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The Bill Simmons Podcast
Game 7 Baseball Magic, Josh Beats Pat, Seattle’s Rise, Cincy’s Fall, and Guess the Lines With Cousin Sal
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- [00:01]
Bill Simmons
This episode is brought to you by Uber Eats. Every time I sit down and watch the game, I find myself getting a little hungry. Football and food, they just go together. Luckily, Uber Eats has game day deals all season long on the food you love. Like right now, you can score a Bogo KFC three piece chicken big box. Whether you're ordering from your favorite restaurant or getting snacks from the grocery store, Uber Eats has you covered for game day. Order now on Uber Eats promotion available until November 9th. Product availability varies by region. See app for details. Terms apply. The Bill Simmons Podcast brought to you by FanDuel Sportsbook we're also brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network where I have a new rewatchables coming for you. On Monday night, we did the Truman Show. We did it with me and Chris Ryan and a very, very special guest. It is a pretty famous celebrity and when we have the celebrities on, you never know how it's going to go. But this one went great. Really, really good. You're going to be surprised. So that's coming Monday night. Looking forward to that. Want to tell you about a new podcast that we are launching in November and this is a surprising one. It is a sports and culture podcast, but mostly sports, with Max Kellerman and Rich Paul. And there's a whole story behind this that I can explain really quickly. I'm sure we'll talk more about this over the next couple weeks, but I've wanted to work with Max for a long, long time. And when his ESPN stuff went the way that it did and he was basically, he was on the sidelines there for almost a year and a half and I was waiting, waiting for him to potentially become available. And when it finally happened, we started talking after he did the Netflix boxing thing and I was like, we gotta do something. He was like, well, I'm a little bit down the road with this other idea. And it was this show that he had been thinking about with. As it turned out, it was Rich Paul and they've been friends for a while. They've always wanted to do something like a back and forth kind of the kind of ringer type show that we would do, like conversation show, chemistry show. And I was like, rich Paul, he's running clutch, he's an entrepreneur, he's doing all these different things. How is he going to have time and the wherewithal to do a podcast? So I did what I usually do in these situations. I just met with them and we went out to lunch and we talked for two hours. I didn't really know Rich that well, and I think he didn't think I liked him. I didn't think he liked me, and that got hashed out in 10 minutes. And more importantly, just watching the way they interacted, I became convinced, like, oh, these guys, I get it. These guys should have a show. So I think it's going to be three days a week. It's going to be sports, they might have some special guests. And Max, I don't have to sell you on. I think Max is great. I'm really excited to be in a situation where we came the kind of platform and the support, and I just always felt like if he was on the right team, he would crush. So you have that piece and then Rich's side. He's obviously a really busy guy. He's got a lot of commitments, but there's a perspective that he has and a chemistry, especially with Max, that I just think is really unique for a podcast and for a conversation that you'd want to listen to. If you think the whole concept of why a podcast would work is it's like you're like a fly on a wall, listen to two people who really know their shit talking about stuff, and you're just kind of there listening. And I think that's what he thinks too. That's what he wants to flip the sports talk thing on its head a little bit and bring some real thought perspective on sports, business, people, all these different things. And I think we all feel pretty good about how that he can do a really good podcast while also doing all these other jobs that he has. So I don't know I'm going to trust my instincts on this one. When people have chemistry, that's usually what makes a podcast work over and over again. We've seen it back at Granlin at the Ringer, all these different places, and this is one that I really think is going to be a cool podcast. And I'm excited for and I'm excited for them. So we're going to be launching it later this year, it's going to be. Or later this month, it's going to be a video podcast. Max Kellerman, Rich Paul, sports, guests, culture, all this stuff. And I think it's going to be really good. So stay tuned. We will have a feed, we'll have a bigger announcement, we'll have a launch date, all that stuff. So stay tuned for that. We're gonna take a break on this podcast. We're gonna bring a pro jam, and then cousin Sal and I are going to talk About Week Week 9. Week 9. Week 9. NFL and a lot of things happen. Stay tuned. This episode of the Bill Simmons Podcast is presented by State Farm. Having insurance isn't the same as having State Farm. It's like needing the protection offensive guard on the football field, but getting an elementary school crossing guard. I had that last year with the Patriots. This year I have actual protection. Sure, they're both guards, but you can only trust one to keep your quarterback safe when the game is on the line. So don't settle for just any insurance when you can have State Farm like a good neighbor. State Farm is there all right. Live on a Sunday night, the BS Podcast. Cousin Sal is here. We're gonna guess the lines. We're gonna talk about a whole bunch of stuff. Right before we came on, Jaden Daniels got hurt. He looked like he dislocated his elbow.
- [05:51]
Cousin Sal
It's not our fault. Are you blaming us?
- [05:53]
Bill Simmons
No, I'm just saying this is why we were delayed on YouTube. We were going to come earlier, but he went down and it did not look great. And it was not a great night for the Washington Commanders. We will talk about that later. I'm going to do something we've Never done in 18 years of guest alliance. What was that? Start talking about another sport. To start the podcast, we got to go backwards.
- [06:13]
Cousin Sal
Not basketball, though, not baseball.
- [06:16]
Bill Simmons
I want to talk baseball. I want to talk about last night. Dodgers going back to back. One of the great baseball games. I think of my lifetime and yours. Right? That's on the. I don't know what the greatest is. I don't know. You know, I almost feel like it's actors. Like you could say Meryl Streep's the greatest actress ever. But if you said greatest actor, you could probably list six or seven. We've had some great baseball games in the World Series in our day, right. Jack Morris, that World Series 07, Cleveland, Florida was awesome. The Arizona Yankees game was awesome, that 2016 Cubs game. So there's been some good ones. This one had everything though. And I think when you combine the other three losses or the other two losses that Toronto had, I think this was a uniquely awful experience for Blue Jays fans. I can't come up with another loss like this. Right. For the. The culmination started with the 18 inning game to now. So I want to start with the loss and then go to the win. But if that had been the Mets, where would you be able to do the podcast tonight?
- [07:16]
Cousin Sal
No, I don't think so. Even a day removed. Yeah, it's. It's as bad as it gets. And you know, there was already the stink of Game 7, Toronto. Right. For the city and the hockey team can never get past game seven. And it's one of those series where you think, wow, should they have just lost to Seattle in six, like, would that have been better?
- [07:34]
Bill Simmons
Would that have been better for them.
- [07:36]
Cousin Sal
Emotionally showing up like and then up three two and then up three three nothing in game seven, which your Red Sox were up three nothing to my Mets. You weren't home at the time, but it was really eerily reminiscent. I kept thinking of you, but so you think this, you thought game seven was better than the, the one you went through the 18 inning game or it's just the best game seven you've ever seen.
- [07:57]
Bill Simmons
I think I'm talking game sevens.
- [07:59]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [08:00]
Bill Simmons
With the drama of bringing in the baggage from the 18 in a game from Game 6 when it seemed like they had it, they're bringing in glass now, basically, you know, they third and second. It just seems like they're. Something good's gonna happen for them. And all of a sudden the game's over. Guy gets doubled off off second, announcers gloss over it. I'm still trying to figure out why he drifted over that far on a ball that Kik caught like this.
- [08:23]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [08:23]
Bill Simmons
But, but then going up three nothing, having it in the ninth, having Hoffman as this giant wart on your body that you're just hoping nobody picks. Oh, I had him in the Al keep. I was just waiting for him to do that. Right. And then who hits the homer to tie it? And then, and then what happened? How the game ended, how the, the instant replay has, has there ever been a closer instant replay where the time.
- [08:47]
Cousin Sal
Didn'T get a single cleat? And that's. Look, with these seven game series and you'll run into the same thing with a great basketball series. But when there's a series unlike the super bowl and like Atlanta fans will be like 28, three. I could point to 16 things that happened.
- [09:01]
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
- [09:01]
Cousin Sal
But when you have like a nine or ten day series and you lose so close like you could point to a hundred things like you Blue Jays fans, I can't imagine what they're going through. In that 18 inning game. There were six thing six base running errors that everybody made. And then as you talk about the cleat and the double play and it just. Well, was he leading off third too much? And now all these major league baseballs are coming to kind of defense like I don't even know how I'D be able to handle this. As a Mets fan, it's as bad as loss as you'll find.
- [09:33]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I remember when I, when I wrote about the game six of the 86 World Series. One of the great moments of your life.
- [09:40]
Cousin Sal
Oh, yeah, let's hear about this.
- [09:41]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, all the different moments where the Red Sox could have finished the game off, right? And the, the reverse of that was when the Patriots came back against the Falcons 23. And I think it was like 15 plays where if any play had gone differently, Atlanta's way, they win. Like most famously the Julio Jones when they had the catch, but then they somehow go backwards and have to punt instead of kicking a field goal. But there's a million of those and I think those are the worst ones. As sports fans, those are the ones that still haunt me. Like the, the Celtics in game four of the 87 finals being up six with two minutes left. And I can still remember the entire sequence where we lost the lead where it's just like that play, that play. And you just think about it. In a way, it's way worse than it is. Better to win. You're. You're more haunted by the loss than.
- [10:27]
Cousin Sal
You are, no question.
- [10:28]
Bill Simmons
Celebration of the win.
- [10:29]
Cousin Sal
You're just relieved. You're just relieved on your win. And then, you know, on top of all that stuff, all the plays that came down to a quarter of an inch or this or that or this weird decision, they're up against like this Halloween zombie in Yamamoto who pitched game two, Game six. And like, all right, we've had enough of him. Game seven. And like raises his hand to volunteer for games before that too. Like, what the hell is going on here? How do you have such an intense force on the other side and how do you keep combating that? And they just couldn't.
- [11:00]
Bill Simmons
I guess that's never happened, right? Like, what was Baumgartner, the situation with him at the Giants, it wasn't like the next day him pitching 40 pitches, was it? I don't remember that. This was like, I just thought when somebody started a game and threw 90 plus pitches, we did not get to see that person. The next day, that person's just scratched. And Fox was never showing the available pitchers, which I don't understand how that's not a graphic. We got to see the Joe Carter Homer 397 times in the graphic and game winning homers and all this stuff. And they were so concerned with the history of everything and not just telling us, like, here, who's. Here's who's left for the Dodgers? Kershaw. Like Kershaw got up in extra innings and was like, oh my God, can you imagine? Yeah, can you imagine if he has to come in and pitch during this? But I felt so bad for the, for the Blue Jays.
- [11:53]
Cousin Sal
If Luke's doesn't swing at ball four, Toronto wins that 18 inning game that you were at. By the way, congratulations for sticking it through. You're one of the big, one of the great Dodger fans out there. I think I'd have to say at.
- [12:03]
Bill Simmons
This point it was great to be there with the other Dodger fans. Well, I was thinking the difference with this Blue Jays loss is the three together. I don't remember that in a seven game series for a baseball team before three horrible losses.
- [12:18]
Cousin Sal
Oh yeah.
- [12:18]
Bill Simmons
The 18 inning game alone is like the worst loss you're going to have in five years.
- [12:23]
Cousin Sal
Right? Yeah, right.
- [12:24]
Bill Simmons
And then the blowing game six when everybody goes there, everybody thinks they have it in the bag. And then it seems multiple points during that game, they're going to win that one. And then game seven when they went up three, nothing. I remember that Cardinals, the World series like in 85 when Andohar flipped out and the Royals just killed them like 11. I really started to wonder like is this going to be like a blowout or the Blue Jays just going to kill them like the Dodgers? It felt like the Blue Jays were a slightly better team and the Dodgers were just going to, they were hanging on, hanging on, doing it all in DNA and then eventually was going to run out and then the long run.
- [12:59]
Cousin Sal
Game went every two innings. They'd get a run and they'd come back there and for like to get beaten. It's one thing that like they must have been like, what the fuck is going on here? Yamamoto is a robot. And then you got this guy who hasn't had a hit in a month. It's a home run against us to go ahead. Right. And then the, the back to back plays with the cleat on the plate and then the collision Hernandez and like that was insane. That, that, that ball didn't drop. That ball drops 90 times out of 100. Yeah.
- [13:29]
Bill Simmons
I don't know what the rankings are for me, but it's hard to think of a more dramatic game seven that just had like crazy plays. Like the collision play alone would have been, would have been enough to carry the craziness for the game because it's conceivable that just could have ball could have dropped and they win the World Series. That way.
- [13:48]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [13:48]
Bill Simmons
And that. And I'm, I'm positive that's never happened before.
- [13:52]
Cousin Sal
No, not like that.
- [13:53]
Bill Simmons
No, that's never happened before.
- [13:55]
Cousin Sal
And then you think about it like The Dodgers hit 204 in the series, and they hit 203 last year against the Yankees, and they won both. They won last year convincingly. And it's like. And. But there was still a million great plays to talk about, even though they couldn't put the bat on the ball for, you know, 80% of the time.
- [14:13]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, that was the cool thing about game three. At least until when the next trainings was there were so many good defensive plays and baseline plays and, you know, it's just this higher level of, of the sport and you start comparing your own team to it. Like, I was texting on my Red Sox thread. I was like, how many? Doesn't this make us feel like we're a million miles away from this Dodgers team? Like they have four starting pitchers that we don't have. You know, we have like, no chance. We have no chance in a series like this. And, you know, some people were talking about how the Dodgers, well, they bought.
- [14:43]
Cousin Sal
This, blah, blah, blah.
- [14:45]
Bill Simmons
And it's like, well, you know, Vlad did sign a $500 million contract. They're not exactly going against Hickory High here. Toronto, you know, Toronto is spending money too, and they were doing trade deadline stuff. The Dodgers piece of this, though, back to back, really matters to me just as a sports fan and somebody who cares about this shit. I remember all the back to back teams like the Yankees doing it in 77 and 78 and the Reds doing it right before them, and then the Blue Jays did it and we're all kind of pissed off because that was right when baseball was starting to change. And we're like, oh, these motherfuckers, they kind of bought this a little bit. They had these hired guns. That's not. They didn't grow these players themselves. These weren't the homegrown stars and then the Yankees, obviously, but to do two in a row, I just feel like the stakes are down. You must feel that way about the Cowboys. I know I feel that way about the Pats. Like to win two in a row, that second one's so much harder. Well, you won more than two.
- [15:35]
Cousin Sal
Oh. Back in the day. Oh, I thought you meant that looking forward. Yeah, yeah.
- [15:38]
Bill Simmons
Back to back is just like. It's just. It's a. You're. You're planning your flag on a different planet.
- [15:44]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [15:45]
Bill Simmons
And I think they sensed that and they Understood it. And now they belong to this. Anyone can win one title, but you belong to a different kind of stratosphere, I think.
- [15:53]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I agree. And it's like. And you feel good for these Dodgers fans and there's gonna be a parade and it's like fireworks all over the place. It's like, yeah, this is pretty great. Then our producer Jack is like, hey, my seven year old has seen three championships since then. I'm like, I get the hell out of here.
- [16:06]
Bill Simmons
I don't want to hear from you.
- [16:07]
Cousin Sal
Enough. Off. Yeah, I'll pull the David Chang and tell you to. Off. No, we love Jack and his son, but it's enough.
