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Tam Bam
This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.
AJ Holiday
What a matchup we got y'.
Tam Bam
All.
AJ Holiday
This is that classic HBCU vibe. Non stop action. The band is rockin and the crowd lit. Chance echo drum beat everybody showing that school pride. A game like this. Yeah, it calls for an ice cold Coca Cola. Ah, crisp and refreshing. That's a game changer right there. Yeah, that taste always hits the right note. Just like the band at halftime. And just like that, we're back at it. Passionate fans, school colors everywhere and an ice cold Coca Cola. That's a winning combo no matter the sport, no matter the yard. Everybody knows fan work is thirsty work. So grab a Coca Cola and keep that HBCU pride going. You've been working in the garage with your dad every week, Monday to Sunday, trying to get the old school up and running. Today, after all the hard work, y' all finally finished it. Even better. Your dad says all yours son. Yep. Same car that belongs to your grandpa that your dad helped him fix is yours. To really keep the tradition going, you need to get State Farm Insurance just like them generation to generation. Remember to choose the agents that your family counted on. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.
Sophie Cunningham
This is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something. Do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snored loudly or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at. Don't sleep on osa.com this information is provided by Lilly a medicine company.
AJ Holiday
Want to sell your car your way?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Who wouldn't?
AJ Holiday
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Dr. Kelly Elmore
Hey Ryan Reynolds here wishing you a.
AJ Holiday
Very happy half off holiday because right.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Now Mint Mobile is offering you the.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Gift of 50% percent off unlimited.
AJ Holiday
To be clear, that's Half price, not half the service.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Mint is still premium unlimited wireless for a great price.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So that means a half day.
Tam Bam
Yeah.
AJ Holiday
Give it a try@mintmobile.com Switch upfront payment.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
$45 for three month plan equivalent to $15 per month required new customer offer for first three months only. Speed slow after 35 gigabytes of networks busy. Taxes and fees extra c mintmobile.com hey, everybody, it's Dr. Kelly Omz and I'm on We Talk Back podcast. I can't wait for you to hear us talk about perimenopause and menopause. We gonna give you some real information so that you can keep it wet, clean and fantastic through your 40s and 50s.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, a production of iHeartRadio and the Black Effect Network.
Tam Bam
We're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion who talk back. What's up, y'? All?
AJ Holiday 2.0
It's your girl, A.J. holiday. What's up, Tam Bam?
Tam Bam
Hey, y', all, it's me, Tam Bam. I love y' all so, so very much and I'm glad y' all came back. I missed y'. All. How was your weekend?
AJ Holiday 2.0
How's your weekend?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Like, they probably be in their car.
AJ Holiday 2.0
They probably be in their car. Like, AJ gonna say this, Tam gonna say this.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And.
AJ Holiday 2.0
And then Tam go say, how was your weekend? They saying it with you. Like, and then AJ gonna say uneventful. I do my thing.
Tam Bam
I went to Costco. I flew a tight.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Definitely went to Costco, definitely went to TJ Maxx. And my super bright light skinned homegirl who's been in town since I was like, I don't know, 12 came by this weekend. So I do much. Just chilling and being grateful. I did go see my mom. I hung out with her a little bit on Sunday. I know she loves it when I come sit over there a lot. Your whole day be gone. But I don't know.
Tam Bam
I.
AJ Holiday 2.0
This. I worked out a little bit and that's about it. I didn't do much this weekend. For real. I really just relaxed and chilled.
Tam Bam
I was just working. It's that time of year where I'm busy, you know. Thank you, Jesus.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Right?
Tam Bam
So I just been working. I. Nothing eventful happened. Oh, no, I lied. I went to.
AJ Holiday 2.0
You always lie.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Go.
Tam Bam
I went to a. My teeth look white as hell. I think it's that.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Hell yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I was just about to say that. Like, what?
Tam Bam
The.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Teeth super white.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
It's the.
Tam Bam
I think it's the light. I don't know. But anyway, I went to this new spot in Charlotte called Astra Mediterranean something lounge. And it was like one of those. It was like a halal place, but it had the hookah and it's like. It was good, you know, they didn't have alcohol, but I didn't. I don't want none of that anyway. And I had some food and it was nice. And then I went to Crave and Dessert bar, and I got a.
AJ Holiday 2.0
That's one of my favorite spots in Charlotte.
Tam Bam
I still love Crave.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yeah, it's consistent.
Tam Bam
Yeah, Consistent quality. And I had like a little hookah, a little cocktail and carrot cake. Cupcake. Yes. And that was it. That was my.
AJ Holiday 2.0
You don't eat the bread pudding from there.
Tam Bam
I'm not a bread pudding girly girl. First of all, I would. Yeah, I've never had bread pudding, now that I think about it.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Oh, you tripping when I tell you. Me and Priscillisa just go there for the bread pudding because they give you. You know, it's like in a little. Little saucer and a rampkin. That's what they call a ramkin.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And.
AJ Holiday 2.0
And they have like, the ramekin and they have the, like the. The frosty sauce, you know, the white. What is it called? Icing. I have, like, icing. Yeah, Like a little thing on the side. Oh, I. I'm not a super duper. What is the bread pudding girly? But I did grow up off of bread pudding, and they have a very, very, very, very good bread pudding. If they still have it on a menu, you should try it next time.
Tam Bam
I'll try it. I've never had bread pudding. I always associated bread pudding and fruit cake is the same thing.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Like Forge.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yeah, theirs is really good.
Tam Bam
Like some old food. All right.
AJ Holiday 2.0
It is old people food because old people, when, like, the bread is about to get old, they just turn that into bread pudding right quick.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Or French toast.
AJ Holiday 2.0
French toast. Have a little mold on it. Old ass bread.
Tam Bam
So, yeah, that was it. I didn't do.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Sounds fun.
Tam Bam
Get in the sin, y'.
AJ Holiday 2.0
All. So Paul Pierce says the only way to really know if a girl loves you is to cheat on her and.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
See how she reacts.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So is this his podcast? I don't know.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
It's have a woman.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I don't think so. I mean, Paul Pierce is one of the biggest basketball players all time, right? And he's on this Truth After Dark podcast, and he sparked a lot of backlash by claiming that the only authentic way to determine if a woman truly loves you is to cheat on her and observe her reaction? He suggested that loyalty in the aftermath of infidelity proves devotion. That is disgusting. And I think a lot of us, a lot of women have really been thinking like, you know, if you. You go through some shit and stay. Stay the down ass woman, like, he's gonna choose you type mentality. Absolutely not. I ain't never been a dumb bitch in that way. I definitely have dealt with infidelity in relationships only really, because it's just human nature, like. But I also recognize now I don't have to. Yeah.
Tam Bam
Doing it sound crazy. Like, what in the hell?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Don't test me. Cause you're gonna fail every fucking time.
Tam Bam
Is he married? I don't know.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Is palpiers married? He can't be married. The type of he be talking in.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
There talking about, get it, get it.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Get a five or seven if you are.
Tam Bam
Okay.
AJ Holiday 2.0
The worst part is these are old farts talking like this. These are old ass men. Like, you know, right? And then he said the best way to see if a girl loves you. That's the problem right there. Y' all with girls.
Tam Bam
Girls and not grown women.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Try a woman. Okay, right. Because women be making cry. Okay, Because I'm gonna make you cry. I'm gonna break.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That's insane.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I'm getting the up out of there.
Tam Bam
It's so toxic.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Really.
Tam Bam
That is.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So basically you want to hurt the person you say you love because that's what you're doing, right? To see if they love you. That's weird.
Tam Bam
Yeah.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
You don't love her that you don't love her. Advice.
Tam Bam
Listen to that. You gonna find yourself alone talking about. Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
And also, you're not a millionaire, okay? So don't look, don't listen to a ballin ass baller, right? The type of he be doing. Y' all not the same.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
What you're going to do is lose.
Tam Bam
Because she love him. She might stay because it's comfortable.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Exactly.
AJ Holiday 2.0
She like her, her. Her lifestyle is just completely different. Right? So we ain't trying to compare ourselves to Beyonce and Jay Z relationship when we in these relationships with y' all niggas, right? So don't be Paul Pierce. But the thing is that he doesn't say anything that I don't think that men already think, right? He's just saying the things out loud because I really. I remember when I broke up with my ex most recently, like leading up to it, he was like, we ain't supposed to break up. Like, he mentioned his other friends, right? And how they went through all these things and she Stayed. Like, I've already went through things and stayed. I don't feel like going through anything else. Nigga, you point me out. Are you dumb? She's dumb.
Tam Bam
You've reached the quota, nigga.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Like you way past the threshold of. And my tolerance for is so high because I just understand human nature. You know what I'm saying? And I'm not a fucking loser. So even in relationships, I'm gonna try my fucking best. But at what point do you think you can just continuously be disloyal in a relationship and a woman is supposed.
Tam Bam
To keep you and stay like, bitches get tired. Okay.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yeah. And the thing is that I'll never think I can't do better. I can do comparable to you or greater every single time.
Tam Bam
Every single time. Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So I think women just got to up their self esteem, man. Get the up out of there whether he got money or not. Get your own bag.
Tam Bam
All right, that part. All right, listen to this. Listen to this. A wanted man in Ohio sent the police a selfie after seeing his photo on the news because he didn't like how it looked. And it wasn't the most flattering picture of him, y'.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All.
Tam Bam
So a man in Ohio made headlines after sending police a selfie because he.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Didn'T like the mugshot shown on the news.
Tam Bam
Identified as Donald Pugh, he was wanted for skipping a court appearance and linked to other cases like arson and vandalism. He even emailed the police saying his mug shot was terrible and offered a better photo of himself wearing sunglasses in the car.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Police thanked him for being helpful, but.
