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Bill Simmons
This episode is brought to you by Michelob Ultra. Cracking open a cold one on a hot summer day is one of the best feelings, but it's even better when it feels like you earned it. Like in a friendly little competition. It's always better when there's something worth playing for. And Michelob Ultra, a superior light beer is a pretty great prize. I would. I mean, I would be all tennis for Michelob Ultras because that's what I do all summer. Because tennis is an actual sport, unlike pickleball. So tennis, doubles, singles, whatever. Let's play for an Ultra. Fill your fridge with Michelob Ultra this summer@doordash.com enjoy responsibly. Copyright 2025 Anheuser Busch Michelob Ultra Light Beer, St. Louis, Missouri this episode is brought to you by Wayfair. Your home is more than a space. It's where you express yourself. Like, we've all got our game day set up, right? I'm all about the viewing experience and the entertaining. So I got my sofa in optimum viewing position and I got my grill and patio set up for halftime or after the game. Whatever your vibe, Wayfair is the trusted destination for all things home. They've got all your home essentials, storage solutions, decor and more all in one place. Get inspired with room ideas and curated collections, all with everyday ways to save. Shop everything home@wayfair.com with free and easy delivery straight to your door. That is W A Y-F A I R.com Wayfair every style every Home the Bill Simmons Podcast is brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network where you can find the rewatchables. It will be our 397th movie on Monday night and it's a movie that I have been talking about and circling around really for the last couple years. Brian Koppelman also loves it. He joined me it's the 50th anniversary of rollerball, which is an absolutely amazing, amazing movie with James Caan and we finally had to do it. Couldn't have had a better time. So that's going up Monday night. You can watch it on The Ringer Movies YouTube channel as well. We are getting dangerously close to 400 movies. Can't believe it. And there's a bunch of. I still have a pretty big list. I didn't think we'd make it to 400. Now I feel like we have an outside chance of getting to 500 unless I die of natural causes before then. So that's it. Rollerball and then doing a more modern movie. The Week after, we're going to do all bangers. I'm going to try to do a mil bag at some point, too, during the. During the month of August, before we hit the whole football thing. For football. The Ringer fantasy football show, which is really heating up August is everyone. All the kids are saying it's the biggest month for that show, but people are starting to get fantasy opinions. There's some training camp, preseason stuff, skewing some of the rankings. So those guys are covering all of it. And we're gonna be doing more and more football as we get closer to the season, which feels early this year. It's basically Labor Day. And then all of a sudden, on September 4th, we're starting with football. I've been really bored by the sports, and I was trying to figure out why, and it was because last year I was looking at my podcast from last year. In August, we had the Olympics, so I had three. In the beginning of August, there was three straight podcasts. I did just about Team USA and the Olympics and. Or there'll be other summers where we'll have the World cup or we'll have another Summer Olympics or we'll have Women's World cup, or there'll be just some sort of goofy summer event or there will be a big trade. This has been really a lot of nothing. Like, I watched three hours of the FedEx St. Jude, whatever the hell that golf thing is, which was great, by the way. Tommy Fleetwood, I think he's the world's preeminent. When he has a lead near the end of something, you're just waiting for the other shoe to drop. And it always seems to drop with him. I feel bad for him, but it ended up being Justin Rose beating J.J. spahn in a triple playoff game. And it was a triple playoff match. And it was really exciting. And I was like, I shouldn't be this excited. This is golf. This isn't even one of the four majors, but I am really ready for football. I might even be ready for college football at this point. Coming up on this podcast, Shield Capati is going to come on. We're talking about the Eagles at the very top for a second, but really, I have my 2025 QB pyramid, and I have a couple doozy choices that I made on those that I really came. Genuinely, I really felt strongly about them. So he is coming on. We're going to go through the whole pyramid. He's going to be my conciliary for it. And then old friend Kevin Wilds is here to do Some half baked ideas. So that is the Sunday podcast and I think I'm going to have one more podcast middle of the week this week too. So hold on to your seats. It's all coming up next. We're going to take a break and then Pearl Jam. All right, recording this late afternoon Pacific Time. Shield Capati is here. You can read him on theringer.com, great website hosted in the Philly special. Lot of Philly stuff. The Phillies kicked the Red Sox ass a couple weeks ago. I did not enjoy that. Almost sent Roman Anthony into a funk. And the Ringer NFL show, which you're the host of, which we have some fun wrinkles coming for mid August. So first of all, you're an Eagles fan. So I've been studying the trying to figure out super bowl picks who to zag against. The Eagles have so much freaking talent. We do this every year with whoever the defending champ is. What would be the reason they didn't make it back to the Super Bowl? If you had to pinpoint one thing that you're worried about, what is it?
Shield Kapadia
I mean, there's always the injuries and that stuff, but the other thing I would probably say defensively, they've got two new pieces in the secondary that just no one's grabbed the jobs at corner and at safety. And so I think if you look at them last year it was one of those old school kind of, I guess a Belichick style defense where you're built from the back to the front, where their coverage was so good and so suffocating that the pass rush would get home. And so I do think there's a chance that if that coverage isn't as good now, all of a sudden the defense takes a step back. But I'm with you every time. I'm like, well, the schedule's hard and the defense could take us. It's just like, man, you do roster by roster and you're like, a lot of things would have to go wrong for them to not be in the mix.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I did my rankings and they just had the highest point total and it wasn't close. They were like 5, 6 points higher than anybody else. But the young cornerbacks you had, I thought were going to be assets. So you're, are you worried about the depth or you're worried about the starters?
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, no, they've got two who are awesome. Quinon Mitchell and Cooper De Jean. It's kind of that other cornerback spot and then it's the safety spot. They traded Chauncey Gardner, Johnson in the off season. So these are first world problems. I mean, like, every Eagles team I've watched my entire life, you know, if you would have said these are the issues on your team, or if, you know, fans of other teams are listening, they're like, give me a break. Those aren't problems. You got A.J. brown and Saquon and Hertz and Jalen Carter and all pros all over the place. So, yeah, I don't want to overstate it. I still think they're going to be very good. But if you're painting the scenario, I think that's probably the biggest concern on the team right now.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, you have a top four offensive line. You can rush the passer. You can play pass defense. And you have, I would say, in the top four for skill position guys. Right. Top three. Top four. It's somewhere in there. The conversation starts with Cincinnati and Philly. The Kurtz relationship is kind of fun coming off the super bowl, right? Because you would think, like, he's cemented this guy's royalty in Philly, but it doesn't feel like that's 100% the case. It's more shifted toward Barkley. Right. What's. What's the Hertz Philly relationship right now?
Shield Kapadia
No, I think the. The. I think in Philly, everybody loves Hertz right now, and it's turned into this thing where he wins the super bowl. And then, like, I was on vacation for a few weeks there in June and July, and it was like, I came back and there were just like a million Hertz debates about, how did this person rank him there and what. What did Cam Newton say to him? And so you know how it is in a city like Philadelphia, where even if you were a fan who wasn't fully sold on Hertz, even after the super bowl, once other people start taking shots at him or doubting him now, you're like, screw you, you suck. He just won the Super Bowl. So that I think it's really turned into that. And maybe in a way, it's been a good thing for Hertz locally. Not only does he win the super bowl, but now everybody's just, like, behind him and are like, everybody else doesn't get it with this guy. He's our guy, and he's going to go do it again.
Bill Simmons
Interesting. So that actually works out for Jalen. Hurts. I think. He's got. He's got everybody. The Phillies are in a good spot, and all of the contempt in the city is just being shifted toward the. Toward the 76ers now.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, it's very weird how happy, like the, the sports fans here are pretty happy right now with this Eagles team. Like you said, the way the Phillies are playing here and the Sixers are. Honestly, I think people are just waiting for the next era to start, whenever that would be. So they, they feel like an afterthought right now.
Bill Simmons
Well, the crazy thing with the Eagles, because once you stay on top and if you start nailing a couple drafts in a row, you can really get a half decade out of this, which they've done. It feels like the 23 draft they crush. It feels like the 24 draft. How are you feeling about it? I wouldn't say it's like as, maybe not as impactful as 23, but it's still going to be impactful. Right. Because there's no way all the money you're sending out, you have to have young working class people kind of moving into some of those spots. So do you have that?
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, they got a linebacker and Jihad Campbell in the first round who seems like a great pick. Now, we'll see. But he's going to come in. He's expected to start right away. The safety they got in the second round, Andrew Makuba, he's expected to start right away. And then it's more what you're saying, rotational guys. Hey, you know Milton Williams signs with the Patriots. Well, you know, a guy who you drafted a few years ago now has to fill that role and now someone has to. So it's a lot of depth stuff. Now I will say they were very lucky with injuries last year and even 20, 22 when they made the Super Bowl. I mean, you look at the rosters they put out there during the actual super bowl and it's like they had 21 or 22 starters on the field. So that injury luck you can never predict. So yeah, their depth could get tested a little bit more this year.
Bill Simmons
Who is as you, as you worry about the Eagles and who could knock them out. Who's the one team in the NFC that you're like, I'm actually kind of afraid of those guys. I hope that team doesn't achieve the potential that in my head I think they have.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, I think, and I think I'm probably going to disagree with you about this because I've heard you kind of hint at it. Previously on the pod. I do think the 49ers are going to be a pretty big factor in the NFC this year. Now, I know like half their team's injured right now. I understand, but they have the easiest schedule in the entire NFL when you look at like super bowl odds or win totals or whatever. And I just feel like offensively they have a chance to be pretty good, where if they rack up a bunch of wins and now all of a sudden they get home field advantage, they could be a Super bowl contender. But, I mean, it's wide open as we'll talk about with some of these quarterbacks. I mean, Detroit, Green Bay, Washington, I think those are probably the four or five teams that I'm looking at where, hey, if they hit their ceiling, they have a chance to get to the Super Bowl.
Bill Simmons
Is there any Tampa, anything for you? I know Worfs is out for a few weeks, but anything about them interest you? They bring it back. So much continuity on offense. They're in the NFC south. Like, why. And they. And I actually thought they threw some haymakers in the playoffs last year, so why don't they get mentioned?
Shield Kapadia
My. I do think there is some buzz around the Bucks. My concern is that I thought that was a highly schemed offense last year for Baker Mayfield, where they did like a great job of he didn't have to throw into tight windows, a lot of shorter throws, and they lose the guy who was their offensive coordinator in Liam Cohen. Now, I'm not saying he's Bill Walsh or, you know, you could replace a guy like Liam Cohen. It just adds a little bit of an unknown to me where I'm, you know, I could see them, but playing in the NFC Championship Game, maybe being a sleeper, but I'm not willing to predict that. Cause I think it's just as likely that maybe their offense takes a little bit of a step back.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, see, I'm looking at that. I know a lot of people have talked about this, but I. I think the Lions are the number one team for me with that because we had the Patriots when they won the three and four years in the 2000s. Right. And beat Philly. McNabb threw up that third Super Bowl. And then basically it felt like the entire coaching staff left other than Belichick, and they had to turn over both coordinators. And, and, and it was like, oh, no, this would be easy. We'll just bring some new guys in. And it's not easy. It completely changes you. Just if you miss on one of the two spots, it's your coordinator. I don't know. I just. I felt like the Lions had these overqualified coordinators last year, and I don't know what I'm getting this year. Not to mention the Offensive lines were. So they have the second best odds in the NFC right now. The, the Eagles are plus 360 and then the Lions are plus 550 and then I don't know, the NFC just in general, there's a lot of depth and I think people are trying to figure out who the zag team is and I'm not sure the Rams had glimpses of it. But the Stafford thing is terrifying, which we're about to talk about when we do the QB pyramid. But old Matthew Stafford with a ton of miles on him already not looking like he's going to be ready for week one. That's my number one thing I'm watching. Would you agree with that or is there something else?
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, that's gotta be it. Because even last year I felt like for one game Stafford could play as well as any quarterback in the NFL. But now as we're looking at it, to get through an 18 game schedule, a 17 game schedule and then the playoffs, I can't get there. And at his age and the other thing I look at with him is like they almost were willing to trade him or let him go this off season. Like they have more information on his medicals than anybody else and if they were like no, no, he's great, you know, then would they have really taken taking that step now? Ultimately, maybe it's just a negotiating thing and he comes back, but that made me a little nervous as well. Where it's like Sean McVeigh at this point is like willing to let Matthew Stafford go here. Should that make my ears perk up a little bit?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, it would be like the Sixers. Oh no, they did the opposite. They just paid Joel Embiid and gave him a ton of money not knowing if he was able to walk. I have not figured out who my zag team in the in the NFC is. House loves the packers and I'm trying to figure out that case. And Jordan love being hurt last year, who are about to talk about him and the QB pyramid and playing hurt the whole year and obviously wasn't 100%. They tried to beef up the receivers. They have a young team. It's another year. It was a little bit year from heli for them last year, but I can't totally get there, can you?
Shield Kapadia
I like the Packers. I'm with House.
Bill Simmons
You like them as a zag team?
Shield Kapadia
I like them as a zag team. I think if I had to name three teams that you know to get to the super bowl and in the nfc, definitely four There. In there. I think. I think the case is Jordan Love at three different injuries last year, and they still had a top five offense. And then Matt LaFleur might be the most underrated coach in the NFL. I mean, you look at those last days of Aaron Rodgers were probably harder. You know, looking back now that they were probably a little bit harder than we gave them credit for. They transitioned to Jordan Love, and they just don't have bad seasons. I mean, they've been in the playoffs five or six seasons with him. He's won 67% of his games. They had a very young roster last year, like you mentioned. So if just some of those guys get better this year, I do think there's a case for the Packers.
Bill Simmons
Okay. All right. We're doing the quarterback pyramid, which I've been working on for a while. I. I have a. I have this as in pencil, but it's not in pen. And I'm willing to be nudged by you. You're gonna be my conciliary for this.
Shield Kapadia
All right.
Bill Simmons
So one thing I already. I already did with this. Normally with the pyramid, I have the one guy in the top, then two guys underneath him, then three, then four. So it's really a top 10. And it's 1, 2, 3, 4. I couldn't do the second level with two guys because there's four guys that clearly stand out above everybody else. And the four guys are. I'll just go alphabetical order. Josh Allen, Joe Burrow, Lamar Jackson, and Patrick Mahomes. So I made the second. I did a 1, 3, 4. So I had to beef out the second level of the pyramid a little. But do you agree with that? Like, how do you. How do you pick three out of those four guys? I just couldn't do it.
Shield Kapadia
I like it. Yeah, I think Burrow belongs there. I think some people might look at it and say, hey, he had the other three guys have all won MVPs. He hasn't won an MVP, but I put him right there with those three guys. It would have been weird to me if you had Burrows on, like, the next line with some of the other guys we talked about. So I was trying. When you sent it to me, I was trying to do the math. Like, wait a minute, how many guys are in each row? So I'm glad you. You explained this before people see the graphic.
