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Andrew Schultz
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Charlamagne Tha God
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Andrew Schultz
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Charlamagne Tha God
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Andrew Schultz
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Charlamagne Tha God
Yep. Charlamagne. Tha God Andrew Scholly are the Brilliant Idiot podcast back for another week of brilliant idiotness? Heather Kyle Walker 20:26 Man. How do you feel? How do you feel?
Andrew Schultz
I need a loan, man. Alex, I need a loan.
Charlamagne Tha God
MTF is booming, baby. I heard.
Andrew Schultz
I heard about that deal. Charlamagne. I heard about a $200 million deal.
Charlamagne Tha God
The gang is all here. Alex is here. Here. Chris is here. Taylor.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, he's deflecting.
Charlamagne Tha God
Everybody's here.
Andrew Schultz
He need to deflect some of them commas over here.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's real. But listen, there is congratulations to go around. Okay, first of all, Taylor got engaged. Congratulations Taylor Gang. For anybody who thought it never would happen. For anybody who doubted. For anybody who doubted that somebody would ever take her out. Say your name. For anybody who ever thought that nobody would buy that count cause they was getting all that milk for free. Taylor Gang. Taylor Gang is engaged. Shout out to P man for making her a wholesome woman. It's all because of me.
Andrew Schultz
Oh really?
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. I mean, you Put the pressure on to do this. Well, first of all, I introduced her and Pete. No, you did not. That's number one. And then also, you know. Right. Like, I think maybe the episode before the last episode of the year, you know, I was putting pressure on Pete to, you know, propose to Taylor. Remember when I was shaming her? You know, not shaming her, but just thinking that it would never happen.
Andrew Schultz
Right.
Charlamagne Tha God
And he did it.
Andrew Schultz
No.
Charlamagne Tha God
My God. My God. Yeah, Pete. Yeah, Pete. How you feel, Taylor, you are ridiculous. How you feel, Mother? Taylor was ridiculous. Beyonce. Taylor. I can't even deal. I can't. The way she shames all the women.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, really?
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, it's just. And it's subtle flexes. Subtle. It's subtle flexes. She just come in smiling like an African. Like, just smiling for no reason. Okay. Hey. Oh, it's disgusting. So we're happy for you.
Andrew Schultz
Thank you. Bravo.
Charlamagne Tha God
Taylor Hezekiah Walker. And then there were four. And then there were Schultz. Party of four, man. Congratulations. Thank you. Congratulations.
Andrew Schultz
Thank you. Thank you very much.
Charlamagne Tha God
Congratulations. It's the boy, right?
Andrew Schultz
Boy.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. Now you and Chris are the only ones that don't have boys. Damn. Y' all pick. Y' all picked it though, right? It was. No. Really?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, we did ivf. We did IVF the same time. But. But yeah.
Andrew Schultz
We've never picked. We've never.
Charlamagne Tha God
Man.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
What's his name? Lincoln. Lincoln.
Andrew Schultz
Lincoln Lawrence Schultz.
Charlamagne Tha God
Salute to Lincoln Lawrence Schultz. Man, he needs a special. You can't have one sibling with a special. The life part two. You gotta get Lincoln a special. Lincoln needs a special man. We're gonna see.
Andrew Schultz
We're gonna see.
Charlamagne Tha God
Come on, man. Imagine the arguments when they get older. I got a special. Daddy loves me more. Daddy loves me more. I'm actually special. You're not. You got to create special link.
Andrew Schultz
I'm so sorry. I don't think it's happening.
Charlamagne Tha God
How does it feel, though, dude? It's.
Andrew Schultz
I mean, it's awesome. You know, Nobody gives a fuck about your second kid.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's really true.
Andrew Schultz
Nah, nah. Nobody cares about the second. I don't even know if Alex congratulated me just yet. I think.
Charlamagne Tha God
Wait, why did he?
Andrew Schultz
I think he commented in the group chat. Maybe. I think he, like, hearted a picture.
Charlamagne Tha God
Or something like that.
Andrew Schultz
Nobody as excited as your. Nobody. Did not happen. But I'm not bitter about it. But no, nobody cares about your second kid. But it is amazing. It is incredible. And it's fudgeing terrifying every single time.
Charlamagne Tha God
You know what? It is? You know, so it's interesting you say that because probably with the first one, people doubted it could ever happen.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, people were very excited given what they knew about the journey.
Charlamagne Tha God
Exactly.
Andrew Schultz
Like how stressed I was, how stressed my wife was like. So I think that there was like a sigh of relief, not just for us, but like all of our friends and then.
Charlamagne Tha God
But you wore it well, though. You wore the first one very well. Like, I mean, it didn't. See, you didn't seem stressed about, oh, I couldn't breathe. Yeah, but you didn't do it publicly is what I'm saying.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, yeah. I mean it would happen in the episodes. I would do the. I would like yawn a lot and people thought I was tired, but I was just drained. No, I. I literally couldn't breathe. So your body gets. Has this like weird reaction where in order to get enough oxygen, like it's called a anxiety induced asphyxiation or something.
Charlamagne Tha God
Like that you could be cool with because of the anxiety of just.
Andrew Schultz
I guess I was stressed.
Charlamagne Tha God
Okay, gotcha.
Andrew Schultz
It was just like this weird shit anyway. But number two is sick. And I'm very grateful this time too. No, actually, yeah. Like, and then when you go in, then you think it's gonna be like an easy C section birth and it's just terrifying once again.
Charlamagne Tha God
Right.
Andrew Schultz
It's just.
Charlamagne Tha God
But you have a son now, so why would no one care what pressure he has?
Andrew Schultz
No, I'm teasing. People are very sweet and people reached out and they said amazing things and.
Charlamagne Tha God
It was awes pressure he has. He got to be funny, you know what I'm saying? Like, for real, bro. It's a lot of pressure though.
Andrew Schultz
Does he?
Charlamagne Tha God
Yes.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, I guess.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, I'll make him funny. Regardless of what. You don't got to be a comedian. It's funny. Regardless of what he does. He got to be funny.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, yeah, I guess that's true. But it is. It's funny having a boy. Like, I'm immediately far more inappropriate around him than I am my daughter. Like, I'm very protective around my daughter. I don't make any like, inappropriate jokes or if I do, it's like very subtle. But with him immediately jokes come.
Charlamagne Tha God
You know what's going to happen. She's going to be the inappropriate one. Who? She's going to be the one. She's absolutely making all the 100%. The son's going to be woke.
Andrew Schultz
100%. No, 100% because that's how he's going to rebel. And she's going to rebel against 100%. That's all they do.
Charlamagne Tha God
He's going to be the woke one, man. Congratulations, though. More life. Life is beautiful, ain't it?
Andrew Schultz
Sick, dude.
Charlamagne Tha God
Life is beautiful.
Andrew Schultz
It is. It is awesome. It was awesome.
Charlamagne Tha God
What'd you do for the holidays? Anything fun?
Andrew Schultz
I just had a baby. Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Just hung out. Yeah. Yeah. You couldn't even move.
Andrew Schultz
Baby came out January 3rd, man. So we were all, like, you know, cooped up until then. So. So now my wife is.
Charlamagne Tha God
Was that the due date?
Andrew Schultz
January 3rd is when you, like, schedule it if you're gonna do a C section because everything goes well. And then, yes, we went in.
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, Lincoln got too much pressure. And he got a birthday right after the holiday. I know. Like, nobody's gonna care about his birthday. It's like you'll be talking like it was just Chris twice. You know what I'm saying?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. People already broke, exhausted.
Charlamagne Tha God
You see what I'm saying? Oh, my God.
Andrew Schultz
Gonna build up. He's gonna be a tough kid.
Charlamagne Tha God
You know, I was in Cape Town.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, yeah, you went to white Africa. How is white Africa? Like, why did you decide to go to white Africa?
Charlamagne Tha God
I just. People.
Andrew Schultz
You got a whole lot of. Not white people. You went to the white.
Charlamagne Tha God
No, when I went to Johannesburg, everybody.
Andrew Schultz
$200 million from, you know, big deal. All of a sudden you want to hang out with white people.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what you're talking about. But when I get it, when I'm.
Andrew Schultz
Not going to Ghana with $200 million.
Charlamagne Tha God
I love Ghana. Ghana was great.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, that was before the 200 million. But when I went to Joe 200 million, you.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what I'm talking about. When I went to Johannesburg, everybody was like, yo, you gotta go to Cape Town. And then when I went to Cape Town and Cape Town, it's rich. It's rich to be in Joe Burke. But it's not as white as people say it is.
Andrew Schultz
But it's whiter than Africa.
Charlamagne Tha God
I mean, it's just. You know what it is? Mad coloreds, that's what they call them. Anybody that's not white is the colored. So it's a lot of coloreds.
Andrew Schultz
Got it.
Charlamagne Tha God
But then it was white people, too. But, you know, it was interesting. White people was walking up to me saying, you tell them there's no genocide happening here to us. And by the way, I had forgot what the hell. What the hell they were.
Andrew Schultz
Kill the boa. Kill the boa. That's what they were. That's what the leader was saying. Right?
Charlamagne Tha God
I have no Idea.
Andrew Schultz
I was like, the farmer.
Charlamagne Tha God
It took me two seconds. It took me like 30 seconds to realize, what the fuck?
Andrew Schultz
White people getting out of Africa, man. They're getting out of South Africa. Nah, they were fleeing, bro.
Charlamagne Tha God
They were there. No, they weren't, though. That's what they were trying to tell me to say, though. They were saying to me, you tell them it's no genocide happening here. It's beautiful. By the way. Cape Town looks like Malibu. Like, literally, like, there's a whole stretch where you can drive to go see the penguins that look like the Pacific Coast Highway. Yeah, they got the city dispensaries in Africa, bro. Mike Tyson has a dispensary in Africa. You know, the Tyson bites edibles and all of that shit like that. Like, he has a whole dispensary in Cape Town. It's beautiful. You go in there, get a fucking THC slussy, sit down in the fucking lounge, watch all the old fights. They show all his old fights on video. And then they start showing all the old heavyweight fights. People in there smoking, having a good time. I'm like, yo, Tyson, don't even have this in America. You got one in Cape Town and one in Amsterdam. Yeah, listen, strip clubs in Cape Town. Food is amazing. Like, I thoroughly enjoyed myself when I was there.
Andrew Schultz
But tell us about that deal, though. What deal? Tell us about that deal, though.
Charlamagne Tha God
Cause we were all subscribing to your YouTube channel.
Andrew Schultz
I was subscribing to your YouTube channel.
Charlamagne Tha God
I still want them to subscribe to my YouTube channel.
Andrew Schultz
No, I was subscribing because I wanted to support you. And then literally the next day, news breaks of like, NBA player contract.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't.
Andrew Schultz
No, what, you got a max contract?
Charlamagne Tha God
Talking about? Listen, I did. I did resign with iHeart. I did.
Andrew Schultz
You did resign with iHeart.
Charlamagne Tha God
Absolutely.
Andrew Schultz
And there's a number that's out there that is just preposterous.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know nothing about that. Okay, well, who said the number?
Andrew Schultz
I honestly thought you rejected the deal and went back to Africa. That's. I thought. Literally. I thought you did some Chappelle shit. I thought you were like, I can't handle it anymore.
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm going back to Africa. Life is not about numbers. I hear you about. Life is about. Life is about opportunity.
Andrew Schultz
What is life about?