Tam Bam
Reminded him that rather see him in person to discuss his charges. His story quickly went viral, proving that crime and vanity don't mix well.
AJ Holiday 2.0
But is he in jail, though? Nope. I think he saw himself in the news like, oh, y' all got me fucked up here.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Here this man.
Tam Bam
A picture coming up in the photo, y'. All.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
The photo that he sent is much better.
Tam Bam
It's a better angle.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Hate NAS police. They know they could have picked a better picture than that.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Right?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Right.
Tam Bam
They trying to make me look like a hardened criminal. Right. That's funny story.
AJ Holiday 2.0
He probably. He definitely probably wanted for some scamming.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Okay. Credit card.
Tam Bam
You had to be like, mentally ill.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Or not give a fuck, you know? He just having fun. Like, I'm go to jail anyway, man. Let me just might as well enjoy my time. I'm a what? 2 chain song. I'm be fresh as hell when the feds come. I'll be fresh as hell when the feds come. That's what he was doing.
Tam Bam
This nigga I know, he from Youngstown, Ohio.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
He got to be.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I thought he was from Harlem. No.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Oh, oh, yeah.
Tam Bam
They're flashy people, too, in Harlem.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Don't take no up picture of me, y'.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So remember last week we were talking about. And I know y' all probably seen it. Now, this black woman, I think they were in, was it Ohio?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
California?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Might have been California. This happened at a Gold gym. Tish Hyman, she accused this man of exposing himself essentially in the women's locker room. And he says he's a transgendered woman and he belongs in a woman's locker room. The gym ultimately kicked her out. The woman, Tish Hyman, and basically canceled her membership after she, you know, was yelling in the middle of the. Of the Gold's gym, like, what the is wrong with y'? All? This is a grown man in the bathroom. But this week, y', all, apparently this same man, transgender person accused of exposing himself in women's locker room, was convicted of brutally beating his ex wife before taking her name. Okay? So Tish was not wrong for calling his ass out. And first of all, when are you going to transition? When are you going to actually transition? When you gonna cut that dick off?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Okay?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Because if you still got it, how you gotta transition?
Tam Bam
Cause can you. Can you be called trans if you still have your birth parts?
AJ Holiday 2.0
That's what I'm saying. Like, to me, I thought that trans, meaning the woman or the man has transitioned. Transitioned into the other sex by way of the sex change. If there hasn't been a sex change and there hasn't been a legal name change, and this person just can pull up in female women's spaces, that's a problem. Because I don't think any trans man is pulling up in the men's restroom.
Tam Bam
Right?
AJ Holiday 2.0
So this is just men trying to debo women's spaces. And again from last week, Tish, she's a. She's a lesbian woman, right? So the transgender person. Yeah, it happened in Los Angeles bathroom now. Being convicted of assaulting his now ex wife while living in Ohio as a man before taking the victim's name as their own.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Alex Black.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Ran a file of women. Ran afoul. Ran a file of women at a gym in Beverly Hills, including singer songwriter Tish Hyman, who accused them of exposing himself and harassing her in the locker room. And you could just see him pulling up in there like he's supposed to be in there.
Tam Bam
See, that's why I don't like that. And from the pictures, he didn't. And this is where I feel like it's a slippery soap, because Slope. Because he didn't look like he was trying to identify as a woman for real to me, because he didn't. He looked like a man with earrings on. That was it. But then I know women who look like men with earrings on.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So how do you.
Tam Bam
No, I ain't trying to be funny. I mean it like that. You know, like.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So how do you say, like, this.
Tam Bam
Person isn't trans or how do you say this person isn't? Like, how do you determine that? I don't even know.
AJ Holiday 2.0
You determine it by a genetic makeup. You were born a man. I was born a woman. Okay? Just because you have slick back hair with earrings on, and a woman can also appear like that. Being a woman is not about aesthetic. It's science. It is genetics.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Okay?
AJ Holiday 2.0
That's why even, you know, at the doctor's office, they still have, like, on a. On your paperwork, you know, they ask you. They. They want to be inclusive, right? So they have all the things in their man, were you, but they ultimately ask, were you born male or female? That's we not talking about what somebody look like. Yes, there are definitely women that look like men, but genetically, they're still a woman, and they belong in female spaces. Right? Women are not out here trying to violate. I feel like that man just wants to see women naked, and he's doing it under the guise of being transgendered.
Tam Bam
Especially with. With that history of domestic violence against women and then stealing identity.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That's a lot of.
AJ Holiday 2.0
A lot of those people, they're, like, mean. They are mean. And, you know, like, that is a telltale sign that your man might be okay on down low. If he's mean to you, if he's putting his hands on you, if he's being belligerent and abusive towards you, they don't like you. They don't like you. And oftentimes they might be battling their sexuality and taking it out on you. How dare you get to be a real woman? And, you know, and they. They are the main ones that are so upset and at arms about men who can live freely. Gay men, transgendered, trans, transgendered women who are out. Right. Don't give a fuck. When nobody thinks about it. It's the DL. Men that are dangerous, those are the dangerous ones.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Okay, I agree. Hold on.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Let me add this on there, y'. All.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I'm sorry.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I seen this post on Instagram. This girl, she was like, somebody said that if your man farn a lot.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
He might be DL And I had to think.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I had to think back.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Okay, girl, bye.
AJ Holiday 2.0
No, because the. In the comments too much.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Listen, broccoli, what's up with your.
AJ Holiday 2.0
What's up with your gut? My guy? What is up with your.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Your gastro system?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Like, it don't have nothing to do with gang. Why is your booty clapping so much? Hold on. One commented and said she was arguing with her ex husband and he had farted. And she said, why the your fart smell like lube? I commented, I said mad damn. I'm so mad that I don't with that I gotta violate like this anymore because I would definitely have that in the arsenal. Look at your fart smell like lube.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That is ridiculous. That is asinine. I bet.
Tam Bam
Why your fart smell like lube is crazy, y'. All, we have a guest on today, Dr. Kelly. She is talking perimenopause and menopause with us. We'll be right back. You are crazy.
AJ Holiday 2.0
All right, y', all, so today we're turning up the heat. Okay. Literally. Because we're talking perimenopause. This is what Tammy want to talk about. And listen, we are not going through this phase yet, okay? We just want to see what's okay.
Tam Bam
Listen, I'm not very sure. That's why I have questions, you know, because.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Right.
Tam Bam
Things are.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yeah, because it's exactly. So it's like that in between stage when your body like, we ain't done yet, but definitely changing. Okay, so today we have the incredible Dr. Kelly Elmore on We Talk Back. She's a board certified obgyn, retired Navy captain. Okay? So she's the boss.
Tam Bam
Happy getter's day.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Okay.
Tam Bam
Right.
AJ Holiday 2.0
And founder of KOE Medical Consulting. She's dedicated to helping women lead, live, thrive through every stage of life, including this one that me and Tammy are now going through.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah. Yeah. Aren't we all? Aren't we all? Aren't we all? Thank you for joining us, Dr. Kelly.
Tam Bam
I really, really appreciate you coming on talking to us and our listeners.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Thank you. Absolutely. I'm here for it. This is what I love. I tell people I love what I do, who I do it for and who I do it with. So that's my job.
Tam Bam
So tell us how you got into. Because like y', all, before the show started, she said she was Dr. Kelly.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Since she was 6 years old.
Tam Bam
So tell us about how you got into becoming a doctor, like your background.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Well, I tell people all the time. I was called to the pulpit of medicine. First, I want to say thank you both for having me on your wonderful show. I was called to the pulpit of medicine very early. I didn't have doctors in my immediate family. As a matter of fact, I was the first one to go and complete college. So, you know, everything after that, I was the first for that as well. But when I was a little girl, something told me in my spirit that I wanted to be a physician. And then one day, I was watching KPBS, I think I might have been 9 or 10 years old, and they were showing the first laparoscopic hysterectomy. My mom walked through the door like, what are you watching? Cause if you can imagine a woman is, like, in a certain position having this surgery.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Well, you knew.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Well, she was like, what are you watching? And I'm like, a laparoscopic hysterectomy? And she's like, did you. What is that? And I said, well, that's what I want to do. And I used to watch this show called Heartbeat, which was all about OBGYNs. And I was like, and that's what I want to do, too. Wow. So I decided that I wanted to, you know, be the safe place. Place for women, especially because I have a history of domestic violence in my family, that I wanted to be that safe place for women to express what's going on, not just with their bodies, but also spiritually, physically, financially, mentally, emotionally. So when you come to me, we having a full conversation.
AJ Holiday
What a matchup we got, y'.
AJ Holiday 2.0
All.
AJ Holiday
This is that classic HBCU vibe. Non stop action. The band is rocking and the crowd lit. Chance echo drum beat, everybody. Showing that school pride. A game like this, yeah, it calls for an ice cold Coca Cola.
Tam Bam
Ah.
AJ Holiday
Crisp and refreshing. That's a game changer right there. Yeah, that taste always hits the right note. Just like the band at halftime. And just like that, we're back at it. Passionate fans, school colors everywhere and an ice cold Coca Cola. That's a winning combo no matter the sport, no matter the yard. Everybody knows fan work is thirsty work. So grab a Coca Cola and keep that HBCU pride going. This past weekend, like every other Sunday, you were on the court with the guys playing ball. Just a pickup game, living out your hoop dreams. No triple doubles, but a mean set of threes in between buckets. One of the homies mentions he closed on a new crib. This is big. And while everyone's asking about the housewarming and making plans to celebrate, you're asking the real questions like has he spoke to his State Farm agent yet about coverage? See, home ownership is one thing, but the right coverage is the real game changer. Even more than your last hot streak is how you protect your legacy. Dropping buckets and bars on the court. A State Farm agent can more than assist you with finding the right coverage for your new place. If you have a claim, your local agent can help you file it. Yep, that's right. Over the phone, in person, online, or on the app, they're ready to help you and they don't drop the ball, if you know what I mean. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.