Bill Simmons
It's the only time I can remember doing that. But I just, like, really? Burrow's going to be a level below those guys. That's crazy. He was unbelievable last year okay, so we're going to go through some of the choices, but the big one for me, and. And I thought about it long and hard, and I'd like to think that I am relatively thoughtful with this stuff and not quick, baity. I did not have Patrick Mahomes at the top of the pyramid, and I just couldn't get there with it. And I looked and I stared and I tried to make excuses left and right, and I just. When it came right down to it, I just think Josh Allen's the best quarterback in the league, game by game. Regular season durability, the fact that he doesn't. He had 14 sacks last year. You basically either can't sack him or he gets to where he runs away. He can make chicken salad out of chicken shit. Physically, he's dominant. I don't blame him for them not winning last year. I feel like he's gotten them right in the spot. Even when you think of that overtime game last year that they lost, like, the 13 seconds game, he did everything he could. I just think he's the best guy in the league now. In four months, Mahomes might grab it back, but from what we saw from Mahomes last year, which I want to go into in a second, I just don't think it's fair to put him over Josh Allen, especially because Mahomes didn't win the super bowl last year. So when you saw that, what was your reaction?
Shield Kapadia
My first reaction was, I thought, this goes against everything I thought I knew about you in terms of, honestly, from having, you know, read you, listened to you, working with you, talked to you. I thought you had sort of a life principle that when one guy has the belt, somebody's got to come take the belt. It's not just like, oh, the belt's on the ground. And Allen. I love Alan. Like, I actually think there is a case to what you're. You're saying that it's. It's hard to be like, oh, Mahomes does this better than Allen. Allen's a better runner. Josh Allen's awesome. I think it's a. We're talking about a very slim margin between the two. However, if it is that close and Patrick Mahomes has been to five Super Bowls, 1, 3 has played Josh Allen four times in the playoffs and beat him. Every time I hear what you're saying, those aren't Josh Allen's fault. I totally agree with that. But still, somebody wins, somebody loses. That sport. I feel like Allen needs to either beat Mahomes and get to a Super bowl or just win a Super bowl to actually get the belt. So I think the argument is fine and the conversation's fine. But I think if we're talking about actually to actually get the belt, I'm not giving. I think it's still. Patrick Mahomes is. I mean his down season was 15 and 2. Got to the super bowl with a terrible offensive line and a terrible supporting cast. And it's just the floor with terrible.
Bill Simmons
Like the Patriots had a terrible offensive line. Was. But was Mahomes his line terrible or did. Was it terrible against the Eagles? I mean I know he didn't have a left tackle at the end of last year and you know shit happens when you're a quarterback. Nothing gets to be perfect every single season. I just thought so. In 2022 he threw for 52, 50 passing yards, 41 touchdowns, 12 interceptions that dropped 1300 yards last year. Now he played one last game, but it was down in 26 TDs. 11. All his stats are down, the rushing stats are down. I guess my question is, is it possible that he might have peaked a couple of years ago as like Apex Mahomes? I'm just, I'm talking through it. I'm not trying to be reactionary guy. I just don't think he was as good last year as he was in that 22 season and some of those other years I didn't see it. I thought they, I thought they kind of looked at or 11 and 1 and 1 score games and some of them were really stupid wins. I never felt like he had the same command. I didn't think he moved the same way. I know his offensive line wasn't good, but I also thought he wasn't moving like he used to. And I don't know, I just. And I thought the Eagles killed him.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, I personally don't assign, I assign almost no blame to Mahomes for what has happened to the Chiefs offense. If I were a Chiefs fan, I would be furious at sort of the roster building and they've tried stuff. It's not that they haven't tried stuff, but it's like, I mean they had four different left tackles last year and they had Xavier Worthy, DeAndre Hopkins, 34 year old Travis Kelsey. I mean I do think there's a case that if you swap Josh Allen with Patrick Mahomes that the Chiefs offense might have been better because of Allen and the running element. I do think that's a big deal that Mahomes can scramble, but Josh Allen, you can use as a designed runner. And I do think that's a factor in terms of just building an offense that might not have a lot of good pieces. He can make up for that. But, man, I look at it and I'm just like, we make excuses for so many quarterbacks, and this guy didn't have a play caller, and this guy's. And I just look at what I. I don't think it was good last year. I mean, I have a hard time thinking that many quarterbacks could have gotten them better than whatever they were, like, eighth in offensive DVOA with the rookie wide receiver who couldn't stay in bounds with a rotating cast at left tackle. I mean, they've kind of. I hate what they've done to Patrick Mahomes. You. You gave the numbers. It's like we watched this guy and he was bombing it downfield and he had a rocket of an arm, and he was the most fun guy ever to watch. And now they're throwing it six yards because they can't come up with anything else because they don't have the talent around him. So that's where I'm at with Mahomes. I don't put. I put pretty much nothing on him. Now. Other people might disagree, but that's kind of how I see this.
Bill Simmons
Typical trophy generation performer parenting by you. You made the key point. And this is why I put Alan in that top spot. If you switch them last season, the Chiefs would have been better with that version of Allen last season versus what they had with Mahomes. And I've heard all the excuses, by the way. I'm the one who just picked Mahomes blindly every week and all the way through the Super Bowl. I had no other reason. I thought the Eagles were better. I'm like, I'm not going against my homes. So I say that knowing that I was that person nine months ago. I just keep looking at the Josh Allen piece, and we're not making the same kind of excuses for him because the team performs no matter what happens. Like, who were his. Who were his people last year? James Cook was good, right? But, like, when you look at the receivers that he had, it's not like Keon Coleman was going nuts. He had Shakir. They went and they. They traded for Amari Cooper during the season. That didn't really do anything. I thought Schultz was. He not. Not Schultz.
Shield Kapadia
The Knox.
Bill Simmons
Knox Kincaid. Yeah, I was getting my Daltons confused.
Shield Kapadia
White tight ends. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. No, the. The tight ends were okay, but I. But for where they were in Fantasy before the year when we were like, oh my God, these weapons. I don't know, I just felt like he was a one man show in a lot of ways. And as a Pats fan, I just am the most or betting, betting against the quarterback. I was the most afraid going against him last year. I always felt like he was going to make a play. Some of the stuff with his. So he had in the last two years 27 Rush TDs, but he had 109 first downs running. Yeah. And normally QBs are between like 20 and 30. This guy's getting, I don't know, basically three, four running, three, four running first downs a game. And if it's a big playoff game, maybe five. And that's the piece. I just think I thought they should have won last year. I keep coming back to that. Like I don't know if the right team won last year.
Shield Kapadia
He's the most efficient runner in the NFL and has been for like the last three years. Like when he either chooses to run on a scramble or on a designed run run, it's pretty much unstoppable. I do think that's a case for him. I think, I think the best point you made is probably if you're an opposing fan right now and which quarterback are you most afraid of in a playoff game? I, I think there's a case for, yeah, it might be Josh Allen. Now I don't like making arguments against Josh Allen because I do think it's, I do think it's flip a coin and I'm basically just saying the tiebreaker goes to the guy who's won more. But they had a top five offensive line I would say last year, and it stayed very healthy. So I, I feel like the great quarterbacks can overcome either the average offensive line or like the bad supporting cast. When you get both of them that are bad, sometimes you're kind of just stuck and you, you know, you're like the eighth best offense instead of the second best offense.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, it's weird. This is uncharacteristic for me because normally I'm like a playoff pedigree wins. Somebody's got to take the belt from the guy. I don't know, man. I watched every, I watched everything last year and I just felt like Josh, when you look at the totality of what he did, looking back versus the mystique of Mahomes versus what actually happened and the fact that he was able to turn it on right when they needed it, but just quarter by quarter, I don't know how you would say anyone's better than Josh. I mean, the only other guy statistically that has a case is Lamar, who last year was 41 and 4. Four interceptions. He ran for 915 yards. He had 47 rushing, TDs, first downs, threw for over 4,000. But the playoff resume just kills him. Like that's one where you can't discuss him for the top because he just had. We haven't seen him do it, Josh. It's like we haven't seen him 100% do it either. But I also feel like two of those wins, I can't really hang on him.
Shield Kapadia
I think that's right. If you look at Josh, if you look at the Bill's playoff losses, Josh Allen has played like 95th percentile games statistically where their, their defense has just let them down. Every single year in the playoffs they get carved up by Burrow or Mahomes or whoever it is. And yes, you can make the case that not everything in the playoffs has been Lamar Jackson, but I do think you can say it hasn't been quite as flawless. You know, he has made mistakes here and there and then just the physicality of it, where Lamar Jackson has stayed healthy, but earlier in his career he had seasons where he missed five games. And Josh Allen's kind of like what you always talk about with LeBron where it's just, it would just be shocking if like Josh Allen went down and didn't get up and you're like, oh my, Josh Allen's out for a month. Like, wait, I thought he was indestructible, right?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah, the man. I mean, now I'm think the more I'm thinking about it, like they did have the ball with a chance to put away the Chiefs last year. They did and they didn't do it. And that's at least partly on him, even though, you know, whatever. But, and I remember saying that at the time, it was like, if you're going to, if you're going to take it from Mahomes, this is your chance. You have the ball, you can finish them right here. And they didn't. But I don't know how you could have Mahomes first after the start to finish year he had last year. Unless you're going to tell me the offensive line was that bad, because the other piece with Mahomes, the infrastructure of that read the play calling, like just the stability they've always had there, I think that really matters, you know, and that's something that some quarterbacks, you know, they might have 10 years where they don't have anything like that. So I know he didn't have a left tackle. He's going to have a left tackle this year because by all accounts that first rounder they took, that feels like that's probably the biggest draft pick storyline, right? That they have like a real kick ass left tackle that crossed their fingers that they took basically at the end of the first round. He's going to kick ass for them.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, if it works out. That's a, that's a huge, huge deal in the afc. Now they're swinging another guy into guard because they traded Joe Toney. And so I'm always skeptical with the rookies in like the August reports where this guy looks great and I'm just like, let me, you know, because I was, I was doing a bunch of like statistical research on this and like 35 to 40% of first round picks won't even start eight games this year. You know, and like everybody gets so excited in August that oh my God, they solved their, you know, you look at a weakness and you say, oh, they solved their problem with this guy. And it's like a lot of, almost half the guys aren't even going to play. So yeah, I need to see it the first month of the season. But I'm with you. That is a huge pick that could kind of swing things in the afc.
Bill Simmons
All right, so my conciliary disagrees. I'm going to keep Allen in the top spot and I'm going to say this to Patrick Mahomes, prove to me I'm a shithead. Go take your belt back. You dropped the belt. You dropped the belt in that super bowl game. And just in general, I didn't love the season start to finish and I think Josh is a safer bet. So prove to me I'm wrong. We'll take a break. We'll go through the rest of the pyramid. Tuesday, August 26th. Guess what that is? FanDuel Futures Day. It's a new holiday for football fans. I mean, honestly, my entire summer is futures day, but let's Designate it Tuesday, August 26th. 24 hours of deals on your football season predictions. Take a fire on the MVP race. Mahomes comeback year. Josh Allen, maybe you go rogue. Joe Burrow, crown your champion in August. I like an Eagles Broncos Super Bowl. I think it's like 60 to 1. Maybe do a little super bowl matchup. Division winner Dark horses Denver over 3 to 1. Still mark your calendars. This is your day for your hunches. Your hot takes, your calls, your odds. We're going to have some special bets on there as well. Visit the FanDuel app today and start planning your future bets now. Because Futures day is one day and one day only. FanDuel play. Your game must be 21 plus in President select states or 18 plus in President DC, Kentucky or Wyoming. Game problem. Call 100 Gamble or visit rg-help.com, call 1-887-897777 or visit ccpg.org chat in Connecticut this episode is brought to you by LinkedIn. As a small business owner, you don't have the luxury of clocking out early. Your business is on your mind 24 7. So when you're hiring, you need a partner that works just as hard as you do. That hiring partner is LinkedIn jobs when you clock out, LinkedIn clocks in. LinkedIn's new feature can help you write job descriptions and then quickly get your job in front of the right people with deep candidate insights. Nice. At the end of the day, the most important thing to your small business is the quality of candidates. And with LinkedIn you can feel confident you're getting the best. You can even add a hashtag hiring frame to your profile picture and get two times more qualified candidates. Post your job for free@LinkedIn.com Simmons terms and conditions apply. And now it's time for rules and tips to winning your league. A new segment presented by Yahoo. Fantasy the most fun place to play fantasy football this season. I'm the perfect guy to ask since I haven't won my Knockout League since 2007. Yahoo. Fantasy dropping over 28 new features over 28 days through August. Like Guillotines, which is an awesome way to play. I was in one of those leagues last year. It was great. Whether you're a season pro or last minute joiner, there are a few things you'll want to know before the season kicks off. Number one, find that rookie receiver who's going to be awesome. Just try to lock it down. Brian Thomas Jr. Was the guy last year. Just go in, lock it down. Make sure you get a quarterback everyone. Like there was this new shift where it was like no, quarterbacks don't matter as much. Guess what? Look at the total points. Quarterbacks matter. Get a good quarterback. Don't mess around. And then don't draft guys from your own team if you can avoid it because it's like a double whammy if something terrible happens to them. So those are my thoughts. Stay tuned for more killer announcements and start playing Yahoo Fantasy football@yahoo. Fantasy.com Simmons and try a guillotine league. They're cool. All right, so the top four, Allen at the top, then Lamar and Mahomes and Burrow all together, that next tier of the pyramid, which is four guys. So I settled on these four. Jaden Daniels, Jordan Love, Dak Prescott, and Jalen Hurts, who doesn't belong in that night. So we are now talking about guys five through eight. So when somebody says he's a top 10 quarterback, my recommendation would be do this exercise because you'd be surprised that top 10 fills up pretty fast. Daniel's Love, Prescott Hurts. Do all these people belong in this level for you?
Shield Kapadia
I was most surprised that you had Dak Prescott in this. In this tier. I got it. I looked at it and I'm like, wait, did he send me the wrong thing? Not that I think people will make the case, but I think that's more of the, you know, the QB intellectuals, the hipsters, you know, you don't understand what Dak Prescott does. And I like Dak Prescott. I just feel like there is a case for other people in this tier. You know, I think last year everyone points to, Hey, 2023. Dak Prescott was an MVP candidate and he was awesome that year. He did start eight games last year, and he kind of sucked. I mean, their offense was terrible last year for eight games, and now he's 32 years old coming off of an injury. So they generally win a lot of games. He plays well, and their offense is good when they have Dak Prescott healthy. But I was, I have to say, of the four guys in there, I was surprised by him. And I was also surprised you had Jordan Love in there. I'm a big Jordan, but I thought you would say, let's see a little bit more. He didn't have a great year last season. Maybe one of these other guys belongs in there. So I had like three or four names where I thought, I wonder how closely you looked at putting these guys in that tier.
Bill Simmons
I had a lot of trouble once we. I mean, to me, the. The. The two that were definitely in there, that had to be in there were Hertz and Daniels. Love was unquestionably hurt basically the whole season and just seemed to have like a little bit of the year from hell and. And fought through it. Not to mention, I thought his receivers, you know, for what we thought that receiving core was going to be. And then even Luke Musgrave thought he. And then it turned out Tucker Kraft was the guy. I don't know There's. And the smart football people, as we head toward the season, have all targeted him as, like. No, no, no. If you actually watch the tape. And I, I, at some point, I trust that a little bit that there's a lot more there. And maybe last year was on the lower end of what it should have been. So that's. That's the case.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, I like Love. I mean, like you said, dealt with three injuries. I think his receivers were among the league leaders in drops. And still, you know, what if they got hurt?
