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The Bill Simmons Podcast
The Chiefs Break Buffalo’s Heart, Philly Rolls, and Guess the SB Lines With Cousin Sal
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- [00:00]
Bill Simmons
Coming up, the last edition of Guess the Lines with Cousin Sal. We're going to talk Super Bowl. We're going to talk conference finals. It's all next. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. State Farm helps you score an affordable price when you choose to bundle home and auto insurance with the personal price plan. Bundling home and auto, that's a pro move. Just another way you can save on your insurance needs. Talk to a State Farm agent today to learn how you can bundle and save with the personal price plan. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state. This episode is brought to you by Rocket Money. You sign up for something, forget about it after the trial period ends, then you're charged month after month after month. The subscriptions are there, but you're not using them. In fact, I just learned that 85% of people have at least one paid subscription going unused each month. Thanks to Rocket Money. You can see all your subscriptions in one place. Cancel the ones you're not using anymore. Now you're saving money. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions. You have so many of these monitors your spending and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. See all of your subscriptions in one place. Know exactly where your money is going. For ones you don't want anymore, Rocket Money can help you cancel them. Rocket money over 5 million users. They've saved a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to $740 a year when using all the app's premium features. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions. Reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.comBill today. That's RocketMoney.comBill. we're also brought to you by the Ringer Podcast Network. I do have a new Rewatchables episode coming for you on Monday night. Can't wait for you to hear it. You can also watch on The Ringer Movies YouTube channel as well. Coming up on this podcast, Cousin Sal is joining me. We did this live on YouTube which you can follow if you want to on The Bill Simmons YouTube channel. Please subscribe. We are going to be breaking down the two games today and what's coming up in the super bowl. And I have a very action packed parent corner for you. So it's all next. First, our friends from Projet. All right, we are on YouTube. Cousin Sal is here taping the BS podcast after another magical NFL playoff game. Sal, I've had the worst weekend, and I can't wait to talk to you about it. This game reinvigorated me. It poured a Red Bull and a coffee and a giant line of cocaine into my body. I am ready for this podcast, baby.
- [03:00]
Cousin Sal
All right, so, okay. So good. That means you took the Chiefs, and I had them, too, but just as an emotional hedge. And then you look back, I'm like, oh, my God, I have so much money on this team. As an emotional hedge. It's going to be emotional the other way when I have to explain to the family we have to move if the Bills win. So, wow, what a game. Do it again. Do it every year. Who cares?
- [03:20]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So there's going to be a lot of stuff over the next two weeks about Chiefs. Eagles, we had this already. The Chiefs are back. Come on. Here's where I've landed, and I feel like I've been here for most of my life, but really, especially as I get older, I really like true greatness. Like, I really appreciate this Chiefs team. I bet on them. I really wanted them to cover the bet, obviously. But I also really like the fact that every once in a while in sports, you have this measuring stick, not just for the sport, but for all the sports. Right. Like, I hated the Yankees in the late 80s or late 90s. I hated that team, but I respected the shit out of them. When Arizona beat him in 2001, it was like, this is momentous. The Pats were able to get that in the mid 2010s, and Philly beat them with Foles and Peterson and was like, this feels momentous. I think you need teams like that. When the warriors lost in 2019, you need teams every once in a while that are truly great, and then you see how everyone measures up. And they did it again. I don't know when this stops.
- [04:23]
Cousin Sal
Of course you do. Yeah. You don't want parody in everything all the time, everywhere. Like, you know, I think if you ask people, honestly, they would want Washington and Buffalo to have advanced today. Right? So that wasn't going to happen because everybody wanted it, Right. Other than that, I love that the Chiefs are in it and Mahomes is great, and we saw the greatest quarterback of all time in Brady, and now we're possibly seeing his greatest successor in Mahomes. And that is exactly why I hate when people lead with all the referees screwed them all the. Like. No, I don't like the negative stigma because that then football could turn into your crappy sport, sorry, the NBA and where everybody's talking bad about it and like, hey, we're forgetting the fact that we're seeing Mahomes and he's the greatest or whatever, or close to the greatest. So stop that talk. You know. Yeah.
- [05:08]
Bill Simmons
That Buffalo doesn't get the two point and Casey gets the ball down. One fourth quarter and you're just going, mahomes. Mahomes is taking this down. He's going to score. He's going to get the two point and they're going to be up seven. I was already mentally in the stage of if Buffalo then gets the ball and scores the td, will they go for one or two? Like, the Chiefs hadn't even done anything yet. You just knew they were going to go down and do it. I mean, the Mahomes thing, just big picture, this is now five Super bowl appearances before age 30. He's 20 and three in the playoffs. He's beaten Josh Allen, who I think along with Burrow, but I think Allen over Burrow and probably over Lamar. Allen's his number one rival. He's beaten him four times in a row now in the playoffs.
- [05:53]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [05:53]
Bill Simmons
And. And he just feels like, it feels like that Brady versus Mahomes, that first playoff game that the first playoff loss Mahomes had and Brady beats him. And then it's like he just handed a torch to him and he's like, all right, go ahead, take it. And now it just feels like the Chiefs became the Pats.
- [06:10]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, he handed the torch. And Mahomes, I think, like played a little game with the Bills. Like, look, we don't turn the ball over. We haven't turned the ball over since November. There's been like 280 turnovers in the NFL and none of us, none of them attributed to the Chiefs. So what do they do? They fumble recovered, but they're offsides, the Bills. So it doesn't count like two plays later. Like, all right, we're going to give you one more chance. This is it. And even this isn't going to matter. And they fumble. And that was the only turnover of the game. Right. And still they couldn't get it done because you got the Chiefs with the ball last and that's what's going to happen.
- [06:43]
Bill Simmons
Well, you have. On the flip side, Buffalo. Allen comes out first drive. He throws two picks that get dropped.
- [06:49]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [06:50]
Bill Simmons
Allen fumbles twice, pulls back both of them recovers both of them, including on that fourth and one. I did have a moment where I thought to myself, Maybe this doesn't happen because I remember in the Pats Eagles super bowl, which I sadly watched with nephew Kyle, even at the bitter end, I don't even remember what the score was, but the Pats did get the ball with a little over two minutes left and they were on the 20 and we were all like, we're winning this. And then when Brady got stripped, it was so shocking. It was like, oh my God, somebody beat us. Um, that's. There was a moment in this game, it w. It was when Buffalo was driving, wondering if they were going to go for two or not and thinking like, what happens if like they go for two? They get it in Casey. Just something weird happens and all of a sudden they're punting and they're down one and Buffalo has a chance to just run out the clock on them. But that's the thing. KC's avoided this. They say, what'd they say? 17 straight, one possession wins?
- [07:48]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, it was 16. And, and because of that, when they're driving at the end and they're minus 1:46. I'm crazy about the numbers. As you know.
- [07:56]
Bill Simmons
I. Yeah, you retract every time out.
- [07:59]
Cousin Sal
I don't know what the hell to do with the numbers, but I'm wild about them. I just love. And it's minus 1:46. I'm like, wow, that's suspiciously low for this team that's going for a three piece and never loses one score games. And then they were -1:54 when they had the three point lead and the Bills were driving or whatever with that last possession there. So it is just amazing what the hell they've done. And I look at the numbers, I'm like, it doesn't even really add up with Mahomes and his stats and how they keep winning and you know, I.
- [08:28]
Bill Simmons
Didn'T have an incredible game. He, he ran for two touchdowns. He only threw for one. Yeah, the stats, the, the team stats were pretty even.
- [08:36]
Cousin Sal
You know how the Bills outrush them by just 12 yards. Like I don't remember a two.
- [08:41]
Bill Simmons
It felt like 200 and like Cook.
- [08:43]
Cousin Sal
Wasn'T in the game on a couple of big plays. I do think McDermott, who by the way, they found out he's Bill Burr's brother. I didn't even know this. They found out.
- [08:51]
Bill Simmons
Oh, is he.
- [08:51]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, yeah. Isn't that something they talked about?
- [08:53]
Bill Simmons
I didn't hear them in an.
- [08:54]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, yeah, he got out coached. He got bailed out I think early when they scored on, on fourth down, but he was out Coached and Spags wasn't going to let it happen twice in an hour.
- [09:05]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, this was a weird game because Lombardi. Shout out to Lombardi always used to talk about the middle eight. The last four minutes of the first half, first four minutes of the second half, the Chiefs have the ball and they're driving down. In the last four minutes of the first half, they get that crazy worthy call that we do this all the time. I still don't understand the rules of football, and I watch football. Neither guy had possession and the ball touched the ground, and it just seems like that's a dead play. Nobody gets it. And they're back at. They should have gone back to the 20 instead of the 5. Whatever. So they score and you start going, wow, this could be a blowout. They're up 2110. They stop the Buffalo here at the end of the half. They get the ball. The Chiefs at the start of the.
- [09:48]
Cousin Sal
Well, they didn't stop them. The Bills scored.
- [09:51]
Bill Simmons
But I'm saying before the Bills went down, it felt like the Chiefs were going to blow the game open.
- [09:55]
Cousin Sal
I got you. Yeah, yeah, right.
- [09:56]
Bill Simmons
Buffalo comes back down. He hits Matt Collins in that touchdown. It's 21:16. Now all of a sudden, the Chiefs get stopped at the top of the. So they actually lost the middle eight because then Buffalo came down and took the lead and they still. And they still won. The Chiefs, somehow. Yeah.
- [10:11]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, it was weird because. Yeah, you're right, because the Chiefs got the ball in the second half. Is that what you're saying? And then they.
- [10:16]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I thought they were going to get last possession in the first half. First possession, second half, you score both times, you're up 28, 10.
- [10:22]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, they didn't. The Bills had the ball and then hooked. Yeah, it's. It was interesting. It really was. And like, let's put everything in perspective with that play that hit the ground and should have been called incomplete. It was holding on Hamlin, he, like, mug. Kelsey, like, backpacked him, jumped on his back. So it would have been first down at the 20. Maybe the Bills don't have enough time to draw, drive back and get the six. I don't know that the Chief score either, but, you know, but let's. Before everybody points to. Oh, the Chiefs got lucky again.
- [10:49]
Bill Simmons
No, that turned out to help Buffalo. That's like the challenge had been overturned. I don't. You're right. They probably don't get more first down. Right. That was the one real mistake that the Chiefs made, was leaving Hollins open on that one.
- [11:01]
Cousin Sal
Play.
- [11:01]
Bill Simmons
Holland's ended up having two big plays. His over under for catches was basically. I think it was one catch. It was. It was around even. It was like minus 130, something like that. If, if, if I'm Buffalo and I leave this game, do you leave this game going? How did we not win that game? Or do you leave that game going? We're just like three plays short. Every time we play this team, we have the 4th and 1. The QB sneak where Allen actually gets stuffed. Who knows if he actually got stuffed or not, but they called it KC ball. You have the Kincaid play where. I don't know. That was the fourth and five spags caused the blitz. You knew it was coming. Allen makes a great. Just to jump up and heave it toward Kincaid was great. But they had that wide shot of it and it seemed like the ball was almost like spinning. It was almost like, like when a baseball, when they hit like the. The pop fly that just is like, has some weird thing to it. And KK dropped it and I'm sure he's gonna take shit tomorrow, but I actually thought that seemed like a pretty tough catch. Did you think that was a drop or a catch?
- [12:07]
Cousin Sal
It was rough. There was traffic around him. It was kind of like a moon ball, you know, and he's got to catch it at his feet. Probably should have grabbed it, but in that situation, like, that's. He was running for his life and he's just trying to get good positioning on that ball. But it's the kind of play that.
- [12:24]
Bill Simmons
A D back drops over and over again.
- [12:26]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [12:27]
Bill Simmons
Like the tip play at the line or the flutter. And it's. Oh, I can't believe he dropped that. And. But Kincaid was on offense.