- [16:13]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, no, that's. Listen, it's been a great, great run for them. Kershaw somehow got his last one. I'll never forget seeing him come into that 1880 game and how nervous everybody was. And when they showed him in the bullpen, I'm sure all the Dodger fans were like, oh, my God. On top of it. It was a Saturday night. Halloween, which isn't unusual for the sport. Halloween obviously isn't on Saturday every year, but sometimes it is and sometimes it overlaps with a great baseball game. But the combo, at least out here, it was like Halloween parties. The Dodgers are involved. This game's going late. This was like a water cooler moment. I do feel like baseball is in a slightly different place in the mainstream than it was pre Covid.
- [16:55]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [16:57]
Bill Simmons
Like something has shifted the pitch clock getting Ohtani and the Dodgers having like big market teams that I think people know some of the players, the sport being enjoyable, I think feel like kids. There's more kids kind of monitoring what's going on. The, the video game I think helps, but. But it just felt like. It felt like the sport we grew up with.
- [17:18]
Cousin Sal
I felt like the pitch clock is great because you still would have been at that 18 inning game that would have been a 40, you know, if there was no pitch clock. Greatest invention of our lifetime in sports, I think. And yeah. And you know what's sad? You say it's in a different place. It's going to be in a much different place next year when they strike. So that's going to suck. Don't. Just please try to get your shit together and ride the wave here because there's nothing better than baseball when it's played at the level we saw this last week.
- [17:44]
Bill Simmons
I'm glad you brought that up because we've seen them do this before with some of the worst timing ever for, for, for just the two Sides not being able to figure something out. I mean the salaries are definitely gigantic and they are. I know the RSNs have shifted and all that stuff, but if, if they damage whatever has been rebuilt here over the last five years, that would just be. I don't know if a lot of people would come back from that.
- [18:10]
Cousin Sal
Shame, shame on them.
- [18:11]
Bill Simmons
94, remember, it took, it took a couple years. It was really like some baby steps. It was like ripken that some of the big market teams got back involved like the Yankees and the Red Sox got pretty good again. Pedro went to the Red Sox.
- [18:26]
Cousin Sal
The Yankees kind of shitty until 97, until Sosa Maguire that like steroid the homer guys. Yeah, they needed that. They needed that for sure.
- [18:35]
Bill Simmons
But yeah, I felt like the, The Braves Yankees, 96. That World Series was good. The Cleveland, Florida, even though it was two weird teams, that World Series was awesome.
- [18:44]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [18:45]
Bill Simmons
And then, then we had The Bonds and McGuire and Sosa and all that stuff heading into the 90s. Red Sox versus Yankees. Like we had a really. And then all of a sudden it was back. And it feels like it's back now.
- [18:56]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [18:57]
Bill Simmons
So to, to blow this would just be unconscionable.
- [19:00]
Cousin Sal
Don't take it away. Don't do it. And by the way, next year is what the Olympics. So, you know, people will find something else to watch. They better not screw this up.
- [19:08]
Bill Simmons
They really better not. One other guy I wanted to shout out really quickly the catcher and the Dodgers, Will Smith, who caught all 18 innings in that game three and caught every inning of this series and then hits the game winning homer in Game 7. And I know Yamamoto had to be the MVP, but it almost feels like there should be an intercontinental champion mvp. There should be some sort of second thing that's awarded to somebody who just had a crazy impact on it. I think to, to watch him get up and, and, and then crouch and get up and crouch for seven solid hours. I was like, this guy's like, they're gonna have to send him to a fucking hospital in Germany to get him ready for game four. He never, never came out. It was unbelievable.
- [19:56]
Cousin Sal
Taking short hops to the thighs and everything. Chasing pitches and everything. Yeah, that is, that was a tough gig. I felt that that way too. He should have shot up the MVP rankings after that game. And I mean, just the idea that just. It was just a few years ago he was banned from the Academy Award. Oh no, that was a different one. Jeff Ross.
- [20:14]
Bill Simmons
It was.
- [20:15]
Cousin Sal
It's good to see Will Smith hitting something other than Chris Rock. I Don't know. There's a million jokes.
- [20:21]
Bill Simmons
And then Ohtani, who at some point during game three, it felt like this was going to be one of the watershed months in pro sports history for an athlete. And then by the end of it, he was just kind of barely hanging out as a supporting, you know, he got bailed out. He was out three nothing. Seemed like he had multiple chances to get those runs back and couldn't. And then his team picked him up. But it was just, it was interesting to watch his week evolved and then got my guy. Mookie was the other one who. They had to move him back in the batting order because he was kind of killing him. But at the same time was. It's just unbelievable to me that he plays shortstop. This guy went from center to right to. Or right to center to second base to shortstop. There's never been a career like this.
- [21:04]
Cousin Sal
You have to do it if you're a Dodger.
- [21:06]
Bill Simmons
And then he gets to double play to end the, end the series, just.
- [21:09]
Cousin Sal
SM ear to ear, smiles as soon as he fielded the ball like you did feel good for him. The one more thing I want to say about that 18 inning game, as great as that was, and that, that's the pinnacle of sports.
- [21:21]
Bill Simmons
18 innings.
- [21:21]
Cousin Sal
And you see that guy Klein, who hadn't thrown 60 pitches through college, and oh my God, he's just mowing these guys down. Unbelievable. There's Dodgers 10th pitcher that like the biggest difference between my team and you and, and the team that's in there, you. They have pitcher number 10 is throwing 99 on the corner, right? Like in the. And the announcers are barely mentioning it. But how that could have gone from great to absurd if we saw your guy Mookie BETTS Pitching the 19th inning or the 20th inning, like, oh my God, that would have been ridiculous, right? Like, then you're like, ah, shit, this sucks. Like, you know, imagine if Ramandre Stevenson is the quarterback of the Patriots because the game went too long, you know, so what do you do?
- [22:01]
Bill Simmons
Do you do like, by the 18th inning you put started a guy on second base. I don't, like, I don't think you can mess with the history of this.
- [22:08]
Cousin Sal
I did miss the ghost runner a little bit. A little bit.
- [22:12]
Bill Simmons
I mean, sitting there just watching everybody go, just zeros for three solid hours was, you know, the bull.
- [22:19]
Cousin Sal
Good idea. Ohtani. Maybe the fourth time he was intentionally walked, he can get second base, like, right? At least one more. One more base. You know, you're not allowed to throw the first so many times they could fudge that rule a little bit.
- [22:32]
Bill Simmons
What's the most nerve wracking sport to you of all the sports? Is it baseball? I just think for like situation like that. Or is it hockey?
- [22:41]
Cousin Sal
No, it's sudden death hockey.
- [22:43]
Bill Simmons
Or is it like an extra innings baseball game with everything at stake?
- [22:46]
Cousin Sal
It's, it's gotta be hockey because there's no your team. Okay. If your team's up at bat, you're not gonna get scored on in baseball. Right. So you have that at least it's end to end rush and hockey. Like you could, you could be on a power play and get scored on in three seconds, you know, because it's back and forth and back and forth. So it has to be hockey. But the way baseball is shot and directed and the way they'll like, you know, a lot of times it's cold, the pitcher blowing out his hand, they go to the dugout, the shots of the fans. You cannot me match that intensity because you have so much time in between pitches.
- [23:19]
Bill Simmons
Baseball also has that unbelievable piece where it's like bases loaded, the guy throw. It's like two and O count.
- [23:26]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [23:27]
Bill Simmons
And the announcer does the. There's nowhere to put him. And you're like, yeah, there really isn't. There's nowhere to put him.
- [23:32]
Cousin Sal
Right, right.
- [23:34]
Bill Simmons
And hockey, I guess the version of that is the 5 on 4, the 5 on 3 power play in OT. I still feel like I've been in the house for great games in every sport. I've never seen a game 7 of the world Series in person, but I still think in football when it's really, when it's like final two minutes and every play is moment just feels the most momentous and they're coming to the line and it's like third and eight and it's like if we get a stop here, we might actually win the Super Bowl. There's a different kind of energy with that.
- [24:06]
Cousin Sal
Oh yeah, you know, Neil o' Donnell was driving towards the end zone. I was in, in the Cowboys Steelers super bowl and I remember thinking I'm going to have a stroke. I'm like, you know, I'm, I'm 24 years old here and I'm just going to stroke out here in the upper deck and that's going to be it. So yeah, there are situations where it does look like they're actually coming for you.
- [24:24]
Bill Simmons
I think the single most exciting thing that can happen to a fan in sports is the come from behind home run.
- [24:31]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [24:34]
Bill Simmons
Dave HENDERSON in the 1986American League Championship Series, when we were down three, one of the Angels down three runs, the ninth inning, and then he hit a homer off of Donnie Moore to tie it. I just don't think that's the most excited I've ever been by anything that's happened. Like, just a single play, just where you. It's basically like you get a second. You get a second life, like in a video game. Like somebody just gives you a quarter and you get to keep playing. You're like, oh, my God. The most famous one when I was a kid was the Bernie Carbo home run in the Carlton Fisk game. I took it from 6:3 to 6:6. But the home run in the ninth by Rojas, the classic. Like, you just want him to get on base. You're not thinking he's going to go deep. And then it's like, oh, my God, that. Oh. And then it's just like, you black out, basically.
- [25:19]
Cousin Sal
And you know why it's great in baseball? Because unlike any sport, it. It's. There's no hiccup. It's not going to get called back for a holding. Right. It's not going to get right. As long as it doesn't wrap around the foul pole, you don't have to worry about anything. That's a home run. He's just got to touch the bases and you're good. You know, you have to worry about a penalty kick or offsides or anything. Bullshit.
- [25:38]
Bill Simmons
What's your greatest home run? What's your favorite one for. For the Mets. The one that made you black out.
- [25:44]
Cousin Sal
I think I have to say. Dyke against the Astros in that playoff series. Yeah, that was pretty awesome. But there were a few against you.
- [25:51]
Bill Simmons
Every fan base has one of them. Well, the Blue Jays, I. I feel bad for the fans, but 32 years, they. They were playing that up, and it's. I. I can't tell if that's long or maybe we're just old, because I totally remember when they won in 92 and 93. It's like, all right, they did go back to. Back in the 90s. Like, this isn't. This isn't the Cubs.
- [26:10]
Cousin Sal
Right? Yeah. I just think they especially want to give it to America here. That also helped in 2025, but, yeah, 30 years is nothing. Try being a Cowboys fan. We're on about that. Same thing.
- [26:26]
Bill Simmons
Well, it was almost the worst weekend in the history of Canada because the Bills almost blew the Chiefs game. I consider the Bills a Canadian team. I was thinking about Ariel Helwani, who comes on this pod a lot, who I'm friendly with, his three teams are the Knicks, the Bills, and the Blue Jays.
- [26:47]
Cousin Sal
Oh, wow.
- [26:48]
Bill Simmons
So, yeah, so just in 2025, we were texting about this earlier. He had the Bills loss in January. He had that fucking crazy Knicks Pacers series with that Halliburton game, which is the most improbable basketball loss, you know, maybe ever. Right. And then you have this Blue Jays going against. Going against the Dodgers, losing three horrible stomach punch losses in a row.
- [27:14]
Cousin Sal
That's a hundred seasons of no winning. Yeah, that's no good. Yeah.
- [27:18]
Bill Simmons
He's basically like, I might not have gone to work this week. Do you remember after the Aaron Boone game, I left Jimmy's show the next day?
- [27:26]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [27:26]
Bill Simmons
I left at like one o'.
- [27:27]
Cousin Sal
Clock.
- [27:29]
Bill Simmons
I honestly felt like physically ill. I couldn't. I was supposed to write jokes. I wanted to, like, put my head in an oven.
- [27:37]
Cousin Sal
We also were recording you clandestinely and you're like, fuck you. I'm gonna quit this job if you play that on tv.
- [27:43]
Bill Simmons
I did get mad.
- [27:44]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. You were very upset.
- [27:46]
Bill Simmons
We'll take a break for the pod. We'll keep going on the YouTubes. This episode is brought to you by Michelob Ultra, the official beer partner of the NBA. So the NBA season is starting. I'm excited about a bunch of different things. We have a lot of lot of teams up in the air. Boston, Milwaukee, Indiana. What are we getting from these teams? The Lakers, can they hang on and still be a top six team? I think I'm most excited for the Texas teams. I want to see Durant in Houston, Cooper Flagg in Dallas, and Wemby and Dylan Harper in San Antonio. I feel like I'm going to be spending a lot of time in the state of Texas with my basketball choices. There are a lot of moments worth playing for. The ones that taste best are served cold. Unlike in Texas, where it's usually hot. Whatever happens this season, catch every moment with Mick Lobotra, the official beer partner of the NBA, getting fans closer to the game with a chance to win courtside seats. You heard me correctly, a trip to All Star weekend, custom merch and much more. Michelob Ultra Superior is worth playing for. Enter now at michelobaltra.com courtside Michelob Ultra Courtside 2025-2026 no purchase necessary. OPA to US residents. 21/plus begins on October 1, 2025. Ends on June 30, 2026. Multiple entry periods. See official rules@michelobalcher.com courtside for free entry, entry deadlines, prizes and details. NFL, where do you want to start? You want to start Bills?
- [29:13]
Cousin Sal
Kc I mean I just start with me. The gambling gods just said, hey, enjoy your Yamamoto MVP winnings. We're going to take it away from you and then some. And if you. That's it. If your great uncle leaves you anything in his will, we're going to take that too. Effing Packers Lions. Just the worst.
- [29:30]
Bill Simmons
Well, we were worried. We did say the favorites had done really well the last couple weeks and we were a little worried about the parlays teaser train. There were a lot of obvious ones and the ones that were the big letdowns today were the packers and the Lions. I got to say I didn't have the packers on the multi view. Really?
- [29:47]
Cousin Sal
Oh not on the multi view.
- [29:49]
Bill Simmons
Wow. I didn't. I had six games going and they were one of the two that didn't crack it and I didn't put it on till the fourth quarter.
- [29:55]
Cousin Sal
Good for you.
- [29:56]
Bill Simmons
I kept waiting for the, for them to all of a sudden to be up 20 to 6 and it just never happened. And I, and obviously saw, I saw that awful 4th and 8 from the 13. I don't know. Would Jerry Jordan love just whipping it into the end zone?
- [30:10]
Cousin Sal
Was that the worst pass ever? Like was it the worst pass ever?
- [30:14]
Bill Simmons
Really bad. Yeah. They didn't. Never punted. How do you score 13 points and not punt?
- [30:19]
Cousin Sal
They didn't punt. They scored 13 points. The opposing quarterback at 102 yards passing and no touchdowns and an interception. And if I, if you would have told me that much I would have taken, taken a second mortgage out on the, on the family home here. But. And it, it didn't. But yeah that 4th and 8. Are we going to start with this game? Because I just like they, I, I think these coaches are getting a little ridiculous with not kicking like 4th and 8 from the 13 with 11 minutes left, you're down 7.
- [30:45]
Bill Simmons
We did it on the 4th and 17 and it actually worked which I didn't understand that one either.