Charlamagne Tha God
Life is about opportunity. It's about if. If what? Build only benefits you. It's not big enough. Okay, that's what life is about. Okay. We are, you know, building the Black Effect podcast network. We've been around for five Years. We are, you know, building things like SBH Productions. We are building things like Black Privilege Publishing. We just building, man. You know what I'm saying? We're just building. Just building. Just building. I will say, though, I've watched two weeks of very bad takes about that situation you're talking about.
Andrew Schultz
What situation?
Charlamagne Tha God
You know that situation you keep.
Andrew Schultz
I don't know what you're referring to.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, you know, this situation y' all keep mentioning.
Andrew Schultz
You fleeing to Africa.
Charlamagne Tha God
No, man, the thing.
Andrew Schultz
Why do people say you went to Africa? For another reason.
Charlamagne Tha God
Tell me, isn't that what Chappelle did? Chappelle bounced. Well, he didn't take it.
Andrew Schultz
He bounced for way less.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, he didn't take it.
Andrew Schultz
He didn't get 200.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what you're talking about. Inflation. I don't know what you're talking. 200. But I'm saying.
Andrew Schultz
No, but 200, you would have figured a way out.
Charlamagne Tha God
I thought that's what you were supposed to do, though, Liz.
Andrew Schultz
I thought you were. I thought you were going to.
Charlamagne Tha God
I thought you go to Africa. Thought you were building Wells, bro.
Andrew Schultz
That's what I thought. I thought you got the 200. You're like, I need to.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what you're talking about.
Andrew Schultz
That's why I thought you went back.
Charlamagne Tha God
I did say I did. I really did. See two weeks of just bad takes, man. People just talking about things. They have no knowledge.
Andrew Schultz
What were they saying?
Charlamagne Tha God
It's ridiculous stuff. I will say this.
Andrew Schultz
This.
Charlamagne Tha God
This is going to upset some people.
Andrew Schultz
Okay. Okay.
Charlamagne Tha God
Just need people to know. The Breakfast Club Netflix situation.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Is a whole other situation than me resigning.
Andrew Schultz
What I hear that's not included in the iheart deal.
Charlamagne Tha God
Why would it be? Like, I don't even know why people even conflated those two things. That makes no sense. But that didn't make that. When y' all hear that. That ain't that. I'm like, nobody stopped to say, this makes no sense.
Andrew Schultz
You were rubbing salt.
Charlamagne Tha God
The Breakfast Club Netflix deal was announced on like, what, a Monday or Tuesday, and it was a total different announcement on Friday. Salute to Forbes. Salute to my guy, Jabari. Jabari did a fantastic write up, you know, just about, you know, all of the different things that I'm building. And it was interesting for him to, you know, write that the angle he took as me as, like, this, you know, superhero in the media space. Because I also got to salute Variety because Variety did that at the top of the year, Right? Variety did. I was on the COVID of variety. And it said charlamagne Incorporated. And they highlighted, you know, all of the various business ventures that I have going on. And then Jabari just did it at the end of the year. So I just, you know, I appreciate that. That was dope. You know what I'm saying?
Andrew Schultz
That is cool. That is cool.
Charlamagne Tha God
But I don't know why people would think that the two deals are together. Like, that makes no sense. Basically saying, stop lowballing him is what he's saying. Oh, wow. That's what he said. I didn't say. I did not say that. All I simply said was the Breakfast Club and Netflix deal is a completely different situation than me re signing with iheart. Damn. Like, I don't know what the. I don't. What am I. Listen, man. God's good. I don't know what to tell you.
Andrew Schultz
Yes.
Charlamagne Tha God
We getting a raise, guys. Getting raised.
Andrew Schultz
Shit. I want a raise. Well, no.
Charlamagne Tha God
Well, no, no, no. Brilliant Idiots is separate from all of them. Like idiots, though. Am I lying? Brilliant Idiots is a separate venture from all of those things. Am I. I'm not making this up. Am I making this up? Andrew. Andrew. So am I, Chris. Am I making this up? Brian Edeas is a separate. It's always, Charlotte, give me a loan. Brian A. Has always been a separate entity. It always has been.
Andrew Schultz
That's why he's not lying.
Charlamagne Tha God
It's just such a.
Andrew Schultz
The man's not lying.
Charlamagne Tha God
We've always been a separate entity. Breeds his loudspeaker. And we've been over here doing what we do for the last 13 years. It has nothing to do with any of those other things.
Andrew Schultz
I'm sinking tired of de. How can white people make a $200 million deal?
Charlamagne Tha God
Bro? Y' all originated it.
Andrew Schultz
I'm just joking.
Charlamagne Tha God
I've learned from y'. All. But I don't know about that number you're talking about. You know what I'm saying? But that has been the bar. The Bill Simmons of the world. You know, the Joe Rogans of the world. Alex Cooper, Caller Daddy.
Andrew Schultz
I'm very proud of you.
Charlamagne Tha God
They originated that.
Andrew Schultz
Proud of what?
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm happy to reach. Are we all gonna be able to go on vacation together then? My mother told me, yeah. Tell me to just be happy you're making a living. And that's how I've always lived my life. Just be happy that I'm making a living. But you act. What, you mean vacation together? We've been doing that for the last decade. You just choose not to come? No. You never invited Me. That's not true. That's completely true, by the way. I don't invite nobody. Everybody invites theyself. And I'm not one of those people. I'm not gonna be like, hey, I'm about to come. Why couldn't you do that? Because my mom taught me not to do that. Oh. That's what everybody else does. Literally. People hear me say. People hear me mention Anguilla. They like styles.
Andrew Schultz
Don't get fed.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's what I'm saying.
Andrew Schultz
Like, you think he would have got a $275 million deal?
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know. If asked for it. I don't know what he thought about that.
Andrew Schultz
You think that he would have gotten paid $350 million if he didn't ask for that contract? This guy would have got a $400 million Netflix contract.
Charlamagne Tha God
God is good, man. Shout out to Netflix.
Andrew Schultz
Which guy you believe in, bro?
Charlamagne Tha God
Jehovah? Well, he don't believe in President, Jehovah, Jehovah, Allah. I just believe in God. I will say this, though. Shout out to Netflix. We start on Netflix January 26th. Breakfast Club starts on Netflix January 26th. Also, that's a lot of bad information that's going around. People are just having these conversations online, talking about, we're not going to be on YouTube anymore. We're not going to be on social media. This is what I want y' all to do in 2026. Please shut the fuck up. Ooh. Okay, just. How about start asking more questions as opposed to just getting on your platforms and saying things that you have no knowledge of, just for engagement, because all you're doing is spreading a whole bunch of bad information. And I thought about coming in here and, like, you know, having a conversation about it, but for what?
Andrew Schultz
Have a conversation about what?
Charlamagne Tha God
Just explain to people the stupid stuff that they be saying and they're wrong. But it's like, why does it matter? Let me tell you something now, if you ask, like Schultz asked me, because Schultz, my guy. So ask me questions, like, we talk behind the scenes. You ask me about the certain deals, and I tell you because you my.
Andrew Schultz
Guy, you said it was 200 million.
Charlamagne Tha God
I didn't say that. I never said that.
Andrew Schultz
That's what you said behind the scenes.
Charlamagne Tha God
I never said anything.
Andrew Schultz
That's what you said behind the scenes.
Charlamagne Tha God
I never said. But, I mean, listen, how much? How much is much? That don't even mean any. Like, what do we. He's not. People just throwing. It's just numbers. Like, it's not about that, man. It's about being able to provide opportunity for everyone. That's what I like. That's what I'm here for. I like to throw more assists than score points.
Andrew Schultz
I'm surprised nobody kidnapped you in Africa, man. Africa's really man. I gotta be honest.
Charlamagne Tha God
People are balling in Africa.
Andrew Schultz
I'm not saying they're not balling, but they could get kidnapped too.
Charlamagne Tha God
No, people are balling everybody in Africa. Look like that. Drew Ski megapastiskit.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, really?
Charlamagne Tha God
Like everybody driving something big. Oh my God. Driving luxury cars like Africa is amazing. Cape Town is amazing. And. And you're already balling in Africa because like, the dollar compared to the ran is like.
Andrew Schultz
And how many dollars do you have?
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what you're talking about.
Andrew Schultz
Hey, Taylor, how much you think he got?
Charlamagne Tha God
Was he walk simple man different life?
Andrew Schultz
Was he walking different in iHeart or what?
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm a simple man. I look simple life different.
Andrew Schultz
Was he walking through those halls differently? What was he walking through those halls like? That's what I. Are people being nicer to him now? People a little nicer, right?
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm a nice person. So I get back what I put out.
Andrew Schultz
That's a good point. I've always supported you.
Charlamagne Tha God
I've always thought you're a great guy, bro.
Andrew Schultz
My guy, fucking great guy.
Charlamagne Tha God
People don't want Andrew to be my guy. Like every time I do interviews and they be asking me questions about it, I'm like, what the fuck, yo?
Andrew Schultz
Oh no.
Charlamagne Tha God
Listen, man, there's a. I'm just a.
Andrew Schultz
Father of two, man. I'm just a father too. Trying to make it out here.
Charlamagne Tha God
It is crazy though. It's like we've been doing branded this for the last 13 years and now all of a sudden they just trying to flip narratives. What are they trying to do? I did the Poor Minds podcast and they asked me how do I feel? And I guess you make certain comments that are racially insensitive. And I was like, yo, it's none of my business. You know why? Cause I wasn't even just thinking black in that moment. How do you continue yalls relationship but still trying to educate him but not cross the line? How do you maneuver that? Not my business.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
You know, and the reason I say it's not my business is because it's the same when I got shit going on. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, people like to come to me about things Andrew said and Andrew's a grown ass man with his own opinions. Right? Like, I don't have nothing to do with that. Like, we get on. Brilliant. Idiot. We have our discussions. We have our debates. We've been doing that for 13 years. You keep it moving. Plus, man, this politics thing is fleeting. Yeah, right. Like, you know, 2016, we went through that. You know, that's when they was calling them alt, right, Andy. Yeah. 2020 came. Biden was in office 2024. He. He chose to support Trump. Listen, everybody got the right to be wrong. You know what I mean? Because at the end of the day, when you make a decision, right, that person that you voted for, if that person doesn't follow through, you still voted for that person. So if you're wrong and he takes the country to shit, then you gotta eat that. To me, that's just, like, that stuff is fleeting. You know, Sometimes I be feeling like. I don't know if I could. It'd be hard. Like, if I. Like, if I felt like Draya said something publicly crazy now in the public, we ain't gonna. I'm not gonna get into her about it, but I feel like we would have to have a conversation behind closed doors. Yeah, me and shows definitely have a lot of conversations. Like I said, some of them we bring to the podcast, some of them we don't. But like you said, Dre are your people. Yeah, right. And can't nobody tell you about Draya, right? Just, like, can't nobody tell Draya about Lex. Cause we know each other. Y' all know each other. It's like when I see people say stuff on social media, you know, I be in on interviews and people bring up shows, I'm like, y' all don't know him. Like, y' all know a perception of him or y' all know a moment that y' all saw. I know the man for 13 years. I know his pops. I know his. His mom. Yeah. His brother. Like, I know his family. He knows my family. He was at my wedding. Like, I was at his wedding. Like, it's just like, this is somebody I actually know. So you can't tell me about somebody I know?
Andrew Schultz
What was the comment?
Charlamagne Tha God
You offended 20,000 different races, you know? You know. You know who. Pretty good. You know who. Andrew. You are very consistent. You know who Andrew set off first that I thought was hilarious, but nobody ever talks about it. Who, the Asians?