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Shield Kapadia
And they still won, what, 11 games or whatever and had a top five offense. So. Yeah, I like having Love in there. I was just surprised you had him in there. But the guys who I was, I, I wrote down here where I thought you could replace Dak Prescott with. I had four names written down.
Bill Simmons
Okay. I wonder if there are the four names that are in the next level.
Shield Kapadia
Three of them are in the next level. One of them's in the level below the next level.
Bill Simmons
Okay, you want to know? How about. No, let me go through. And when we go to that next level, man, you're really like. I thought I was, like, being fair with Dak. Cause I'm not, as you know, I'm not like a Giant fan. But I went. I mean, I went back to his 03 season or 23 season. 36 touchdowns, nine picks. He threw for 45, 16, went 12 and five. I didn't even necessarily think the team was that good. And then last year was a little year from Hellish. And, you know, I thought their offensive line wasn't good and they had one receiver. They threw away the running back position for reasons that remain unclear. So. And then he got hurt. So I don't know, is that his fault or is that everybody, everything else's fault?
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, I think he's. He's in the mix there. I don't think you're wrong to have him on this row. I think there are arguments for some other guys, but you're right. When he plays, they're 76 and 46. They're 30 games over.500 when he's on the field, which I think would probably surprise people. You know, they won 12 games three years in a row. We'll see what it looks like this year. Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Want him for four playoff rounds? Probably not. I though, here's the guy. As we get to this next level, I really looked at Mayfield. I loved how Mayfield played last year. And Mayfield was 4,500 yards last year. 41 touchdowns, 16 picks. He'll throw the ball for grabs once a game, maybe twice. But from a leadership standpoint, I just think as a culture guy, I just like him. I think the Browns giving up on him because he had a bad shoulder, that one year is almost as dumb as the Watson thing. So that was the one guy I was looking at. Who were your three guys you were looking at in the next level? Because the next. I'll give you the next level. Mayfield, Purdy, Stafford, Stroud and Goff. So who'd you have?
Shield Kapadia
I think it's going to surprise you. Probably the three guys I had. I thought you could make a case for Purdy that he belongs in there. Honestly, like, I learned more about Purdy last year than maybe I did in previous years. They were the most injured offense in the NFL. They couldn't do all the Shanahan, you know, tricks and gimmicks that they want to do because they didn't have the personnel. And I don't think they were bad last year because of the offense. I think they were. They had one of the worst special teams in the NFL. The defense was bad and they had injuries on offense. I thought Purdy did, actually did a pretty good job elevating some of the talent around him so, you know, you can get to a Super bowl with him. And I thought we learned last year that, hey, the floor actually isn't that low. I mean, they were ninth in offensive efficiency last year and he was dealing with a shoulder injury. Like if you look at his numbers before the shoulder injury, I think it was week 10, week 12 or whatever. I mean he was playing really well and then he finished slow and then he got injured to end the season. But yeah, I know not everybody is a Purdy guy, but I thought he deserved maybe a mention for, for one tier above. So that was one guy I had Stroud.
Bill Simmons
Hold on. I'm Purdy. Yeah, I mean he almost stood for 4,000 yards last year. They lose Iuk what, five games into the season, his the first round pick gets shot before the season. Pierce all McAffrey plays barely any games. They're down to like their third stream running back. The line was a mess. Yeah, they were the classic all time year from hell season. I had the same thought like there, you know, he had two terrible games. I remember Purdy, but for the most part it felt like he was hanging around. I think that the best case for him, he can extend plays, right? He had 33 rushing first downs last year. But in general, like I can move around and buy two seconds But I think he throws one of the best deep balls in the league, you know, and if the weapons can. I don't know what they think. They seem to think I. You can come back at some point soon. I'm a little dubious that injury happened in October, but we'll see. Diggs is coming back, too, but yeah, I like him, too. I. Both him and Mayfield, like, if that's your quarterback, I'm just not bummed out. I like those guys.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah. He reminds me of Romo, I think is still the guy who I'm like, when I look at Purdy, like, he's. He's probably not as talented or might not have the same arm, but just kind of the way he plays, it feels like you're going to complete passes and hit on explosive plays and give your offense a chance.
Bill Simmons
All right, so Stroud, you thought. Could have made a case for that higher level.
Shield Kapadia
Could have made a case. I understand why he didn't. I still think he's really good, but last year I think he did develop some bad habits. But if you're asking me like Stroud or Prescott, if I just am an NFL owner and you're like, hey, you get your chance at one of these two quarterbacks this year, I might be tempted to go with Stroud, everything else being equal there. So he probably needs to do it a little bit longer. I understand why you would have Prescott above him. And then the last guy, he just never. It's always his coach gets all the credit and he doesn't get the credit. And maybe I'm. I've just in my old age turned into a QB apologist. But like Jared Goff, I mean, wow, it's. First it's Sean McVay, then it's Ben Johnson, and it's like for five of his seven seasons or whatever, he's quarterbacked a really good offense. And so I just thought, you know, I don't know if you put Jared Goff into that Cowboys offense instead of Dak Prescott. I don't know. Maybe there's a smaller margin there than people would expect, but I think I would have Prescott ahead of him.
Bill Simmons
I did examine the golf candidacy, and his last three years, when you look at them all together, are kind of shocking. He goes 44, 45 and 4,600 each year, 29, 30 and 37 touchdowns. Never throws more than 12 picks. It was just better than I was expecting. But we're going to find out about him this year. Yes, no Ben Johnson, the offensive lines, definitely, definitely worse. Schedule is Going to be harder. Like, we will know this year. We'll know. We'll know what's in there once and for all. But you're right, he could be the guy. So, all right, you've convinced me to bump Dak. I think I was being too generous with him. So if it goes Allen, then Lamar Mahomes Burrow and then Daniels. Love hurts. You think that fourth guy should be who? Not Mayfield. Huh?
Shield Kapadia
It might be a guy in your next tier. You want to get to your next row there.
Bill Simmons
If you say Justin Herbert, I'm hanging up. It better not be Justin Herbert.
Shield Kapadia
All right.
Bill Simmons
Don't do it.
Shield Kapadia
All right. No, I know. I don't want.
Bill Simmons
Are you going to say Justin Herbert?
Shield Kapadia
I think he has to be in the conversation for the.
Bill Simmons
Oh, my God. Why? All right, what is happening?
Shield Kapadia
Listen, I'm trying to bring Justin Herbert. I'm trying to bring a rational Justin Herbert. Take here. You know, you have the Herbert hipsters who, if you don't have him as, like, the greatest quarterback in the NFL, they get all upset. But this is too. This is too low for him. I think it is. Why is it too low where you have him? I don't. You think if the Cowboys had their choice of Zach Prescott or Justin Herbert this year, they would take Justin Herbert?
Bill Simmons
Would they?
Shield Kapadia
I think so. I think so.
Bill Simmons
Let me give you some. Just let me give you.
Shield Kapadia
I love this.
Bill Simmons
So I had so level four. I had Mayfield, Purdy, Stafford, Stroud and Goff.
Kevin Wilds
And.
Bill Simmons
And I, by the way, quickly on Stroud, I just thought he. I just didn't think he was as good last year in every respect as he was the year before. And I. Especially against shitty teams. They were just games where you'd have them on and their offense just looked like shit. And he. I don't know what he was doing. I know he had receiver injuries. I know they weren't totally happy with their O line, but I just. I didn't like how he played Herbert last year. 23 touchdowns, three picks. Really impressive. Took 41 sacks. I think they had a top five offensive line last year. So explain that to me. Almost three for 4,000 yards. Here's the thing with Herbert and all the Herbert apologists have not been able to explain this part. They played a cream puff schedule last year. They played four really good defenses. Pittsburgh, Baltimore and Kansas City. Twice they scored 60 points in the four games total. 60 points in the playoffs. Houston, another good defense, 12 points anytime the defense was good. He looked like crap and couldn't do anything. And nobody has been able to provide a proper explanation for that. If the defense is good, he's not good. And it's like, well, they don't have enough skill, guys. Oh, that, like, what is it? At some point we have to see something from him and we just haven't seen it.
Shield Kapadia
I'm with you. Honestly, in most of my conversations with the, with other, you know, football analysts, I'm the guy making the points you're making and they're like, no, you know, what can he do? He's got the arm, he's got the athleticism, he makes good decisions. At some point, I'm with you. You have to have a moment. You have to, it has to all come together. You have to have a playoff win five years into the NFL. So I'm not irrational about Justin Herbert where I'm like, he's incredible. You know, I think all the points you make are absolutely valid. And I do wonder if he's going to have sort of a Stafford type career where we're going to have like 8, 9, 10 years where everyone's like, this guy's arm. And oh my gosh, look at this throw. And there just hasn't been a single meaningful moment for him in the playoffs until maybe there's kind of a late stage part of his career. So I'm with you there. I do think if I were an expansion team and I got my choice of any quarterback and I'm ranking them right now, I would have him higher on this list above some of the guys you have above him. So that would be my case for him, is that I'm with you. It hasn't all come together. I've been underwhelmed. I loved him in his first season, his second season. I thought he was going to have accomplished a lot more at this point that he hasn't accomplished. But I still think there is a good player in there that I don't know when we'll see. See the results.
Bill Simmons
There's not. I just, that's he's being, he's being put on this level that we just haven't seen against the, against really good teams, which is part of being an awesome quarterback. It's like, can you. Lawrence has the same issue and we're not even close to getting to Lawrence yet. But it's like, at some point, let's see it. Yeah, let's stop making excuses. This year. It's like, Slater's already out, right? Oh, Slater's out. And so if he's not doing well against, well they don't have Slater, that's why. And the runner, the rookie running back's not as good as they thought. And it'll just be another litany of excuses. By the way, I don't think a team was better equipped to lose their awesome left tackle than the Chargers, who could just take Joe Walt and take him from the right side and put him on the left side. It's not perfect, but no other team has the luxury of moving Joe Al into the starting left tackle. So I. It's an excuse, but it's not like a real excuse. They still should be fine. Like, they should. Like, you know, they. They improved their skill position. Guys, it's year two of Harbaugh, and I'm not accepting excuses for it. Like, let's see it.
Shield Kapadia
I think one of the big differentiators with these guys is, like, who can overcome a bad situation, A bad situation. And like, Jaden Daniels. If you go back and look at what we were all thinking about that commander situation going into last year, it was like, offensive line bad. Terry McLaren. And that's all he's got. And they had, what, the fifth best offense in the NFL and he got to the NFC Championship game. So I think it's fair. I mean, Herbert picks. They've had one top 10 offense in five years with him as the quarterback. And there's. It's hard to get around that when it's like three different offensive coordinators, different coaching staffs, different supporting casts. At some point, if you're going to talk about a quarterback in a certain level, they have to be able to overcome some of the issues around him. And there probably hasn't been enough of that with him.
Bill Simmons
I'd rather have Purdy. Prescott's just done more. Stafford won a Super Bowl. Stroud vs. Herbert's an interesting conversation. Yeah. And Goff has been really good and has been on the cusp of making the Super Bowl. I feel good about having him in the fifth level here. I still gotta figure out, so Daniel's love hurts. I think I'm just putting Mayfield. Like, why not? Mayfield's had good moments. I know you like Mayfield a little bit. Is it my fun to put Purdy in that?
Shield Kapadia
I like Purdy, but.
Bill Simmons
All right, fine. I'll put Purdy there. I'll put Mayfield. This is why you're my conciliary. Yeah. Purdy pretty came made the Super Bowl. It's more than Justin Herbert could say. All right, so that next level, Justin Herbert, Sam Darnold, who now is, like, being discussed like he's, you know, the, the, the 11th reliever on a, on a 82 win National League team. Drake May, Bo Nix, Gino Smith and Kyler Murray would be my level, the level five pyramid guys. Kyler is the one statistically that you could get more excited about. But I'm sorry, I, I have league, I, I have a Sunday ticket and I watch football and I just. That he is who he is. Like he's nine games under.500 as a first career and I just, I don't know. Yeah, I do not see somebody that elevates the team.
Shield Kapadia
I feel like I know how every Kyler Murray season's going to go. You know, there's going to be some flashes in September, in October. Someone's going to make the case that he's playing as well as any quarterback in the NFL. There's going to be some fun highlights and then you're going to get to the end of the season and they're going to be like nine and eight and their offense has never been in the top eight.
Bill Simmons
That would be a miracle.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, that would be, that would be a good one. So, yes, there is like, there are flashes there, but like Herbert in a way, like you need to see a little bit more at this point. Where has the guy put it all together? So I don't have an issue with where you have him.
Bill Simmons
That's the lamelo ball guy out of the quarterbacks this year where it's like, you catch the red highlight package, he looks amazing. There's going to be a moment earlier in the season, we're like lamello ball. Whoa, here we go. And then you look at the record. At the end of the year, I had trouble with May versus Knicks. And as you know, I love Drake May. I do think we're putting a lot on him this year. And he's going to have two plays a game. We were like, he had one in the preseason game, which for the first time ever, shield I paid for the preseason package.
Kevin Wilds
Wow.
Bill Simmons
I normally hate the preseason, but I was like, I got to see these rookies. I shelled out my $14 and I watched the first three quarters of the Pats and, and Drake May, of course had his one dumb. Drake May held onto the ball through it, basically fumbled. But I think, I don't think people understand how bad his offensive line skill, position, coaching situation was last year where it was an F minus at receiver, at offensive line and at coaching. And now the receivers, they at least have some speed. Henderson in the backfield, it looks like, he's Jameer Gibbs on freaking steroids. And then, and then he has a whole new offensive line and Vrabo and I just, I think he's going to be good if they can keep him on the field. The big worry for me with him is just taking hits.
Shield Kapadia
He's. Don't take this the wrong way. I don't want to scare you because I like Drake May. He's got a little young Carson Wentz to his game. Remember when Carson Wentz was good? You know, when Carson Wentz was good, you know, MVP candidate and you saw the highs. But there would be a couple plays every game where you're like, dude, like, you have to stay on the field. Don't do that. He's got a little bit of that. But I have a Drake May stat you're going to love. I don't think I've mentioned this to you before. There's this stat I like called success rate. All it looks at is when a guy drops back, was it a positive play for the offense or a negative play? So it's like a 50 yard completion is treated the same as a 12 yard completion, but it's just good for, like, how consistent is this guy? If you look at every rookie quarterback over the last 10 years, he ranks fourth out of 31 rookie quarterbacks in success rate last year. So, like that, that's pretty impressive when like it's C.J. stroud's up there, Dak Prescott's up there. Like, there are good quarterbacks there and his highs are very high where, like those 1% plays where you're like eight, 10 quarterbacks in the NFL can do that. He's got that. It's kind of like he just has to get those. Like you mentioned, those two, three, four, five plays where either he's getting crushed or he's making a bad decision or it could be a turnover. Like coaching that out of him to me is going to be the key as to whether he just makes like a okay leap or like a leap where we're talking about him as one of the guys by the end of the season.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, the Pats looked awesome on Friday night and they interviewed Variable at halftime. And then after the game and he did the Belichick thing where he was like, man, we look great. I hope we can play. Like, he's just like, yeah, I didn't love this. And, and he specifically just kept mentioning the May thing. He's like, he's got to be better.