- [12:33]
Cousin Sal
But to answer your original question, the Bills are looking at this like, not that we're three plays away that they should have won the game. Like, they're done losing to this team. Right. They already beat them in the regular season. They're not like us. Well, we could rationalize it and be like, well, they just can't beat him at Arrowhead. It's a different beast. They. They know deep down they're just as good and they can't take it. This is a demoralizing loss for them. I mean, after a while, you do maybe believe that you can't. You can't overtake the beast. But. Yeah, another.
- [13:02]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, I don't know. I.
- [13:05]
Cousin Sal
Well, there's the what more do we have to do Factor. Right? They won time of possess. They won the. They won the turnover Battle, they outrushed them. Mahomes had fewer than 20 completions.
- [13:17]
Bill Simmons
Right.
- [13:17]
Cousin Sal
You know, like, I don't know, they scored 29 and they became the first team to give up over 30 to the Chiefs. Weird.
- [13:26]
Bill Simmons
Well, so the Chiefs have the ball after the two minute warning. The Bills don't get it and the Bills need to get a stop. Did you think they were going to get the stop? Because I did not. And as it turns out, they had two chances to get a stop because the Bills scored. They got the first down on second down, but the guy stepped out of bounds. So now they had this fresh set of downs and each time the Chiefs were able to get the eight, nine plays. Conversely, Buffalo had a bunch of chances to make a big play on a 4th and 1 or 4th and 5, 4th and 3 and, and there was a couple they didn't get. So I, I would, I would assume that would probably be. Yeah, the short driving them crazy too. They did get that when they were down, what was it, seven. When they got the fourth down play in the end zone to Samuel.
- [14:08]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [14:09]
Bill Simmons
Which was a nice play. That was big. I didn't think they were going to get that one.
- [14:12]
Cousin Sal
McDermott need, sorry. Spags needed to dial up what he did for the very last Bills offensive play, for that fourth down play because it came out of a timeout. They have a timeout and then one play on third down and then that play. So that was bad for the Chiefs defense. But I'll tell you, right, with the short yardage and I think we, I think we watched almost three and a half hours of quarterbacks plunging on fourth and one.
- [14:35]
Bill Simmons
Today, between the two games, the most fourth and ones have felt like ever in the history of the league.
- [14:40]
Cousin Sal
I like that they don't make it sometimes.
- [14:42]
Bill Simmons
I really do.
- [14:43]
Cousin Sal
Like maybe, maybe teams. I don't like it. Like when we were growing up in the 70s and 80s where, you know, it was a fourth and one attempt on offense every six weeks or something, but I don't know, just be. Be a little more creative on the fourth and ones. But Cook wasn't even in the backfield for a lot of those.
- [15:00]
Bill Simmons
So Buffalo missed two, two points, right?
- [15:03]
Cousin Sal
Two, two point.
- [15:04]
Bill Simmons
Then they missed a fourth and short. And you would think with Allen they would be the most devastating team in the league with any 4th and 1, 4th and short, 2 point, which was, I don't know, one of the legacies of this game. It was kind of shocking not to see them get certain plays. I felt like the Chiefs were slightly better Just because I felt like their defense, I trusted their D a little bit more to maybe get a stop when they really, really, really, really needed it. Even that you mentioned that spag splits on the last play, that fourth and five. This goes back to what I was saying earlier about how fun it is to have a team like this, that we have a real history with it. You know, we root for these NFL teams and the entire team changes over in two years, you know, or you have these teams, like, look at what's going to happen in the Cowboys, and they haven't even made the Super Bowl. But two years from now, I don't.
- [15:54]
Cousin Sal
Know, we lost a connection. What did you say?
- [15:57]
Bill Simmons
Two years from now, are Dak, CD, Lamb and Prescott all going to be in the team? Probably not. You know, and that's usually how it plays out.
- [16:04]
Cousin Sal
I know, you're right.
- [16:06]
Bill Simmons
You're right. But in this team, same infrastructure, it's Mahomes, it's always some cast of running backs with. And wide receivers with Kelsey. They always have a decent line. Chris Jones is always there. Andy Reid always is doing some funky plays that seem like they're going to work. And then spags every time they need it seems to dial up the perfect blitz. That. That blitz on Allen was a great call. I was waiting for it the whole game, and it didn't seem like they could find it. Then they found it.
- [16:34]
Cousin Sal
That's what they needed before the last score. But you and I, I think, thought we were texting. We thought this game was over. Like you said that second.
- [16:41]
Bill Simmons
I did. I thought when it was 2110, I thought. I thought they were going to blow it out.
- [16:44]
Cousin Sal
Well. Cause I mean, they were picking on that Elam guy. Like, you know, like Romo said it, he's like, you know, um, cover one single safety. It's just going to be the stop, right route all the time with Worthy picking on this.
- [16:56]
Bill Simmons
Great.
- [16:57]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. So, by the way, Romo crushed Brady today, like by 35 points. That was the biggest blowout.
- [17:03]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Romo, I thought was. That was about as good as he's been in a few years. I thought he was all over the game, spelling, spotting stuff, spelling stuff out, telling us what was going to happen. I. With. With the Buffalo piece. The defense had a couple injuries and it was pretty. I don't want to say flimsy, but it was a. It was okay. Never like a great defense to begin with. It reminded me a little of what happened to Washington today. Washington probably would have lost anyway, but when it came out over the weekend that they were losing their run stopping defensive tackle.
- [17:38]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [17:39]
Bill Simmons
You can kind of pass the point of no return and it felt like they're secondary. I just didn't trust the people they had that poor Benford got two concussions and a week.
- [17:47]
Cousin Sal
It looks like you and I haven't mentioned Christian Benford or the Ron Payne ever. All over 23 weeks. Yes. No. Ever. Yes, you're right. And those arguably were the two biggest, you know, one, you know, neither. Both for not being able to play and yeah. Benford actually got out with second concussion, we think.
- [18:07]
Bill Simmons
And it was like the first series.
- [18:09]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Yeah.
- [18:10]
Bill Simmons
But you have these things where you, you've already decided mentally where you're going in a game and it's already like if you're taking Washington, it's a pretty flimsy case. It's like they're not going to turn the ball over. Jaden Daniels is going to go up a level. He's going to be able to match Philly and Hertz is going to kind of suck. Like that was the case. The other case was Philly's going to run all over them. Washington's luck going to run out turnovers and Philly's going to blow them out. Could see the two cases, it was like, ah, I like the Washington case more. So I took that one. And then you find out their run stuffer's done when I didn't really like the run defense to begin with. And it's like a 15 yard difference.
- [18:45]
Cousin Sal
When he's out and when he's in.
- [18:46]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, it's like, ugh, this isn't a great sign. But yeah, I mean, we'll talk about that game later. But Philly was also great. The Buffalo thing, this might have been their best chance because I, I'll say this, I still think Baltimore might have been the best team from a talent standpoint. And I watched in this game, I guarantee like ra. The Ravens. The Ravens fan watching this game today. You had to. Yeah, I was texting Mallory about it and she's like, still sick.
- [19:12]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, she's.
- [19:13]
Bill Simmons
Because you watch what was working against the Chiefs. The Ravens were better at pounding the ball, running the ball, being physical, and they had a better defense than the Bills. And I'm sure they felt like shit. If we just gotten in there, we could have beaten that team. But they didn't.
- [19:25]
Cousin Sal
We, I mean, we talked about last week how important. So stupid. But how important turnovers are. And we'll get to it in the Philly game, which absolutely dominated the discussion but yeah, if the Ravens don't turn the ball over, it's a different story altogether. And maybe if they get a home game too, against Buffalo.
- [19:42]
Bill Simmons
But does it seem like football is just now about the turnover battle? Who wins how you did on 4th and 1 and 4th and 2 because there's so many of them now and the variance of those is huge. And did you just avoid having a massive fuck up?
- [19:59]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [19:59]
Bill Simmons
And it seems like in a game like this in Buffalo all season was kind of pulling off games like this and their luck finally ran out today. And I know the Buffalo fans last week were pissed because everyone was dwelling on how Baltimore blew the game. And they're like, well, we also won the game. We didn't mess up. We didn't make mistakes this game. They made some mistakes. Yeah.
- [20:17]
Cousin Sal
Well, that's why I took the Chiefs. I'm not going to take a lap because I recognize, like, whoever has the ball last pretty much went. The last six minutes are going to decide this game. But when I was thinking about it, I'm like, wait a minute. I'm going to go against the Chiefs, who, like I said, haven't turned the ball over since November and they're trying to repeat and they're an arrowhead and they have a chip on their shoulder against Buffalo, who beat them in the regular season, like, no fricking way. It's a point and a half. That's stupid.
- [20:39]
Bill Simmons
The line was too low. I. I think if it was Chiefs by three, it was a different thought process. But the one and a half, how can you not. We did. We did this last year. You had the Ravens too, last year, right?
- [20:51]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [20:51]
Bill Simmons
In the AFC title game. And that. That was my never again moment. I was just like, as long as.
- [20:56]
Cousin Sal
There'S three and a half.
- [20:57]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah. As long as the Chiefs are the Chiefs, it's just not worth it. Cause they're going to figure this out year after year. So on the plus side, for Allen, before we get to some of the negative stuff, that pass he threw to Matt Collins before halftime was fantastic. I don't. The list of QBs who can hit that one with the speed and the accuracy that he hit is not. It's basically him and Drake maybe.
- [21:27]
Cousin Sal
Oh, him and. Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah. I lost consciousness for a second there. That was serious.
- [21:32]
Bill Simmons
That was a joke. It was him, Drake, May, a couple others, but he hit that one. He also had that big drive to, you know, give them the lead in the third quarter. He had the other comeback drive when it was 29, 22. He brought them down again and they scored. And I was thinking, like. Cause I don't. I don't. I don't blame this loss on Allen in any respect. He's in that zone now that I'm not sure you want to be in as a great athlete. And I would call it the Tommy Hearns zone.
- [22:03]
Cousin Sal
Ooh.
- [22:04]
Bill Simmons
Where you're awesome, you're memorable, you're a generational talent, and yet you're the other guy in the sports movie over and over again. And how do you. How do you get out of that? How do you snap out of that? Hearns was in all these great sports moments and he lost most of them, but he was still great. Like, he's like one of the best boxers I've ever seen in my life. He was a one on one nobody like him. Six foot one, 147. It's pretty good. Crazy punchy power. He fought everybody. And yet his legacy was like, he lost the Leonard fight, he lost the hagger fight.
- [22:38]
Cousin Sal
So how is he different from Lamar then in that respect? Because they're pointing the same fingers. Right.
- [22:43]
Bill Simmons
I think Lamar is a little bit of a different case because he's kind of come up short in these big moments. Alan's had these moments like in the.
- [22:52]
Cousin Sal
The Roberto Duran, who's. Lamar Drake May.
- [23:00]
Bill Simmons
No, that's a two Is Lamar. I feel like Lamar's story hasn't. I. I want to. I'll answer that next year. Not quite ready to next year. Label him. I want to see one more.
- [23:12]
Cousin Sal
Write this down.
- [23:12]
Bill Simmons
Well, what's tougher? Like, what boxer didn't come through every time it mattered is a. I don't know. I don't know who that is. But no, I. The point with Josh is like they've lost games where he was really good in the game. I thought he was really good in the game today. Yeah, you know, I don't. If you're a Bills fan, you're like, man, Josh has to do more. That's not why he lost.
- [23:34]
Cousin Sal
No, there's a bunch of.
- [23:34]
Bill Simmons
I thought the play calling was atrocious. Sometimes I thought the oc, um, I just don't understand some of those third and short, fourth and short. It felt like anytime they play action, they had guys all over the place. Um, so I would be more mad about that if I were them.
- [23:48]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I think they. The Bills fans, at least early on I could see they're very upset with the coaching staff, you know. Cause when you can't blame the kicker, when you can't kill the kicker and they can't. It goes right to the quarterback or coaching staff. And it seems like the coaches are getting. We should real quick shout out to James Cook. I mean, that was a spectacular, spectacular play on 4th and 2, by the way. Good, good job. Another great play by Josh Allen. Flipping that to him on the quarterback.
