AMY: Feeling Things About Feeling Ugly, Con Artists, and the Episode We Had to Delete

Summary

Podcast Summary: "AMY: Feeling Things About Feeling Ugly, Con Artists, and the Episode We Had to Delete"

Release Date: April 6, 2025
Podcast: The Bobby Bones Show
Hosts: Amy Brown and Kat

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Introduction and Rebranding

In the inaugural episode of their newly branded podcast, "Feeling Things," hosts Amy Brown and Kat embark on a transformative journey from their previous show, "Four Things with Amy Brown." Emphasizing personal growth and emotional acceptance, the duo sets the stage for deep and meaningful conversations about human emotions and relationships.

Amy Brown [01:50]: "Today is episode one of Feeling Things, but it's episode 650 if we were still Four Things. That's crazy."

Navigating Con Artists in Personal Services

A significant portion of the episode delves into the topic of con artists, prompted by Kat's suspicion that Amy might be falling prey to deceptive practices in the beauty industry, specifically regarding face fitness alternatives to Botox. The hosts collaboratively navigate a con artist checklist to evaluate the legitimacy of Amy's experience with an online face fitness course.

Kat [03:40]: "Getting conned by your face fitness person... we're gonna go through a checklist and see."

They assess various red flags such as too-good-to-be-true promises, urgency in purchasing, lack of credible credentials, and exaggerated testimonials. Through this analysis, they conclude that while Amy may not be outright scammed, the time and effort invested are questionable.

Amy Brown [27:25]: "I like to say self-awareness really is knowing that there's so much stuff that you don't know."

Understanding Core Emotions

Transitioning from the con artist discussion, Amy and Kat introduce the concept of core emotions, focusing initially on the feeling of being "ugly." They redefine "ugly" not in terms of physical appearance but as a manifestation of negative self-perception influenced by one's mood.

Amy Brown [12:23]: "Feeling ugly isn't about looks. It's about how we see ourselves when we're down."

Kat expands on this by comparing emotions to dashboard lights in a car—signals that indicate areas needing attention. This analogy underscores the importance of acknowledging and addressing emotions to prevent deeper psychological issues.

Kat [39:38]: "Feelings are very similar to the lights on the dashboard of your car."

Personal Stories and Emotional Healing

The hosts share intimate anecdotes illustrating their personal struggles with loneliness and hurt. Amy recounts her journey of adopting face fitness and the subsequent emotional turmoil, while Kat discusses feelings of loneliness during significant life changes like adopting children and facing marital challenges.

Kat [50:07]: "Feelings are very similar to the lights on the dashboard of your car."

They emphasize the therapeutic value of recognizing and processing emotions, highlighting how vulnerability and open communication can lead to healing and stronger relationships.

Amy Brown [77:06]: "But our friendship is more important to me than the podcast."

Episode Reconciliation and Authenticity

In a candid turn of events, Amy and Kat address a past episode that was deemed problematic and subsequently deleted. They reflect on the challenges of balancing professional boundaries with personal authenticity, especially when transitioning the podcast's focus towards mental health.

Amy Brown [66:31]: "We're a therapy podcast, Ish."

Kat shares her apprehensions about the episode's reception and the emotional impact it had on her, leading to a mutual understanding and commitment to fostering a more authentic and supportive environment.

Kat [71:27]: "This is not a therapy podcast. So whenever you would, like, stop me, I was like, oh, my God, it did something wrong."

Tools for Emotional Intelligence

Towards the end of the episode, Amy and Kat introduce valuable resources such as a feelings wheel and a feelings flowchart designed to help listeners identify and navigate their emotions effectively. They credit these tools to experts like Chip Dodds and emphasize the importance of self-awareness in emotional growth.

Kat [78:36]: "The majority of this comes from this feelings flowchart comes from Chip Dodds, the voice of the heart."

Conclusion and Future Directions

Wrapping up the episode, the hosts invite listeners to engage with upcoming segments, including "Couch Talks," where audience questions will be addressed. They express enthusiasm for future discussions on additional core emotions, promising deeper dives into topics like fear and gladness in subsequent episodes.

Kat [75:50]: "Stay tuned. Coming up next Tuesday."

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Key Takeaways

1. Emotional Acceptance: Embracing and understanding core emotions is essential for personal growth and healthy relationships.
2. Identifying Red Flags: Being aware of potential con artists involves scrutinizing promises, urgency, credentials, and testimonials.
3. Authentic Communication: Open and honest discussions about feelings can lead to healing and stronger interpersonal connections.
4. Tools for Self-Awareness: Utilizing resources like feelings wheels and flowcharts can aid in recognizing and managing emotions effectively.
5. Ongoing Evolution: The podcast "Feeling Things" aims to continue evolving, providing listeners with insightful conversations about mental health and emotional intelligence.

Notable Quotes

• Amy Brown [12:23]: "Feeling ugly isn't about looks. It's about how we see ourselves when we're down."
• Kat [39:38]: "Feelings are very similar to the lights on the dashboard of your car."
• Amy Brown [77:06]: "But our friendship is more important to me than the podcast."
• Kat [78:36]: "The majority of this comes from this feelings flowchart comes from Chip Dodds, the voice of the heart."

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Connect with "Feeling Things" Podcast:

• Website: FeelingThingsPodcast.com
• Social Media: @FeelingsThingsPodcast
• Upcoming Segments: "Couch Talks" every Thursday

Join Amy and Kat as they continue to explore the depths of human emotions, fostering a community of empathy, understanding, and personal growth.

Transcript

[Amy Brown]

If you've listened to the Four Things podcast for a while, you know how important acceptance is when it comes to personal growth. And you know who else is big on acceptance? Discover.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

You see, Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. That's a whole lot of places and a whole lot of acceptance, which is great for Discover, but even better for you. Based on the February 2024 Nielsen report. Learn more at discover.com credit card introducing Instagram teen accounts. A new way to keep your teen safer as they grow. Like making sure they always have their seatbelt on.

[Laura Carenti]

Alright, sweetie pie, buckle up.

[Amy Brown]

Good job.

[Kat]

Or ring the bell on their bike.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, kid, give it a try. Nice. Or remember their elbow pads. Knees too. Okay.

[Kat]

Yep.

[Amy Brown]

There you go. New Instagram teen accounts. Automatic protections for who can contact your teenager and the content they can see.

[Kat]

What's up?

[Laura Carenti]

I'm Laura, host of the podcast Courtside.

[Kat]

With Laura Carrenti, a masterclass case study of the business of women's sports.

[Laura Carenti]

I'll be chatting with leaders like tennis icon Alana Kloss.

[Amy Brown]

I don't do what I do only for women. I do it for everyone.

[Kat]

And I want the whole market and innovators like Jenny Nguyen. I would say 50% of the people that come visit the Sports Bra aren't sports fans. They come to be in community. They come to be part of. Courtside with Laura Carenti is an iHeart women's sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Courtside with Laura carenti on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Amy Brown]

Presented by Elf Beauty, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. 1, 2, 3. Break it down. If you ever have feelings and you just want some, maybe a cat got.

[Kat]

You covered like a.

[Amy Brown]

No, brother.

[Kat]

Ladies and fellas, we just.

[Amy Brown]

From the real stuff to the chill stuff and the in between, sometimes the best thing you can do is just stop and feel things. This is Feeling Things with Amy and Kat. Happy Tuesday. Feeling Things. Formerly, I wanted to say formally Four Things with Amy Brown, because someone. Someone might be tuning in right now and they're like, which tuning in? Is that totally a radio thing, like tuning into the dial. Yes, it is, but someone might be streaming us, downloading us at the moment and listening. And they're like, wait, what is this? What's Feeling Things? Cause I'm just trying to listen to four Things with Amy Brown. But welcome to Feeling Things, which is formerly Four Things with Amy Brown. I'm Amy. I'M Kat, and Today is episode one of Feeling Things, but it's episode 650. If we were still four things, that's crazy. So we could look at it that way, which I don't know how we're really gonna count it. Cause it's on the same feed and we have somewhere between. I thought it was 25 million, but I got an update from our PR person because she was putting together a press release, and it said nearly 27 million downloads. But if you're listening right now and this is episode one of Feeling Things, then it's. And then someone's actually listening. Then we have one download and counting. So we're just excited that you're here. And if you have time, or when you have time, if you can subscribe, follow, leave a review. That is very helpful, especially during this transition, this makeover, this rebrand. And we're going to get into a lot of different things today. One thing specifically that is by request by Kat, which is about con artists. But it's mostly because you think I'm.

[Kat]

Getting conned by your face fitness person.

[Amy Brown]

Right.

[Kat]

We're gonna go through a checklist and see.

[Amy Brown]

It could be true. I. I paid money officially 30 days ago.

[Kat]

And are you getting something out of it? Well, we'll get into it when we get.

[Amy Brown]

When we go to your con artist checklist, I'll tell you kind of an email I got today from them, and I was like, oh, perfect timing. We're also gonna go over core emotions, and today will be part one, because Cat's the therapist here, so she knows the basics. Did you learn the eight core emotions in school or.

[Kat]

No, because there's not like, an actual one. Eight feelings, eight emotions. If you look on the Internet, you're gonna get a million different answers. But there's a couple places that I've found. Well, I use what works for me, that it splits them up into eight, and then there's, like, sub sections. So we're gonna go through all of those.

[Amy Brown]

So eight core emotions coming up. And it may seem a little bit basic, but what's cool about our emotions, which we're going to cover the first four today, and then next Tuesday, we'll do the other four. But feelings can be a gift or they can be an impairment. And so you might be like, oh, I don't need to know the core feelings, or I already know them. Of course, I've heard those before. But you may not know the gift that they give you, and you may not know the impairment that they Give you. So that's really what we're going to be going over, which.

[Kat]

That. I feel like when you learn that, you're more apt to actually feel the uncomfortable stuff because you know that there's a gift in it. And sometimes it just feels like, ugh, this sucks. You know?

