FEELING THINGS: Does the Process Know We’re Trusting It? (3 Things That’ll Help You Keep Going)

Summary

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Podcast Summary: "FEELING THINGS: Does the Process Know We’re Trusting It? (3 Things That’ll Help You Keep Going)"

The Bobby Bones Show / Feeling Things with Amy & Kat

Date: January 25, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this episode of "Feeling Things," co-hosts Amy and Kat dive deep into the anxieties of waiting, the mystery behind "trusting the process," and everyday strategies to keep moving forward through uncertainty. Using their own friendship mishaps, therapy revelations, and a blend of humor and vulnerability, they explore how to cope with anticipatory anxiety, make peace with not having all the answers, and the importance of taking things step by step. Listeners also get practical advice—“three things to help you keep going”—and a dose of camaraderie in navigating life’s messy in-betweens.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Anticipatory Anxiety & the Power of Communication

Amy and Kat’s back-and-forth centers around a simple but anxiety-inducing text message, highlighting how easily miscommunication can spiral into worry—or even relief.

• Amy texts Kat: “I have something to run by you—maybe a dinner convo”
• Kat’s reaction (03:21–06:17):
  • Feels a heavy weight, imagining worst-case scenarios
  • Compares Amy’s message to the classic “call me” text from a parent
  • Internal spiraling: “Who in our family has died?...Why can't you just text me?” (05:17, Kat)
  • Discusses practicing calmness, trust, and pausing before jumping to conclusions
• Amy’s intent:
  • Makes notes so she won’t forget, not realizing the anxiety it causes
  • Insight: “If I tell you, I’m sending you into panic mode...” (07:15, Amy)

Notable Quote:

"Maybe we need another, like, thing for this. Like, ‘Hey, I need to talk to you about something. NBD, no big deal.’”
— Kat (08:06)

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2. Trusting the Process: Does It Know We’re Trusting It?

The hosts share therapy wisdom and relatable memes about "trusting the process," poking fun at how futile it can sometimes feel.

• Amy’s Therapy Revelation (10:19–11:53):
  • Discusses the popular meme: “Does the process know we are trusting it?”
  • Talks about working through fear with her therapist, eventually accessing “a little clarity”
  • Her therapist notes Amy often “works her way from fear to wisdom”
  • Suggestion: pause, reflect, let wisdom surface
• “Play the Tape Through” (12:01–13:32):
  • Kat explains a therapy tool: imagining the worst-case scenario to its end, seeing you can handle it
  • Example: Facing a challenging situation by visualizing each step, ultimately realizing “I got this”
• Advice on Overwhelm (13:43–14:50):
  • Break daunting tasks/goals down into bite-sized pieces: “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.”
  • Ask: “What’s the next right thing I can do today or this minute?”

Notable Quotes:

"Does the process even know we’re trusting it?"
— Amy (10:51)

"How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time."
— Kat (14:31)

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3. Three Things That Help You Keep Going

Practical steps discussed to help when you’re in the thick of uncertainty or self-doubt:

1. Break It Down:

   • Focus on the next right step—by week, day, hour, or even minute
   • “Some people might need to go down to the minute. That’s okay.” (15:01, Kat)

2. Small Wins Matter:

   • Practice tackling little tasks you’ve been putting off (e.g., sending an email)
   • Build confidence and prove to your brain that you’re capable
   • “Every time you do a little thing you’ve been putting off, you’re giving your brain a gift.” (15:04, Amy)

3. Borrow Hope:

   • When your own hope or confidence is low, lean on others’ stories or encouragement
   • Kat shares how hearing about others moving on from heartbreak gave her hope after a breakup (23:53–25:00)

Notable Quote:

"Sometimes you may need to borrow hope from someone else...I might, if I don’t have that hope in the moment, borrow it from you."
— Amy (19:32–20:26)

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4. Capability, All-or-Nothing Thinking & Accepting Help

The hosts reflect on their struggle with self-doubt and the myth of self-sufficiency.

• Kat’s Story:
  • Embarrassed not knowing how to create an Excel doc for taxes
  • Father-in-law’s advice: “That’s okay, I don’t know anything about being a therapist. That’s why you’re a therapist and I’m a tax accountant.” (18:40, Kat)
  • Lesson: Needing help doesn’t mean you’re not capable
• Amy’s Reflection:
  • Realizing her fear often stems from old stories and that, in reality, she’s done plenty: buying a house, raising kids etc. (16:41–17:14)

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5. Letting Go of Control & Moving Forward Without Clarity

Both hosts emphasize the challenge and importance of acting without knowing the full path.

• Amy’s Therapy Nugget (30:20–31:55):
  • “You have to keep moving forward without clarity…sometimes you have to borrow someone else’s hope, but you just do the next right thing.”
  • Uses “creative solution goggles” instead of “fear goggles” to see problems differently (32:27–34:03)
  • Gabby Bernstein’s mantra: “I’m open to creative solutions.”
  • Sometimes, solutions show up disguised as ordinary opportunities (“the Lord sent a boat and a helicopter” story, 33:30)

Notable Quote:

"You have to move forward to the next right thing, the next right step, without full clarity of what’s ahead."
— Amy (30:53)

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6. On Acronyms, Community, and Borrowing Joy

They lighten things up by discussing their own “Feeling Things” dictionary of acronyms (e.g., NBD, ETO, CSG, FGS, LGs, WTW), misadventures with Facebook groups, and the power of shared moments—even in heartbreak or nostalgia for high school days (35:44–61:27).

• Practical Example:
  • Kat’s saga trying to join a neighborhood Facebook group, using small steps as a metaphor for life
  • Amy calling out the importance of “intentional action” even when results aren’t guaranteed

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7. Therapy, Parenting, and Processing the Past

Vulnerability surfaces as Amy talks about childhood, fear of not being capable, and “passive parenting.” They reflect on how upbringing and boundaries shape confidence and readiness for real life (53:15–60:27).

• Amy’s Therapy Reflection:
  • Addressing feelings about her dad: “I think, in that moment…being a parent now, I was taking on humility…he didn’t really want me to know how hard things were.” (52:09–53:15)
  • Recognizes that not having responsibility (gas card, bills, etc.) may have affected her ability to handle adulthood stresses
• Kat’s Insight:
  • Sometimes what we think is helping our kids may actually hold them back—need for boundaries, consequences, work ethic (56:54–58:12)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |-----------|--------------------| | 03:21–06:17 | Anxiety from mysterious “we need to talk” texts; fears and assumptions | | 10:19–11:53 | “Trusting the process”—therapy revelations, memes, and moving away from fear | | 12:01–13:32 | “Play the tape through” as a cognitive tool for anxiety and decision-making | | 13:43–14:50 | Bite-sized steps and the “elephant” proverb | | 15:04–16:41 | Small wins, building capability, data vs. story | | 19:32–20:26 | “Borrowing hope” from others | | 23:53–25:00 | Using others’ stories to get through tough times (breakup example) | | 30:20–31:55 | Moving forward without clarity, “borrowed hope” revisited | | 32:27–34:03 | “Creative solution goggles” vs. “fear goggles”; embracing new perspectives | | 35:44–36:43 | The “Feeling Things” dictionary & acronyms | | 52:09–53:15 | Deep therapy moment—processing parental humility, memories, and lessons | | 56:54–58:12 | Reflection on passive vs. active parenting and its impact |

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Memorable Quotes

• "Does the process even know we’re trusting it?"
  — Amy (10:51)

• "Maybe we need another, like, thing for this. Like, ‘Hey, I need to talk to you about something. NBD, no big deal.’"
  — Kat (08:06)

• "How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time."
  — Kat (14:31)

• "Sometimes you may need to borrow hope from someone else."
  — Amy (19:32)

• "You have to move forward to the next right thing, the next right step, without full clarity of what’s ahead."
  — Amy (30:53)

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Tone & Style

Conversational, funny, confessional, and honest. Amy and Kat freely share both wisdom and insecurities, leveraging humor (“creative solution goggles!” “fear goggles!”), personal anecdotes, and practical advice that feels genuinely accessible. Their rapport is warm and supportive—a model of friendship where vulnerability and encouragement go hand in hand.