Andrew Schultz
No, they love me.
Charlamagne Tha God
No, no, no, no. But when you did the show Saves America special, there was something you said on there.
Andrew Schultz
I called it the Kung Flu. That's a bar, bro.
Charlamagne Tha God
I just remember the Asians were so upset.
Andrew Schultz
They were upset Cause in the Shultz America, I said it started in China.
Charlamagne Tha God
It did, though.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
I've been proven.
Andrew Schultz
I got canceled, or where that stupid term is for singing start in China. And nobody apologized for me for canceling me for being right.
Charlamagne Tha God
You don't apologize.
Andrew Schultz
Nobody apologize.
Charlamagne Tha God
I do wish, though, that on the poor mind I would have. I did. I liked my answer, but there was something I wanted to.
Andrew Schultz
I wasn't able to do a show in one of these venues. In one of these venues in Wuhan. No, no, no, no. In Canada. They were like, he said insensitive shit. This is post Covid. It was like he said insensitive shit to Asians during COVID And the insensitive shit was, it started in China and. But they're not looking at the fact that it was real. Like, isn't that kind of funny that, like, the only thing that sticks is you said something insensitive even though it ended up being accurate.
Charlamagne Tha God
Nobody cares. But, you know, salute to. Salute to head crack. I saw head crack. Him and Claudia Jordan, they got a show and he gave a take. And what he said. What he said is what I wish I would have added to it because I got to lead with that.
Andrew Schultz
What's that?
Charlamagne Tha God
At the end of the day and at the beginning of the day, actually, you're a comedian.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
And comedy is weird. Like, comedy is such a weird thing because things that people say on stage isn't always truly how they feel in the real world. You know, you have to be a. Like an all caps version of yourself saying the outrageous things that's gonna make people's bell ring. And one thing I've noticed about Andrew Schultz's comedy is like, everybody's eligible for the smoke. Like, he gives it to everybody. A lot of comedians give it to everybody. And people sometimes only get mad when they're offended because now the gun is turned on you. Meanwhile, you was just laughing at that crippled people joke a little while ago. And. And. And now you mad because they want to roll up on you. Like, at the end of the day, I feel like comedy should be a. A safe house where you can go in there and say the thing and not be canceled because the thing you said, unless you're truly a racist, comedians should be allowed to say. And I'm not even gonna say allowed. Loud's not the right word. I'll say this. Comedians say offensive stuff. Comedians say things that are insensitive. That's what comedians do. There's not a great. Most great comedians are going to offend Somebody. We just saw Dave Chappelle special. I don't know if y' all watched it. I enjoyed it. There was people that were offended by Dave Chappelle's special. I have never seen a great. Jesus Christ. Take that down. I've never seen. I've never seen a. What is that? That is crazy. That is crazy Dave Chappelle special. Pull up the Forbes cover. That's, you know, that's better. Like, you know what I mean? That's not even about numbers. That's just about.
Andrew Schultz
It's about greatness, success, and providing.
Charlamagne Tha God
Why don't you pull up the Forbes cover, Alex, if you're gonna put anything back, this is nice. Nah, put up the Forbes cover. Put up the Forbes cover. But. But comedians say insensitive things. Comedians say things that are offensive. That's what comedians do. You don't have to think it's funny. You don't. You can even criticize it.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
You know what I mean? You can do all of that. But moral of the story is I'm not answering for Andrew. And also brilliant Ennis. We've been doing this podcast for 13 years, and this is why I say we do it for the fellow brilliant idiots. The people who actually listen to this show. And they listen to this show and they've heard us debate.
Andrew Schultz
Yes.
Charlamagne Tha God
They've heard us have conversations. They've heard us agree, they've heard us disagree. They've seen the gamut in the last 13 years. You can't worry about the people who just popped up in the last couple of years, bro. And they running with some narratives.
Andrew Schultz
I think you said a good point, which is, like, people are allowed to be offended by jokes.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yes.
Andrew Schultz
I don't think it's fair for comedians to go, you're not allowed to be offended. People get to react however they want to react to stuff.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yes.
Andrew Schultz
The hope is that you would see comedians trying to make you laugh and doing something a little naughty and maybe something a little insensitive. Kind of the way that we act with our friends. I don't think anybody's, like, the most appropriate when they're just hanging with their friends. So that's the hope.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. You know, it's so funny. When we did, like, even when we did the New York Times thing before the holiday break, you know, I saw people saying, you know, why would they have a. You know, why would they. No, they said. They said, Charlemagne and Schultz are here, and they're not taking anything serious. Especially Schultz. He's a comedian. That's why we're here, but the honest conversation. We're also the only ones coming through the vehicle of jokes.
Andrew Schultz
Well, yeah, but also I think we're there because we're the only ones that kind of understood what was happening in the landscape of media.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's why we were there.
Andrew Schultz
And the conversation was about new media. So you need some new media to be there to kind of explain what's going on to legacy media.
Charlamagne Tha God
Duh. And what is legacy media trying to do? No, dis.
Andrew Schultz
Don't invite me anywhere if you want me to be serious.
Charlamagne Tha God
CNN got a show with Roy Wood, Jun Amber Ruffin, and it's another comedian on there as well. My point is they even understand that news is probably best digestible through comedy. Not saying that that should be always the news.
Andrew Schultz
That is to get your news, but.
Charlamagne Tha God
That is a lens.
Andrew Schultz
But that is unfortunate that everything has to be entertainment. You do wish that there was a thirst for news. The problem is that news is boring. So people find more entertaining ways to share with people.
Charlamagne Tha God
And then the greatest political pundit of the last 20 years is Jon Stewart. Yes, yes, he is a person, but.
Andrew Schultz
He'S not doing news.
Charlamagne Tha God
He is, though.
Andrew Schultz
He is, but what I would say is that he is. I would say it's not news. I would say he does a comedy show and he happens to talk about politics.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, it's comedy, but the content of it is politics. It's news is what's going on.
Andrew Schultz
But what's happening right now is that information is boring. So everything has become infotainment. And when everything becomes infotainment, you gravitate towards the most entertaining thing.
Charlamagne Tha God
And that's not our fault.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, well, I think a lot of times we get blamed for it. You know what I mean?
Charlamagne Tha God
Why? It's not our fault. All we do is come on this show, give our takes about the world, and news outlets take them and post them.
Andrew Schultz
I think when people are frustrated with what's happening, they have to find somebody to blame for it or some idea to blame for it or trying to blame for it. I think that's a natural human thing. I think I'm guilty of it. I think you're guilty of it. I think we're all fucking guilty of it. So I'm not putting ourselves on a fucking pedestal. I just think that's like the natural human reaction. So sometimes they might go, wow, Charlemagne or Schultz, you guys are so entertaining and you're entertaining these political ideas, but you're putting bad stuff out there in the world. And then we're just going, hey, we just do an entertainment show. We're not doing a news show or political show.
Charlamagne Tha God
And I don't have an agenda. How about that? Maybe that's refreshing to people. Maybe it's refreshing to hear somebody who don't have an agenda, who's just sitting down talking to people on both sides of the aisle, just asking questions. Because I have an intellectual curiosity about what's going on.
Andrew Schultz
But that's why it's nice. But you have to understand there are certain people that look at. Look through the life through the lens of if you don't have an agenda, you are being insensitive to their existence.
Charlamagne Tha God
Existence.
Andrew Schultz
Like, there are certain people that go, there's only one agenda. And is the agenda that allows me to, like, live freely in America. And if you don't support that, someone's going to take away my rights. Someone's gonna. And I, like, I have empathy for them, too. I understand where they're coming from. Like, I might disagree on that, that their rights would be stripped away, but it's not like it hasn't happened. There hasn't been circumstances that happen. So, like, yeah, that's why I go, you're allowed to be offended. I just wish that, like, we had a label on the top. Like, we literally put idiot in the title and it still doesn't work. But I wish that there was just, like, a fucking banner across everything that we did that was like, guys, this is only entertainment.
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm not gonna say it's only entertainment, though. I think brutally, I think what you said about Jon Stewart is true. I think we might be just entertaining, regardless of what it is we choose to discuss.
Andrew Schultz
I think that's true. But, like, yeah, I think that's true. I don't want to, like, undercut ourselves, but if I had to, if I had to lean in one direction, I would lean in the direction of entertainment.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Andrew Schultz
Than I would about. Than I would straight information or politics.
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, 100%.
Andrew Schultz
I think politics crosses over to our field, which is really just culture.
Charlamagne Tha God
Politics is pop culture because, well, you know what? I started to say politics is pop culture because of the last couple of presidents, but the reality is I can't remember a time when it hadn't been pop culture. I'm old enough to remember when Bill Clinton was blowing the goddamn sack and.
Andrew Schultz
That was pop culture.
Charlamagne Tha God
Ronald Reagan was an actor who came from motherfucking Hollywood. George W. Bush was a caricature before Donald Trump, the most incompetent president who everybody used to make jokes about was George W. Bush. And then Obama came and was just the coolest guy around, who was actually a really good politician. And he became pop culture. It's not my fault. Jeezy made a hot record. My president is black, my Lambo's blue, and I'll be goddamn damn if my rims ain't too. What you put. Not supposed to ride to some shit like that. You know what I'm saying?
Andrew Schultz
So I think.
Charlamagne Tha God
But I.
Andrew Schultz
Again, like, if you're frustrated with what's happening right now, you have every right to, you know, express that frustration. And you're going to point in the direction of the different things that you think have, like, aided and abetted it. So for you, for example, if you're asking tough questions to a Democratic candidate and you're making them kind of like, yeah. Look like they're not prepared, some people will blame you instead of blaming that candidate for not being prepared, you know, and I.
Charlamagne Tha God
Which is ridiculous. Well, it's actually ridiculous.
Andrew Schultz
People are ridiculous. You know what I mean? It is. Like, it's one thing to complain or cry about people. I'm not saying you complain or crying, but, like, people are who they are. That's what I've tried to accept. It's like, people are who they are.
Charlamagne Tha God
People are the people. I've accepted it. I truly am okay with everybody's opinion. Yeah, everybody. Like, I want my guy, Cadillac Jack, said it a long time ago to rule it in. Three, people gonna like it. People not gonna like it. Four, people gonna be on the fence about it. Do your thing. Yeah, do your thing. I like. I like. I like it all. I actually am entertained by it. I'll go on YouTube and just go down a rabbit hole of bad opinions. But you know the difference between me and a lot of other people?
Andrew Schultz
What's that?