Kevin Wilds
He.
Bill Simmons
He can't do that. So I Think they're going to be coaching him hard. I don't think people realize how fast he is and, and what his legs are and how. Especially if there's actually guys out there making plays who have to be covered and the field opens up. They ran one play in the preseason where they did the classic video game play of they sent the receivers out and cleared out a side of the field and he ran and it's just like he's, he's an unbelievable athlete. Yeah. Could he be like mini Josh Allen someday? I don't know. But I think they're going to be taking advantage of the legs. So anyway, Knicks was the other one. Knicks had 41 first downs last year just with his legs, 29 TDs, 12 picks. He ran for 430 yards. He's in year two. The, that team, I think is, as you know, I'm all in on that team. I think that team's going to be really good. And the fact that the Chargers have already had, you know, have had a major offensive line injury, the Raiders have already lost Christian Wilkins, like, it just feels like they're solidified as the second team in that thing. But Knicks was somebody that I feel like if anyone could climb out of this level and jump up a notch, it's going to be May or Knicks, in my opinion. Do you think Knicks has another gear or no?
Shield Kapadia
That is the question because I feel like he's high floor and he proved his competency last year. But if you really look at it, last year his superpower was avoiding negative plays. Like he didn't take sacks. Like you just mentioned, he'll scramble. He didn't turn the football over and it wasn't lucky. Like, if you look at the advanced numbers about, you know, turnover worthy plays, like, he did a very good job. Sean Payton in his ear of like, do not create negative plays live to see the next down. So you have that. I think it establishes a high floor. And now I wonder, is there another gear where. Because if the other thing is like when he was pressured, when opponents knew he had to throw the ball, those kinds of things, he wasn't as good in those situations where you really need the quarterback to kind of carry you and everyone knows you have to pass the ball. So that's the next step. And I think he might like, I liked what I saw. I'm not, you know, I wouldn't plant my flag on it and be like, he's definitely going to take a step forward. I think I. The most likely scenario is maybe he's a little bit better, but they're still maybe in that 10 to 15 range in terms of offenses. But if he can get them a little bit higher, then it goes to what you're saying that they, they could be a surprise team.
Bill Simmons
Next level is Penix Lawrence, Caleb tua, Bryce Young, J.J. mcCarthy. God only knows what's going to happen with him. I'm not accepting any shit for the Lawrence being in that level. I. I just like, Give me a break. He's 22 and 38 in his career. His last two years, he's played 26 games, 32 touchdowns, 21 picks, 15 fumbles. Doesn't use his legs really like the way we thought he might in college, and we haven't seen him elevate teams. He throws. Does anyone throw more hospital balls than him? He did one in the fucking preseason game. I just don't. I don't see it. And I don't know if being in a losing situation with all the turmoil and different coaches, I don't know if that was bad for him, but I'd be really surprised if he was able to elevate himself into like one of those top four tiers. Have you given up on him or you still feel like there's hope?
Shield Kapadia
I. I think there's a chance, but I'm not like I see it. You know, I don't think this is an outrage. I think it's fine to have him here. You know, I think if you look at his last three seasons, one terrible season, one mediocre season, and then 20, 22, I thought he was pretty good. So it wouldn't shock me if he settles into kind of average. Hey, if the situation around him is good, you know, he can have a good year. But I'm with you just in terms of some of the stuff we saw last year, the bad habits, the inability to overcome some of the things around him. Now, I will say, like, I forget, who were you? You said with Goff, we're going to learn more about him this year. Shouldn't we learn a lot about Trevor Lawrence? If Liam Cohen can get that year out of Baker Mayfield last year. Now, I know the Jags offensive line isn't as good as Tampa's was last year, but still, like, there was a scheme there where the coach looked at the quarterback and said, I can build to your strengths and we can have one of the better offenses in the NFL. I feel like you should be able to do that with Brian Thomas Jr. And Travis Hunter and Trevor Lawrence. So I do think and you know, we've probably said this in previous years, but. But we should learn a little bit more about Trevor Lawrence this year.
Bill Simmons
You underrated how bad that Jacksonville offensive line might be. Yeah, they might be like legit bad. They might be a bottom. I, I have them in the bottom five. Thomas was a revelation though.
Shield Kapadia
He's awesome.
Bill Simmons
He has to be one of the six, seven, eight most impactful receivers. So at least he has that. We'll see. With Hunter. I have no idea. The Hunter thing, Anyone who can say they're going to predict that is nuts. All right. And then the last level of the pyramid is the bottom level and it's Cam Ward, Fields, Rogers, Russ Wilson is the last human QB before we get to indie question mark, New Orleans question mark and then Cleveland question mark. And I am not spending two seconds talking about shoulder. Sanders looking good in a preseason game against third stringers. I, I'm rooting for him because it would be more fun if he's good. But let's all settle down. We can't all pretend or we can't all say preseason doesn't matter and then overreact when somebody does want a preseason game. So anyway, Cam Ward, what if he's good now? There's some offensive line stuff working against him. There's some scope position stuff working against him that I wouldn't say it's the best coaching situation, but there is like some good buzz coming out about just like, hey, this guy's. What if he's good? Like could. Is there any possibility that he could be Stroud two years ago or Daniels last year?
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, it's. It's probably the hardest thing in the NFL to predict is which rookie quarterback's going to be good. I mean it just last year with Daniels, the year before with Stroud, maybe like one person on an island said it, but you, you usually have no idea. I think the thing he has working for him is they did build up that offensive line where it should. It's going to give him a chance. Like it might not be a top five unit, but it's not going to be a situation at least I don't think where we're looking at it going, man, he's getting sacked six times a game and is a disaster now. Supporting cast isn't great. I'm with you on the coach. Like, I don't know, like we'll see with it. With Brian Callahan, it's just sort of the least talked about coach in the NFL.
Bill Simmons
But there's some Will Leva stuff. Last year with him, that just seems, uh. I. It may just made me question. Question the judgment.
Shield Kapadia
Totally agree.
Bill Simmons
It's like, what do you. Cause they were gay. It felt like they would hang around in some of those games and then it was like just mismanagement. Terrible quarterback play, something really stupid happening at some point. That's a little bit the coach. I don't know. Yeah.
Shield Kapadia
Terrible special teams, which is always. I look at that and go, what's the head coach doing here? If everything else sucks and the special team sucks, That's a red flag too. But yeah, like the, the, you know, the row above, you had Pennocks and you had J.J. mcCarthy. It's like a bunch of guys we don't really know a lot about. And our wild cards and Cam Ward probably fits in that same group right now.
Bill Simmons
So Tua I had, you know, as a level 5, like, you know, in the bottom 10, basically. And that is that. It's a. Mostly a durability thing. I just don't trust him to play four straight months. You can't. You don't want him running the ball at all. They have the worst short yardage stuff of the decade of anybody. And I think partly because everybody knows he's. There's no QB sneak, any sort of role at anything. They're just going to be like kid gloves with him. He can't stay on the field. And I think everything has to be specifically perfect for him to succeed. I've just never been a Giant fan of his. I don't know. You're kind of where I am on that one. Right?
Shield Kapadia
I'm with you. I did think there was a case to bump Darnold down one and replace him with Tua. If I. If I were more. Yeah, if I were more. I mean, they're 38 and 24 when Tua plays, and I know a lot of it's beating up on bad teams and everything you said is true durability. Concussion history. If they play a good team, I don't think they're going to be good. But I could also make the case that Darnold has had one year of above average quarterback play, and that was with Justin Jefferson, Kevin o'. Connell, like, I need to see more with Darnold. I think there's a. There's a. There's a team.
Bill Simmons
Three is pretty good.
Shield Kapadia
It's good. It's good. But it was one season. I think there's a chance he comes back down to earth, so I don't have an issue with it. Just because with the two you know, he's going to miss four games most seasons, but I did think there was at least a little bit of a case there that he could replace Darnold.
Bill Simmons
All right, so my finalist, Allen at the top, then Lamar Mahomesborough, then Daniel's love hurts. Purdy Shield, the conciliary stepping in. So that's a. That's the top eight. No, I'm fine with it. I think you're right. Mayfield, Prescott, Stafford, stroud. Golf sets 13. And then the next level starts with Herbert and weirdly drops off at that point from Darnold May, Nick's Gino Murray. It's Probably a top 14 with a drop off. So maybe you make a case Herbert goes up one level in that golf group just because it feels weird that he's on a level with Darnold May, Nick's Gino Murray. Whether you're a rubber guy or not.
Shield Kapadia
Yeah, I felt like maybe.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah. So maybe I could get a little creative with that level, move him up. So that would give me. This is some pyramid where it goes 1, 3, 4, 6. I'll figure it out. But most important, the last four going backwards. Cleveland with the worst quarterback situation league. Or would you. Would you have them leapfrogging New Orleans at this point? They probably leapfrog like Sanders might be better than anyone in New Orleans.
Shield Kapadia
I agree with that. I think the Saints are probably the worst.
Bill Simmons
All right, so we'll have the Saints last, which helps with all the unders and terrible Saints bets I have for them to suck. Cleveland second to last. And then Indy. God only knows Richardson already has gotten dinged up. Daniel Jones is on that team. And then Russ Wilson and Rogers. That's our bottom five. And Rogers. I just. I'm just stupefied by anyone thinking Rogers is going to be good on Pittsburgh. I don't get it. I've talked about it. I don't. You have takes on that or.
Kevin Wilds
No.
Shield Kapadia
The full list of quarterbacks age 42 or older that have just started 10 games in a season in the super bowl era. Want me to give it to you?
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Shield Kapadia
Tom Brady. That literally done. That's it. Nobody else has even started 10 games at this age. And then we saw what we saw last year. I'm with you. I don't know how you could be optimistic about that situation.
Bill Simmons
I didn't see any semblance of a guy who wanted to get hit when I watched the games last year. So there we go. All right. My conciliatory Sho Kapadia. We're here. It's football time. What's your favorite future bet you've made?
Shield Kapadia
I like the packers over. I think it's nine and a half for what we said earlier. Yeah, I think they're a 10 or 11 win team, so I think that's probably my favorite over right now.
Bill Simmons
I think my favorite bet so far. Well, I have a bunch of Broncos bets that I was all excited about, but my favorite one, Miami, Cleveland, the Giants and Tennessee. No playoffs plus 103.
Shield Kapadia
Yes. You put the Giants in there. I like it.
Bill Simmons
I did that when I was. Where was I in Chicago for one day and I jumped on Fando and I was like, I'm just jumping on this. If I had to say, who would screw that up? It's probably Tennessee. It just if Cam Ward is awesome and we're like, oh my God, Cam Ward's awesome, they're going to go nine and eight and sneak into the seventh seed, that would be the one I would be worried about. But that was my favorite. Yeah. All right, Shield, great to see you. Keep an eye on the ringer NFL show next couple weeks because we have some fun stuff brewing there. And in general, always great to see you.
Shield Kapadia
All right, good to see you. Talk to you soon.
Bill Simmons
Thanks. This episode is brought to you by LinkedIn. As a small business owner, you don't have the luxury of clocking out early. Your business is on your mind 24 7. So when you're hiring, you need a partner that works just as hard as you do. That hiring partner is LinkedIn Jobs. When you clock out, LinkedIn clocks in. LinkedIn's new feature can help you write job descriptions and then quickly get your job in front of the right people with deep candidate insights. Nice. At the end of the day, the most important thing to your small business is the quality of candidates. And with LinkedIn, you can feel confident you're getting the best. You can even add a hashtag hiring frame to your profile picture and get two times more qualified candidates. Post your job for free@LinkedIn.com Simmons terms and conditions apply. This episode is brought to you by Yahoo. Fantasy. It's my favorite time of the year. The NFL season almost here. Fantasy football full swing. It's happening this season. Yahoo Fantasy is taking it up a notch and giving you a fantasy football experience like never before. This year I'm playing on Yahoo. Fantasy and you should too, because we have a big ringer league that we're doing. We're going to do a live draft. We're going to have bragging Rights and all kinds of things that are going to be happening. You should join us. You should have your own league. Yahoo fantasy dropping 28 big new features over 28 days through August. They just dropped Yahoo Fantasy guillotine leagues where the lowest scoring team gets eliminated weekly until one is left standing. Give this new mode a try or stick with the classics in private head to head leagues or public leagues. Stay tuned for more killer announcements. Start playing Yahoo. Fantasy football now@yahooFantasy.com Simmons. All right, my old friend Kevin Wilds is here. He is a national Talking head on FS1's First Things first and yet continues to have the worst home video setup of any guests we have.
Kevin Wilds
I don't know how to do it, you know, because I'm never, I'm never. You know what if I figured out how to do it, maybe I could say, hey, I'm going to do the show from home. But since I've never figured out how to do it. Yeah, I go to the office every day, so I should probably invest some time. I still have three books. Like, this is the first day of the pandemic. I'm like, I'm going to stack some books up.
Bill Simmons
I was going to say, Kevin Wilds, keeping 2020 alive.
Kevin Wilds
I'm in the room we never go to. There's nothing cool.
Bill Simmons
I caught you on a Sunday night, east coast time after you went to a family function and I asked if you'd been drinking. And your comment, well, say what you said about when you have drinks these days.
Kevin Wilds
Well, I say I'm only Topo Chico now. And I'm very aware that even after one drink I'm less interesting. And it may have always been that way, but it certainly felt like I was more interesting. Or maybe it's that I felt like I was, I mean, you know, just like rounded some conversation.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
Or just like there was no maybe it's just because I don't feel awkward at all anymore ever. I guess I've. I've reached old man. I don't feel the need to like lubricate any conversations anymore.
Bill Simmons
You're just hitting it 275 yards down the, down the fairway. You're not trying to hit it.300 at the same time.
Kevin Wilds
My wife and I went through because the kids were at camp these last two weeks. So she was going out with all of her friends, catching up, and she told the kids like, yeah, dad doesn't have any friends. And I said, I have friends. She said, no, your friends in town are just the Kids, parents. I said, yeah, but they're still my friends independently. But I don't have any independent friends. So maybe that's. Maybe they're all tied together.
Bill Simmons
You know, it's not just your wife that says that, because my wife has said that, too, about how you never. You. You have all these friends, you never see them. And. And the reality is women are just better at coordinating when we hit their 40s and after, they're just better at coordinating dinners, going out, doing things, and. Whereas the guys, we were great at it in our teens and our twenties, and then it just gets worse every decade. And then eventually you're like, I haven't seen whoever in three years. And. And we're fine with it.
Kevin Wilds
Five years is like seven years. I think my dad hasn't had seen buddies in, like, 40 years. But then I'm like, hey, what's going on? Like, nothing. Got a new truck. Like, oh, that's good. And then, you know, last year you.
Bill Simmons
Came over to watch. What did we watch? Football or basketball or. You came over.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, you just surprised me.
Bill Simmons
You texted me. Yeah. You're like, hey, I'm in town. Can I come over? I was like, I was delighted that somebody was coming over on short notice.