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Final Takeaways

• Anticipatory anxiety is normal, but you can manage it by communicating clearly and not assuming the worst.
• Trusting the process is both a leap of faith and a series of small actions—focus on the next step, not the whole path.
• You don’t have to do it all alone—borrowing hope or assistance doesn’t make you less capable.
• Breaking big problems into next-right-steps keeps overwhelm at bay.
• Changing your lens (i.e., creative solutions instead of fear) can unlock new opportunities.
• Letting go of control and moving forward without certainty is hard but often necessary.
• Self-compassion, community, and humor are invaluable companions in the journey.

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For anyone feeling bogged down by uncertainty or self-doubt, Amy and Kat offer both a practical roadmap and a reminder: the process may not "know" you’re trusting it, but you can still keep going—one tiny step, or borrowed hope, at a time.

Transcript

[Kat]

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[Amy]

This is US Olympic gold medalist Tara.

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[Kat]

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[Amy]

1, 2, 3.

[Kat]

If you ever have feelings and you just want some, maybe a cat got you covered like a num brother. Ladies and fellas, we just follow in.

[Amy]

The spirit where it tell us from the real stuff to the chill stuff and the in between. Sometimes the best thing you can do.

[Kat]

Is just stop and feel things. This is Feeling Things Things with Amy and Kat.

[Amy]

Happy Tuesday. Welcome to Feeling Things. I'm Amy.

[Kat]

And I'm Kat. And I'm starting with the feeling of the day because I'm feeling so relieved right now.

[Amy]

Tell us more.

[Kat]

And this has a lot to do with you. Has everything to do with you, really, because a weight has been lifted off of my chest, and I think this. There's probably something deeper going on that I probably should work through with my own therapist. But yesterday you sent me a text that said something to discuss with you tomorrow when you come over, or maybe a dinner conversation.

[Amy]

Oh, okay. Okay. Yes. Now I know what you're talking about. And you don't like messages like that.

[Kat]

So you sent me that. And I think I was trying to be cool because you've done this before. I don't know if you've noticed this, but, like, you've done this before where you said, like, I want to talk about X. And I'm like, oh, okay, let's talk about it. But it's in your head. It's probably not that big of a deal, but, like, I don't know what you're gonna say about it, so I need to know. So I was trying to practice, like, coolness and calmness and trust and all the things. So I just was like, okay. And then later, I think I said, so what do you need to oh. Because then later you sent me something else. And I said, oh, is that what you needed to discuss? And you were like, no, no. And I was like, okay, well, you're giving me anxiety. What is it? And you didn't answer me. You left me, like, you left me hanging. And I was like, shoot, Oh, I.

[Amy]

Had a dizzy phone call day yesterday, which I'm sorry about that. But now I know why your feeling is. Your feeling of the day is you're probably feeling relief, right? It's relieved Did I not even say my feeling is. I don't know if you did. I only know because I read relieved, but I didn't know what you were relieved about. Okay, you said it. I. Now I was getting nervous at, like, what I had done to you because I was like, wait a second, what did I do? But now I know you're relieved because I finally told you what it was, and you realize it's not that big of a deal.

[Kat]

Yes, but listen to the text that I sent you. And this is just, like, to me, it reminds me of when my mom will send a text and be like, call me. And I'm like, who in our family has died? Or who had a heart attack? Because why wouldn't you just text me something? Or, why can't you call me? You know? It's like, I can't sit there and then, like, go have a session with a client. Like, I need to know.

[Amy]

So, like, share with us, worst case scenario, what you thought I needed to.

[Kat]

Talk to you about. Well, I'm trying to find. Oh, you said I have something to run by you. Oh, perhaps a dinner convo tomorrow. Or tomorrow I will see you, or tomorrow when I see you when we record. I don't know what it was, but I was thinking, like, it either could be, like, something really exciting, or it's like, we need to talk about something. But then when you said dinner, I was like, okay, well, like, it can't be anything too personal or bad.

[Amy]

Like, I was.

[Kat]

That's.

[Amy]

I was thinking, you know, is a scenario. Oh, is something not going well with the podcast?

[Kat]

Yes, that was my initial. But then I was like, no, Catherine. Like, it can't be that, because that's not dinner. Cabo. She would, like, have a conversation with you about that.

[Amy]

You talk to yourself. Full name when you talk to yourself. Yes, Catherine. Catherine Elizabeth. Brittany.

[Kat]

Yes, Catherine. Mary Elizabeth. Frank. Francis. Sally. Brittany Defata Van Buren. So then I said, what are you wanting to discuss? This is giving me anxiety. And you just go on talking about whatever else. You didn't. You just didn't. I think you didn't probably see that because we were talking about something else at the same time. And I think you were on the phone, and then. And then you. And then you were talking to me about something else. And I go, okay, is this what you ha. We have to talk about? And you just go, no. Lol.

[Amy]

Yeah, Because I'm like, why would I make a big deal to talk about that? Which I wasn't trying to make a big deal first of all.

[Kat]

Well, you didn't. I did. Okay. Thank you.

[Amy]

I was. I do this a lot where I try to just make little notes so I don't forget. So I feel like if I tell you, we won't forget. But now I know if I tell you, I'm sending you into panic mode and you're going, worst case scenario, and you're like, I need to know. Don't do this to me. So I'll work on that. But I'll even text myself or email myself little notes of like, you know, just so I don't forget. So that my. That was my way of saying, hey, I want to talk to you about something, but not right now.

[Kat]

Okay, but if your boyfriend sent you a text and was like, I know we're not dating, but, like, if your boyfriend sent you a text was like, I have something I need to talk to you about tomorrow. What do you mean?

[Amy]

My boyfriend status to you?

[Kat]

What?

[Amy]

And my boyfriend status to you.

[Kat]

I'm just like, that's like the typical, like, hey, we need to talk. So maybe we need another, like, thing for this. Like, hey, I need to talk to you about something. Nbd. No big deal.

[Amy]

Oh, nbd.

[Kat]

Because in your head, again, it wasn't a big deal. So when I keep asking you about it, you didn't respond.

[Amy]

To be fair, what I ended up sharing with you was sort of a big deal, but not in like, a big deal like, you need to know about it. But it was everything okay. Everything was okay. It was special. I wanted to share with you a revelation I had in therapy and you being a therapist, I thought you would appreciate it because my therapist helped me work through something. And I'm like, I felt so much better after my session that I wanted to let you know that after clients have sessions with you, there's probably so many times where they're walking out of your office and they're like, I feel so much better. And I wanted to share with you what. What a joy it is to have a job like that where you're like, really helping people.

[Kat]

Yeah. Which was actually so sweet for that.

[Amy]

Now you're like, oh, I'm relieved. You were just wanting to of compliment me. And I do see how, though I caused some. That's why I thought it would be okay to talk about at dinner because I would, like it would have been if we were with, you know, my boyfriend and your husband and we're out to eat and I were to say, like, you know, Kat, just thinking about your line of Work and what you get to do every day. I just wanted you to know you're making an impact because I'm sure my therapist probably just hung up from our.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

Video call and was like, okay, yeah, did my job today. But like, no, really, she, like, did her job. She showed up and to her it was just. She's doing what she's trained to do. But for me, it was big. So I wanted you to know that. So you are feeling relieved.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

That we're not ending the podcast.

[Kat]

Yeah. Or like anything bad. So instead of nbd, why don't we say eto? Everything's okay.

[Amy]

Okay. I'm going to send them all. I'm going to be eto, mvd, all good. Everything is fine. But I think about this later, but not like a big deal later, just sort of. Which is something that I want to talk to you about, but I don't want to forget. But I want to talk about right now.

[Kat]

I think that this is probably more something I need to work on. It's like I'm jumping to, like, conclusions. Why am I so on edge?

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

That, like, I. That there could have been so many scenarios my brain made up, but I made up this, like, worst case scenarios.