- [24:12]
Bill Simmons
Option with some speed.
- [24:13]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [24:14]
Bill Simmons
Sometimes that the toss is too soft.
- [24:16]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [24:16]
Bill Simmons
That one kind of whipped it to the point that Cook might. I like, whatever. But.
- [24:20]
Cousin Sal
But it kind of had to get there then, right? Yeah. And for him to be able to stay horizontally and bridge on his hand and without the elbow falling and extended over the goal line with the other hand was really one of the better plays I've seen all year.
- [24:34]
Bill Simmons
We've had a real resurgence with good running backs. This position that everybody thought didn't matter and then you look around, it's like Barkley and Jameer Gibbs and Cook and going down the line, it seems like it's more important than it used to be. Back to the Allen Tommy Hearns thing for a second. The sad shot at the end when the team's running out the clock. And then cut to the guy losing QB on the. Just sitting on the bench with that deer in the headlights look. That's a tough one. You don't want that to be legacy. In a weird way, from a career move standpoint, I actually think he gains human interest stature because now he's come so close a few and he just can't get over this. Like, next year's Chiefs Bills game is even more interesting. This year's game was so interesting. Kyle Brandt did a Rocky Four Mountain parody with him as Sly and Mahomes as Drago and I don't even know what next year's version of that is.
- [25:31]
Cousin Sal
Right. Oh, maybe it's Clubber Lang than Lamar. No, no. Lang won a title.
- [25:37]
Bill Simmons
No.
- [25:38]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [25:39]
Bill Simmons
I don't know who Lamar.
- [25:40]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I don't know what you do with Josh Allen. That sucks with the cutaways. You need more cutaways of his fiance. Right. I mean, that's. I mean, he's losing that battle too. Taylor Swift, so. But yeah, he. He's playing as. As well as he can and just can't. Can't beat this thing.
- [25:54]
Bill Simmons
Well, and then there's the Buffalo piece of it too. Right. So even. It's always lingering with the Bills game. Like even it's 29, 28. They had just scored a touchdown. They have all this momentum and there's Bass and I'm. And I'm sitting there going, I've watched Bass miss this. Like I. You're watching the pat intently. It's like it's the Bills. I've seen Bass miss this. I'm not positive this is going through. I'm thinking about Casey minus one and a half, minus one and he made it. But the baggage of the Bills is, is another thing. This is. There's some franchises like the Lions, that playoff loss they had two weeks ago or last week.
- [26:33]
Cousin Sal
Last week.
- [26:33]
Bill Simmons
It was last week. Yeah. It feels like January has been 75 days. That playoff loss they had, they haven't had a lot of those because they're never in the playoffs. Meanwhile, the Bills have had, it feels like 100 of these.
- [26:46]
Cousin Sal
They're racking them up. They gotta get this game at home. I don't know, maybe with Pete Carroll in the division, the AFC west and some of these, the team's getting better. You know, the chiefs won't go 15 and 2 or 15 and one going into the last week.
- [26:59]
Bill Simmons
That's a hard ass though, Sal. I know because you have, you look around the AFC and there's just a bunch of teams that feel like they're poised to maybe jump up a level or teams that had bad luck in 24. Like what are the Texans going to look like next year? You know, even in their own division? What. Could the jets be better next year if they, if Aaron Glenn turns out to be a good coach? Could the Patriots be next year's Washington? Keeping my fingers crossed. Could the Chargers make a jump up? Could the Broncos, like you go on down and it's just, I don't. I think the AFC is just going.
- [27:31]
Cousin Sal
To be better next year and I.
- [27:32]
Bill Simmons
Can'T wait to pick all the over unders correctly with you again.
- [27:34]
Cousin Sal
You're going to, you're going to do.
- [27:35]
Bill Simmons
A job though last year.
- [27:36]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, you did. But the Chiefs, as I run that my mouth on this whole thing, they went through the whole thing on the road too last year. So I don't even know what matters.
- [27:46]
Bill Simmons
Well, you know, they lose Rasheed Rice before the season. He's just a non factor. This guy who seemed like he was going to be Mahomes, his number one target, they're able to patch together. Smith Schuster was so bad in the preseason for the Pats, it was like, how are we? Can anyone take this guy from us? And then he's making big plays today. Hopkins, who really didn't do that much today. Kelsey, who looked like he was 55. But then worthy becomes the key guy, this number one pick that they really shrewdly traded up for their drafts. The way that they've nailed the drafts. This is the difference between them and what happened in the second part of the Pat's dynasty with. In the late 2010s when they just started missing drafts. The Chiefs are getting Carlaftis, they're getting McDuffie, they're getting Worthy over and over again. They're nailing guys who are like, playing big roles in these playoff games. And that's how the Pats. That's why it ended.
- [28:40]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [28:40]
Bill Simmons
Seven, the 16, 17, 18 drafts, they just weren't getting people. And that was it.
- [28:45]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Thank God. I will say, the one thing we skipped over with Kelsey, like, that's another thing. The Bills would be like, oh, my God, we held that guy to nothing. He had 14 straight games with 75 or more. 14 straight playoff games. He was invisible. Two catches for 19 yards, and they embarrassed him most of the game and still couldn't get it done. It's a lot of. Lot of rough moments there for the Bills.
- [29:10]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. They felt what was their rushing passing. So they did. They ran the ball 32 times.
- [29:20]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, 32 to 22, I think.
- [29:23]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, 30. They ran 32.
- [29:25]
Cousin Sal
Oh, 32.
- [29:26]
Bill Simmons
34 attempts, 34 passes, 32 carries.
- [29:29]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [29:30]
Bill Simmons
And the Chiefs were 35 carries, 26 passes. This a really. Did people look at this box score, like, 75 years from now, assuming the earth hasn't melted yet, and be like, whoa, that game, that seemed pretty close, right?
- [29:43]
Cousin Sal
Travis Kelsey. What he did nothing. What did the Bills win by?
- [29:47]
Bill Simmons
Oh, well, then Hollywood Brown had that huge brain fart on the. On the play when he was open and didn't realize he was standing out of bounds.
- [29:53]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [29:54]
Bill Simmons
That's another thing with the Chiefs. Holly Brown was supposed to be their big right. You know that this big guy that helped them out.
- [30:00]
Cousin Sal
And yeah, he plants his right foot directly out of bounds on a ball that was. It should have been catchable.
- [30:06]
Bill Simmons
They keep finding little things around the fringes. Like the kick returner made a couple big plays today. You know, these guys, they are always able to locate them. And it's a really. It's its own skill because that's the biggest way you can lose.
- [30:23]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Pacheco and Kelsey, 43 total yards. Like, how much would we pull back on our Chiefs bet if we had known that was going to happen?
- [30:31]
Bill Simmons
Well, don't you think part of it is everybody and their brother had the Kelsey over?
- [30:35]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, that is part of it.
- [30:36]
Bill Simmons
I think that was. That And Dallas Goddard were the. Dallas Goddard hit his. But those two seemed like they were the.
- [30:42]
Cousin Sal
They gave everyone free Barkley money and then they're like no, no, we gotta figure something out.
- [30:46]
Bill Simmons
So one other thing with. So we'll be talking about the Chiefs going for the three peat and I was going through looking who's three peated in the last 50 years which is half a century. That's a long time. Jordan's Bulls twice. The Shakobe lakers, the late 90s Yankees, the Canadiens four in a row in the 70s and then the Islanders four in a row in the 80s. And that's really it Unless you want to count the Comets in the first four years of wnba. This three peat thing especially in the age of parody. The Pats never did it.
- [31:21]
Cousin Sal
I can't believe the Pats ever did it. I mean I looked through it too. Obviously they haven't.
- [31:25]
Bill Simmons
And the Steelers it was the Eagles game.
- [31:27]
Cousin Sal
And the Niners it was the Nick.
- [31:28]
Bill Simmons
Falls Doug Peterson game.
- [31:30]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. But out of Cowboys, Steelers, Patriots, Niners, it's shocking that there was no three peat and shocking that the Bears only won one.
- [31:38]
Bill Simmons
We didn't do a three peat in a game where Brady threw for over 500 yards. Yeah, like think about that. That was how we didn't get it. But this is fucking hard. And you have these games where it's like they tipped our pass to the wide open guy on a fourth down. We missed the two point where the guy was. His foot was out of bounds. We missed the field goal at the end of the first half. We needed those. There's so many things to get that right for three years in a row feels in a league with a salary cap feels impossible.
- [32:05]
Cousin Sal
Do you really?
- [32:05]
Bill Simmons
Mahomes is great but it's not like Mahomes was like, you know, throw everyone on my back. I'm going to carry us all through the season. I don't even think he was one of the three best QBs this year.
- [32:15]
Cousin Sal
Howmes they were 15 and 2. They were 15 and 1 heading into the week that they sat everyone and he wasn't even a top three or four consideration for mvp. That's. That's insane because his stats weren't Patrick Mahomes esque is is the problem. But as like a Patriot fan and one of the few teams that have had two Petes. How much are you rooting for? It's not like 72 dolphins are. Are thrilled and do the champagne toast when. When the team loses. But are you rooting hard? Because I've talked To some people who have been part of like a 2 Pete and are rooting hard against anyone having a 3 peat.
- [32:51]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, it's an interesting one. Like, my dad really doesn't like when the Chiefs do well because he wants the Pats to be better historically than the Chiefs. My thing is, like, whatever the Pats did, that's what they did. The Chiefs belong to this different generation. And I, you know, like, if the Chiefs win three in a row, it doesn't diminish what the Pats did. But I think other Pats fans are like, really need the Chiefs to lose. Need the Bills to come through. It depends on your perspective on it. Yeah, I personally was more. I'm probably leaning more toward. It would be cool if the Bills never won and we were like the last good AFC east team, but I'm more spiteful.
- [33:27]
Cousin Sal
Oh, wow. Yeah, that's pretty specific. Yeah.
- [33:31]
Bill Simmons
But if the Bills never get one and then now, now with Rabel and drake may and 130 million in cap space and whoever, we get number four and some street and all of a sudden we can like, try to take the AFCs from them. I'm in that mindset.
- [33:43]
Cousin Sal
But you're. You're trading that for Mahomes could eventually pass Brady as the greatest ever in every conversation. You're. You're willing to put that up for debate.
- [33:52]
Bill Simmons
He. So much is left for him to do that. Brady won seven. Brady beat Mahomes twice. Brady had the Atlanta game, which is the greatest feat probably any quarterbacks pulled off in a game. I. It's. There's a long way to go in there.
- [34:06]
Cousin Sal
If he's four in a row. If he. Four Petes.
- [34:08]
Bill Simmons
Yeah.
- [34:08]
Cousin Sal
Which, you know, he's a game and a season away from doing. Then. Then the conversation becomes real. I don't know.