Kevin Wilds
It might be the. Too much. It might be too much texting. That texting gives you a false sense of connectivity where you really should just, like, old school, Seinfeld apartment style. Just like, Elaine's here. Just show up. So just show up.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. I've seen a lot of my old friends this summer just for different reasons. And it's always one of those things where it's like, why don't we make a concerted effort to do this more often? But the reality is, guys are just bad at it.
Kevin Wilds
Well, too much planning. Yeah, I think it's that. I think it's like. Like, hey, could you. Do, you know, can you. Hey, Bill, how about November 17th? Like, well, I know I got this thing, and it has to be like, hey, tomorrow we're go. We're like, right now, 9pm it's how you bought the podcast.
Bill Simmons
9Pm but you know who's figured it out?
Kevin Wilds
Who?
Bill Simmons
The golf people and the fishing people. They do, like, golf trips, going to wherever, going to Pinehurst and late April, and they plan it nine months ahead of time because you have to make reservations. And the same thing with the weirdo fishing people. So I know a bunch of fishing people, and they're like, yeah, we go fishing, and then we. We all get together and we take gummies and Then we catch the fish and we throw them back. It's like, what's fun about that?
Kevin Wilds
But it's smaller windows. Like, I think if we were into something with a limited window, like, my buddy fish is like, oh, excuse me, striped bass are running. So you have to. You guys have to hang out in this time period.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
But if we're just, like, gonna watch football, like, hey, want to hang out sometime between, like, preseason and the Super Bowl? Like, yeah, we'll figure it out.
Bill Simmons
And next thing you know, week eight, week ten.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah. It just never happened. That just never happened. It's like, you know, I'll get you next year. Well, you wanna do the draft?
Bill Simmons
Like, yeah, yeah, Maybe we have sporting events that we'll go to, like a basketball game.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, that was good. You come to New York. That was good.
Bill Simmons
I forget where I saw this first, but somebody said when men gather together, it's better. They like situations where they're both next to each other, looking at the same thing forward. But when women are together, they like looking at each other. They like being. And it's like this weird physics thing. Not physics, sociological thing. Whatever the right word is.
Kevin Wilds
Oh, I like to look. I don't want to look at. It's too confrontational.
Bill Simmons
We, like, like, on a road trip where somebody's next to somebody, you drive to Vegas, or, like, you play blackjack together. You're all on a table.
Kevin Wilds
Yes.
Bill Simmons
Whereas, like, women like seeing each other.
Kevin Wilds
No. Like, I would prefer, like, TV if, like, we all went out to dinner. Tv, sitcom seating, where we're all, like, in a round.
Bill Simmons
Like in a horseshoe. Yeah. Yes.
Kevin Wilds
And then the camera's there. They, oh, what's going on? But you're never, like, locked in mono y mano. Like, does this guy want to fight me right now? Like, what's going on?
Bill Simmons
Well, you're. You're my legitimate friend, and I think I've seen you once in three years.
Kevin Wilds
The other problem is the better friend you are, The. The. The less time. I have a. My buddy that I grew up with, that my mom taught with. I haven't seen him 20, 20 years, but I'm friends with him. He's my friend. But, you know, if we were worse friends, we'd hang out. Like, I gotta see that guy.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Cause you gotta, like, almost. You gotta make the friendship happen. Yeah, true. We're post friendship. See each other whenever.
Kevin Wilds
That's right.
Shield Kapadia
Just.
Kevin Wilds
We're post friendship. Post hanging out.
Bill Simmons
I made you the second guest on this podcast because I knew your camera setup was Gonna be terrible. And now we've moved to a video podcast era. You missed. I unveiled my QB pyramid for the preseason and Patrick Mahomes was not in the number one spot.
Kevin Wilds
It was Josh Allen, you know, probably statistically fair at the same time, like Z now 04 against him head to head in the playoffs.
Bill Simmons
He is.
Kevin Wilds
That's got, I mean, something.
Bill Simmons
I'm trying to light a fire under Mahomes. Cause I, I just didn't love last season for him for somebody who's supposed to be the goat. And I didn't like all the money I lost when I'm in the Super Bowl. So. You know what? Fire lit.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah. I mean, if he. The weird thing that's going to happen is if they win and he has another statistically mediocre season.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
Are we just going to say, like, ah, you know, attacks you, like, look at some of those Brady years. And maybe he is kind of like post statistics and his fourth quarter statistics are still crazy. His like, record, he's like, what is. He's like 700 winning percentage. Like when he's down a score in.
Bill Simmons
The fourth quarter, it's 14 and 7. When they're trailing in the fourth quarter, whatever.
Kevin Wilds
It's just like, it's an unnatural stat. So until those things go sideways, you still haven't won. I still actually have him one. I like to, you know, tease Nick Wright about it, but. And I don't love the hypothetical draft. Like, start a franchise, but I feel like he's obviously the answer.
Bill Simmons
The thing is, I'm not sure he is anymore, but this is it.
Kevin Wilds
But. But then what happened?
Bill Simmons
Like, I just thought Allen was incredible last season. And it's the classic. If you just switch the guys in their situations, how would each team look? And I, I think it's just, it's open for a debate, which is fun.
Kevin Wilds
And there's.
Bill Simmons
It's the worst sports summer we've had all. All decades. So that's kind of thing we argue about.
Kevin Wilds
He was down like he had the ball with three minutes left in the fourth quarter. And if I was like, hey, one of these guys is definitely going to score and one of them's not and the season's going to be over on a bad push. Push or less.
Bill Simmons
I know.
Kevin Wilds
I do love Josh. I mean, he is amazing, but I'm still a Mahomes guy.
Bill Simmons
Are you a Trayvon Henderson? Like, what kind of stock do you have at this point? Kevin and I are both Pats fans. For the audience. The Henderson thing was unbelievable on Friday Night.
Kevin Wilds
So here's how I'm viewing pre. I don't know how to really watch preseason football because, like, there's too many variables. So this is how I've come to judge it in my mind. You know how they do ice skating, like the spinning, ice skating, like the flips and stuff? No, flips. Flips are actually not a lot, but twirls. Yeah, they take all the, you know, the six scores, top score, bottom score, and top score get thrown out. And you just judge from these scores. I do the opposite. I'm like, what? Let me look at this preseason game and look at your worst plays and your best. That's all I care. Everything in the middle that looks like a normal play, I throw out. I'm just looking for the peaks in valleys. And that was a definite peak. All in. Surprise, surprise. The fast guy from Ohio State still looks super fast. There's been zero letdown. Amazing. The Drake May thing, on the other hand, I'm surprised that is being dismissed so casually. The Mac Jonesian. Oh, you know, I'm going to take a sack. Let me try to make something amazing happen or just get rid of the ball. I hated that with all my heart. I hated that so much. I think it really put a scare into me, and hopefully it did. Variable as well.
Bill Simmons
Henderson was genuinely, euphorically exciting. He just. He just has it. You just know right away. It's like, this guy's clearly an NFL running back who's going to be exclusive, but awesome. Yeah, he's at least Gibbs.
Kevin Wilds
He's. Yes, he's at least Gibbs is a fantastic comparison.
Bill Simmons
But I mean, how they're going to use him and the kind of explosiveness he's going to have. They have speed and they can block, and I think you and I are both. We would have been probably leaning high on them anyway. But when you throw in the schedule and the coach and it's just. It's the whole. It's the entire recipe. But there's the Drake May piece. That's the. That's the one bar. It's like, is he a year away from being ready for this, or is he ready now?
Kevin Wilds
He should be ready now. Here's the other thing no one's talking about. I think Coach Mangini told me this.
Bill Simmons
Oh, what a name drop.
Kevin Wilds
Josh McDaniels. We're like, oh, and we have Josh McDaniels. Josh McDaniels has gotten better. It's like Josh McDaniels has been, like, moving around, studying stuff like Josh McDaniels revenge tour is happening now, too. So I think that it's just natural for all Patriots fans. Like, oh, yeah, Josh McDaniels, like, proven quality. Like, no, what if the Josh McDaniels, last time you saw him, is now a much better coordinator? Besides the fact that he got more head coaching, now he's a much better offensive coordinator. Like, hey, guys, by the way, I think we had the 9th best scoring offense with Mac Jones. Like, I'm going to make this work. And he couldn't run a yard. Like, it's going to work. I made games interesting with Cam Newton. He couldn't throw. And now I get to combine those guys. It's an odd comparison. Mac Jones and. And Drake may. Excuse me, Mac and Cam, but you have a guy who can throw the ball and run. I think, you know, I'm probably too optimistic. I'm like, if I had. If I. If I had another Topo Chico, I'd start talking crazy about the Patriots.
Bill Simmons
I had them 12 and 5 mentally two weeks ago. Now I've brought it down to 10 and 7. Now I'm mentally 10 and 7 again. I had a 12 and 5 stretch for like four days when they're all excited about the rookies. I know. I'm not saying it's rational.
Kevin Wilds
It's like, if we lost their opening game to the Raiders with Pete Carroll and Gina, I'd be like, what?
Bill Simmons
Oh, yeah.
Kevin Wilds
Like, yeah, like, you guys are the Patriots. Like, what makes you like, I don't know. We just. We thought we were awesome.
Bill Simmons
Preseason's idiotic. But you can notice is a team, like, do they actually have some sort of identity that they're going for? And for the Patriots, the identity is they're a violent team. This version of the variable team. It's like a hats to the ball, people blocking after the whistle.
Kevin Wilds
Oh, my goodness, all that shit's happening.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
You know what? It comes back to Vrabel jumping in the pile. Yeah, Vrabel coming up bloody.
Bill Simmons
I just.
Kevin Wilds
I mean, I just love it. I would be. If we're not good this year, it's really gonna. I'm gonna really be doing some soul searching.
Bill Simmons
Well, you think, like, Miami is not going to be good? The Jets.
Kevin Wilds
Are we sure Miami's not going to be good?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I am.
Kevin Wilds
I'm sure the Bills are going to be good.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
I look at Aaron Glenn and Justin Fields, who I've seen torture the Patriots and Sauce and Garrett Wilson. Like, I'm not willing to say they're going to Be bad.
Bill Simmons
And then two, with you on the jets, they're. There's some sort of running defense, low scoring, kind of physical identity that they might have.
Kevin Wilds
That's happening for them too. And I know, like, we just assume that the Dolphins are going to be bad, but we're going to go down there and lose like we every year. And then it's, oh, surprise, surprise. Tua, who has led the league at some point in completion percentage, yards in like yards per attempt. He's going to do something crazy again, like, oh, yeah, two is actually pretty good. Tyreek Hill's pretty good. Like a chance. Like, I'm just not willing to write them off as being bad. Yeah, they're going to be like kind of like a chill team because it's Miami.
Bill Simmons
But offensive line is terrible, secondary is going to be terrible. I have no idea if their coach is good. We still don't know. He's certainly good in press conferences. Well, he's, he, he might have never been good. I think we just wanted him to be good because his press conferences were fun. And then Tua gets hurt every year. What was your bleakest moment during one of the bleakest sports content summers we've had? What was the bleakest show? What was the most forced segment where it's like, fuck, it's Wednesday. We got nothing.
Kevin Wilds
We have talked more. Let me say this, not too mean spirited, but there's a point where I think Trey Hendrickson's immediate family would have days. And then people are, dad's got to go to Home Depot and the mom's got to go run some errands and sisters, everybody's aunts and uncles. I think there's days where Trey Hendrickson's immediate family talked less about Trey Hendrickson than we did on the show. Like, we talk a lot of Trey Hendrickson. I'm like, guys, I don't think Trey Hendrickson's a, Trey Henderson's moving the knee. He led the league in sacks. And Cincinnati, like, I think the deal is good. I think the deal's getting done. And when they, when he does come back, they had a horrible offense. So it's kind of, it's not even, it's not Michael Parsons, which is the Cowboys and Tamaica.
Bill Simmons
Oh, I can't wait to talk about that. I have a half baked idea specifically.
Kevin Wilds
For that right away about Michael Carson.
Bill Simmons
You're starting half baked ideas. It's your thing. But I have a half baked idea. It's peripherally tied to Michael Parsons, but we've been doing Half baked ideas. This is your thing. It's been your thing forever. When I had my old podcast and ESPN used to come on and do them, we kept them going. We kept them going. And now, almost 17, 18 years later, you still have half baked ideas. I asked you to come up with some. I always bring, like, a couple small ones. But this is really your show. What's. What. What's on the docket? Is it. Do we have, like, appetizers and a giant entree? Is it multiple entrees? What do you have?
Kevin Wilds
I can start. You know what? I have a food. I have two food ones right off. Right off the jump if you want to do that.
Bill Simmons
Let's go.
Kevin Wilds
Restaurant idea.
Bill Simmons
Okay.
Kevin Wilds
I wrote down phrases to get you interested.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
Food, mediocre ambiance, blah. Service, unreliable location, inconvenient menu font. Freaking huge. Huge font. The font's huge. The bill. When your bill comes, that's huge. The fonts in this place, just for people who.
Bill Simmons
Whose eyesight is kind of going on.
Shield Kapadia
Them a little bit.
Kevin Wilds
They're not. They're not saying that. Is it called huge font restaurant? Maybe, but I would like to dance around it a little bit more. But it is a place. I'm tired of going somewhere and being embarrassed.
Bill Simmons
Like, I'm not very lit. Like, huge lights. Like, almost like studio lights.
Kevin Wilds
I hate that. I don't like that at all. It's just the font. The fonts out here. Like the. Like the. You know, the teleprompter you have to read at the Academy Awards from when it's out in the seats. Huge font. Oh, yeah, there it is. I'll have the beef Wellington. Just Wellington written almost like a graffiti train. Boom. Huge font. Bill comes. What is that? How much is this? Is that a. Am I gonna tip wrong? Am I.
Bill Simmons
Are you using your Apple phone to try to.
Kevin Wilds
I don't do. Because, like, the senior citizen two tables down's using phone. I can't do that.
Bill Simmons
Probably me.
Kevin Wilds
You know what I'm doing? Dangerous. I take the candle. I'm like, oh, no. I'm just looking at the candle. I'm about to burn the whole restaurant down.
Bill Simmons
So not at huge font. Not at the huge font either.
Kevin Wilds
No. Huge font restaurant. You're in there, you can, you know, have a good meal and leave with your dignity intact.
Bill Simmons
Huge font To a good start. I love huge font. Huge font restaurant. What was the other restaurant?
Kevin Wilds
One. Okay, I can. I had a nice dinner. I made nice dinner for the family. Steak, vegetables. I'm on the grill. I'm doing my thing. We set it up. We got the. We got the plates, steak. We got it all, the whole thing. Right. Flowers. Only thing I can't do in the best part of eating at a restaurant can't do the bread. I can't figure it out either. I get it from the store and it's, like, stale. By the time it gets in the home, it's just like, I gotta cut it. I can't cut it. It's, like, hard. It's like a Easton stick of bread. Or I've got bread in a plastic bag that looks like it's been there for a week and hasn't aged at all. It's like when I, you know, the algorithm is serving up all these, like, fitness influencers. Like, I'm 74. I'm like, Bro, you actually look right. The fact that you haven't aged makes you even grosser. That's that bread ice cream truck for bread comes around the neighborhood. 5:15. It's got a little bread song. Who wants bread? It's. Maybe it's French. There's a guy with, like, a little chapeau on. He comes out, oh, good, my hot bread. I leave like a, you know, a little French boy. I have a striped shirt on. I'm bicycling to my home. Come in, slice the bread. I've got everything working. Oh, it comes in a basket as well. Obviously. Like a cool basket. It's different types. I don't know where you get that bread. Pretzel bread. And then your meal goes to the next level and you don't have to deal with any. If there's not a. If there's not a large font restaurant, like, within, you know, your vicinity, you can have the restaurant experience at home and not get embarrassed.