[Amy]

I saw so many memes that were very fitting to my therapy appointment yesterday. I guess once one popped up in my algorithm, like, other videos were popping up of like, you know, trust the process is a common saying. I feel like been saying it a lot lately myself. Trust the process. Trust the process. And have you seen the memes where it's like, does the process know we are trusting it? And to me it's so funny. And yeah, it's like, hello, I am trusting you, process.

[Kat]

Why are you being so crazy?

[Amy]

Are you aware?

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

Because you're acting like you don't know this, that we're over here trying to trust you.

[Kat]

Yeah. Did you talk about that in your therapy session? The meme?

[Amy]

I didn't talk about the meme, no. But when, when, when I left therapy, though, I felt like the process, like, heard me a little bit. Oh. And I was like, okay, so you.

[Kat]

In the process, are working in tandem.

[Amy]

Showed up, showed up with a little bit of. And then I showed some trust. Something that my therapist did say to me, like point blank is like, amy, a lot of times you're talking to me and you, you start off one way and sound very fearful, like I have a lot of fear. But then I work my way through it and I eventually get to the proper part that has more wisdom than fear. And, like, there's a little clarity there, and it shows I am capable. And she's like, do you realize you do that and you get there? And I'm like, so she's like, if you would just pause and take a beat, you. You probably could get there.

[Kat]

You know, they call. Yeah, they call that. And maybe this is not exactly what you're talking about, but you've heard the phrase, play the tape through.

[Amy]

No, I have not. Oh, so tell me more.

[Kat]

So that's a lot of times specifically in recovery, but, like, any type of process in therapy, we can use this. But if somebody is worried about something or if somebody is wanting to do something that they don't know is, like, it might be a little risky, we'll say play the tape all the way through. And so if you play the. For example, if it's. Somebody's working through recovery and they're like, I really want to go to this party, but I know there'll be a lot of alcohol there. So, like, I don't know, like, should I go? But, like, also, like, I really want to go because all my friends are going to be there, and I don't want to miss out on something. We'll say, like, well, let's play the tape through. What would hap. What are the steps that are going to happen? So we'll play the tape through and probably get to the point where, like, I'm not. That I'm still really early in recovery. I haven't been tempted a lot. I'm going to go to this party. People don't know that I'm in recovery, so they're going to be offering me alcohol. I'm going to want to feel cool. I'm going to drink. I'm going to have to start on day one again kind of thing. Or who knows what's going to happen? Or for you, it's like, okay, you start here with all of this fear. Once you play the tape all the way through, you're like, oh, I got this.

[Amy]

Okay.

[Kat]

Yeah, how do I. And that allows you to pause, and then how do I play the tape through and then make a decision with all the information?

[Amy]

Let me ask you this. Okay, Catherine.

[Kat]

Yes.

[Amy]

Next time you get a text message from somebody that's like, hey, I need to talk to you about something, maybe you could play the tape through.

[Kat]

Were you sitting there just thinking and waiting to say that to me?

[Amy]

I'm like, cat should play the tape through.

[Kat]

I. I should play the tape through. You see, that's why that is why therapists need to go to therapy. Because like, we have our own stuff and it's easy to dish it out, but sometimes we need to be able to sit and hear it.

[Amy]

Yeah. Well, I also kept wanting to go like big picture though too. I understand, like playing the tape through just for in the moment, but like I want to play the tape through and it be accurate. Like, I want to know what's happening. And then she brought me back to like, let's stop focusing on what the next six months look like and let's focus on what the next day looks like. Like, break it down into bite sized pieces. So that's a little nugget for if you're feeling like you're trying to trust the process, but you're like, does the process. No. Then start to take it down to bite size. Which makes me think of the proverb or question. I think it's a proverb. Is it a proverb?

[Kat]

I don't know what you're about to say.

[Amy]

How do you eat an elephant one.

[Kat]

Bite at a time.

[Amy]

That's right. Because an elephant as a whole is very overwhelming. But if you break it down and eat it one bite at a time, you'll get there eventually.

[Kat]

That's the next right thing.

[Amy]

The next right thing. So like, what's the next right thing I can do today or this minute? Like depending on how micro you need to go.

[Kat]

Right? Yeah.

[Amy]

Because it might be. You could look at it as a week if you want because maybe you got overwhelmed by the month or the year. So for you, maybe you go down to the week, but some people might need to go down to like the minute.

[Kat]

Yeah, I was gonna say hour, but minute also works.

[Amy]

And that's okay. Some tips that she walked me through and like getting there were like sometimes even just giving yourself little tasks to do to show you that you can do it. Like, what's something you've been putting off? Because there is one thing that I discuss in therapy that I have been putting off. And she was challenging. Like, why? And then she was like, could you practice doing little things that you've been putting off? Like that could build up to that, that you're exercising that muscle because like every time you read, you're giving your brain a little gift. Well, every time you do a little thing that you've been putting off, you're giving your brain a gift that makes the bigger thing. Well.

[Kat]

And it also that teaches you that you can do things.

[Amy]

Yeah. So like, is there an email you've been putting Off. And it's really not that big of a deal, like, but, you know, you need to send the email. Sit down and get out your computer and make yourself send that email. And then you're like, all right, I sent an email. I sent an email. Yeah. Or whatever that next right thing you can do. So she was showing me, and then she also brought up a little bit of stuff you've talked about before, about the data and the story. Like, we've got the facts and we've got the stories. And she's like, also, what I want you to notice when you're doing my. When I was playing the tape back and I was getting there, and she's like, you're showing you're capable. And then also look at your life. You have this fear about something. Sure, it's coming up from childhood or this and that, but you look at. You look at your life where you are. You pay bills. Like, you have a job. Like, you have children, you have a home, you have a car.

[Kat]

You. You're capable.

[Amy]

I am capable.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

Like, these things that, like, just freak me out. And she's like, so when. Even when I got home from work today, before we were going to record, I was doing the Bobby Bones show at the studio, and I got home from work today, and I was pulling up to my house, and I was like, this is my house. Like, I bought this. And I was like, granted, it took a realtor who knew what she was doing. And, you know.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

But you.

[Kat]

And you decorated it and the lone people that do.

[Amy]

But you need. And then that showed me, like, thank you, Lord, for the experts along the way that helped guide me. Like, I didn't have to do it alone, but yet also, I did it.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

And I need to remember that because I guess my big story that pops up a lot, and no matter what area is that I'm not capable. So. And I feel like there's times where I've overcome it and then it will rear its ugly little head.

[Kat]

Well, I think also that what's coming up for me is when it comes to being capable, we can get lost in the all or nothing of that, because how you were saying, like, this is my house. I bought this house. And they're like, well, I needed a realtor. Well, yeah, but. Doesn't mean you weren't capable. And I think I do this, too, where I'm like, I can be really hard on myself for not knowing how to do something and then therefore putting it off because it's overwhelming or needing extra Help with something. And you know, I love to do things on my own. Like no matter what it is, whether it's a home project or whatever, I'm like, I can do that. My nails. I can't do that though. You can, but like I love being able to do something on my own. And something that I will always remember is when I, um, started having my father in law do my taxes because he's a tax accountant, which was a risk because we weren't married. And I was like, I'll let this guy see my finances. I got really embarrassed because he was asking me questions and I was like, I don't know what you're asking me. And I used to keep track of all my finances for work on a like a word doc.

[Amy]

Well, that's okay. I thought you were going to say a napkin.

[Kat]

No, on like a word doc. So I would just like always write everything out. And so like I sent that to him and he was like, I can't use this. Don't you have Excel? And I was like, I don't really know how to use that. So Patrick helped me put it all in Excel because it he word docs, you can't like do control all, all the things and whatever. Yeah. So I sent it to him Excel. And I was like, I'm sorry, like I don't know anything about taxes. And he goes, that's okay. I don't know anything about being a therapist. That's why you're a therapist and I'm a tax accountant. And I was like, thank you. Like, that doesn't mean I'm not capable. It's that to do my taxes, I am capable, but I need an expert to help me with that.