Sophie Cunningham
This is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something. Do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snore loudly, or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability, and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at don'tsleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lilly, A Medicine company.
AJ Holiday
Hey, everyone. Ed Helms here. And hi, I'm Kal Penn and we're the hosts of Irsay, the Audible and I Heart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Jenny Garth, host of the iHeart podcast. I choose me to discuss the new Audible adaptation of the timeless Jane Austen classic Pride and Prejudice. This is not a trick question. There's no wrong answer. What role would I play?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
You know what?
AJ Holiday 2.0
I can see you as Mr. Darcy.
Sophie Cunningham
You got a little Colin Firth.
AJ Holiday
Okay, that's really sweet. I appreciate that. But are you sure I'm not the dad? I'm not Mr. Bennett.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Here.
AJ Holiday
Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart audiobook book club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Richard Sherman from the Richard Sherman podcast. Ready or not is the tactical first person shooter where you take command of a SWAT team and every decision matters. I reunited with my legion of Boom teammates, Cam Chancellor, Cliff, Averil, Michael Bennett, and Walter Thurman to go through real SWAT training and and see why over 13 million players are into this game. Watch our training now at Richard Sherman Podcast YouTube channel. This isn't mindless running gun. The game demands elite teamwork and sharp strategic thinking. Just like what the Legion of Boom brought to the field every single game. Try the limited Time free trial on PlayStation 5 and Xbox Series X and S. Play now and feel the weight of the badge.
Tam Bam
Right.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Well, it sound like you a servant.
Tam Bam
Of the Lord, because goodness. All right, I have a question. All right. What's one myth about menopause you wish women would stop believing?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
One myth about menopause? Well, this is an interesting question, because right now they're actually changing the FDA black box warning on menopause on hormone replacement therapy. So a lot of people thought that they could not utilize hormone replacement for the last 20 years due to an article that came out or a study that came out that told them, you know, it's going to kill them, they're going to get more breast cancer, cardiovascular disease, all that other stuff. So the myth is that more women are able to utilize supplements and or hormone replacement therapy medications in order to help them navigate perimenopause and menopause.
Tam Bam
So, Aria, for someone who, like me, who's like, so far away from all of this perimenopause, can you explain to me and our listeners what exactly is menopause and perimenopause? Like, what is it? Because when I'd love to start where.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So it's a change, right? And I will tell you that if you live past the A, up to the age of 60, you are going to go through the change. Just like when you were born, you went through adolescence, puberty, you're going through the change. So perimenopause, menopause is the change of our hormones. And I like to start with menopause because it's just like more of a definitive space before I get the definition of perimenopause. So menopause is when our hormone levels, estrogen, progesterone, drop to such significant lows that we no longer have our periods. So we're not menstruating for 12 months. However, there's more than 50 different symptoms that are associated with having the drop in your estrogen, progesterone and your testosterone. So menopause officially is 12 months without your period or cycle, and then after that is what people call postmenopause. But I also like to say one myth to people. Menopause lasts for the rest of your life. That is the area you are in in your life for the rest of your life. Once you stop having your periods, you're in menopause.
Tam Bam
See, I used to think it's like when you stop liking men. Men know, pause, pause on these men because of, you know.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So that's why he say that teenage Years.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So that's funny you say that because, you know, one of the symptoms of the many symptoms is you can have decreased libido, decreased desire. And I remember a few of my friends coming to me like, oh, my God, I don't know what's happening. When they hit their 40s, like, 40s was like, yes, baby, yes. They wanted to have sex, the whole thing, right. When you hit 40, and then all of a sudden, all of that energy just like, continues to wax and wane. And that's where we call the perimenopause. So prior to you going through menopause, which means you're not having periods anymore, the perimenopause is that time before. And that time before can be anywhere from five to 10 years prior to your actual menopause. Most people go through, like, the stage change, that one year between the ages of 48 and 52. Right. But that time before that, that is that perimenopausal time. And, you know, a lot of people think about fertility, right? So their reproductive time. So that perimenopause, you can still get pregnant. Your hormones are just like, doing this. Yeah, so your hormones are doing. And it's just like I tell people, the way we start is the way we end. So if you had puberty, if you remember puberty, that's what perimenopause is like as well.
Tam Bam
So I got. So that's why, Ari, I've never had a zit in my fucking life, excuse my French, but all of a sudden I got zits on my jawline. Is that a symptom of Perry perhaps?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yep. So estrogen. So estrogen, the decrease in estrogen, progesterone, testosterone. Right. Remember I told you there's 50 different symptoms or more that people can have? Now, estroge is in every part of our body. Our skin, our hair, our brains, our heart, everywhere is estrogen. So when you're starting to see things start happening, and then also depending on what you're doing for your nutrition. And I recommend people to eat what we call the Viva Life 5. Fruits, vegetables, nuts, grains, beans, drinking our water. And if you eat meat, then make sure it's, you know, high quality, as clean as possible. But if you're. If you are eating outside of those things, you're going to see your body respond even more to having this decrease in estrogen. So that is what is going on. Your hormone levels are dropping and you are starting to see the. Our bodies respond, our tissues respond, our organs respond to that.
Tam Bam
Should we be taking, like, Estrogen. Sorry.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So it. It is. That is a very personal conversation. So every single person should have that conversation with their provider. We have to think about what's your family history, what's your personal history. And there are certain things that if you are active, like if you have active breast cancer. No, we're not gonna give you hormone replacement. Right, we may, and sometimes we can do something local to the vagina, but that's one of those things we have to have that conversation about if you have excessive, I mean, excuse me, uncontrolled hypertension, we have to have a conversation about that because the cardiovascular risk could increase depending on what your cardiovascular risks are. So it's not that it's a complete. No, but we have to have a conversation with you about your personal history in order to recommend.
Tam Bam
All right, now hold on. You said you could do something to the vagina. What is that? Tighten it, make it more wet. Like, what is it?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
For show. For show. So as you know, your vagina is very, like, responsive to estrogen. So the estrogen, collagen, the juiciness, all of that. Right. We need to make sure that we are able to keep that, like you said, moist and wet, if that's what you so choose and how you so choose to use it. One thing I tell people, and this is a. I don't know if it's a myth or. Well, it's a truth on my basis. If you don't use it, you will lose it. Okay? So the point of the matter is.
Tam Bam
Don'T worry about that.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I definitely gotta use my coochie.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I'll go through, like, spurts where I don't.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
But.
Tam Bam
So what I say is, if I'm.
AJ Holiday 2.0
A human, I don't like you.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
We gotta make sure it's clean, healthy, and as wet as you want it to be. Right? So that being said, if you need to utilize a vaginal moisturizer, you can use that, right? So we have replacements for that. We also can use vaginal estrogen locally so that you can continue to keep that area, like I said, healthy and moist. Because besides getting the itchy, scratchy vagina, as long as you don't have any inflammation or infection associated with it, you can also have what we call urinary tract infect what seems like to be urinary tract infections. And what we call that is the genitourinary syndrome, or symptoms of menopause perimenopause. And that's because those estrogen levels are so low and it's dry. And now you're getting all of these symptoms associated that seem like urinary tract infections, but may or may not be.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Well, do you have all these things for like men libido. Right, but there. So we have creams, right. Like you're saying, but do we have a Viagra type pill for women's libido? It's like everything is catered to men prolonging their, I don't know, sexual appetite.
Tam Bam
Sexual appetite, yeah.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So actually there are, there are medications for women that help them improve their libido, their sex drive, also like I said, improve their vaginal moisture, the elasticity of your entire body as far as your skin and everything like that. So yeah, they're coming, they're on the market. They're not talked about as much, but they are, you know, more and more are coming out. And especially like I said, we have this at the health and human services level now. We have some really powerful obgyn, neurogynecology advocates that are there in Congress and making sure these things are moving forward. So we have, you know, we have different opportunities for different people. So you know, it's not just a one stop shop hormone replacement therapy. When we talk about estrogen replacement, that is definitely the, the therapy that is going to help you with your hot flashes. That's like the, the gold standard to help prevent the hot flashes, which is what most people hear about. But then there are other opportunities for us as well if you don't want to use estrogen based or progesterone based products.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Is this true or false? Like, does having a hysterectomy cause perimenopause or menopause earlier? Like that stage to happen early? Because when you talk about knowing your family history and stuff like that. I don't know a woman in my family who's not over, you know, 50, who have, have not already had a hysterectomy from my mom, aunts, older cousins. So I can't pinpoint was what. Like I, I am always happy when I see my period.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Right? Right.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So yeah, I love seeing my period because I mean I'm still, I'm still youthful, I can still get pregnant. Pop that coochie. I can do all things. Okay, but how do you know when everybody, like I don't know when my mom would have went through menopause. Especially now you're saying like when menopause.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Starts, it doesn't stop.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Like that's just the rest of your life is menopause right now. I don't know the difference between PMS and menopause with these old ladies.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah, I understand. I understand. It's mean.
Tam Bam
Yeah.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So ask your question again. Because I got in, you know, with the. Pop the. I got thrown off with the pot. Sorry.
Sophie Cunningham
I'm sorry.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Pop the coochie.
