Dance Gangs with Kerryn Feehan

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Bonfire with Big Jay Oakerson and Robert Kelly

Episode: Dance Gangs with Kerryn Feehan
Release Date: May 14, 2025
Hosts: Big Jay Oakerson and Bobby Kelly
Guest: Karen Feehan
Channel: SiriusXM’s Faction Talk, Channel 103

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1. Introduction and Sing-Along Banter (00:00 - 07:20)

The episode kicks off with the usual comedic rapport between Big Jay Oakerson and Bobby Kelly. They engage in a lighthearted discussion about initiating a sing-along segment, showcasing their typical playful antagonism. The hosts express mild reluctance but proceed humorously.

Notable Quotes:

• Big Jay Oakerson: “I love the idea.” (02:07)
• Christine Evans: “Well, you gotta bring something to the table if you.” (02:05)
• Big Jay Oakerson: “I would sing a Journey song.” (06:17)

2. Meatloaf Musings and Musical Comedy (07:20 - 16:35)

The conversation shifts to a humorous critique of Meatloaf, the iconic rock singer. The hosts delve into discussions about his theatrical performances, appearance versus vocal talent, and the dramatic nature of his music videos. Their playful mockery highlights Meatloaf's larger-than-life persona and exaggerated stage presence.

Key Points:

• Performance Style: Debate over Meatloaf's theatricality versus genuine musical talent.
• Music Videos: Analysis of Meatloaf's music videos and their cinematic qualities.
• Comedic Elements: Jokes about Meatloaf’s physical appearance contrasted with his musical prowess.

Notable Quotes:

• Christine Evans: “I didn’t do it for her.” (15:00)
• Big Jay Oakerson: “He really does. Paco dresses like it's Alaska every day.” (05:02)
• Bobby Kelly: “He was more theater. I mean, he would bring… it was that perfect time of rock and roll where they like.” (16:06)

3. West Side Story Remake and Dance Gangs (16:35 - 37:00)

The hosts transition to discussing the remake of the classic musical "West Side Story." They explore the portrayal of gangs, specifically the Jets and Sharks, highlighting changes in setting and ethnic representations. The conversation humorously touches on stereotypes associated with Irish and Puerto Rican dancers, emphasizing the comedic twist on traditional gang rivalries through dance.

Key Points:

• Setting Changes: From Hell’s Kitchen to Upper West Side.
• Ethnic Stereotypes: Comedic take on Irish versus Puerto Rican dancing styles.
• Character Dynamics: Fictionalized interactions between different ethnic gangs.

Notable Quotes:

• Big Jay Oakerson: “Trump's trying to dial back the clock.” (34:10)
• Christine Evans: “They love to live in America.” (37:04)
• Bobby Kelly: “The Golden days that Trump’s trying to get back to.” (34:00)

4. Dance, Musicals, and Personal Experiences (37:00 - 50:00)

In this segment, the hosts delve into their personal experiences with musicals and dance, interspersed with humor and self-deprecation. Christine shares her off-Broadway musical endeavors, while Big Jay discusses the challenges of performing and maintaining sobriety amidst the chaotic environment of shows. The dialogue highlights their love for dance and theater, albeit through a comedic lens.

Key Points:

• Christine’s Musical Background: Participation in off-Broadway productions.
• Performing Challenges: Balancing performance with personal struggles.
• Humorous Dance Commentary: Jokes about dance moves and choreography.

Notable Quotes:

• Christine Evans: “I was in an off Broadway musical already.” (41:18)
• Big Jay Oakerson: “I'm going to Monday night. Next Monday night I'm at the dojo with Aaron Berg and Joe List.” (49:40)
• Christine Evans: “I danced with a cane, so felt off Broadway to me.” (42:00)

5. Guest Appearance and Additional Banter (50:00 - 51:24)

Karen Feehan joins the conversation, adding to the dynamic with her own humorous takes. The hosts continue their playful interaction, discussing upcoming shows and promotional events. The segment maintains the show's signature blend of comedy and casual conversation.

Key Points:

• Upcoming Shows: Promotion of Karen Feehan’s specials and the hosts’ performances.
• Interactive Comedy: Continued humorous exchanges and playful teasing.
• Audience Engagement: Encouraging listeners to check out their and Karen’s events.

Notable Quotes:

• Christine Evans: “Karen's new special, Don't Serve me is out now on OnlyFans tv.” (48:50)
• Big Jay Oakerson: “You have to go storyboard your set.” (44:30)
• Christine Evans: “I'm going to Monday night I'm at the dojo with Aaron Berg and Joe List.” (49:40)

6. Closing Remarks and Advertisements (51:24 - End)

The episode concludes with standard promotional segments, highlighting deals from sponsors such as USAA Auto Insurance and McDonald's. The hosts wrap up with final comedic remarks, maintaining the engaging and humorous tone typical of "The Bonfire."

Notable Quotes:

• Christine Evans: “Tender, juicy and its own sauce. Would you look at that?” (51:45)
• Big Jay Oakerson: “New McCrispy strips now at McDonald's.” (51:51)

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Key Themes and Insights

1. Humor in Music and Dance: The hosts leverage their comedic talents to explore and parody elements of music and dance, particularly focusing on theatrical performances and dance-centric narratives like "West Side Story."

2. Cultural Stereotypes: Through satire, they address and playfully critique ethnic stereotypes associated with different dance styles and gang representations, aiming to entertain while subtly highlighting cultural nuances.

3. Personal Experiences: Sharing their backgrounds in theater and performance adds a personal touch, allowing listeners to connect with the hosts' genuine yet humorous insights into the performing arts.

4. Interactive and Dynamic Dialogue: The episode exemplifies the spontaneous and unscripted nature of "The Bonfire," with hosts engaging in free-flowing conversations that blend prepared topics with improvisational humor.

5. Promotional Interludes: As with most episodes, advertisements and promotions are interwoven seamlessly, ensuring the primary content remains focused on entertaining discussions.

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Conclusion

"Dance Gangs with Kerryn Feehan" showcases Big Jay Oakerson and Bobby Kelly's trademark comedic style, blending discussions on music, dance, and cultural narratives with personal anecdotes and playful banter. The episode offers a humorous take on iconic performances and stereotypes, all while maintaining an engaging and entertaining atmosphere for listeners.

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Note: Timestamps are approximate and correspond to the provided transcript segments.

Transcript

[Bobby Kelly]

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[Big Jay Oakerson]

Vitamin Water was born in New York because New Yorkers wanted more flavor to pair with all the amazing food in the city. You can have the best meal in.

[Christine Evans]

The world here if you can get a reservation. Vitamin Water is New York.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Its three favorite cheeses are chopped cheese, bacon, egg and cheese and a slice of cheese pizza. We know where to get the best sushi in the city and best nachos and best bagels and best. You get it. And you can find food trucks better.

[Christine Evans]

Than five star restaurants. Drink Vitamin Water. It's from New York.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And now the bonfire with Big J Okerson and Robert Kelly.

[Christine Evans]

I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend. Wish you would step back from that match, my friend. Jacob.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Jacob, take us out.

[Christine Evans]

Check out that one. Hard.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, it's not. This is a you and Christine. So you guys, Christine, first of all, Christine Lou. Christine's face, so excited. Was so, so happy. It made me happy. She loved singing this song and it made me happy. But it's not my. I mean it's not, you know, sing along, dude. It's a sing along. But it's not the song that I would sing along to.