- [34:15]
Bill Simmons
I'm with you. The Bill Simmons podcast, brought to you by FanDuel. Every pass, every play, every prop, it's Super Bowl 59. All of it is happening on FanDuel. You can bet on America's number one game with America's number one sportsbook any single way you want. Spreads. Live bets over unders, player props, special props. So much more. We will be doing our special super bowl prop episode with cousin Sal on the Sunday before the super bowl. So get ready for that. You can make the super bowl even sweeter. New customers can score 200 bucks. When you make your first bet. Just place a $5 bet and if you win, you'll get 200 bonus bets. Download the app or head to FanDuel.com BS and bet with FanDuel official partner Super Bowl 59 must be 21 plus in President select states or 18 plus in President DC first online real money wager only $5 first deposit required bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bench would expire seven days after receipt restrictions. Buy seat terms at sportsbook.fandor.com gambling problem call Win 800, Gambler or visit rg-help.com this episode is brought to you by LinkedIn. In basketball, a blockbuster trade can make or break your playoff run. Before the deadline, GMs across the league scour for the right data and insights, hoping their moves pay off. February 6th trade deadline this year by the way, just like in basketball, growing your small business in 20 all comes down to how well you can build your team. That starts with better insights from LinkedIn with unique skills and interests to the connections you have in common. LinkedIn has the strongest hiring data and insights to help you identify the right professionals so you can make the best hiring decisions. LinkedIn pairs you with the high quality candidates you need to make your business grow and flourish. LinkedIn also lets you go beyond candidates who are actively applying in a given week. 171 million LinkedIn members aren't actively seeking jobs, but they are open to new opportunities. Who isn't? That's a big pool of people you don't want to miss out on. And who knows, one of them could be your next All Star player. So hire smarter in the new year. Find your next Great hire on LinkedIn. Post your job for free at LinkedIn.com Simmons Once again, LinkedIn.com Simmons to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply. Eagles Washington Seems like so long ago I wrote down Daniels kept trying to throw on a Superman cape and his teammates kept pulling it off. That's my, that's my half of my take of the game. The other take is the Eagles are really talented and just had more talent all over the place and actually played really well. I thought Hertz was good. They used A.J. brown correctly. Barkley was incredible. Their defense made a couple, you know we cut those yet another punch fumble play a couple stops when they needed it. There's a different version of this game without a couple of the turnovers that I think would have been really fun to watch if it was the Washington with with in a score with 10 minutes left with the ball but instead it became a an absolute blowout. I I don't feel terrible about picking Washington but you knew in the first quarter it was a bad pick.
- [37:27]
Cousin Sal
Well except for that first drive. They did everything you could ask for him, Right. So I wrote for Washington. My big thing was Philly's going to run the ball. When Duron Payne went out, I'm like, this is going to be a disaster. And especially because Washington is one time possession. The last two times, I think it was 34, 26 against last week against the Lions and 36, 24 against Tampa. Maybe I mixed those two up. But, Mike, they're not going to win that. They're not going to win. Time in possession, it was dead even. I was a little bit wrong about that because it was dead even time of possession. But that first drive, you must have been excited. When he's converting fourth and twos and fourth threes, then we sell 14 points. That sucked. But I also don't know why they went for a field goal like they. They were surviving fourth and threes all the way down the field, and they have a shady kicker.
- [38:11]
Bill Simmons
So, yeah, it was like Dan Quinn ran out of plays. I was really surprised they went for it. I know the book probably said it was a wash. Take the points, all that stuff. But I. The longer they're on the field, the longer the Eagles offense isn't on the field.
- [38:23]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [38:24]
Bill Simmons
I wouldn't.
- [38:24]
Cousin Sal
Barkley crushes their spirit.
- [38:26]
Bill Simmons
Three plays later, so Barkley gets it. Diami Brown has the punch. Fumble. Eagles score again. Washington's about to punt. I thought it was the most obvious. I swear I'm not just saying this. I was watching the line because I was like, this is the most obvious fake punt situation I've ever seen. Because they know if they're punting it back and I'm watching, and I was watching the whole play develop, and I'm like, oh, they're doing it like, as it was happening. And the Eagles were completely blindsided, which I didn't really understand. But then they end up settling for.
- [38:58]
Cousin Sal
I thought they were.
- [38:58]
Bill Simmons
They were. They only had one guy to cover two guys.
- [39:00]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, but. So, oh, man, it was such a good throw. I think it was like. Because it was like two tight ends, like, going out and he had to judge the way the middle linebacker and he just shifted towards the guy on the right and then he completed. And it was a good throw and everything else. But, yeah, they should have been a little more prepared. But kudos to them. They only got three out of that. Right? That made it 14 6.
- [39:21]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, yeah, I wrote down. It was 14 6, Washington and run 30 plays, and Philly had won seven and Washington was losing by eight. But. And then Elliot missed the field goal, right? McLaurin scores and it's 1412 and Washington goes for two, which I didn't understand at all. Even though, like I don't understand how you're not going for the fourth and three.
- [39:42]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, right.
- [39:42]
Bill Simmons
But then you're going for the two. It's second quarter. Who cares if it's 1413. So they don't get that. And then you start doing the math. 14:12, oh, this is going to be a two score game soon. And then Philly made a couple big plays. Like A.J. brown had that big 4th and 5 catch. I thought Hertz was good. Like if, if Hertz had shown what he showed today in previous games, I probably would have taken Philly, but I didn't. We hadn't seen it for sure.
- [40:08]
Cousin Sal
I mean, we saw how successful he is with this team in the playoffs when he throws for 130 and 140, 150. And this one, this is the anomaly or I don't know, the outlier game because what did he throw for this he threw for.
- [40:20]
Bill Simmons
It was over 200, 246. Yeah, and a couple big runs too.
- [40:25]
Cousin Sal
Running for three touchdowns. So yeah, I was like with that, with that field goal miss, I was like, you're playing right into Washington sands. Like I feel like with this team on third and sixth, they should run every time on third and six or third and five, they're going to go for it on fourth and one or two and make it instead third and six. The one thing he can't do is get sacked and he did. And then what's his name misses the field goal. And that was. And that was. I was like, all right, they're back in it. But yeah, it was just too much, too much firepower.
- [40:52]
Bill Simmons
Eventually 20 and 12, under two minutes left and the guy fumbles the kickoff and gives Philly the ball back. Now it's 27:12, it's 20:12 minute 44. I feel like that could have gone down, gotten a field goal and it's 2015 halftime, right?
- [41:05]
Cousin Sal
They take.
- [41:06]
Bill Simmons
Instead it's 2715 halftime. And then Philly gets the ball and they stop him top of the third quarter, but then just kind of flamed out. They got the three and out and then Philly got the touchdown. That was that. And then right when it seemed like Philly might or Washington might be able to drive down and get the, the super fun cover echor fumbled, right? And that was that. I thought Daniels was a winner in the game regardless. I thought He. He was really, really good. And a couple of. The fact that they put that team together with duct tape kind of got exposed in three. Great, great season for them, though.
- [41:47]
Cousin Sal
It's such a tough spot. Right. A rookie just can't just, especially in Philly, to go to Detroit and Philly and do that and.
- [41:55]
Bill Simmons
Well, the trends were.
- [41:56]
Cousin Sal
Linemen.
- [41:57]
Bill Simmons
Four straight. Four straight road games.
- [41:59]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [42:00]
Bill Simmons
They lose their best guard and they lose their run stuff are going into Philly. And yet I kind of needed to see it from Philly. I wasn't positive they had it, like, just in general, like, I, you know, were they going to do weird shit?
- [42:13]
Cousin Sal
Well, Hertz was good, but then you hear about him showing up in a knee brace, and I started getting PTSD from the Tyson Paul fight. I'm like, oh, Tyson showed up with a knee brace and I lost a lot of money. I don't know. Maybe this isn't a good idea.
- [42:24]
Bill Simmons
Well, then they have this weird center situation where one guy's got the knee brace and the other guy has a bad back and.
- [42:30]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [42:31]
Bill Simmons
And Brady kept talking about it because I think he, you know, he's. He knows how important the center is because he played qb. That never really mattered.
- [42:38]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. The tush push and everything. I hate that we have to say tush push. My God.
- [42:44]
Bill Simmons
So do we need to ban this play? Like, is it. Or is it just not going to be until somebody breaks their back in a tush push and then they're like, we have to stop this. Somebody was seriously hurt.
- [42:56]
Cousin Sal
So I want to know what year they brought it back because it was banned. Right. You couldn't pull a guy. You still can't pull a guy right forward, even though they don't call it a lot. And you. There was a time when you couldn't push it, so you couldn't push. So I don't know. It doesn't jive with the current rules about, like, all right, we don't want guys hitting each other's heads in the wedge. And we want safety.
- [43:19]
Bill Simmons
We care about physical safety.
- [43:20]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Also, it doesn't look like a football play, and it's boring. And. And then they have a little problem on their hand with what Washington was doing. I think the whole world that wasn't rooting for Phil was like, good, keep hitting them. Keep hitting them. Keep getting the personal foul. And then the ref admonished them and was like, we're gonna. We're gonna spank you. There's gonna be a spanking that goes on here if you do it. Again, we're gonna give them a touchdown, so. So you give them the touchdown so we don't have to give them a touchdown. It's so weird.
- [43:45]
Bill Simmons
So would you get rid of it? Because, like, Buffalo tried a couple times and it didn't work.
- [43:49]
Cousin Sal
I'm the wrong guy to ask. I hate it.
- [43:52]
Bill Simmons
I don't like it either.
- [43:53]
Cousin Sal
The team I hate most uses it most effectively and. But I don't like it.
- [44:00]
Bill Simmons
So someone's going to have to get.
- [44:02]
Cousin Sal
Hurt, though, I think. I think that's the problem with this.
- [44:04]
Bill Simmons
Right. Eagles big picture. Do you feel better about them than you did a week ago, or do you feel like Washington out kicked its coverage and gave a valiant underdog effort? But this is what happens. This is the March Madness team that made the Final Four. Now they're playing UNLV in 1990, and it's Larry Johnson and Stacy Ogman, and they're going, oh, all right, this is running out now.
- [44:29]
Cousin Sal
I like that you're such a college basketball fan. I think it's a little. It's a little of both. Definitely. Washington, the Cinderella thing, it came to an end. But I do feel pretty good about Philadelphia in the trenches there, so. And they could, you know, I'm not saying I'm taking Philly, but they could present problems like Tampa Bay did to Kansas City in that super bowl where Mahomes is just running for his life. And there'll be one highlight where he's horizontal to the ground completing a pass, but otherwise it's a long night. So they were. They were excellent. I mean, what. They have 229 on the. They average like 6.4 carry.
- [45:05]
Bill Simmons
Well, Saquon, who's. If they win the Super Bowl, I think will go down as the most popular Philly athlete. Just moving into that, basically taking the Bryce Harper spot. But in the pantheon of, like, guys that the Philly fans Love, he was 15 for 118 and three TDs today. The touchdown was spectacular. The first one last week he was 26 for 205. So in the two games, he's 41 for three, 23 with five touchdowns. And it's like, you remember in the late 90s when Terrell Davis was just ripping off, like, these crazy post seasons, like, the stats, you go back and you look, you're like, holy shit. That's why I made the hall of Fame for those two years. And this feels like a very. Terrell Davis.
- [45:49]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, you should start saluting. And the question you posed earlier, did he do a good deed for all Running backs or just for himself and Derrick Henry? I mean it's, it's going to a tough decision for GMs the rest of the way, but he did make a difference. I mean the Eagles are much better because they got Barkley and he only had like you said, 15 carries. Like that's bizarre. They could add another hundred yards if he had another 10 his rookie season.
- [46:16]
Bill Simmons
I think I said to you on this podcast that I thought he was the best running back I've ever seen. And we fought about it and then it became a clip that got. No, we just argued about it. I was like, this is the best running back I've ever seen. Um, I'll, I'll send out the. It's somewhere on Twitter. Um, and we cut a social clip about it. And then when he hurt his knee and then he was in the Giants and it became one of those like, oh my God, that was one of my worst takes. But now I think, I think I'm back. I'm back in it with the take. Like what running backs that you've seen in your life? I guess the one thing with him, the past catching, like he even dropped the one today. The pass catching's a little iffy with him. I still have Peyton as the best running back I've ever seen.
- [46:58]
Cousin Sal
Only Barry Sanders, Peyton, and for a small stretch, Terrell Davis like you brought up. I don't, I don't really.
- [47:05]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, Terrell Davis is in there. I still think for one game, Emmett is. Has to be discussed seriously. If it's like 22 degrees outside and I need a running back who will rush the ball 35 times today. Who's your pick? I'd probably take Emmett, so I guess it would depend. Terrell is still the most dominant running back on a good team I've seen. Just felt like it was six yards every time. Peyton was the best all around. Just special running back. But Barkley's. Wait, it's, it's, it's a little video game ish with him.
- [47:38]
Cousin Sal
This is a crazy year. Like this is. You know, I know they're not going to give him MVP, but 2000 plus. Is he going to get 2000 in the playoffs also? I don't know.
- [47:47]
Bill Simmons
Could he get to 2,500 for the regular season, playoffs combined?