Tam Bam
Cause listen, is women in menopause still popping their coochie? Don't get hoops. Absolutely.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Which is why I need to mention this, that we still need to. Even though people are like, oh, I can't get pregnant because I've gone through menopause, my eggs have run out, the likelihood of me getting pregnant is very, very low. But I never put anything past the higher power. We still need to prevent STDs, so gonorrhea, chlamydia, herpes, hepatitis, HIV. So because people are living longer, stronger and thriving past their 50s, we still need to prevent all of that, but.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Go back through menopause quicker. Right?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Oh, with hysterectomy.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yes. That's what.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So it's interesting because hysterectomy means removal of the uterus. But if you ask a woman if you've had a hysterectomy, many of them don't know whether or not they got their ovaries and partial and uterus removed. Right. So it's not even a partial hysterectomy. The removal of the ovaries is called a oophorectomy. That's what it's called. The removal of the tubes is called a salpingectomy. The removal of the uterus is called a hysterectomy. So, yes, you have to very much get into the nuance with people about that. Now, sometimes when you remove the uterus, some of the blood flow that would be going to the ovaries decreases. So people can see the changes. Like I said, you can have some perimenstrual. Excuse me, you can have some perimenopause symptoms that seem to come on maybe not faster, but because you have decreased blood flow, you're getting those type. Those same type of symptoms. It's more when that estrogen level is gone. So if you have your ovaries removed, then, yes, no longer are you. Yes, you are in medical or surgical menopause right then and there. So you can have surgical menopause, meaning that I took out your ovaries or decreased the significant flow to your ovaries. You can have medical menopause, which means I gave you medication to stop the function of your ovaries. Or you can have natural menopause, where you've just matured and aged into menopause. And that is a good question because so many people are like, well, I have my uterus taken out. I don't know if I'm gone through menopause. If you listen to your body, you will absolutely know when you stop cycling. But we have to be in tune with our bodies. And that's why I teach a lot about mindset and knowing yourself from the inside out.
Tam Bam
I had a friend, she was fighting breast cancer and she said that she was going into early menopause because of the medicine. Is that, does that happen from chemotherapy will send you into early menopause.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So that's what we call medical menopause. So yes, you can actually end up starting to have the symptoms. You can fully go into menopause or you can go into a state of, you know, stopping where those medications are stopping the hormones from functioning that they normally do. And that's the whole purpose, especially when you have an estrogen or progesterone positive breast cancer. So you can either be paused or you can actually fully go into menopause. And everybody is a little bit different. How they respond to those therapies and medications.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Is that like medication that kind of. I was going to say, don't they have like a medication that can like, basically if you're going through chemo that can like guard your, your eggs.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Correct. So they do put you on medications that can help, like I said, make that pause happen so that it can help protect. Right. But we don't know until you come off of all the medications whether or not what functionality you're gonna have.
Tam Bam
And that's typically not something that they're just gonna do for you. You gotta pay for that. Right, like, because.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Well, no, that a lot of times is a part of your therapy. And they should be having that conversation with women in regards to how do I protect my ovaries, how do I continue to maintain my fertility? And also. And then I'm thinking you're talking about potentially egg harvesting. So when I harvest my eggs so that I can save them, so that I can use. They're either in my uterus or womb or somebody else's.
Tam Bam
And that brings me to my next question. Does stress play a part in how quickly your body goes into the change?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Did you know Tide has been upgraded to provide an even better clean in cold water?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Tide is specifically designed to fight any.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Stain you throw at it. Even in cold butter. Yep. Chocolate ice cream.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Sure thing. Barbecue sauce. Tide's got you covered.
AJ Holiday 2.0
You don't need to use warm water. Additionally, Tide pods let you confidently fight.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Tough stains with new coldzyme technology. Just remember, if it's gotta be clean, it's gotta be Tide.
AJ Holiday
What a matchup we got, y'.
Tam Bam
All.
AJ Holiday
This is that classic HBCU vibe. Non stop action. The band is rockin' and the crab lit chance. Echo drum beat. Everybody's favorite, showing that school pride. Game like this. Yeah, it calls for an ice cold Coca Cola. Ah, crisp and refreshing. That's a game changer right there. Yeah, that taste always hits the right note. Just like the band at halftime. And just like that, we're back at it. Passionate fans, school colors everywhere. And an ice cold Coca Cola. That's a winning combo no matter the sport, no matter the yard. Everybody knows fan work is thirsty work. So grab a Coca Cola and keep that HBCU pride going. You've been working in the garage with your dad every week, Monday to Sunday, trying to get the old school up and running. Today, after all the hard work, y' all finally finished it. So you have that feeling of accomplishment. You did it. Then your dad throws you the keys. He says those three magic words. All yours, son. Yep. Same car that belonged to your grandpa and that your dad helped him fix. It's yours. Three generations right there, keeping the tradition alive. But if you ask dad to really keep the tradition going, you need to get insurance. And you already know you need to get State Farm. Because your agent, well, he gets tradition, too. His dad was an agent, his grandpa too. So he gets you generation to generation. Remember to choose the ages that your family counted on. Like a good neighbor, State Farm is there.
Sophie Cunningham
This is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something. Do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or osa, in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snored loudly, or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at don't sleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lilly, A medicine company.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Hey, audiobook lovers. This week on the podcast I'm sitting down with musician, producer and walking encyclopedia Questlove.
AJ Holiday
We're talking about Mark Ronson's memoir, Night.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
How to be a DJ in 90s New York City. All right, like we talked about before, Mark Ronson found sanctuary in the DJ booth. What's A tool or piece of equipment in the studio or on stage that gives you the most control.
AJ Holiday
So I have two microphones on stage. We have the microphone that you hear as the audience. Then we have a second microphone in which we communicate with each other. I feel like that second microphone kind of saved all of our friendships. No band likes each other after 20 years or 25 years. Like the Beatles broke up in seven and a half years, and we're going on 35.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Listen to Earsay, the Audible and iHeart.
AJ Holiday
Audiobook Club on the iHeartradio app or.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Wherever you get your podcasts. Absolutely, absolutely. I think that especially for black women, we are known to go through menopause, perimenopause about eight months to a year earlier than women.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Women, our counterpart.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Right. Non women of color, I guess you could say Caucasian women. However you want to say so. Yeah. And I do believe that that is associated with the amount of stress and weight that we carry from racism, structural racism, discrimination, prejudice, and then just having the weight of the world on our shoulders. You know, the financial responsibilities, the mental and emotional responsibilities that we carry more than most people do.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Stop stressing. Yeah, it's gonna get old fast.
Tam Bam
And that's another reason why that's the only thing.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
You probably get older faster, but you won't look it. I know, right?
Tam Bam
And a lot of people are like.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Oh, I don't look my age. And yeah, it's true. Many times we don't look our age because I think that genetically we have develop protective mechanisms so that we don't age in the same way that other people age. But I will tell you, if you are smoking and if you are, you know, significantly, if you're obese, significantly overweight, if you are not managing your cardiovascular health, diabetes, it doesn't matter, you know, if you're not doing those things, you're gonna look older than you should. Amen to that.
Tam Bam
That's what I was gonna ask. Like, when you. How does fitness. Like, how should we change our fitness when we're going to perimenopause? Because I assume our metabolisms and things like that are affected by this as well. So is there a.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Absolutely. So it's slow. Your metabolisms are slowing down. And so what I tell people is encourage young people already to exercise, whatever that is. If it's dancing, dancing, Zumba ing, whatever it is, Pilates, running, hiking, biking, getting out there and walking, make sure you are doing that. So young, if you're young, put your kids in some type of sports and make them do it, as you mature, continue doing that, find your community so that you can enjoy exercise. We should be exercising five to six times a week, if not seven. Right. Even if the seventh day is going for a walk. But we should be exercising, enjoying that. And then as you are aging, you should be increasing your strength exercises. So that is why even doing resistance bands is so important. So adding weights, you don't have to add, you know, significantly heavy weights. You don't have to lift 100, 200 pounds, you don't have to do that. You can lift 20, 30 pounds. You can lift your own body weight. I mean, you know, you weigh 120, 160 pounds or more.
AJ Holiday 2.0
No, I never been able to lift my body weight since I was in elementary. I can never do a pull up.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah, so be on there. But you know, we start with, we start with doing push ups. So in the morning when I wake up, I do my body scan. And this is part of my Viva Life program that I do. But I wake up, I do my body scan and I ask myself, you know, what's going on in my body from the top of my head down to the sole of my feet and how do I focus my energy so that I can heal that space. Then I get down on the floor, I do my calisthenics, and that's pushups, that's crunches, that's stretches. And I know it sounds funny, right? So I don't know. My mom watched Jack Lalanne and you know, I did Taebo when I was in my 20s and 30s. Whatever you need to do to keep moving and to keep that body, you know, strong, those are the things that we need to do.
Tam Bam
I remember one time I went to this female doctor and I was putting on weight and I was like, but I just don't have time.
AJ Holiday 2.0
My life is too busy.
Tam Bam
I just travel and I work in two different cities and I just don't have time. And she was like, I'm a mother of five, I'm a wife, I have this practice and I still find time every morning to get up and go to the gym. So what were you saying?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And then it becomes my hair and all that other stuff. No, I schedule it. So one of the things my family knows is the first hour of the day is mine. That's where I meditate, journal and get my exercise in. And then for the rest of the day, I'm optimizing my nutrition, my hormones and my sleep. And I get my sleep. And so you're talking to an OBGYN who used to do 36 hour shifts and still got her workout in. Because it just makes you feel better mentally and emotionally. And of course it's going to help the physical aspects, your heart health, prevent diabetes, prevent significant weight gain, all of that.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yeah. The crazy thing is I have a consultation today at a weightlifting gym.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All right.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yeah, because I, I, I go to the gym, but I don't be knowing what I'm doing half the time. Right. And I want to like, I just don't want shit to move no more. I want the body to stay kind of like the same size, but I don't want no more jiggle.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah, I understand. And that can happen. And so you're being intentional about what you do and how you do it because you don't have to be in the gym for 22 hours. You don't have to do that.