Bill Simmons
That's. That might be a fully baked idea.
Kevin Wilds
That one works.
Bill Simmons
I actually had a restaurant one as well.
Kevin Wilds
Let's hear it.
Bill Simmons
You know, I go out to dinner from time to time.
Kevin Wilds
Sure.
Bill Simmons
Double dates. Go out with the wife, go out with a bunch of people. And this has been ever since I've gone out to dinner, even as a kid with my. With my mom, my stepdad or my dad or my stepmom, whatever. You go to the restaurant a bunch and you get to know some of the people. I'm like, you know me, I'm like, I don't want to know my neighbors. I'm not friend. Other people, like, super friendly. And some people will make friends with the Mater D. The maitre d. I even know why I called it Mater Die.
Kevin Wilds
I wouldn't correct you. It's re. I'm not even sure it's French again.
Bill Simmons
Maitre D. I'll talk to whoever. The host and the person will come over and it's like. And come and do the whole thing. We saw this happen in baseball with. They sped up the game in baseball. They had the pitch. Clock, I think Matri D. Clock. There's a little bell on the thing. It's like a minute. It's like in chess, it's like searching for Bobby Fischer. They come over, they hit the clock, it's a minute, and they go, how you guys doing? Blah, blah, blah. How are you going Anywhere? But. But it's got to be done in 60 seconds. You can't linger for the seven minutes.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Where it's like one of the four people at the table who's probably had too much to drink. They're like, so what's happening with Rosa? Did she go off to college yet? And you're just like, what just happened? We were just talking about our friends.
Kevin Wilds
We just did. Oh, yeah, we did.
Bill Simmons
Can we go back to talk about our divorce friends?
Kevin Wilds
We got the zoning for it to add another level.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Just. What are we talking about? 60 seconds or less. Matri, stop, Stop. Clock. Yeah. It's like chess. Bang it. 60 seconds.
Kevin Wilds
You wanted to be friend. Yeah, I think that's fair.
Bill Simmons
Friendly. 60 seconds is more than enough to catch up.
Kevin Wilds
That is. That is, you know, a third of a heavyweight fight. Like, you can get it done in 60 seconds.
Bill Simmons
So this was the Sopranos episode. Artie was going over to the tables and hanging around too long, and then finally somebody said something to him and his feelings got hurt and he's like, that's why they come. They come for the food and then talk to me and. And his wife was like, they hate when you come over. Don't come over. I think there's a middle ground. I like talking, but they can get out. All right, what's your next half baked idea? We're moving away from restaurants now.
Kevin Wilds
I have. Oh, this is similar about. About. About baseball. So. Oh, this is the rarest of all things. Someone coming up to me, a fan of the podcast, pitching me a half baked idea.
Bill Simmons
Oh, do you like that or is it. Or you feel like.
Kevin Wilds
I appreciate. People love the show. The show is very popular. You are in my. I, you know, I pop in every once in a while, but this is a very narrow needle to thread. Because if it's a good idea, I'm like, buddy, that's Just a good idea. That's not what I'm into. And if it's a bad idea, like, why is this guy talking to me about bad ideas? It's got to be a half baked idea. And it's tough. It's just tough. Next thing you know, my buddy Tim, I was like, tim, you've done it. That is the perfect half baked idea.
Bill Simmons
Okay, Perfect.
Kevin Wilds
So he says, he's like, I'm watching this baseball game the other night, gets out of hand, and they bring in the position player to pitch, which is fun, always exciting.
Bill Simmons
I always enjoy it.
Kevin Wilds
It's fun for a little while, but, you know, the bloom is off the rose. Eventually, if he's still in there and.
Bill Simmons
He'S locked for like three innings.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, it's too much. The other day, and I wrote it down, Rockies, Blue jays, it was 12 1. They bring in the backup catcher, he gives up eight runs. So now the Blue Jays are up there blasting this guy. It's like, all right, enough.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
Like, should their stats even really count? Like, I don't know. So this is my buddy, Tim Smokes. He goes, you know how they have those emergency goalies in hockey where it's just like the local guy who played hockey, they don't try to take a position player and suit him up like, you're goalie. Now they have a real goalie who's just an amateur. And that's even more exciting because sometimes those guys like win games. High school. High school flame outs. Triple college kids.
Bill Simmons
They're just on. They're just on duty at the game.
Kevin Wilds
Yes. They have both jerseys ready and their high school hat or whatever they are. It's like A. It's 12:1. We're bringing in Tim.
Bill Simmons
He.
Kevin Wilds
He works at Lowe's, but he was all state five years ago for the Falcons.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Shield Kapadia
And he comes in and next thing.
Kevin Wilds
You know, it's him and Ohtani. It's so much better. And. But he's throwing gas. He's not throwing these lollipops. He's really trying to throw. And who knows, you'd get a little rally, maybe get a nice story out of it.
Bill Simmons
So best case scenario, the guy's awesome and maybe gets signed to like a Triple A deal.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, I don't need to see, you know, it's fun for the first lollipop pitch and then it's like, oh, we threw a fast one. But this guy's out here trying to really throw. Got a few of them.
Bill Simmons
I like it. So it's almost like, what's the both sides QB in a touch football game. What do we call that? The qb. All time qb. It's like an all time pitcher. He's just available for either side.
Shield Kapadia
Either side.
Bill Simmons
It's like we're playing in Philadelphia this weekend and our, our all time pitcher for the weekend. You remember him? He pitched at Drexel for two years.
Kevin Wilds
Yes. And his buddies. The thing is, the weird thing is like his buddies wouldn't even go to the game because he's going to be sitting there for 80 games.
Bill Simmons
Right. But you never know. Three times a year he walks in.
Kevin Wilds
And he's got his Drexel hat. People start going nuts.
Bill Simmons
He gets, he gets good seats.
Kevin Wilds
Oh yeah. He's always. He's just worried that oh, he's warming up.
Bill Simmons
So when it's so it's like an eight or nine run game. It's eight to one. Nine to one. All of a sudden he gets out, starts, takes on, start loosening up. Yeah, that would be great.
Kevin Wilds
All the Drexel alum. The other idea I had of that, I put this one on Twitter of how they've made all these relief pitchers. Their entrances have gotten really produced. Would you be into that with field goal kickers? In pivotal moments, the lights go out in the stadium. Harrison Butler, people are going nuts. The place going crazy. Or the other option it's for. It's because home team specific. When the other guy is getting ready, you play some like, I don't know.
Bill Simmons
You try to mess with them.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, like you know, non confident music. I don't know what that is.
Bill Simmons
Other than like that Coldplay song that the couple was on the Jumbotron for.
Kevin Wilds
He's like what was it was. What is that inferring? Like it's like really in his own.
Bill Simmons
Head or you play the shining music.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, just something. But. But it's more. I don't know how much money and time the Mets are spending on that, but it really works. And the Phillies are doing it too. There's like fire and stuff happening. More entrances. People love them. No one's ever upset at an entrance in a pivotal moment.
Bill Simmons
I don't remember when it started with the reliever music, but Papelbahn was the first Red Sox guy that remember he used to come in.
Kevin Wilds
What did he come into?
Bill Simmons
He came into the dropkick Murphy song.
Kevin Wilds
Oh, oh, I thought that was just a Red Sox song. That was hit. He started that.
Bill Simmons
Didn't he come in and that was the song. Right. I'm old. I can't remember anything that's like, yeah.
Kevin Wilds
I always just assumed that was a.
Bill Simmons
Red Sox, but I don't remember anything before that. That felt like the era Enter Mariano.
Kevin Wilds
Used to come in to Enter Sandman. That was a big thing.
Bill Simmons
So that was late 90s. But there's got to be somebody before then.
Kevin Wilds
But then it didn't used to be cool like it used to be like the Rolaid's Fireman of the year. They used to just play like the Rolaids music, I think the roll AIDS theme song.
Bill Simmons
Well, WWE had entrances forever. And then the road Dog, Jesse James and Billy Gunn would come out and do, oh, you didn't know your ass better, call somebody. And the whole crowd would go nuts. And then in wrestling they were like, oh shit, we gotta. It's became like a call and response.
Kevin Wilds
And that's then the pyro started going. I just love it.
Bill Simmons
Your field goal kicker thing is a really interesting idea. So Bucker's warming up in the place. I guess there's not enough time. It would almost have to be coming out of a timeout or something.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, yeah. I mean you just build time in for it. Like he takes his, he takes his sweet time. He jogs out there. People are nuts.
Bill Simmons
I really like it.
Kevin Wilds
Checking that one as a win.
Bill Simmons
No, that's a win. This episode is brought to you by Workday There are two kinds of people in the world. Backward thinkers and forward thinkers. Forward thinkers have plans 15 minutes from now and 15 years from now. They're not just one step ahead, they're 1,000 steps ahead. And when you're a forward thinker, you need a platform that thinks like you do. Workdays AI illuminates decision making and reimagines how you manage your people and money for long term success. Workday moving business forever forward. Find out more@workday.com this episode is brought to you by Brooks Running. Brooks reminds us that we're all powered by something. For me, it's the me time energy of a walk after a workday. I find the positive physical and mental benefits it provides are so valuable. So whether it's the feel good distraction free Ghost, the supercharged Hyperion Max, or the fan favorite Adrenaline, Brooks makes gear designed to unleash your energy. Because at the end of the day, one step has the power to change everything. Let's run there. Head to BrooksRunning.com to learn more. I had a quick one. Restaurant related.
Kevin Wilds
Another one?
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I've talked about this with Chang and all the chefs. They really get mad about this. My Whole thing on dry aged steak.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
I don't know if you've heard me do this.
Kevin Wilds
No, I haven't heard this.
Bill Simmons
All the foodies go nuts about the dry aged steak and, and how great it is and it's so buttery and it's like there's, it's a whole other level. It's like the greatest steak you can have. And oh, this is age for 180 days and, and then you just get diarrhea that night. And I don't think the common person cares whether a steak has been dry aged or not. I think this is really for like the food elite and the people who really care about this shit. You can definitely, it definitely tastes a little different, a little elevated. But I don't know like, how many friends do you have are like, oh, we got to go to this place. It's 90 day dry aged. It's.
Kevin Wilds
If you put me to the test, I would probably put steak and wine in the same category of like, if you say so. Oh yeah, I can taste it. So But I know it's not a hamburger, but like, yeah, I got this steak from Costco and this one's been hanging in like the Louvre for two years and I'm all right. They both, they're pretty good for me. They got salt on it.
Bill Simmons
This brings me to my take because I think I'm like this and I think a lot of people are like this where it's like, if you say so. And this is really for your show and for the daily talk shows where you come up with stuff. All right, Dry aged takes. You came up with the take but you've been marinating on it for 180 days. And then you're like, guys, it's ready. I have a dry aged take. I've been thinking about it since it's December 2024 and now the take is ready. It's a dry aged take and it really is just a take you came up with anyway. But because you said it was dry aged, now I have to take it more seriously. You've been marinating on this for 170 days.
Kevin Wilds
It's a take, but it's not a take. Like I'm not putting a take into the, you know, wherever it is. No, it's not something that's red. It's been, I've been, I haven't debut, I haven't been ready to debut this take yet.
Bill Simmons
It would be like me saying now I think Josh Allen is at the top of my QB pyramid and here Are all my reasons why. And I have it laid out and it's like, I've actually felt this way since February, but I've been dry aging it and going on Pro football Reference and really trying to get it ready.
Kevin Wilds
I feel like you need to, like, you have to have some, like, proof that it's dry aged.
Bill Simmons
I feel like that's the thing. Do we have proof with the stakes when they're like, it's 180 days. Was it. Do you have photos of each day? How do I know it was 180 days? It could have been like 30.
Kevin Wilds
I also am too embarrassed to be like, so I just threw away some ground beef that was in the fridge because it said sell by, you know, August 5th and it's August whatever now.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
And so how does the 180 days thing work? Because I would thought it was rotten. Is it just.
Bill Simmons
They put all this stuff on it. See this? Chang is probably listening to this, losing his mind now. Yeah, it's like salt that cured all this stuff.
Kevin Wilds
What's your next? That's not my problem. I'm the consumer. The restaurant industry hasn't done a good idea job messaging to me.
Bill Simmons
I am a little worried that this is a whole marketing thing. And it's a little like crypto. We just go to restaurants. Yeah. And you're just like, yeah, it's a 180 day dry aged steak. And they're just making it up. They just buy. It's like one day. They didn't do it at all. How do we know? People lie about everything. Our AI is coming. Our whole society is about deceiving other people. We can't lie about dry steak.
Kevin Wilds
I mean, I get. I mean. Yeah, I guess you could. All right. I got another one from my buddy.
Bill Simmons
Okay.
Kevin Wilds
Lives down the street from me.
Bill Simmons
So this is the same one who came up with the other one?
Kevin Wilds
No, different guy. Different guy.
Bill Simmons
I was gonna say. That guy's on fire. I have any friends?
Kevin Wilds
I'm really.
Bill Simmons
Filled with friends.
Kevin Wilds
No, no, they're all fake. They're all just AI bots. Okay.
Bill Simmons
Friends. All right.
Kevin Wilds
So I think he. I don't know. I forgot how he got to this. I'm gonna say he was on a skiing. He was in a skiing accident. I was like, I'm taking some creative liberties with this. Like, how you. Ben. He comes over, he's like, oh, good. We went out skiing and I got. Sounds lovely. I don't love skiing. I don't love falling down. He's like, yeah, I broke something. Had to get surgery on a bunch of surgery. I said, oh, that sounds bad. I like, did you have to go under for that? He's like, yeah. I was like, oh, that stinks. He goes, no, I love it. I'm like, what do you mean you love it? Like, I love it. Like, I got Colin, Oscar. I just. I love going up. He's like, I love anesthesia. I'm like, I don't know. This is good, dude. It sounds like you're, like, on the verge. He's like, no, I love it. So is he love. So he's like, I'm like, you know, I'm gonna talk to Bill about. He also loves. I'm gonna talk to Bill about that. Like, just, like, voluntary anesthesia, but you don't want to. Just like, I don't think that doing it recreationally can't you die during anesthesia.
Bill Simmons
Like, it's incredibly dangerous.
Kevin Wilds
You know, you can die a lot of ways. So it's under. Yes. I don't think again. It's half baked. I'm not saying you should do recreational anesthesia. So I'm trying to. This is where I'm trying to. I'm trying to round the edges of his idea. So he's like, yeah, I love it. I'm like, all right, so same time, send my Volt. We got a Volvo. We went and sent the Volvo. It's been gone for three days. It's just like. We thought it needed a tire. Tire change in oil. It's like, no, we're giving it a thousand point inspection. They're checking everything. I'm like, boom. Go into the doctor. Instead of getting a last time, I got a checkup. They're like, how much do you weigh? I'm like, are you weighing me? What? I could do this on my own. I'm paying for this. To get weighed and measured. Check. Yes. My heart is still beating. Go under. Run it all. Run everything. Just treat me like a Volvo. We're already crossed the biggest. When you got a colonosi. We've already crossed the largest hurdle. Just get in there. Check the lungs, check the stents. Check it all, man. What's going on up here? Just make sure nothing's growing anywhere. Check it all and it's. And make it yearly, but really get under the hood.