[Amy Brown]

Yeah. I mean, and I want the gifts. Like, I'm going to chase the gifts, like, now that I know there's gifts, like, at the end of the tunnel.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

I'm going to be like, okay, let's just feel this faster.

[Kat]

Like last week when you hurt me, that gave me a gift.

[Amy Brown]

Well, I didn't know that I felt hurt.

[Kat]

I felt hurt.

[Amy Brown]

Right?

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And then you were able to share that with me. And hurt is one of the first four that we're gonna go over today, so we'll share that story. And I learned something, too, in that the faster you speak about it, the quicker it gets resolved deep. I mean, quote me. Quote me. Which obviously, that is exactly what happens. But so many times we put things off, or we don't wanna bring it up. Cause we don't wanna be a burden, or we don't wanna seem silly. Or it's like, oh, is it us? Which there was some of it going on with you, and you were willing to address that one on one with your therapist, which I can respect.

[Kat]

I wanted to make sure that it wasn't just my stuff coming up before I brought it up to you, but then we brought it up pretty quickly.

[Amy Brown]

Well, you didn't even need to bring it up to me because I brought.

[Kat]

It up to you. We're giving away the whole story, though.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, well, we'll do it when we get into hurt. And I do have a little side story about my daughter Sashira. She's 17. And, you know, we're starting to build, like, these segments. Like, in a second, we'll do the Feeling of the Day. So every Tuesday episode, people will get a new feeling of the day that we're gonna focus on and talk about. And today's word. Like, I never really thought about how that was an actual feeling. I mean, I know I've used it like, I feel, but I'm like, wait, that's a feeling? Like, where's the gift? So we'll go over that in a second. But as we were building out, like, you know, things we want to have. Like, in radio, we call them benchmarks. So core things, when you tune in, you're gonna get it. Like when Kat and I were doing the fifth thing, the bonus episode for the Four Things podcast, we how to quote every episode. So now on the Tuesday episodes, you're going to get a feeling of the day. And so I was going over some of that with Sashira, and she goes, can I have a segment on the podcast? And I was like, well, what would your segment be? And she goes, oh, I can talk about all kinds of things, but I really like to discuss about that time that you thought you knew that guy and you were hanging out with the guy all the time. And I knew all along. Like, I knew right away. This is. Something's off, something's not right. And how mom get. Mom's going to fall for anything. And I was like, oh, just to share.

[Kat]

That'd be a good segment.

[Amy Brown]

Well, lucky for her, you're going over a con artist checklist, so this will apply to anything, whether it's, you know, something you've signed up for, dating, a work relationship. You can spot the con artist with the list. But she really was. She knew to come on and make a segment. Oh, she knew. And we. We talked about it whenever I was severing that relationship, which is a little backstory on that. And I'm not going to get into the whole thing because I had to shut it down. I'm like, so sure that's not going to be a segment. But I was spending time with this one particular person, and it turned out not to be a healthy situation.

[Kat]

It's a good way to put it.

[Amy Brown]

And she was 16 at the time, and she knew it. Like, she knew right away. She goes, oh, Mom, I could have told you that from.

[Kat]

Why didn't you?

[Amy Brown]

The beginning. I know.

[Kat]

She's like, she's an adult. She can make an own decision.

[Amy Brown]

She's like, I'm good at sniffing people out and, you know, figuring out those details. So she wanted to come on and share her thoughts about that. However, out of respect for other people involved, like, I don't think it'd be fair for me to tell that entire story. Yeah, maybe I'll feel differently in, like, a year.

[Kat]

Yeah, it's too close right now. And it's also one of those things that the further away from it, the funnier it gets, you know?

[Amy Brown]

Yes, I know.

[Kat]

Wait another year, so it'll be even more funny.

[Amy Brown]

I was thinking about that the other day. It's like, God, how quickly our lives turn, because now I'm in a completely different type of relationship. Completely different type of person. You know, like, he's employed, he has.

[Kat]

A car, stuff like that.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, okay. Feeling of the day. You ready for it?

[Kat]

I'm ready.

[Amy Brown]

Okay. We don't have any, like, fun feeling of the day.

[Kat]

Like, a little extra song. Here is the feeling of the day.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, Cat. Cat. Nailed it. Which, by the way, when I get into the feeling of the day, which is ugly. Ugly is the feeling of the day. But Kat got to my house, and I was running a little behind getting ready, because I am drawing on my eyebrows right now because I had them lasered off, and now they're red. The undertone is red. Like, they're burnt off. Like, I have a little bit of hair, but then underneath where the microbladed. It's like a tattoo was lasered off. And the red part is left. So the red part is going to get removed in, like, seven weeks.

[Kat]

It'll be red for seven weeks?

[Amy Brown]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

And it's red.

[Kat]

Well, right now doesn't look that because.

[Amy Brown]

I put a layer of foundation over my brows, and then I put powder and then I put a little bronzer or something to give it a little skin color because my foundation's a little pale. Probably need to upgrade that. And then I drew on my new brows. Well, I drew them on the first time, and they were a little wonky. So then what do you do? I have to start over.

[Kat]

So did you watch a tutorial?

[Amy Brown]

No. It took me a minute to figure out this concoction. Like, I just kind of thought, well, I'm going to draw over the red. And then I realized if I white them out, basically, and then I give myself more of a blank canvas.

[Kat]

But that's what a lot of people that I see on TikTok. That's what they do. And they have eyebrows, but they put foundation completely over them and make it look like they are bald. And then they start anew and they make their eyebrows look how they want ahead of the. Well, some people just do this anyway, so maybe you're just on the makeup trends. Also, I think you need to shout out the lift and snatch because you're still using it. And I cannot. I can't describe how real they look.

[Amy Brown]

My strokes.

[Kat]

Your strokes? Your strokes are good.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah. It's the brand. Is Nyx next? Is it called Nyx or Nyx? I have no idea.

[Kat]

I don't know, because I think I always read that as NYC in my head.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, well, it's.

[Kat]

Even though it's an X Nyx. Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And lift and snatch is the brow like a pen, and it creates these lifelike strokes. But you gotta have a steady hand because when I first started, I was.

[Kat]

A little nervous, shaky.

[Amy Brown]

But now I've gotten to where I'm like, yeah, you know? So, yeah, maybe I have. Maybe there's a future for me.

[Kat]

And is that why the feeling of the day Ugly? Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Well, you know, we have our emotional barometer box, and I was just flipping through some of them when I came across ugly. It resonated. And I was like, okay, we're gonna do this. So I dedicate this feeling of the day to my brows. Feeling ugly isn't about looks. It's about how we see ourselves when we're down. Our mood distorts our reflection, making us focus on flaws that aren't really there. Even the most beautiful people feel this way. When that happens, we don't need a makeover. We need kindness, love, and perspective. And if we can't find that in ourselves, we can borrow it from someone who sees us clearly.

[Kat]

I love that you picked this. I think I've never seen these cards, so I never have read that and have looked at ugly as an actual emotion. But I do talk about, because I specialize in body image and eating disorders, is that when people see themselves in a mirror, they don't see what they look like. They see how they're feeling. So I love this. And a lot of times when we look in the mirror, we're like, oh, I need to lose weight or I need to dye my hair or I need a new wardrobe, when really it's what you're saying, it's, I need to go do something nice for myself. And then if I come back in, like, an hour, I might see something different.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, it's crazy. Try the dopamine dressing like.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Instead of trying to force some outfit to make yourself fit into, like, a trend or whatever's happening or a color you thought you wanted to wear. Like, go to your closet and get a go to outfit that you know you feel good in and put that on and then go in the mirror and do. What do they call it? The. The super woman pose.

[Kat]

Do you know what I'm talking about?

[Amy Brown]

Where you, like, stand in the mirror.

[Kat]

What is that called? Power pose.

[Amy Brown]

Power. Pos. Superwoman power.

[Kat]

I like superwoman better.

[Amy Brown]

Sometimes I. When I'm doing my meditation, you know, you.

[Kat]

Thumbs up yourself.

[Amy Brown]

No, but you know how some people sit. Well, and a lot of times I do, but I sit calmly with my palms up if I'm wanting to receive and palms down if I'm wanting to feel grounded. And then other times, I just stick my thumb straight in the air with my eyes closed. But I put my arms out really straight and. And I'm trying to channel my thumbs out into the. It's like a little antenna.

[Kat]

I thought you were trying to like, give yourself a thumbs up.

[Amy Brown]

No. Oh, I don't.

[Kat]

Trying to receive the.

[Amy Brown]

Where I got the waves, but sometimes I do, I do it. And I think that that's my body saying, like, I need it. Like, I don't have it in me today.

[Kat]

So like, lord, give it to me.

[Amy Brown]

Lord, give it to me. You know, fill me up, give me the energy. And I picture it going like, I have a visualization of it going, like through my thumb, all the way down my arm into my body.

[Kat]

I kind of. Did you learn that or you just.

[Amy Brown]

I don't know where I learned it. I certainly didn't come. I mean, I. I don't know if it was over time in different meditations that I've done, if maybe a random1 on YouTube. Someone's like, now stick your thumbs in the air. And you're like, okay, I'll do anything. I mean, they definitely didn't call it an antenna. Or who knows, it could have been at a yoga class at one point. Which part of this podcast, flipping over from four things, feeling things, is just the evolution of where we are and the direction my life is going. Meeting you, having you as now a full time host with me, and kind of what we want to share with others and like, come alongside people in their journey of growing and therapy and whatnot. And Kat had a podcast called you need therapy and she has set that aside and is now here with us. So this is going to be like a mixture of what we were doing on four things. And you need therapy. And you'll see it. That's the plan now, but we may continue to evolve. But speaking of evolution, I was thinking back when I first started doing yoga, way, way, way, way, way back in the day, like in Austin, I went to this one class where they had gongs and they were laying there and then they served this little tea afterwards and I'm like, I couldn't get the heck out of there fast enough.

[Kat]

But that was your first experience?