[Amy]

Right.

[Kat]

I don't have to do everything on my own. I don't have to be all knowing.

[Amy]

Yeah, I love that. That's what I mean too about the, the realtor part is like, I thank you for people that came in and also that I could trust. I mean there's some people that work with realtors or lenders that screw them over. So I was able to do it and I was able to find people to trust. And something else that like fits in the vein of like, okay, one minute at a time, one hour at a time, one day at a time is sometimes you may need to borrow hope from someone else and like simply knowing that your friends believe in you. Because like I know if I were to call you or cryo cat or whoever, like and have a conversation, you would encourage me and motivate me. And so I might, if I don't have that hope for myself in the moment, I can maybe borrow it from you or hear one of your stories and then be inspired by that story. And so sometimes we might need to borrow. Yeah, the hope to get us to the next day.

[Kat]

You want to know something? It's kind of depressing, but like a similar vein, it was very helpful to me. So it's not that depressing.

[Amy]

Foreign. If the holidays left you feeling maxed out, well, you don't need a reinvention, you need a reset. PURA's well being collection helps you shape the feeling of your space with Premium Smart Home Fragrance. Choose by mood, set it on a schedule and find your flow in fragrance. This is your daily rhythm reimagined with a scent. Explore moods and find your new [e-mail] moods that's pura.com moods to learn more about the Pura Wellbeing Collection. Pura.com moods this is Bowen Yang from.

[Bowen Yang]

Lost Culture Research with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. We all know the feeling when life gets really busy. Taking care of yourself can feel impossible. That's why Premier Protein shakes are my go to. They have 30 grams of protein, 160 calories, no added sugar and they taste amazing. So they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make. It's not just for fitness, it's for getting after life. The 30 grams of protein gives you the fuel you need. It's not just for intense gym sessions, it's just for life. With the wide variety of flavors from cafe latte to cake batter, it never feels boring. There's a flavor for everyone. I personally love the peaches and cream, but maybe you're a root beer floater cinnamon roll kind of person. Premier Protein empowers me to say yes to more. Find your favorite [e-mail] that's P R E M I E R protein.com or at Amazon, Walmart and other major retailers.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

Everyone deserves to be connected. That's why T Mobile and US Cellular are joining forces. Switch to T Mobile and save up to 20% versus Verizon by getting built in benefits they leave out. Check the math@t mobile.com switch and now T mobile is in US cellular.

[Kat]

Savings.

[T-Mobile Legal]

Versus Comparable Verizon plans plus the cost of optional benefits. Plan features and taxes and fees vary. Savings with three plus lines include third line free via monthly bill credits. Credit stop if you cancel any lines. Qualifying credit required.

[Public Investing Announcer]

Support for the show comes from public, the investing platform for those who Take it seriously on public. You can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index. With AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year. You can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like EFTs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the public Public Investing Inc. Member finra SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors llc. SEC Registered Advisor Generated assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures available at public.com disclosures.

[Kat]

When I went through a really bad breakup, and if you've been through a really bad breakup, it feels like you physically feel sick. Like, the pain is not just emotional, it is like physical. And in my head, it was the first one I had ever gone through. So in my head I was like, how am I ever gonna not feel this again? Like, I don't know how to get out of this. And what I did is I looked for people who like, had gone through breakups. And then I was like, where are they now? And like, there was one specific. There was like a song. I think it was a Johnny Swim song or something like that. And it was like so sad and so depressing. Then I was like, they're married and they have children and they're happy. And so that hope was like, okay, I know people can do this. People don't stay in this forever. And it sounds so silly saying it now because I'm like, it feels like, duh. Heartbreak doesn't kill people. Technically.

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

But you like depression.

[Amy]

Pretty paralyzed by it.

[Kat]

Yeah. And so I used that to like, I looked for the depressing story to then see if. How they got out of it and if they did and how long it took.

[Amy]

You borrowed their story.

[Kat]

I borrowed their story. Yeah.

[Amy]

To strangers. You up?

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

And get you moving and get you out there and get on the apps.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

Download Hinge. Think about it. Without Hinge, you would not have met your husband.

[Kat]

Technically. Well, you that's not true. You would have met your boyfriend. Yeah, well, okay. Would I, though?

[Amy]

Because, you know, I had that other guy I dated from Hinge. I wouldn't have had that experience, and.

[Kat]

That brought us a lot of joy.

[Amy]

That did bring us a lot of joy. He was.

[Kat]

He was cool. Yeah, he was.

[Amy]

I still run into it and, like.

[Kat]

He maybe, like, you brought him to my rehearsal dinner. Like, who knows? If he wasn't there, maybe something else would have happened, and we don't know if, like, it would have been the same, you know?

[Amy]

Do you remember the speech I gave at your rehearsal today?

[Kat]

It was so good.

[Amy]

It's pretty perfect because y' all met on Hinge, and so I was like, so it's only appropriate that I bring a guy I met on Hinge. And this is our second date, and our first date was only like, a one hour drink thing. Like, we met for a cocktail for one hour.

[Kat]

Yeah, but I really wanted you to bring him. Yeah, you did also, like, what a good sport for him. Got me to that.

[Amy]

Yeah. I thought, this is gonna be so fun. I'm gonna end up marrying the guy that I brought to Cats, and then.

[Kat]

I can give that speech at your rehearsal.

[Amy]

Yeah, I know. I really. I mean, not that I really thought we were gonna get married, but, you know, what if. And then I had taken a trip with him. Well, we went to the US Open. So anyway, not that this. Any of this matters. Like, I don't even know why we're going down this memory lane, but we were with another couple and they were taking pictures, and, like, we weren't, like, together together, so. But also, I was like, do we take a picture? And then. So we took pictures of them. And then I remember I looked at him. I was like, should you take a pic, like, just in case? Like, just in case we end up together? Together?

[Kat]

Did you say that?

[Amy]

Yes. So I have a picture of us, like, on that rock. You know, the rock in New York we take. We have a picture together. You know, the Rock.

[Kat]

Yes. But, like, what do you think the message is that he got when you're like, just in case?

[Amy]

Oh, come on. You think he was even thinking that deep?

[Kat]

No, you're right. He probably was like, sure, I'll take.

[Amy]

A picture just in case. What? Yeah, like, just in case we die. I don't know what he was thinking, and I don't know why I just gave him that accent. But, like, I. I just was like, should we take a pic? You know, just in case?

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

And then I Was like, here's my camera. And so now somewhere on my camera roll, I have a just in case pic. Yeah.

[Kat]

Don't get rid of it. Yeah.

[Amy]

If we ended up together then, like, yeah, we would have wanted a pick on that rock.

[Kat]

Or like, what if he becomes like super famous and you can be like, we went to New York together once.

[Amy]

Yeah. So I have that just in case.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

Super famous for what?

[Kat]

I don't know.

[Amy]

I know people go famous for all.

[Kat]

Kinds of things now. Yeah.

[Amy]

He could get a tick tock. I don't even think he has social media. Let's be honest. He was using Facebook, remember?

[Kat]

Was him? Yes.

[Amy]

I was like, not that that's bad. Any of our listeners that do it at all because like, Facebook's a thing. But like, that was his primary upload.

[Kat]

I have an update on what. I don't want to change the subject, but on the. Go for it. Okay. Facebook made me remember it. Speaking of doing one task at a time, yesterday I was on Facebook Marketplace because I'm looking for a bench for my entryway. So if you have. If you see anything, let me know. And I'm trying to patina. So I'm trying to get something used.

[Amy]

You know, the bench in my entryway. You don't. The cute. It's cute.

[Kat]

I probably do.

[Amy]

Well, I bought it on Facebook Marketplace.

[Kat]

Oh, really? Okay. I need to look at it after. I need a.

[Amy]

You never noticed anything? I'm like, hey, do you notice that? And you're like, what? Sorry, I'm just kidding.

[Kat]

I'm not observant. So I got some motivation out of I don't know where because I. Well, I went and checked to see if I made it into the Facebook group yet, my subdivision Facebook group, and I haven't. So I messaged the board of directors on Facebook.