AJ Holiday 2.0
It's a discipline and consistency for me, man. I just got to get some discipline in my life.
Tam Bam
Yep. Listen, I will, I will. I did 75 hard earlier this year and I was going to the gym twice a day for 75 days straight. And then right after that I did 75 fat, like right behind me fuck around again.
AJ Holiday 2.0
75. You better cut it out.
Tam Bam
I struggle with the consistencies, like just staying with it, that's my hardest part I can do. I do the workouts, I know the workouts, I know the routines, I know how to lift weights. But just going for life, a lifestyle change is what I struggle with. That is, that is my kryptonite. So I don't, I totally understand.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And that's one thing that we have just incorporated in my life. You know, like I said, it's on my calendar. Don't mess with me. And even if I can't get like a hard workout in, I'm going to do something even, you know, walking something to get my mind going. Like right now I don't feel like going to the gym, but I'm out there every morning and I'm walking two and a half miles and I'm going up hills and I'm using the resistance bands doing the push ups and the sit ups, so. Or crunches.
Tam Bam
Excuse me, girl, I'm gonna go in a little while, I think today.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And you gotta be in a community, right? So if you're in a community of people that this is what they do. So that's what my viva lifers and I do. Like, we encourage each other to do all of these things and it's not really like me saying you need to go, it's them seeing me go, like, I'm out there, and I'm like, hey, y'.
Tam Bam
All.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
What y' all doing? You know? And next thing you know, everybody else is out doing something too.
Tam Bam
Right?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That's.
Tam Bam
You done encouraged me to get my ass up today and go. Cause I wasn't gonna go. Cause. But I'm gonna go just because you said that. And let me ask you this. I never, like, I never heard of perimenopause. I heard of menopause growing up, but perimenopause was never a thing. Is that.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I just started hearing about it the last.
Tam Bam
Is it a new concept?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
No, not at all. I mean, you know, I will tell you, when I first started hearing about it was about 20 years ago when Oprah was on with Dr. Hill. I think her name was Hildebrandt or Hilda Greth. But she. They talked about what women need to know about Sex was the book. And so it was a whole. I mean, Oprah did a whole thing on menopause, just like she's doing now in perimenopause. But I will tell you, when I. Even when I was going through training, you know, you grow up and they tell you you're gonna have your period, and they tell you don't get pregnant. Right. But they don't tell you anything between that or about that. When I was going through my ob GYN training, we got the graphs that said this. What happens with estrogen, progesterone, testosterone. I will be honest with you. It's not until you hit the different stages that you're like, oh, this is what they were talking about. So the reason why you feel like it hasn't been talked about is, number one, they stopped talking about it, especially after that whole Women's Health initiative, because they didn't want people to be on hormonal replacement. Right. The other thing is, it's coming up. You're going into the time of your life, or other people are going into the time of their life where they're starting to feel these things. So you're more interested in it. Like, we don't talk about how to get pregnant until you're trying to get pregnant. Right. So same thing. You're not going to talk about perimenopause until you're going through the experience.
Tam Bam
Right.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So what's some. Like, what are some of the symptoms that women may mistake for something else, but it's perimenopause.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah. So these are important things. I'm going to start with the heart. Right. So a Lot of people actually end up getting heart palpitations, anxiety, and sometimes some shortness of breath, chest pain. But we also have to make sure that we're ruling out what could kill you. Right. So we gotta make sure that it's not a heart attack. We gotta make sure that is not some other kind of arrhythmia or changes in your heart rate. So. But those are some of the things a lot of people get. Palpitations, anxiety associated with perimenopause, menopause. The other thing is people will notice that their weight changes. So they start getting what we call the minnow belly or that midriff weight gain. What do they call it? The oompha, the pumpha, whatever it's called. But, you know, yeah, so the muffin top. So you start getting that and people are like, wait a second, what's going on with that? And so we have to make sure. Are you having a gastrointestinal problem that's going along with that? Is this fibroids? That's potentially going on. So going back to the head to toe exam is very important. And what I've noticed in primary care is we've gotten away from examining people so that we can make a differential diagnosis. Means, what could this be? And what more likely is this? People also start having joint pains, and so they're like, uncle Arthur is here, right? So they think they have arthritis, but it's actually inflammation because the estrogen actually moisturizes our joints, helps moisturize that. So, you know, those are some of the symptoms besides the hot flashes, vaginal dryness, mood swings. Mood swings are huge. But we have to figure out, is this depression? You know, is this truly depression? Do you have a bipolar exacerbation or is this associated with perimenopause or menopause? So those are so extremes. So.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So people going through perimenopause get, like, bipolar symptoms.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
They can, yeah. I mean, if you. If you ask, like, my best friend called me, she was like, I don't know what's going on with my. My mom. And a lot of men will tell you this, too. A lot of men will tell you this too. They're like, man, I don't know what's going on with her, but she seemed like. And then the other thing is, as you mature, you can also, you know, add. People can get the, you know, focus deficits. And you hear me saying, because you get brain fog and you can't figure out what words you're supposed to say. So then some people are thinking, they're going through Alzheimer's. Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So, yeah, I be feeling like that sometimes. But like I said before we started recording, like, I had. I mentioned this last week, too, I had a physical done, and I'm like, super iron deficient, but that can also cause, like, the brain fog tiredness. So I never once thought I was going through the change, though, but I knew something was going on.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
But remember, you are going through change constantly. Our bodies are constantly changing, even on a blood change. Yeah, but you are. I mean, if you are in your 40s, you are going through the change. You just haven't got to the big part of the change. You're going through these small minute portions of the change. But, yeah, you're going through the change. So.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Okay, can you. Can you. Like, as long as you have your period, that means you're not in perimenopause and you're not in menopause.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So as long as you have your period. So let me put it this way. As long as you're continuing to consistently have your period, then you are not in menopause.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Okay.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
But you can still be perimenopausal. So the time prior to you stopping your period for that 12 months is called perimenopause. Now, one thing I want to say, because some people will stop their periods for the 12 months and then have a period that needs to be investigated for endometrial cancer. Yeah, we have to investigate that. So if you stop having your period. Yeah, if you stop your period for 12 months and all of a sudden you start having bleeding, spotting, or anything like that, then that needs to be evaluated.
Tam Bam
Because it could be a form of cancer.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
It could be. And it could be, you know, that depending on where you are, you can have significant stressors that trigger something. You have this cortisol response. You're, you know, and then you unfortunately start having bleeding. Especially in women in fibroids. I've seen that happen to them where they have the fibroids. And even though in menopause they should be shrinking, but you're having some significant stressors going on, and for some reason, you've triggered your hormonal milieu and it actually caused you to bleed. But even in that instance, I still make sure I'm ruling out endometrial cancer.
Tam Bam
Do women. Because I feel like black women get fibroids more than our counterparts and things like that. Does that affect how quick you go into peri and menopause when you have fibroids?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So fibroids doesn't affect that, however, your hormonal changes will affect the fibroids. So that's why you see women having, you know, growth of the fibroids. That's why you also see them having these heavy, unbearable periods associated with fibroids. So that is all the fibroids are hormonally impacted. So that's why you see some of the changes that are going on. I wouldn't say that having fibroids puts you into perimenopause faster. Remember, that is very much based on your brain hormones and your ovaries and that communication between both.
Tam Bam
Why do you think that black women get fibroids more than other people?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah. So you know what? I'll be honest with you. Part of that is the stressors that we are taking on, because estrogen doesn't just live in our ovaries. It lives in the adipose tissue as well. Cortisol responses from stressors, what we're eating, what our environments are, and then what our genetic history is. Oh, for example, my family, they all have. Many people in my family have had fibroids. I've never had fibroids. I actually get my ultrasound done to make sure that they check for fibroids. But I've also been on progesterone for almost my entire Life through my IUD. I also, like I said, practiced the Viva Life 5 for my entire. Almost my entire life, even before I named what it was. That's what I do. And so minimizing that stress, making sure environmentally that I am you know, not in environments that could probably trigger the hormonal responses or growth as well as what I'm eating. So food is your medicine as well.
Tam Bam
Do you use seasoning salt? Do you use seasoning salt? Because I just think Lawry's is what's giving us fibroids.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Y' all stop using. So do I. Do I use seasoning salt sparingly? I would say yes, I do. You know, I grew up. I'm Lowry's, too, but I use it very sparingly. So if you come eat at my house, you may feel like the food might be a little bit more bland than you used to. But that being said, you know, I don't have hypertension, I don't have diabetes, I'm not overweight, and I'm doing this intentionally. So it's really important to. When you're seasoning your food to make sure that we're minimizing the sodium that's attached to it.
Tam Bam
I swear, y', all, over the years, my mama's Food is still good, but it tastes more like white people food because she don't use salt like that no more. She don't fry no more. She don't. Everything is changing, but I'm, you know, I'm adopting that a little bit. Okay. Yeah, so.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So, I mean, just taking out fried foods, right. Will make such a big difference. And what I tell people is if you do it more than 90% of the time, my colleague says 80% of the time. But if you eat, you know, on that, clean eating more than 90% of the time or even 85% of the time, you're going to be so much better off than most people in America.
Tam Bam
Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
What is Viva Life 5 you've mentioned twice now.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So the plus stands for Live Viva means Live Life. And what we're trying to do is help people live their healthiest and wealthiest life spiritually.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Spiritually advocates for women getting money.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Okay.
Tam Bam
Oh, yeah.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All day, we leave no bags on the table.