[Christine Evans]

Song you want to sing along to?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.

[Christine Evans]

Well, you gotta bring something to the table if you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I can. But I didn't know the idea. I'm not poo pooing the idea. I love the idea.

[Christine Evans]

You poo pooed.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I love the idea. Just. The song was good with the song. The song was very.

[Christine Evans]

What would you rather start?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sophomoric. I would say it's a sophomore song.

[Christine Evans]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's a good song.

[Christine Evans]

What were you thinking?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know. Some little rocking. A little more fucking Balls to it.

[Christine Evans]

Like I was hired to be. I was a hired gun to do the drums. This guy already. He's already flaking out.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're not in the song.

[Christine Evans]

It made me happy because it made Jay happy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Made me happy because it made Christine happy.

[Christine Evans]

Right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And it made Jay happy.

[Christine Evans]

It makes me. Now I'm unhappy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, I don't want you to be.

[Christine Evans]

Play the drums.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You know what?

[Christine Evans]

What song do you want to sing? So great.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I. I don't like this.

[Christine Evans]

You've been thinking a whole bunch.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't like this passive aggressive song.

[Christine Evans]

Maybe the song will sing the. What you want to do.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Why you. Why are you song.

[Christine Evans]

You think I won't throw 110% into it?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Why are you song bullying me?

[Christine Evans]

Bullying? I'm saying what would be song and let's sing it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know. It's not a better song. I think it's a great song.

[Christine Evans]

I hate that song we just sang. I'm not gonna lie to you. I don't like the song.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Right.

[Christine Evans]

I don't leave it on because I love it all the time. It's a stupid sing along.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Right? I mean, there's another sing along. Wouldn't it be.

[Christine Evans]

Go on.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This is. I don't like your song. Aggression towards me.

[Christine Evans]

It's not aggressive at all.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What are you doing? I'm waiting for you to say the song so I can play the song. Well, don't do hand gestures like that.

[Christine Evans]

He's panicking. He's over there. It's like, I can't believe how long it's taking for you to think of one song. You don't sing along.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, what happened to your girlfriend and Lou?

[Christine Evans]

I think you know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay. Yeah. What?

[Christine Evans]

We all got the itch. She gets the itchy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She gets the itch from Lou.

[Christine Evans]

Sometimes she just has to see it and spit on it and she can go about the rest of her day.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Isn't that the way it is?

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. She has to see black Dick and just go.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did you see her? She was so happy singing that song too. Her. She was angelic.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, I didn't do it for her.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I know.

[Christine Evans]

I thought it was going to be a full room, but DJ Lou was. That was the most involved DJ Will ever win. Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm from the 90s.

[Christine Evans]

He sustained a note.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I'm from the 80s.

[Christine Evans]

70S.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right, listen, that's. You can't count that.

[Christine Evans]

Late 60s.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No. Not lazy. That was not born in the 60s. I was born 1970.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, wow.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So what? That's right.

[Christine Evans]

There's 69. Jim Morrison. Only been dead for a year.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm gonna start sending your mom on aura frames.

[Christine Evans]

She would welcome it very much. My stepfather's got a huge piece.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm gonna. I'll just enhance mine. I'll. AI. My senator.

[Christine Evans]

No, she'll like that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I'm gonna send her. I'm gonna say. Oh, the reds, the regs.

[Christine Evans]

Everybody hit the reds.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Christine Evans]

Look, he's just typing the word lyrics for. Because you haven't even said a song yet. He just. The lyrics for.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I would sing a Journey song. I would sing a Paco. Paco song.

[Christine Evans]

Why did you say that? Because Journey. Because Paco looks like lead singer.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes, I did. Yes, I did.

[Christine Evans]

Because he looks like Paco Padilla, whatever the fuck. Guy's name is Jaco Papaco.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He really does. Paco dresses like it's Alaska every day.

[Christine Evans]

He's in the elements, raining.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But you're wearing a Eskimo. Parker out.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, because he travels by Vespa with oven mitts on the handlebars to keep his hands warm.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, he's got to do ubereats in between because Louis don't pray him enough.

[Christine Evans]

Goddamn right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Hey, do you have a Vespa? No. What do you have? It's called the fly wing. Talk on the microphone, it's called a fly wing. A fly wing? Yeah, a lot of the, like, Chinese or, like, African people use a fly wing.

[Christine Evans]

No, no, I consider myself Japanese at this point. No, that's not it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're not Japanese, Jacob.

[Christine Evans]

That's not it. Go back.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You just love the culture.

[Christine Evans]

It's the third one. I'm Japanese. The Vespa.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's it? No, not even. It's way cheaper. And how much is it? I think it's like 1300. Let's buy him a new one, Jay. Nah, I got. My old one's fine. What a weird asshole you are. Who would do that?

[Christine Evans]

So humble.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What a What? A fucking bit ruiner. No, I like my old one. I mean, if you want to buy me something, well, then, now it's over. I don't want to get me anything.

[Christine Evans]

Could we.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I would. I would say Journey. Bob Seeger, maybe.

[Christine Evans]

So just name. You can't just name people.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm. I mean songs. I'm. I mean people. So. I mean, any Journey song.

[Christine Evans]

Any Journey song. That's not true.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Love it. Great song throwing.

[Christine Evans]

You think this is rock? And this was gonna get the crowd moving, Open arms. That makes sense to you?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look who's here.

[Christine Evans]

I know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look who's here.

[Christine Evans]

I'm glad you didn't see us fall apart as a unit.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look at Christine Walker in she loves you. Oh, my God. What are you saying? Get over here. Jay likes to look at you.

[Christine Evans]

Jay likes to look at you sandbagging me with our guests.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm sorry, dude. No, you do like to look at them. I mean, you like them on our side. On my side.

[Christine Evans]

No, no, I like to see the guests. Yes. You didn't say that like that. You purposefully said it like, at you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

You like to look at them. Bobby likes to finger them under the table.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, I look. You finger and touch.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I finger and touch and then I smudge.

[Christine Evans]

You touch a lot.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I smudge.

[Christine Evans]

Let's see if you. How much you touch Karen today.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I will. I'll touch Karen. I do touch, but it's more, you know, it's. I, you know, for emphasis.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. Don't feel. It's sexual. He did it to Billy Idol.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That was for sex.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. He held his wrist several times.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Did I?

[Christine Evans]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Well, he was actually trying to finger me.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, so you're trying to keep him away.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I was trying to keep him away. That dirty old man.

[Christine Evans]

Understood.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Freaky English guy.

[Christine Evans]

We have the great Karen Feehan joining us.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hey, guys.

[Christine Evans]

Thank you so much for being here.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thanks for having me.

[Christine Evans]

You came. Sometimes we start the show with a full crew. Sing along. Oh, and I said, why don't you play it again? I said, let's do Jumper by Third Eye Blind. And we did it.

[Bobby Kelly]

Wish you would step back from fun.

[Christine Evans]

Sing along. Right? Yeah. Not even a great song in the scheme, but everybody knows it, right?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yes.

[Christine Evans]

And Bobby, for the first time in our group sing alongs, Borderline Stone faced me. He.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I sang. That's not true. I sang this video of me singing. I sang the chorus, first couple parts.