[Amy]

Okay. So this is the next right step. Okay.

[Kat]

I don't know if they use that group anymore because the last post was from 2024. But it was like the next thing for me to be able to do. If they don't answer, then I'm going to look at who's on the board of directors and directly message them. But here's the thing. I don't look at my Facebook messages or I think they're spam, you know, so I'm afraid they're not going to.

[Amy]

Well, you're going to have to be intentional about checking your messages if you really want to be in this group.

[Kat]

No, I'm saying if they get a message from me, are they even going I'm looking to see if they answered me. Are they even going to open it? You know?

[Amy]

Oh, well, I feel like if someone's. When they're monitoring a group like that, they haven't answered.

[Kat]

I said, hi. I've been trying to join the neighborhood Facebook group since September when we moved in. Can someone help me out? Smiley face. You think that's good?

[Amy]

Have you talked to any of your neighbors that are a part of it?

[Kat]

Yes, My one neighbor that I knew before I moved in. She doesn't have Facebook, but her husband does. And she keeps saying, I need to tell my husband to send them a message. But I don't want to. I don't want to make a big deal about it because, like, yeah, be cool. I'm trying to be cool, but I've just brought it up on this podcast four times.

[Amy]

Just. You're moving forward because the next thing, after borrowing someone else's story, borrow your neighbors, borrow hope that your neighbor is in the group. But, like, you're gonna still move forward without clarity. You have no idea if they're gonna accept you, but you just keep moving forward. Because that's another thing that my therapist has had to drill into me, is that a lot of times I want to know what's happening, and I've had to surrender that control. But I. You have to move forward to the next right thing, the next right step, without full clarity of what's ahead.

[Kat]

What's.

[Amy]

Ben, my ex husband, and I had a good conversation today. That is a complete 180 from where I was yesterday with something we have going on, and I'm like, what? Look at us. Like, I just kept moving forward yesterday, doing the next right thing. And then the next right thing, things just started to. I don't know, am I looking at it through a different filter? Like, I put on a different set of glasses because instead of my fear goggles, instead of my fear goggles, I put on my. Like, I wanna just do the next right thing and approach this with confidence and wisdom. So, like, take the facts right. So then I put on those. There's fear goggles. And what do I want to call them?

[Kat]

I have an idea.

[Amy]

What? I feel like you said this stuff.

[Kat]

Well, you've said, like, I'm open to creative solutions.

[Amy]

I feel like I forgot about that mantra.

[Kat]

Yeah, this is a. You've. You came up with a creative solution.

[Amy]

Oh, my gosh. That's from my Gabby Bernstein days.

[Kat]

Oh, really?

[Amy]

Which I'm sure a lot of people say that, but a couple of Years ago, I was listening to a lot of her stuff, and that was. Oh, I did my sister and I did her 21 day. Not meditate. Yeah, Maybe Meditation challenge, I think it was. Yeah, meditation, but manifestation, maybe. You know, I'll try it. So I forgot about that. That was such a good. Thank you for reminding me of that. Oh, good little nugget there.

[Kat]

Yeah. So your Creative Solution Goggles.

[Amy]

Yes.

[Kat]

Is that a cute enough name for you?

[Amy]

My creative solution CS, I can either put on my CSGs or my FGS.

[Kat]

Yeah, girl.

[Amy]

Yeah, girl. You know, we like an acronym. So with my CSGs today, why feel so much better? And it's like, we were able to work together as a team, and this has nothing to do with me and Ben, by the way. It's something we're having to work on together, but it's not our relationship. And I'm like, look at us. And this feels so much better. And I feel good about it, but I think if I was still wrapped up in the fear and not seeing the next right thing and also seeing good things in front of me, like, also yesterday I opened up my email and I looked at something with a different perspective where I could have been annoyed by it, but instead I said, this is a gift from the Lord. Thank you, Lord, for this opportunity. Because it's almost like, you know the cute story about the guy praying in the flood.

[Kat]

Oh, yeah.

[Amy]

For the Lord to rescue him, and then he ends up dying. And, I mean, I'm paraphrasing it just to get to the point, but he gets the pearly gates, and he's like, what's up? Like, I was praying to get saved. And Peter's like, hey, idiot. Like, we sent you a boat and a helicopter and. But you kept waving it off, being like, no, no, no, the Lord's gonna save me. And it's like, yeah, you know, you gotta have on the. The LGs.

[Kat]

What's that?

[Amy]

The Lord goggle.

[Kat]

Oh.

[Amy]

But creative solutions. I'm open to creative solutions.

[Kat]

The Lord gave you the Creative Solution goggles?

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Like, you accepted them. And this kind of reminds me of what we learned about from Courtney Cook. Shout out. That her positive attitude probably makes that food taste better. Just like you, having a different outlook allows you to see more opportunities.

[Amy]

Right. We did Google that to fact check her taste buds, because that is something that.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

Is a very good theory of yours because I think, to quote you exactly, you're like, she could eat gravel and be like, mmm, crunchy.

[Kat]

She put mayonnaise on It. But then she would eat it.

[Amy]

She squirt it with mayonnaise. Mmm, yummy. Because yeah, she overall has a very positive demeanor and I. I love that. And I'm not always going to be that way, but. Yeah, I wonder if we're in a good mood or a bad mood. Like it affecting our taste.

[Kat]

Speaking of, have you seen the videos? Won't do a whole podcast on her again. But have you seen the videos of her eating, like, showing you her pregnancy cravings?

[Amy]

I only saw one that she did with her daughter, like, which I thought was really cute because she had her daughter and she was like, hey, this is what I was craving when you were in my belly.

[Kat]

Do you remember what it was?

[Amy]

Something like popcorn dipped in something else. Dipped in something else.

[Kat]

Oh, that doesn't sound too bad. This one was like cottage cheese and pork rinds. Oh, in some kind of sauce. Maybe it was mayonnaise. Like, you must have been in a really good. You were having the pregnancy glow when you ate that because. What. Anyway, yeah, LGs, CGs, CSGs, FGS. You know what we need is we need a feeling things dictionary that has all our acronyms.

[Amy]

Yeah, we have a lot.

[Kat]

Yeah, that's the one that I can remember.

[Amy]

This is pretty much the only one I remember.

[Kat]

Even though we just came up with wtw.

[Amy]

Oh, yeah. Wait to worry. Yeah, that's another one.

[Kat]

Okay. N, T, B. Nope. Nbd. No big deal.

[Amy]

Yeah, but that's not our. I know, but, like, we're gonna use it like sib. We literally made.

[Kat]

Yeah, we made that up. I don't put an asterisk on ones that we didn't trademark. How about that?

[Amy]

Tpt asap. I K, Y, K, N, K, O. I don't even know that one. If you know, you know. I k. Why?

[Kat]

You know what we should. Well, no, we shouldn't.

[Amy]

Yk.

[Kat]

I don't know how interesting it would be if we went through a list of all the, like, cool acronyms and if we knew what they were. Because, like, how often are you googling an acronym when your kids text you something? Something.

[Amy]

Thankfully, they don't really use tons of.

[Kat]

Like, do you know tdlr? Tldr?

[Amy]

Tldr? No, I'm trying too long.

[Kat]

Didn't read. So people will like. No, no, no, it's not. No, no, no, no. It's not bad. It's actually helpful. Like, if somebody. Why think. I don't know, if somebody writes a really long post at the end, they'll be like, T, L D R. And then they'll just give like the short version of it.

[Amy]

Oh.

[Kat]

Do you know what FWW is? F W W. F W W W. No, no, I think it's just fww for what it's worth.

[Amy]

For what? What about the I?

[Kat]

It's F. I don't think they put that in there.

[Amy]

F W, I W. Maybe.

[Kat]

Maybe some people use that, some people don't.

[Amy]

Well, they need to keep it straight if they're gonna do real acronyms. I need every letter because there's no way I'm gonna figure it out.

[Kat]

Well, our dictionary will keep the I anyway. Just a little.