- [30:49]
Cousin Sal
But a lot of minutes less. There weren't a lot like 11 you have to score in twice anyway. Like I don't know even Atlanta passing on the field goal in your game was weird but I know it worked. But yeah. I don't know man.
- [31:02]
Bill Simmons
I don't know.
- [31:02]
Cousin Sal
I don't know. I don't know why you go for it there so much.
- [31:05]
Bill Simmons
The Packers. I think the packers have had the biggest swerve over the last week because everyone's feeling awesome about them. After that Pittsburgh game, they lose to home at Carolinas, 13 point favorites, which I'm going to say will be the biggest favorite to lose a game this year. Like, usually we get over 10 points. That happens what, four or five, four times maybe all year. Thirteen and a half is like, that's like once every couple years.
- [31:31]
Cousin Sal
It's the biggest since 2023. Titans, Miami.
- [31:34]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, so I'm right.
- [31:35]
Cousin Sal
And tied their largest upset loss since 1970.
- [31:39]
Bill Simmons
I don't know. But the funny thing is they've done this in the lafleur era. They play three really shitty games each year and you don't know when they're going to happen. And this was obviously one of them. But then the other big thing is it seems like they lost Tucker Kraft for the year.
- [31:54]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, that looks bad.
- [31:55]
Bill Simmons
They hurt his knee and they were doing the thing like, it's not good. How's Tucker Kraft saying not good? They. When they do. When they open with the not good or it's like, hey, we'll see, you know, MRI tomorrow. Keep your fingers crossed. When they do the not good, that means it's bad.
- [32:09]
Cousin Sal
They think it's MCL and acl. So yeah, that's. That's bad for him. He's a fun player and well, yeah.
- [32:16]
Bill Simmons
I thought he was their best and most reliable third down guy. Most reliable red zone guy. So that changes their destiny. And then on the flip side, Carolina's in the playoff picture.
- [32:26]
Cousin Sal
Five and four.
- [32:27]
Bill Simmons
They're five and four. They played New Orleans and Atlanta the next two weeks. So we could have the Carolina could be seven and four in two weeks and the Bears could be seven and three. And those teams aren't good. Right, right. I mean, nobody thinks the Bears are good. Is anybody get offended by that?
- [32:47]
Cousin Sal
It's funny, when we went over who's going to be the seventh NFC team, we settled on the Niners and you put together that parlay and it was like, what +340. And then the Niners spanked the Giants. I'm like, oh, that's looking good. But I didn't realize. I'm like, oh, shit, the Panthers are in the picture here. Look. What. What is going. Is that really going to. Now the Bears are back in it.
- [33:05]
Bill Simmons
So let's go. Let's go to the big game, the Buffalo Kansas City game where Josh Allen beats Mahomes. He's five and one in the regular season against Mahomes, but Mahomes has won every playoff meeting. I was trying to think of like a real life Example of what this counts. Yeah, like there is no example. It's like you don't really get to brag about it, but it's also not nothing. And then you think about the four playoff wins they had. One of them was the 13 seconds game where Allen did everything you could possibly do to win the game.
- [33:41]
Cousin Sal
Is there a guy who wins a non title match all the time? And then the wrestling.
- [33:45]
Bill Simmons
Oh they good wrestling.
- [33:46]
Cousin Sal
Goes up against magnificent Morocco and he just pins him four minutes at the metal lands.
- [33:51]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, he's repeatedly winning the non title matches, not the actual pay per view matches. I do think watching that confirms something I've been saying all year is I just think Josh is slightly better than Mahomes for whatever reason right now. And I think the difference is the inside the five yard line stuff and the fourth and short stuff. I think Allen is just the best guy in the league. There's the push push in the nfc. I get it. But I just think Allen is getting into the end zone when you're inside the five. And Mahomes, they've never QB sneaked him since he got hurt that time and over and over again. You see you can actually do a goal line stand against them because you never have to worry about the QB sneak because they just won't do it. They're always trying to cheat around it or ram cream hunt in the middle or do these little quick outs. And I think it's easy to play a team when you know they're never going to QB sneak. The Raiders lost today because Lawrence ended up QB sneaking what two times in a row to get it finally.
- [34:46]
Cousin Sal
Well because they're the Raiders. But yes. Yeah, I think like they have to be extra creative down by the goal line. They don't have. You're right. They don't have the luxury of what like the Bills do. And some of these other even like the Falcons could ram it in or Seattle as we saw. But yeah they have to do like the shovel pass to Kelsey or something weird over the middle because they quick.
- [35:07]
Bill Simmons
The guy in motion who does the quick 45 degree angle Tyreek Hill play.
- [35:11]
Cousin Sal
Yep, yep. Yeah. Rashid Rice running it in. But yeah, I mean they. What was he held to under 50% passing like this Is this Bill's defense? I. I think we're at a good spot here with some of these defenses getting better. Right. Like we worried about the Bills defense who was the other terrible. Like even the Steelers defense stepped up. I didn't expect that to happen. The Ravens are.
- [35:32]
Bill Simmons
Why would you. They Were terrible last week. They gave them 20 straight passes.
- [35:35]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, but the Steelers, Bills, and Ravens might play defense now and could lead to, like, some fun AFC games.
- [35:42]
Bill Simmons
Well, you know, it's fun. K is the eight seed right now.
- [35:45]
Cousin Sal
Wow.
- [35:45]
Bill Simmons
Are they missing that because there's only seven playoff seeds in each conference?
- [35:49]
Cousin Sal
You don't think they'll change that? Goodell will change that. Change that to 8.
- [35:52]
Bill Simmons
It'd be interesting if they changed that in, like, week 12. Hey, we have an idea. 16 team playoff brackets. I'd be remiss if I didn't mention Sal.
- [36:01]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [36:02]
Bill Simmons
The Patriots, with Tom Brady as the starter, only started 5 and 4 twice in 2001 and 2002. 2001, he didn't even start the first three games. 2002, they finished 9 and 7, and then after that, never again. Brady had 13 Patriot seasons of four losses or less, and after 2002, never finished worse than 11 and 5. So everybody can take a big heaping sip of settle down juice in the goat discussion. Tom Brady is. We're still good. Yeah, we're still good. We're still fine.
- [36:39]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Oh, Brady's not the goat. No, he's not the goat. Oh, he is the goat. But we have to settle down. Okay.
- [36:45]
Bill Simmons
He's the goat. Settle down.
- [36:46]
Cousin Sal
I don't know what you're saying. Oh, I see.
- [36:48]
Bill Simmons
Settle down.
- [36:49]
Cousin Sal
Oh, I see what you're saying. Oh, he is the goat. I didn't know if you were. You were put. It's fine.
- [36:55]
Bill Simmons
Win a few more Super Bowls. Maybe don't start the season five and four and we can throw you in the goat.
- [37:00]
Cousin Sal
I see what you're saying. Maybe be Josh Allen comparing them to the current Patriots. I would totally misread that.
- [37:05]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. This one had a funny one, though. McDermott, they're up seven. There's, like, 30 seconds left. Chiefs have no timeouts. They're on, like, the 36 yard line, and he decides to try to kick a field goal to go up 10. Misses it. All of a sudden, the chief. You punt.
- [37:23]
Cousin Sal
You punt there.
- [37:24]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I punt. You're not going 90 yards in 20 seconds. It's not happening. Just punt it out of bounds.
- [37:29]
Cousin Sal
What was. It was 27 seconds left.
- [37:31]
Bill Simmons
Fourth and. Yeah, like, just pun it. Out of bounds.
- [37:33]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. What do you want to give them.
- [37:35]
Bill Simmons
The ball at the 40. Like that's doable and that I can get a pass interference. I can get Kelsey over the midd. I can down it. Like, it's conceivable. I can get score in three plays, right?
- [37:44]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Yeah, those just always go into the. Right into the end zone. But I guess it wouldn't matter from the 20 with the. Your own 20 with 20 seconds left.
- [37:51]
Bill Simmons
You're right.
- [37:52]
Cousin Sal
I mean, we've seen my homes do it, but that was probably. But the kick just missed. Then, thank God, because we had teasers all over the place with. Oh, my God.
- [37:59]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I had the Bills to win the game. And then at halftime, I did the Chiefs money line. The Chiefs were. Were winning by a point in the second half and they were doing a little chasing.
- [38:10]
Cousin Sal
Little Jamar chasing after that. Lions lost.
- [38:15]
Bill Simmons
You mentioned that thing about the punting, so I thought the same thing. They're not going to do it because these teams always kick it in the end zone. What the fuck do these punters do all day in practice every day, Right? Like, how many things are there to practice? It's like, all right, we're in a practice where you punt it as far as you can. And then I thought we'd practice. When you angle the punts and they don't go in the end zone, what are the other. I guess you're practicing a fake punt play every. What do punters do all day? They can't just direct a punt into the. I feel like when we were kids, punters could do this routinely. Now nobody. It's like how nobody can bunt anymore in baseball. Right?
- [38:56]
Cousin Sal
Well, bunting was taken out of. Yeah, right, Exactly. Yeah. But yes, the coffin corner, or at.
- [39:01]
Bill Simmons
Least kick it out at about corner.
- [39:03]
Cousin Sal
You're. What are you doing?
- [39:04]
Bill Simmons
You're.
- [39:04]
Cousin Sal
You're turning your body a little bit, right? And then aiming it not directly at the sideline, but 25 yards downfield and then down the sideline.
- [39:11]
Bill Simmons
So these guys, it's their only job. It's not like they're also doing five other things and bartending at night. And it's like this is a real job where they make multiple millions a year. They don't know how to do a coffin corner punt.
- [39:22]
Cousin Sal
Kills their net, though. Kills their net stats. And then when you go to renegotiate, it's not good. I think it's like the.
- [39:28]
Bill Simmons
The.
- [39:28]
Cousin Sal
But now it doesn't matter. Like the basketball player taking a 3 with 2 seconds left. Full court goes against the stats.
- [39:36]
Bill Simmons
Well, Casey's the eight seed. They're two behind Denver. And here's what they have left, Sal. 5 and 4, bye week. Next week at Denver. Like a real chance to be 5 and 5. Home for Indianapolis at Dallas, home. Houston, home. Chargers at Tennessee, home. Denver at Vegas So they played Denver twice and they already have four losses. And I think they're over under for the season was 12 and a half. I'm gonna say yeah.
- [40:03]
Cousin Sal
I'm not doing this though. They'll go under 12 and a half for sure because they can't.
- [40:07]
Bill Simmons
But what. What does that feel like to 11 and 6?
- [40:10]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [40:10]
Bill Simmons
They're still making the playoffs, but 10.
- [40:11]
Cousin Sal
I don't think Jackson even makes it. Right. Do they have odds here? Yeah. I gotta look here now. This is bad.
- [40:17]
Bill Simmons
Feels like there's two more losses in there.
- [40:19]
Cousin Sal
We can't. It's not gonna be against the Cowboys on Thanksgiving. But what do you think they are to make the playoffs?
- [40:27]
Bill Simmons
I would say minus 240.
- [40:29]
Cousin Sal
You see it's. It's minus 650. They're not going to let anybody steal money. Who's the seven seed? You said they were eighth.
- [40:38]
Bill Simmons
Well, Jacksonville's in there now. Just saying.
- [40:43]
Cousin Sal
I guess Jacksonville does have the head to head, right? Yeah.
- [40:46]
Bill Simmons
They're five and three. They've beaten KC Right. And they have rest of the way. They played the Titans twice. That could be seven wins. They play the jets, that's eight. They're at Cardinals. Next week they play the Texans. Probably lost, but yeah, there's a path for them to get to 10 next week.
- [41:11]
Cousin Sal
They might be against Davis Mills next week. I would say he's 50. 50 Stroud.
- [41:17]
Bill Simmons
Can we talk about that game?
- [41:18]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, let's do it.
- [41:19]
Bill Simmons
That was my worst loss of the day. I had the Texans. Stroud got concussed and then apparently Demiko Ryan's got concussed with about two minutes left because 114 boot and rally. Bo Nicks did it again. He got hammered for the first two hours of the game. He passed out. He threw up all over the American flag on the wall. Standing next to him and threw up. All had diarrhea. They threw him in a shower. They gave him a cup of coffee. And boot. And boot and rallied. Bo came back out for the next next hour. Two touchdown drives ties the game. And Houston gets the ball on their own 13 with a minute and 14 left. Tie game. Denver has two timeouts and I'm sitting there going, okay, handoff, handoff. Third handoff. You punt it back. They have 10 seconds left. Let's go to overtime. You have Davis Mills as your quarterback. You've scored three points since he came into the game. You're not going 60 yards against Denver's defense.
- [42:24]
Cousin Sal
Can I add one more wrinkle? His back is to the end Zone. The lighting in those Texas stadiums are so weird. And you get in the daylight right in his face and it's like fragmented daylight. And so he's got to look into the sun while throwing downfield. Take it from there. What are the three plays they do?
- [42:42]
Bill Simmons
Incomplete pass on first down to Christian Kirk. Just didn't even start the clock. It goes five seconds, stops Jaden Higgins, four yard pass. And Higgins for some reason goes out of bounds. So we really want you guys to have two timeouts. Third and six, incomplete pass, putting it back to you. 55 yard punt return for eight. And Denver has the ball with two timeouts. Thinking with a minute left they ran 14 seconds off the clock. And other than that, Brian Callahan, when he called. What was that thing when he called a timeout and they were going to kick the field goal and then it was a delay a game after they called the timeout. The delay a game after the timeout. That was the worst coaching moment of the year.
- [43:25]
Cousin Sal
They should probably.
- [43:26]
Bill Simmons
I think this is the new worst coaching moment of the year because Houston needed the game. Like they don't have a lot of room for error now. Um, and anyway Denver wins the game. And it was the first time where I was like, are we sure Demiko Ryan's is a good coach? Cause this was bad.
- [43:41]
Cousin Sal
You had Tex. I'd be pissed too if I had the Texans, but I stayed away. I just like this. Yeah, whoever gets. I thought Whoever got to 17 first wins. And that's kind of how it was. But 34 minutes to 25 minutes time of possession for Houston. Denver had one. One interception and one fumble. They had fewer total yards. Houston was just 3 for 17 on third down. And it was because they had Davis Mills. Like they obviously won the game with CJ Stroud I would think at this point. But just the same, roll the dice in overtime. What the hell are you thinking there?
- [44:14]
Bill Simmons
See your home Denver special teams was awful and Bo Nicks was awful for two solid hours. There was like near the end of the second I was going against him in our fantasy league. Near the end of the second quarter he was -1.85. That was his fantasy total. And in the fourth quarter I think he was at five points and then finally rallied. But that's it for the Texans. I mean I'm not ready to make them a cross offs team, but right now they are. Let's see, three and five. Yeah, they have the Titans only once. They still have a Bills game on on Thursday night. They still have at Colts at Chiefs At Chargers and the Colts again.
- [44:56]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [44:57]
Bill Simmons
I like to.
- [44:58]
Cousin Sal
It's not.
- [44:59]
Bill Simmons
It's a cross off in pencil. Right. Not in pen, but I think in pencil. They have. That team's not going seven and two down the streets.