[Christine Evans]

Not even by the end.

[Bobby Kelly]

By the end.

[Christine Evans]

Nothing.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sand.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Can I just. Can I.

[Christine Evans]

By the end. Nothing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

A little tub of yourself there.

[Bobby Kelly]

I weigh 114 pounds, you crackhead.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, tubby.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shut the.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Shut up. Or you little cellulite butt, go back to the gym.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's where it's supposed to be.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Not on your ass. What the was that. What was that weird Filipino cackle?

[Christine Evans]

I'm very excited.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He really shot it at work.

[Christine Evans]

Just, you know, I don't know if you're familiar with this, but Paco will do anything. So if you want to. Or piss in a cup, he'll just eat that.

[Bobby Kelly]

That Annie Letterman video lives in my mind.

[Christine Evans]

How couldn't It. How couldn't it. How couldn't it live in your mind?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, is that when.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, the Andy Letterman. Oh, you missed here. What he did was instead of Annie Letterman. Annie Letterman. One is hot in comparison to what happened in here. He drank mouthwash directly. Right directly out of Bobby's. And the second time, it was mixed with coffee out of his mouth.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, my God.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was mouthwash coffee. It's not that bad.

[Bobby Kelly]

It is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Here's the thing. I. I was like, come here, Paco. Do it. And I was like, there's no way he's going to do it.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. Bobby hesitated, ran over.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Of course I did it. And I almost felt bad and I had to commit because he thinks he's.

[Bobby Kelly]

Going to get funny via osmosis.

[Christine Evans]

Via.

[Bobby Kelly]

Via your saliva transference of fluids funny.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

If he got fatter, he turns into.

[Bobby Kelly]

A fat Filipino woman.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's how I got. That's how I lost my weight. I just spit it into his mouth.

[Bobby Kelly]

O spit.

[Christine Evans]

Well, anyway, Bobby couldn't think of a song that would be better.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I did think of a song.

[Christine Evans]

He just attacked the song I brought in.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's a good song.

[Christine Evans]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And I feel bad because I did sing it.

[Christine Evans]

You didn't.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But it wasn't the best one. I mean, he. Jay is the master of songs.

[Christine Evans]

If everybody.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He is a songstress or orange peel face.

[Christine Evans]

I'm a diva. I'm a diva.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're a diva. I'm sure you're. You're a songy guy.

[Christine Evans]

You're.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're a musical type of dude.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're the meatloaf of stand up comedy.

[Christine Evans]

Absolutely. That's why I always have a scarf in my back pocket in case I have the meatlo.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That would have been a good song. That would have been a great song. Dashboard Light. Great song.

[Christine Evans]

Love that fantastic song.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sing along song. You could have done the meatloaf. I would have done the girl part.

[Christine Evans]

Do you know that song all the way through. Are you gonna panic through your way through?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

See, now, now that's the thing that makes me sad is that you think you just threatened me.

[Christine Evans]

Threatened you?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You. That was a threat. Am I not you? You? Well, are you gonna duel me right now?

[Christine Evans]

You?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Me? I might duel you, you meatloaf. Dueling me.

[Christine Evans]

Drop us in your shoe. Duel you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Buddy, I am so sorry. You're 100, right? I should have. Let me tell you something. You came in with. With, I would say Fresca fizzy bubbles today.

[Christine Evans]

Put it on Lou.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, Much better.

[Christine Evans]

You know what?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That should Be you and Christine's wedding song.

[Christine Evans]

No, I think it should be me. And you get to perform somewhere.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah. Skank fest.

[Christine Evans]

That was beautiful.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Was it. Wasn't it a little better than the other song?

[Bobby Kelly]

I like how every meatloaf song is the exact time increment is what it takes to cook a meatloaf.

[Christine Evans]

Christine, look. He goes. And then put it back in the oven for one paradise by the Bachelor by the de.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Looked at one point, she went, we're halfway through. And I started panicking. I started sweating. We just were beautiful. It was the first 30 minutes of the show just to sing along. So we are a bunch of orange peels. We just want to be.

[Christine Evans]

Don't you say that. That was beautiful. What just happened.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was beautiful.

[Bobby Kelly]

All of his music videos were like nollas, too. They were like movies.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, well, yeah, he had the.

[Bobby Kelly]

That one.

[Christine Evans]

I would do anything for love. I like the idea that they made him like a monster face living in a cave. I know, but like, they were always Beauty and the beast when it was just him and the girl on stage. He was a big fatso. And a tuxedo.

[Bobby Kelly]

You don't need a prosthetic, dude. Ugly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I love that. He couldn't get tuxedo. You couldn't get the full tuxedo, though.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, no, dude. Those things were always split down the V. Yeah. Go. Go to an old Go paradise by Desperate live in, like, the 70s.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The other one, though, was his comeback. Correct.

[Christine Evans]

I would do anything for love as a comeback.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Comeback.

[Bobby Kelly]

That was my introduction to Meatloaf.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, because we're.

[Christine Evans]

That was most people. Yeah. No, no, no. That was my. My first thing for him was that. And then I went backwards.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Mine was the original.

[Christine Evans]

That was.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That was at my prom.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, you were born in the 60s.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I was born in the 70s, but.

[Christine Evans]

Like, right at there.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, right close.

[Christine Evans]

I mean, look at him, dude.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Citizen.

[Christine Evans]

And by the way.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You haven't met Evelyn yet.

[Christine Evans]

You'll meet her. No, she'll have to meet Evelyn for sure now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She was smoking. This girl.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, but by the way, I think he was this chick.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But I don't think she sang the original song. Did she sing this song? This girl?

[Christine Evans]

Oh, it's her. Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think.

[Christine Evans]

Get to her part.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think somebody else sang it originally. I think she. I don't. I don't know.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, she was hot, though.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Hot back for then. Now she's a four and a half.

[Christine Evans]

No. What?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look. Look at what I'm sitting next to. And then look at that. Atrocious.

[Christine Evans]

Ghoul.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you for that compliment.

[Christine Evans]

I think that was a good compliment.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was a fantastic.

[Bobby Kelly]

Thank you, baby.

[Christine Evans]

But she was cute.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Cute for what? Standing next to me. Yeah, buddy. She looks like all the sweat hogs in one.

[Bobby Kelly]

No.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, that's how she blew. Oh, Mr. Katier, let me suck your dick.

[Christine Evans]

I don't know, dude.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She has no muscle tone. Her shoulders are rounded. She's a muff.

[Bobby Kelly]

So critical.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, just. Let's do it if we're gonna do it. You all right? Oh, it's. What's happening a little bit.

[Christine Evans]

That's actually. Where's the music video?

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, I paid to get it.

[Christine Evans]

Is this the music video?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Actually, let me see. I thought that was just a live.

[Christine Evans]

This seems like a live performance, but that seems like the girl in the picture also who actually thinks it.

[Bobby Kelly]

They used to do music videos.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Somebody just texted me. That was an epic Meatloaf song, by the way.

[Christine Evans]

Who?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't. I'm not gonna say who, but somebody just was. Listener texted. What a song.

[Christine Evans]

We.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We nailed it.

[Christine Evans]

Listener has your friend.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

A friend who listens to the show. We could not investigate it.

[Christine Evans]

Rethink who the.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Take the compliments.