[Amy]

In case you didn't know, we have an email from. I believe you say it's Zoe. Zoe.

[Kat]

How is it Zoe?

[Amy]

It's Zoe. Z O I E. If the holidays left you feeling maxed out, well, you don't need a reinvention. You need a reset. Pura's well Being collection helps you shape the feeling of your space with premium Smart home fragrance. Choose by Mood, set it on a schedule and find your flow in fragrance. This is your daily rhythm reimagined with a scent. Explore moods and find your new [e-mail] moods that's pura.com moods to learn more about the Pura well Being collection. Pura.com moods this is Bowen Yang from.

[Bowen Yang]

Lost Culturistos with Matt Rogers and Bowen Yang. We all know the feeling when life gets really busy. Taking care of yourself can feel impossible. That's why premier protein shakes are my go to. They have 30 grams of protein, 160 calories, no added sugar, and they taste amazing. So they're a healthy choice you'll actually want to make. It's not just for fitness. It's for getting after life. 30 grams of protein gives you the fuel you need. It's not just for intense gym sessions. It's just life. With the wide variety of flavors from cafe latte to cake batter, it never feels boring. It's a flavor for everyone. I personally love the peaches and cream. But maybe you're a root beer floater cinnamon roll kind of person. Premier Protein powers me to say yes to more. Find your favorite [e-mail] that's P R E M I E R protein.com or at Amazon, Walmart and other major retailers.

[T-Mobile Announcer]

Everyone deserves to be connected. That's why T Mobile and US Cellular are joining forces. Switch to T Mobile and save up to 20% versus Verizon by getting built in benefits they leave out. Check the math@t mobile.com switch and now T mobile is in US cellular stores.

[T-Mobile Legal]

Savings versus Comparable Verizon plans plus the cost of optional benefits plan features in Texas and fees vary. Savings with three plus lines include third line free via monthly bill credits. Credits stop if you cancel any lines. Qualifying credit required.

[Public Investing Announcer]

Support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On Public you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index with AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like EFTs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member finra SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors, llc SEC Registered Advisor. Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not investment recommendation or advice. Complete disclosures available at public.com disclosures.

[Kat]

Zoe Wow. And what language would that be?

[Amy]

Zoe Zo Zoe Zoe Zoe Zoe Hi Amy and Kat. I just finished listening to your episode about what you're watching and reading and I wanted to tell you that one I love Emily Henry books so you made a good choice. If you end up liking her books, I suggest you check out Ali Hazelwood, Lucy Score and Laura Gilmore. I think you'll love her Dream harbor series. These are a few of my favorites. 2. You said in your four books said that one of them is called you and me on Vacation. I just wanted to let you know that that's actually the same book as People would meet on Vacation. They just changed the name for publishing in different countries. So if you don't want to read it since you've already seen the movie, you can skip that one. Enjoy your reading. And I was like oh dang, I thought it was going to be a sequel or even a prequel or something. I don't know.

[Kat]

You really only got three books?

[Amy]

I only got three books. Well, I mean I can give the fourth away to somebody else that maybe wants to read it.

[Kat]

That's nice.

[Amy]

And then it. She was like, depending on which country it's for, I'm like, did I order them in English?

[Kat]

Wait, yeah, because why would they change the English name on the English book if they change the other?

[Amy]

I don't know. But then, you know, you were like, hey, what's the link that you got the four pack on? And then I went to it, and it was like, no longer unavail. No longer available. Like, I bought the last four pack, I guess.

[Kat]

So. What link did you give me?

[Amy]

I gave you the link, but there's. You can't buy anything from it.

[Kat]

Oh, I linked that in our newsletter.

[Amy]

I know. I realized that after I was like, oh, my gosh. Yeah, no, I didn't. It's something I noticed right away. But then I noticed, like, oh, you can't even buy it. Like, I must have bought the last one. Which then makes me think, like, did I really get books?

[Kat]

Have they come yet?

[Amy]

Or they're like, finally, someone bought that four pack.

[Kat]

Wait, has it come yet?

[Amy]

Yeah, they've come.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy]

But they're still wrapped in their plastic because I haven't opened them yet because I'm reading the Nightingale.

[Kat]

Oh, yeah, keep that wrapped.

[Amy]

Pretty much done with that. And then once I finish the Nightingale, which is so good, I'm moving on to my other three books from Emily, Henry. And then thanks to Zoe here, I gotta check out Ally, Lucy, and Lori.

[Kat]

Okay, so also, I wonder if that sold out right after the movie came out, because then people were probably buying it.

[Amy]

Oh, good point. Not, because I certainly got scammed. Yeah, like you got scammed for the Weetabix.

[Kat]

Oh, my gosh. Can we talk about that? Sure.

[Amy]

So somebody. Can I tell you I Can I tell you something right now?

[Kat]

Nbd now.

[Amy]

Can I tell it to you right now so you don't have to be anxious about it? And it's really not that big of a deal. But, like, I don't like.

[Kat]

I know what you're gonna say. I know what you're gonna say. You don't like when I asked for permission to talk about things because you want it to feel like I can talk about whatever I want. That right there was more like, girl, can we talk about that? Like, girl talk, you know?

[Amy]

Well, I thought we were going back to our old ways. And, like, during the fifth thing, when it was like my podcast, and then you would be coming on as a guest, so somet you'd be like, ooh, can we talk about this? But then when we joined forces, and became one podcast together. Sometimes you would still ask that, and I'll be like, stop. Like you. It's just as much yours as it is mine, so take it wherever you want, girl. If you want to talk about weed a bit, go for it.

[Kat]

But also, here's my thought, too, because I do listen to podcasts that have, like, multiple co hosts. And something that does grind my gears is when a host is telling a story and then the other host, like, hi. Or even when they're just interviewing when somebody hijack Jack something. And then, like, you lose track of where you're going because I interrupt you and I go over on a tangent. Okay? So sometimes when I ask for permission, it's because, like, I don't. I have adhd, and I can't just let you finish. And I want to make sure I'm not derailing you because you might have. You might be going somewhere, you know.

[Amy]

Oh, that makes sense. So you're being considerate and.

[Kat]

Yeah, it's not always like, am I allowed to talk?

[Amy]

Then my gears were grinding and I was like, I gotta tell you something right now. Stop asking me that.

[Kat]

But that was more like, we have to talk about this. Like, girl, can we talk about that? Because we posted that weed a big video, and we said, like, I think in the video you were like, yeah, you paid 14.99 for this. Which I did. And then somebody commented that you can buy it for 5.49 at Aldi. Aldi. How do you say it? And then somebody else said they got it for $5 on Amazon. So I went and looked and I checked. I did pay 14.99 more than. So 15 something with tax in that same link. Same exact link then was, like, on sale for 547. I paid three times as much. And then there's this fancy button that Amazon has now where you can, like, click it and a little chat bot will come up and explain to you the price history. And it said that Weedabix can be anywhere from, like, $15 to $5 average of.

[Amy]

For the same ounces.

[Kat]

It's the same box. Yeah. Yeah. Isn't that weird? And I. I imagine it's the demand. So I must have bought it at a hot time. Hot.

[Amy]

Like, you must have bought it when. Oh, my boyfriend's calling.

[Kat]

Oh, hey, do you want.

[Amy]

Can I answer it?

[Kat]

No, I'm talking about Weed of X. No, you can answer it.

[Amy]

No. What am I gonna say?

[Kat]

Like, sometimes he says funny things.

[Amy]

Oh, I just rejected him.

[Kat]

Okay. I wish my husband would call Me? He's never at work.

[Amy]

Y' all don't call each other at work, though. That's the thing.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy]

That's like, the. Which. There are. There's almost like there's two types of people in the world. Those that, like, talk while they're at work, and those that just don't. And Alex and I will call each other multiple times during the workday.

[Kat]

What?

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Does he not like, at an office?

[Amy]

He has an office he likes. Does he go to an office, or.

[Kat]

Is he, like, calling you when he's on his way somewhere?

[Amy]

He has a standup desk. Because sometimes I FaceTime him and he's.

[Kat]

Standing up, and he can talk to you on the phone while he's at work, and nobody's like, why aren't you working?

[Amy]

He's the boss. Okay, that's true.

[Kat]

That's true. I think that's a different.

[Amy]

I mean, there's not other. So the way his company works. Like, yes, he's CEO, but there are other. There's a company that owns their company and that. So technically, that guy's in the building, too. So technically, he answers to those guys. But, like, in his office, he's. I mean, but.

[Kat]

Okay, I know that. We know this. When you just said that your boyfriend is the CEO, like, do you get to go to the company Christmas party and be like, I'm with the CEO?

[Amy]

No, his company Christmas party was in New York, and I was like, well, oh, am I gonna go? Because I would love to go to New York. Well, first of all, it was on a weeknight, and I have work, so I couldn't go anyway. But he's like, also, it's not plus one. So I was like, what? Yeah.

[Kat]

What kind of Christmas party is that?

[Amy]

That's what I said. Lame. Oh, yeah.

[Kat]

Patrick's isn't either.

[Amy]

They just do it. Like, it's like after work, and everybody gets together, and it's the whole thing. And I'm like, but, I mean, you flew from Nashville to go to this party.

[Kat]

Wait, that's actually Patrick's companies, too. Like, they have, I think, office in New York or somewhere where people will all come down for the party. And it's just like, one night after work and we're not invited. But for some reason, I'm like, if you're the CEO, then you can bring your. Whoever you want.

[Amy]

Yeah, but then at that party in New York, there's the. It's almost like. It's almost like he's head of some parts, but then when he's There. There's people that are bigger fish.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy]

You know, so cool.

[Kat]

You're. That's cool.

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

That's really cool. So that's why he can call you during the day.

[Amy]

I guess so.

[Kat]

So I've actually tested the waters because I'm like, I want to talk to him. I would. I don't like going 10 hours without talking to my husband. And so I've called him before, and he's just like, what do you. Do you need something? Like, it's like he's. He thinks that there's, like, a. Obviously there's an emergency. That's why she's calling me. So I don't want to scare him anymore.

[Amy]

Right. So, yeah, he's starting to be like, who died?

[Kat]

Literally, I'm doing to him, and I don't want people to do. Right. But also now, this has actually been really tough for us. It's been tough for me. I don't think it's been tough for him. So his office is getting a new office. So for the next couple weeks, he's working from home. And for the past couple weeks, so I'm home, and he's home, but I can't talk to him because he's working. Because he's working. One time, I tried to give him a glass of water, and I walked in on a call, and I think I embarrassed him. You're right. Wait a second. Who cares?

[Amy]

Right? Did they see you?

[Kat]

Well, I was in my robe, and, like, had, like, my retainer in, and, like, I had, like, dry shampoo. Yeah. Okay. But I opened the door. I cracked the door, and I was like, hi. And he was like. He, like, threw his, like, headphones off. He was like, I'm on a call. Like, I startled him. I think he was like, I don't want you to interrupt me. So we're gonna have to figure out a code of, like, when can I. We need a. Like, a light on the door. Like, we know when somebody's recording, like, on air. Yeah. Yes.

[Amy]

Like. Like, I'm on a call. On a call.

[Kat]

Yes.

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Yes. Speaking of, did you used to have, like, the beads hanging down from your door when you were.

[Amy]

Of course.

[Kat]

Okay.

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Did you ever have a doorbell on your room?

[Amy]

No.

[Kat]

I had that, too. Yeah.

[Amy]

Did your dad install a doorbell?

[Kat]

Well, it was like a. I mean.

[Amy]

He'S a builder, so like, that would be really cool.

[Kat]

No, my dad didn't install a doorbell. But you do know he took my door off the hinges?

[Amy]

I do know that. Yeah.

[Kat]

No, it was like, you know those, like, closet lights that, like, just stick to the wall?

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

It was like that vibe, but it made a sound.

[Amy]

Cute.

[Kat]

Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, that just needed to come out of my brain.

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

Should we get back to the reason? Thank you.

[Amy]

No, I mean, we. I just had the email and I was thankful for that. And then that took us on the Weetabix and then you're. But honestly, once I moved on to the email, like, I was done with my therapy revelations from yesterday when. Because I was like, does the process even know we're trusting it? And now I know. It doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't. It doesn't need.

[Kat]

It doesn't need you.

[Amy]

Exactly. You still have to trust the process. You have to do the next right thing. What's the next teeny tiny step? You have to borrow hope wherever you can get it. And then you don't have to know the full picture. You have to move forward without clarity.

[Kat]

I think that's the hardest one.

[Amy]

Those are the three things of trusting the process or, like, trusting that you can trust the process, but you have. You can't just, like, trust the process.

[Kat]

You have to trust that you can.

[Amy]

You have to take action. And those are little things you can do.

[Kat]

Right. That's really helpful. I like that. Thank you.

[Amy]

So little nuggets.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

But anyway, therapy was so relieving.

[Kat]

You were relieved and I was released.

[Amy]

It's worth every penny. Yesterday.

[Kat]

I see. That's the dream is somebody leaves your office thinking that, like, almost like I would have paid double. Would you go that far? You're like, I already paid a lot.

[Amy]

I guess. I mean, I suppose I might. Because we had some good revelations. Like, I even. I haven't teared up in therapy in a while. And I got choked up.

[Kat]

Here's a question.

[Amy]

But it had to do with my dad, so.

[Kat]

And.

[Amy]

And I remember she was like, stay with that. Stay with that. She's like, what's the. What's coming up for you right now? Stay with it. Don't shut it down. And I was like, I think it's for my dad. And maybe just some. I was taking on what I believe to be, because it's hard to know for sure, because there was a lot I was feeling, but I think in that moment, especially being a parent now myself, like, I was taking on maybe some humility and that my dad was experiencing, like, some humble pie of sorts and his pride and how hard certain things must have been. But he didn't really let me know. And I Kind of lived in la la land. And I think that's why, too. Maybe my stepmom had resentment towards me is because she knew all the facts and, like, I didn't. And that's probably why it was annoying for her. But, I mean, I couldn't help. And then my therapist said, you can't. Your dad was choosing to make those actions. He was choosing to continue to pay for things, even if stuff was difficult for him. He didn't want you to know. So, like. And I'm like, yeah, but I would have gone and gotten a job. Like, yeah, I could go get a.

[Kat]

Job, but, like, want you to. Right?

[Amy]

But. But why? Like, he had to work so hard. That's also what just. It just, you know, what grinds my gears. It's like, it would have taught me something. Like, it would have. Yeah, I would have had. Not that I do. I have a poor work ethic, but I just think I could have done that in high school and college.

[Kat]

You didn't have a job in high school and college?

[Amy]

I mean, I was a nanny for a little bit in high school when I had part time, like, my senior year, I only had half the day. And then I was a hostess for six weeks one summer. And then in college. No, I mean, I worked at this weight loss clinic one summer. I was toxic as long I did not know. You didn't?

[Kat]

What was it?

[Amy]

Oh, my gosh. My job was to.

[Kat]

Wait, that's not funny. But, like, also, like, yeah, it is.

[Amy]

It is a little bit. Because, like, I should not. Like, I had an eating disorder.

[Kat]

Right.

[Amy]

Like, I shouldn't have been currently.

[Kat]

You did when you were working there.

[Amy]

No, Like, I did when I was working there.

[Kat]

Yes. Like, not now. Wait.

[Amy]

I mean, I wasn't active. Active in it, but I definitely had a problem.

[Kat]

But don't you think that's part of what drew you to go work there?

[Amy]

Probably because I thought, I'm gonna have access to all this diet knowledge. Yeah, absolutely. But, like, I was not, like, I. I wasn't qualified to talk to them about certain things. By what standards?

[Kat]

Talk to them about anything.

[Amy]

Well, correct. But I did have. Have the I part of my duties.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

I was allowed to weigh and measure them.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

And then ask them what they ate. They were supposed to come in and weigh, like, every three times a week or something. So you would ask them, okay, what did you eat the last two days? Because we would have a journal entry of what they ate the last time they came in, and they would feel like if they went up on the scale, and they'd be like, I don't know why I went up. And then I think, okay, well, let's talk about what you ate. And then I wouldn't.

[Kat]

You'd, like, consult them?

[Amy]

No, no. I just had to write it down. I wasn't consulting, but in my mind, I'm like, writing down, and I'm like, okay, menudo, like Oreos.

[Kat]

What's menudo?

[Amy]

Menudo. So we're in Texas. So in sort of like in a South Texas part is where I was. But it's a. A popular Mexican dish that is made above all parts of the cow, like, very fatty. I don't think it's a.

[Kat]

All parts. What do you mean? Like, the bones.

[Amy]

Wouldn'T be. But, like, I don't know, intestines and the liver and the.

[Kat]

Like the. What is it called? Like, the giblets or something? Is that. That's a chicken.

[Amy]

Giblets or giblets? Giblets, yeah, something like that. So I guess I'm just clarifying that sometimes it was really. A guy would be writing it down and be like, well, I know why. Maybe he didn't. But I wasn't qualified to counsel on that. I just wrote it down. And then I moved on to the next person. But, yeah, that was in college, and it probably only worked there a few months. And then I don't even know. I think it's because I was doing summer school there, because other than that, I would always go home for the summer and I didn't really work. But, you know, I had a gas card that he paid. His gas card?

[Kat]

Yeah. And you're like, I could have.

[Amy]

And it's like, that. That wasn't necessary. He should have been like, you're paying for your own gas. You're paying for your own insurance. Like, here, learn how to be an adult. And then no wonder I have a fear of, like, opening bills. Like, because I didn't really have to open bills. But then also, I knew. She said, so much of what I struggle with is, like, such. On a subconscious level.

[Kat]

It's like.

[Amy]

I knew there was also issues with my dad because I knew there were times he went bankrupt, but then he always just bounced back.

[Kat]

How?

[Amy]

Because he was the businessman. Yeah, that's just. So it was a roller coaster.

[Kat]

That's like a lesson, though, of like. Like, sometimes if this is not what you're putting down, let me know. Sometimes we think we're doing something that's really good for our kids, and then we learn humble, like, the Humble pie. Like you said, we learned. Like, it would have been better for me to have her get a job.

[Amy]

Well, that's why passive parenting is so dangerous, in my opinion. Yeah, it is. Certainly easier. Yeah, but it is.

[Kat]

What? So say passive parenting. If somebody doesn't know what that is. What do you mean by that? I'm not a parent.

[Amy]

Just. It's easier to just let things slide. Slide. You don't. You don't take the initiative to course correct or to have consequences, to have boundaries. Like, people thrive on boundaries. They're really helpful at times. I had no curfew at my dad's house. I could have parties. We could drink. Shut up.

[Kat]

Yeah, you did. I don't think I knew this. Oh, your dad was like, come over to our house and drink. It's okay.

[Amy]

Well, he would mostly be out of town, but he's like. I was like, well, I'm gonna have people over. And he knew that we drank. He just didn't want to deal with it. It was pat. Like, I'm sure he loved me.

[Kat]

That you drank. What would happen?

[Amy]

Oh, no. I was in trouble.

[Kat]

So did they not talk to each other? Of, like. Like. No.

[Amy]

I would have parties at my dad's house. And I didn't live with my dad. I lived with my mom. So sometimes I would have to leave because I had curfew at my mom's house. People would stay at my dad's house.

[Kat]

Were you, like, a party girl in high school?

[Amy]

No, I wouldn't say major. Major party girl. But I think that you were cool, though. I don't know. I didn't feel cool, probably, So I don't know what defines that. I felt very like I wanted to be.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

So. But, yeah, those are my friends. They were cool. And my best friend Andrea, she's actually coming to town next weekend, so I'm excited to see her. But there's a few of us. We all met when we were 13, and we still are friends.

[Kat]

Is she gonna meet Alex?

[Amy]

She is. Yeah. Boy. So Scott's great. Luke, when we went to the Bahamas or. No, not the Bahamas. Where'd we go? Cayman Islands. Last summer, I'm in the airport in the Caymans, and I look up and I see Luke, which he's the other. He was at all these parties, too. And I was like, luke, I hadn't seen him in years. And it's crazy to, like, see your friends from that long ago. Like, at a random airport in another country.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

So that. It's just fun.

[Kat]

Yeah. Okay, well, fun Story, you were a.

[Amy]

Bad you, and your nickname was Lil Jesus.

[Kat]

Literally, I'm the one that got uninvited to parties because there was drinking. So, like, you were the one hosting them. Would you? But what I hear in that is you would have let me come to your party even if I didn't drink.

[Amy]

Yeah.

[Kat]

I should have been friends with you.

[Amy]

I mean, I probably didn't drink that night either, because I had to drive all the way back home to my mom's house.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

And my mom and my dad didn't live near each other.

[Kat]

Yeah.

[Amy]

So it was. Oh, but I remember my one friend, one night, she, well, got busted for having the party. My mom caught me because one of my friends told her mom, hey, I'm spending the night with Amy. And she just assumed it was my mom's house, so she called my mom's landline to talk to her. You know, this is before cell phones and all that. Is Catherine there? No. She's like, no, I swear. She's spending the night with Amy. She's like, maybe she's. So my mom got in her car again. They did not look close. And my mom, the holy spirit, led her right to the door. And I got in so much trouble. She walked.

[Kat]

Showed up at the party. Yeah. Were you drinking?

[Amy]

Probably because I was staying there. Who knows? I don't know. And there was one time, Jenna Bush. I went to high school with them. And this has nothing to do with, like, drinking, but we did have a party. Yeah, no, it's not to do with drinking. Although she got busted underage drinking in the news, but we were doing a 5k the next day, and we had been up really late, and we spent the night at my dad's house. And I. We had registered and paid for the money, and I really wanted to get up and go do the 5K. And she was like, no, let's just let it go. I don't want to do it. And she was like, I'm so tired. I want to sleep. And I'm like, no, we already registered, like, duh, duh. And she was like, you're the devil. And I was like, like, what? She got up and she did it that way. Did it.

[Kat]

But did you die?

[Amy]

I think she was annoyed with me.

[Kat]

For sure, but no, but I have age. You can kind of bounce back. It's different if you did that now. I don't think that.

[Amy]

Yeah, yeah. No, I think.

[Kat]

Look at you.

[Amy]

So, like. Yeah, we were.

[Kat]

We don't condone this.

[Amy]

No. If your kids listening. No, we were stupid, but sometimes you.

[Kat]

Just need a couple.

[Amy]

Yeah. So there you are. Random jaunt down memory lane. I had no idea we would do that, but there. Here we are. Okay. Anything else? This is a very diverse episode. We talk about a lot of things and we hope wherever you are, you are having the day you need to have. Bye Bye. Wellbeing doesn't have to be a routine. Sometimes it's just feeling grounded when you walk into a room. Pura's well Being Collection makes that simple with fragrances that are intentional, fluid, restorative, balanced and smart so that your home can feel calm, cozy or refreshed right when you need it. Discover the [e-mail] moods that's pura.com moods to learn more about the Pura well Being collection. Pura.com moods this podcast is brought to you by Kleenex Lotion Tissues. You know how life has those moments that just sneak up on you? The ones that make you feel a lot, sometimes all at once? Well, cold season can be one of those moments too. It likes to take an entrance when you least expect it, but when it does, being prepared with a little comfort can make a big difference. Kleenex lotion tissues help protect, soothe and moisturize your skin so that you can take care of yourself and those around you. My nose has been randomly running so much the last couple of months, so I've been keeping Kleenex lotion tissues nearby and they have come in clutch. They're made with coconut oil and aloe. They give you that just right mix of moisturizing, care and strength that we all definitely need during cold and flu season. It's the kind of small comfort that shows up for you so that you can keep showing up for everything else. For whatever happens next, grab Kleenex.

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[Kat]

This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.