Bill Simmons
So just yearly anesthesia. Intentional anesthesia once a year. Just go to town on me.
Kevin Wilds
Checkups. We're extreme checkups. I want to make sure I come out refurbished. I'm like, I'm brand new. Heck, take some stuff out. Just like do an Easter. Like, hey, you're. We just switch some stuff out. Hey, switch out. You know what? Your achilles tendon's got 45 years of use on it. We threw a new one in there. Oh, cool. Thanks. Just fix me up, dude.
Bill Simmons
This is probably where life is going.
Kevin Wilds
I'm just getting switched out.
Bill Simmons
I like this. Well, it reminds me of like, like the people who. Who intentionally get IVs the next day after they've done a lot of drinking is the thing. That's a 21st century thing. Yeah. Our generation did not do. No, but some people swear by it.
Kevin Wilds
Well, of course it works. But you're getting an iv. It's part of, like, you have to deal with the punishment. That's part of the. I mean, that's part of the process.
Bill Simmons
So that's how I felt.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, you can't. You're not done with the race yet. You have to, you know, crash. You gotta. It's part of it.
Bill Simmons
What's your next one?
Kevin Wilds
You might like this.
Bill Simmons
I.
Kevin Wilds
This is a bad idea. What do you think about. Remember you kicked around the idea of like, there's some podcasts out there that maybe it's just all podcasts that are like two hour podcasts, but they're only existing for like the gold clip to take off. And the rest of the podcast is kind of in support of kind of.
Bill Simmons
Mining, just trying to get that 90 second Instagram.
Kevin Wilds
And that's what actually is the driver. And everything else is kind of. It's like when you find out like, you know, McDonald's actually only selling you the drink and the food is all free. Like, what? Yeah, it's like drinks where the margin is like, oh, I didn't realize.
Bill Simmons
It's like Paul George's pod when he's like, there's a time there where I was the best, best player in the league. If you actually look at it, I was better than LeBron. Then it's like, whoa, clip. And you have no idea what happened on the rest of the podcast.
Kevin Wilds
So I'll be watching YouTube's or some random clips from movies and. And everyone's like, it's a good clip, a good scene. And then the first comment on YouTube is like, what movie is this from? And someone will write, I don't know what movies are from? And then it'll be a movie. Like, I don't know if that movie even exists. This movie might just exist for this scene. So not short films, just. Just scenes. Like, hey, so I wrote down some scenes. I'll give You. I'll make a sports one. This classic scene that I'll always watch. It happened. I think it was inspired by Die Hard, but you've seen a few times bad guys that, you know, the bad guys got a, you know, bad guy's got a Dodgers hat on. Yeah, but he's. He doesn't. He doesn't like the Dodgers. He doesn't know he's from somewhere else. And you walk up, you're the good guy. You're like, hey, who the dodge. What was. You get the Dodgers, Lakers score. And he's like, oh, yeah. Five, four. Yeah, you're not a Dodgers fan, buddy. You're a bad guy. Love it. Oh, what's happening? You're speaking in a foreign language to your counterpart because you think I don't understand it. Surprise, surprise. I do speak that language and I answered back to you. So. So just several scenes.
Bill Simmons
That sounds like AI could just do that now.
Kevin Wilds
So I wanted. So. So I'm going to get to another one. Car chasing, going through different markets and things. Fruits exploding and all of that. Then I got to. Can you combine all of these scenes? And I just wrote down Die Hard in a Costco. Oh, where's that scene from? It's from Die Hard in a Costco.
Bill Simmons
The movie doesn't actually exist. But you make it seem like it did.
Kevin Wilds
No, but maybe I just put enough. I've got. It's got like 12 scenes, but there's no, like, opening scene. Like, the movie doesn't actually work. It's. You can't sit and watch the movie. It's just 12 scenes from Die Hard in a Costco. But you get.
Bill Simmons
I thought you were going toward playing scenes, you know, when they played the scenes to fire up the crowd at like an NBA game. Yeah, but now they have this technology with the AI where, like, there was a great one last week where Aaron Judge was just like, Aaron Boone's an idiot. I wish I played for the Red Sox. It was like this minute long thing, but it was just AI like changing his voice. But. But I thought that's where you were going, where you take scenes and you could show them to the crowd and it's just the stuff to get the fans fired up.
Kevin Wilds
That would work too. But would you get really fired up on that? People don't like AI. People are.
Bill Simmons
I didn't really like it until the Aaron Judge Red Sox thing. And then I was like, there's something here. My dad got completely fooled like six months ago with. With a Kristaps Porzingis AI thing where he gave something, he just said all these crazy things. And my dad was like, did you hear what Porzingis said?
Kevin Wilds
This is gonna be bad.
Bill Simmons
I was like, dad, dad, this is AI. No, there's gonna be like, AI discl.
Kevin Wilds
That's going to be the end of us. All right.
Bill Simmons
I have a really quick one, by the way.
Kevin Wilds
All right, go.
Bill Simmons
So, you know, on Instagram, if you look at like the. There's. There's some thing on Instagram where you can look at this for you suggestions and it's all of these things and it's supposed to mirror the stuff you care about, but it's really like, when you look at it, it's like, oh, now. Yeah, is this stuff I care about? I think you should be able to pay extra for some Instagram filter for that section where it's like all stuff that makes you seem like a great person.
Kevin Wilds
Where it's a subscription tier. It's just like, oh, hey, here's the charities that you've donated to.
Bill Simmons
Like, if anyone picks up your phone and they look at your Instagram, they're like, wow. Oh man, look at this. He's just doing a lot of research on. Wow. I didn't realize you were human behavior.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, I didn't realize you were this into like saving redwood trees.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I didn't realize how much carbon.
Kevin Wilds
Dioxide they take out of the trees.
Bill Simmons
This much.
Kevin Wilds
Wow.
Bill Simmons
I didn't realize he liked clean water this much. These are all his videos.
Kevin Wilds
He's like, wow, he really wants the.
Bill Simmons
WNBA players to get paid.
Kevin Wilds
This guy's a really.
Bill Simmons
40 videos in a row about it.
Kevin Wilds
This is a great guy.
Bill Simmons
It's like basically virtual signaling Instagram filter. I pay extra and then I just look like I'm like the best guy ever.
Kevin Wilds
Maybe it's just worthwhile even if no one ever sees it. Just for yourself, your own self worth.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So I don't have to actually look at what the algorithm says I like. Yeah. What's your next one?
Kevin Wilds
This is. I don't. Well, this goes back to Drake May. This goes back to this specific play that we already talked about. So if you didn't see the play, Drake May is trying to avoid a sack. He decides to try to either throw the ball out of bounds or throw the ball for incompletion. And while he's getting tackled, of course he cocks his arm back and the ball falls out. Classic. Doing too much. Classic Mac Jonesian play. And so the half baked idea is this. Everybody brings in motivational speakers, right? To these teams. Like, holy cow, this guy, this woman did all this amazing stuff. The motivational speaker that Mike Rabel needs to bring in. And this happens every six weeks. Oh, A plane going from Paris to New York had to land in the Azores. Something wasn't right.
Bill Simmons
Okay.
Kevin Wilds
This plane was going from New York to Miami. Uh. Oh. Had to land in Dulles. Something was wrong. And that, you know, the pilot gets out and he gets razzed by his buddies. Ah, you could have made it. Yeah. Timmy, you're scared to fly with, you know, gas gauge. You know, you just tap on it, it'll work. You win. Beard on you. And Timmy's gonna get up there. It's like, you know what? Yeah. Everybody made fun of me, but guess what, old Timmy the pilot didn't do. Lose the plane or lose anybody's life. Stop trying to do heroic stuff. Take the sack, tuck it, fall down. It's several. And then another pilot. Hey, my name's John. I was on a flight from Dallas to Kansas City. I had to land it in Oklahoma City. You know what? It wasn't perfect. I lived to fly another day. If Drake may starts doing heroic stuff, I'm gonna have Mac Jonesy and I'm gonna lose my mind. I'm just gonna go crazy.
Bill Simmons
So you had the pilot come in and be like, you know, Captain Sully. You don't know me.
Kevin Wilds
Exactly.
Bill Simmons
We were flying to Hawaii. Somebody got sick on the plane. They turned us around and got us back to la.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
And everyone was safe.
Kevin Wilds
Yep. And everybody was pissed off. But guess what? I was right.
Bill Simmons
No news story the next day. But guess what? Everybody lived.
Kevin Wilds
And you know what the best play is? The play you don't make. There's no movie about me. I didn't get a raise. In fact, I got penalized.
Bill Simmons
It's the anti Captain Sully. I like that.
Kevin Wilds
It's. That's what we need. Don't do dumb stuff, Drake May. You're so close to being great. This idea is not even an idea. It's just two words. But I feel like there's something there. What do you think? Well, I just wrote LeBron Golf. Those are two words. What do you think about LeBron's golfing journey?
Bill Simmons
So I know somebody, a good friend of mine is at the same club as we're. LeBron goes. So I won't name the club, but apparently he's there every, every day, just like I want with his son. Some of the times, too, it feels like there's.
Kevin Wilds
I just assume there's lots of guys like me who are like, have kind of missed the golfing window and need a reason to do it. But I'm not, you know, it's like anything. It's like, hey, I'm just gonna start golfing randomly. My wife's gonna be like, what? Why is there clubs here? Why are you in the garage all the time? But I feel like LeBron is like my entryway. Like, oh, yeah, LeBron started golfing with his son. Maybe I'll do that. It just feels like there's.
Bill Simmons
Either you might inspire a whole nation.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, it's. I don't know if it's a reality. It feels bigger than a reality. It feels like a platform. It's like he's out there and I'm rooting for him. And he's like, hey, can you golf as good as LeBron? And I don't know, it just feels like there's something for Nike to do or for him to do to get a lot of people into golf.
Bill Simmons
Well, the thing is, it's like the best version of a midlife crisis. Right. When one of your friends starts playing golf, I'm always, like, jealous. It's the opposite. Well, because it's just like, man, that's great. I would. I would love to just spend the summer trying to see how good I could get at golf.
Kevin Wilds
And then, like, his buddies, like, step and then they're just. It was very. Just like normal guys at work and like, Steph's like, hey, been waiting for you. It just felt very normal. Like, I want to be in this, man. I was like, hey, how's it feeling today, LeBron?
Bill Simmons
First great social media thing he's done in a while. Like, I'm invested in too. I want to know, like, I want to see his shots. I want to see one of the greatest athletes we have ever had. How easy would it be for him to just be good at golf?
Shield Kapadia
Yes.
Kevin Wilds
How good is he going to get? I don't even know anything about golf.
Bill Simmons
And he's like, well, he's too tall. Everyone says, like, oh, and that was like the Jordan issue too. No, I mean, to be really good, he's good. But I think when you get past like, six, four, that's why when you, you see all the, like, the really good golfers, like, once you get over six, four, it gets hard because you just have more. You have a longer body. There's more ways that could go wrong on a swing. Right. That's why there's no right. There's no, like seven foot golfer they're like, oh, look, Croatia's churning out these tall golfers. This is revolutionizing golf.
Kevin Wilds
Too busy playing basketball.
Bill Simmons
It's almost like the running back position. Like, the running backs look like the best, most successful type of running back is always going to be like Trevian Henderson or Saquon Barkley. Like that kind of body. So six, eight for six. What's he, six, eight and a half for golf.
Kevin Wilds
It's.
Bill Simmons
It's hard.
Kevin Wilds
It's even better. Then it's even more of a strong.
Bill Simmons
You brought this up. I'm also invested in LeBron's golf and I want to see how good he can get. It'd be funny if he was just like, I'm going to shoot a 75 by December.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
Like, could he do it?
Kevin Wilds
There's also like a whole Jordan element to it. Like, if he gets better at golf than Jordan or maybe they get together in golf and it's this great thing that won't happen. I'm just really into LeBron golfing. I'm like, shocked at how into it I am.
Bill Simmons
Speaking of NBA legends, I have a quick one. So I've noticed that, you know, every player, every X player has a podcast at this point. And Kobe gets thrown around a lot. Like stories about Kobe, these interactions they had with Kobe or Kobe helping them out.
Kevin Wilds
Legendary. Yeah. His legend continues to grow.
Bill Simmons
Kobe, one of the things I liked about him when he played was he kind of didn't want to be friends with anybody. He was pretty famous for that. Like, he was pretty cutthroat in a fun way and wanted to destroy everybody else and famously didn't have a lot of friends and wasn't one of those, what are you doing after the game guys? And even at the Olympics, I think he kind of stayed on his own. I suggest. I think it's like a PI, but it's not even like a full time job. It's Kobe detector. Anytime somebody on a podcast tells some Kobe Bryant story, I just think it should be investigated. I want to find out if it's actually true or not. Because my guard is always up with every where. He's like, man. Then Kobe called me one night and I was in a big shooting slump and Kobe saw it and he noticed and he called me out and I'm just like, I don't know if I believe this.
Kevin Wilds
Wow.
Bill Simmons
I just don't think he did.
Kevin Wilds
I'm believing them all.
Bill Simmons
You believe them all. But. But it's gotten to the point where I feel like anybody can say anything.
Kevin Wilds
It all Feels within his. I haven't heard one that I feel. Feels out of bounds, like the Chandler parson. Have you heard the Chandler Parsons one? What was that one that Chandler Parsons that they. They. He was on. I forgot. What team drive was he on? The Grizzlies, maybe the channel. You just cut to Chandler Parsons telling the story, obviously, but he. They were like, you got to guard Kobe. So he's, like, very intimidating. Kobe was, like, giving him, like, icy glares the whole game. But then eventually he was like, are you guys going out?
Shield Kapadia
Like, I'll.
Kevin Wilds
I'll set you up somewhere. And Kobe sent him. He's like, yeah. And Kobe said. Told him to go to some restaurant. And then the bill came, and it was like this monstrous bill. And Chandler Parsons.
Bill Simmons
I've heard this story.
Kevin Wilds
And then he's like, no, Mr. Brian is taking care of it, but Kobe wasn't there. That's why I like the story.
Bill Simmons
It's like, no, see, this is why we need code. So this. Maybe it's a podcast. Kobe Detector. There's a Kobe story. And. And the host is just like, all right, time for a deep dive. It's a little like Pablo's podcast.
Kevin Wilds
Every quote. I just love every story. Just every story. I like. I have one more. It's. This is not even.
Bill Simmons
I have one more as well.
Kevin Wilds
I have one more. The Savannah Bananas.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I watched an hour of them. That's how bad the sports content's been this summer. I watched an hour trying to figure it out. It's pretty entertaining. It was like Harlem Globetrotters for baseball.