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, because it was this yoga studio sort of close to my mom's house. So I decided to go and I was terrified. Like, I thought they had a gong. I remember even going on the Bobby Bone show the next day and I'm like, I don't know where I went, guys, but it was crazy. Like we were laying down and then we kind of do yoga in unison. Yeah. We did a flow practice, but then between the gong and the kool aid at the end, you can't call it kool Aid. Right. But that's what it felt like to me. And now I'd be like, sign me up. Like, where is this class gonna get a membership?

[Kat]

Nobody uses gongs anymore.

[Amy Brown]

I'm like, I want to breathe in unison. Are we going to chant?

[Kat]

Because it probably felt very different. So you're like, this is weird. I got to get out. And now you're. You've embraced so many different things.

[Amy Brown]

So now I've evolved to where I stick my thumbs in the air and channel the energy. I've also evolved to where I'm doing face fitness in lieu of Botox.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

I think the last time I got injected was six. Six months ago.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

I'm so six months sober, six months clean from Botox. I may go back to it. I'm not anti it at all, like, if somebody wants to get it. But for me, I wanted to know my new baseline. And so for the last three months, so January, February, March, I've been doing face fitness. The first two months, I was doing free things on YouTube. The month of March, I was doing a paid course.

[Kat]

You dove right in.

[Amy Brown]

And Kat thinks that I'm being conned.

[Kat]

Yeah. So we're gonna go a list of things that might indicate that you're being conned by somebody, and then we're going to keep your tally. And based on your score, we're going to vote.

[Amy Brown]

I'm going to vote if you're my scam score.

[Kat]

Your scam score. We'll see if you got conned or not. But before we do that, I do want to say. I don't know if I've said this before, but you doing the no Botox is a big deal, I feel like, because you've. And I mean, I. I'll pat myself on the back too, because I'm doing it too. But I have been getting Botox for a couple years, and you get used to your face looking a certain way. And so stopping doing that, it is like you have to get used to that again. So I think it's a big deal that you're attempting this. Even if you go back to it, it's just, hey, I want to make sure that this is something I still.

[Amy Brown]

Want to do, which I'll touch on the fact that the reason why I decided to get my brows lasered off my microbladed brows is because I stopped the Botox and my Forehead changed. So if you happen to be listening for the first day. I've. I've talked about this in previous episodes, but I'll just give you that tiny bit of information because she might be like, why would you get your brows microbladed and then have them lasered off? Yeah, well, nobody tells you. Nobody tells you when you go get a microbladed with Botox that then when your forehead starts to shift because it's not frozen anymore, your brows can be wonky. And so that was happening to me, so I was like, I need a fresh start.

[Kat]

So thank you for spreading awareness to that. Because, yeah, people might be like, oh, I'm gonna stop this too. And then they're like, oh, no now.

[Amy Brown]

But it may not all. Do everybody's forehead different. Different.

[Kat]

I don't know, depending on where your wrinkles are. Because I. Mine didn't move. Because I. My. It was. My 11 wasn't as. As now pronounced.

[Amy Brown]

I can give you an exercise for that.

[Kat]

Okay, great. So did you get that from your.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, from my. So you take this hook and then you press, like. But you build it real good, and you can even do a vibrating sensation. And then you go all the way up. But you've got to really get deep into the muscle. Deep into the.

[Kat]

So before we go into this list, can you tell me where you found this person? Does she have, like, a credential or TikTok. Got it.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, I think she has. She's an esthetician, sort of training in anatomy and kinesiology. I don't know where she received her letters, but, you know, like, she has a certificate, I'm sure.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

I haven't seen it, but.

[Kat]

Okay, before we get into this, let's talk about the difference between a certificate and a degree.

[Amy Brown]

But she also has one of these cute little skeletons, and she knows all of the bones. Yeah. Like, she'll be like, you're muscle. And I'm like, oh. And then my friend Claire, I was telling her the other day, I was like, you want to massage this? And then Claire said that. She goes, oh, but Claire is a. I know she has degrees.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

But what I'm saying is Claire said it, and it's the exact thing.

[Kat]

Oh. She confirmed it.

[Amy Brown]

Which I don't know what. The reason why I don't know exactly how to say it is because she's foreign.

[Kat]

So you can say in the foreign.

[Amy Brown]

Language, Claire said it, and it sounded similar, and I'm like, that's it. So, yeah, she has an accent, and her English isn't great. So sometimes she's like, you know, what's this called? She's like, oh, your teeth. Or, you know, what's that? That you need to get a. Pull your hair back with a hairband. Stuff like that.

[Kat]

So it's in English.

[Amy Brown]

Yes.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

Yes.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

Yes. Because when I was doing some free YouTube videos, I was having to read the subtitle transcript to know what to do, which was a lot of work because I was, like, trying to, like, massage my face and read. I just want to be told. So she has. Who knows? Maybe she has a million something on TikTok. She has over a million on Instagram. She's on YouTube with millions of views. And then she has a course.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

So the course is what I signed up for. So con artist checklist.

[Kat]

Let's go through it. And I have a affinity for this type of stuff. As you know, I'm very skeptical of everybody. Of everybody. But I learned that the heart. I learned that the hard way, though, because I wanted to trust everybody. And then I got really into things, and I'm like, oh, my gosh, they're lying. And I will say I got a certificate for something back in the day. And as I'm getting this certificate, I was like, I could do this with my eyes closed. So I kind of learned that you have to be aware of what certificate somebody has, you know, because I didn't learn anything in that course, and I could have been doing all kinds of things. Okay, anywho.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, I'll trust just about anybody, so. Which is.

[Kat]

I mean, I'm not better that you're not worse. It's just different.

[Amy Brown]

No, I mean, I feel like you're probably missing out on a lot. Thanks. Which is back to Shira's segment idea that she wanted, where she's like, mom will fall for anything.

[Kat]

We am missing out on a lot. Okay, well, let's go through. This is just a little checklist of things that might signify that somebody is conning you or manipulating you. Okay, so I'm gonna read them, and you're gonna tell me yes or no. Does this fit okay? And if so, like, maybe why?

[Amy Brown]

Introducing Instagram Teen accounts. A new way to keep your teen safer as they grow. Like, making sure they always have their seatbelt on.

[Laura Carenti]

All right, sweetie pie, buckle up.

[Amy Brown]

Good job.

[Kat]

Or ring the bell on their bike.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, kid, give it a try. Nice. Or remember their elbow pads. Knees, too. Okay.

[Kat]

Yep.

[Amy Brown]

There you go. New Instagram Teen accounts. Automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see. Welcome to Pod of Rebellion, our new Star Wars Rebels Rewatch podcast. I'm Vanessa Marshall. Hi, I'm Tia Sircar. I'm Taylor Gray. And I'm John Lee Brody. But you may also know us as Harrison Dullah, Specter 2, Sabine Wren, Specter 5, and Ezra Bridger, Specter 6 from Star Wars Rebels. Wait, I wasn't on Star Wars Rebels. Am I in the right place? Absolutely. Each week we're going to rewatch and discuss an episode from the series and share some fun behind the scenes stories. Sometimes we'll be visited by special guests like Steve bloom voices Zaborelio's Spectre 4, or Dante Bosco voices Jai Kell and many others. Sometimes we'll even have a lively debate.

[Kat]

And we'll have plenty of other fun.

[Amy Brown]

Surprises and trivia too. Oh, and me, well, I'm the lucky ghost crew Stowaway, who gets to help moderate and guide the discussion each week. Kind of like how Kanan guided Ezra in the ways of the Force. You see what I did there? Nicely done, John. Thanks, Tia. So hang on.

[Kat]

Cause it's gonna be a fun ride.

[Amy Brown]

Cue the music. Listen to Potter Rebellion on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Laura Carenti]

Hey, y'all, it's your girl, Cheekies. And I'm back with a brand new season of your favorite podcast, Cheekies and Chill. I'll be sharing even more personal stories with you guys, and I know a lot of people are gonna attack me.

[Kat]

Why?

[Laura Carenti]

Are you gonna go visit your dad? Your mom wouldn't be okay with it. I'm gonna tell you guys right now. I know my mother and I know my mom had a very forgiving heart. That is my story on plastic surgery. This is my truth. I think the last time I cried like that was when I lost my mom like that. Like, yelling. I was like, no. I was like, oh. And I thought, what did I do wrong? And as always, you'll get my exclusive take on topics like love, personal growth, health, family ties, and more. And don't forget, I'll also be dishing out my best advice to you on episodes of Dear Cheekies.

[Kat]

So my fiance and I have been together for 10 years. In the first two years of being together, I find out he is cheating on me. Not only with women, but also with men. What should I do?

[Laura Carenti]

Okay, where do I start? That's not love. He doesn't love you enough. Because if he loved you, he'd be faithful. It's going to be an exciting year. And I hope that you can join me, listen to Cheekies and Chill Season four as part of the My Cultura Podcast network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Kat]

I'm gonna read them and you're gonna tell me yes or no. Does this fit okay? And if so, like, maybe. Why does it seem too good to be true?

[Amy Brown]

Yes. Because, well, I mean, now that I think about it, but I think that I'm like, wow, you can really achieve these results by just massaging your face every day. Like, I guess at the end of the day it does seem too good to be true.

[Kat]

Like, she's over promising, but it still could be possible. Okay, so it's not crazy. It's not like we'll make you look like you're seven. It's like we can make you look like you have Botox by just these three simple.

[Amy Brown]

Right? This is where I struggle because I have my I want to give this a go and I'm trying anything brain. And like, I think it's possible, but also, could it be too good to be true? Yeah. So I'm just answering honestly.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

Like at the end of the day. Yes.

[Kat]

Okay. Okay. Are they promising guaranteed results with no risk?

[Amy Brown]

No, they're not promising guaranteed results. Everybody's at different starting stages, she said, in different ages and.

[Kat]

Okay. Do they make you feel like you're broken or incomplete without using their thing that they're selling or the method?

[Amy Brown]

No.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

Am I not getting conned?