Tam Bam
Okay.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So spiritually, physically, financially, mentally, and emotionally. And essentially what this entails is you get myself and my fellow consultants to help you through webinars, podcasts, affirmation rooms. So that's the mindfulness piece. Journaling, meditating, and incorporating that exercise, hormone, nutrition, and making sure that you sleep. So it's a community that we've created in order for you to do five things pretty much every day and eat those five foods. Fruits, vegetables, nuts, grains, beans, drinking out water, and if you eat meat, make sure it's clean and high quality. Do you eat meat? I do eat meat. I make sure. I try to make sure it's clean and high quality. Now, that might be the 10% that I'm not doing correct all the time, but yeah, I try to make sure that we're eating high quality or minimizing it. You know what I'm saying? I don't eat meat every single day.
Tam Bam
Do you eat pork at all?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I do. I went through the whole phase of not eating pork at all. And I did. I went through the whole, you know, like, it was funny.
Tam Bam
I went to college, right?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I went to Xavier University in New Orleans, Louisiana. I went to hbcu. And I was like, I'm not gonna eat meat. And I got there and I had no money, so you had to eat in the cafeteria. And guess what they put out every Friday?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Pork chop bacon.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Like, it's like all you can eat bacon.
Tam Bam
I was like, yeah, I'm gonna eat some of that. Listen, every time I meet someone over 100, I asked them, do they eat Pork.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And they say, yes.
Tam Bam
I ain't met a person yet over 100 that said they don't eat no pork.
AJ Holiday 2.0
It's not about the pork, though. Like, the food just isn't what it used to be when they were our age.
Tam Bam
Right.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So that's just like, I don't eat.
AJ Holiday 2.0
A lot of things. Yeah, it's just not the same.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I don't eat a lot of pork. If I do eat any, I eat fish, I eat beef, High quality beef. And then if I eat pork, if I be a pork chop, right? So. But it's not fried and all that other stuff, but everything in moderation and choose where you're gonna be. Another big thing is alcohol. So minimizing your alcohol is very important through perimenopause and menopause. You know, people say one or two drinks a day, and I'm like, ooh, that seems like a lot. But I would say minimize it to like, one or two drinks a week would be better. And if you're noticing that you're needing to drink every single day, then we'll probably need to talk about whether or not there's some alcoholism tendencies that are going on in your life. But that will. Alcohol will exacerbate all the symptoms for a lot of people.
Tam Bam
As I get older, I find that I used to have fun, a lot of fun, with alcohol, but as I get older, I just feel like it makes me sick. I don't feel good anymore when I drink it. I don't. It takes me like three days to get better after just having two or three drinks. So does that have something to do with Our body's changing too? Like, I can't drink liquor the same.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yep, absolutely. Absolutely. And then the thing is, you know, a little bit of red wine is okay, right? Not the whole bottle and not the glass that fills up with the whole bottle. Yeah, I'll let you see the whole one glass is a whole bottle.
Tam Bam
No, we're not doing that.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
But a little bit of red wine. And you know, I like whiskey, so I might have Sir Davis a couple times in the month. And, you know, that's what I do. I understand what my 90% is. And understanding that I also understand little things in my body that tells me, you know, what, you getting out of parameters? So if my legs. My thighs start, like, touching each other a little bit, I'm like, I'm out of parameters.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So my thigh was five.
Tam Bam
My thighs have never not touched. Stop touching. I might be sick, you know?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Well, and you just gotta know I Can tell when I gain five pounds. Like I know when I'm, I know my exact weight because I understand my body. And like you said, you travel a lot. So we retain a lot of water and there's some retention there. Right. So it takes a good four to five days to get that water, just to get that water weight off. And you have to be very intentional about that. So, you know, hydrating, sometimes a little apple cider vinegar, sometimes I'll do a little bit of castor oil, olive oil, you know, just to make sure that I'm keeping my gut clean. Healthy is really important.
Tam Bam
So I, I do hair and I. What made me bring this conversation to like want to have this conversation is so my clients are aging with me and a lot of them are in their late 30s, early 40s to 50s. I don't have that many 20 somethings anymore. I have some, but not that many. And I kept hearing the conversation about perimenopause. Perimenopause. And I had one of my clients particularly say that she was concerned because her vagina is dry now. She's like, I don't know, like I used to be pouring a glass of water out of me and now it's like a Sahara desert. Like it's tumbleweeds rolling by when I pull my coochie out. Is there something that.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
People could write?
Tam Bam
Is it the wild, wild west? Is there something because women can do or eat? She's like, I'm drinking water, I drink hella water, I'm eating fruit. Is there something that we could do or something that women can take to make sure that their vagina, they keep it, their wetness as long as possible when they're going through these changes.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah, so. So I will say always green leafy vegetables are very important. Right. So making sure that you're keeping your vitamin D, your iron levels up as well as they're gonna have what we call adaptogens and nutrients that are gonna help you keep that collagen, sometimes some phytoestrogens and things like that. But then also she can utilize basic things, some olive oil, a little bit of olive oil, dab of olive oil or coconut oil in the area and the vaginal area could be very helpful. There's also products that kind of like, there's a product called Replenze, but essentially that is a lubricant she can use. But I'll be honest with you, estrogen based products are like the best thing that you can use. If you're okay with using estrogen, place it in, in your vagina, small amount in your vagina a couple times a week and it will help you significantly. Important thing though, if you're finding that you're using estrogen, especially you're taking it by mouth or you have it on a patch, or you're even using it in your vagina like every single day, then we need to talk about if you still have a uterus using the progesterone as well. Because we want to protect against that endometrial cancer that we talked about.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I started taking maca. You take maca?
Tam Bam
Yeah. It's good, yeah?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Oh, absolutely. Helps with the libido. Yes, ma'. Am. Yes. Ashwagandha maca. Let's go.
AJ Holiday 2.0
It's like a, like a Peruvian, like root. It's a plant basically. Like ginger, like root. Yeah. But they, it comes and it tastes really good too. It tastes like, like a, like a nut. So if you put it like in a, in a smoothie or something like that, it has like a peanut buttery flavor. It's real good.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah. And then, so I remember when I was having, you know, being at work and everything all the time when I was breastfeeding my child, fenugreek was another one. And fenugreek is another plant based supplement that you can use to help you moisturize, right. And it helps you produce milk. So that, that's another type of thing that milk thistle, fenugreek. So there's, if you work with an integrative specialist or a naturopath, they'll be able to give you more options in regards to more plant based therapies rather than just, you know, estrogen is the only thing you can use in your organization.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Is that what you push towards more, the holistic? You know, because in the medical industry they want to push medicine. It's pharmakia.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Okay.
AJ Holiday 2.0
That's the real, real witchcraft as far as I'm concerned. Right. So they push more, you know, pharmaceutical medication as opposed to the, the organic. There's really not a lot of doctors out there that, you know, I, I was just at the doctor recently and I told her I do black seed oil for my blood pressure. And you know, she immediately went into, well, you know, the studies and all this other, you know, trying to deter you from doing more holistic alternatives. So is that, is that what you lean more towards as opposed to like traditional medicine?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Right. So I'm, I'm about all, all of it. Right. I try to make sure that people know their options, whether they are non pharmaceutical or pharmaceutical. But I also try to make sure that people understand the risk benefits of each. Because if we're talking about it, you know, many things are plant based. Even if they are FDA approved or through the pharmacy, many things are plant based. If you're compounding something, then guess what, a lot of times you're using some type of plant based. So I think it's really important, and I'll be honest with you, in traditional medicine, they don't teach this portion of supplements, plant based medications or therapies.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So which is coming at y' all the real here.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So that's why it's important. Like I was saying, you know, look behind the name and say, are you a functional medicine physician? Have you gotten your naturopathic training? Whether it's a certification or you're an actual naturopathic doctor? And how do you put both of those things together? What are my alternatives besides using what I can get from a pharmacy? So give me non pharmacy and pharmacy associated therapies that can be useful for me. I believe in acupuncture, chiropractic. I've done all these things, so I absolutely know that I don't have to be in pain. And excuse me, I don't have to take pain medications to resolve my pain. There's other options for it as well.
AJ Holiday 2.0
The pain. Not my pain. The pain. The pain.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Let's not take that in our. Let's not take that in our bodies, right?
Tam Bam
So I feel like I've always had a healthy sexual appetite, but it feels like since I turned 40, like now I'm like, who's calling my phone? Who's calling my phone?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Like, I'm waking up.
Tam Bam
I'm like horny, like all the time. Is that like something that happens before, Perry? Is that like normal or is. Is.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So I remember I told you in perimenopause, your hormones are doing this, right? So you're going through this wax and wane, so you're really feeling so. And also, I told you, perimenopause in many ways is just like puberty. And what happened in puberty, you found yourself, you found all of that hotness. So that's one of the things that you can actually experience. And that's why you got to be careful taking certain things, like maca, right? If you take maca, you go. You might elevate or take it from men too.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Like it helps men's libido too.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah, absolutely. So I go through them and I.
Tam Bam
Shouldn'T take no maca right now because.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I might Just have to be careful.