[Christine Evans]

Kalta. He loved it. No, he didn't.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, I'm not. He might have loved it. It's not him.

[Christine Evans]

Soda?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, it's not. So he doesn't listen to this.

[Christine Evans]

I thought he texts you what to say.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He left this.

[Christine Evans]

He sits home and texts you what to say. I thought so Does. This has been one long, impractical joke. He's been telling Bobby what to say. Somewhere just Sal and Dan are falling over each other, laughing, and I know.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You can't do a voice, but just say off. What is this?

[Christine Evans]

So this is a music video. So it's a girl lip syncing this, but that live performance is her.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So she sang it originally. That's the girl who sang it originally on the album.

[Christine Evans]

The one who's in the. In the live version. Yeah. Ellen Foley. No, she's not.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She's not what?

[Christine Evans]

Fully declined to be on the bad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She didn't be on it on the tour. Somebody else sang it. I believe that.

[Christine Evans]

No, no, no.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She was.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, she wasn't on the tour.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Christine Evans]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Christine Evans]

So then that's the girl from the video is the one that sang it on tour, but she ended up singing it, too.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is that her now?

[Christine Evans]

She looks like sings in the video, but sings it live on tour. Say again? Is that how she looks now? No, that's an old.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, she so she didn't sing it. The girl who sang it in the video wasn't her.

[Christine Evans]

No.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Right, okay. Yeah, that's what I thought. Well, when he sang it with her live, he grabbed her tits and ass a bunch, so. Oh, you saw it? Yeah, of course he did. He's big.

[Christine Evans]

Just like a stage rape. And they just.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But they were never together. But he still got to feel her up.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, that is pretty great.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, it's like wrestling.

[Christine Evans]

Nice.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's rock star stuff.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, how. I mean, meatloaf was ugly. I mean, look at that shot. I mean, he's got a goofy mouth.

[Christine Evans]

No, no. The guy was never good looking. Never at any point. But he could sing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sing.

[Christine Evans]

His ass had a good voice.

[Bobby Kelly]

The range. Absolutely. He's a rock star.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But he was more theater. I mean, he would. He. He brought. It was that perfect time of rock and roll where they. They like. She said they had that theater rock with all that stuff. If he came a little later, he's not like, you know, Robert Plant and those guys. He was. No, no, he was very theatrical.

[Bobby Kelly]

He ate any plants.

[Christine Evans]

Straight meatloaf. You know, it's gotta suck.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That'd be funny. That's what he did. That was his diet. Just meatloaf. That's how he got the name.

[Christine Evans]

If we.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No one ever. No one ever did the origin story of meatloaf. It was like. Because I like meatloaf. Every night. He had a. He had a chef that just cooked meatloaf.

[Bobby Kelly]

He'd have it in his pockets.

[Christine Evans]

Ketchup glaze or a barbecue sauce glaze.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Ah, it'd be funny if he just. All the catering is just meatloaf.

[Christine Evans]

Let me guess. Meatloaf.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

His band members kept dying because they kept.

[Christine Evans]

He goes, happy birthday, meatloaf. He goes, this is just gonna be icing on top of a meatloaf, isn't it? Yeah, it is. You know what's gotta suck? You're a rock star legend. He probably did get great pussy in his day. And when they have to make the rock movie about. You know, they make the autobiography movie about him. The guy who plays him is Warren, the retarded kid from Something about Mary. That's who plays Meatloaf. Yeah, yeah, the guy. Yeah. There were headphones. He all touches. That's meatloaf and the meat. He got to play a rock star. Will you love me forever? That just has to blow the casting of yourself. You're like, ah, shit.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He did that so good. I thought he was really.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

He did it so good. When he went, not my ears. And he fucking.

[Christine Evans]

Maybe one of the hardest laughs I had a movie to that point in my life was when they touched the headphone. He just swings a punch. The funniest thing in the world.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was such a good movie.

[Christine Evans]

Punch out of nowhere is a very funny thing used in movies. I don't see much. Is it the Ace Ventura, the original, at the very end of the movie, gets into the fight with the Philadelphia Eagle.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine Evans]

Do you remember the way it happens? There's like two guys, they half push each other and they're just like, yeah, yeah.

[Bobby Kelly]

He's not even looking at that. His arms just go.

[Christine Evans]

He's like, christine, bring up the fun. He's Ventura punching the Philadelphia Eagle. It's so funny. He's like, bite me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, she was gonna bring.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, you got Warren, too.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, bring up Warren. I want to see Warren. He's such a perfect size dude to play this guy, too.

[Christine Evans]

That's meatloaf.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What the hell are you doing? I love that she had a. Just the blackest of dads. What the you doing? Why are you touching my boy?

[Christine Evans]

He's Ventura punching the Eagle. Really? The opening shot of it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's like Bob Barker and. Yeah, and Happy Gilmore. That was funny, too.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I liked the water boy. When the. That fat teacher would just get a baseball in the face.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Just hit him in the head. They don't.

[Christine Evans]

Swift and blinding violence is always hilarious in comedy. Whenever something happens fast.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Matt Dillon was in that. What About Mary, too. That was his first comedy Little Thing, right?

[Christine Evans]

Was it?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I think so.

[Christine Evans]

I think maybe first he's done much comedy. After that, he.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know, but that. He was good.

[Christine Evans]

Matt. Dylan to me is the outsiders. And then it's gotta be something else.

[Bobby Kelly]

He was like Brat Pack adjacent, sort of text.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, he was drugstore cowboy, Rat Pack before. Yeah, he was. Before he was like.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. Outsiders was before rap.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

70S, 80s, late 70s, early 80s. And then he went away because the Brat Pack, that Hollywood shit came around. He was not that he was from Jersey, I think on New York.

[Christine Evans]

I see. Every time I drive in from Jersey at the Lincoln Tunnel, I see the billboard for the Outsiders musical. And it is funny. Like, you know, it's like the Greasers, like the tough kids who would kick ass. And you just see it's all musical theater. People playing gangs is the funniest thing in the world.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. It's just gay guys.

[Christine Evans]

It's. When I go back, I'm like, why did I think west side Story was so cool. I was like, I want to grow up and be a Jet. I want to be a boy. Dancing in the streets. It wasn't even that they were dancing. They were doing, like, genuine, like, ballet mood. When they're walking, like, menacing the streets, they like. They're like. Like both hands up in the air, like skips.

[Bobby Kelly]

And with a little switchblade. Yeah, they had a little comb that sprung out.

[Christine Evans]

Can you imagine if you got murdered in a knife fight by a dancer?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's like roller skating me to death. Remember roller skating movies? That was tough.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Those guys were badasses. Did you roller skate back in the day?

[Christine Evans]

I still have no idea how to do anything off my feet, buddy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I used to go roller skating all the time.

[Christine Evans]

I believe you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I dated a professional roller skating girl.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, like a roller derby girl?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, she was a big dike. No, she was this big, big blonde. But, yeah, I remember her mouth was the cleanest mouth I've ever kissed. She used to brush her teeth, like, every eight minutes.

[Bobby Kelly]

Really?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She had the freshest mouth.

[Bobby Kelly]

Sounds like ocd.

[Christine Evans]

That means she's hiding something.