Charlamagne Tha God
None of those opinions can affect me. None of those opinions can sway me. Because what I hear and I'm really. I'm like, that's just wrong. That's just bad information. Like, that's just not accurate. And I just keep it moving. So to that point, I'm just entertained. Remember on that scene in Training Day when Denzel's character is in the store and he's trying to read his paper and Hoyt's trying to talk to him, and he looks up and he goes, you see this? This is the newspaper. It's 90% bullshit. But it's entertaining. That's why I read it. So since you won't let me read it now you entertain me with your bullshit. That's what it is. So when I want to be entertained by some bullshit, I know exactly where to go at on YouTube, This episode is brought to you by Prize Picks. Whether you're starting a new routine or making Player Picks for the first time, trying something new can be hard. But in life and on Prize Picks, it always feels good to be right. With high pressure playoff matchups every weekend and elite hoops action almost every night, the action never stops and Prize Picks lets you take control. Okay, man, salute to Prize Picks. Man, people love Prize Picks. You hear me? I know some people that actually win money on Prize Picks and they be happy about it. They'll be like, yo, I just won $100 on prize picks. I bet $10 on this, $20 on that. Hey, whatever you want to do, Prize Picks has something for you. Okay? And on Prize Picks, how you play is up to you. If you want flexibility, choose Flex Play, where you can get paid even if one of your picks misses. And if you want the biggest payouts, go for the power play. No matter your play, prizepix is a great way to put your takes to the test. Prizepix now has early payouts if your player gets off to a hard start, you now have the option to cash out those winnings before the game even finishes. Prizepix puts their users first, so all withdrawals are fast and secure. Prizepix accepts most major payment methods, making deposits into your account quick and easy this sports season. Download the Prize Picks app today and use code Idiots to get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup. That's cold. Idiots to get $50 in Lineups after you play your first $5 Lineup. Prize picks is good to be right. Also, man Salute to ZipRecruiter. Okay, if you're hiring for your company, this is a busy time of year for you because You've got new 2026 goals, which means finding the right people to accomplish them. Unfortunately, you also have new hiring challenges for 2026, like filing specialized role qualified candidates from a huge pool of applicants. Thankfully, there's a place you can go that can help you conquer these challenges and achieve your hiring goals. ZipRecruiter and right now you can try it for free@ziprecruiter.com Idiots ZipRecruiter's matching technology works fast to find top talent, so you don't waste time or money. You can find out right away how many job seekers in your area are qualified for Your role with ZipRecruiter's advanced resume database you can instantly unlock top candidates contact info. Let ZipRecruiter help you find the best people for all of your roles. 4 out of 5 employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate within the first day. See it for yourself. Just go to this exclusive web address right now to try ZipRecruiter for free at ZipRecruiter.comidiots. again, that's ZipRecruiter.comidots. zipRecruiter the smartest way to hire. Let's get back to the show.
Andrew Schultz
I think one of the good because I look at all the criticisms and like I try to take it in, I try to be objective about it and like one thing that I heard that I thought was interesting was like, should you be able to do not be able to. This is America. We're free. We can do whatever we want. But like should there be entertaining interviews with people that are close to the levers of power? Right. So it's like the style of interview that I think we've always done, at least on flagrant or even probably in is entertainment based. Right. Like we bring you on and we want to have fun with you, like see who you are, et cetera. Now the question is if you have somebody, and I thought this was the best criticism is like if you have somebody that is that close to the levers of power, you have these politicians that can actually like make certain changes, do they deserve an entertaining video? Can they go on a Jimmy Fallon, for example? Can they? Yes, yes. And I agree with you. I personally see it that way. I think that they should be able to do entertainment videos and then interviews and then serious political. I don't want to label him as gotcha, but more like gotcha.
Charlamagne Tha God
Just regular traditional news interviews.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, hard hitting, whatever. I think that both those things can exist.
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm old enough to remember when we.
Andrew Schultz
Saw Bill Clinton on Arsenio. Yes.
Charlamagne Tha God
And. But that was a thing. Right. It wasn't about whether or not them all.
Andrew Schultz
On Jimmy Kimmel. We see them all late night show. Yes, we see them. Right.
Charlamagne Tha God
Because it wasn't about a politician being able to handle 60 minutes. We know they can do that. When we wanted to see them in a human form. Well, that's, that's what the late night shows used to be for.
Andrew Schultz
I know, but I think that a narrative that you've seen right now which is like they don't deserve those kind of fun, entertaining interviews. They should be only getting the hard hitting ones. And I think that that. Oh, I think that narrative exists because obviously people are frustrated with like Trump being in power. Right. But what I would say if I was trying to like, really see through their lens is like, seeing someone be entertaining might be really nice, but they're really close to the levers of power that can drastically change people's lives. And I can see how that is scary for people who really don't like those people, while at the same time, I can see how it is euphoric if you really do like somebody. So, for example, if you see your candidate look amazing in an entertaining interview with somebody that is Bill Clinton on Arsenio, you're like, oh, shit, this guy's pretty fucking cool. I like him. Anyway, it was a criticism that I saw and I was like, ooh, okay, that's.
Charlamagne Tha God
I like this conversation. I think that it is cool to have an entertaining interview if what you have done while you're in office warrants some laughter. Meaning? Meaning. Meaning if things are good. If things are good, then we can have a nice, light hearted, funny conversation.
Andrew Schultz
Has there ever been a time, though, where half the country was.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, what's the definition of good?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah. Like, I think what happens is that.
Charlamagne Tha God
Half the country, Clinton in the 90s, half the country hated him.
Andrew Schultz
They were impeached him, literally, because he got some head, not because he got some head. And Clinton, and Clinton did everything the conservatives want, you know what I mean?
Charlamagne Tha God
That was the last time America had a surplus. Right, Right. So the waste that people are talking about, Doge was supposed to cut. Clinton actually did it in a successful way. I think that warrants some like, yo, you know what? Salute to you. You got some head and you've got the economy booming, bro. Like, come on. At that time, if I'm a late night host, we having a ball. You got the economy booming and you, a guy that we know got some head.
Andrew Schultz
People vote with their wallets. You're not wrong. Listen, you're not wrong. But I think to Chris's point, like, still half the country is going to be incredibly frustrated because they're not seeing.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's always going to be the case though, right? Even out of outside of politics. Like, yes, if you get on stage right now and make a joke, there might be half of the country that lasts and half of the country that's outraged. Go back to what I said about the rule of 10. Three people going to like it. Three people not going to like it. Four people don't even know what the fuck is going on. You can't please everybody who pleases Everybody.
Andrew Schultz
I agree with you. I agree with you to a certain extent. I think sometimes jokes cut through. I think jokes especially that aren't, like, politically targeted. Like, obviously, anytime Trump is in office, like, everything is just so charged. Every moment is so charged.
Charlamagne Tha God
Well, that's his fault.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, I mean, like, that is. That is the gravity that he brings to it. Like, people who don't care about politics all of a sudden get really invested because they see this shit.
Charlamagne Tha God
And yeah, I think because what he does, you can see the actual impact. Maybe because we're older now, so we see the impact of everything presidents do. When we were younger, we didn't see it. Me and Chris was having this conversation, and I know y' all don't like brilliant to talk about politics, but guess what? We don't give a fuck. So listen, me and Chris was talking about this because I was telling Chris.
Andrew Schultz
I personally believe we got collectively $200 million.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what you're talking about. We don't got.
Andrew Schultz
We got collectively $200 million.
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm just talking about Brian. Nadia's has been doing good for a time. Long, long time, though. I'm just saying Brilliant has been doing very well for the last 13 years. Thank you to all our brilliant listeners that listen. But I was telling Chris, in my lifetime, and Donald Trump still has three years, right? In my lifetime, George W. Bush has been the worst president ever. We look at it through rose colored glasses now because Michelle Obama passes them candy at events, but George W. Bush was the worst president ever. Run down the list now.
Andrew Schultz
Now, if you're looking at actual, like, bodies stacked up because of decisions that he made, it's not even, let's start.
Charlamagne Tha God
An election was stolen. An election was motherfucking stolen in 2000, right? Then you go, you got the Iraq war. That was that. That happened because of a lie. Weapons of mass destruction. There wasn't the weapons of mass destruction went in there, took Saddam Hussein out, took over the oil. Hundreds of thousands of people, killed trillions of dollars.
Andrew Schultz
My favorite. Yeah, go on. That's my favorite.
Charlamagne Tha God
Who started the forever Wars?
Andrew Schultz
That's my favorite criticism. When they're. When they're like, you guys weren't prepared to have a conversation with Trump. It's like, I've literally read articles of you guys telling us to go to war in Iraq.
Charlamagne Tha God
Right?
Andrew Schultz
Do you know, like, media outlets that are critical of having Trump on a podcast were the same media outlets that telling us their weapons of mass destruction. They put the entire media platform into getting us into a War where a million fucking people died.
Charlamagne Tha God
Hundreds of thousands of people died. Trillions of dollars spent. Then we talk about the forever wars. Afghanistan, right. That was Bush. Hurricane Katrina. That made Kanye stand up and say, George Bush don't care about black people. You talk about incompetence. The fact that they were telling him that there was intelligence that said 911 could happen, but he ignored it. And then when 911 actually happened, they catch him in the fucking daycare reading the kids. And the book is upside down.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, legit daycare.
Charlamagne Tha God
You're talking about, you're talking about, you talking about collapsing in economy. Think about all the housing crisis. Think about all the jobs that were lost. We were in a motherfucking recession. For real, for real. Back when George W. Bush was in office. These are good, fair points. George W. Bush was so terrible. And cover your ears, Schultz and Chris, that America elected a nigga. That's how terrible George W. Bush was as a president. Well, because Michelle Obama passes him candy at a fence.
Andrew Schultz
All right.
Charlamagne Tha God
We forget all of those things.
Andrew Schultz
But this is what happens.
Charlamagne Tha God
I feel like with President ICE was created under Bush.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
I mean like Vice was created in 2003.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah. I don't think that the creation of ICE is the issue. I think it's the implementation, how they're doing it.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, yeah, but, but, but, but you can have it. I sent you this article, Chris. I think up until this year, the most ever deaths in ICE custody was under Bush. Wow. Let me look that up, make sure. I'm saying that I think the difference is Donald Trump is threatening institutions and democracy like we've never seen. Yeah. I feel like this thing could collapse pretty quickly. And as much as, you know, I went and protested against Bush when he was elected, I went to D.C. and I marched. I was, you know, not happy with his presidency. I didn't feel like this whole thing might fall apart. And that's how it feels. That's the difference. I mean, Donald Trump is threatening institutions and democracies in ways that nobody ever has. Yeah, that's, that's a feeling.
Andrew Schultz
And I, and I think that, I think that the frustration, like I also think, Chris, at that time there was a lot more top down control of the information that the average person.
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, for sure. Yeah.
Andrew Schultz
And like as we know now, the media, you know, the media complex was complicit in pushing this propaganda. Right. It's like a war on terror or whatever the fuck that they were making us that.
Charlamagne Tha God
Well, maybe the Times specifically, if that's what you're referring To, I mean, that's probably the best because they advocated for it.
Andrew Schultz
That's what I'm saying is that they were, they were supported and I imagine there's some top down pressure on them to advocate for it.
Charlamagne Tha God
Right.
Andrew Schultz
So, like, whereas now, you know, with the decentralization of information and news, like everybody's putting a video up and they're saying this, that the other know what the hell to think. And I think that it's one. It's terrifying, but it's also very frustrating. You don't know what's real. I don't know a video I watch, I don't know if it's real or not.
Charlamagne Tha God
It's a perfect storm right now. And unfortunately, Trump is the worst person to be in this position at this moment. Like, you can be critical, but like, ultimately, I think everyone loves America. This thing has been largely working. Yes. Even with faults. Yeah. You wanted to keep working with adjustments and twists and corrections, not huge swings. And now it feels like that's the difference. The system is gonna collapse. Yes. Donald Trump is the scary thing. 2025 was ICE's deadliest year in two decades.
Andrew Schultz
Wow.
Charlamagne Tha God
Who was the president in 2005? So he was responsible for the deadliest year with ICE two decades ago.
Andrew Schultz
Right.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's all. Imagine we had social media during the Bush era.