Tam Bam
Even I'm a chandelier, if I take.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Some of that shit, I feel like, yeah, you have to be careful. You have to be careful about it. And so that's why having that personal line conversation and say, okay, what symptoms are you with experiencing and what do you want to temper or what do you want to improve? I think the biggest thing about, you know, anything that you decide to take, you should be taking it because it's supplementing what is going on in your body. So like you said, you might not need maka root, but you might need something to help you with stress or calm you down. So, you know, that's something that's a different opportunity for you. I will say somebody asked me, do I have to take hormone replacement therapy, estrogen replacement therapy, progesterone, if you stub a uterus? And I will say that the number one killer of women, especially black women, is cardiovascular disease point blank. Hypertension, stroke, arrhythmias. Right? And so what has been found is that the estrogen, the replacement, is reducing the cardiovascular disease. Now you gotta do all the other things, too. So if you so choose not to take the replacement, then you really gotta do all the other things. When we talk about the stress reduction, the exercise, the nutrition and the sleep, and we really need to get our sleep, ladies. I mean, there is nothing wrong with sleeping.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I love to lay down. Okay. I keep saying I'm making T shirts that say that I love to lay down. I get my sleep. I don't know if it's always restful, though.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I do have hot flashes at night sometimes. I be hot as hell at night.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah. And so those are the hormonal changes we talking about. But back to your question about the sex. If you're feeling hot and horny, I think it's okay. I mean, I will say, when I was in my early 40s, that was the best time of my life, baby. I was like, this is it. I've been missing this. You know, I was away from my husband, I was deployed when I was pregnant with my child. So I didn't get like that, like, pregnancy sex that everybody was talking about. I didn't get all of that. But, baby, when I turned 40, it was on topic.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Goodness, this is crazy.
Tam Bam
It feels like I'm crazy right now.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
It's great. It's wonderful. Embrace it. Got me going with some crazy ride now. Yes.
AJ Holiday 2.0
That I definitely be horny, man. I don't want it to stop, though.
Tam Bam
I don't want to stop.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So that's why we have no time for.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I don't want it to stop. No, absolutely not.
Tam Bam
Okay.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That's why we're having this conversation, so that we can prevent it from staffing.
AJ Holiday 2.0
My doctor asked me the other day if I still get a period. I'm like, yes, the I do. Yeah, I'm happy about it. I need to see my every month.
AJ Holiday
What a matchup we got, y'. All. This is that classic HBCU vibe. Non stop action. The band is rocking and the crowd lit. Chance echo, drum beat. Everybody showing that school pride. Game like this.
Tam Bam
Yeah.
AJ Holiday
It calls for an ice cold Coca Cola. Ah, Chris. And refresher. That's a game changer right there. Yeah, that taste always hits the right note. Just like the band at halftime. And just like that, we're back at it. Passionate fans, school colors everywhere. And an ice cold Coca Cola. That's a winning combo no matter the sport, no matter the yard. Everybody knows fan work is thirsty work. So grab a Coca Cola and keep that HBCU pride going. You've been working in the garage with your dad every week, Monday to Sunday, trying to get the old school up and running. Today, after all the hard work, y' all finally finished it. So you have that feeling of accomplishment. You did it. Then your dad throws you the keys. He says those three magic words. All yours, son. Yup. Same car that belonged to your grandpa and that your dad helped him fix. Next, it's yours. Three generations right there. Keeping the tradition alive. But if you ask dad to really keep the tradition going, you need to get insurance. And you already know you need to get State Farm. Because your agent, well, he gets tradition, too. His dad was an agent, his grandpa, too. So he gets you generation to generation. Remember to choose the ages that your family counted on. Like a good neighbor. State Farm is there.
Sophie Cunningham
This is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something. Do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or OSA in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snored loudly, or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability, and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at don't sleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lily, A medicine company.
AJ Holiday
Hey, everyone. Ed Helms here. And hi, I'm Cal Penn, and we're the hosts of Earsay, The Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club. This week on the podcast, I am sitting down with Jenny Garfield, host of the I Heart podcast. I choose me to discuss the new Audible adaptation of the timeless Jane Austen classic Pride and Prejudice. This is not a trick question. There's no wrong answer. What role would I play?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
You know what?
AJ Holiday 2.0
I can see you as Mr. Darcy.
Sophie Cunningham
You got a little Colin Firth.
AJ Holiday
Okay, that's really sweet. I appreciate that. But are you sure I'm not the dad? I'm not Mr. Bennett. Here, listen to Earsay the Audible and iHeart Audiobook Club on the iHeartradio app or wherever you get your podcasts. This is Richard Sherman from the Richard Sherman Podcast. Let me tell you about Ready or Not, the tactical first person shooter where you take command of a SWAT team and and feel the weight of the badge. Recently, I reunited with my Legion of Boom teammates, Cliff Averill, Cam Chancer, Michael Bennett and Walter Thurman. We partnered with Ready or Not to go through actual SWAT training and film the whole experience. Watch it now at the Richard Sherman Podcast YouTube channel. Here's what makes this game different. It's not just mindless running gun. Just like the Legion of Boom built an elite defense on strategy and teamwork, Ready or Not demands the same mentality. You're commanding a SWAT team, clearing rooms, protecting civilians, making tactical calls. As a coordinated team with 18 missions that challenge you in completely different ways, every operation demands that same discipline and teamwork. Best part, try it for free for a limited time on PlayStation and Xbox. Go solo or squad up with five players in full crossplay support. If you want strategic, high stakes action that rewards elite tactics and fast thinking, then this is the game for you. Try Ready or Not for free today on PlayStation 5 and Xbox Series X.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And S. And it's really important to track your cycles, right? People used to track their periods so they can see whether or not they could get pregnant, are they pregnant, that whole thing. But it's still important to track your cycle as you're going through this. And it's not just just tracking the period, is tracking the symptoms associated with the cycle. So remember, your cycle is every 21 to 30 days. That's the cycle. The period is just the menstruation. That's just a certain part. But you know, you're gonna feel, you know, more loving and accepting at some part in your cycle. And other times you'd be like, get off of me. You know, I don't want to be bothered. So it's really important to understand that and see how many times you are feeling that through the day, because then you can start tracking your perimenopausal symptoms into menopause.
Tam Bam
What conversation should mothers and daughters be having about menopause that most of us aren't?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All of this because your children are going to experience your menopause. Probably they're going to notice something, a change in faster than you notice the change in yourself. So having these conversations with your boys and girls, or however they identify and making sure that you're having these conversations to say, you know, this is the menstrual cycle, this is the menses. This is what happens when you're in your 20s to 30s. This is what happens in your 30s to 40s, 40s and 50s beyond. But in order to have those conversations, we need to be educated about those conversations, which is why I love coming on podcasts. This is why I love having corporate sessions. So we provide six corporate sessions to corporations, organizations to improve women health in their organization. And then we do the individual discussions as well.
AJ Holiday 2.0
So you're so ko Koe. Right. Consultants is not just for corporations. Individuals can also. Right.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So the corporations. So that's why we created Viva Life, SPF Me, which is the program that's more like having the group conversation individually based. And that's where you'll get the podcast, the webinars and the coaching sessions. Right. But the corporate sessions are when we go in, we try to improve health inequities for different healthcare plans as well as if we're like, if I'm at Boeing or something like, or another corporation, then we're working with the women on the top five diseases that are happening. We're educating them so that they have a health plan. Well, what do I talk to my physician or practitioner about so that I can actually get the benefit out of this healthcare plan instead of just like paying this, you know, 100 to $1,000, $2,000 a month.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Yeah. And yes, right now it's like open enrollment and I cannot stand it. I don't know what the hell is going on half the time.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I know it's hard to figure it out. It's hard to figure it out to do those comparisons. But you know What? Go on ChatGPT, put in your information and say what health plan is best for me.
Tam Bam
Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
And you know, this is so off topic. I, I, I don't be fucking with chatgpt like that because I feel like it starts like then tracking you because it's some stuff in there that I'm like, why are you Suggesting this to me. This has nothing to do with what I just asked you about. So they have all your conversations and they know you now.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
They do. So there's a way for you to turn off. There's a way to turn off the learning piece that they can't get those conversations out into like everybody else's learning piece. Right. But there's a great person. Her name is Alicia Little. She teaches AI and she will give you all the tips, tricks, and the tools for it. But I wouldn't be afraid of it. I mean, you know, I'm prior military.
Tam Bam
Right.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I retired from the military. BEI BAE chatgpt ain't got nothing on what the military has already been doing. So it's just. It's just one of those things. Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
It has been out for 30 years. Yeah.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
So it's just one of those things. Like either you get ahead of it or it gets ahead of you. Either you are the food or you become the farmer. So just decide where you want to be with that.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I understand. Yep.
Tam Bam
All right. Is there anything that you want to tell our listeners that they need to know about Perry that is imperative that they understand about perimenopause and menopause before you go?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Absolutely. So perimenopause, menopause, it's going to happen. So don't be afraid of it happening. Be educated. Understand it. Track your cycles, track your menses, track your symptoms, talk to your family. We should know our family histories. And if you're adopted, you know, try to figure out genetically what's going on, but have these conversations. Do not be afraid of the change. And reach out to your subject matter experts that, you know, that's what we do. We trained in this. And those subject matter experts don't have to be, you know, older. Everybody you know, older doesn't know. Everybody that says OBGYN actually doesn't know. But make sure you find out those resources that you can really get that that conversation that is specific towards you. Do not be afraid of this. It can be the best time of your life as well, period.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Basically, reach out to Koe Medical Consulting. Okay.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Thank you. So, yeah.
Tam Bam
Dr. Kelly.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
OMG-R-K-E-L-L-Y-O-M D.com if you want to join, Viva Life or get some consulting services.
Tam Bam
I'm definitely gonna reach out. I want to join. I need to change how I'm living.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Because I love it.
Tam Bam
I eat bacon. A piece of bacon.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Hate to see me coming.
Tam Bam
I swear.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Now.
Tam Bam
Need to make some lifestyle changes. All Right. So we have a segment called the Dumb Story. I told you a little bit about it. So we're gonna have a commercial break. And when we come back, I want.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
You to share a story with us.
Tam Bam
All right, guys, we are back and Dr. Kelly has her story. Go ahead.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Alrighty. So when you first told me this, I was like, I mean, I ain't never been a. Right, right.