- [45:09]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. I mean they're not grabbing a wild card. Right. So they have to steal that division somehow. Boy. And it's not looking good, especially if he doesn't start next week. But Denver is. Are they the fullest shit champs of the world? Like this team? I think they're decent sometimes. But they beat Cam Ward, they beat Jake Browning, they beat Justin Fields, they beat Jackson Dart, they beat Davis Mills. I mean, that is.
- [45:33]
Bill Simmons
There's something to be said for turning it on in fourth quarters and kind of rising to the occasion. But I also think it's the team like when we're doing over unders next August.
- [45:42]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [45:43]
Bill Simmons
They would jump out to us as the fullest shit team.
- [45:45]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [45:46]
Bill Simmons
Like, look at this. They went 12 and five, they were eight and one and you know, last two minute games.
- [45:52]
Cousin Sal
Well, we liked them this year because they were one in six in one score games last year and now win the division too much the other way.
- [46:01]
Bill Simmons
I was happy because I have a lot of Broncos over unders. I was upset because I thought Texans. I just think if Stroud doesn't get hurt, I think. I think this is a win. I don't know what happened. One thing I will say, they blew a couple deep passes. There's their vaunted secondary. Denver got behind them a couple times and that was the difference because they didn't really do anything else. And then the. Speaking of AFC south teams. Steelers, Colts. So the Steelers have six turnovers, which means against the Colts and the Patriots, the Steelers forced 11 turnovers. So if you want to talk about full of shit teams, maybe start there with the, with the short passes and just. Let's just get a turnover every 40 minutes against teams we're playing. I feel like it would make so much more sense if they played in New Orleans. And we're just like the voodoo, the official voodoo Steelers where we're like, oh, there's some actual voodoo shit going on.
- [46:58]
Cousin Sal
I will say that Rogers injures his hand before the game. The line doesn't move, but then it does move.
- [47:03]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, very weird. The Colts are up 7 nothing. Steelers are doing nothing. Steelers punt, punt, bounces, hits the Colts kick punt returner and rolls right to a Steeler. And that was it. You're like, oh, okay, here we go. Here. This is that. By the way, that happens Three times a year when the dumb kick returner just stand for some reason just is like, hey, there's the ball. It's right next to me and gets hit by it and renegade, it's over.
- [47:33]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, that was it. I don't. How much less do you think of Daniel Jones? I, I knew he was due for something like this, but. And the team was. I'm still okay with them. I still would be very surprised if they blew that division. So they're outdoors minus 2:40.
- [47:52]
Bill Simmons
They're playing the Voodoo Steelers. Jones looked like 20, 24 giants. Jones, I mean he was bad. It wasn't just the turnovers. He was actually like just bad the whole game. I, I like he missed. He. He had Pierce open on a deep one once that he's been hitting all year and overthrew it and he just was not the guy. From the first couple months I was rooting against them even though I had money on them by like 11, 15 for. Cause I started thinking about the Pats on the one seed. Like really started thinking about it.
- [48:23]
Cousin Sal
Look at you. Look at you.
- [48:24]
Bill Simmons
I got excited about it.
- [48:25]
Cousin Sal
What a great start.
- [48:25]
Bill Simmons
Thinking about Indy rest of the way. Atlanta bye week at KC home. Houston at Jacksonville, at Seattle, San Francisco, Jacksonville at Houston. So Houston twice and then at Casey at Seattle. So they're 7 and 2. 12 and 5 is conceivable. I don't think anything higher than that.
- [48:46]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, no, I think 13 and 4.
- [48:48]
Bill Simmons
12 and 5 somewhere in there.
- [48:49]
Cousin Sal
Maybe 11, maybe 11. But yeah, I don't. They can't blow it. Minus 240. I'm just trying to look at these other odds. I wouldn't take any other team to seal that division.
- [48:58]
Bill Simmons
I would not either. Well, and then we have. Well, we should talk about the Seahawks quickly because they just absolutely destroyed Washington. They're 6 and 2, could be 8 now. They were first in DVO heading into this game and this was the best game they put all year. Darnold's on a heater. You look at their schedule the rest of the way. Their toughest road game is at Chargers in two weeks. Alt's not going to probably be playing in that at San Francisco to end the season or at Atlanta. It's a pretty cream puffy schedule and I think there's a real case now for them to be the one seed. Do they have one seed odds for them yet?
- [49:37]
Cousin Sal
They're very solid. I mean they're not even favored to win the division. Yeah, they're plus 150.
- [49:43]
Bill Simmons
Plus 150 for division for the division.
- [49:45]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I don't think they have. I mean they have.
- [49:47]
Bill Simmons
They don't have the one seed bet. Yeah, they do.
- [49:49]
Cousin Sal
Oh, they do.
- [49:50]
Bill Simmons
They're plus 470 for the one seed.
- [49:53]
Cousin Sal
And they look great tonight.
- [49:54]
Bill Simmons
Rams are plus 380. I think they're better than the Rams. Personally. If on a neutral field, I would pick the Seahawks.
- [50:03]
Cousin Sal
I don't know. But is Washington a team like we should be? First of all, we should probably cry. I'm okay crossing them off. Especially with right when that's our next cross off. It's Mariota the rest of the year. They're not going to get much better. Right. They have an angry Lions team, Broncos, Eagles. In the next five weeks, they have to be a cross off.
- [50:21]
Bill Simmons
But I had two cross offs for you actually. Cause I think Arizona's a cross off now.
- [50:26]
Cousin Sal
Oh, you don't even want to see them beat the Cowboys by three touchdowns.
- [50:29]
Bill Simmons
No, because I think, I think the. The NFC west moving away from them like it has. I don't see a scenario where, oh yeah, they climb back. We basically have to have. They'd have to flip places with one of the three teams and I don't see it.
- [50:42]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [50:43]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, they have to make up three wins. Cause that we're going to have at least two from the NFC North. So I have for cross offs, Jets, Browns, Tennessee, Miami, New Orleans, Vegas, Cleveland, the Giants, Arizona and Washington.
- [50:58]
Cousin Sal
Washington.
- [50:59]
Bill Simmons
That's 10.
- [50:59]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [51:00]
Bill Simmons
Let's do it.
- [51:00]
Cousin Sal
We're almost there.
- [51:01]
Bill Simmons
That's fair, right? We're heading into week 10. We have 10 cross off season.
- [51:04]
Cousin Sal
So it's 22 teams and how many.
- [51:06]
Bill Simmons
Teams for 16 spots?
- [51:07]
Cousin Sal
26 spots.
- [51:08]
Bill Simmons
14 spots.
- [51:09]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, 14 spots. Yeah. They look, they look so damn good. Seattle. And the only good part of the game, really interesting was Collinsworth. Well, I. He was like, Darnold. You said he was on the heater. It was like 16 for 16, 17 for whatever he was. And Collinsworth circles the defensive line for Washington and he's like, do you know how hard it is to have these monsters chasing you? He said, mon, monsters. Monsters. It's like it's a pass, pass rush variation. But I'm like, all right, that's just. That's a speech thing.
- [51:40]
Bill Simmons
Monsters.
- [51:41]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, they're so damn good.
- [51:44]
Bill Simmons
Darnold. That turned out to be the move of the year. We thought it was going to be a wash. And it was going to be an interesting argument over the course of the year. Darnold versus Gino. And we were like, oh, we'll be changing our minds on this one nine times.
- [51:57]
Cousin Sal
It's like, nope, I was talking about with someone else. And Darnold and Baker make so many teams look bad for passing on them in free agency. Right? And just not. Or not sticking with them. But imagine if those guys didn't pan out. We'd have two more teams with terrible quarterbacks. This league would suck so bad. Jesus.
- [52:17]
Bill Simmons
I had Seattle to win the division and Denver to win the division before the year in the past to be a playoff team. Those are my three best ones. And Miami to stink. I guess those are my four best ones. Yeah, I've had some bad ones though. I had Vegas to make the playoffs. Not feeling great about that because they're really, really awful. We were both under on Washington and.
- [52:41]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, at Arizona to win the division, that was my worst thing. But there's more to come. Don't worry, people.
- [52:46]
Bill Simmons
We'll take a break. And then you want to apologize. This episode is brought to you by Apple. Before we had the Bill Simmons podcast, we had the BS Report and it was just an idea. It began with a mic and my Mac and the conviction to take a chance on myself. It was like, whoa, I can just record conversations with my friends and send them out into the world and we'll just get it going. And then when I was on my own in 2015, same thing. Tried to figure out, could I record this in the back of my house? How many producers do I need? Do I just need one? How do I get this out? What happens to it? Do I send it out? Is it a file? Is it an RSS feed? You just kind of figure it out as you go along and you watch it grow and it's pretty great. I mean, I think like over 10 years ago, October 1, 2015, was the first episode of the Bill Simmons Podcast. And since then we have the ringer. We have all these podcasts, all these people. And it all started with an idea. Once upon a time, no matter what you have an idea for, whether it's creating your own best selling book, pursuing your passions and turning them into a media network, or making that next box office record breaking sports film, go for it. You just need to get started. Your great ideas start on Mac. Find out more on apple.com Mac this episode is brought to you by Prime Video. Thursday Night Football is on and it's only on prime this week. An old school rivalry as the Las Vegas Raiders collide with the Denver Broncos. Every game a must win for the Raiders at this point to stay in the playoff race. The Broncos looking to be maybe the AFC West Division champ. Maybe a one seed, maybe a two seed. Coverage begins at 7pm Eastern with Football's Best Party TNF Tonight presented by Verizon. Not a Prime member. Not a problem. Simply sign up for a 30 day free trial. It's the Raiders and Broncos Thursday, 7pm Eastern, only on Prime Video. Restrictions apply. See Amazon.com amazonprime for details. This episode is brought to you by LinkedIn Ads. The best B2B marketing gets wasted on the wrong people. So when you wanna reach the right professionals, use LinkedIn ads. LinkedIn has grown to a network of over 1 billion professionals, including 130 million decision makers. And that's where it stands apart from the other ad buys. You could target your buyers by job title, industry, company role, seniority, skills, company revenue, so you can stop wasting budget on the wrong audience. That's why LinkedIn Ads generates the highest B2B return and ad spend on all online ad networks. Seriously, all of them. Spend $250 on your first campaign on LinkedIn ads and get a free $250 credit for the next one. Just go to LinkedIn.com SimmonsBill Terms and Conditions apply.
- [55:25]
Cousin Sal
Listen, people.
- [55:26]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, all right. Staying here on YouTube. All right. You wanted to apologize. We, we had, we. We wished some luck from Baby Doll Dixon a couple weeks ago. Today. You're just. You just have some apologies to end up.
- [55:37]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I just feel like a lot of people said f you. You guys, you're talking too much shit for a week, a month, two months, whatever. I mean, I think J.J. mcCarthy's at the top of that list we're talking about. Is he even injured? Well, is he coming back? You know what? Doesn't matter.
- [55:50]
Bill Simmons
Hiding an ankle sprain.
- [55:52]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Wentz with a broken torso is better. And I am going to. I think these are temporary apologies. Right. I feel like we could take them back. Right? Like, you gotta. Yeah. You still have to pass the road test, but pretty damn good. Like, if Caleb Williams had blown that game, I was gonna say, you know what? J.J. mcCarthy's the best quarterback in the NFC North. I take it all back. So I apologize. J.J. mcCarthy.
- [56:14]
Bill Simmons
I was. I thought he was all over the place in that game. He was streaky in this. Like, basically streaky the way some guys are in a season over the course of four quarters. There was a couple stretches where he looked awesome and there were a couple other stretches where he looked like a rookie QB playing his third start. Basically like some ran out of bounds stupidly in one play. But for the most part, I thought he was. He was really solid. Like, that was a great win. Combined with the fact that Flores and his defense finally figured out Goff how to, like, bug him. And Goff's one of those where, you know, 40 minutes in, if you have him in a teaser parlay, if the defense is hitting him a certain way and he starts fucking bounce, passing those passes over the middle, you're like, oh, my God, here we go.
- [57:02]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Flores dialed up a nice plan for Goff. I think Both teams had five sacks, but the Vikings five sacks were definitely more effective. Like, the Lions couldn't muster more than 65 yards rushing, I don't think. And that just. That just screwed Goff up. I know it ended up being a close game, but probably wasn't even.
- [57:19]
Bill Simmons
It was weird because they. They came out. Good drive. Laporta La porta la porta. Touchdown. It was like, oh, here we go.
- [57:26]
Cousin Sal
Yep.
- [57:26]
Bill Simmons
Lions don't. I can't wait to cross this one off. They only ran for 65 yards. They were 5 for 17 on third down. And yet again, had another game where multiple guys, you know, either limped off the field or were helped off the field. And they're five and three. It was a team. I really battled on whether I wanted to put them in the playoffs or not. And I finally kind of begrudgingly got there. I had them at, like, 10 and 7 as a wild card, but this has been kind of the Uneven lion season I think all of us were worried about. Right.
- [57:59]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, but I wouldn't.
- [58:01]
Bill Simmons
A lot of injuries, obviously.
- [58:02]
Cousin Sal
I also don't think I'd be betting against them much. You know, there'll be a couple spots, I think that where they're on the road, and this week's not one of them. But I still think top to bottom, I was surprised Campbell just didn't have them ready. He had, like, scored 88 points off of Buys his last two years. So I thought, like. Like you said, they did come out scoring, but, yeah, Flores was the MVP of that game.
- [58:24]
Bill Simmons
That was a flash sale line. We talked about it last week.
- [58:26]
Cousin Sal
It was.
- [58:27]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, the line was. It felt like two and a half, three points higher than it should be. And they were dying for anybody to take the Vikings. And we were all like, no, we're actually going to parlay the Lions and put them in teases. And we got screwed. What's your next apology?
- [58:42]
Cousin Sal
I'm going to say Colston Loveland, tight end for the Bears. We were all like, Tyler, Warren, Tyler, Warren, Tyler Warren. The Bears are nuts for passing on Tyler. Warren Colston. Loveland State. Saves the game, saves a pick like that. That was like one of the I'm going to quit gambling picks. The Bears.
- [59:00]
Bill Simmons
Can we go over that?
- [59:01]
Cousin Sal
I just, you know, I actually took.
- [59:04]
Bill Simmons
It off the TV because they. They did a pick six, and they were up 48 to 27. 48 to 27 with three minutes left, not realizing that they reviewed the pick six. I still don't understand how. It wasn't a pick six.
- [59:19]
Cousin Sal
It's like the guy who. The intended receiver breathed on him or something. I don't know what. What touched the. The intercept. Ridiculous. But they called him down.
- [59:28]
Bill Simmons
We do this. We do this a lot with football, where we're like, we watch football every day, and the rules seem to just change depending on the situation. That's one where it's like, I watch football every week. He gathered the ball as when he finally caught it, and he got up and ran. And they always call that a touchdown. And why are they bringing this back? So anyway, they have to punt. All of a sudden, Flaco scores. I didn't even know about it till Hench texted us.
- [59:51]
Cousin Sal
Hench's text. Like, Flacco has 400. Yeah. I'm like, yeah, who gives a shit? So what? Yeah, they're gonna lose.