- [47:51]
Cousin Sal
Oh, I think so. Yeah. That's in there, right?
- [47:53]
Bill Simmons
Well, no, it'd be. He, he needs like 150 and what's.
- [47:57]
Cousin Sal
Interesting is he gets screwed because of the, the one yard plunge by Jalen Hurts, right? He had three of those. Otherwise, like, Barkley would probably have like 30 touchdowns.
- [48:07]
Bill Simmons
Oh, shit, I forgot that they played. What did he have in the Green Bay game? Oh, 25 for 1. 19. Yeah. So he's. So he's been over a hundred in the three games, so. Yeah, even the two, two or three.
- [48:18]
Cousin Sal
Before that, the last regular season games, he was spectacular.
- [48:21]
Bill Simmons
So he'll get over 2,500 combined.
- [48:23]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [48:23]
Bill Simmons
So who's your number one running back ever? Is it TD?
- [48:26]
Cousin Sal
Well, I don't know. I mean, just from what I've seen, I think we missed a lot of Walter Payton's greatness. Right. But I'll trust it. And if we want to keep going back to.
- [48:35]
Bill Simmons
I mean, he wasn't on. I promise you, he wasn't on on the east coast more than twice a year for his entire prime. But you always knew he. The clips are amazing. The NFL film stuff was amazing. And then the way everyone talked about how he's the best blocking running back ever, he's the best pass cut, like he checked all these boxes that he threw. Nobody in that era was like that. Tomlinson hit some of that stuff too, but I was. Yeah, the Peyton stuff is the most fun NFL films to me, other than Barry Sanders, for sure.
- [49:04]
Cousin Sal
I. But like, short yardage is so important now. I would say Davis and Barkley over like a Barry Sanders, but Barry Sanders is spectacular in his own right too, so.
- [49:16]
Bill Simmons
Well, my, my Barry Sanders take. I've done this before, but my Barry Sanders take is probably in your wheelhouse. Yeah, I. I'm like in the. Probably the minority, but I would rather have Emma Smith than Barry Sanders. Yeah, I'd rather have the 4, 5, 6 yards of pop than the guy who every once in a while can run for 70. But what. But was always looking to break the big play. I've. I've had a million arguments.
- [49:37]
Cousin Sal
Oh, I would used to get him fistfights over this when I love Emmett more than Barry Sanders. And I don't think anyone has as many negative carries for negative yards as Barry Sanders. But I mean, you just go by SportsCenter. Highlights were so important back then, you know.
- [49:53]
Bill Simmons
So we have Jalen Hurts in the second super bowl, which is twice as many appearances as Matt Stafford, Drew Brees, Dan Marino, Aaron Rodgers.
- [50:11]
Cousin Sal
Wow.
- [50:14]
Bill Simmons
We have Nick Sirianni in the super bowl where it looked like he was going to get fired in September and early October. And since then, I think they've lost once against Andy Reid, who is now 28 and 16 in the playoffs in his sixth Super bowl and starting to really legitimately breathe down Belichick's neck. And his breath smells like barbecue. This episode is brought to you by Pepcid Complete. We all know that one of the best parts of game day is the food. On Sundays, nephew Kyle comes over. Sometimes we'll get healthy. We'll get some salads. Sometimes we'll get a little ambitious. We'll get some sandwiches. It's always the best part of my food week. Well, until heartburn strikes. Then it's not as great. You get heartburn from time to time. Gotta watch out. You don't want to be rolling around in bed all night. Thankfully, Pepcid Complete starts to work instantly. It lasts all day. Just one great tasting chewable tablet provides dual action heartburn relief with an antacid that starts working instantly and an acid reducer that lasts all day. So you can stay focused on that second sandwich, that second second helping. A salad, not heartburn. Visit Pepcid.com to shop now all day based on eight hour symptom relief studies during the day. Use product only as directed. This episode is brought to you by Nissan. When you're younger, you're more spontaneous. You say, screw it. I'm just going to drive cross country with my buddy and we'll stop at a bunch of places and take pictures. You get older, you would never do something like that. Keep your spontaneity, my friends. Fuel your inner adventure with the first ever Nissan Rogue Rock Creek. From rocky trails to snowy roads, there are plenty of places to show off this suv thanks to its intelligent all wheel drive. Its adventure ready design gives it a rugged flair that stands out off road adventure calls to the first ever Nissan Rogue Rock Creek. Visit NissanUSA.com to learn more. Intelligent all wheel drive cannot prevent collisions or provide enhanced traction in all conditions. Always monitor traffic and weather conditions. Let's do Guess the Lines because Guess the Lines is brought to you by hooka and Bandai 9, their new daily trainer. Bandai 9. What was your favorite? Bandai?
- [52:34]
Cousin Sal
I like 7. I thought it jumped the shark around after that.
- [52:38]
Bill Simmons
Now it's back. Bandai9 is the best one they've had. Guess the lines. You already won. You won your first title. I got to say my team has noticed a lot of talk with this win and now we're rededicated for next season.
- [52:53]
Cousin Sal
Oh, I made a nice little breakout clip of it and yeah, I don't know what the NFL could do.
- [52:57]
Bill Simmons
I won like 10 years in a row and I just sheepishly accepted my trophy and just Kept my head down.
- [53:02]
Cousin Sal
That was your fault. My fans shouldn't have done that.
- [53:04]
Bill Simmons
And you won once and you're talking a lot of shit. So next year it's on, baby.
- [53:08]
Cousin Sal
Big freaking deal. And I don't know that, like I said, the NFL has a problem because now this is a waste of a week. I don't know what they could do scheduling wise to make this interesting with me having won the title, but.
- [53:18]
Bill Simmons
Well, you know what's really annoying? The NBA, I agree. Has their trade deadline the Thursday of Super bowl week.
- [53:26]
Cousin Sal
Oh, really?
- [53:26]
Bill Simmons
When? It should either be this week or next week. Like just for content. The NBA just shoots themselves in the foot over and over again. I've never seen anything like it.
- [53:35]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [53:36]
Bill Simmons
Why would you have your trade deadline during super bowl week? It's so fucking stupid.
- [53:39]
Cousin Sal
Are they announcing it in the park parking lot of media day? Like, how close are they getting? How much attention do they need?
- [53:46]
Bill Simmons
I don't understand it. Like by Thursday, everyone is either at the super bowl or talking about the Super Bowl. I just don't get it. I don't understand how they screwed shit like this. It doesn't matter. You think Jimmy Butler's going to the Dodgers? Yeah, they get everybody guess. The Lions, Chiefs, Eagles. And I'm going to say in New Orleans, I'm going to say Chiefs by two and a half.
- [54:16]
Cousin Sal
Okay, I said I've not seen it yet. Swear. I've said it has to be one and a half because every line has been one and a half this year. And I'm going to say Chiefs are favored. And so now let's look.
- [54:30]
Bill Simmons
I pulled out my starters. By the way, Joe Milton made that guess.
- [54:33]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, well, you should have. It is one and a half. Of course, the biggest practical joke in sports gambling.
- [54:40]
Bill Simmons
Chiefs of start. Why did the football scores get so weird? How did we never had 29 versus 2029, 29 in the fourth quarter never happened our entire childhood. Like, everything's weird. The lines are weird, everything's weird.
- [54:55]
Cousin Sal
And not only that, I was like, oh, 29, 29. All right, the one and a half isn't going to come into play. And then like we, you, me and Hench, we listed like 10 ways the 1 1/2 can come into play. Oh, the Bills can miss the extra. Oh, the Chiefs could go for two and mitt like, oh, yeah, I forgot it's the NFL one and a half.
- [55:12]
Bill Simmons
That's it for guess the line. That's not it for the Bondi 9, which delivers peak plushness for everyday miles overhauled from top to bottom, they've increased the stack height and added a new premium foam midsole to deliver that soft, resilient ride that's become synonymous with the Bondi. Everybody. Bondi. Visit hooka.com, h o k a.com to learn more about the Bandai Nine.
- [55:35]
Cousin Sal
Wow, they got everything up already.
- [55:36]
Bill Simmons
What's everything up? Let's talk about it.
- [55:38]
Cousin Sal
Barkley over, under. Our. Y'all, let's.
- [55:41]
Bill Simmons
Let's do a quick tour. You want to guess that for our fans on YouTube? Yeah, on the YouTubes. Barkley over, under. Can I guess something?
- [55:49]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, do it.
- [55:50]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Barkley over, under. I'm gonna say 85 and a half.
- [55:55]
Cousin Sal
No, one. 14 and a half.
- [55:59]
Bill Simmons
What?
- [56:00]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, he's crazy. You just read his stats. They can't give that free money.
- [56:03]
Bill Simmons
He's playing the Chiefs.
- [56:06]
Cousin Sal
Cook almost had that, right.
- [56:08]
Bill Simmons
What did James Cook have today?
- [56:11]
Cousin Sal
I don't even know. It was 70. 70, 80 somewhere in there. What else do you want to see?
- [56:17]
Bill Simmons
James Cook had 85 yards.
- [56:20]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [56:21]
Bill Simmons
Why was that a bad guess? 114 is hard for the Super Bowl. That means you're probably winning if you rush for 114.
- [56:28]
Cousin Sal
They can't give him 15. They can't give him the ball.
- [56:30]
Bill Simmons
15 plus, the Chiefs can kind of try to jam the line and make him sort of Devontae Smith. I dare you. I'm betting the under. Okay. Do they have Mahomes? They do rushing attempts yet? Cause that's my favorite bet.
- [56:44]
Cousin Sal
Oh, okay. You gotta be careful.
- [56:46]
Bill Simmons
He had 11 rushes today. That. That bet hits every single time. Mahomes of the playoffs, rushing attempts is the safest prop in sports.
- [56:55]
Cousin Sal
I'm not seeing rush attempts yet. Oh, wait. Oh, I. Yeah, I do see it. Okay. What do you think?
- [57:03]
Bill Simmons
I think they jack it up to like five and a half. Cause it keeps hitting.
- [57:06]
Cousin Sal
Oh, they jacked it even further. Six and a half.
- [57:10]
Bill Simmons
I still like it.
- [57:10]
Cousin Sal
The over's a plus. But we like this bet more than Mahomes rushing yards. Right. Because of the nail down factor. He takes jack.
- [57:17]
Bill Simmons
The nail down factor kills the rushing yard thing. They got to figure that out.
- [57:20]
Cousin Sal
But you get three free.
- [57:21]
Bill Simmons
We didn't talk about that moment today when the official was slapping the. Slapping the Washington with the newspaper because they kept jumping off sides. And he's like, if this happens one more time. I did say, yeah, we're awarding a score to Philadelphia. So what? What would have happened from a gambling standpoint? Who gets the score?
- [57:42]
Cousin Sal
Oh, right, right, right. We were trying to figure that Out.
- [57:44]
Bill Simmons
Is there a way we could have bet on this? Somebody like, could we bet on this at the Super Bowl? Philly? No. No player on Philly scores a touchdown.
- [57:51]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. The scolding score.
- [57:53]
Bill Simmons
Does the center.
- [57:54]
Cousin Sal
The center get it? I'm not sure. That's. That's good. Cause it's like an own goal kind of, right?
- [57:59]
Bill Simmons
I. Have you ever seen a ref say that before? I didn't know that was.
- [58:02]
Cousin Sal
Not even close.
- [58:02]
Bill Simmons
I feel like they made that up. Yeah.
- [58:04]
Cousin Sal
It's not a lot of brotherly love being sent that way. One other play. Was that the measurement. And again, the Chiefs won because they're better and everything else. The measurement on that fourth down where the. The line judges the two refs. Yeah. Wildly different. And they just don't measure anymore. They don't take those chains. They're embarrassed of the chains. Like, why don't they measure? So, like, they guessed, and then that guess has to be conclusively overruled to change. Like, measure it. Put it down. First of all, there's not a chance.
- [58:35]
Bill Simmons
I think the ball wasn't hitting the hash mark, and the chain was actually on the hash mark. So they knew it just missed it.