Kevin Wilds
That's exactly what I have. Also an argument against parody. It's the best argument for, like, you know what? We're going to be awesome. We're going to be so awesome. We'll be doing backflips and catching the ball at the same time. So when anybody wants to start a league, just pick anywhere professional. Let's pickleball. Pick one out of the air. And it's like, all right, we're going to have all these teams from all these places, and they're all going to have a real challenge and all, like, it'll be. Everyone thinks it's the NFL model where parody works. No, have your pickleball league and put Pete Sampras and Roger Federer on one team and a bunch of regular guys on the other team and have them crush. That's what how it works. That's how sports works. Hey, you know what's good? The New York Yankees with Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig. And they won 20 some odd championship. We like that. Oh, the Celtics, we like that. That's how leagues get started. Dynasties in one team crushing. Not just like oh, they're all good. Like hey, who won the Frisbee Frisbee football championship?
Bill Simmons
So you want to, you want a lower class for leagues?
Kevin Wilds
No, I just want, I want a normal league but with a stacked. I'm anti parody.
Bill Simmons
Me too.
Kevin Wilds
I don't want parody. This is really filtering.
Bill Simmons
We grew up with 80s NBA where it was like there was four teams.
Kevin Wilds
So this is my most impassioned. You'll like this.
Bill Simmons
You're a sports Republican.
Kevin Wilds
By, by not allowing, you know, putting a cap on compensation for superstars.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
You are not only in the, in the effort to have parity in the league. What you're actually doing is putting a cap on the excellence of the sport. Like we still haven't seen the best basketball team ever.
Bill Simmons
Like just the closest we came in this century was the 2017 warriors who achieved it by this complete salary cap fluke combined with Curry's contract. And then that was probably the best team we've seen.
Kevin Wilds
Yes. So like and it brought basketball to another level. Like what's the next level of basketball look like? We're not actually going to get a chance to see it because we don't have the best talent playing together. So then when you have the Olympics, like sure, but that's kind of like tossed together. But like the, the best basketball is still like what is the Manhattan Project of basketball? Where like Here are the 10 greatest basketball players. What does that look like? What are we going to unlock? Like I'm there, that's what I want to see. But now it's like no, we take the 10 best players. They're all on separate teams. Everyone gets a bite at the apple. It's like it hurts the sport, the sport's potential. It's a very, very heady half baked idea. I don't even know if that baked idea.
Bill Simmons
What was the idea?
Kevin Wilds
I don't know. That you need to get rid of.
Bill Simmons
The seller cap and have more Savannah bananas.
Kevin Wilds
You need to have like one superstar. My dad used to always tell me about the team. What was it called? The King and his Court. You hear about the Cane and his court. They're a softball team. Like yeah, we're just four guys. I don't even think they played four on nine or something. I forgot what it was. But we just, we're so good. I just want to see the best. I just want to see the absolute Best to have the NBA be the best basketball. But not actually because we've dispersed it so far and it doesn't make sense for anybody. Like you want to see great basketball, Someone's going to have to be paid. $30 million less than they deserve is nuts. So I just, I'm still waiting to see great basketball. I don't know how.
Bill Simmons
Now we're never seeing it.
Kevin Wilds
That's not.
Bill Simmons
The half baked idea is actually just a fully baked idea is let's not have a salary cap in the NBA anymore.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, let's see. Awesome.
Bill Simmons
Let's go nuts.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah, yeah, I'm for that. Like soccer. Guess what? It's awesome. All the great players are playing together.
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah, that is true.
Kevin Wilds
It's. Guess what. The whole sport looks different. It looks awesome now. It's maybe we would maybe would break free from, you know, layups and threes. If you put great players on the team and they figured out something brand new. I'm viewing it like a AI experiment. I don't know that one got off the track.
Bill Simmons
That went sideways. But I enjoyed it. I was the most excited for this one.
Kevin Wilds
This is your Michael Parsons one.
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
Okay, here we go.
Bill Simmons
So the Michael Parsons things happen. And obviously you had to do probably 100 segments on it because there was nothing going on.
Kevin Wilds
We're all over it.
Bill Simmons
It was interesting. All the ex players who are on these shows, it goes to them like, yeah, pay him. Yeah, pay him. He's Michael Parsons. You gotta pay him.
Kevin Wilds
Yeah.
Bill Simmons
And that was kind of the ex player take across the board. And I was thinking like, you know how they have cameo where the celebrities. You could be like, it's Kevin Wilds's birthday. And Steven Seagal sent Kevin Wilds a birthday message. Hey, Kevin, it's Steven Seagal. Love your stuff. This is like cameo, but it's with actual daily talk shows. So first things first, for $1,000, I'm working in a hardware store and the assistant manager wants a raise and they won't give him a raise. And the assistant manager goes to first things first cameo. And he's like, can you guys do a segment about how I've been here for three years?
Kevin Wilds
We lay out all the arguments and.
Bill Simmons
You'D be like, hey, Bob's been there three years, the store's up 20%, you gotta pay him. And you guys just go around and then you guys just. You do pay them for all these people around the world. And then there's one tenured professors at like, you know, Middlebury College.
Kevin Wilds
Love it. We Did a lot of research for it, and we're, like, ready to go.
Bill Simmons
And there's, like, passionately talking about how they should pay him. And then they sent. They sends a video to his boss and was like, if you saw this, Kevin Wilds and Nick Wright and Broussard were talking about, I should be.
Kevin Wilds
Also, there's one person that has to, like, be the sacrificial lamb. I don't know. I wouldn't pay him. I. I wouldn't pay. And he just gets crushed.
Bill Simmons
I don't know. If you look at the Nescac schools.
Kevin Wilds
It'S like tenured professors, that data is outdated. You're like, what?
Bill Simmons
What?
Kevin Wilds
Like, you just get crushed. Like, oh, man. I. Now you put it that way. So it has a little bit of an arc to it. Oh, that's smart.
Bill Simmons
Actually, you know that Trump, with the not letting international students in, tuition's down. There's less money for the school. We can't have tenured. And he was like, no, stop it. That's bullshit. The guy's doing a good job. You should get more money. You got to pay him. And we just simulate that with all walks of all walks of American workforce.
Kevin Wilds
That's a great take. That's a nice auxiliary piece of ink. The challenge here. And this is why I like it. Cause it's half baked.
Bill Simmons
Yeah. How do you get the shows to actually do this?
Kevin Wilds
No, no. Couldn't do it on our free time. The person who. It's a real gamble for them because they already need more money. Right. They're already underpaid. Then they're gonna have to pay us to do it.
Bill Simmons
Right.
Kevin Wilds
So, you know, it's not super lucrative. There's actually. I hate to say it, there's probably more money in the not paying. They're like, look, we gotta give this guy a $50,000 bump. We pay you guys 5 grand for a segment. Caught him down.
Bill Simmons
It's like a commission. Yeah.
Kevin Wilds
You're like, oh, gosh darn it.
Bill Simmons
Maybe this is where AI is going, where we could just AI the pay him thing. What's the scenario where the X players wouldn't want the guy to get paid? Does that happen yet? I guess maybe Bradley Beal for Bradley Beal.
Kevin Wilds
You don't want to, like, run into the same guy at the restaurant. Like, why did you try to convince people not to pay me $20 million? Sorry. We just needed to do content that day.
Bill Simmons
Sorry. I needed a. Zach, let me buy you.
Kevin Wilds
Let me buy you a bottle of wine. Like, no.
Bill Simmons
All right. Have baked ideas. We've done it again.
Kevin Wilds
That was great.
Bill Simmons
You stayed up late on Sunday night for me. I appreciate it. We talked about friendship, restaurants. It's really sports golf all over the place. All right. Wow. It's good to see you. We can see on five years. Yeah, let me know. Give me no notice at all and just come on over. I'll be here.
Kevin Wilds
I'll see you 2030.
Bill Simmons
All right. Thanks, Wild. All right, that's it for the podcast. Thanks to Shield and Wilds. Thanks to Gahau and Eduardo as well. I have another podcast coming probably Thursday. It's going to be a good one. And then I have rewatchables Monday night, Rollerball, 50th anniversary of the second great sports movie that we've had in the last 50 years. The first one's Longest Yard, 1974, Rollerball 1975. And then we're off. We have a nice little sports movie. Boom. So Bryan Kopham and I, we covered everything really, really, really, really kooky podcast. So I highly recommend it. That is coming and I will see you later in the week on this podcast. Must be 21 plus in President select states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star Casino or 18 + in President D.C. kentucky or Wyoming. Gambling problem. Call 100 Gambler or visit rg-help.com, call 1-887-897777 or visit ccpg.org/chat in Connecticut or visit mdgamblinghelp.org in Maryland. Hope is here. Visit gamblinghelplinema.org or call 800-32750 for 24. 7 support in Massachusetts or call 1-877-8-HOPE NY or text HOPE NY in New York.
The Bill Simmons Podcast – Episode Summary
Title: A 2025 NFL QB Pyramid, and Half-Baked Ideas (Summer Edition) With Sheil Kapadia and Kevin Wildes
Release Date: August 11, 2025
Host: Bill Simmons
Guests: Sheil Kapadia, Kevin Wildes
Publisher: The Ringer
In this episode of The Bill Simmons Podcast, host Bill Simmons delves deep into his projected quarterback (QB) rankings for the 2025 NFL season, alongside Sheil Kapadia, a prominent NFL analyst, and Kevin Wildes, a national sports commentator. The discussion intertwines rigorous analysis of top-tier quarterbacks with lighter segments featuring "half-baked ideas," showcasing the show's signature blend of sports insight and casual banter.
Bill Simmons introduces his ongoing project: a QB pyramid forecasting the top quarterbacks for the upcoming season. He starts by challenging conventional rankings, placing Josh Allen at the pinnacle of his pyramid—a decision that surprises many listeners given Patrick Mahomes' stellar performance in previous years.
"I just think Josh Allen's the best quarterback in the league, game by game. Regular season durability... physically, he's dominant." [17:06]
Sheil Kapadia supports Simmons' unconventional ranking by emphasizing Allen's consistency and the health of the Philadelphia Eagles' roster.
"Every Eagles team I've watched my entire life... they have A.J. Brown, Saquon, Hertz, Jalen Carter—all pros all over the place." [07:42]
Bill Simmons elaborates on his reasoning, critiquing Mahomes' recent performance and arguing that Josh Allen's all-around gameplay makes him superior in his view.
"I feel like he's the best guy in the league now... I don't think it's fair to put him over Josh Allen." [18:49]
The conversation shifts to discuss potential pitfalls and emerging talents within the quarterback landscape:
Matthew Stafford: Simmons expresses concern over Stafford's age and declining performance, questioning his readiness and future impact.
"I've been studying trying to figure out Super Bowl picks... Matthew Stafford... he's not looking like he's going to be ready for week one." [13:57]
Justin Herbert: A significant portion is dedicated to debating Herbert's current standing. Simmons criticizes Herbert's underperformance last season, attributing it to poor team dynamics and offensive support, while Kapadia acknowledges Herbert's capabilities but stresses the need for consistent performance against top-tier defenses.
"They're throwing it six yards because they can't come up with anything else." [22:56]
Joe Burrow and Lamar Jackson: Both are acknowledged as top contenders. Simmons maintains that Burrow's inclusion in the top tier is justified despite not having an MVP award, while Jackson's dual-threat capability keeps him competitive.
"They have a chance to be pretty good, where if they rack up a bunch of wins... they could be a Super Bowl contender." [11:03]
Eagles: With a robust offensive line and elite skill players like A.J. Brown and Jalen Hurts, the Eagles are positioned as favorites. Kapadia notes the team's defensive adjustments but remains confident in their Super Bowl prospects.
"I still think they’re going to be very good... but if the schedule’s hard and the defense could take us." [06:52]
Packers: Kapadia and Simmons discuss the Packers' potential, highlighting Jordan Love's growth and Matt LaFleur's underrated coaching.
"If some of those guys get better this year, I do think there’s a case for the Packers." [16:00]
Others: The conversation also touches on teams like the 49ers, Lions, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, and Cleveland Browns, analyzing their strengths and vulnerabilities.
"The Lions have the second-best odds in the NFC right now... and Stafford is a big question mark." [13:57]
Simmons and Kapadia collaboratively build the QB pyramid, debating the placement of various quarterbacks based on performance metrics, team support, and potential for growth. They discuss QBs such as Jordan Love, Dak Prescott, Jalen Hurts, and emerging talents like Daniel Jones and Trevor Lawrence.
"If you switch Josh Allen with Patrick Mahomes, the Chiefs offense might have been better with that version of Allen last season." [22:56]
Kapadia introduces Sheil Kapadia’s insights, agreeing with many of Simmons' placements while offering alternative viewpoints, especially regarding Dak Prescott and Jordan Love.
"I like the Packers as a zag team. I think if I had to name three teams..., definitely four there." [16:00]
In a departure from the intense QB analysis, Kevin Wildes leads a light-hearted segment featuring "half-baked ideas." This segment includes humorous takes on restaurant experiences and playful notions about enhancing sports events.
Huge Font Restaurant: A satirical concept where restaurant menus use excessively large fonts, making it difficult for patrons to read without squinting.
"Maybe it's called Huge Font Restaurant? Maybe, but I would like to dance around it a little bit more." [83:11]
Preseason Enhancements: Wildes and Simmons brainstorm ideas to make preseason games more engaging, such as introducing unique quarterback performances or special guest appearances to boost fan interest.
"Your field goal kicker thing is a really interesting idea. So Bucker's warming up in the place." [92:36]
Their creative brainstorming highlights the show's ability to blend serious sports discourse with entertaining, off-the-cuff ideas.
Interspersed within the main discussions, Simmons and Wildes engage in a candid conversation about maintaining friendships as adults, touching on the challenges of coordinating social gatherings and the shift from active friendships to more distant, yet genuine connections.
"Guys are just bad at it... we just have to make a concerted effort." [70:32]
This segment adds a personal touch to the podcast, resonating with listeners navigating similar social landscapes.
Bill Simmons wraps up the episode by promoting upcoming content, including a special movie rewatch of the 50th anniversary of Rollerball, and teases future podcasts focusing more on football as the season approaches.
"We're getting dangerously close to 400 movies... Rollerball and then doing a more modern movie." [00:00 - 06:09]
Bill Simmons on Josh Allen:
"I just think Josh Allen's the best quarterback in the league, game by game. Regular season durability, the fact that he doesn't... he gets to where he runs away." [17:06]
Sheil Kapadia on Eagles' Roster:
"What's your Hertz Philly relationship right now?... everybody's just behind him and are like, everybody else doesn't get it with this guy. He's our guy, and he's going to go do it again." [09:02]
Bill Simmons Critiquing Mahomes:
"I don't put, I put pretty much nothing on him... they just have a rocket of an arm." [22:56]
Kevin Wildes on Preseason and Followers:
"I just look for the peaks and valleys. And that was a definite peak." [89:40]
This episode stands out for its in-depth analysis of quarterback performances and projections, coupled with the engaging dynamic between Bill Simmons, Sheil Kapadia, and Kevin Wildes. The blend of serious sports strategy with humorous and relatable segments offers a comprehensive listening experience for both dedicated football fans and casual listeners alike.
Disclaimer: This summary is based on a provided transcript and aims to capture the essence of the podcast episode. For full details and nuanced discussions, listening to the original episode is recommended.