to Key Segments

• 01:32: Bert’s opening rant - the “poop fest” at home
• 03:11: Co-hosts and Bert discuss Hayden’s age and typical timelines for boys
• 04:24 – 05:40: Caller Karen explains the “potty party” method and age experiences
• 06:01 – 06:46: Caller Cassie shares starting early, use of gumball machines, and why not to revert to diapers
• 06:46 – 07:08: Debate over letting kids watch parents on the toilet
• 07:23 – 08:36: Nanny caller’s target practice method and reward schedule
• 09:34 – 11:10: Caller Amy describes her failed first attempt, taking a break, and eventually succeeding
• 11:49: Bert jokes about trading his son for puppies

Conclusions & Takeaways

• There’s no universal path: Every child (and parent) will experience potty training differently; readiness, personality, and persistence all play roles.
• Positive reinforcement works: Treats, stickers, toys, and even small parties make the process more engaging.
• Consistency versus compassion: The ongoing debate—should you never go back, or is it humane (and sometimes effective) to take a break and try later?
• Don’t be afraid to laugh: Comic relief and empathy help parents through this universally messy milestone.

For parents embarking on their own potty training adventure, this episode offers hard-earned advice, reassurance, and candid testimonials that every ‘poop fest’ eventually ends—with patience, creativity, and a lot of cleaning supplies.