The Bert Show: Vault - "We Debate Over This Love Lost And Found"

Date: January 7, 2026
Podcast Host: Pionaire Podcasting
Cast: Bert, Kristin, Abby, Cassie, Tommy, Intern Jen
Episode Theme: The crew unpacks a real-life love mystery about a missed connection, using their classic mix of comedic banter, candid honesty, and listener call-ins to debate the etiquette and implications of buying drinks for strangers—and what “getting ghosted” really means.

Episode Overview

This episode centers around the Bert Show's "Love Lost and Found" segment, where listeners try to reconnect with people they've met but lost contact with. Julia, this week's participant, sparked a debate about relationship boundaries after meeting a guy named Chris at a bar, only for him to disappear mid-conversation. The episode tracks the Bert Show crew as they investigate the situation, confirm the real story, and then broaden the discussion to relationship etiquette, sending clear (and hilarious) signals, and decoding social cues.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Explaining "Love Lost and Found"

• [01:54] The segment is about helping listeners find people they've met but lost touch with.
• “Two people meet out and about somewhere, strike up a great conversation, but for some reason...one of them doesn't seal the deal by getting a number. So they're frustrated, want to reconnect with the person, come to us...” (Co-host at 01:54)

2. Julia's Story Recap & Listeners Weigh In

• [03:00] Julia recounts meeting Chris at East Andrews; he’s from Denver, graduated from Emory, lives in Buckhead, and told her he was a management consultant.
• She remembers him leaving during their chat, apparently to the restroom—and never coming back.
• There is initial confusion as two different callers claim they know Chris, and friend Travis appears to have pranked the show by pretending to be him.
• Hilarity ensues as the hosts joke about "ugly kids" not qualifying for the segment (02:24), plus a running gag about "smelly" Travis and his supposed cat house odor.

3. Solving the Mystery: The Real Chris & The Lost Connection

• [07:05] The team finally connects with the real Chris live on air, verifying the details:
  • From Boulder (close to Denver)
  • Skied at Winter Park, lives in Buckhead, Emory grad, and at East Andrews that night, wearing the clothes Julia described.
• Chris admits stepping away both to use the restroom and because he felt uncomfortable, as he has a girlfriend and didn’t want to give Julia the wrong idea.

“I do have a girlfriend, and I felt like our conversation was starting to get to the point where I was giving her the wrong idea.”
– Chris, 08:12

4. Debate: Is Buying a Drink Cheating?

• The group explores whether it’s inappropriate, in a relationship, to buy someone else a drink at a bar—even as a friendly birthday gesture.
• Chris clarifies he was going to offer Julia a shot because it was her birthday, not for romantic reasons.
• Chris had also discussed it with his girlfriend, who said she wouldn’t have minded the gesture.

“If you had bought her the drink, it would not have been a problem with me.”
– Chris, recounting his girlfriend’s stance, 10:37

• Hosts and callers weigh in on the birthday exception and if context matters.

5. How to Exit Amicably (Ghosting, But Polite)—For Both Genders

• The panel jokingly blames men for being “dumb” but honest, compared to women’s tendency to read too much into signals (15:19).
• Host reflects: “We like to be all out there and be honest with you guys. You guys are constantly manipulating, playing these games.” (15:47)
• Julia and Chris both admit it’s sometimes easier to walk away than awkwardly introduce a boyfriend/girlfriend into the conversation (13:03-13:36).

“If they don’t come back from the bathroom, either they got some real colon problems, or they’re just not interested.”
– Julia, 14:53

6. What’s the Real Signal? Advice for the Heartbroken

• Caller Deborah praises Chris for walking away before crossing a line (13:59).
• Hosts riff on how “if a guy never comes back, it’s a clear sign.”
• They urge listeners—especially women—not to overanalyze in these situations; the social cue is simple.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [02:09] “It’s love. It’s lost and then it’s found.” (Co-host)
• [02:24] “We don’t do love lost and found for ugly kids.” (Co-host)
• [05:11] “Every Travis is a dirtbag.” (Co-host)
• [08:12] “To the contrary, I do have a girlfriend, and I felt like our conversation was starting to get to the point where I was giving her the wrong idea.” (Chris)
• [13:43] “Nobody owes anybody anything at that point.” (Host)
• [14:02] “If he never shows back up after he says, I’ll be right back, he’s just not that into you.” (Host)
• [15:38] “I’m here to tell you guys I have your back. We’re dumb.” (Host)
• [14:53] "If they don't come back from the bathroom, either they've got some real colon problems or they're just not interested." (Julia)

Timestamps for Important Segments

| Time | Segment Description | |---------|---------------------------------------------------------| | 01:54 | How "Love Lost and Found" works | | 03:00 | Julia shares her story; listens call in | | 07:05 | The real Chris confirmed, questioned, explains events | | 08:12 | Chris admits having a girlfriend and motivation to exit | | 10:30 | Group discussion—buying drinks while in a relationship | | 13:03 | Gender differences: Is it easier to walk away or state intentions? | | 14:02 | Clear signals: If he leaves, he’s not that into you | | 15:38 | “We’re dumb”: The “men are simple” debate |

Tone, Humor & Candidness

The episode is marked by the Bert Show’s signature style—irreverent, playful, but always with a commitment to real talk and authenticity. Their comedic riffs (about “smelly Travis,” “cat pee houses,” and “dumb men”) are balanced with genuine attempts to give useful dating advice and relate to listeners’ experiences.

Takeaways & Lessons

• On Ghosting: If someone walks away and never comes back, the signal is pretty clear, don’t overthink it.
• On Intentions: Sometimes, especially for men, it's easier to exit than clarify relationship status in the moment.
• On Boundaries: Context matters (e.g., buying a birthday shot), but honesty and communication are key.
• For Heartbroken Listeners: Closure is valuable, even if the reality isn’t the fairy-tale ending.

For New Listeners

If you missed the drama, this episode is a classic example of how the Bert Show balances entertainment, humor, and real-life dilemmas, all while treating both their listeners and on-air guests with respect—and a wink.

Want to chime in next time? Call the Bert Show or join the conversation at their website!