- [59:55]
Bill Simmons
They're down six with the ball, driving, and it would have been one of the worst losses of all time. Then it seemed like the Bears were going to win by two and not cover. And then Loveland saves everybody.
- [60:06]
Cousin Sal
Amazing. And there's a still of Loveland, like, twisting in the air with three defenders around him. The caption is, he scored on this. Like he just bulldozed it. Probably should have gone down at the two like Gunner Stockton did for Georgia Saturday. And then they just kicked the field goal, Right? But thank God he didn't.
- [60:23]
Bill Simmons
But by the way, I'm not going to.
- [60:24]
Cousin Sal
You know, Ben Johnson says, don't. And you love those, right? The press.
- [60:29]
Bill Simmons
Ben Johnson's my favorite. I seek them out now. I'm like. I'm like, did he do a post game?
- [60:35]
Cousin Sal
You're going to pay him to come to your house?
- [60:37]
Bill Simmons
I love it. Yeah. He's like, this is what we do. It's like, this is what you do. You blew a 41:27 lead with two minutes left.
- [60:44]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. No, don't apologize for a win. He tells them like, all right, maybe apologize for allowing 15 points in 49 seconds.
- [60:52]
Bill Simmons
Apologize. Giving up 480 passing yards to a guy whose shoulder was so bad. He threw a 40 yard Hail Mary.
- [60:58]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [60:59]
Bill Simmons
It's a slight apology.
- [61:00]
Cousin Sal
I love his things, but as a gambler, I don't want to get. I feel like I was taking chill. Everyone's like, oh, you got so lucky with that Bears game. Like, it shouldn't have been close.
- [61:09]
Bill Simmons
Like, this is now that's a win that was. We should have won that by three touchdowns.
- [61:13]
Cousin Sal
It's like saying a guy born without any limbs wins a trip to Puerto Vallarta. On the prices rise. Like, oh, you're so lucky. Like, no, that's so much bullshit going on before the kickoff. Return for a touchdown, the block, field goal, the onside kick recovery. 15 points in less than a minute. The interception, like you said, for a touchdown. I was called back. All that wasn't very lucky. So eat it. I'm taking that win.
- [61:36]
Bill Simmons
Swift's replacement was awesome. I have him in our ringer fantasy league.
- [61:40]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, where'd you.
- [61:40]
Bill Simmons
That guy? If you didn't watch football year or you were in a coma or you were like in outer space and just landed and watched these games as your first games of the year, you would think that he was like Jonathan Taylor. Like, he was fucking incredible. He was over and over again just doing shit.
- [61:55]
Cousin Sal
And that's why I, that's why I turned it off. I'm like, he's just gonna. He's running for seven yards a clip and they just need to kill the clock.
- [62:00]
Bill Simmons
And then Ben Johnson gave him a game bar.
- [62:03]
Cousin Sal
Oh, he did?
- [62:03]
Bill Simmons
Okay, good. Yo, man, I love everybody in this room, man. It's a great win. We gotta keep it going. They all say the same things. It's unbelievable.
- [62:12]
Cousin Sal
That's good.
- [62:13]
Bill Simmons
Nobody's ever like, Nobody ever gets it. It's like, I knew I was better than DeAndre Swift. I've been telling all you motherfuckers all year, this is my team.
- [62:23]
Cousin Sal
Well, the other locker room there was different. Like Jamar Chase and Chase Brown going off on the defense. I kind of. I kind of like it. I kind of like it. I really do.
- [62:33]
Bill Simmons
It's in the running for the worst defense I've ever seen.
- [62:36]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. It's now many, many games.
- [62:39]
Bill Simmons
Ripping off 10, 10 yard plays over and over again. I had Caleb in Fantasy who had 40.5 points in our league that we care about.
- [62:47]
Cousin Sal
That's nice.
- [62:49]
Bill Simmons
Monagal had 198 total yards. The Bears ran for 283. Flacco at 470 for four tees. I think that, I think the Bengals are the most entertaining team in the League now, like if they can play another shitty team, it's going to be a 40 37.
- [63:05]
Cousin Sal
Should they play the Cowboys leading up to the super bowl like the morning of the Super Bowl Saturday game or the morning of. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- [63:13]
Bill Simmons
Make it like $100 million game. Get Netflix to do it. Yeah. Oh, more apologies. Who do you have next?
- [63:20]
Cousin Sal
Let's see, who else do I have? Oh, did he. I mean, he's going to be out of jail soon. That's great. How did he do it? We'll never down him again. What a. What a legend. Oh, you know what, this is dumb of me. I'm going to apologize to YouTube TV. I don't know why I didn't know you could customize the four box. Why didn't I? I'm sitting there like a forensic scientist in a lab trying to match up screens.
- [63:43]
Bill Simmons
You didn't know you could just press the thing? Oh my God. That's all I do.
- [63:47]
Cousin Sal
This is great. This is unbelievable. This is a game changer and I apologize for anything I've said to YouTube TV.
- [63:52]
Bill Simmons
I've gotten to the point where I like for good luck putting the pats on the bottom left.
- [63:56]
Cousin Sal
Oh really?
- [63:57]
Bill Simmons
So I'll just, I'll keep moving the multi views like trying to do it until I finally get the pats on the bottom left and then that's I'm an idiot.
- [64:04]
Cousin Sal
Bad job by me. I don't know why I did that. And I'll apologize.
- [64:08]
Bill Simmons
I have an apology. Can I do an apology?
- [64:10]
Cousin Sal
Go ahead.
- [64:10]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. I'd like to apologize to Mike Tomlin. Two weeks in a row betting against him at home in Pittsburgh as an underdog. I should have known. I should have known he was going to do all the dumb Steeler shit that they do all the time. I should have known it was. It looked too easy. Daniel Jones on grass. This was like the exact type of situation Tomlin loves. They're just going to get six turnovers out of nowhere. I just should have known he's. He's just, this is who he is. He's going to be this guy until he's like 70, just winning game. They're always going to go 9 and 8 or 10 and 7. I don't know why I went under with them. It doesn't matter who's on the team. They could have a 42 year old QB. They could have a defense that gives up 20 straight passes the week before. They're always going to be fine. There was going to go 9 and 8 or 10 and 7 well, 9.
- [65:01]
Cousin Sal
And 8 was still under, wasn't it? Wasn't it 9 and a half?
- [65:04]
Bill Simmons
They were 8 and a half this year.
- [65:05]
Cousin Sal
Oh, right. That's right. If you wanted to go over.
- [65:07]
Bill Simmons
All right, what's your last opposite?
- [65:09]
Cousin Sal
One more. I just have nerd clusters. They're fantastic. I laughed at them. I'm like, you kids are wasting your time with these nerd clusters. They're all of a sudden. Have you had them? They're my favorite non chocolate candy now. They've grown on me. They literally.
- [65:23]
Bill Simmons
Is that what Brad threw on our. On our ribs?
- [65:25]
Cousin Sal
He just did. Regular nerds. But they have these clusters now. It's like in a gummy. You haven't had this. You're not living right. You're just.
- [65:32]
Bill Simmons
You're just.
- [65:33]
Cousin Sal
Vanilla health days. Yeah, of course it's unhealthy. Look at me.
- [65:36]
Bill Simmons
Okay. Lately. Banana Kit Kat run.
- [65:40]
Cousin Sal
Oh, that's your thing.
- [65:40]
Bill Simmons
Kit Kats are really good. Well, my wife bought Halloween candy and bought the bigger Kit Kats.
- [65:46]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Can I tell you something? I think bigger Kit Kats are so much better than the smaller ones. And I think it has to.
- [65:53]
Bill Simmons
So much better. I think they make them differently.
- [65:56]
Cousin Sal
They must. I think the ratio of whatever is.
- [65:58]
Bill Simmons
There's more chocolate in the bigger ones.
- [66:00]
Cousin Sal
On the big ones. Yeah.
- [66:01]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I'm with you. Okay.
- [66:02]
Cousin Sal
Good.
- [66:03]
Bill Simmons
Pats, Falcons. Pats win. Don't cover. All the Pats fans are worried about this game. And yet the pats were up 217 driving before halftime at the. At midfield. There was like 25 seconds left. It felt like 24 and 24 to 7 minimum. And then May get sacked, fumbled. Falcons come back down, didn't even get sacked.
- [66:27]
Cousin Sal
It was such a wuss play.
- [66:29]
Bill Simmons
Just gave the ball almost like a.
- [66:31]
Cousin Sal
It's wrong with that guy. He's not that good, but go ahead.
- [66:33]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, he's on pace for 4,400 yards and 34 TDs and eight picks and breaking the completion record. Completion. Completion percentage record. He actually would have the record all time in the history of the NFL right now.
- [66:48]
Cousin Sal
I just can't believe this. I can't. I really can't believe we're doing this. Like years later. Like you. You should have had to suffer like a Cleveland Brown.
- [66:55]
Bill Simmons
I did suffer. We suffered for half a decade. What do you want?
- [66:57]
Cousin Sal
Please, please. Half a decade. And then you should have been able. You should have stayed with Mac Jones. Like you shouldn't go half a decade and now have, you know, junior goat here. This is so stupid.
- [67:09]
Bill Simmons
Well, he got sacked. 12 times in two weeks.
- [67:12]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [67:12]
Bill Simmons
And was under real duress. And there's some issues with this Pats team, which we've known, but they are seven and two. They are going to, I think, be a playoff team just because of their schedule. And they do have their trade deadline coming up with like $48 million under the cap. They need a pass rusher. They need another receiver. The game flipped today, not because that fumble, but because Booty got hurt. And all of a sudden the Pats had nobody getting open. Diggs is still like on a snap count. So it's like Pop Douglas. It's Kyle Williams, the rookie receiver who every time May throws to him. Either Williams gets crossed up with May or vice versa. He's never in the right spot and basically they're just throwing the tight ends and throwing swing passes. I thought they were really lucky to win the game. Drake London was killing them. It was the worst Gonzalez has looked all season.
- [67:59]
Cousin Sal
He is so dominant.
- [68:00]
Bill Simmons
Jake London was dominant.
- [68:01]
Cousin Sal
Very tough to cover, that guy.
- [68:03]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, they shut down Bijan.
- [68:06]
Cousin Sal
I didn't.
- [68:06]
Bill Simmons
Appendix was really up and down, but it came down and they missed an extra point.
- [68:11]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, it's. You get to play all the bad teams with all the bad coaches, all the bad quarterbacks and all the bad kickers. So it's hard to lose. And you're going to have A.J. brown against Tampa next week.
- [68:22]
Bill Simmons
I don't think it'll be A.J. brown, but I am looking at those Dolphins guys. That Jalen Phillips Hendrickson would be great. The Bengals lost again. I don't think the Raiders will trade Max Crosby.
- [68:33]
Cousin Sal
Nah. But look at you. The rich get richer here with this team. Do you think Vrabel 2 to 1 for coach of the Year is a better bet than maybe for mvp because he's sneaking up there. It's Steichen.
- [68:47]
Bill Simmons
It's either Vapor or Stichen. Right?
- [68:49]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. So that's. That's who you'd have to be down.
- [68:51]
Bill Simmons
To who has a better record. That's who wins Coach of the Year.
- [68:54]
Cousin Sal
I think if you win the division and you know our. Well, I don't know. This is some schedule and variable at plus 7:50. You do. That's good.
- [69:06]
Bill Simmons
From before the year. I picked that in our futures draft too.
- [69:09]
Cousin Sal
Oh, no. So one more thing. I'm going to lose. Terrific.
- [69:14]
Bill Simmons
You had some good ones in the future.
- [69:15]
Cousin Sal
I forgot who I had.
- [69:16]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Had one stupid ones. You know, I think the Pats are missing a couple. I think they have a real chance to do something in January and Maybe win a playoff game or two. But they're. The offensive line is becoming real concerning Will Campbell got worked a couple times. He got just shoved backwards into May a couple times which I have not. I don't remember seeing that before. They never mindre today either. Quickly, do we care about 49ers giants day ball being first coach fired? Probably not.
- [69:48]
Cousin Sal
No.
- [69:48]
Bill Simmons
Niners are six and three.
- [69:50]
Cousin Sal
We just need to be smarter about some stuff. Like we, we. We need to start respecting our cross off teams and treating them as cross off teams. And when you could bet against them getting two and a half points, just go for it. Especially since San Francisco was one of our playoff teams. Like how do we think this is all going to work out if we're not?
- [70:06]
Bill Simmons
How do you bet the Niners when you don't even know who's playing for them?
- [70:09]
Cousin Sal
I know, I know. But the Giants had worse injuries, it turns out. Although now San Francisco lost someone else too, so. But yeah, they heard us loud and clear about being the seventh seed and they just demolished that team.
- [70:22]
Bill Simmons
Jags, Raiders. Jags win. Don't cover. They win an ot. They win because they score in overtime. Another weird overtime thing. They take like seven minutes.
- [70:33]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [70:34]
Bill Simmons
Even though they basically took the kickoff almost to midfield, then they were just doing 40 seconds of play. They go down in the red zone. Nothing has been more exciting this year than watching the Jaguars execute plays inside the 10 yard line. They had a pick in the end zone in the first half. They actually scored. Raiders come back down, they score, but they don't get the two point because instead of throwing a Brock Bowers, who had 12 catches, 127 yards and three TDs and was running amok. They're like, no, no. We're gonna have Geno try to hit Tyler Lockett over the defensive line. There's no way this will get tipped.
- [71:07]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [71:08]
Bill Simmons
And they lose.
- [71:09]
Cousin Sal
We knew we were on a text chain like this is 30, 29 as the Raiders got the ball.
- [71:14]
Bill Simmons
No question they're going to overthink it.
- [71:15]
Cousin Sal
You said it was weird overtime. I thought that was the perfect. That that is exactly how it should be. One team gets it goes six or seven minutes, scores. The other team has a shot, has three or four minutes, scores and goes.
- [71:27]
Bill Simmons
I would go 12 minutes.
- [71:28]
Cousin Sal
I love that. I know. I just think they've worked out one possession each. That said, I thought this game should not have been in the late window. It should have been in a cricket stadium in Prague at 3:00am Pacific Time.
- [71:43]
Bill Simmons
I have three questions coming in this game. Would you like a rule addendum that if you score the first TD in overtime, the first team to have the ball, they score a touchdown. If they go for two and get it, the game's over. Ooh.
- [71:58]
Cousin Sal
No. I still want both teams touching the ball.
- [72:01]
Bill Simmons
It's not fair.
- [72:01]
Cousin Sal
The defenses are exhausted. It's not fair. One team wins a coin toss and the other team doesn't get it. But I get what you're saying. Yeah. Whatever avoids a tie is best.
- [72:12]
Bill Simmons
Here's my next question. Is Pete Carroll the new Clapper or is he the new Joe Biden? Because it's one or the other. Because he's on the sideline. He's not really. Doesn't seem like he's doing that much coaching. His mouth's kind of open and he's doing this like he is chewing gum or he's just kind of has that vacant look.
- [72:33]
Cousin Sal
Shoes come hard.
- [72:34]
Bill Simmons
It's a lot of clapping. A lot of clapping. I feel Clapper 2.0.