[Kat]

So far you're doing pretty good. Is there a sense of urgency or pressure to buy now or you're going to miss out on something?

[Amy Brown]

Yes.

[Kat]

Okay, what's that? Yes, she said that it was sold out and you were got on a waitlist and then all of a sudden you're in the class.

[Amy Brown]

And then I got an email and it's like, oh, a spot opened up. It's all virtual, by the way. I don't know why it would fill up. You know what I mean?

[Kat]

Wait, so. Yes, that's true.

[Amy Brown]

I know, but you know, maybe she good sales tactics. Maybe she is making sure that her inbox doesn't get overloaded with questions from her current students.

[Kat]

Yeah, that probably is what it. Yeah, that could be it.

[Amy Brown]

But yes, there was definitely urgency. Like, get it now and then the price slash.

[Kat]

Did you buy it before the price slashed?

[Amy Brown]

Yes, but when you go, no, no, sorry, I bought it with the price.

[Kat]

But it's like it was ever that much money.

[Amy Brown]

Exactly.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Because I don't know, because I never saw that page. But once I had access to the page because she had to send you a special link because now I'm special. So then I clicked on the link and it said, you know, like 900. And then it had a big line through it and it was like, now only $199. And you're like, what a deal.

[Kat]

You're like, I just saved $700.

[Amy Brown]

Wow. I was on a wait list. I made it in and now I got the special link. And the special links. This, the price is slashed.

[Kat]

So, yeah, that reminds me of infomercials growing up when they're like, call the next five minutes and you can get this for like 4:99. And then you go to the grocery store and they're selling that same thing for that same price. It's like just to get you to buy it right then. Smart business.

[Amy Brown]

Whenever I think of an infomercial. Did you ever see that one way back in the day with that guy that had the nut chopper? And then he would be chopping the nuts and be late at night, my mom and I, I don't know what we'd be watching late at night, but he would always come on and it'd be like, oh, yeah, my mom loved to buy stuff like that. And so this is your mom? Yeah. And he'd be like, you're going to love my nuts. And he would be chopping it and wait.

[Kat]

This is also a perfect example of how you learn things from your environment. And so you are a product of your environment. Right now we don't have infomercials. We have tik Tok scammers. Okay. Do they call themselves things like face healer or ageless Oracle or just do they call themselves any kind of like self proclaimed guru?

[Amy Brown]

No, but she definitely says that other methods, like if you're doing it this way, you're doing it wrong. But then I've seen other people say, this is how to do it. So. But she doesn't have like a special guru name.

[Kat]

But does she have like, what are her, like, credentials?

[Amy Brown]

I don't know.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

I just know what's in her Instagram bio and I don't know that that's even.

[Kat]

Well, so this is real. This is. Goes to the.

[Amy Brown]

Because I don't know if she's real, Honestly, Sometimes I'm like, is this AI?

[Kat]

I think what gets a lot of people now is anybody can call themselves any kind of like holistic coach or this type of healer or this whatever, and it sounds really fancy. But it's also something they just made up. Like I could. You could call yourself anything. I could call myself anything, and it could sound really good versus somebody who's really doing. That's probably just like an esthetician, you know?

[Amy Brown]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Okay. Are they constantly posting testimonials that sound a little too dramatic?

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, I mean, some of the results are pretty dramatic. So I feel like they either they cherry pick, like this was a good success story, so I'm going to highlight this or it's being photoshopped or something. Maybe. I don't know.

[Kat]

Yeah. Or it's AI the whole thing.

[Amy Brown]

Well, no other people have joined because I see them. I think, I think you're like, I.

[Kat]

Have a whole group of friends in my face fitness Facebook group. Okay. Are they avoiding transparency about what actually is involved?

[Amy Brown]

No.

[Kat]

Like, you have to.

[Amy Brown]

They're pretty transparent. However, I don't know how they have the time in the day. Like, what I. Has been required of me the last 30 days. We don't have this time.

[Kat]

I thought it was just seven, like seven minutes a day.

[Amy Brown]

No, the lesson is 30 minutes. Ish. She said she tries to keep the lessons at 20, but they always go over. So let's just call it what it is. They're 30 then. But before you start the 30 minute, you have to do a two minute lymphatic drainage exercise, which opens up your lymph and that. So that's two minutes. So now we're at 32 then if you want good results, she highly recommends the bonus exercises after that. And so I'm like, this is.

[Kat]

That's every day.

[Amy Brown]

I just do this on top of, you know, go on the. A walk in the forest with the trees.

[Kat]

Is that part of it?

[Amy Brown]

No, you just like do that. That's just another thing that I like to do because I. I want to be with nature and I want to have that hit of dopamine.

[Kat]

Can you do your drainage while you're on your walk?

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, but you want to do your drainage right before you do your face fitness. So.

[Kat]

Okay. Do they discourage you from doing other things that could help?

[Amy Brown]

I haven't caught on to that yet. If she has.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

I don't, I don't think she said, like, don't do. Watch now. She says, like, if you want to do gua, sure. If you want to put the oil on. She goes, but I don't think you need any. But a lot of people are like, oh, I love the oil and the gua sha. And she, she's like, there's a time and a place for that.

[Kat]

Okay. And then are they trying to become, like, your go to person, like, for that? So it could be like your friend. It could be like you're like, mentor your. Are they trying to become something?

[Amy Brown]

I mean, I guess sometimes when she says stuff like that of, like, okay, if you want to do that, but, you know, like, that's not good. You need to do what I'm doing. So.

[Kat]

And then I also want to add, this is online, but if you wanted to, like, meet this person in person.

[Amy Brown]

I don't know where. I don't even know where in the world she is. Like, where. Like. Yeah, where in the world does she reside? I think I saw something the other day on Tick Tock about Miami. But then, you know, Tick Tock's weird. Like, I couldn't figure out that video because I don't even think it was her that posted it. You know, people repost.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Other people's things. So I don't know.

[Kat]

Okay, so your test is done. And I'm going to be honest. You might not be getting scammed.

[Amy Brown]

Oh, okay. Okay. Well, then I'm just getting scammed on time because I just completed the 30 days. And we get an email this morning, like, congratulations, you completed the 30 days. And now for the next 30 days.

[Kat]

She wants you to sign up for something else.

[Amy Brown]

No, this is included. Oh, this is included. A gift from her.

[Kat]

She's giving you a gift.

[Amy Brown]

The gift is for the next 30 days, repeat it the entire thing from day one to day three, because now your hands are stronger, you know the techniques, so you can do it better. And I'm like, wait a second. Wait, I have to do it again?

[Kat]

Well, you're gonna have to do it for the rest of your life.

[Amy Brown]

But where's my certificate? I just completed my 30 days. Like, I want to.

[Kat]

You should be able to teach it now.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, but she said we won't. Won't graduate until we do it again.

[Kat]

Oh.

[Amy Brown]

And then maybe our body will be ready. And what I have learned. Let me tell you, Kat, Let me. Let me tell you a lot of our wrinkles and what we're dealing with or sagging things in the. The front part of our skull, which would be our face. That's what we see, right?

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

But we have the part we don't see, which is the back of our skull, where our skull meets our neck, the top of our. So we have to face here, our neck, our shoulders. We spend more time massaging our trapezius, our Sky. Like all these things that you don't see. We spend so much time. And that's why she said your hands are stronger, because some of the massages, you really have to get in there and, like, your biceps are tired and, like, your arms are up. We do all these, like, other things and these stretches and sometimes a 30 minute workout. We won't even have touched our face. And then I feel like that's a waste. But she says it's not because everything is playing a part. And I can see that. It's when we're relaxed back here, this falls into place. When we're tight here, this sags.

[Kat]

I could see that.

[Amy Brown]

So I'm not getting scammed.

[Kat]

Well, you're not.

[Amy Brown]

You're on board.

[Kat]

You could be.

[Amy Brown]

I will. I will send you the 30 days for just 100. I'll give you a deal. 99.

[Kat]

Can I get a special link?

[Amy Brown]

Yes.

[Kat]

Yes. I also think that you kind of reversed your answer on some of these things. Like, you said it. She hasn't promised. Does it seem too good to be true? And then you said that she is making you do a double 30 days. Like, she's making it seem like it's something that's not. She wants it probably to be like, oh, buy this.

[Amy Brown]

I'm just saying the results sometimes seem too good to be true. Like, when I'm looking at other people's results, I'm like, is this for real?

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And then, yeah, it's gonna be true. Like, we don't have the time. Like, too. But what it is, you're gonna be true. Nobody has time for this.

[Kat]

But also, this is a, I think a key that I don't know if this is happening or not. When you are getting scammed, there's usually always, like, what's next? Like, she's making you do this thing again. But it doesn't sound like she's charging you more money.

[Amy Brown]

No, it's a gift.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

But I feel like that means here's a free gift.

[Kat]

So then you'll buy this other thing.

[Amy Brown]

30 days from now. It'll be like, remember that free gift I gave you?

[Kat]

You owe me.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah.

[Kat]

And then you're gonna feel guilty.

[Amy Brown]

Mm.

[Kat]

So that's one thing I would have people look out for. If there is always something else and it keeps going and you have. You need them. If somebody's not a scammer, they're gonna teach you the thing, and then they're gonna let you go be free on your own. Versus, like, I need you to stay with Me and stay in my tribe. Culty vibes, you know, if I pack.

[Amy Brown]

My bags and move to wherever, like.