[Bobby Kelly]

I know.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, something's newer. She's a dead tooth or something. Just constantly keeping just cock breath.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Could you imagine sucking black DJ cock breath all the time?

[Christine Evans]

Although, maybe it's because I'm from Philadelphia, but I picture what Boston gangs were like when you were young. The Jets. Yeah, but the gym's neutral territory. And there's little Bobby in the vest. Are we going to give him a good old beat?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, let me be the guy in the Barracuda just did that kick. Yeah, yeah, I want to. Let me play this.

[Bobby Kelly]

Hey, look at me.

[Christine Evans]

He goes, you guys want to go rob a store?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Jazz hands, Ball change. Step, ball, chain, step.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. The guy in the gray sweater. I was always too handsome for the Jets. I feel like now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Do you think all these guys. Because back in the day, you had to sing, dance and act.

[Christine Evans]

The triple threats.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You had to be the triple threat. Now you don't have to be a triple threat. You can just act.

[Christine Evans]

No, of course. But say, what's crazy Rip, the leader of the jets, right, who's very acrobatic, as in this movie, he does my favorite thing. He sits on a pipe going across from building to building, singing his song. And then at one point, he just drops backwards and flips and, like, lands on his feet on the ground. That guy was just in the whole series of Twin Peaks. Is like an old doctor guy.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, really?

[Christine Evans]

So, I mean, this is a.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We wouldn't be able to do that scene. They just did. Wanna bet on the go scroll back.

[Christine Evans]

As launches the other one.

[Bobby Kelly]

Do this at Skank Fest.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. You just see one of us shooting into the air.

[Christine Evans]

A lousy chicken.

[Bobby Kelly]

Every Porter Rick.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

My question.

[Christine Evans]

They got ricking with chicken.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

My question is this, Jay. Do you think all these guys were gay back then? Because you had to be a triple threat.

[Christine Evans]

No, no. I mean, they've done gay stuff.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, if. If they made this now, it would definitely be all gay guys. Mostly.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, yes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

There'll be just 100% gay guys. But back then it wasn't gay to do this stuff. You had to. Yeah, yeah. Fred Astaire wasn't gay.

[Bobby Kelly]

Jean Kelly.

[Christine Evans]

I went. I took Christina to see the shared play. And it was genuinely. I was almost gay sex on stage. It was like. Yeah, it was pornographic.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, wow.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You have a pillow on your lap.

[Christine Evans]

Every porter Rickens a lousy chicken.

[Bobby Kelly]

I'm gonna start saying Porter Ricken.

[Christine Evans]

Every porter Rick. That's a Louis. All times a lousy chicken.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Is this the new version?

[Christine Evans]

How dare you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, these guys are all.

[Christine Evans]

All gay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, they're all gay.

[Christine Evans]

They're triple threats.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Look, he's sucking that tooth.

[Christine Evans]

Still, triple threats. They could all sing and get in the mouth and ass. Triple threat, dog. I could dance in two other holes. Why are they so dirty in this one too?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, it's Hell's Kitchen.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know. Just saying.

[Christine Evans]

Everybody works in the quarry. This remake had no heart. It lost everything. I saw it in the theater. The only thing that was neat about it was. Again, it's those things that. I watched all these movies when I was young, before I lived in New York. And not realizing. I didn't realize that I live. We lived in Hell's Kitchen. We saw the movie at, what's it? 72nd, Lincoln Center, Lincoln Square. And the. The movie takes place on 72nd and like Broadway, it's like, that's all where the movie takes place. That was kind of neat. But this version house, Kitchen, Upper West. Upper West.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

At that point, hell's kitchen is 50th and 59th and down, right?

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. But something happens on 72nd and on Broadway. That's right where we saw the movie, which is pretty cool.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But this guy have lesions.

[Christine Evans]

I don't know. Because if you're gay, you probably have AIDS in this time.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, they'd have AIDS back in the.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, no, sure, dude. Rock Hudson, all these guys, he brought it in. Sweet. Early, early aids. No, this was. This was a bum out to see like it was. They took out There's a Place for Us as a song.

[Bobby Kelly]

I love that one.

[Christine Evans]

They have Rita Moreno sing it in lieu of it being done by like them. She does like a weird version of it herself. Oh, it was crushing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

This is the gayest conversation I've ever had.

[Christine Evans]

Why don't you. Why are you afraid to open up?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Because I'm scared.

[Christine Evans]

You love me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'll tell you why I fucking love music. I fucking unclench. You can sacrifice your sacro sitting in the back row.

[Christine Evans]

Bobby, your boy and James, I don't know if you know this, are twirly birding around rooms trying out for plays non stop. I never tried out for a play when I was younger.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Tell you something, first of all, my kid's the topper.

[Christine Evans]

Sure, sure, sure. Either way. Would you rather have your boy laying on his stomach though? Or your boy's underwear smelling like someone else's butt?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What are the choices again?

[Christine Evans]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It could be okay. Yeah. I gotta say, figure this out.

[Christine Evans]

I hated the remake.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I've never seen it. The whole. The original full three. Yeah. Cuz I'm not gay.

[Christine Evans]

You don't.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I haven't seen the.

[Christine Evans]

It's about gangs.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's about gay gangs. No, I don't mind a musical. I like a musical, but I've never seen the whole thing.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's a Romeo and Juliet.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Never seen.

[Christine Evans]

I overcomp.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Never seen that. Never seen that.

[Christine Evans]

What are you over compensating for? Because all the shows you like to watch, you're like. It's like SWAT and, and. And guys doing like.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't like that. I like Psych and I like Psych. A silly show. They do musicals once a year. Once a year they have a musical episode of Psych.

[Christine Evans]

And you get upset.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I get happy.

[Christine Evans]

I don't like when. I don't like when the shows musical up. My regular shows, I love that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So do. When Psych did a musical. Are you crazy? It's a great one. That was a great episode.

[Christine Evans]

And you think that's less gay than west side Story?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know.

[Christine Evans]

About gang life in the 50s.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, about gay gang life. They danced, they didn't fight.

[Christine Evans]

Were you around the 50s? That's how they fought back then. Here's my favorite. This is my favorite. Yeah, this is the best part. Could you imagine that happening with the gang in your street? Look at the moves. This is my favorite part.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I would just go over, get blowjobs from all of them.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. Get the out of the way. Nobody would have a problem yelling at them when they're crossing the street. Get the out of the street.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Christine Evans]

Hey, Nancy's, when you're done, an African.

[Bobby Kelly]

Guy with a machete just shows up, goes through all of them.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, I mean Palestinians come over and just light them on fire.

[Christine Evans]

Look at that. All it took was one Puerto Rican.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is that the porter? And now can you explain to me the story about this? Because I, I swear to God, I've never seen it.

[Christine Evans]

Sure.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All the way through.

[Christine Evans]

In New York at one time, at one point, if you could believe it, dominated by whites.

[Bobby Kelly]

The good old days.

[Christine Evans]

I mean, dominated by. Well around this time now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Can I ask one quick? So Puerto Ricans back then still.

[Christine Evans]

Look, how great would it be if we lived in a time where a Lewis can walk down the street and.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Be surround so the Puerto Ricans back then look like the Puerto Ricans now?

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. Their pants were a little higher.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay.

[Christine Evans]

Their pants were a little higher though.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think he should dress like that. Lewis should start dressing like this guy.