- [72:37]
Cousin Sal
I mean, he's sitting there watching 68 yard field goals, and he must be like, what the fuck? This is not. This is not my day and age. My. My game here. I mean, if we weren't going to.
- [72:46]
Bill Simmons
It does speak to how. How well liked Pete Carroll was and how disliked Bill Belichick is that they're basically in the same situation in college and pros and cons.
- [72:53]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Well, if he had 24, I think it might be a little different story. But they covered. I'm proud of them. Did you. And I'll say this. Bowers makes them watchable. Like, has a tight end. But has a tight end ever made an unwatchable team?
- [73:09]
Bill Simmons
Watchable?
- [73:09]
Cousin Sal
Just a tight end. I don't remember.
- [73:12]
Bill Simmons
I have him in all my fantasy leagues. He was awesome. Against the Pats, he got hurt. They played him hurt for like, three weeks, then stopped playing them.
- [73:18]
Cousin Sal
Right?
- [73:19]
Bill Simmons
And now he's, like, great again. Like, it was like that touch. Whatever injury he has, he's fine. He was like an absolute beast, right? And they were throwing it to him, throwing it to him, throwing it to him to the point where, like, hey, man, don't get this guy hurt again. Like, 12 catches is enough. Like, how many. What is he gonna have? 17?
- [73:36]
Cousin Sal
Was Russ Francis your guy? Like, with the. But. But I love the Patriots, but the Patriots were bad. But you watch because of Russ Francis. Like, I'm trying to figure out.
- [73:45]
Bill Simmons
We were good. We. We were good in 76 all the way through. We were famous to win the AFC every year. Basically. Really? Yeah. We had Russ Francis. We had Stanley Morgan and Daryl Stingley and Harold Jackson.
- [73:59]
Cousin Sal
Raiders and the Steelers. What are you talking about?
- [74:01]
Bill Simmons
It was a year where we were favored to win the AFC.
- [74:03]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. 2009.
- [74:04]
Bill Simmons
No, 1978 maybe. Really? One of those years. Yeah, we were like.
- [74:09]
Cousin Sal
Like when Denver won, we almost made.
- [74:11]
Bill Simmons
The Super bowl in 76. We got robbed by the. In the Raiders game.
- [74:14]
Cousin Sal
We were good. All right. I'm trying to think of another tight end that made a team great that wasn't not great, but watchable. I'll come up with it. Kellen Winslow, that team was good though. Gonzalez, good team.
- [74:31]
Bill Simmons
Ben Coates. Maybe one more thing from that game. 68 yard field goal. We've talked about this before. Not even a blip. I don't even think we made SportsCenter that somebody broke the record by 2 yards. So I think 75 yards has to be the number that people would actually be impressed by at this point.
- [74:52]
Cousin Sal
Interesting.
- [74:52]
Bill Simmons
68. It's bouncing off people. 70. I don't even think people would care. 75. They're like, oh, wow, that's long.
- [74:59]
Cousin Sal
75. Yeah. I want this to go up the record one per year for the rest of my life.
- [75:05]
Bill Simmons
And I want it 101 yards.
- [75:07]
Cousin Sal
101. I'm not going another 33 years. No, but if it got. If I got another 15 nerd clusters. 84 yard field goal is what I want to see. Yeah, but you're right. Like, there were only three games played in that late window. The Guy kicked a 68 yard field goal and I was like, all right, well, if we get to it, we get to it.
- [75:25]
Bill Simmons
There should never be less than four games in the late window.
- [75:28]
Cousin Sal
Right? Amen.
- [75:30]
Bill Simmons
They should have moved the Houston game.
- [75:32]
Cousin Sal
I thought the Colts, Steelers would move, but they wanted so much too many. They wanted all the eyes. The CBS eyes on Buffalo, kc, Ram, Saints.
- [75:42]
Bill Simmons
Nothing to report here except Stafford is the MVP candidate of the week. That'll be a story tomorrow. Stafford, why isn't he the mvp? Last year is Jonathan Taylor. This week will be Stafford plus 500.
- [75:53]
Cousin Sal
It's moving up.
- [75:54]
Bill Simmons
Chargers, Titans, Herbert. Eight picks this year and a couple really bad ones. It's like year five for him.
- [76:03]
Cousin Sal
He just doesn't care. I don't think he is just slinging it.
- [76:06]
Bill Simmons
It's.
- [76:06]
Cousin Sal
It's Brett Slinger. I think I. I gotta be honest. I didn't have this on. This is the one that kicked until. Until it got close to the spread at the end.
- [76:15]
Bill Simmons
I had this on instead of the Packer game. Chargers to be a sneaky fall out of the playoffs team. Right now they're 6 and 3. There's 3, 7 and 2 teams. Chargers are 6 and 3, Buffalo is 6 and 2. Chargers rest of the way, Pittsburgh at home. They're road games at Jacksonville, at Casey, at Dallas, at Denver. And they also have Philly and Houston in la. And if their offensive line is going to look like it did in the second half of the game and how it's looked without Joe Walt, I think this is a team that could drop out.
- [76:50]
Cousin Sal
You don't think that.
- [76:50]
Bill Simmons
I think that go from 6 and 3 to 9 and 8 seems conceivable.
- [76:54]
Cousin Sal
Really. All right, so let's see.
- [76:55]
Bill Simmons
Oh wow. Three more wins here.
- [76:57]
Cousin Sal
FanDuel agrees with you. Minus 225. So the right. The right there.
- [77:03]
Bill Simmons
They 10 wins, we think.
- [77:06]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [77:07]
Bill Simmons
That has to be AFC, that hat. You can't get in with nine. I don't think. I think it has to be 10.
- [77:11]
Cousin Sal
No, I don't think nine.
- [77:13]
Bill Simmons
So I think four wins is going to be hard for them.
- [77:20]
Cousin Sal
They're done with the Raiders.
- [77:21]
Bill Simmons
Casey. Casey's going to need the game.
- [77:23]
Cousin Sal
Definitely.
- [77:24]
Bill Simmons
When they play Denver in week week 18, that might be Denver playing for like the 1 seed. Like they're going to give a shit about that Philly. So it'll come down to Pittsburgh. If they lose to Pittsburgh next week, I think they.
- [77:38]
Cousin Sal
So that's. We're going to go over this in a second, but it's Sunday night and it's going to be 80% Steelers fans.
- [77:44]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. All right, one more break for the pod. This episode is brought to you by Viori, whose lounge collection is a total game changer. For fall comfort, take their Ponto performance joggers and Coronado hoodie made with Viori's signature dream knit fabric. Super soft, lightweight move with you wherever the day takes you. Plus, they're designed to look great, whether you're working out, running errands or even heading to the office or like me, power walking around la. Basically, Viori is an investment in your happiness. For our listeners, they're offering 20% off your first purchase at Vuori.com Simmons V-U-O-R-I.com Simmons exclusions apply. Visit the website for full terms and conditions. This episode is brought to you by Fox 1. Fox 1 is now live. You can stream all your Fox favorites together in one place. From the MLB post season to NFL on Fox to big noon Saturday starring Rob Stone with Fox one. You get it all live start Your seven day free trial today. Offers are subject to change. Go to Fox One for complete terms and conditions. Fox One streaming now. Going on YouTube guest alliance week 10 I'm up six three.
- [78:53]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, you're up six three by weeks.
- [78:57]
Bill Simmons
Cincinnati then he need time to figure out a defensive plan if they're ever going to trade Trey Hendrickson. This is the week, right? He doesn't have a long term contract. Team's going nowhere. How are you going to pay him when you already paid your receivers and burrow. Why not try to get like a second or a third firm?
- [79:16]
Cousin Sal
No doubt. Or maybe he'll just drive off a cliff. Take the easy way out. Poor guy.
- [79:21]
Bill Simmons
Cincy, Tennessee Casey and your team Dallas.
- [79:25]
Cousin Sal
You get a week off.
- [79:25]
Bill Simmons
Not watching them.
- [79:26]
Cousin Sal
So excited.
- [79:28]
Bill Simmons
Thursday night Broncos home for the Las Vegas Raiders. The Broncos are almost definitely going to be eight and two on Thursday night. I Broncos by nine.
- [79:44]
Cousin Sal
I had ten and a half and it's nine and a half. Oh, you get that shit. I got excited for a second because I can't do math.
- [79:50]
Bill Simmons
Nine and a half.
- [79:53]
Cousin Sal
I know what you're thinking.
- [79:57]
Bill Simmons
Can they just rest Brock Bowers for that game for fantasy reasons or if they're down 10, just not play him anymore. I need Brock bowers in week 15 and 16 get hurt in this game. Brock Bowers take it easy.
- [80:09]
Cousin Sal
Geno's going to take it easy.
- [80:11]
Bill Simmons
We know that Geno's just doesn't have it anymore.
- [80:15]
Cousin Sal
This is.
- [80:15]
Bill Simmons
There's just basic passes like over the middle where he'd. One pass in the second half, the guy's cutting across the middle and if he leads him a little I think it would have been a touchdown. But he throws it behind. The guy has to fall down and catch it. And it's just a lot of those. He just doesn't have it anymore. It's too bad. Germany game. Colts, Falcons. Pretty good game.
- [80:39]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Are you know, I feel like there's.
- [80:42]
Bill Simmons
Going to be like Germany more than England. That's my takeaway from this year.
- [80:45]
Cousin Sal
I think I was going to be like, hey, we didn't realize these teams were going to be decent at this point. We'd like to take a rain check. We'll send you something else. Hey, the jets are playing the Browns. We'll send you that instead.
- [80:56]
Bill Simmons
Let's get started. Another world war. England's like what the hell.
- [81:00]
Cousin Sal
Germany.
- [81:03]
Bill Simmons
Colts neutral field. I have in Vegas on five and a half over the Falcons.
- [81:08]
Cousin Sal
Oh, is this going to be one of these days. I had five, it's six and a Half.
- [81:13]
Bill Simmons
Oh. So what does that mean? If it was in Indianapolis, it'd be Colts by eight.
- [81:19]
Cousin Sal
Well, what was your team? Your team opened at five and a half at home, right? Colts are. Colts are.
- [81:25]
Bill Simmons
Right.
- [81:25]
Cousin Sal
It went down to four and a half, but the Colts are power ranked. Couple points better than Patriots. I guess that makes sense. Yeah.
- [81:33]
Bill Simmons
If we were playing the Falcons on a neutral field, that would have been like three or three and a half, Right?
- [81:38]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [81:38]
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
- [81:39]
Cousin Sal
I think that's fair. You just don't know what Atlanta team's ever going to show up here.
- [81:44]
Bill Simmons
Sunday's marquee game. We did it, Sal. We're back.
- [81:50]
Cousin Sal
You made it.
- [81:51]
Bill Simmons
Patriots are in the Sunday marquee game.
- [81:53]
Cousin Sal
No argument.
- [81:54]
Bill Simmons
They're sending Nansen, Romo and Tracy Woodson. Romo's going to do that. Okay, Jim, here we go. Here we go, Jim. Drink bay. How did he do it?
- [82:09]
Cousin Sal
Do you think he had to pay the Howard Letterman's estate? Is Howard Letterman still alive for that?
- [82:14]
Bill Simmons
Okay, Jim. I have Larry Holmes, 4 res to 2. I love Terrell Letterman.
- [82:21]
Cousin Sal
Oh, he's great.
- [82:23]
Bill Simmons
I have this as a hardcore tic TAC game. Bucks -1,2 at home against the New England Patriots.
- [82:31]
Cousin Sal
Okay, good. I get this one from you. I said three. It is two and a half. Oh. Oh, look how insulted you are.
- [82:38]
Bill Simmons
Well, so how healthy are the Bucks going to be?
- [82:41]
Cousin Sal
Well, I mean, you're playing them at the best spot, right? That's off a buy, right?
- [82:47]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, they were off the swim.
- [82:49]
Cousin Sal
I don't know how healthy.
- [82:51]
Bill Simmons
This guillotine league that we're in, which I've really enjoyed, it's the best.
- [82:57]
Cousin Sal
Everyone do a guillotine league. It's so much better. I just want to say it's like the scramble you have to make to add drop players every week. Whereas in your other leagues there's no players on the waiver wire. Yeah.
- [83:08]
Bill Simmons
Because every time somebody gets voted out. Yeah. You get their players or you get to bidding frenzy.
- [83:13]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [83:15]
Bill Simmons
So I tried to gamble this year and tried to not spend a lot of our thousand dollar budget on free agents and just tried to patch it together week after week hoping if we could get to week 10, I'd have more money than everybody else. And today I had Caleb Williams who had 38.7 points and single handedly carried me. I have Bucky Irving Mayfield and Anig Buka on the bench and I have more money than everyone else. I'm starting to get ideas and I.
- [83:42]
Cousin Sal
Might have four bench players, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's pretty Good.
- [83:46]
Bill Simmons
Starting to get ideas.
- [83:47]
Cousin Sal
Good. They light up your Patriots next week. You'll be happy.
- [83:50]
Bill Simmons
Well, Bucky Urban, I think, will be back. Right.
- [83:53]
Cousin Sal
They were saying it looks decent that he's back.
- [83:55]
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
- [83:56]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. I have a bunch of leaks, too.
- [83:58]
Bill Simmons
This is a tough. I. You know, obviously the Pats have won a few in a row here.
- [84:02]
Cousin Sal
You could lose one here. What is it, six in a row and six in a row against the spread. Just enough. It's enough. Let the other kids have a shot.
- [84:10]
Bill Simmons
I think they're going to make a trade. I really do. I think they're going to add somebody important. I think they're going to add an impact guy. I think the AFC is wide open and they know what they need. They need a pass rusher. If they got an awesome linebacker. Probably not conceivable, but, yeah. Offensive line, everybody's looking for that. Whatever pass rusher and extra receiver they.
- [84:29]
Cousin Sal
Need, it's going to be Vita Vella taken right off the Tampa roster. Thrown right in.
- [84:34]
Bill Simmons
Great. I take that to head. Sunday watchables. I only got one. Rams at San Francisco. I have the Rams favored by three points.
- [84:46]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I said one and a half. It is.
- [84:49]
Bill Simmons
It's three.
- [84:49]
Cousin Sal
Exactly. No, it's three and a half. But you get it. Three and a half and one, two.
- [84:54]
Bill Simmons
Probably Purdy for this.
- [84:56]
Cousin Sal
I mean, you keep saying that. Probably every Sunday night. We've said probably Purdy. But Mac Jones looked. No, no, he looked okay.
- [85:06]
Bill Simmons
Did these teams play already?
- [85:07]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, they played that Thursday night game, right?
- [85:08]
Bill Simmons
Oh, yeah. They beat him. Yeah. So bigger game for the Rams because they need to split this with the Niners or else. Yeah. Okay. That's our last watchable. Sorry, Sal.
- [85:24]
Cousin Sal
Is that really it?
- [85:26]
Bill Simmons
We have four fairly watchables. Ravens at Minnesota.
- [85:30]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, that was.
- [85:30]
Bill Simmons
That was the close. That's the only watchable. I guess I should be in a watchable at this point. It is.
- [85:35]
Cousin Sal
Vikings play good enough.