[Kat]

In the world, the next step is in person, and I have to go meet her. This plane ticket to I don't know where, you just show up.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

I will say my shoulders are more relaxed and my posture is a little bit better, I feel like. But I. I will say this checklist is good for anybody that's. You know, when you're following certain people on Instagram, it could be just influencers that you follow and they're talking about a particular product. And now there's. There's. I mean, the spectrum is. It's all over the place. But there is one particular girl I started to follow a couple of months ago, and I may unfollow because I've started to realize I get hooked every single time, because I think she's really good about that. Too good to be true. Hook. And she gets me. And, like, one thing, she's into face Fitness. And, well, I guess probably a lot of people that pop up in my account now are face fitness, because the algorithm, that's all it feeds me, so I won't even pin this directly on her. But so many people are like, I canceled my plastic surgery appointment, which. Who knows what her plastic surgery appointment was. Was it for Botox? Because you can get Botox at the plastic surgeon's office. So I don't know if she's claiming she's about to go get a facelift or something, but she said that was her hook. It's like, oh, someone canceled an appointment because of this. I'm going to pause and watch. And then, you know, she does, like, a little temple massage here and, like, a nasal, and then it's like, oh, that's all you do every day for three minutes. And you were able to cancel your. Your appointment at the doctor for whatever it is you wanted to change. But that's an example of one thing that I've seen. And then they're good at in anything they're trying to pitch, whether it's that you learn a skill, a product, or whatever. And some people just. That's their gift. Like, they are really, really good at it.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah.

[Kat]

You just have to be aware. And I think it's a different. If it is taking resources away from you that you actually don't have. That's one thing. Like, this is kind of harmless. I mean, besides the time.

[Amy Brown]

Right. It's hard.

[Kat]

But if you, like, had to sell your house because you had to Afford this fitness score course.

[Amy Brown]

Right.

[Kat]

That is, you're being scammed. And also, you need some. We need to help you in other ways.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, well, I think you concluded I'm currently not getting scammed at the moment, so yay. We can high five on that high five. And then move on to core emotions. And this will be Core emotions, part one.

[Kat]

Yeah. I love talking about feelings, first of all. So I could do this all day long, but I wanted to start. I think we both wanted to start with feelings because we're going to be. Obviously, it's feelings things. We're going to be talking about them all the time and relating things back and learning how to identify my own feelings and learning how to, like, sit in my own feelings has transformed, I think, my relationships in my life in general, because we're getting these gifts. So I like to describe feelings as guides or tools. So they're not good or bad, they're not right or wrong. If once you see this list, you're going to look at it and you're going to say, catherine, there's only one good one. They're all the same. They're all. They all.

[Amy Brown]

They're not good or bad.

[Kat]

Yeah, they're.

[Amy Brown]

They all have an offering.

[Kat]

They all have an offering. And they all have an impairment if you choose not to feel them. And the visual I like to give people is. Feelings are very similar to the lights on the dashboard of your car. So if you're driving down the road, and this resonates with me a lot because I get so frustrated and I, I feel so inconvenienced when a light pops up. So I'm driving down the road and maybe I check engine or my, My change your oil light or something pops up on my car. All that is doing is saying, hey, there's something that you need to go look at or check or pay attention to. So it's a tool, right? That is, it's a guide that's leading you to what your car needs. Yes. If you have to change my oil, probably inconvenient. It might, like, I don't know if I'm on a road trip. Set me back an hour. However, if I don't get that oil changed and my oil change is gone. But con, guess what? My car is going to blow up and I'm not going to ever get to where I'm going, which I have had my car stop in the middle of the road one time because I had no oil and it was so inconvenient and it led me from I was in a rush, and I wanted to get to my full day of work. I didn't want to be late for my clients. And then because I didn't just get my oil changed when I should have, I actually missed that whole day of work. So you're going to be forced to pay attention to it one way or another. Feelings are the same way. So you have a feeling. It's just signaling, hey, there's something that you need to pay attention to that you want to look at, that you just want to, like, care for. Could be inconvenient. But also, if you pay attention to it, you might get something that you're missing or needing.

[Amy Brown]

I think one thing to keep in mind, too, is people that grew up in a really dysfunctional environment, they learned not to feel. And so there's a lot of us walking around. Not me. I just mean humans that don't even know how to feel. And I guess I say not me because I don't like to put my home as, like, dysfunctional, but everybody had their own dysfunction. And I do think that my parents were emotionally unavailable.

[Kat]

Dysfunctional doesn't always mean, like, right. Like negative and bad. It's really. Honestly, we're all, yeah, paying attention. There's dysfunction in every system.

[Amy Brown]

Right. And that's why I had to rewind and sort of stop myself, because I'm like a lot of us walking around because dysfunction. I'm like, not me. But then I was like, shoot, I don't want to discount that. Yeah, there was some dysfunction in my home, and I, as a parent, have created some dysfunction for my kids. And it doesn't mean that you're a bad parent or, my parents were bad. Now, some people grew up in an environment where, yeah, you'd probably classify their. Their upbringing as like, oh, that was really rough. I had loving parents. They loved the best that they could, but they also were very shut down themselves. So that's something I'm trying to undo that generational trauma. Like, whatever they had from their parents, they were just doing the best that they could. And I'm trying to offer my kids all the space to feel, and we want to feel all the things and ask all the questions and dive in. And I'm excited about doing this for people that maybe are, like, me in their 40s, where they're trying to figure some stuff out that they. They didn't have access to early on.

[Kat]

Introducing Instagram teen accounts, a new way to keep your teen safer as they grow. Like, making sure they've got the Right. Gear for writing.

[Amy Brown]

Knee pads.

[Kat]

Check.

[Amy Brown]

And helmet.

[Kat]

Done. See you, dad. New Instagram teen accounts, automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see.

[Laura Carenti]

Hey, y'all, it's your girl, Cheekies. And I'm back with a brand new season of your favorite podcast, Cheekies and Chill. I'll be sharing even more personal stories with you guys, and I know a lot of people are going to attack me. Why are you going to go visit your dad? Your mom wouldn't be okay with it. I'm going to tell you guys right now. I know my mother, and I know my mom had a very forgiving heart. That is my story on plastic surgery. This is my truth. I think the last time I cried like that was when I lost my mom like that, like, yelling. I was like, no. I was like, oh. And I thought, what did I do wrong? And as always, you'll get my exclusive take on topics like love, personal growth, health, family ties, and more. And don't forget, I'll also be dishing out my best advice to you on episodes of Dear Cheekies.

[Kat]

So, my fiance and I have been together for 10 years. In the first two years of being together, I find out he is cheating on me, not only with women, but also with men. What should I do?

[Laura Carenti]

Okay, where do I start? That's not love. He doesn't love you enough. Because if he loved you, he'd be faithful. It's going to be an exciting year, and I hope that you can join me. Listen to Cheekies and Chill, Season 4 as part of the My Cultura Podcast Network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Kat]

Sonoro and iHeart's Mike Kultura podcast Network present the Setup, a new romantic comedy podcast starring Harvey Guillen and Christian Navarro. The setup follows a lonely museum curator searching for love. But when the perfect man walks into his life. Well, I guess I'm saying I like it. You like me. He actually is too good to be true.

[Amy Brown]

This is a con. I'm conning you to get the Delato painting.

[Kat]

We could do this together. To pull off this heist, they'll have to get close and jump into the deep end together. That's a huge leap, Fernando, don't you think? After you, Chulito. But love is the biggest risk they'll ever take. Fernando's never going to love you as.

[Amy Brown]

Much as he loves in this job.

[Kat]

Truly, though, that painting is ours. Listen to the setup as part of the Mike Worldura Podcast Network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Yeah. I think it is important to note that when we are in our dysfunction, most of the time it's coming from a good place. I'm doing what I know, I'm doing what I'm taught, doing what I think is right. And specifically with feelings, because a lot of them are uncomfortable to feel, steering somebody away from them probably feels like sometimes the right thing to do. And then another thing to note is that because feelings signify a need, that's why a lot of us shut them down. Because I don't want to have to need something. Because sometimes we're taught that we don't need to be needy or we don't need to draw attention to ourselves, especially women. So we. We shut those down and we're like, oh, that's. I'm. I'm okay. I'm fine. When really that's going to come out a different way. These feelings are also like energy. So if I'm going to shut it down, I have to put that energy somewhere in my body. And to do that, I'm going to have to displace something else. So something's going to come out and then that energy is still down there. And eventually you're gonna have to get that out because you're gonna have something else to put there.

[Amy Brown]

But it's gonna be way more of an inconvenience. Sort of like when you break down on the side of the road, if you would have just addressed it early on.

[Kat]

Yes, yes. And I. I say all this too. I am a therapist who goes to therapy myself, and I'm not perfect at this stuff. So when I talk about this, this stuff, or teach it, it's also reminders for me and anybody who's listening. I would just want you to give yourself a lot of grace because as you'll hear in some of the stories we tell, I still get stuck in this stuff as well because of just the way our world is.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

Well, we'll especially get into that when we talk about hurt.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

But we're gonna start with feeling one, which is lonely.

[Kat]

Yes. And I do wanna shout out these little worksheets that we made. So we made our own feeling wheel that specifically talks about these eight emotions. And these feelings are not the, like I said in the beginning, the right feelings. They're just the ones that I use. And you look like, here we are, exhibit A.

[Amy Brown]

But these are something that people can have access to for a limited time.

[Kat]

If you sign up in the next.

[Amy Brown]

30 seconds, there's a wait list to get these, and we'll send you a special link, and then you can download them.

[Kat]

Give us your bank account number.

[Amy Brown]

No, no, really, we should do a little thing. I mean, we're not going to. But what if we did a thing where it's like, this was 500 and we put a red line through and we're like, zero? Now it's zero dollars. All you have to do is sign up for a newsletter.

[Kat]

We really should do that. I feel like that'd be funny.

[Amy Brown]

I feel like an inside joke. Yeah. If people even made it to this point in the podcast, they're like, what?

[Kat]

Who would buy that for 500? Like, literally no.

[Amy Brown]

Right. So. But really, if you sign up for our newsletter, you will get the feelings wheel, the gifts of feelings, which is another wheelchart situation. And then sort of this flowchart, which I think is great, which really breaks down the gifts that you'll get from each feeling. And then the impairment and the need.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And the need, which is so helpful because. Prophet. To get in this another time, but I was on a phone call with my boyfriend today, and I don't know, I'm realizing I don't know how to express my needs well. Because part of it feels selfish.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah. So that's all I'll say about that. So something I'm working on too. And Kat's the expert. She's the therapist. But I love that you said I'm a therapist that also goes to therapy, because I'd like to say I'm a normal, everyday human that's not a therapist that also goes to therapy. So we're the same.