[Christine Evans]

Go back, go back. Because I want you to see how he spins to touch the wall in frustration that he just got picked on. The best things in life come when you don't settle. That's why switching to Metro is a great choice. Because at Metro you don't just get great deals, you get even more of what you love. You shouldn't have to put up with the yada yada you find with other carriers. Things like hidden fees, contracts and underwhelming deals. That's why at Metro you can get great deals on 5G devices from top brands like Samsung. With no contracts, no credit checks, no exploding bills and nada, yada yada. That's wireless without the gotcha. With more 5G phones to choose from and incredible deals, you'll never feel like you're accepting less than what you deserve. Stop by your neighborhood Metro store and learn about their amazing deals. Go to metrobyt mobile.com stores to find a location near you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

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[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, yeah. It's brown face.

[Christine Evans]

For sure.

[Bobby Kelly]

It's full brown face.

[Christine Evans]

Could you imagine being trying to get intimidated by two guys who just danced their way in front of you? Like, now what? I'm like, now what are you guys going to rate me?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're going to bring it.

[Christine Evans]

Look at this. No, I can't.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Wait a minute.

[Bobby Kelly]

I can't handle it. And then you're scared, and then you're afraid.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Jay. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to call you gay. Jay.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, the snaps, the snaps, the intimidating.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, now there's more rickens.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What is it? What's rickens?

[Christine Evans]

Puerto Ricans. They're all lousy chickens.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Chickens. Okay, I gotcha.

[Bobby Kelly]

They move in packs. Look at this ography.

[Christine Evans]

You gotta gather more Puerto Ricans.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So now they're back in their neighborhood. No, what are they?

[Christine Evans]

Puerto Ricans.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So the jets versus the.

[Christine Evans]

Okay, so you're right. I'm sorry. Lower this.

[Bobby Kelly]

The jets play in the Meadowlands.

[Christine Evans]

So the Jets. The Puerto Ricans play in every park all summer and they use up all the public grills.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Puerto Ricans are on all the podcasts.

[Christine Evans]

So it was a very white New York. An amazing time, they say, in our history.

[Bobby Kelly]

The golden days.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The golden days that Trump's trying to get back to.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, he's trying to turn back the clock a little bit. Am I right? Is that. We'll call it. That's a good way to call it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Trump's trying to dial back the clock.

[Christine Evans]

A little bit, man. Buy us a little more time.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I think he's got a hat, Jay. I'm pretty sure he's got a hat that says what he's trying to do.

[Christine Evans]

To help. He wants to do his part. He's a jet.

[Bobby Kelly]

You're a jet. He's an ultimate jet all the way.

[Christine Evans]

Donald Trump's the ultimate jet. I'm one of the last remaining members of the jets.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Can somebody please AI him dancing. I guarantee he'll retweet it 100%.

[Christine Evans]

He's one of the Jets.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, I think you should make the Puerto Ricans Mexicans and have them, like, dancing them over a wall.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Put tattoos on their knuckles.

[Christine Evans]

So in a white dominated Hell's Kitchen area.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. Irish, right?

[Christine Evans]

Seems like it. Well, I don't think Irish are the best dancers. Yeah, I think there's some Italian in there.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

First of all. I don't know if you've seen Irish step dancing, but whatever.

[Bobby Kelly]

Shout out Riverdance, we'll move on.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, that would be way less gay than what's happening in these streets. If they did a group river dance, it would be less gay.

[Bobby Kelly]

They don't even use their arms.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, they just, like, stare at you. They just stare at you while their.

[Bobby Kelly]

Feet are going as hell.

[Christine Evans]

So the Puerto Ricans who use your.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Arms in Ireland, they cut them off because you're too silly. Cut his arms off. He's being gay in the dance.

[Christine Evans]

So what are they supposed to be?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Polish Irish mix.

[Bobby Kelly]

Okay.

[Christine Evans]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Polish smart mix.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, yeah. Pollocks, pasty, polo.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

A little fun. History about Hell's Kitchen, it was mostly Irish. Back in the Westies, it was Irish Irish. But the Irish mafia was over there.

[Christine Evans]

Westies.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, they were. And they just recently, in the last 10 years, have been pushed out.

[Christine Evans]

The Westies?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, the Irish people.

[Christine Evans]

It's the Westies.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's the Irish people.

[Christine Evans]

I think the world calls them the Westies. Right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's fish salad.

[Christine Evans]

I want to tell you. I want to tell you the story of west side Story.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Fish salad. White fish salad.

[Christine Evans]

It's white fish salad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yes. Go ahead.

[Christine Evans]

So, yeah, the Irish. The Irish Polacks for the time have been menacing their own streets, but mostly with dance. And it seems like they're very low crime. But they do have switchblades on them. Yeah, but that's last resort. And so they are fighting for control of just the streets, really. Just no one. Seems to be. No real crime going on. They just want to be able to dance freely without the influence or interference of the other race.

[Bobby Kelly]

Right, right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Can I ask a question?

[Bobby Kelly]

They want to keep their dances clean.

[Christine Evans]

So much of west side Story, too, with black people mov in the neighborhood. And then the break dancing and then the stancing really starts up. You got served.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The Puerto Ricans.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The. What are they called again?

[Christine Evans]

Puerto Ricans. The Sharks.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The Puerto Ricans.

[Christine Evans]

Puerto Ricans. They're lousy chickens. The every Puerto Rican.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The Puerto Ricans. So they're there. That's not their neighbor. Don't they. Didn't they have a section of it?

[Christine Evans]

They have. They have moved in. The immigrants are here now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

All right, so.

[Christine Evans]

And our poock.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Irish.

[Christine Evans]

Irish dancing are not enjoying that at all. They want to dance the way they. And these guys are also bringing in their fucking Hispanic bullshit dancing with the snaps and a lot of fucking frilly skirt. Yeah. It's loud. They go way late.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah.

[Christine Evans]

They do not have any appreciation for.

[Bobby Kelly]

Other people's Time they're on their stoops non stop.

[Christine Evans]

They're probably getting money from the government, so they're not even have. They don't have to work the next day. And the jets families, they know, it's like, hey, we got to stop dancing and singing in the streets at about 10pm or else our parents are going to kick our ass.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Colin Quinn said, they're the only people that take the inside stuff out. The outside stuff.

[Christine Evans]

Ye.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Which annoys Irish Pollocks.

[Bobby Kelly]

They stay pregnant.

[Christine Evans]

No doubt. So you'll find out though. Although the jets would like the Sharks pushed out right through song. You will hear that the Puerto Ricans in fact love to live in America.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

They love it.

[Christine Evans]

They love to be in America.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Wow. You really. That came out of you. That shot out of you. I won't even hold on to that one, baby.

[Bobby Kelly]

I just got inspired now.

[Christine Evans]

Bernardo.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What? Bernardo is the.

[Christine Evans]

The guy who spun sad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Spun said.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. The guy who spun. Who got. Who spins into his head.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Is there any other way Be sad then to spin sad.

[Christine Evans]

I wish I could.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm.

[Christine Evans]

I wish when I was upset about stuff that I was able to maintain the humor to like just to turn from Christine or some kind of thing like that and just turn.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

The next time I walk into dawn when she's sleeping at night and I want to have sex, I'm just going to go.

[Christine Evans]

And then look back.