Tam Bam
Virgo.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I almost gotta ask that. What's your sign?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I'm a Virgo. Born on September 4th.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Tell the damn story. Tell a lie about how you've been pimping your whole life. Virgos are like, yeah, never got played a Virgo. Somehow they kind of twisted to where it's always in their favor. Even though I was on the phone with you, you was crying about it, but okay, two years later, you act like it didn't happen. You got it.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Go ahead, Brandon.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Thank you.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And at that September 4th Virgo as well. So that's a whole nother level. But my story is, I remember when I was in college, right, and I didn't have a car, I didn't have no money, whatever the case may be. And this guy said, you know, I want to take you out, but I wasn't the type of person that was giving out nothing. Okay, so you weren't getting anything if you weren't in a long term relationship with me. And he, we had set up to have go on a date. And I'm excited, I'm dressed, ready, the whole thing. I'm looking out the window, you know, waiting for him to call to say he was down so I can come out my dorm room. And the call never came. And I was like, what just happened? And so maybe a 36 hours later, I get a phone call like, oh, hey, you know, you know, some things came up and I was like, I was like, is your mom sick? Right? I passed away. Did you get in a car accident? And he was like, no, no, no. I was like, oh, okay. And he's like, so when you want me to pick you up? I was like, never. Click. So that was my, that was my, my story. And I got stood up for a date and that never happened again. I just needed to make sure that, you know, he wasn't dead somewhere. His mama didn't die. Because if he told me that I might have, you know, so you haven't even got.
Tam Bam
You never even found out why he missed the date.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
You ain't care why.
AJ Holiday 2.0
These Virgos, these Virgos boys. It's not a dumb bitch story. Now if you would have said that.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah.
AJ Holiday 2.0
He called again. Three weeks and three more weeks later and then we.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
And I'm going out with him again then.
AJ Holiday 2.0
That's dumb, bitch.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That was the dumbest I've ever been. But you know, I will.
Tam Bam
I will tell you why. No, I'll tell you why.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I'll tell you why. Is because I grew up with, you know, my brothers, my God brothers. They. I used to listen to my brothers roll game on girls all the time. They got shoes, clothes, cars, whatever. And I would. And they would be like, watch this. And they said, don't ever be a chicken head. But who's the chicken head really done witches. Really?
AJ Holiday 2.0
Or guys who. You As a guy who chicken head.
Tam Bam
Shit.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That's what they told me. And so I listened. I listened the whole time. And I work in a male dominated environment, right. My whole life. I'm a surgeon, I'm a doctor. I was in the Navy for 26 years. I was like, yeah, y' all not getting me.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I feel you.
Tam Bam
No, I'm here for that. But that was like, not a dumbest story.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
That's the best thing.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I thought about this all night too. That one time. That one nigga, like, what?
Tam Bam
Yeah, to think hard. Like when. Because when I tell her, she's like, yeah, I've never been played. I don't know what you're talking about. I'm like, come up with.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Well, I do have another one. And I'm still like, salty about it. But, you know, I invested in a friend's company and I looked at all the financials and everything like that. I'm still waiting for my money. So if that's another one, that could be another one. So be very careful about your investments and especially if you're trying to help a friend out and see them grow. And, you know, in this day and age when everybody's like, you know, support black businesses and all that other stuff. Nah, boo, I need to see your financials, your tax reports. I need to see, like, open them books. Open the books. So that would be another DB story. A dvx.
Tam Bam
Were you dating that person?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
No, no. We just have been friends for like over 20 years.
Tam Bam
Yeah, it don't count. I mean, I don't know.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Anytime money involved, somebody owed me some money, I might have been a dumb bitch giving you my money. I might have been.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Yeah, yeah, that was a. That was a dbs. That. That's another big dbs. Now the younger one, that was a young dbs. This older one, I. I probably should have. You know, thought a little bit harder and listened to.
Tam Bam
Well, you're just trying to help, though, so that don't make me.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Well, I don't have them. I'm a Virgo born on September 4.
AJ Holiday 2.0
I'm Virgo rising. And I definitely. That guy played a couple times in life, man. Definitely.
Tam Bam
Okay, I'm about to take the nigga on vacation on Monday, so I might have a dumb bitch story for y' all next week.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
We'll see.
AJ Holiday 2.0
A be in the bathroom the whole time.
Tam Bam
Kelly, I haven't joined Viva Life 5 yet.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Come on through. We'll help you not be a dbs.
Tam Bam
All right, all right, one more time. Tell everybody they where they can find you, where they can follow you on social media. Plug all your things.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Oh, thank you so much. So I'm Dr. Kellyomz and you can find me www.doctor K-E-L-L-Y-O M D.com. if you go there, Instagram doctorkellyomd as well as Facebook, Instagram, Vivalife, SPF me. So just go to the website, click all the little buttons, and you'll find me.
Tam Bam
All right. Thank you so much, Dr. Kelly. This is fun, and I got a lot of information that I needed, so thank you so, so very much.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Absolutely.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
I had fun, too. Thanks for bringing that. You know, the Virgos can be real serious, so thank you for bringing out the laughter in me as well.
Tam Bam
Good, good.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Get to the bag. That's one thing about a Virgo boy, they gonna get that bag.
Tam Bam
Yeah. All right, y'.
AJ Holiday 2.0
All. If you enjoyed this episode, y' all tune in every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app or wherever the fuck you get. Excuse me, where the f you get your podcast app? Your co host, AJ Holiday 2.0 on Instagram's Kick It Tam, y'.
Tam Bam
All. It's official. Tam Bam on Instagram, y'.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All.
Tam Bam
Follow me there, y'.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All. Follow.
Tam Bam
We Talk Back podcast on Instagram, y'.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
All.
Tam Bam
I love y' all so much, and I appreciate y' all for tuning in every week. I can't wait to see you next week. Come back, y'.
AJ Holiday 2.0
All.
Tam Bam
Remember, speak now and never hold that.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Perry.
Tam Bam
And never stop popping that pee. Deucey. Bye.
AJ Holiday 2.0
We Talk Back podcast is a production of iHeartRadio. Visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Thanks for listening and celebrating five years of the Black Effect Podcast network with us. Keep following because the next five years.
AJ Holiday
Are about to be even bigger. What a matchup we got, y' all this is that classic hbcuva non stop back action. The band is rocking and the crowd lit. Chance, echo drum beating. Everybody showing that school pride game like this. Yeah, it calls for an ice cold Coca Cola. Ah, crisp and refreshing. That's a game changer right there. Yeah, that taste always hits the right note. Just like the band at halftime. And just like that, we're back at it. Half passionate fans, school colors everywhere and an ice cold Coca Cola. That's a winning combo no matter the sport, no matter the yard. Everybody knows fan work is thirsty work. So grab a Coca Cola and keep that HBCU pride going.
AJ Holiday 2.0
Amazon five Star Theater presents real customer reviews performed by Eva Longoria. Tonight's review, sports briefs. Oh boy, where do I even start with these performance mesh boxer briefs.
AJ Holiday
These boxer briefs are like a magician's trick.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
You know the one where you go, where did that rabbit come from?
AJ Holiday 2.0
So if you're looking for underwear that.
AJ Holiday
Not only performs well, but also gives.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Your package the attention it deserves, then look no further. 5 stars Nicola Delicious Shop the perfect gift this holiday season on Amazon.
Sophie Cunningham
This is Sophie Cunningham from Show Me Something. Do you know the symptoms of moderate to severe obstructive sleep apnea, or osa, in adults with obesity? They may be happening to you without you knowing. If anyone has ever said you snored loudly, or if you spend your days fighting off excessive tiredness, irritability and concentration issues, it may be due to osa. OSA is a serious condition where your airway partially or completely collapses during sleep, which may cause breathing interruptions and oxygen deprivation. Learn more at. Don't sleep on OSA.com this information is provided by Lily, a medicine company.
Tam Bam
You know what a girl's best friend is?
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Not diamonds. Her lawyers.
AJ Holiday
From executive producer Ryan Murphy comes a fiery new legal drama.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
It's our own boutique women representing women.
AJ Holiday
You can't afford to miss.
Dr. Kelly Elmore
Make it rain. Showtime, ladies. Stand up straight and breeze into that room like a storm no one saw coming.
AJ Holiday
Hulu Original Series All's Fair Now Streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply. Running a business is hard enough. Don't make it harder with a dozen apps that don't talk to each other. One for sales, another for inventory. A separate one for accounting. That's software overload. Odoo is the all in one platform that replaces them all. CRM, accounting, inventory, E Commerce, hr. Fully integrated, easy to use, and built to grow. With your business, thousands have already made the switch. Why not you try Odoo for free@odoo.com. that's odoo.com.
Tam Bam
This is an iHeart podcast. Guaranteed Human.
Date: December 13, 2025
Hosts: Tam Bam & AJ Holiday 2.0
Guest: Dr. Kelly Elmore (OBGYN, founder of KOE Medical Consulting)
This episode centers on the realities of perimenopause and menopause, featuring Dr. Kelly Elmore—a board-certified OBGYN and retired Navy captain. Hosts Tam Bam and AJ Holiday bring humor and honesty, sharing their own experiences and questions about women’s health. Dr. Elmore breaks down myths, symptoms, lifestyle adjustments, and medical options, framing the "change" as a powerful, inevitable, and manageable life phase for women. The conversation is candid, relatable, and packed with practical advice.
Dr. Kelly Elmore:
We Talk Back podcast:
“Do not be afraid of the change. It can be the best time of your life as well, period.” — Dr. Kelly Elmore (81:47)
Summary by The Breakfast Club: We Talk Back – “Peri Who? feat. Dr. Kelly Elmore”
For further questions or community, connect with the hosts and Dr. Kelly via social media or the provided web links.