[Kat]

Yeah, we're the same.

[Amy Brown]

We're the same.

[Kat]

And I will say with the need, that's like a jumping off point, because sometimes that's not always the exact need. So I would take that as like a. I take it with a grain of salt, I guess, where this could be it or it could be a version of this, but it does help you start thinking about what it is. I don't want people to get too stuck on that part because sometimes I might be like, that doesn't fit. Okay, so do you want to just get into it?

[Amy Brown]

Yeah. Lovely.

[Kat]

We're feeling one, so we're starting with lonely. That core need is to be known. And so that can be a version of a lot of different things. Like, being known can mean different things to different people. I might just want my friend to see me. I might want Maybe in a. There was an event or. You know what? I'll just get into this. I feel like in the situation we had, I was feeling a little lonely because I wanted to be a more. A part of the production that we were creating. And so I felt like you were over there and I was over here, and I just wanted you to know more about what I could offer.

[Amy Brown]

Oh, and that was lonely for you.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And we'll get into more of the. In the weeds of that. When we talk about the feeling of hurt. When I think of lonely, I think of a time when we first adopted the kids or. I was going through certain things in my marriage where I didn't have community around that because these were situations that I had never encountered before. And I kind of felt like I was the only one I didn't know. There were groups of people that would meet and gather. Like, I. Yeah, I'm like, shoot, what have I said? What have I not said over the years? Because it's not just my story. So there's things that I went through that are involving other people, and it's their story, too. So that's why I'm careful with details and what I say and what I don't say. But what I can say about that is I spent a lot of time alone in my closet crying. And that was before I found Community in what I was going through in both situations. So as an adoptive mom and as a wife, there were things. And once I found Community on the Internet, okay, you weren't scammed there first through Facebook, but then I was like, oh, this is a group. And then, you know, that was a group where you had to get invited in. So I was all nervous.

[Kat]

You got a special link.

[Amy Brown]

I got in. But then once I got in, and then I did meet them in person, so I realized there was a group of moms that were gathering right here in Nashville, where it was a very safe space and you could say anything, and there was no judgment. And then in my marriage, I found another group where I got to go meet, and I'm like, oh. And that gave me tools to get through that.

[Kat]

And people saw you. You felt like, there's a different version.

[Amy Brown]

And heard like, I was like, oh, I'm not alone.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And then now I'm still involved in those things, but now when I was calling some of those women feeling lost and alone and like, can you help me? It's like, now periodically, I get a text or an email or phone call from other people, are like, hey, my friend, Is going through this right now. Can I give her your number or can this, you know, my co worker's cousin is going through this. Can you. I mean, that's how distant. That's how desperate sometimes people are to find people that understand what they're going through. Because sometimes you just don't know anybody. And it takes reaching out and asking others, hey, do you know anybody? And then they might be like, oh, yeah, my neighbor's cousin, sister's father in law's stepdaughter is exactly who you can call. Let me reach out to her. And so now I'm on the receiving end of that. Where I was the one seeking that out, and people were there for me. I'm able to now be like, oh, hey, here's what we did. This is what I can say. Can't say for sure that it will work for. For you, but this is a starting point. And then hopefully they feel less alone.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And so that. That was the part where I felt very lonely. And then once I found the community. But it took me being proactive.

[Kat]

Well, it took you acknowledging and allowing yourself to feel the feeling. So if you didn't allow yourself to feel lonely, that that impairment would lead you to be apathetic. It would lead you to have distance. You wouldn't have as close of relationships. I think that would even affect your relationships that you already had keep pulling back because you would keep feeling like different or people didn't understand, or you just would want to keep shutting yourself down. And the only way to do that is to not be face to face with what you don't have. And then by feeling, the feeling didn't feel very good. I'm sure those moments in your closet were excruciating. But that led you to intimacy and connection, which I think it's the gift. That's the gift. Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

We want the gift. Intimacy and connection with a little bow on it.

[Kat]

Yeah. Okay. Okay.

[Amy Brown]

So are we good? Feeling one, check.

[Kat]

Feeling one, check. We could do a whole episode probably on each of these. But lonely specifically. We really could.

[Amy Brown]

Especially since. Especially since I say that already, because in my brain. Did I say that out loud twice?

[Kat]

Maybe since.

[Amy Brown]

Especially since now you said it five times. Uh, your CD's not skipping. Well, since the pandemic, loneliness has been an epidemic of sorts. Yeah, I'm sure we could spend a lot of time on it, but we can move on to yeah, feeling too.

[Kat]

We will come back.

[Amy Brown]

Which will be hurt. Yeah. Which is where Kat's gonna share how I hurt her.

[Kat]

I felt Hurt.

[Amy Brown]

But I.

[Kat]

You didn't do it to me.

[Amy Brown]

I didn't do it to you, and I didn't mean to.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

I didn't even know I was doing it.

[Kat]

So I like to say that nobody can make you feel anything.

[Amy Brown]

That's right.

[Kat]

So I.

[Amy Brown]

Feelings 101.

[Kat]

Right. And the reason I believe that is because the same thing could have happened to 10 other people and not everybody would have felt the same thing. It's. What is happening in the world is hitting my story and my stuff, and then I feel something about it. So not trying to invalidate what I was feeling. I'm just really trying to. That's helpful when you confront somebody about it where I'm not like, you did this to me. It's. I felt this. So hurt. That need is a lot of times just simply attention. Attention to whatever it is came up. And I'll share the story, but first I'll share the impairment and the gift. So if you are unaware and you don't let yourself actually acknowledge hurt, which I think we do a lot, because when we're. Our feelings are hurt, I feel like people make that sound, like, weak or you're being dramatic or get over it. Like, you know, that's the whole, like, pull yourself up by your bootstraps and like, keep going. Like, oh, if it's not broken, keep going kind of thing. And so when we're unaware, that really leads to resentment. And what I do most of the time is I become passive aggressive or I like, stonewall people. I'll cut people out without even realizing it. So we don't want that. However few.

[Amy Brown]

No, we don't. Especially since we just launched the podcast.

[Kat]

We can't be having that. And then.

[Amy Brown]

But our friendship is more important to me than the podcast. So there's that. Yeah.

[Kat]

And if you are aware, it leads to healing, which obviously feels good. And it helps build courage. So the more I can actually confront somebody about an experience I had, the more courage I have to do that. Because it is hard. It's vulnerable. You don't know how somebody's going to respond.

[Amy Brown]

And I feel like sometimes in a romantic relationship, when we decide to actually let someone in and share a feeling or what we are feeling, I think it's important to say, I am feeling this way. Not to your partner. A lot of times in relationships you'd be like, well, you made me feel this way, so I'm glad you clarified that. That nobody can make you feel a certain way. But there is this fear of if there's not healthy communication that it's your feelings won't be valid, that it'll be met with. You're being dramatic.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Or you're overreacting, which that can happen.

[Kat]

And I get the one. There are people that you confront. There's people that you don't there. If you know somebody is going to probably not be receptive and you've already been through this, then there's more of a boundary of, okay, I need to find healing. But that healing might not always come from the person that I felt the hurt with.

[Amy Brown]

So do you think that that's the case even if you're in a romantic relationship with someone?

[Kat]

Well, if you're in a romantic relationship with somebody, I would say, let's talk about it. And if they are not able to validate your feelings consistently over and over and over again, then maybe you are not in a healthy relationship and you want to evaluate do I want to still be in this. I think there's some people we can't avoid. Like a boss or like my parents or just somebody who's in your life that you. For one reason other, you can't just. It's not that easy to end that relationship. So evaluate that because you don't want to, then put yourself in a position where that's going to feel even worse or that's going to kind of dig deeper a story you already have in your head.

[Amy Brown]

So that's that. Just the side note of healing doesn't have to come from the person that hurt you.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Okay. And in our case, we were able to resolve it pretty quickly, which I think was a good thing to experience early on in this endeavor because it was related to episode one, this very episode. Except for you're not listening to the original episode that we did because we already recorded an entire episode one, and it is trashed. It's actually literally in Cat's trash box on her computer. Yeah, it's in the trash. Which is for the better.

[Kat]

Yeah. Do you want to share what happened to it?

[Amy Brown]

Well, so I.

[Kat]

Okay, you share your part, I'll share my part.

[Amy Brown]

I'll share my part. So I woke up two days after we recorded it. So we recorded it because we were trying to get way ahead because, you know, we have video now of everything Shout out. Go to our Instagram at Feelings Things podcast. Yeah, we're only five years behind on that, but we're gonna consistently have video. I've dabbled in that with four things a little bit. But this just part of our. Our. Our big Girl pants now. And we filmed it, recorded it, and with social stuff, we were trying to get way ahead of schedule. And so I woke up two days after we recorded it, and I just had this feeling, it's almost like I woke up even in the middle of the night, of like, something was off. I didn't like the way we did it. I didn't like the vibe. I didn't like the energy. I, I know that it's okay if we have a niche and we're leaning more therapy. And in the first episode, I was very clear on that this wasn't a therapy podcast. In fact, it was in our original podcast description. You know, Kat's a therapist, and it's like, this isn't a therapy podcast. Like, I felt the need to say that Kat's a therapist. She had a podcast for years, a successful podcast that a lot of people love, called you need therapy. And then she's setting that aside to come join me, which was something you wanted to do, too, but we're joining together, and here I am being like, this isn't a therapy podcast. Just so that everybody knows over and over. And I think you were sitting there thinking, like, why does she keep saying this so much? Like, this is, this is like a sort of a slap to my face of, like, I'm a therapist and I have a lot to offer and I would like for this to lean therapy. Well, I knew we may lean therapy, but some reviews or comments that I have seen about me over the last four years or so, dms, comments on my Instagram, reviews of the podcast, like, on itunes. Oh, this is leaning way too therapy for me. Or Amy's just too therapy. I can't listen to her anymore.