[Bobby Kelly]

That'll work.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

She's going to be like this nice. Oh, God.

[Christine Evans]

So he's definitely Bernardo, is not he?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I love that they took an Italian and just made him Puerto Rican.

[Christine Evans]

The ladies, the Puerto Rican ladies are having a good time. They're not feeling the same street pressure that the guys are feeling out in gangland warfare.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Of course.

[Christine Evans]

So the girls are having a ball. Then they say, you know what? For some odd reason there's a dance and all of the Puerto Ricans and all of the Pollock Irish are coming. And in that a fringe member of the jets who's trying to turn his life around. He doesn't want to just be dancing in the streets anymore. There's a future out there. So his name is Tony. Tony got himself a real job.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Tony's a Jet. He's an Irish Pollock named Tony.

[Christine Evans]

They didn't overthink that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I mean, you should.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. Tony jablonski. Tony.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Sean McGillicutter.

[Christine Evans]

So Tony Anthony. Tony shows up to the dance, you know, just to be there to support his buds. Say hi to the.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Can I ask you a question? Sure. These. These Puerto Rican guys right here seem to have these leather wristbands. I'm just wondering, in your lifetime, have you ever had one of those?

[Christine Evans]

Yes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay, great. Go ahead.

[Christine Evans]

So wore one on Bad Boys, a comedy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Okay, perfect.

[Christine Evans]

You can see it. That one. Tell you what, a lot of people don't mention that part when they see that stupid outfit they made me wear on that. But that part was my. Mine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, your. Your Puerto Rican gang dance.

[Christine Evans]

Yes, yes. Okay, so they have what I can only describe, and they. This up, too, in the new one, One of the greatest no fight involved dances here where everybody goes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, my. Was that just incredible? Was that just to keep your blood going? Your heart rate? Strap a leather band to his arms. Keep. Get him out there, I think.

[Bobby Kelly]

Isn't there a West side Story joke in here?

[Christine Evans]

Yes. My west side Story joke is it closes it. Dress like a shark.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Can we please. Can we please watch it at the end? Just at the end. We throw that on. Oh, my God. That. The band is just nuts. That's a whole cow really going to grow with your.

[Christine Evans]

Can I leave, though, while we do this? Can I leave while we do this?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No. Come on. Go ahead. You look adorable. Look at you now. Don't do it, Christine.

[Christine Evans]

Are you going to play it?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Don't.

[Bobby Kelly]

No, Jay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, Jay, we're not going to play it right now. We might play it later, like a little kid.

[Christine Evans]

Definitely west side Story. And what's funny is I. I say west side Story, I say west side Story, and I sing a tune to a Grease. It's actually. Grease Lightning is actually what I is.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

A theater nerd, man. You. I. I say in the next couple years, you try to get in a real musical on Broadway.

[Christine Evans]

I was in an off Broadway musical already.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, you weren't.

[Christine Evans]

Yes, I was off.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Not, not.

[Christine Evans]

You know, this.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was off, off, off those three offs.

[Christine Evans]

I mean, I don't know how much off Broadway you can be. Where was it off of Broadway?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, but where?

[Christine Evans]

72Nd and Broadway.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's not the Broadway they're talking about. They're talking about this Broadway down here.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, but we were off Broadway.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's what my therapist is.

[Christine Evans]

Directly across the street from the therapist at the Triad.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, I know. That's not a fucking off Broadway. That's off off.

[Christine Evans]

Excuse me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's off off, off.

[Christine Evans]

Excuse me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's three offs.

[Christine Evans]

Well, the point is, I was in a mute musical.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You were? You were. What's that? It's off Broadway. It's not off Broadway. I know. You gotta stick up for me as your man. It Is.

[Christine Evans]

Well, I danced with a cane, so felt off Broadway to me. What I did. Dance with a cane.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Your life, dude. Here we go.

[Christine Evans]

Give me. Go. You can give Bobby a taste. West side Story.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I've seen it before But I will never turn down a chance to see you.

[Christine Evans]

I wish we could find me Taking my time I tried to teach myself how to fight. When I was younger, I thought I was gonna be this man. I was. So I was gonna watch movies for black people. I tell you this, everybody gonna say that to me.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Those. Dude, you look so crazy looking at that and then looking at the. I mean, you're wearing a.

[Christine Evans]

They made me wear that.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, the pants are so.

[Christine Evans]

Those were mine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, sorry, sorry.

[Christine Evans]

Those pants were my choice. God damn, dude. I bet those were a size 48.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You were in a duvet. Those are huge.

[Christine Evans]

Those are 48 and I'm wearing 36.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And those aren't even fitted. Those are just. You bought.

[Christine Evans]

I bought those baggy, though.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You bought the baggy? Baggy was in.

[Christine Evans]

They were. Yeah. They were big on me. Clearly.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Dud, you look so good right now.

[Christine Evans]

Well, I'm not wearing Kiss Kiss. Go ahead, Christine. Let him see me dance really quick.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But the Tri Theater generally considered off Broadway venue. You know what, Christine? I could find anything with AI.

[Bobby Kelly]

That's a good woman right now.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That was AI. That was.

[Christine Evans]

I guess I wasn't an awful Broadway production.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

There's no way. First of all, so was I. How many seats?

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, were you?

[Bobby Kelly]

I was in a play called Mono in Theater Row.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's what you had.

[Christine Evans]

Kissing disease.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What's up, son? I was in off. I was actually in Off Broadway.

[Bobby Kelly]

Oh, now who's gay?

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, but that's super gay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It wasn't a musical.

[Christine Evans]

It was.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It was acting.

[Bobby Kelly]

Mine was a play too.

[Christine Evans]

What we did was fun.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Cuz we're not.

[Bobby Kelly]

We're not.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We're not.

[Christine Evans]

We're not gay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We're not. This.

[Christine Evans]

Bobby. It's gayer to stage act.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It is not.

[Bobby Kelly]

I don't think so.

[Christine Evans]

Acting gay. Acting gay. To sing and dance is funny. You're saying what you're doing was you. You took your lines very seriously.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're saying, first of all, it was a comedy, so I didn't. Second of all, four dogs in a bone.

[Christine Evans]

You take your comedy very seriously. You have to go be alone in a room and find your center before you go on stage.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, because you invite 75 people. Because you're a hippie.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, we're trying to hang out. We're shooting this Man, No.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But also, everybody's smoking weed in the dressing room, and I'm 39 years old. Right. I don't want to lose my sobriety. Josh and everybody else. Hey, man, we're not on the show, but we're here to support Jay.

[Christine Evans]

Josh doesn't even to smoke you.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Listen, I went in the other room.

[Christine Evans]

You have to go storyboard your set.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I. I wrote down. I wrote down my jokes that I was going to do, and I had my little room. You go on and wing it.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah, dude. I come in, I'm like, Larry Flint. The party's never going to end. Guys around with bottles.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, you smoke weed. That's a. I don't have that. You get to take a Lexa Pro.

[Christine Evans]

That's what my green room's going on. Snorting Lexa Pros.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Dude, I got.

[Christine Evans]

You guys do SSR eyes.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I can't even supposed to keep your.

[Christine Evans]

Serotonin in so you don't cry when you're alone.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I can't even do soda anymore. I can't even have a drink. I have to drink water.

[Christine Evans]

Go ahead, Christine. For the love of God. You don't have to play the sounds. Just play it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Play it loud.

[Christine Evans]

By watching movies. I was getting with at school a lot, right? So I'm go home at grandma.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Stop for one second. I love that your beard is growing in thicker and just two spots on the mustache, which Reese called that.

[Christine Evans]

My Just called that beard my jawline. He said, I don't have a beard. I just make my own jawline. Some gangs and violent and some fights. What do we got? She goes, oh, gangs. We have Grease and West side Story. So, man, cigarettes is. I watched them a lot. And I went to school real cocky, starting with these Broadway skills. I'm slapping people and pushing them, and I like to think they tweaked my voice for fair use.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, absolutely.

[Christine Evans]

So they probably made my voice super high. Yeah. And then I did this.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

And if you ever noticed, this is when you could really sing.

[Christine Evans]

I said the word. I say the words. And in this set, that's the word I noticed when I first saw it. And I've never watched it full through again. I say in after all, that was your thing. Some something. And then you're gonna go to the store and. And then she's gonna come talk to me.

[Bobby Kelly]

And he's cool.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Switching boy.

[Christine Evans]

Boy, was it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Mine was.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, man.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I used to go, what's up, everybody?

[Christine Evans]

Bobby? And then you retire an hour, and you'd go, all right, what's going to be my joke this year. How are we going to get. Oh, my God. Stop pausing on these parts. Christine, did you just take the last sip? What a psychotic. I was like, I'll be there. I'll be there, right? Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Ah, shit.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. 3:30 it is. What? See you then. They don't like that when you get a little flarey at the end. It doesn't. They don't like it.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What you've always wanted to.

[Christine Evans]

3:30. What does that mean?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That means you're orange peel face. Listen, Jay, it's not bad. You have dance in your heart.

[Christine Evans]

You're orange peel phobic.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm not. I love orange peels. I love when you dance. It makes me so happy. My friends is getting in touch with dance.

[Christine Evans]

So what?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

So what? Dude? Dance. Dance, bro.

[Christine Evans]

I thought you said together we were going to do the new edition choreography.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Buddy, I'll do anything you want because I support you in your life. You're like my son that I want to just get behind.

[Christine Evans]

Why do we gotta take a break now?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

We got three reads.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, and Bobby, right?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, I've been killing it.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I mean, dude, that was fucked up.

[Christine Evans]

What?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, Just because we, you know. Don't get mad that you saw old Fat Jay.

[Christine Evans]

Well, they didn't even have me dance yet.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Let him dance.

[Bobby Kelly]

He dances. He's skinnier in the second half.

[Christine Evans]

That's all it took. I stopped dieting Soda and I dance once in a while. I stopped drinking soda.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, my God.

[Christine Evans]

I'm a crazy motherfucker and you don't want to mess with me. Then the background dancers jumped like motherfucker crazy.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

It's the best.

[Christine Evans]

We don't get our asses kicked.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

But it's my favorite. It's my favorite. Look at the figures.

[Bobby Kelly]

A little animation about something.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, yeah. Look at those little sausage fingers. Flip around.

[Christine Evans]

You're.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're gorgeous.

[Christine Evans]

What? From that, you. You can. You have moves.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Oh, here.

[Christine Evans]

I'm in tune with my body. Genuine.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. It's in you, dude. You.

[Christine Evans]

I know my body. So what? So what? The man knows how to move his body.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

You're made to dance. You're made to dance with a cane.

[Christine Evans]

Oh, you haven't seen my cane dance. There's no footage at all of how the musical.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, you can recreate it. You can learn it again.

[Christine Evans]

Karen's new special, Don't Serve Me is out now on Only Fans tv. Nice. Where is that? It's on Only Fans, you goof.

[Bobby Kelly]

Yeah, you can watch it for free. You don't have to pay. They did. They did Whitney Cummings special and then mine is the second one that they've done.

[Christine Evans]

And the Burton the. And the rose.

[Bobby Kelly]

They did a couple rose and the couple rose. They did Burt and Whitney's.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, that's cool. So how they can pay whatever they want.

[Bobby Kelly]

They don't have to pay anything. It's just on the website for free.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That's cool. I'm gonna go watch it.

[Christine Evans]

Awesome. Right now on OnlyFans TV. It's called Don't Serve me. Check it out. And she's gonna be at hilarities in Cleveland June 8th and Comet Comedy in Cincinnati June 13th and 14th. Robert Kelly is everywhere. He's not. He's only going to be in San Diego and be take the summer off. Actually he's. And then the dojo for some dojo.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I'm going to Monday night. Next Monday night I'm at the dojo with Aaron Berg and Joe List.

[Christine Evans]

Yeah. How's that possible?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't know. I don't know. I. I'm going to leave here right. And try to make it there. I don't know.

[Christine Evans]

Okay.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah. I don't know.

[Christine Evans]

I was like, are we off on Monday?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Nope. Going to leave here at 7 and try to go through traffic and get there.

[Christine Evans]

Cuz it says the show starts at seven. Yep.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No. Shots at eight.

[Bobby Kelly]

Door. Door is at seven.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Starts at eight. Doors at seven.

[Bobby Kelly]

You just got to go late in the lineup. You'll be all right.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Dude, it's. Stop. Stop stressing me out, man. It's my show.

[Christine Evans]

It's. Look at the thing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

No, you didn't look at the thing. You. You did it. You're just.

[Christine Evans]

I saw the. No, I saw the thing. The flyer.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Yeah, it's the Aenberg flyer that he put together.

[Christine Evans]

Cigars and comedy cigars.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Smoking stoke and laugh.

[Christine Evans]

Smoking token. Laughing.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Come down and hang out and get some bad breath with good jokes.

[Christine Evans]

I'll be in Cincinnati next weekend. Yeah, this weekend. I can't say why. I'm not allowed to say what. Maybe it's a surprise.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Are you doing a surprise show?

[Christine Evans]

No.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What?

[Christine Evans]

Maybe I'll be a surprise somewhere.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

What? You coming to mic Drop to do a show with me this weekend?

[Christine Evans]

Maybe I'll be a Mic Drop with Bobby.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Are you coming to Mic drop this weekend to do show with me?

[Christine Evans]

Wouldn't that be something?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

That'd be the come down dude.

[Christine Evans]

No, wherever I'm this weekend I'll be dancing and I can't have you there for that. I won't sit there for your judgment while I'm letting go.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I don't judge you, dude. I support everything.

[Christine Evans]

I like to dance like no black people or no bobbies are watching.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

I support whatever you do, son. Whatever you. Whatever you.

[Christine Evans]

Comedy.com and we'll be right back. Everyone's the bonfire. We're hanging out with Karen Feehan all day, all night, right here.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

How many discounts does USAA Auto Insurance offer? Too many to say here. Multi vehicle discount. Safe driver discount. New vehicle discount. Storage discount, Legacy.

[Bobby Kelly]

How many discounts will you stack up? Tap the banner or visit usaa.com autodiscounts.

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Restrictions to supply McCrispy strips are now at McDonald's.

[Christine Evans]

Tender, juicy and its own sauce. Would you look at that?

[Big Jay Oakerson]

Well, you can't see it, but trust me, it looks delicious.

[Christine Evans]

New McCrispy strips now at McDonald's.