- [58:43]
Cousin Sal
Interesting. All right. This is a $500 billion league. Put a fricking chip in the ball. Like, it's one thing if the guy's knee is down, but if we're really just measuring to see where the ball furthest the ball got, I think we could do that.
- [58:54]
Bill Simmons
Wow. You're a Put a chip in the ball guy.
- [58:56]
Cousin Sal
Well, what. What are we doing? The chains.
- [58:58]
Bill Simmons
Do you get along with the. Make the goalpost hires guys. Do you guys have gangs together or you're like, rival gangs?
- [59:04]
Cousin Sal
There's a big meeting. It's also an AA meeting, so. Yeah, it's bringing chains out there. Like, these guys are surveyors in the 1650s. So stupid.
- [59:14]
Bill Simmons
So what do we have for the over under? Can I guess that one?
- [59:18]
Cousin Sal
Oh, yeah. Well, sure. That's easy. That's right there. I mean, not easy.
- [59:21]
Bill Simmons
49 and a half.
- [59:24]
Cousin Sal
Now I lost it. 49 and a half is exactly right. You know what? I'll give you a win for this week. I'll give you that win for that.
- [59:30]
Bill Simmons
I got one.
- [59:31]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [59:31]
Bill Simmons
So the two games today went crazy. Over.
- [59:33]
Cousin Sal
Oh, yeah.
- [59:35]
Bill Simmons
I mean, by over. By 15, 20 points. Usually. There was a lot of dialogue about, well, Eagles, Washington, each team only gets seven possessions. There'll be these slow games, like, nope, that's wrong. And then KC Buffalo just. They kept moving the ball down the field.
- [59:50]
Cousin Sal
And last week, was it the over 4 0? No Chiefs, Texans went under, but we had Eagles, Rams had 50, Bills, Ravens at 52 and the Lions commanders had 76. So, yeah, you had like five out of the last six go over in cold weather most of those games.
- [60:05]
Bill Simmons
So for a Super bowl rematch, there's not a lot of those either. Pat's Giants was probably the most famous one of this century, but we've had some other ones when we were growing up, Steelers, Cowboys was like an exciting rematch, I think. I get the feeling people now don't like rematches as much. Like the Casey Philly, we've already done this. And the Jalen Hurts thing, people like to complain better than Mahomes thing. Yeah. Like Buffalo or Washington being in there would have been content fodder.
- [60:33]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [60:34]
Bill Simmons
But I think this is a really good game.
- [60:35]
Cousin Sal
It's great. And first of all, Fox is delighted. The NFL's delighted, right? Cause you got Hurts, you got Barkley, you got Mahomes, you got Taylor, everything. If the Rizzler shows up again, I don't know. But I think the casual fan probably is bummed about this matchup a little bit.
- [60:52]
Bill Simmons
No question.
- [60:52]
Cousin Sal
Like, I think, like, maybe Cowboys, Chiefs would bum them out a little more. But other than that, I think this is right up there.
- [60:59]
Bill Simmons
My son, who follows football on TikTok and through YouTube shorts, he watched most of the second half with me, and at one point he turned to me and said, dad, isn't every football season the same? Like, the Bills come super close and then they lose. The Chiefs make the super bowl, they play somebody from the other team, it seems good. Then the Chiefs win. And I was like, nope, you're wrong.
- [61:22]
Cousin Sal
I'm going to lie to you right now. No. The answer is no.
- [61:26]
Bill Simmons
That's not true at all. Son. Every season's way different.
- [61:33]
Cousin Sal
There's no chip in the ball. Of course it's the same.
- [61:36]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. No. Jaden Daniels. You never know, son.
- [61:39]
Cousin Sal
Right?
- [61:40]
Bill Simmons
Jaden Daniels. Last week in Detroit, he shocked the world, son.
- [61:43]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. McDermott's not going to blow this game. Well, you could just tell him that every year he could rely on a great AFC title match, right? Like, seven of the last nine have been seven points or decided by seven points or fewer.
- [61:57]
Bill Simmons
My son. I always impress my son by predicting what plays are going to happen. I've been playing a lot of Madden lately. I'm like, oh, empty back. I think he's going to. And half the time, that's how predictable. Some of these plays are, though. I think it's actually a bad sign if I'm on my couch and I could figure out where the ball's going half the time. Like the, the. Especially on those like swing screen passes you can kind of see. Do you do that when you're watching the games? Do you try to predict what they're going to do? Sure, yeah.
- [62:24]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Everyone wants to be like Romo in that regard.
- [62:26]
Bill Simmons
I just can't when I. Romo doesn't do it anymore.
- [62:30]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I think he's, you know, I don't know because people are assholes and they're like, we don't want to hear what's about to happen, so stop circling the screen. I think, I don't think he was told to stop, but I think he's.
- [62:40]
Bill Simmons
Just like, forget the one I got wrong. I would have bet my life on it was before the Samuel touchdown when Buffalo tied it.
- [62:46]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [62:46]
Bill Simmons
It's like third in goal from the five. I would have bet my life that Allen was going to do the QB draw on that one.
- [62:51]
Cousin Sal
Take off. Yeah.
- [62:52]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. I just think it's. It's been so obvious. They've been. They've been relying on it to the point that I think they even. They realize they probably can't do it. I.
- [63:00]
Cousin Sal
Can I ask you when the shotgun from the one started?
- [63:04]
Bill Simmons
Well, listen, you know, that's my, you know, my least favorite plays are 4th and goal or 4th and 4th and short. 4th and 1. The QB not over the center. To me you're like just throwing away an advantage.
- [63:15]
Cousin Sal
Who started it? Did it start in college? Was it like Vince Young or like Tebow? Like it wasn't that long ago. I mean it wasn't, you know, it wasn't like in the 70s or 80s. I really feel like it's this.
- [63:27]
Bill Simmons
It's the cousin of. It's a tie NBA game with under 10 seconds left and they do the ISO where then the guy does a step back three to win the game. But it was a tie game. It's like we just need a basket.
- [63:39]
Cousin Sal
Doesn't need it.
- [63:40]
Bill Simmons
You don't need to do your step back. 27 footer. Yeah. Same thing for the shotgun snap. I don't understand it. I don't. I also don't understand why Mahomes doesn't sneak, which we always talk about.
- [63:50]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [63:50]
Bill Simmons
Because he got hurt that one time like five years ago. Like they can't sneak him anymore. They can't. He can't just like lean down and burrow in and go for half a yard.
- [64:00]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Although I'll say that fourth and two, where they rushed up to the line after a timeout and he rolled right. It's like, wow, this guy's got it, man. This is why it's so freaking hard to beat them.
- [64:12]
Bill Simmons
It's really impressive. We have two weeks to talk about the super bowl on your podcast. On my podcast. People are going to be in New Orleans. Whole bunch of things. You have a new Cowboys coach.
- [64:26]
Cousin Sal
Oh, we could skip. We can go right to Parent Corner, right? We don't have to talk about this.
- [64:30]
Bill Simmons
You hired Marty Schottenheimer's son, Brian.
- [64:33]
Cousin Sal
They are related. I had a feeling. Yeah.
- [64:36]
Bill Simmons
I wouldn't say Brian was a red hot coaching candidate, which might be a good thing or a bad thing. He's the kind of guy I would have expected. Oh. The Patriots have hired Brian Schottenheimer as the QB coach for Drake May. I'd be like, good hire veteran. He's your head coach.
- [64:52]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [64:52]
Bill Simmons
I don't understand it. Why didn't you hire Cliff Kingsbury at least? He's, like, from Texas and he's young and you could make excuses for the first job. It's like, maybe he didn't get along with Kyler Murray. I don't understand Brian Schneider at all.
- [65:05]
Cousin Sal
I don't, I don't understand it either. And nothing against the guy. I'll, I'll give him a chance. I hope he does well. But I really think Jerry Jones is fucking with us. I mean, the way he's even introduced him, he's like, ah, he was known as a career assistant. It's like, yes.
- [65:18]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, great, Jerry.
- [65:19]
Cousin Sal
That's what we're.
- [65:19]
Bill Simmons
Career assistant.
- [65:20]
Cousin Sal
That's what he said. That's how he's not just Brian anymore. He's the head coach. I'm like, you just don't care about us. You don't care about this team. This is just a joke. Um, I, I, I kind of want to add Enter the fan trans. You know, the portal. I really want to get the, into the portal and pick a different.
- [65:37]
Bill Simmons
Like, no, look at the Washington fans this year. You got to keep. You got to stay with your. Stay with the marriage.
- [65:43]
Cousin Sal
Joe House.
- [65:44]
Bill Simmons
Stay with your bad, unhappy marriage.
- [65:46]
Cousin Sal
Hate. Watch the. The Washington team until they switched ownership, and now he gets a seat in the luxury box courtesy of Washington. I'm like, all right, I'll do that. Like, why can't I just watch from afar? This is disgusting. Brian Schottenheimer, like you said, wasn't on anybody's list. It's like in fantasy, if you're doing, like a snake draft, and someone drafts, like, in the seventh round drafts, like. Like Ray. Ray McLeod. And you're like, all right, wait, hold on. I'm still looking down my list to cross, right?
- [66:14]
Bill Simmons
You're making the joke.
- [66:15]
Cousin Sal
Hold on.
- [66:15]
Bill Simmons
I got to get to page 12.
- [66:16]
Cousin Sal
Keep going. Got to keep going. Like, there's something to be said about at least going through the motions and interviewing a Kellen Moore.
- [66:22]
Bill Simmons
Or is Jones broke? What's like, is it possible he doesn't have as much money anymore?
- [66:27]
Cousin Sal
Because why he doesn't want.
- [66:28]
Bill Simmons
He paid Mike McCarthy to the last minute of the contract and then just let it expire. And then he's obviously trying to save money with this coaching hire. Really weird. He's a. There are better people. There are better versions of this guy out there. Maybe the Landman thing, he.
- [66:44]
Cousin Sal
I think he said that he's like, I'm an actor. I can fall back on that if the team's bad. And the team will be bad. So that's just. Well, nonsense.
- [66:53]
Bill Simmons
It was an interesting one because the jets interviewed, I think, 230 possibilities for their head coach, and I don't even think he cracked that list. And they were interviewing people that you didn't even know were still, you know, professionally working. Yeah, he's our guy.
- [67:08]
Cousin Sal
He's been in the building three years, and they still have to interview him. The fact. The funny part is that they actually interviewed him. Like, yeah, I think you know what you're getting with him. It's fine. But I'm.
- [67:19]
Bill Simmons
So does the interview start like, brian, what went wrong with your career?
- [67:23]
Cousin Sal
Why are you still here?
- [67:24]
Bill Simmons
Brian, why did it peak five years ago? Conversely, I'm on an absolute high with the Patriots again. Frable's putting together this awesome coaching staff that's like the complete opposite of what we had last year. We have all these overqual. Like, we have Doug Marone. Doug Marone almost beat the Pats in a Round three playoff game five years ago. He was good head coach. I'm really pumped. I really feel like. I think the Washington thing has given all the Pats fans so much energy that it's like, they did this in a year. They just. They hit the quarterback. They did all that. So now I'm. I'm going to be more into this NFL draft than I was last year.
- [68:05]
Cousin Sal
It's so funny how Washington has affected other teams near the bottom right. And the exact opposite effect on Dallas. Cause now we have Jaden Daniels in our division for anywhere from next year to the next 12 years. Right. And, and we celebrate.
- [68:20]
Bill Simmons
He even took a win today. I felt like I thought he was, you know, he, he maybe a couple passes were a little low but for the most part like his poise and the way he kind of kept them at that two point conversion he had was great. I just thought he still so much fun watching.
- [68:35]
Cousin Sal
Very cool. It's very cool. Never freaks out. Threw a couple bad passes. But it's to be expected. I mean how many, how many weeks are you going to do this for?