[Kat]

Mean stuff.

[Amy Brown]

Which I've evolved.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And so, yeah, maybe I am leaning that way because of things that I'm learning and that I find interesting and stuff I have going on in my life. I, I, I just want to share. Like, I'm not claiming to be the expert or anything. It just can be maybe, like, come alongside other people that are going through things. And when I read that about me, I thought, well, shoot, I don't want to be put in that box. So bringing you on as a therapist, I think I had this, like, it wasn't awareness. Awareness of it, but maybe just somewhere in my subconscious of, like, oh, Kat's a therapist. So I need to make sure that people know this isn't going to be a therapy podcast, because then they're going to say more bad things about me. So it was my own fear. And so I woke up two days after we recorded and I'm like, why am I worried about what Eeny, Meeny, Miny and Mo have said on itunes? Reviews about me and how I am as a person now. And if they can't listen, that's fine. If they don't want to listen, that's okay. There are other people that may want this type of content. So we are a therapy podcast. Ish.

[Kat]

Mental health minded.

[Amy Brown]

Kat gave me that. We are mental health minded. So we're mental health minded. Kat's a therapist. I don't even need to reiterate over and over how we're not a therapy podcast, because who cares? We're just going to be what we are and see where it goes. And some episodes may lean more therapy. Some episodes may not. And we've got our couch Talk episodes on Thursday where people are going to be writing in and it may be questions they might ask a therapist or a friend, which sometimes your conversations with a friend is like therapy. So I just woke up with this feeling of we need to redo this. I feel bad that I made it that way. And it's okay to have a niche. And our niche is this. Screw anybody else who doesn't like it.

[Kat]

Introducing Instagram teen accounts, A new way to keep your teen safer as they grow. Like making sure they've got the right gear for writing.

[Amy Brown]

Knee pads, shack and helmet.

[Kat]

Done. See you there. New Instagram teen accounts, automatic protections for who can contact your teen and the content they can see. Sonoro and iHeart's Mikeultura Podcast Network present the Setup, a new romantic comedy podcast starring Harvey Guillen and Christian Navarro. The setup follows a lonely museum curator searching for love. But when the perfect man walks into his life.

[Amy Brown]

Well, I guess I'm saying I like.

[Kat]

You, you like me. He actually is too good to be true. This is a con.

[Amy Brown]

I'm conning you to get the gelato painting.

[Kat]

We could do this together. To pull off this heist, they'll have to get close and jump into the deep end together.

[Amy Brown]

That's a huge leap, Fernando, don't you think?

[Kat]

After you, Chulito. But love is the biggest risk they'll ever take. Fernando is never going to love you.

[Amy Brown]

As much as he loves this job.

[Kat]

That painting is ours. Listen to the setup as part of the Mike Podcast Network, available on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Amy Brown]

Welcome to Pod of Rebellion, our new Star Wars Rebels rewatch podcast. I'm Vanessa Marshall. Hi, I'm Tia Sircar. I'm Taylor Gray. And I'm John Lee Brody. But you may also know us as Harrison Doula's Spectre 2, Sabine Wren's Specter 5, and Ezra Bridger, Spectre 6 from Star Wars Rebels. Wait, I wasn't on Star Wars Rebels. Am I in the right place? Absolutely. Each week we're going to rewatch and discuss an episode from the series and share some fun behind the scenes stories. Sometimes we'll be visited by special guests like Steve Blume voices Zaborielio's Spectre 4, or Dante Bosco voices Jai Kell and many others. Sometimes we'll even have a lively debate. And we'll have plenty of other fun surprises and trivia, too. Oh, and me, well, I'm the lucky ghost crew Stowaway, who gets to help moderate and guide the discussion each week. Kind of like how Kanan guided Ezra in the ways of the Force. You see what I did there? Nicely done, John. Thanks, Tia. So hang on, cuz.

[Kat]

It's going to be a fun ride.

[Amy Brown]

Cue the music. Listen to Potter a Bell on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. So then I called you and I'm like, hey, this is what I'm thinking about this. And you were literally on your way to therapy. I know. To just like, rip me a new one with your therapist. And you're in the car and you're like, oh, my gosh, I can't believe you called and you're saying all this right now. Because you were like, I've been trying to process how I'm going to talk through this with my therapist so I can figure out what I need from this. Because you left that recording like, what am I even doing here? But I didn't know you felt that way. And so I. By saying over and over, this isn't a therapy podcast. That was hurting you. And so I'm sorry for that.

[Kat]

Thank you.

[Amy Brown]

That's my perspective.

[Kat]

Yeah. And. Well, I think most of what you said is what happened. So we recorded this episode. I kept hearing the it's not a therapy podcast over and over and over again. And I think I. You didn't realize how much you were saying it. And I clocked it every single time. So I was really. I actually was really fearful and anxious that day recording because I didn't know how to be because I was worried if I, like I feel today, I. I can talk as much as I want or as little as I want. I can Share whatever I want. I can add things, but I was trying to, like, stay inside these imaginary bounds that had been created because we weren't a therapy podcast. But I also was trying to. And I talked to this about with my therapist before, too. I have to maintain some professional boundaries for myself as well, because I. I want people who either. If you are my client, I want you to be able to listen to this just like you could listen to. You need therapy. And I. I want to be congruent with how I show up as a therapist and how I show up here, because this is public. And so I didn't. I was like, I feel like a dud. Like, I can't be fun and I can't be smart, or I can't be. Like, I didn't know how to be.

[Amy Brown]

Well, that one comment isn't that interesting. Me saying that over and over dimmed your light.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

And that's the last thing I would want to do, is dim your light. But it was my own insecurity of worrying about whomever.

[Kat]

Well, I also heard a lot of stuff that you said, and I filtered a lot of stuff. Like when I was, like, going back and recounting the conversation, I. I think I exaggerated things that happened because I was hearing them through. This is not a therapy podcast. So whenever you would, like, stop me, I was like, oh, my God, it did something wrong, right? Like, it. I just. I felt so. I got a lot of emotions. So it wasn't just. As you can see, you're feeling multiple emotions at once, not just one. So I was going to go to my therapist. Well, and the next day was your birthday. So I was like, well, I'm not going to talk about it with her. And I also had this feeling that I didn't like that I was like, does she think I'm stupid? Like, does she not? No, I felt like, does she not respect me? And. And that all started coming up, and I was like, why is this bothering me so much? So I knew I needed to process it. I know. I. I knew that I didn't want to talk about it on your birthday, but after your birthday party, I came home and I said to Patrick, I said, amy's such a good friend, and it's because I was seeing you in a different light, too. It was like, this was not about work. And I was like, she does like me and think this about me and think this about me. So what was going on in me that I saw everything she was saying and doing through this filter and through this lens. So I knew part of it was my own stuff. But still, the timing was so weird, because I even walked into my therapist's office, and I said, okay, I don't really know my. What my angle is now, today, because I was gonna talk about this, but now I need to talk about this. And. And honestly, I was thinking about this today, too, when I was driving to work. That experience was very helpful. I think, for our relationship, there is healing. But also, why does this make me emotional? I think that it allowed me to open up a place that I need healing in my own life, too. And again, somebody hurt, they're being hurt doesn't mean you did anything wrong. It almost is like you showed me a spot that I need to go back and address. Because I realized that a lot of my life, I have survived on being smart. And that's what I offered. Like, that's what I was versus I was other things. But that was like, what I was like, well, if I have this, I'm okay, and I want. I went back, and I. I started talking about all the things that I wish I would have done as a kid. I was like, and I want to do these things, and I want to do these things. And one of them was, like, an improv class. And I was like, amy's been trying to get me to do an improv class. Like, she's trying to heal this part of me, and I don't even know it. So it was very cool for me be able to take that experience, really sit with it, use it as a tool. What is it that I need? There are things that I need that I had no idea I was still feeling pain from. That had nothing to do with you.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, well, and I think that that's the beauty of the experience. That's the gift of allowing yourself to feel the emotion, and also us feeling safe enough to come to each other and both want to hear what the other person has to say. Like, I called you and woke up with this epiphany, and I shared it. And then you were able to finally say, especially because you didn't want to bring it up on my birthday. Like, okay, well, you're not gonna believe this, but I'm about to go into my therapist. And you were able to share with me. Exactly. And I held space for that.

[Kat]

You were really good at listening, which.

[Amy Brown]

If I wasn't in a healthy place, who knows if I could have held space for that. If I had a different filter, that then I was taking what you were saying through, and that's what I think can happen when there's big disconnects in relationships. It's like everyone has their filter, and it's like nobody's feeling seen or heard, and it's like, oh. And so I was very thankful that we were able to come to a resolution and heal that in such a timely manner. And I think that was a gift for us, especially starting this out, because it's episode one, and it's a gift.

[Kat]

For everybody else, too. That episode was not good.

[Amy Brown]

It wasn't good.

[Kat]

Let's be honest.

[Amy Brown]

It was pretty terrible. People probably unsubscribed, so I think we were both just not ourselves, because I was too busy trying to fit a mold that I think listeners would want of me and then trying to force you into that when you're like, hello, yeah, I'm Kat. And I'm.

[Kat]

I am like, that's part of who I am.

[Amy Brown]

Went to grad school.

[Kat]

Don't tell anybody. It's not a therapy podcast. Oh, yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Oh, yeah. No, we're over that.

[Kat]

Yeah. Okay.

[Amy Brown]

This is the. Whatever you need it to be podcast, so.

[Kat]

Well, yeah, but we do have a niche.

[Amy Brown]

But we have a niche.

[Kat]

Yes.

[Amy Brown]

Feelings and therapy.

[Kat]

But I, I. There's a. There's so many gifts in that. I think that is. I'm glad that happened because of the things that I'm gaining in my own life. The things that we're able to gain from each other. Like, we're learning about each other in that.