- [85:36]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. I mean, it's fair. I have the Ravens favored in that game by one and a half.
- [85:48]
Cousin Sal
Oh, I said four and a half. It is three and a half. Really? Yeah, really.
- [85:56]
Bill Simmons
So we're just all in on the Ravens as a contender again, even though they're.
- [85:59]
Cousin Sal
You have to be three and five.
- [86:00]
Bill Simmons
Really? Because they. They look good against Miami Dolphins, who fired their GM the next day and should have already fired their coach and bench their quarterback. We're just back.
- [86:08]
Cousin Sal
I think it's too. God. It wasn't against good teams, but they're deep. It was all about the defense. Right. Is this team going to allow 40 a game.
- [86:17]
Bill Simmons
Did you see the montage of all the terrible Tua passes? Actually watch that on espn. The next having coffee. They showed a montage of the all 22 of Tua just missing guys. It was like. It was like six passes.
- [86:30]
Cousin Sal
He's great. He's really good.
- [86:32]
Bill Simmons
Now we might be on. He'll be on Good morning Football in two years.
- [86:37]
Cousin Sal
Maybe that's one of the guys you trade for. You got a lot of money, good backup.
- [86:46]
Bill Simmons
Fairly watchables. 3 then Texans home for the Jaguars. I would have had this a watchable, but I'm going to guess C.J. stroud doesn't play in this game. Right.
- [86:56]
Cousin Sal
I can't.
- [86:57]
Bill Simmons
Concussion is usually you get scratched for a week.
- [87:00]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [87:01]
Bill Simmons
So knowing that, I'm going to say Texans by two and a half at home against the Jaguars.
- [87:05]
Cousin Sal
All right, I ease this one. I get. I said one. It's one and a half. Okay. That'll move around a bunch though, right?
- [87:13]
Bill Simmons
I thought ETN was really good today.
- [87:15]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, he did everything but score. I haven't been fantasy.
- [87:17]
Bill Simmons
He really had. He had a huge impact on that game. Michael. Brian Thomas got hurt. Brian Thomas had an awesome play over the middle, ran for 40 yards and got hurt. Was just when it was like, here he comes. He's back. Seahawks home for the Cardinals.
- [87:34]
Cousin Sal
Wow.
- [87:36]
Bill Simmons
I I in. I did these guesses in the afternoon and I guess Seahawks by six and a half. I'm bumping that to seven. Seahawks by seven.
- [87:45]
Cousin Sal
It's six and a half. But I had, I had eight. Now you win it.
- [87:49]
Bill Simmons
Oh, I win it.
- [87:50]
Cousin Sal
I had eight. I thought that should be higher. I don't know. Arizona, short week, going to Seattle.
- [87:57]
Bill Simmons
So you're playing them tomorrow and there's a weird Brissette Kyler Murray thing happening.
- [88:03]
Cousin Sal
Where Kyler Murray's available but not starting. Yeah. Yeah.
- [88:07]
Bill Simmons
I think their season's on the line.
- [88:10]
Cousin Sal
You know, KYLER Murray is nine and. Oh, at. @&t Stadium. He won like a schoolboy tournament there and he won his high school thing.
- [88:19]
Bill Simmons
I'm aware.
- [88:19]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [88:20]
Bill Simmons
It seems like they don't want him to play because if he does, well, then they're kind of stuck with him for the rest of the year because he played well in this Monday Night Football game in Dallas.
- [88:27]
Cousin Sal
Interesting.
- [88:28]
Bill Simmons
So they would rather play Brissette, maybe try to win anyway, but then they don't have this Kyler thing. I just think it's weird if he, if he's available to play and you're not playing him. Like if Drake May was Available to play. We would play Drake May, right?
- [88:43]
Cousin Sal
I think it's exactly that. Like Brissette. Anyone should look good, right? Going to.
- [88:48]
Bill Simmons
They don't want Kyler Murray anymore.
- [88:49]
Cousin Sal
It's a John Cowboys defense. Yeah. Yeah. Brissette almost beat the Colts in Indy, so might not be that bad.
- [88:58]
Bill Simmons
Third watch. Fairly watchable. This might be a poop factor if Daniels is out.
- [89:03]
Cousin Sal
Oh, yeah.
- [89:04]
Bill Simmons
Lions. Washington. I gotta change my pick on this. Yeah, I'm gonna change it. It's in Washington. How many points am I allowed to bump it up? Three.
- [89:12]
Cousin Sal
I'll bump mine three, you bump yours three.
- [89:14]
Bill Simmons
All right. I had minus six for the Lions, so I'll bump it to minus nine.
- [89:19]
Cousin Sal
Plus nine. Yeah, it's. You get it? Shit. It's eight and a half. I said six and a half. That was dumb. Dumb. Five to three.
- [89:29]
Bill Simmons
You're up, teaser.
- [89:30]
Cousin Sal
Oh, you love Detroit. Parlay Detroit and Denver so far. Let's keep going. You'll find another.
- [89:38]
Bill Simmons
Denver. I do like those two.
- [89:44]
Cousin Sal
Well, they're not going to screw us two weeks in a row. Come on.
- [89:47]
Bill Simmons
That does look. Broncos over the Raiders just to win by three. And then the Lions to win by. Watch that.
- [89:54]
Cousin Sal
There's another one for you.
- [89:55]
Bill Simmons
Oh, I see it here in the poop factor list.
- [89:57]
Cousin Sal
You see it?
- [89:57]
Bill Simmons
Bill's Dolphins.
- [89:58]
Cousin Sal
That's the one.
- [90:00]
Bill Simmons
Bills in Miami. DJ Mikey Mack staying for the rest of the year. The dj, it's gonna be spinning his records for seven more weeks here. I have Bills by nine over the Dolphins.
- [90:14]
Cousin Sal
I had nine and I got this. Exactly. Nine and a half it is. So there you go. Who. Who screws that up? Bills just to beat Miami. Detroit just to be Washington.
- [90:26]
Bill Simmons
Is it wrong that I'm still scared of Miami after that Falcons game?
- [90:31]
Cousin Sal
Extended rest. Their home. They played them tough when they played on that Thursday night, right? They covered. Yeah. Yeah. You shouldn't be scared.
- [90:40]
Bill Simmons
I gotta ask you, how many wins did the Dolphins end up with? Cause I may or may not have multiple win total unders at 6 and a half and 4 and a half and 3 and a half on them for the season.
- [90:51]
Cousin Sal
Oh, man.
- [90:52]
Bill Simmons
Right now they have two. Two, Right. They played the Bills, so that's a loss. They play the Commanders in Madrid. Saints home at jets at Steelers. Bengals home. Bucks at Patriots. Six seems improbable, right?
- [91:07]
Cousin Sal
Jets and Bengals, they have to split that for you to sweep 4 and 13.
- [91:11]
Bill Simmons
4 and 13. I win. I think every bet I made exceptions. One that was good for you.
- [91:16]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Don't get beat by the jets or get Beat by the Jets. Yeah. At Pat's Week 1802 seed that doesn't care. Oh, boy.
- [91:28]
Bill Simmons
I'll be able to hedge it. All right. Poop factor. Bears home for the Giants. We don't apologize for wins. We take. We're three and one in the second quarter.
- [91:46]
Cousin Sal
Thanks, coach. I wasn't planning on it. Apologize to the dry cleaner. Who is he supposed to apologize to?
- [91:53]
Bill Simmons
He might need a sedative before those speeches. He's, like, too jacked up. He gets too fired up.
- [91:57]
Cousin Sal
I think Caleb Williams should paint his nails before every game. Just calm him down a little bit.
- [92:03]
Bill Simmons
I thought Caleb was pretty good today.
- [92:06]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [92:07]
Bill Simmons
But then I kept remembering that he was playing the Bengals. Yeah, you just had to keep remembering. It was like watching your. One of your sons play a video game, but it's on the all rookie level. And you're like, whoa, Harrison's doing really well in this game. And it's like the easiest level.
- [92:22]
Cousin Sal
You know what he was good at, though? Like, all right, the Pat, the guy's wide open.
- [92:25]
Bill Simmons
Sure.
- [92:26]
Cousin Sal
The secondary sucks. He was pretty nifty in the pocket.
- [92:28]
Bill Simmons
Like, really.
- [92:29]
Cousin Sal
Bunch of times I thought he was going to get sacked and that. Like, to me, that's not all the. The front seven's fault. You know, they had a paw on him a bunch, but he was. He was good escaping.
- [92:39]
Bill Simmons
I had him on two of my fantasy teams and had very high hopes for him in that Bengals game. Yeah, the Bengals defense might be the first defense we've had in a while where you just want to start whatever quarterback is going against them. I think I guaranteed 25 fantasy points.
- [92:54]
Cousin Sal
Flacco is just. You see it in his face. It's just exhausting. These guys just want to kill all the defenders. What did they score, like 38, two games in a row. The only team to lose both games after scoring 30 ever. That doesn't seem right. Cowboys.
- [93:10]
Bill Simmons
Browns in New Jersey. This. I mean, this is like first pick. This is first pick in the draft, maybe.
- [93:23]
Cousin Sal
Oh, you think, like.
- [93:24]
Bill Simmons
No, just. It's in the, like, Jets, Brown, Saints. Those are probably three of the Titans. No. And Titans. Yeah, but I. I thought the Titans looked pretty encouraging today against the Chargers. I had that game on.
- [93:35]
Cousin Sal
I thought they just had a good start. They had a couple big fluky plays.
- [93:39]
Bill Simmons
Look good in that game. Yeah. I have a Jets minus one and a half at home.
- [93:44]
Cousin Sal
You nailed it. I do. I thought tick, tick, tack, but I really. I don't know why I thought the Browns would be favored by one and a half but one and a half.
- [93:51]
Bill Simmons
I'm really worried I'm going to put this in Ringer 107 as a. As the Browns plus one and a half.
- [93:58]
Cousin Sal
Right. Cause you always love just their defense on the road. You always love it.
- [94:03]
Bill Simmons
Well, that's why I hope I don't do that. But I just keep thinking of the Browns defense against the Jets. Just sounds delicious.
- [94:10]
Cousin Sal
Would this be a fun one to put Shador in if you were ever going to try him out in New York. Big good game. Right.
- [94:20]
Bill Simmons
The Sanders family needs something. Deon's getting annihilated at Colorado Panthers home against the Saints with a chance to go six and four. They're over under was six and a half.
- [94:34]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [94:35]
Bill Simmons
I have the Panthers by three and a half.
- [94:38]
Cousin Sal
I said five and a half. So we split that it's four and a half.
- [94:41]
Bill Simmons
No, they focus on us.
- [94:43]
Cousin Sal
The Saints can't be on the road getting less than to a five to a five win team.
- [94:49]
Bill Simmons
I'm not sure the Saints are going to win again.
- [94:51]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [94:53]
Bill Simmons
Sunday night the mother.
- [94:54]
Cousin Sal
The mother Shockers didn't have a ton.
- [94:57]
Bill Simmons
Sunday night Chargers, Steelers in LA with. There's going to be a lot of Steelers fans. Yeah, a lot.
- [95:06]
Cousin Sal
Like a lot.
- [95:08]
Bill Simmons
And I have the Chargers by two and a half.
- [95:13]
Cousin Sal
You edge me out here. I said two and it's three. Did you win again? 5, 6, 7, 8. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5.
- [95:20]
Bill Simmons
That's it. No, we got a Monday night game.
- [95:22]
Cousin Sal
We didn't do Giants, Bears.
- [95:24]
Bill Simmons
Did we. Did we pick it? I guess we talked about it and didn't actually pick it. Yeah, Bears home for the Giants. I had Bears by five and a half.
- [95:33]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. All right. I had five and it's three and a half.
- [95:36]
Bill Simmons
Oh, so you win that one.
- [95:37]
Cousin Sal
I don't think that's enough though. One, two, three, four, five, six. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight.
- [95:42]
Bill Simmons
What happened?
- [95:43]
Cousin Sal
We ran out of games. These teams can't be on buys. I need more games here.
- [95:47]
Bill Simmons
I'm sorry again. Sunday night Chargers, Steelers.
- [95:53]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, we did it.
- [95:54]
Bill Simmons
No, I know, but it's just.
- [95:56]
Cousin Sal
Let's do it again.
- [95:57]
Bill Simmons
A lot of Aaron Rodgers in. In primetime games. Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. And it seemed dubious before the year, but they've actually been pretty entertaining. This works out Monday night Pac.
- [96:11]
Cousin Sal
Sorry. Before I move on, they are going to have to move Washington out. Washington's got some prime slots here. They play in Denver on Sunday Night Football. They put. Can you bounce a Madrid game? The Madrid game against the Dolphins. That's pretty bad. Washington against Miami might That might.
- [96:28]
Bill Simmons
Instead of a loser leaves town. That might be a loser stays here. Match loser just has to stay in the globe.
- [96:34]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [96:35]
Bill Simmons
Oh, man. Hey, Madrid, we hope you guys like football. Here's to attack the Boa. And Marcus Mariota, we hope you like this.
- [96:45]
Cousin Sal
Good luck pronouncing their names and then watching.
- [96:51]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So they have Washington's on that. I mean, at all those TV games you listed, the Christmas one's probably the biggest hit.
- [96:58]
Cousin Sal
Oh, yeah. Against my 10.
- [97:00]
Bill Simmons
That's a really tough one. Yeah. Because that's one of those where you don't. You're not going to the streamer intentionally.
- [97:07]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [97:07]
Bill Simmons
You're not like, stumbling across that one. All right, Sunday night or Monday night, we have Packers, Eagles, which I mentioned. I have packers in Green Bay favored by two and a half.
- [97:19]
Cousin Sal
All right, well, you. So you win. Anyway, I said two. It is two and a half. And watch the packers be great. And we're talking about how they're the best team in the league again because they look. They look past.
- [97:31]
Bill Simmons
Let's not do that again. Let's all agree not to do that again. They burned our trust too many times.
- [97:36]
Cousin Sal
I don't get it. I don't get it. I also think if you wear like, 1920s outfits, you're destined to play that way a little bit. You're going to go 3 yards a clip and then you're going to get stuck on fourth down, and that's.
- [97:48]
Bill Simmons
That. That's a step on parent corner. But the packers are like my son, where he's like, when are you going to be home? I'm going to be home at 3:30. Let's hang out. And then he comes home at like 7:30. So I thought you're gonna be home at 3:30. Oh, yeah, right. I went there instead. Now I'm home.
- [98:05]
Cousin Sal
Oh, yeah.
- [98:06]
Bill Simmons
And after a while when. When he gives me a time, I just don't believe it until he actually walks through the front door. The times are green.
- [98:13]
Cousin Sal
Should we guess, like, what time?
- [98:15]
Bill Simmons
Best of packers at all anymore. The packers, like, we're gonna win. We're taking this seriously. We're going for the Super Bowl. It's like, cool.
- [98:20]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [98:20]
Bill Simmons
I don't trust you.
- [98:21]
Cousin Sal
I think that should be added to a line.
- [98:22]
Bill Simmons
All right.
- [98:23]
Cousin Sal
Ben says he's gonna be at home at 3:30. All right. What? Bill, what'd you pick?