- [68:43]
Bill Simmons
Well the cool thing for us selfishly just like for the Sundays where we're trying to watch all these games at once, we just want as many fun QBs as we can get. And now it seems like at least May and Daniels are two more to the list. Hopefully Caleb can get there. Hopefully Herbert will take some sort of leap. Hopefully the new Jacksonville coach will resuscitate Lawrence. We might get into a situation where half of the teams have a fun QB.
- [69:13]
Cousin Sal
Wouldn't that be something? Yeah, I think.
- [69:15]
Bill Simmons
What if JJ McCarthy's good fun, fun.
- [69:18]
Cousin Sal
QBs and Dax coming back and bad coaches. Shut up. Are what's going to keep guest of lines going for another 17 years.
- [69:26]
Bill Simmons
Well, the one thing we know is we're always going to have bad owners and bad coaches. By the way, the Celtics, here's a little tidbit. The Celtics, they have. It was the first round of the buyers that they had to cut down all the prospective buyers. And I don't know, five people made the first round. Four or five people. One of the people was the Eagles owner, really Jeffrey Lurie, who's apparently from Massachusetts. So he was. Because there's been a couple like I wonder who these guys are. And there was a couple I couldn't figure out. But that's one that.
- [70:06]
Cousin Sal
Do you like that in the mix? I mean that happened with your Red Sox too, right. Isn't there like a whole.
- [70:11]
Bill Simmons
So the precedent is Josh Harris owned the, owned the Sixers and then bought Washington's football team. The Kronkies owned the Nuggets and they own the Rams. So there's been a couple of NBA NFL things. But I mean I always thought the Eagles were one of the best run football teams. Right. So if, if, if he bought the Celtics, that's a decent outcome. There's a couple decent outcomes in this.
- [70:34]
Cousin Sal
It's so funny how there's only like a few owners, there's only a few quarterbacks to get and there's only a few coaches and if you don't get them. You're kind of screwed.
- [70:42]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, and you're way more likely to have a mediocre to bad coach and a bad owner. All right, anything else before we hit Parent Corner? Are you. Did you hit the sad point of this season yet? Where. Oh yeah, you're just going to like wrestling tournaments on a Saturday and thinking about how you have no games on a Saturday.
- [70:58]
Cousin Sal
That is pretty sad. I told you, when you can't make three team teaser unless you use the over under. That is a. That.
- [71:04]
Bill Simmons
That's a milestone official sadness day.
- [71:07]
Cousin Sal
Really bad. Really sad. And after next week after we do our prop podcast, that'll be sad too. It's a. It's. It's a step. What are you gonna do?
- [71:20]
Bill Simmons
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- [72:56]
Cousin Sal
All right, I'll go first. Speaking of wrestling tournaments. So yeah, wrestling season's coming to a Merciful end for me. And so that's my middle kid, and my youngest kid has travel baseball and rec league basketball. So Saturday I have to go from Jackson.
- [73:12]
Bill Simmons
Rec league basketball.
- [73:13]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, yeah. Oh, he's all over basketball, too. It's fun. It is fun at that age, running around. So Saturday I have to go from Jack's tournament to Harrison's basketball game. I'm about. I'm going to catch just the end of his basketball game. So I walk in there, it's the fourth quarter, and I see my wife there. And the game, it's 18, 17. And she's talking to this woman seated next to her, and I have no idea who the woman is. And I mentioned that. I was like, wow, the gym seems tense. And my wife's like, yeah, the refs aren't calling anything. These kids are really going at it. And then she goes back to talking to this woman that I don't know. So. And then it's clear to me. I'm like, well, she must be guessing that the refs aren't calling anything because she's not watching a second of this. And so I'm starting to get annoyed. I'm like, it's 18, 17 with, like, two and a half minutes left. Like, Harrison's taking shots and he's playing defense and everything. But anyway, okay, so she's still talking as a woman. There's eight seconds left. We're up by three. The opponent inbounds. It dribbles down the court, runs down the court, and just before he pulls up for the three, Harrison hard fouls him before he goes into shooting motion. And I was like, that's fricking smart. That's like, one of the smartest things.
- [74:23]
Bill Simmons
The announcers must have loved it.
- [74:25]
Cousin Sal
The announcers loved it. The gym did not love it. The referees didn't love it either. And everyone's like, oh, oh, boy. But now there's like 0.6 on the.
- [74:34]
Bill Simmons
What was the hard foul? Was it like a shove or was it like a karate chop?
- [74:37]
Cousin Sal
Right, right. Shove to the chest, maybe a little elbow. Kids balance.
- [74:41]
Bill Simmons
This is great.
- [74:42]
Cousin Sal
Before. Before. Way before the shot. Definitely before the shot. But he saw that the kid was about to pull up, and there's 06 on the clock, and there's like, no, it's not a shooting foul, and they're just going to inbound it. And the ref, like, mildly scolds Harrison, much like the refs did to. To. Sorry, who played Philly today or already lost Washington when they were jumping off the sides over and over. But he's like, game's over. And. And so that was it. And everyone's like, oh man. Oh boy. All right. So I was like, oh geez. Like I can't wait to high five him in private later.
- [75:18]
Bill Simmons
Like, like a small fist pump.
- [75:20]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. And then the kid who he shoved is like crying after the game. And I say, and I'm like, now I'm by my wife and this woman. I'm like, oh God, look at this, this kid's crying now. And she turns to me and mouths, that's. That's this woman's son. His name is Bob. I'll say Bob cause I don't want to say the real name. But that's off by one letter. She's like, that's Bob and this woman's son. I'm like, oh shit. Now she's looking at me. And so now I have to eat shit a little bit. Like I let like a minute pass and I go up to her after the game and I'm like, hey, I just want, you know, Bob played a great game. And she's giving me a look like, yeah, I fucking saw you walk in like with four minutes left in the game. Don't give me this crap. You didn't even see him play.
- [76:03]
Bill Simmons
Oh, you made it worse.
- [76:04]
Cousin Sal
I made it worse? She didn't say that, but she gave me that look. But anyway, talking to Harrison afterwards, I'm like, look, you know you're not supposed to films like, dad, we lost a game like that last week. I wasn't gonna let him get the shot off. That's my boy.
- [76:18]
Bill Simmons
That's good hard nosed stuff. I like it.
- [76:20]
Cousin Sal
That's it. So I'm the jerk again, you know, I.
- [76:27]
Bill Simmons
So 10 and 11. Harrison's 11?
- [76:30]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [76:31]
Bill Simmons
Those are really emotional ages for boys sports. There's a lot more crying than I was ever prepared for. Like in the baseball and the basketball, like kids really melt down.
- [76:43]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [76:44]
Bill Simmons
It made me think how funny it would be if like we did this as adults. Like if it was like in the game today, like Dalton Kincaid drops the pass. He's just sobbing on the sidelines. When do they grow out of that? At age 12, we do like gamblers.
- [76:58]
Cousin Sal
Well, what's interesting with basketball from 10 to 11, which makes it even more intense, at 11 they start, they start calling double dribble a lot. And they start calling travel and they. And you could play backcourt defense. So it gets pretty rough and stupid. Um, yeah, 10, 10 and under. You couldn't play defense until like Crossed half court.
- [77:18]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Cause I. I was visiting our cousin Jimmy yesterday.
- [77:21]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [77:22]
Bill Simmons
In South Bay, and I called you to see if you were around. And I just heard whistles in the background. And I'm like, oh, I forgot. On Saturday you just drive around a different.
- [77:33]
Cousin Sal
My son gets sporting events. Yeah, that was it.
- [77:37]
Bill Simmons
My Parent Corner. So my wife went away for a couple of days with some friends. She still lives here. It's not a Michelle Obama thing. And I was left alone with. With me and Ben and the dog Murph, who, if you've noticed, has not been really on Parent Corner.
- [77:55]
Cousin Sal
Oh, yeah.
- [77:56]
Bill Simmons
All year. Because he's four. Like, he really is blossomed into a great dog. Mature. No accidents. We have no gates in any of the rooms in the house, Anything like that.
- [78:08]
Cousin Sal
Well.
- [78:10]
Bill Simmons
My son had had a friend over and they made a cake, and it was a female friend. And he left the. You know, there's the frosting left. I think he left the frosting on the counter. But maybe not enough distance for Murph not to get it. So I come home on Thursday, and in the TV room, there's just the remnants of something. And it's like, it almost looks like somebody spilled cocaine powder. And I'm like, what is it? I'm smelling it, and it just smells like icing. And I'm like, oh, my God, Ben. So now I'm on Murph watch. Nothing's happening. Nothing's happening. And then Saturday morning, the apocalypse. I noticed him sneak away a couple times. Usually he's always where I am if I'm home. And I noticed him sneak away a couple times. Like, that's where. Murph, where are you going? He's like, I'll be right back. It was a poop ocalypse. My office that I'm in right now, multiple shits.
- [79:18]
Cousin Sal
I could smell it.
- [79:19]
Bill Simmons
Our living room, which we had a gate so that nobody could go in there. That was a dog for months and months. And finally, like, we don't need the gate. It's ugly. Murph never goes in there. Double shit on the rug in there. Where was the other place? Oh, and then the TV room. Like, ruin the rug. Like, so, like, three different shits. And I had already closed the doors. So anyway, we have this machine that I would recommend. Anybody has a dog who likes to shit in their house. This water tank machine where you can scrub it and it picks the shit up. And I saved two of the rugs, but I haven't saved the third one. And he ruined it. And so last night I was like, so I didn't have a good night's sleep. Friday night, I'm like, last night, I'm like, hopefully this shit's done. I lock all the doors. He's locked in in our bedroom. There's no rug for him to pee on. The bathroom door is closed or poop on. Bathroom door's closed. There's nothing he can get to. And I'm like, now I can just get a good night's sleep. We got the pod tonight with the two games. I just want to be rested and prepared. Fall asleep at 1:00. Like 2:45. I just hear him circling around in the room, which means he has to go. So bring him down. It's pouring rain. Goes out, he does whatever comes back. Towel him off. Hour and a half later, we Repeat it again. 5:45. Let's do it a third time. And now I'm up. And I've been up since 5:45, so I don't know what I look like, but three shits. And I haven't told my wife because she's away. And so I guess this is. If she hears this, this is how she's going to.
- [80:58]
Cousin Sal
I was just gonna ask. So who will get in person? Well, did you reprimand your son or.
- [81:04]
Bill Simmons
No. Oh, he's like, it wasn't my fault. He shouldn't have jumped on the counter. I'm like, no, it's 100% your fault. If you leave something on the counter that. Like, if you left poison on the counter and he ate it and he died, is that his fault or yours? He's a dog. He has an IQ of 20. So I've been mad at him all weekend, right? And just like. Like, I. I've never picked up this many shit. So it was like he had never shit in the house. And then it was like a year and a half of shit saved up.
- [81:31]
Cousin Sal
Jesus.
- [81:31]
Bill Simmons
Just dropping them everywhere. So anyway, Murph's back.
- [81:34]
Cousin Sal
What would the. What they make a wedding cake? What the fuck? How much ice did he.
- [81:39]
Bill Simmons
I don't understand. Then I was like, do I have taken to the vet today?
- [81:42]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [81:43]
Bill Simmons
And I'm like, I'm not fudgeing. Taking the vet. The games are about to come on. If he dies, he dies. I was like, rock. It was like, drago, get some Creed does. But it was just. And I actually felt bad for him. Cause last night I was like, I'm not even bringing in. Just stay outside for two hours. And then I kind of forgot about him. I was watching a movie for rewatchables, and then I remember I heard him barking. I came back down, I brought him in, and he was, like, so emotionally destroyed. He's like, you left me out there. I didn't think you were going to come get me. So anyway, it's been a roller coaster weekend, and I've had, I think, three hours. Wow.
- [82:19]
Cousin Sal
Can I say something?
- [82:20]
Bill Simmons
You said, the lesson is don't get a dog.
- [82:22]
Cousin Sal
No. Yeah. Wait on the dog. Or at least get that rug cleaner. For sure. You said the dogs have an IQ of 20. This. This sounds like a smart dog. Like, when you say, like, the dog left the room to do all this. He knew. He knew. Like, that makes me think sometimes that dogs are smarter than humans. Like, he had the wherewithal to be crafty enough or embarrassed enough or whatever it was to do it in another room for.