[Amy Brown]

Well, something else you said to me that stood out of, like, you're, like, I'm also trying to figure out, like, I always have the need to be right. And you're. You were able to say, this is even an issue in my own marriage of, like, that I always have to be right. So I just wanted to.

[Kat]

So I was. Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Hype up your awareness and be like, okay. Yes, you. When you have awareness, it's. It's so beautiful. It can suck because you're like, I.

[Kat]

Hate that part of me.

[Amy Brown]

I am this way. And people have to put up with me being this way. But you can work on it.

[Kat]

Yeah. And when. How.

[Amy Brown]

And I can work on it.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

I wasn't saying you.

[Kat]

You can work on this part of you.

[Amy Brown]

Because you're not always right, Kat.

[Kat]

I'm really not. And I am glad you said that, because I forgot that was one of the things I was going to go in and talk about. Of. I need to be better at knowing when I really am in the right and when I am being Stubborn. And when I'm just used to people listening to me because I work by my. I work for myself. So I haven't had a boss since I was 26. So I'm in this new partnership, and I'm like, dang it, is it? Am I not good at working with people? And I'm married to somebody who's very agreeable, so I want there to be space for his voice. And so this was another opportunity for me to say, for me to feel like, what does it feel like when I really do feel like this is something that has happened? And what does it feel like when I'm just being. My ego's taking over. Yeah, we all have it. Even though we don't want it. We need it to survive. But, yeah, I like to say self awareness really is knowing that there's so much stuff that you don't know.

[Amy Brown]

Yes.

[Kat]

So the more self awareness I have, the more I know that, like, I need a lot of help, which we'll get to, because that's part of another feeling.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah. And you can find all the help you need here because we're a therapy podcast. Just kidding.

[Kat]

You've gone from one side of the spectrum to the other.

[Amy Brown]

I know, but now I'm being. Yeah, I'm joking.

[Kat]

You're being silly.

[Amy Brown]

We just are who we are. And you are a therapist, and I, I, I'm trying to figure out here with what do you think on time? Because I feel like we've. Should we keep going through the other two, or should we stop with hurt and then pick back up? Pick back up next week with.

[Kat]

Yeah, yeah, Fear.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, we'll do two.

[Kat]

We'll do two at a time. Maybe two or three, maybe.

[Amy Brown]

Oh, yeah, let's do that because we've got stories. Because with fear, I feel like I have a whole story about my boyfriend.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy Brown]

We can get into that cliffhanger and.

[Kat]

Tune in next time for the story about her boyfriend.

[Amy Brown]

We call it tease.

[Kat]

That's what we call tea. Subscribe, follow if you subscribe, we'll send you the special episode about Amy's fear for free. And it's worth a thousand dollars.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, we'll give you all the details, which really doesn't matter, but I, I want to share it because, I mean, it does matter. Why do we say things that sometimes we don't mean? It does matter. I think it's important when you recognize a fear, because that's when, if you set aside, you will miss out on life. You will miss out on something. It could be Unexpectedly fabulous.

[Kat]

And fear doesn't. Well, we're getting into it. Fear does not mean stop all the time. Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't. So let's get. Let's pause. Let's pause because I'm gonna get ahead of myself.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, so fear. Coming up next Tuesday.

[Kat]

Stay tuned.

[Amy Brown]

Be one of our core feelings. And then feeling four, which we get into that next week with fear is a little weird to me. It's glad. I never really. I know it's a core feeling. Glad, but I don't know that I spend too much time. You paint the word glad, so I'm glad. We are.

[Kat]

It is like an old person word. I feel like it's like gladness. Feels like it's from the 1920s or something. You know, like, who says I'm glad?

[Amy Brown]

Well, I say it when I. Oh, I'm glad about that. But I don't ever be. Like, I feel glad.

[Kat]

Yeah, well, we'll get into it.

[Amy Brown]

And I can't wait to feel more glad.

[Kat]

I will say with the feelings wheel, when you guys see it, which I don't know if. Did we say that we're sending it to them? If we did say that, we weren't kidding about that. We really will send it to you.

[Amy Brown]

All you have to do is sign up for the newsletter. There's no tricks.

[Kat]

Yeah. And we'll send you all those things. But you'll see that there's eight core. And then outside of the core feelings, they're what I like to call shades of the feelings. So with glad, there's so many. That's the wrong one. That's gifts.

[Amy Brown]

Oh, these are gifts.

[Kat]

So that one. Yeah, yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Feelings.

[Kat]

So if you look at glad, there's different shades of gladness. So you could use different. What are other words on there for glad? Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Excited, encouraged, Happy, content, Satisfaction, Optimistic. That's a different shade of yellow, though. And then an even lighter shade of it would be.

[Kat]

I didn't organize them in the shapes, though.

[Amy Brown]

Oh, okay.

[Kat]

Yeah. So. And that's not a all encompassing. Those are just other words you could use because sometimes it's hard to come up with the word, and it's helpful to look at that. But even with, like, anger and fear and all of those. Sometimes anger and fear and those words feel too heavy. But that's why we have all these different shades of the. It's still the same core root.

[Amy Brown]

Right.

[Kat]

But it's might be a more palatable or more fitting word.

[Amy Brown]

Okay, so I think since we spent some time on hurt, we can wrap up with that one because I think it's a good way to look at it. Like, although, dang, you just flat out were feeling hurt.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

Like you got straight to that core. But the lighter shade of green is offended. I was sort of sometimes counting.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

All your hard work. Disappointed, because you're like, wait, I just left this and I came and I'm doing this with you. And now I don't even know my role, which also could feel rejected is under there. So then you're feeling rejected because I'm shutting up. Shocked, because you're like, what? What happened? That's another one. So under hurt, it's despair, shock, betrayed, rejected, offended, disappointed, pain. And then you were having your own pain. So. Yeah.

[Kat]

So that those words might just be more helpful if the other ones don't.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah. I love the feelings wheel. You did a great job, Kat.

[Kat]

Thank you.

[Amy Brown]

So good. So feeling things with Amy and Kat, we have our own wheel. We have our gifts of feelings. And then the feelings, the feeling flow chart, which I love. Like, this I'm going to use in my everyday life, things in my relationship, things with my kids where there's four columns. Impairment, feeling, need, and gift. And I'm going to be referencing this all the time.

[Kat]

And I do have to shout this out because copyright this. The majority of this comes from this feelings flowchart comes from Chip Dodds, the voice of the heart. And he also uses those same eight core feelings. So it aligns really well. So I don't want anybody to think that I created that, that I have adapted from other people's work.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, you noted it on the PDF.

[Kat]

So when I didn't want to get sued.

[Amy Brown]

When it is downloaded, when you sign up for the newsletter and then you get these files, it said this chart was adapted from Chip Dodds, the voice of the heart. And then shout out Lindsay Gibson for her. She has a adult children of emotionally immature parents. That is me.

[Kat]

I have the book in my bag.

[Amy Brown]

That is me.

[Kat]

That book is really good to just help understand why we don't feel the. These feelings as easily as we want.

[Amy Brown]

Yeah, this is good stuff. What. What I'm saying is you're going to want to sign up for our newsletter because if anything, you're just gonna get this and this is gonna be something you can reference or, you know, you can hit up. You know, I'm sure Chip has it somewhere.

[Kat]

Somewhere. Yeah.

[Amy Brown]

But is his color coordinated?

[Kat]

That's pretty. I.

[Amy Brown]

The colors are pretty because Cat color coordinated it. So, yeah, I guess that's yeah, that's it. That's a wrap on episode one. I mean, we encourage y'all to. Yeah. Follow us on socials. Feeling Things podcast is the handle. Feeling Things Podcasts. There's other Feeling Things accounts where the podcast one and when you'll see my face and Cat's face, so it should be pretty clear. And then we want to hear for you from you for couch talks or anything else you want to share. Couch Talks will be our Q A episode, which will be every Thursday. So coming up in a couple of days, we'll have our very first couch talks. And the email for that is. Hey there, Feeling Things podcast dot com. Cat originally thought it was hello, but yeah, sorry, oopsie.

[Kat]

I also got locked out of our email for like three weeks. I was silently panicking. But we're in.

[Amy Brown]

We're in. We are in. We're reading your emails. So hey there at feeling things podcast.com. thank you for being here and we.

[Kat]

Hope you have the day you need to have.

[Amy Brown]

Boom. Bye. Foreign.

[Kat]

What'S up?

[Laura Carenti]

I'm Laura, host of the podcast Courtside.

[Kat]

With Laura Carrenti, a masterclass case study of the business of women's sports.

[Laura Carenti]

I'll be chatting with leaders like tennis icon Alana Kloss.

[Amy Brown]

I don't do what I do only for women. I do it for everyone.

[Kat]

And I want the whole market and innovators like Jenny win. I would say 50% of the people that to come visit the sports bra aren't sports fans. They come to be in community. They come to be part of this culture. Courtside with Laura Carenti is an iHeart women's sports production in partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. Listen to Courtside with Laura carenti on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Amy Brown]

Presented by Elf Beauty, founding partner of iHeart Women's Sports. Are your money skills total trash? Well, trust me, you are not alone. Personal finance ignorance is as American as Apple P. But you can improve.

[Kat]

Think, Matt, if your emergency fund was invested, especially given the volatility we're experiencing right now. Ouchies. Investing it is ultimately a necessity.

[Amy Brown]

But you got to keep that emergency fund accessible. It needs to be cash parked in your savings.

[Kat]

It's time to learn. And how to money is here to bring the knowledge. Listen to how to Money on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Amy Brown]

Have you ever wondered, if your pet is lying to you, why is my cat not here? And I go in and she's eating my lunch. Or if hypnotism is real, you will use the suggestion in enhance your cognitive controls. But what's inside a black hole?

[Kat]

Black holes could be a consequence of the way that we understand the universe.

[Amy Brown]

Well, we have answers for you in the new iHeart original podcast, Science Stuff. Join me or Hitcham as we answer questions about animals, space, our brains and our bodies. So give yourself permission to be a science geek and listen to science stuff on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcast.