Transcript
T-Mobile Representative (0:00)
If you love your phone but not your carrier, just switch to T Mobile. You can keep your phone, keep your number and we'll help pay it off up to $800 per line. You can also use our savings calculator to compare our plans and streaming benefits against Verizon and AT&T. So switch and keep your phone, keep your number and keep more of your moolah. @t mobile.com up to 4 lines via virtual prepaid card.
TurboTax Representative (0:21)
Allow 15 days qualifying unlock device, credit.
T-Mobile Representative (0:24)
Service port in 90 plus days with device and eligible carrier and timely redemption required.
TurboTax Representative (0:27)
Card has no cash access and expires.
Bobby Bones (0:29)
In six months hey, it's Bobby Bones. Join me and former NFL quarterback Matt Castle every Wednesday for our new podcast, Lots to say with Bobby Bones and Matt Castle. Between us, we have over 17,500 passing yards, multiple New York Times bestsellers, and one mirrorball trophy from Dancing with the Star. So where else are you gonna find a show with that much athleticism and football insight? We talk sports, but we talk pop culture and music and a little bit of everything. Listen to Lots to Say with Bobby Bones and Matt Castle on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Jon Stewart (1:00)
Jon Stewart is back in the host chair at the Daily show, which means he's also back in our Ears on the Daily Show Ears Edition Podcast. Join late night legend Jon Stewart and the best news team for today's biggest headlines, exclusive extended interviews and more. Now this is a second term we can all get behind. Listen to the Daily Show Ears edition on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Bobby Bones (1:43)
Little food for your soul. Life ain't always pretty, but hey, it's pretty beautiful. Laugh a Little More Things.
TurboTax Representative (1:59)
With Amy Brown Happy Thursday. Four things Amy here and today we're talking about something that we all need to hear. Especially since we're in the beginning of a new year. At least if you're listening to this on time when it comes out. We're mid January and I want you to know this year it is okay to change. Change can be hard, it can be scary, it can bring about anxiety. But change? That is where growth happens. And if you're a people pleaser, you for sure need to listen to this. Now. The inspo for this whole topic came from a recent three Chords Therapy newsletter. Now Therapy Kat, who co hosts the Fifth Thing with Me on Tuesdays, she has her own practice here in Nashville. It's called Three Chords Therapy. She sees clients and then she has other therapists that work alongside her. They're all awesome and they take turns writing the newsletter that goes out. And this most recent one was written by Julie and I absolutely loved it. She titled the newsletter Feeling Connected and it's all about letting go of people, pleasing, allowing ourselves to change, and then just embracing a new mindset. For this year. I'm going to read it for you verbatim because, well, it's too good not to share. I'll do that in just a second and then after I read it, I'm going to share with you four things that will help validate you anytime you need to change your mind or just change in general. Okay, here's the newsletter again. It is titled Feeling Connected written by Julie Langner from Three Chords Therapy. Here's what she wrote Maren Morris ushered me out of 2024 with a song I began the year overplaying get the hell out of here. I'm not surprised. I always love a song I can pretend to live in. As a chronic people pleaser, I basked in Maren's bold and unapologetic voice on this song. I found myself clinging to her self assurance as she sang one line in My only resolution is I'm allowed to change my mind. I like to pretend I'm not a resolution gal because the psychology says it's not the way we humans create changes. However, if I let myself have one for 2025, it is this. I'm allowed to change my mind. The alternate title for this post was My New Year's resolution is to be more of a disappointment, but I feared that might unsettle some people at the time of writing this. It is still 2024, so I have 11 more days to hold tight to my people pleasing protective strategies. That is often what people pleasing is, an attachment coded response that we learn in childhood as a way to protect and maintain our most important relationships. People pleasers learn through observation and experience that conflict threatens connection and if I'm a young child dependent on my caregivers for survival, my smart little nervous system is going to learn that in order to survive I need to keep the peace and prioritize others needs. As an adult I get the chance to correct this response. Hello therapy. But nervous system habits die hard, so I'm still learning that asserting myself does not always mean disconnection. What does this have to do with changing my mind? Well, people pleasing on a very micro level for me looks like holding myself to rigid expectations that avoid inconveniencing others. When I work with clients around changing long standing protective strategies. I always like to work with the lowest hanging fruit. What's the least threatening disruption we can pull off to start? For me it's going to look like sending a lot of texts like this in 2025. So actually I changed my mind. Can we meet in east instead? I'm really craving Mitchell's Deli. Hey, I took a closer look at my schedule and I can no longer make Thursday work. So meeting via Zoom was working great for me and now I'd actually prefer to come in person. Can we arrange that? So whenever we're changing a protective strategy, it is common to feel an increase in anxiety so we want to pair it with some extra self care. After I send a text like this, I'll probably throw my phone on the couch and turn on Maren Morris if you're a chronic people pleaser, why don't you join me in changing your mind this year Julia? Alright, so that's the newsletter and I love that it's challenging us to not hold tightly to any protective strategies we have picked up along the way. Whether as a young child, as a teenager, as a young adult, different life circumstances, we pick up all kinds of strategies which might mean we end up being more of a disappointment this year if we let go of some of those strategies. But we can do all of this in a healthy way. And after I read Julia's newsletter I thought, okay, I want to sit with this for a little bit and tie it into four things by coming up with four things that make changing your mind or changing in general awesome. And the first thing that came to mind for me, especially since I've experienced a lot of change the last few years, is changes. How we grow. Whether it's learning new skills or stepping out of a comfort zone, or letting go of old habits, growth does not happen without change. And on last Thursday's four Things episode we talked about shedding things that no longer serve us. That's how we evolve. It's all about shedding what no longer fits. And we can try to make it fit and we can squeeze our way into the pants or whatever you want to use to visualize something no longer fitting and how uncomfortable that is. But sometimes we will just force it and sit in the comfort because that uncomfort we think is more comfortable than the actual uncomfort of changing. You know what I mean? You just like sort of like pick your poison. But if we pick the one that is going to help us fall in alignment with ourselves, help us lean into our more authentic selves. Yeah, it may be uncomfortable for a bit, but it's going to feel better in the long run. So if we let go of things that no longer serve us, that is how we evolve. We're shedding what no longer fits. And this includes changing our minds. Like, for example, deciding to take a different career path. Or even as small as choosing a new lunch spot. Like Julie was saying, she's like, I'm craving Mitchell's Deli now. Which, by the way, if you're ever in East Nashville, shout out Mitchell's Deli. Definitely a good sandwich spot for sure. But gosh, there's also more serious things, like ending a relationship. Any changing of the mind, big or small, can open the door to growth in ways that we never expected. I know for me, my divorce, which was never an option for a version of me that I had to shed, opened the door wide open for growth. The ways in which I have grown, like, that's a whole nother episode in itself. It's awesome. I love that change is how we grow, but sometimes we'll just stay stuck and stunted. We'd rather not grow because it's uncomfortable to Change.