- [82:45]
Bill Simmons
It's almost like a cheating spouse where it's like, I'll be right back. I just got to go to the bathroom. And then they're on a phone call.
- [82:51]
Cousin Sal
I thought you said she went away with her friends. Oh, the dog, the dog, the dog. Yeah.
- [82:56]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. No, he's. He's like, I'll be right back. Just gonna go get some water. And it's like. He's like, what?
- [83:01]
Cousin Sal
Rogue.
- [83:01]
Bill Simmons
I haven't had shit on yet. So anyway, I'm looking at our chat. What are they saying, people? Chris Shemmer says, I love how Bill still contends he's never done blow. I have never done cocaine. I swear on my kids. I'm not even positive I've been in the same room with it. Like, very virginal with cocaine. I'm not going to ask you if you've done it.
- [83:25]
Cousin Sal
I've not done it. And I had the opportunity because I had gambling money once to loan my roommates who were dealing it money. It's like, you give me $150 and you can make 600 by the end of. I was like, I don't even. I. I don't know why I said.
- [83:40]
Bill Simmons
No, but I started good.
- [83:42]
Cousin Sal
I wasn't even doing that. No.
- [83:43]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. So anyway, Murph. Murph ruined my weekend.
- [83:46]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [83:46]
Bill Simmons
And it looked like the two bets were going to ruin my weekend. And then the Chiefs came through, which brings us full circle.
- [83:52]
Cousin Sal
There we go.
- [83:52]
Bill Simmons
Can always count on the Kansas City Chiefs to save your weekend, especially when they're the second team. I thought Romo was outstanding today. I want to mention that as well.
- [84:00]
Cousin Sal
Really good.
- [84:01]
Bill Simmons
I really thought he did a great job. Romo we were in rough shape with him a couple years ago. It just didn't seem like he was putting in the work, but it feels like he is.
- [84:08]
Cousin Sal
Well, I like it because even week a little tiny bit wishy washy. I was like, oh, man, is he just not a cold weather announcer? But no, he came back. I think he did cocaine. I think it was.
- [84:19]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. That's it for. That's it for Parent Corner. That's it. So next time I see you will be next Sunday. We're going to be doing our annual super bowl props podcast.
- [84:33]
Cousin Sal
I love that there's like 150 up already. It's not even Monday. This is terrific. We always used to have to wait right until the second week.
- [84:41]
Bill Simmons
I have a quick NBA thing for you. You know we had that Pacers bet. Oh, yeah.
- [84:48]
Cousin Sal
Tell everybody what that is. Tell me.
- [84:50]
Bill Simmons
No, we did. Well, it's Pacers over, Minnesota under, Sacramento under. We did like four weeks ago and now it seems like Sacramento might screw us because we need them to be under 42 ends. I think the Pacers are about to make a little run here. Just talking about from a gambling standpoint next couple of weeks. I. I like what I'm. They have other guys back. I just think there's something interesting about them that I've been monitoring.
- [85:14]
Cousin Sal
What did we get?
- [85:15]
Bill Simmons
I love the teams in each conference. That's. And I think Golden State's on the flip side. I think. Did you see the stack? Golden State is 1 in 20 after the third quarter when they don't have a lead. Like to me, Golden State, if they don't make a trade like this. Is this a punt? Yeah.
- [85:30]
Cousin Sal
What did, what did we get the Pacers at?
- [85:32]
Bill Simmons
Oh, we're going to hit that one. We got it at like 40. 41 and a half.
- [85:37]
Cousin Sal
Okay, so it's. It's 46 and a half. But you wouldn't double back on it, would you? That's too much.
- [85:42]
Bill Simmons
Oh, for regular season wins. Yeah. What's their record?
- [85:48]
Cousin Sal
Does it matter? Yeah, no, I don't know the record.
- [85:52]
Bill Simmons
So they are 25 and 20. So 47. They'd have to go 22 to 22 and 15. 22 and 15.
- [86:04]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [86:05]
Bill Simmons
That's pretty good.
- [86:07]
Cousin Sal
That seems like it comes out to the last week.
- [86:09]
Bill Simmons
Yeah, they said, well, we already have that then.
- [86:11]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Yeah. I was just wondering. I mean, so I don't even know how you play them at this point.
- [86:16]
Bill Simmons
What more 46 and a half's high, so we definitely hit that one. Golden State is 41 and a half now. And unless they do a desperation trade, that one might be going under. The only other one that I think. I can't believe I'm saying this, but the Lakers look good in that Celtic game.
- [86:35]
Cousin Sal
I know.
- [86:36]
Bill Simmons
And then they look good against the Warriors. And I'm starting to wonder if maybe they found a little something because there's a physicality to them. I wrote them off. I thought they should have traded Anthony Davis. And it's only two games. I'm not zigzagging, but I'm just watching them because I saw a team in that Boston game in person that just seemed like they had. They were figuring out an identity that I didn't think they had. And then they did the same thing. It's Golden State. This was a tough, physical team.
- [87:02]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Like they, they three of the last four. The next four games or they're in that four game run that where it was going to be tough. And I bet them to make the play in. I'm like, oh, they're definitely going to get in the play. And because you could do that on fandom, like now they're minus.
- [87:15]
Bill Simmons
You think they can actually make it?
- [87:16]
Cousin Sal
Well, now they're minus 225 to make the, to make the playoffs.
- [87:19]
Bill Simmons
So yeah, there's seven games over.500. And I wasn't even considering them potentially being good until those last two games because they're defending way better than they did. They have, they, they have enough shooters now. Gabe Vincent's given them something that he was not giving earlier in the season. So I, it's. I, I don't want to put. Plant a flag on it yet, but I'm, I might have been wrong about them.
- [87:46]
Cousin Sal
Well, I thought for sure once they let Bronnie go to the G League, I'm like, that's a mistake they're going to regret. Sending that generational talent somewhere else and who knows if he even comes back if they want him.
- [87:58]
Bill Simmons
No, Bronnie's the best thing that happens to going to Laker games now because people want to, they want to see him. But usually the game's over.
- [88:04]
Cousin Sal
Right.
- [88:04]
Bill Simmons
So we, I took Hench to the Laker game. We got out of there. We were out of the garage in like 30 seconds because every, it was like the easiest time to. Yeah, everyone's lakers are up 20. Usually people are fleeing, but everybody kind of wanted to stick around.
- [88:16]
Cousin Sal
Nice. Everyone just wanted Hench to leave, I think.
- [88:21]
Bill Simmons
Oh, he was in rare form. Yeah. The only other one is Cleveland. I was thinking about this for next year, that team that starts out super hot.
- [88:31]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, they're ridiculous.
- [88:32]
Bill Simmons
And then around the 40 game mark, they're huge favorites in every game, but they. They relax a little bit and they lose a couple. And I want to remember that for.
- [88:41]
Cousin Sal
Next year, Atkinson is minus 470 for coach of the year. What would they have to. What kind of. What kind of claps would they have to have for him not to win it at this point?
- [88:51]
Bill Simmons
Wow. What's crazy is the Thunder coach is 30 to 1 and that guy's doing an amazing job. He lost Holmgren for the whole season, basically.
- [88:59]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, but he won. He won last year, though, right? I mean, I'm all for the guys that get votes, but I think that's. I don't think they give it two years in a row too much.
- [89:07]
Bill Simmons
Joker at plus 230 for MVP on FanDuel. Seems like really good odds. As you know, I'm not allowed to.
- [89:14]
Cousin Sal
All right, you promised me you'll get the vote. Give the vote.
- [89:17]
Bill Simmons
No, but I'll tell you, here's why. Because first of all, it's only game 45. Second of all, there's really only two candidates right now. But Denver's a four seed now. Like, you can't win the MVP unless. Unless it's either a shitty year or you're like a top three team. They're probably going to be a top three team in the west, which puts him in play and he's having this historic offensive season. It's at least an argument.
- [89:40]
Cousin Sal
So that's the hedge on Shay because I have SGA because of you, the house and Rosillo. I got like plus 350. Now he's minus three 50. Oh.
- [89:49]
Bill Simmons
When we were. We were telling people early that. Yeah, yeah. If you're just talking value.
- [89:54]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, I.
- [89:55]
Bill Simmons
It's a two person race.
- [89:56]
Cousin Sal
No one else.
- [89:57]
Bill Simmons
I would be really surprised. Tatum. Oh, man.
- [90:00]
Cousin Sal
I mean, Giannis is 120.
- [90:02]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. Everybody's triple figures. Anybody else? No, it's those two. So if you wanted to hedge it, I would hedge it with Jokic. The rookie of the year is funny because all of a sudden wear on. Miami became the favorite because it was good for two weeks. That's how bad. I still think Castle plus 310 is probably a little.
- [90:22]
Cousin Sal
I have SAR from the beginning of that year.
- [90:25]
Bill Simmons
Yeah. And then most improved. That one always changes. Right around mid February, all of a sudden people get excited. Same for defensive player of the year. I think six man's a little more open than Pritchard being minus 170 because he hasn't been like just looking at those odds. Amen. Thompson, who's been incredible, especially lately, he's eight to one.
- [90:45]
Cousin Sal
Yeah.
- [90:46]
Bill Simmons
And he's. He's having a. I think a more impactful year than Pritchard is. Well, the pitcher, you could argue Thompson's the best rocket right now.
- [90:53]
Cousin Sal
I mean, remember Westbrook was a big favorite or not Westbrook, who they make. Was it Westbrook with six. Man, did that make sense like a few years ago. Then like he became it became a starter and then it screwed it up, went away. So that's what you have to avoid, like which one of those top four can be getting the starting lineup.
- [91:10]
Bill Simmons
Cuz, what do you got to plug?
- [91:11]
Cousin Sal
What do I have? Against all odds a couple times this week through the ringer with Tate Frazier, Cousin Sal's winning weekend at the end of the week and Frontier Wireless blows and their customer service reps are fucking liars. That's it. Bye. See you next week.
- [91:29]
Bill Simmons
Are you doing content with Tate this week?
- [91:31]
Cousin Sal
Yeah, yeah, yeah. What do you want me to ask him?
- [91:34]
Bill Simmons
Is he focused yet on Charlotte trading for Curry? That was always his dream scenario.
- [91:40]
Cousin Sal
Ooh, interesting. I don't know. He's all about.
- [91:43]
Bill Simmons
I don't think Golden State's ever trading Curry, but Tate's dream was Golden State was going to become mediocre and at some point the move was just to cash in Curry before, during the last stretch of.
- [91:54]
Cousin Sal
What does that look like?
- [91:55]
Bill Simmons
He goes back to Charlotte first round.
- [91:57]
Cousin Sal
Pick the number one. No, I know, but what do they have to give up?
- [92:00]
Bill Simmons
I think Lamelo's in it.
- [92:02]
Cousin Sal
Yeah. Two guys never want to play. That's what a great trade.
- [92:10]
Bill Simmons
Anyway, ask Tate, see what he thinks.
- [92:11]
Cousin Sal
All right, I will.
- [92:12]
Bill Simmons
All right. Thanks to Kyle and Kahal. Thanks to Saruti. For those not here, you can watch all of our stuff on the on YouTube. Please subscribe for us. And then I got a new rewatch coming tomorrow. So that's five. Sal, congrats on the guest alliance title again. Good job by you. Good job by you, buddy. And good job by the Chiefs. Thanks. Everybody on the wayside must be 21 plus in President select states for Kansas in affiliation with Kansas Star Casino or 18 + in President D.C. gambling problem. Call 100 Gambler or visit rg-help.com call 1-887-897777 or visit ccpg.org chat in Connecticut or visit mdgamblinghelp.org in Maryland. Hope is here. Visit gamblinghelplinema.org or call 800-327-5050 for 24. 7 support in Massachusetts or call 1-87-7-8, Hope NY or text hopeny in New York.