- [98:27]
Bill Simmons
Sounds like 7:25, 5:15. Ooh.
- [98:30]
Cousin Sal
You get it. I picked 6:30. It's a good one.
- [98:32]
Bill Simmons
Today he said 1:30 and he came home at 5:30. Which is anytime he can be an extra four. And there's always a weird excuse too. Yeah, always something with like the girlfriend we had, we didn't realize we had to study. It's always that we didn't realize.
- [98:44]
Cousin Sal
He's like a mattress delivery company. He gets a four hour window. Right.
- [98:49]
Bill Simmons
Or spectrum cable.
- [98:51]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [98:51]
Bill Simmons
Be there between nine and one. All right, that's it for guest alliance. I'm sorry.
- [98:58]
Cousin Sal
Screw you.
- [99:04]
Bill Simmons
I don't have the parent corner. I guess I'll have to do that read. I don't have the read for that. See this is one of the. What are you going to do? We're live on YouTube. We'll just have to insert it in after the fact. Parent corner, go ahead, let's hear what you got.
- [99:21]
Cousin Sal
All right, so you know, so we're trying to raise funds for Cooperstown, which is the end of July, right. So this is my 12 year old. Harrison's team goes up there and it costs like a lot of money so we want to offset a few of the costs. So one of the parents runs a, like a little league league actually and has access to fields and was nice enough to throw a fundraiser where all 8 year old teams from all over the area would come and play and the 12 year olds, Harrison and his buddies would umpire. Right. So they had to go through some slight training but they, you know, whatever, they're, they're umping eight year old games so it's okay. So Harrison's going to four games this weekend, so two yesterday, two today and I'm not going to watch him ump two games. Right. There's too much college football for me to bet on.
- [100:05]
Bill Simmons
So wait, you were expected as a parent to watch him be an umpire?
- [100:09]
Cousin Sal
I don't think so. But he had to get there and had to pick him up. So when I picked him up, I caught the end of his second game and he did fine. Like he didn't screw up, right. You know, it's just two close plays at first and that was it. So. And then he went back today and my wife Melissa was in charge of it. So I get home from watching games today and she says to me, she's like, I was like, how did he do today? She's like, well, I thought he did well, but one of the fathers was complaining about a couple of his calls. I was like, you were watching and you saw this? She's like, yeah, he was pissed that his kids team lost and he's like, well we probably would have won if there weren't so many botched calls. And I was like, well, he was probably kidding around. Did he know Harris? He's like, no, he wasn't kidding. And I said, well, did you say anything to him? She's like, no, he's an idiot. And I said, well, who was it? And he says, I don't know. I think Michelle knows who it is. I'm like, well, tell Michelle to tell me who the fuck it is. Because now I got. Who the hell is going off on a 12 year old umpire in an 8 year old game? Well, he didn't yell anything. He was just very vocal. And I'm like, yeah, that's enough. If he was vocal and like pointing out my son like, that's.
- [101:13]
Bill Simmons
That's weird.
- [101:13]
Cousin Sal
So she's like, well, what are you going to do? I'm like, I'll. I'll think of something. And so I said to Harrison, I'm like, what? What happened? He's like, dad, I was right about both calls. The runner came off the base. He came off second base twice. It happened like within an inning. And I called him out. I was. I was like right there. So I was like, really pissed off. Like, I don't know what I'm going to do. But you know, Michelle, if. If you're listening, I want names. I want to find out. I need to know this is. And then I realized like an hour before the podcast, I'm like, this was me four years ago. So what can I really do here?
- [101:47]
Bill Simmons
It's all come full circle.
- [101:49]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, it really is such a mess. I still want his name.
- [101:52]
Bill Simmons
I still can't believe you haven't been in a near altercation on the sidelines. Keep waiting to see that on team.
- [101:59]
Cousin Sal
Would that be great? Would that be just the best to catch that?
- [102:02]
Bill Simmons
I would love it.
- [102:03]
Cousin Sal
Didn't what's her name get arrested for that? Janice Soprano.
- [102:07]
Bill Simmons
Wasn't that an episode? Remember a million Parent Corners ago, my wife got into it with some older lady who was the grandmother of another team and was going off on the lady.
- [102:18]
Cousin Sal
Right, right, right, right. Yeah, grandmothers are. They're rough. They are really. They get in there.
- [102:24]
Bill Simmons
Well, I found the sponsor, by the way. Today's Parent corner is brought to you by Workday. Are you a forward thinker? Then you need an HR and finance platform that thinks like you do. Workday is the AI platform that helps propel your organization, your workforce, your entire industry into the future. Workday. Moving business forever forward. Learn more at workday. Com. My parent corner. My son turned 18 this weekend.
- [102:47]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, Saw that. Good job.
- [102:50]
Bill Simmons
When they get to 18, it's different than when you have a daughter that gets with the sons. It's like you just start thinking of all the missed calls where they may not have made it to 18. The times they almost bled to death or the time when they fell or they almost fell down the stairs or they dropped a rock on their foot. It's weird. It's not exactly. You're not just thinking. It's not like a Hallmark card. It's just missed calls. But we had a party and then my son was supposed to be home today to help clean up after backyard some stuff out there. And instead took his girlfriend to breakfast and then somehow ended up back at her place and then told us that she got him as one of his birthday gifts, a puppy yoga session. Are you familiar with these?
- [103:43]
Cousin Sal
What is that?
- [103:45]
Bill Simmons
So this is something. This is like an LA thing. That's pretty funny actually. But I've never done it.
- [103:51]
Cousin Sal
I'm gonna hate this. What is it?
- [103:53]
Bill Simmons
It's in Burbank. It's. You relax, stretch and cuddle puppies in a unique yoga experience. So that's what my son was doing at some point today. And he was supposed to come home at 1:30 to clean up and came home when it was dark at 5:30 and then immediately started making himself food. And I was like, you're going to clean up in the back. And he said, dad, I haven't eaten yet. And I was just like, happy birthday. I'm glad he made it to 18. He's now more like a roommate, right? I would say more. Less like a son, more like a roommate. That we're renting out a studio one bedroom apartment to. In the second floor of our house.
- [104:30]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [104:30]
Bill Simmons
And he just kind of comes in and you have to go in and you have to go like, hey, hey, the cable bill. It's. You know, we. We got to pay the last two months. I just need a check or Venmo me. Yeah, yeah. I'll get to it. I'll get to it. Yeah. Happy 18 to Ben.
- [104:47]
Cousin Sal
I'm gonna. I have to hit him up. I'm gonna contact him because you're not. You're not focused on the right thing. You want him to clean the fucking backyard. Who cares? He should not be doing puppy yoga. He can't.
- [104:57]
Bill Simmons
He can't do it.
- [104:58]
Cousin Sal
He can't. This is a gift your girlfriend gives you.
- [105:01]
Bill Simmons
Puppy Puppy Yoga Club.
- [105:02]
Cousin Sal
You say, thank you. I'm gonna go. And then you lie to her and say you went and it was great, but you don't need to do it again. But they went together. They probably went together.
- [105:11]
Bill Simmons
They went together.
- [105:12]
Cousin Sal
Oh, Ben. All right. Puppy yoga.
- [105:20]
Bill Simmons
We went through a lot of the college app process, which I know you went through with, with Archie. And it's just so different than when we were applying to college a million years ago.
- [105:31]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [105:31]
Bill Simmons
There's like early decision, there's early action, there's the common app, there's these essays. But then there's like these 200 word little mini essays where they tie it to what school? How do you see something specific to the school and all these little things and they try to flip stuff around to try to find out more of you. I was thinking about how haphazard it was when you were going to college.
- [105:56]
Cousin Sal
Oh, it didn't matter.
- [105:57]
Bill Simmons
It's like, where are you applying? I don't know. These schools. And then it's like, yeah, there's an essay and then you got to send them a transcript. 50 bucks, two teachers, right? Yeah.
- [106:05]
Cousin Sal
Does he have regrets? Does he have anything? Carrie's yelling at him, saying, I told you you should have worked here or you should have volunteered here. Because that's, that's a lot.
- [106:13]
Bill Simmons
No, it's actually. It worked out great because he's writing a 650 word essay about how the puppy yoga class changed his life.
- [106:20]
Cousin Sal
Good. Rejected. How.
- [106:23]
Bill Simmons
How puppy yoga taught me a more sensitive side of myself. I want to do it now. It sounds great. I gotta. Maybe I should have brought them on.
- [106:32]
Cousin Sal
Let's do it. Let's let's. You know, we don't have to be that gritty, but come on.
- [106:39]
Bill Simmons
Speaking of parent quarter.
- [106:40]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [106:42]
Bill Simmons
My daughter's in the playoffs next week for soccer.
- [106:44]
Cousin Sal
Oh, nice.
- [106:44]
Bill Simmons
And had a great season and it was really fun to watch her. The Div.3 athletes across the board. There's a lot of colleges. These kids are 18, 19, 20, 21, 22 grad school students. They're doing all their stuff and then on the side also playing for these teams and they're committed to it and it's just cool. I really think for. If you care about sports, like the D3 athletes putting in the time when they don't really have to, you know, it's not like they're going to school for scholarship and it's almost like a job and they made a commitment. Like this is a little different.
- [107:19]
Cousin Sal
Are you going out there for it?
- [107:21]
Bill Simmons
Of course I'm going out there.
- [107:22]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Do you feel like she gets more nervous or. I mean, I'm sure She likes when I.
- [107:28]
Bill Simmons
She likes when I go. Maybe 10 years ago would have been more nervous.
- [107:30]
Cousin Sal
Oh really? Look at you. You're all grown up. Nice.
- [107:32]
Bill Simmons
No, I just go. I have my little spots. I don't do the pacing and it's really fun. Only second to last year ever.
- [107:40]
Cousin Sal
If for whatever reason there's a 12 year old ref to take it easy on him.
- [107:43]
Bill Simmons
All right, there might be a 12 year old ref for the round one playoff game. We'll see. Anyway, good luck to. Good luck to Emerson. Good luck to everybody in the puppy yoga class.
- [107:53]
Cousin Sal
And that's a baby doll. Good luck.
- [107:55]
Bill Simmons
By the way, that was today's paracorder. It was sponsored by Workday.com learn more at workday. So we completed October, we reached daylight savings time, we got through the World Series. NBA is starting to calm down a little bit now. We have actually a feel for the teams and what's happening. Football is in the grind. Are you starting to get sad about football? This is right when it really starts to hit you?
- [108:22]
Cousin Sal
No, not yet. Not yet. Should I be? You tell me when.
- [108:25]
Bill Simmons
I think, well, we're almost at the halfway point now. We're at the half point of the regular season. Right. Headed toward Thanksgiving.
- [108:34]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [108:34]
Bill Simmons
Playoffs. Yeah, I guess we're. No, you start to get sad like after Thanksgiving is when they.
- [108:40]
Cousin Sal
Right. I would say that's, that's it. Yes. Right after all the food is wrapped up and given away on Thanksgiving. I was definitely, I'm not gonna lie, I was definitely sad when Jordan Love threw that pass in the end zone to a guy in an opposite puppy yoga. Did it right. He really did.
- [108:55]
Bill Simmons
Right to somebody.
- [108:56]
Cousin Sal
Yoga pass.
- [108:59]
Bill Simmons
So that was it.
- [108:59]
Cousin Sal
But yeah.
- [109:01]
Bill Simmons
All right.
- [109:02]
Cousin Sal
By the way, I bet, I'm sorry, I bet against your Celtics. I thought you were too, too high on the Celtics packing it in. And I told House Wednesday I'm like, I'm taking Boston over Cleveland here at home. I'm taking the money line and. And there you go. So you're going to bounce, you're going to jump back here. They're going to, they're going to make a run at the NBA cup and then they're going to suck again.
- [109:21]
Bill Simmons
Right. It's weird. Them in Indiana. There's just so much infrastructure from being good once upon a time that like Indiana beat Golden State last night. Right. This guy, Quentin Jackson Carlisle is just regenerating guards in his garage that you've never heard of. And the guy had like 25 points, 10 assists. But there, you know, there's proud Dudes on each team and they play these games and they're especially like national TV or against a good team and they. So I don't know. I feel like all these teams are going to be probably closer to.500. I wonder if the league's so deep now that we're just going to see a lot of weird Charlotte beat who like Phoenix beat San Antonio tonight. Makes no sense. San Antonio hadn't lost all year. Phoenix beat him by 20 and shut down Wemby. You know, all these teams are pretty talented.
- [110:11]
Cousin Sal
You were very excited about Brooklyn, our NBA cup parlay that you put together. We're like, all right.
- [110:17]
Bill Simmons
Oh yeah. What was that? Read that one.
- [110:20]
Cousin Sal
Oh, shit. Now I don't have it.
- [110:21]
Bill Simmons
Philadelphia, Milwaukee, San Antonio and OKC. And it was 116 to 1 on FanDuel.
- [110:29]
Cousin Sal
Just to win their groups.
- [110:31]
Bill Simmons
Right? To win their groups. And then Philadelphia lost to Boston.
- [110:34]
Cousin Sal
That's all right. We'll get it back.
- [110:36]
Bill Simmons
But they can still. They can still get there. Yeah, we were excited. We needed something to make the NBA cup more fun. All right, cuz we'll see you on the ringer gambling show Tuesday.
- [110:44]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [110:45]
Bill Simmons
Wednesday, Friday, and then the pregnancy. Maybe at the end of the year, we'll have you rank the shows and see which one you like the most.
- [110:51]
Cousin Sal
All right. Okay, good.
- [110:53]
Bill Simmons
And then Raheem, did we settle the thing where he tried to cheat on the Sunday pregame show or.
- [110:57]
Cousin Sal
No, we didn't settle it. I don't know what you could have settled it and you could have said minus 120s or less.
- [111:02]
Bill Simmons
I think minus 120 should be the. The highest you can go on a single bet.
- [111:06]
Cousin Sal
He gets mad cause he thinks they're moving during the show, but it never moves against him. I just, I. Anyway, he lost. He wanted to take the Chargers -9 and a half and not 10 or 10 and a half as FanDuel had it. And so whatever, I gave it to him. But still in first place.
- [111:23]
Bill Simmons
All right, that's it. We're wrapping it up here on YouTube, cuz, as always, great job by you. Good job by you. All right, that's it for the podcast. Thanks to cousin Sal. Thanks to Jonathan and Eduardo as well. I'm going to be back with the Rewatchables Monday night. I'm not sure of the schedule of my podcast this week because I'm going back east to watch some soccer. So I know we're going to have a Thursday podcast and hopefully one more during the week. So stay tuned, bear with me. And I will see you a little bit later in the week on this feed. Must be 21 plus on President select states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star Casino or 18 Plus. I'm present in D.C. kentucky or Wyoming. Gambling Problem Call 100 Gambler, visit rg-help.com, call 888-79-7777 or visit ccpg.orgchatinconnecticut or mdgamblinghelp.org In Maryland, Hope is here. Visit gamblinghelplinema.org or call 800-327-5050 for 24. 7 support in Massachusetts or call 877-8-HOPE NY or text Hopeny in New York.