Andrew Schultz
Well, that's what I'm saying is that things would have been very different, you know, and like, I think social media amplifies everything because the most salacious thing wins. So you're gonna have the most salacious thing on your phone all day, every day, and it's gonna induce that anxiety. And I'm sure the thing that you felt during Bush, if you are scrolling social media now, you probably feel it tenfold.
Charlamagne Tha God
And that's what made me start looking that up. Right.
Andrew Schultz
I thought, imagine we were getting that during Bush. Like, imagine we were getting these numbers of these people dying and then soldiers coming back and doing interviews and being like, what the fuck are we doing here? We don't even know what's going on. There's no weapons of mass. Imagine if we felt that gaslit that lied to, and we were digesting that information on massive platforms while the media was propagandizing us in a different direction.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's right.
Andrew Schultz
Imagine the frustration we would feel then.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's what made me even look into it. Right. Cause I was thinking about, Sorry to cut you.
Andrew Schultz
The media can't even really lie that well now. Like, they try to, they try to push certain things.
Charlamagne Tha God
Nah, they can't I mean, nah, nah.
Andrew Schultz
But then they get checked, and they have to. They have to, like. I guess it's not even the media, though.
Charlamagne Tha God
It's like. It's like elected officials, right? Meaning back in the day, Bush could say there's weapons of mass destruction in Iraq and get away with it.
Andrew Schultz
Elected officials are held accountable. Now, we know what you voted on.
Charlamagne Tha God
And we got eyes of. What's the role of a comedy in this equation? Right? Because if you think about that, when you say lying about weapons of mass destruction with Bush, I immediately flashed to Chappelle in the yellow cake skit, right? Or the yellow cake skit, I forgot when he holds the whole fake press conference. And most definitely. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yellow cake at the table. And he's like, oil.
Andrew Schultz
What?
Charlamagne Tha God
Oil clears the table off. Yeah, the motherfucker bought some yellow cake today in Africa.
Andrew Schultz
He went to Africa and he bought yellow cake.
Charlamagne Tha God
Are you sure? Yes, I'm sure, bitch.
Andrew Schultz
I got the head of the CIA right here. He'll tell you.
Charlamagne Tha God
Are you sure?
Andrew Schultz
Are you sure?
Charlamagne Tha God
I can't believe you, motherfucker. You take stuff ridiculous. Ridiculous. Me and Jeb just coming back from Africa, cradle a fucking civilization, and this nigga out here buying yellow cake from the motherland. Are you sure it was yellow cake? Y' all niggas don't believe me. I got some yellow cake right here. Look, you see? You believe this shit? Now, don't drop that shit. I know. I know what to do with it. I got it wrapped up in this special CIA napkin. Drop that shit. Yeah. Hope I don't drop this shit.
Andrew Schultz
Pray to God you don't drop that shit.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yellow cake.
Andrew Schultz
Fucking right.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's a way that the comedy absolutely cuts through what's actually happening. Absolutely makes commentary on it, but it's also entertaining. It brings attention and awareness to it. Because, you know, you see that sketch, and even if you don't know what he's talking about, you may want to know something. You go do a little bit more research. So even if the Times are saying, no, we have to do it, and these are all the geopolitical reasons we have to go in, Chappelle was able to. Bullshit. That's right.
Andrew Schultz
But there's a.
Charlamagne Tha God
Send it up.
Andrew Schultz
There's a value, I think, especially, like, during that time where maybe it was more censorious or maybe there was just less information out there. And that's, I think, where like, comedy or even, like, edgy or inappropriate jokes kind of thrives because it allows you to tell not the truth, but at least, like, the emotional sentiment of the time. And I think what's happened now is largely, I think, because of Elon allowing you to say whatever you want on X. You call that free speech, and that's fine. And I'm a big free speech guy, obviously. But, like, there is nothing, there's no joke edgier, than what some random creator is going to say on X.
Charlamagne Tha God
Right.
Andrew Schultz
You know what I mean? Like, there's no wild joke that you will hear where you will make you go, ooh, more than some random person is gonna post or stream or say.
Charlamagne Tha God
There's also no sitcom that's gonna make you laugh more than the comments of a certain post. Like, comedy is in the hands of the people right now.
Andrew Schultz
But in a weird way, comedy, I think, and I've always said this, I think it thrives during censorship, right. Because it's the only way out. It's like that Oscar Wilde quote, if you want to tell some of the truth, make them laugh. If not, they'll kill you. Like the role of the Jester, if you want to even, like, look back, it's like, the Jester could make fun of the King. Nobody else can make fun of the King. They cut your fuck off. But the Jester could. And. But now we're. We're existing at a time where, like, you can really say whatever you want, true or false, about anybody or anything or any story that's happening right now with almost zero repercussions. That's a weird time. Like, how does comedy fit in that time?
Charlamagne Tha God
You're right. Can I keep going in on Bush? I want some more things.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, sure, sure.
Charlamagne Tha God
Guantanamo Bay opened, right? So. So enhanced interrogation, which people considered torture, was normalized. Warrantless wiretapping, expanded government surveillance, all the massive deficits and tax cuts for the wealthy. He turned the Clinton era surpluses into deep deficits. Yeah. And damaged the US Global credibility. I think I hit on everything. Yes. And the reason I even looked all of that stuff up is because I was looking for a case of optimism. I'm like, yo, America, we've had to.
Andrew Schultz
Have gone through some, through rough times, some worse times.
Charlamagne Tha God
Don't get me wrong, it's fucked up now. We've never seen, you know, democracy and institutions threatened the way they are right now. But I'm like, when do I remember.
Andrew Schultz
People feeling, like, this angst and this frustration?
Charlamagne Tha God
And I had to think. And I was like, oh, before Obama? Because Obama was kind of like you said, the audacity of hope. Obama was the optimism. Right. Like this is what the country could be, dude. So I was like, oh, Bush. And then I started just thinking about all of the things that happened under Bush, and it's right there, dude. And I remember when they used to say Bush was the devil and Dick Cheney was the devil, and those guys were the Antichrist, and those guys were the death of democracy. I remember that back then. I remember when Bush had to give out Bush bucks. Same shit. They had to send out checks.
Andrew Schultz
Remember?
Charlamagne Tha God
It was like, a $750 check. You don't remember that? I remember all of that shit, man.
Andrew Schultz
But it is interesting, though. Like. Yeah, it is interesting. I think people are feeling that same, like, angst and frustration and like. Like, that hopelessness and. But I. I get it. I get it. You're seeing things cost way more, right? You're not seeing upward mobility at your job, man. You know, groceries are more expensive, but you're not making more money. You're seeing AI come and replace jobs around you. You're starting to go, well, is my.
Charlamagne Tha God
Job watching these people walk around with mask on, you know, killing American citizens? Like.
Andrew Schultz
Like, you know, busting up shops, chasing people in the street, right?
Charlamagne Tha God
Come on, man. Come on.
Andrew Schultz
You seeing, you know, radio hosts make $200 million. Like, nothing makes sense.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know.
Andrew Schultz
Nothing makes sense.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what you're talking about. Shout out to Drew Ski, man. Yo, they mad at Drew Ski. Yo, they mad at Drew Ski. Before. They mad at Drew Ski. Before we go, they mad at Drew Ski because Drewski did a skit, okay? And this skit is about mega churches, man. And, you know, I don't even know if you. Would it even make sense to play it? Well, not some parts.
Andrew Schultz
You could hear it.
Charlamagne Tha God
Here's the thing. I don't understand any of the backlash that Drew Ski is getting from this, because there's no reason to be mad at Drew Ski. This is what you call a spoof.
Andrew Schultz
He's a comedian making joke.
Charlamagne Tha God
So he just imitated. So be mad at the people he's spoofing.
Andrew Schultz
Yes.
Charlamagne Tha God
Art reflects reality. Yeah, I think he's spoofing reality. He got this from somewhere.
Andrew Schultz
I agree. Like, I. And I'm always going to defend comedians making jokes. I think that, like, there are some people that. Especially with religion, man, especially with God, they take it very serious.
Charlamagne Tha God
You saying God? No, he's making fun of the pastors. Well, he's not making fun of God.
Andrew Schultz
Where does a pastor work?
Charlamagne Tha God
Church. Okay, but that don't mean there's God there. If you Have a. If you have a church now we're in the. No, no, no. What I mean is if you're a pastor and you're not pastoring the right way and you're pastoring for the wrong reasons and you're using the Bible and religion and God to take advantage of people. God don't exist in that church.
Andrew Schultz
Well, what if, what if you're part of that flock and you don't think that's what the pastor's doing?
Charlamagne Tha God
Well, Satan got a kingdom too.
Andrew Schultz
So you, you're taking the argument that these pastors are corrupt?
Charlamagne Tha God
If you're a corrupt pastor, yes. If you're a corrupt pastor, you are not submitting your will to God. You're submitting your will to Satan.
Andrew Schultz
That is, is true. 100%.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah.
Andrew Schultz
We don't like corruption.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah.
Andrew Schultz
You know, now again, the problem isn't the institution. The problem is the people running it.
Charlamagne Tha God
And that's who Drew Ski's making fun of. Drewski's making fun of the people who run the institutions. Like not once in here to me did he insult the church. He's acting like how these, some of these mega pastors act coming in. Yeah. Play some of it.
Andrew Schultz
It's funny.
Charlamagne Tha God
He had one bar in here that was hilarious. Wanda told us earlier this month that she could not have a baby anymore. So I impregnated her with the word of Go. I'm going to impregnate everyone with the word of God. You going to get pregnant with the word of God? You going to get pregnant with the word of God? You going to get pregnant with the word of God? I had somebody in the congregation ask why I'm wearing Christian Dior and Christian Lubouton. Hilarious. Cuz I'm a Christian and I walk in the blood of Jesus. Hilarious. Give him some praise. Hilarious. Christian father work and I walk in the blood of Jesus. Give him some praise with the red bottoms on. Hilarious. So we are raising funds for a project in Zimbabwe. Yes. We are trying to get our congregation over in Africa. Amen. We wanted to raise $4 million for that.
Andrew Schultz
Amen.
Charlamagne Tha God
Hallelujah. That needs to appear today. We are not letting anyone leave until we reach our goal. Amen.
Andrew Schultz
Hallelujah. Life savings here.
Charlamagne Tha God
Give him some praise for that. Give it his life savings up. Apostle Richie says, baby, can you help me? I said can you help me? I said I can you help me? I'm gonna finish this word here and I'm gonna do the Christian version. Don't worry about it. I'm gonna do the Christian version. I'm driving this Billy Bentega. Cause I believe in Christ. Can you leap on your legs Like a survivor? Can you leap on your legs? He did a production, and he casted that shit. Praise the Lord. I need you to pray for my wife. Hey, come on, man. Hey, get. Get your hands off my car. You gave ties and offering. No. Back the up, man. Drew Ski goaded, bro. I don't care what y' all say.
Andrew Schultz
I love it.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, I love it. Yeah. Y' all got mad at me last year when I told you it's my personal opinion. I find Drew Ski funnier than Key and Peele. That's just my personal opinion. Okay. Don't know what to tell y'. All. Okay. I think that when it comes to characters, smokes them. Now, when it comes to, you know, the writing, I'll get at the Key and Peele, but when it comes to, like, performing a character, Drew Ski all.
Andrew Schultz
It's a different type of sketch.
Charlamagne Tha God
Different type of sketch, man. Different type of sketch. And I will. Me and Donnell Rollins was having a conversation, and he made me see that. He was like. Like, Drew Ski is a character.
Andrew Schultz
Yes.
Charlamagne Tha God
I forgot what he called it. I think he called him a character actor.
Andrew Schultz
He's a character actor 100%.
Charlamagne Tha God
There's not too many character actors better than Drewski.
Andrew Schultz
He's phenomenal.
Charlamagne Tha God
He is, man. I don't even know why the rest of y' all create content. I'm gonna be honest with you. I'm Be honest, to me, if I was a content creator, that would be my bar. Like, if I was doing sketches and stuff, I'm like, if I can't get to that, what am I doing it for? Like, when you just got your little phone up and you doing a little switch. Everybody got to start somewhere. I guess I'm talking about to the older content creators, not the younger ones. The younger ones got to start somewhere. But for the one that's been doing it for a while, yeah, Drew Ski took it to another level.
Andrew Schultz
That's what I appreciate about it. He keeps leveling up. Like, there's production value in this. He got extras. They rented out a whole theater. They're hanging them from the ceiling. Like, this is in him.
Charlamagne Tha God
Kevin Hart and Kast and I are gold, too. I like them.
Andrew Schultz
They got great chemistry. Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
But that's just. That's just dope because they're showing that they can do stuff like this, right? Like, that's when you just sitting around and you just talking and you chopping it Up. But that right there is what he's doing with the sketches. That's like, when you started doing the turning the camera sideways, you was like, you know what? Everybody's sitting around during COVID y' all just talking into the camera. Let's turn it into a real production. What ended up happening? You ended up getting the Netflix goddamn special. You know what I'm saying? Everybody talking about the standup short Saves America was actually the first.
Andrew Schultz
That was the first. The first joint thing we did on Netflix.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. I'm just saying, if you have to mean and you have the resources and you're able to do sketches to that level, do it.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
You're only investing in yourself 100%. You know what I mean? Like, and you only gonna get back what you put in. I saw Drewski's numbers. They said this is his most watched sketch ever.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, of course. I imagine on X that shit went crazy.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. Cause three reasons. Number one, it's good, right?
Andrew Schultz
Hilarious.
Charlamagne Tha God
Number two, it starts a conversation and.
Andrew Schultz
People being upset about people being upset. And outrage tends to be, are people.
Charlamagne Tha God
Really upset or just, like, two people? I mean, they're upset. You know, the media will do it. They're upset because they need content as well.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Like, everybody's creating content all day long. That's why y' all gotta stop being upset at people like us. Cause what would you do without us? Remember when Scarface said, we the motherfucking bad guys? You couldn't do nothing without us.
Andrew Schultz
You need people like me so you.
Charlamagne Tha God
Can point your fucking fingers.
Andrew Schultz
Let's say that's the bad guy.
Charlamagne Tha God
Batman needs a joker. Yeah. Okay. You need people to be upset about. Okay. You don't have the balls to take risks. I'm saying you don't have the balls to take risks. So the people that take risk, and sometimes we get it right, sometimes we get it wrong, but we always give you something to talk about.
Andrew Schultz
That's right. You could create or you could react.
Charlamagne Tha God
You can create or you can motherfucking react. What else we got? Taylor, you want to pay some bills? You want to pay some bills to come back? Let's pay some bills, man. I am your host, Stassi Schroeder. Welcome to Tell Me Lies, the official podcast. What's the most unhinged thing of season three?
Andrew Schultz
Steven.
Charlamagne Tha God
Because he's so evil, I do think he is misunderstood. You see, everyone face consequences.
Andrew Schultz
It's intoxicating.
Charlamagne Tha God
The writers just know. Know how to trick. Yeah. There's always a twist in this show.
Andrew Schultz
So nothing you would expect Tell Me.
Charlamagne Tha God
Lies, the official podcast now streaming and stream the new season of Tell Me Lies on Hulu and Hulu on Disney.
Andrew Schultz
All right guys, we take a break for a second. This podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and succeed online. Whether you're starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offering with a professional website, grow your brand and get paid all in one place. Make smarter business decisions with Squarespace's intuitive built in analytics tools. Review website traffic, learn where to focus engagement. Attract revenue from bookings, invoices and product sales all from one place. Looking to grow your business now you can get fast, easy financing through Squarespace Capital. This application process takes just a few minutes and approval happens in a matter of days. If you're approved, funds will be deposited in your bank account in three to four business days. So you can grow quickly, avoid the hassle of the traditional loan process and easily access financing through Squarespace Capital. Loans are issued by Celtic bank and Service by stripe. All loans are subject to credit approval. So head to squarespace.com for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, go to the use the offer code IDIOTS. To save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.
Charlamagne Tha God
We got any church announcements? Heather Kyle Walker.
Andrew Schultz
My church announcement is, you know, Charlamagne, The God has $200 million. I don't know what you're talking about, man.
Charlamagne Tha God
I have no idea.
Andrew Schultz
200 million more than he had last month.
Charlamagne Tha God
I have no idea.
Andrew Schultz
That's my only talking announcement. Ask him for loans, Ask him for debt forgiveness. You know what I mean?
Charlamagne Tha God
By the way, number one, that number you talking is crazy. But also hypothetically, if that number was real, they don't get that in your bank account. How would you know? Yeah, you would know.
Andrew Schultz
How would you know?
Charlamagne Tha God
No, I have a multi year deal. Like this is common sense. Like if you see an NBA player get that kind of money, they don't give them that. If an NBA player gets a max contract, they don't say here you get paid annually. Yeah. How many years is the deal? I don't know what you're talking about. Listen, are you done with your church announcement?
Andrew Schultz
I'm done with my church now.
Charlamagne Tha God
My church announcements. It's multi year though. My church announcements, man. I got a few, actually. Two chains. His book, the voice in my Head is God will be out March 3, 2026 via black privilege Publishing. Arsenio hall will be on sale April 7th of this year. And Jess Hilarious will be on sale April 28th for this year. So please go out there and pre order all those books. I'm sure you're gonna see all of those individuals out on their various book tours on different late night shows and daytime talk shows. So salute to, you know, all of those individuals we're putting out this year. And I want to salute the NAACP Image Awards. I want y' all to go to naacpimageawards.com and vote because we have some really great productions that are nominated for NAACP Image Awards. My man John Hope Bryant and Jay Barnett, both of their podcasts are nominated. Money and Wealth Podcast is John Hope Bryant, Just Hill is Jay Barnett. They're both nominated at the NAACP Image Awards. That's Black Effect. So salute to everybody at Black Effect. Don Staley's book Uncommon Favor is nominated for a literary award at the NAACP Awards. That's Black Privilege Publishing, so go vote for that. And oh, Native Land podcast. Angela Rai, Andrew Gilliam and Bakari Sellers, that's reason Choice Media, iHeart, they're nominated. And Kingsland, which is an audio scripted project that me and Kevin Hart did for Audible, that's nominated for NAACP Image Award as well. So, you know, go vote, vote, vote. Go to naacpimageawards.com and vote, vote, vote, vote, vote. Then my church announcement is I'm doing.
Andrew Schultz
A benefit show, canceled comedy, which is my brand.
Charlamagne Tha God
We're doing a benefit show with food.
Andrew Schultz
Bank for NYC January 24th at the hard Rock Cafe. Some of the performers, we have Ronnie.
Charlamagne Tha God
Chang, we have Sam Rill, we have.
Andrew Schultz
Have Mark Gagnon, a lot of others, some really funny guys. All the proceeds goes to Food bank for nyc.
Charlamagne Tha God
So that's included with the admission. It's none of that to drink minimum shit.
Andrew Schultz
It's just buy a ticket, have some laughs. So head to cancel comedy x dot.
Charlamagne Tha God
Com, get your ticket there. And if you want to call in and speak with me live, I do a live show on Sundays, AM mornings. Just go to ammornings.com See you there.
Andrew Schultz
Peace.
Charlamagne Tha God
Let's get back to the show. What else we got? Man, it's so much we've been gone for so goddamn long to talk about, man. What? What? Oh, this was crazy. This was crazy. Okay, first of all, let me give you some context. Jay Z sat down. This was from a couple of years ago, actually, because this was the rookie class of that year. Because I see Khalid. What's Khalid? Last name quarterback for the Bears, Khalil Williams.
Andrew Schultz
Caleb.
Charlamagne Tha God
Caleb. I don't.
Andrew Schultz
Caleb Williams.
Charlamagne Tha God
Caleb. Caleb Williams. Yes. This is the rookie class from a couple of years ago. And I guess Michael Rubin set up a conversation with them, and I guess he asked all of them, would you rather $500,000 dinner with Jay Z? And they was like, well, we got these nice rookie deals, so let's just take the dinner. And Jay Z gave him some good words. Let's listen. The people that keep it real with you don't just kiss your ass and just tell you what you want to hear.
Andrew Schultz
Tell.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yo, bro, it's been three days, man. You ain't hitting it hard anymore. You're not working out. You're not. You're not attacking it the same way, bro. Like, get in there, man. I'll come with you. What time is this running? Let's run. Six o'.
Andrew Schultz
Clock.
Charlamagne Tha God
Let's get up. Let's run, man. This is great advice. He was actually talking about yes men and how you shouldn't have yes people around you.
Andrew Schultz
But people pause him on this.
Charlamagne Tha God
You got to. That is part of not being a yes man. There is no way. You sit there and listen to. Play that again. Yo, y' all ain't hear what I got, gay ears. Show it's caught. It.
Andrew Schultz
It.
Charlamagne Tha God
Listen to what he said. The people that keep it real with you and don't just kiss your ass and just tell you what you want to hear.
Andrew Schultz
Tell.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yo, bro, it's been three days, man. You ain't. You ain't hitting it hard anymore. You're not working hard. You're not. You're not. You're not. You're not attacking it the same way, bro. Like, get in there, man. I'll come with you. That's pause. Like, no literal pause. Let's run, man. He's talking about not being a yes, yes, man.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
If you sat there and listened to Jay say that and didn't say, hey, yo, hey, yo, I'll hit him with a papause. Papause. Feel me on this one. Papause. You know what I'm saying? You are a yes man. Okay? Cause that was wild.
Andrew Schultz
He said, but are you pausing Jay at a dinner, bro?
Charlamagne Tha God
You got to. He said, bro, you ain't hitting it like you used to. You ain't hit it in three days. You gotta get in there and you gotta attack it. Come with me. Come. I'll come with you. So, Charlotte, you're saying pause? Who? You? Me?
Andrew Schultz
Yes.
Charlamagne Tha God
In that moment. Hey, you. First of all, the table would have died laughing. There's a Bunch of kids there. It's a bunch of rookies, you know what I mean? They'd have died laughing. Ok, Jay would have gave me a crazy look, but he would have had to admit, yeah, that was kind of crazy. That was kind of crazy. Yo, come on, man.
Andrew Schultz
I mean, preferencing it as saying, like, listen, I can't be a yes man, so.
Charlamagne Tha God
Exactly. That's what I would say. I would have said, listen, in the.
Andrew Schultz
Spirit of not being a yes man.
Charlamagne Tha God
In the spirit of not being a.
Andrew Schultz
Yes man, you gotta pause that shit.
Charlamagne Tha God
Hey, yo, Jay, that was. Wow, that was fucking crazy, bro. You not hitting. You ain't hit it in three days. Let's play one more time, Taylor. Matter of fact, go to my Instagram, man. I edited it nice for everybody.
Andrew Schultz
No, you didn't.
Charlamagne Tha God
My edit is better than this. See, I'm like. I'm like, what the. And I did it in the spirit of not being a yes man. You know what I'm saying? HOV has a sense of humor. Like, y' all act like HOV don't like the joke. Jesus Christ, you're calling him gay?
Andrew Schultz
No, we're not calling him gay.
Charlamagne Tha God
Stop acting like you don't know how this works, okay?
Andrew Schultz
Saying you said something that made me think something good, that was wild.
Charlamagne Tha God
Listen, three days, man. You ain't, you ain't hitting it hard anymore. You're not working out. You're not, you're not, you're not. You're not attacking it the same way, bro. Like, get in there, man. I'll come with you. What time is running?
Andrew Schultz
Let's run. Six o'. Clock.
Charlamagne Tha God
Let's get up. Let's run, man. Like, grow up. No.
Andrew Schultz
Why?
Charlamagne Tha God
Why should I grow up? Okay. What reason do I have to grow up? Who wants to grow up? Come on, man. I'm not growing up. I'm out here on peptides and shit, okay? I went to bed the other day. That's how much I don't want to grow up.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, yeah. This is where we started the pop before you started recording. Charlamagne said he wet the bed. Charlamagne said he wet the fucking bed. No.
Charlamagne Tha God
So crazy. I had a dream that I would.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, and then you start peeing, but.
Charlamagne Tha God
No, you know how you layin there? And I don't know if I was like in between sleep or not between sleep, but I'm thinking to myself, like, damn, when I used to dream about peeing, I would wet the bed, but also sweat a little bit when I sleep.
Andrew Schultz
So you didn't.
Charlamagne Tha God
So When I felt the little spot, I was just like, oh, I'm just sweating. And then when I came home later that day, my wife had all the sheets off the bed.
Andrew Schultz
She didn't text you?
Charlamagne Tha God
So I was like, damn, did I wet the bed? And I was like, yo, I didn't think I wet the bed. She didn't call me. I don't know if she think. I don't know if I told her that I think I went to bed. I did tell her. I said, I think I went to bed last night. And she was like, I just thought. I think it was just time to wet the sheets. I don't know if she was like, I don't know. And I don't know if I did or not, but I think I did. My point is, you know, you did. Hey, you know. Okay, well, I'm gonna tell you something. Nothing makes you feel more like a kid again than wetting the bed. Try it.
Andrew Schultz
What?
Charlamagne Tha God
Try it. When the last time y' all had it? When the last time you had a dream about wetting the bed? You've had them before, right? Yes, when I was a child. How did it make you feel? Not good.
Andrew Schultz
Not good.
Charlamagne Tha God
Like a child. Chris, you ever had a dream about wetting the bed? I think I still might have them. I don't. You see what I'm saying? Wet the bed every now and then, man, I wish I were in bed every now and then.
Andrew Schultz
I wish I was rich enough to not get up to pee in the night. That's what I wish. I Wish I had 200 million. I couldn't believe. So I can have to pee in the middle of the night. You just be like, I don't know.
Charlamagne Tha God
What you're talking about. It.
Andrew Schultz
I'll buy some new sheets.
Charlamagne Tha God
Listen, I couldn't believe it, though. I was like, oh, I had a. It felt like, man, it felt nostalgic. Like, y', all, I ain't had a dream about wetting the bed in a long fucking day.
Andrew Schultz
That's basically. Have you ever had a nocturnal emission?
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, the nut, yeah. Oh, yes. Come on, man.
Andrew Schultz
Okay, so it's normal that you wet the bed.
Charlamagne Tha God
Well, that's when ghosts used to fuck you in your sleep.
Andrew Schultz
It's interesting that you choose the ghost to fuck you. You. It's interesting. And you nut, it's interesting that that's what makes you come, is a ghost you. It could be a female ghost sucking you off. It could be a ghost riding your dick.
Charlamagne Tha God
But in this hypothetical, if a male ghost, you know where I'M going, if a male ghost suck you off. Are you gay? Nah, nah, it's a male ghost. No, but you're gay.
Andrew Schultz
Cause your subconscious is bringing men sucking your dicks.
Charlamagne Tha God
It's a ghost.
Andrew Schultz
Ghost. It's a ghost, bro.
Charlamagne Tha God
Penetration don't count.
Andrew Schultz
It's a ghost. It doesn't count.
Charlamagne Tha God
Poster guys.
Andrew Schultz
Penetration that don't count.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yo, you know what? I had a yes. Bed.
Andrew Schultz
Hey, yo, why?
Charlamagne Tha God
So listen, you wake up and slime was stuck in your. Right.
Andrew Schultz
I know who, like, of all the ghosts, like, why it gotta be slimer? I don't even know if slimer has a gender, you know? Like, of all the ghosts that exist.
Charlamagne Tha God
Okay, you're some ghosts have it, right? Yeah, yeah. I mean, depending on who it is. Like, let's say it's the ghost of somebody, you know? Well, when you get molested, who's it? What is it? White ghosts molested?
Andrew Schultz
What you bring in?
Charlamagne Tha God
What's going on? A ghost can molest you, Chris.
Andrew Schultz
What's happening to you, huh?
Charlamagne Tha God
When they visit you? Yes, when you get visited.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's molesting then. No, he's don't have any molesting.
Andrew Schultz
He's dreaming it up.
Charlamagne Tha God
But I'm saying, generally, what type of ghosts are they? Oh, I've never seen the ghost. I just assume that. I'm just saying, if you woke up right from a nocturnal admission and you could see the poltergeist, and it was a male poltergeist wiping his mouth, like, what would you think?
Andrew Schultz
Man, that's a lot to share.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, that's. You got a lot to show. That never happened to me.
Andrew Schultz
It's just a lot to share. It's like, yo, I saw a ghost last night already. That's not believable.
Charlamagne Tha God
Why not?
Andrew Schultz
Most people don't believe in ghosts.
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, that's not my fault. Grow up, okay? That's when you should grow up, okay? When you sleeping and you wet the bed, you don't grow up. But if you want to grow up, then you need to believe in ghosts. Why would you?
Andrew Schultz
I think if a male ghost visited me in the middle of the night, sucked me off, I think I would also say I peed the bed.
Charlamagne Tha God
Damn.
Andrew Schultz
I think I would say that too.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't think there's anything wrong with paranormal porno activity. Do your thing, man. Ain't nothing wrong with it. I'm just asking if it was a male ghost. 2026, man. No, I'm just saying if it was a male ghost.
Andrew Schultz
What is that?
Charlamagne Tha God
Can you say that you had a homosexual experience? No, no, exactly. It's a ghost.
Andrew Schultz
They're dead now.
Charlamagne Tha God
Are you gay in the afterlife? Like when the ghost goes back and.
Andrew Schultz
Tell everybody the ghost is gay but you're not gay?
Charlamagne Tha God
The ghost is gay.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's crazy.
Andrew Schultz
Ghost is gay.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's crazy.
Andrew Schultz
Not crazy. They were gay people back in the day.
Charlamagne Tha God
What does this article tell?
Andrew Schultz
What the is going on?
Charlamagne Tha God
Why is Chris wiping his. Did you see that shit, man?
Andrew Schultz
He's out here like, man, I can't.
Charlamagne Tha God
Wait to be a ghost so I can live out my wildest. Almost bedtime.
Andrew Schultz
Chris, let's say you become a ghost. Who you sucking first, man?
Charlamagne Tha God
What you going to do now? I have to suck somebody?
Andrew Schultz
Well, in this hypothetical.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, I don't.
Andrew Schultz
Or who you smashing first if you're a ghost?
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't want to show my hand right now. Yo, Drew Ski, let that be your next sketch. Yo, a gay Freddy Krueger. A gay Freddy Krueger. That's like hunting like the most homopho. What's the most Google. What's the most homophobic zip code in America?
Andrew Schultz
His glove is just dildos.
Charlamagne Tha God
Five dildos. Five dildOS on his glass. Up. Google, what's the most homophobic zip code in America? Probably like Salt Lake City or something. You see what I'm saying? Imagine everybody homophobic, afraid to sleep because Freddy Krueger got five. Got a claw with five dildos. Oh my God. And he's fingering you in your sleep.
Andrew Schultz
No. That's terrifying.
Charlamagne Tha God
Jesus Christ. What else we got, Taylor? So supposedly this guy has a micro penis and now he's out talking about it. So I have the actual. But why does it say. Why did the headline say Inside the cursed lives of two men with the world's smallest and largest penises?
Andrew Schultz
I guess it's both, I think. Yeah. Which one does he got? He is a small one. So I'm about to.
Charlamagne Tha God
What's small?
Andrew Schultz
Hold on. I might just play the interview for you. Welcome back.
Charlamagne Tha God
Now then, here at this Morning, we've.
Andrew Schultz
Never shied away from tackling real life matters. And today we're talking about what might be the last taboo.
Charlamagne Tha God
With the average UK penis size around.
Andrew Schultz
5.2 inches, our next guest measures up.
Charlamagne Tha God
To just 0.388 inches.
Andrew Schultz
That's about the size of garden pea.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. 38 year old Michael Phillips was medically diagnosed with my.
Andrew Schultz
This can't be real, bro. This can't be real. Which he believes could well be the.
Charlamagne Tha God
Smallest in the world. It's left him unable to be intimate. And he's even had to try fat.
Andrew Schultz
Injections to see if that can help. But while they proved unsuccessful, Michael wants.
Charlamagne Tha God
To help other men feel better about their own bodies. And he's here now. Good morning. Thank you for joining us, Michael.
Andrew Schultz
Thank you so much. We've been talking about this, and it's.
Charlamagne Tha God
So important that you're here and you're sitting on the couch and prepared to talk about it. Why is it so important to you? I guess because it should be, like, known that it's a medical condition that can cause it and that if more people realize that it was a condition when they're younger, that they could be taken and seen by a doctor and hopefully get treatment that would actually provide some. Some level. How does he even jack by the time you. Eventually his fingers are too big to even jack off a 0.38-inch penis, bro.
Andrew Schultz
I mean, do they show it? No, I don't want to see it.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't want to see it. Right? You want to see that little thumb screw? Is a thumb screw even as big as that? The thumb screw's smaller than that, right? This is crazy. I feel sorry for this guy.
Andrew Schultz
Scroll down, man.
Charlamagne Tha God
You know why I feel sorry for guys with small penises, man? Cause there's nothing they can do about it, bro. Like, there's no amount of money. There's no surgery. Like, there's nothing you can do like women can. I thought there was enlargement pills or something. Yeah, but it just makes it like fat like a Pringles can. You know what I'm saying? Like, it's still like a little snack sized. Pringles can, like, a woman can go get breasts. A woman can go get a bbl. A woman can go get lip injections. You can't do nothing with that. Opal point, how big is 0.38?
Andrew Schultz
You gotta cut it off, man.
Charlamagne Tha God
You might as well go trans, yo.
Andrew Schultz
You gotta cut it off and scoop it out.
Charlamagne Tha God
Go trans. Turn it over.
Andrew Schultz
You could have the smallest penis or the tightest, bro.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, man. Yeah. You already got the clit. You build around it.
Andrew Schultz
That's true.
Charlamagne Tha God
Leave that. Leave the clit. Leave it and build around it. This is crazy. I feel fun.
Andrew Schultz
If the moment that you discover that.
Charlamagne Tha God
And knowledge is power, and then you can go and get some help, tell why he says something and then he goes, I thought I could enlarge. You had a really small penis. I would say probably around high school, right? And dealing with, like, girlfriends and stuff like that. But I was always, like, under the Belief that, like, maybe. Like, I'm a late bloomer. Yeah, maybe one day. So you're waiting for puberty to have an impact, and that was going to happen, and then it never did. It just never did. Well, I don't get those kind of interviews. Taylor. Book them kind of interviews for me every now and then. Can we not. Can I. Can I not talk to the man with the world's smallest penis on the Breakfast Club? We coming to Netflix January 26th. This is the kind of entertainment people want, bro. Can I not talk to the man with the world's smallest penis? Not one time. Jesus Christ. God bless him. Yo, well, Chris, say what you said. You said you were asking, like, how do you. Do you tell the girl or you just. Well, that'd be my question. Do you lead with that information if you meet somebody?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, because it's. No, you don't. Friends.
Charlamagne Tha God
You don't.
Andrew Schultz
What do you mean, no, you don't.
Charlamagne Tha God
You know how many girls are with guys that don't aren't big? 0.38.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, you know how much? Old point. That's less than an inch. That's like a half of an inch.
Andrew Schultz
That's your nail pretty much. I don't even know if you could hang a jacket.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, it's like you was in the factory and, like, the workers just stopped. They was like, I'm tired. They just sit him down there. You know what I'm saying? Gave him everything else except for a cock ejaculate then. Or it just goes all over him. Really?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, probably.
Charlamagne Tha God
Honestly?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. How do you. No, he can let it load off. He just sits down. He don't gotta stand up. He gotta sit when he pee.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
God, I don't know if you can.
Andrew Schultz
Sit in pee because it will come right through the space.
Charlamagne Tha God
Gotta go trans, homie.
Andrew Schultz
Yes. Gotta go transit. Sit on the balls. It's gonna sit on the balls.
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm not the biggest, but I don't gotta touch it all the time. I'll say that.
Andrew Schultz
What does that mean?
Charlamagne Tha God
Like, sometimes I be like this just to do it.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying?
Charlamagne Tha God
Put your hands behind your back and just let that thing hang and piss. Perfect aim, baby.
Andrew Schultz
That's how you look at bed at night, huh?
Charlamagne Tha God
What else we got? What else we got? Oh, Autistic Barbie. They got the autistic Barbie, yo.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, that was crazy. Crazy.
Charlamagne Tha God
Not gonna get that for your kids.
Andrew Schultz
I mean, aren't all Barbies autistic? Like, what's more autistic Artistic about. Autistic about this.
Charlamagne Tha God
Why doesn't that dude with that little penis identify as a Barbie? You know? You know what I mean? Or identify. Hey, all you can identify as a kin they don't have down there, bro. Like, he's a Mattel doll. That's what he should do, man.
Andrew Schultz
He's a real life Mattel doll.
Charlamagne Tha God
He real life Mattel doll. First of all, I don't understand why this Barbie is autistic. Like, I don't get it. Like it.
Andrew Schultz
What makes it autistic? Yeah, Headphones and the. In a flower.
Charlamagne Tha God
I. I remember when they did the down syndrome Barbie. I thought that was racist, but that's racist or whatever it is.
Andrew Schultz
But this, there's nothing about this that screams autism.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. Like what is it? What does it say? Let me read it. Let me read it.
Andrew Schultz
I think that's that spinner thing.
Charlamagne Tha God
What spinner thing? That's a fidget spinner. You can't have a fidget.
Andrew Schultz
Can't fidget. That's. I fidget.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's not hard.
Andrew Schultz
I play with my mustache. That means I'm autistic.
Charlamagne Tha God
Everybody's autistic then. No, but a lot. They need like something to be doing.
Andrew Schultz
We all need something. I'm literally flipping my phone.
Charlamagne Tha God
You a little on the spectrum?
Andrew Schultz
I might be.
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't like the standard.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah, I don't like it either.
Charlamagne Tha God
Wax there. As for the look of the new doll, Mattel says the eyes of the new Barbie shift slightly to the side. That represent how some people with autism sometimes avoid direct contact. The doll also was given articulated elbows and wrists to acknowledge what? Oh, yeah, stimming. Sometimes they do like the over extensions. Stimming, hand flapping and other justice that some autistic people use to process sensory information or to express excitement. Yeah, Mattel running out of shit to do.
Andrew Schultz
Just get him a train set, man. I don't think a doll is what the autistic kid wants.
Charlamagne Tha God
Get him a calculator. Yeah, I think the kids smart as.
Andrew Schultz
There you go.
Charlamagne Tha God
I think the kids be figuring out.
Andrew Schultz
So many problems that might be redundant.
Charlamagne Tha God
Teach them how to code, you know what I'm saying? Send them to a STEAM school. Like autistic kids are smarter. I don't know why that's such negative about autistic autism. Exactly. Look how you starved, Taylor. Let's go to something. What else? That's not even look. That's not even shade to me. I might be a little autistic. That's fine because I'm creative as Fuck. So it don't really fucking matter.
Andrew Schultz
Exactly. It's beautiful. There's nothing wrong with and it's beautiful.
Charlamagne Tha God
What else we got, man? Oh, go to. Yo, go to the mayor. Punch me in the face. Yeah, that was great. Eric Adams was on a flight, and Eric Adams was coming off a flight. This gotta suck. Yo, they don't. Before we play this clip, they're really. You know how people leave prison and then they just put them out into the world? And we always say, like, they need therapy or they need to be in, like, some type of a halfway house before they just get put out in the population. It should be the same thing for elected officials, really. Especially when they only do one term. When was Eric Adams ever out of the public space? He lived in the public. Yeah, but it's different. You ain't got your security detail no more with you. People can approach you like this. Let's press play. Taylor.
Andrew Schultz
Please punch me in the face. I went.
Charlamagne Tha God
If you punched me in the face. Okay, you can get. All right.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Those things are over.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Good.
Andrew Schultz
Thank God.
Charlamagne Tha God
Damn.
Andrew Schultz
Face everywhere.
Charlamagne Tha God
Damn. That's nice. Boy, they just chew you up and spit you out, man. You was the mayor of New York City for four years. Now you just on a plane. Regular people can just walk up to you, talk crazy to you. That's not right.
Andrew Schultz
Yo.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's actually a problem waiting to happen. Happen for an elected official. That's not right.
Andrew Schultz
He caused that.
Charlamagne Tha God
How?
Andrew Schultz
With, like, his scandals and stuff that he had.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's not true, though, because of what Chris was even saying earlier. It's like, there's always going to be half of the country that don't like you, even if you tried to do the right thing. And I'm not saying that's Mayor Adams. I'm just saying, like. Like, think of any elected. If you think of. Man, think of what Kamala Harris probably got to deal with. You know what I'm saying? They took the Secret Service from her. So she's just out here. I mean, she got her security detail. Detail. But just imagine what she has to deal with.
Andrew Schultz
They took the Secret Service from her. Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Trump took her Secret Service. I didn't know that.
Andrew Schultz
That's.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yes, you did. I.
Andrew Schultz
That's.
Charlamagne Tha God
You took it right before her last book tour.
Andrew Schultz
She was the vice president, but she's the vice president of the United States of America, dude. Like, you don't put someone in that position with that type of power and then immediately remove their protection in this climate especially, you always have it for the rest of their lives.
Charlamagne Tha God
No, they changed it. I don't know how long it is. I know for presidents it's definitely longer. But I think if I'm not mistaken, Joe Biden extended hers because of the political climate. Am I tripping? All I know is Trump got rid of it right before her book tour, you know what I'm saying? But just imagine what she has to deal with just walking through an airport like, eh, I don't like it. Regardless of how I feel about elected fitness, I don't like it. Cause this is just a problem waiting to happen, you know, I'm surprised he don't have a buffer though. At least have one security guard. Why he just walking around like a club promoter?
Andrew Schultz
I'm curious what she's upset at him about.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, why she didn't put specific policy?
Andrew Schultz
Or is it the corruption that she's upset about?
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh no, it's a good question. That's a good question.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
What else we got? You want to pay some bills and then do some action? Idiots. Bills.
Andrew Schultz
Let's do it. Let's talk to the people.
Charlamagne Tha God
Let's pay some bills and do some asking. Idiots.
Andrew Schultz
Man. Man.
Charlamagne Tha God
Hey yo. Salute to Tempo. Thank you Tempo for sponsoring the billion idiots. I'm trying to start the year strong, but long days make healthy choices harder. Tempo gives me nutrient packed meals that are already cooked and ready in minutes. Perfect for when I need real fuel. Fast. All right. Tempo delivers fresh chef crafted dietitian approved meals right to your door. Each meal is perfectly portioned for lunch and dinner and ready in just two minutes. That means real food, real fast without the sad desk lunch or drive through regret with 20 new recipes every week. Made from nutrient rich ingredients, Tempo keeps things exciting and helps you stay consistent with healthy habits. Even busy athletes like Maria Sharapova swear by Tempo for balanced meals that help them stay on top of their wellness goals. And no matter your goals, there's a Tempo meal for you. Protein packed meals with up to 30 grams of protein. Calorie conscious, even GLP1 balanced meals is convenient but also flexible enough to fit the way you want to eat. For a limited time, Tempo is offering our listeners 60% off your first box. Box go to Tempo meals.comidiots that's Tempo meals.comidiots for 60% off your first box. Tempo meals.comidiots rules and restrictions may apply. This episode is brought to you by Dead Man's Wire, the new film from roquet entertainment. Dead Man's Wire is the incredible true story of the 1977 kidnapping that turned an aspiring entrepreneur into an outlaw folk hero. Directed by legendary filmmaker Gus Van Santa. Dead Man's Wire stars Bill Skarsgrd, Dacre Montgomery, Cary Elways and Maihala. With Colman Domingo and Al Pacino. Now playing in select theaters everywhere. January 16th. Let's do some Ask an Idiot Taylor gang. And yes, I will be in Vegas to go watch Mary J. Blige's residency. Are you fucking kidding me? I miss Young Jeezy in Vegas, but I will not miss Mary J. Blige. Shout out.
Andrew Schultz
Meryl Mero.
Charlamagne Tha God
Man.
Andrew Schultz
New morning host.
Charlamagne Tha God
The Hot 97 salute to my guy. Mero man. I hit Meryl. I mean, I hit Meryl. I talked to Merrill every now and then. That's my guy. You know, we all started. Well, we were already at MTV too.
Andrew Schultz
And they started, I think, working on your D. Cinemaro.
Charlamagne Tha God
Started working on DJ Samaro. Got bought in during our whole MTV2 tenure. And it, you know, it's one of those things. And they used to do this to all the OG talent. They would ask us about new and upcoming talents, you know, like, oh yeah, I didn't know who they were, but I was like, oh yeah, I fuck with them once I saw their content and stuff like that. So they bought them in MTV2 didn't really have anything for them to do. Like MTV2 has some fire ass talent. Yeah, like, and I'm talking about after the guy code, Girl code, that era, the cold era. The cold era is what set off all of that new original program. But they were bringing in new talent and didn't really know what to do with them because, you know, we were still cooking. And so when I started Uncommon Sense. Yeah, Deezy Romero had a segment on my show called Classic or Trash every week.
Andrew Schultz
That's right.
Charlamagne Tha God
So I think that's the first time they were ever on tv, if I'm not mistaken. Yeah. So at that time it was Desus Merrill and Zuri Hall. MTV did not know what to do with him. MTV2 did not know what to do. And so, so Zuri was my co host for uncommon sense and DiMero was on every episode. And Zuri did like the pilot and did one episode and she left and went to Entertainment Tonight.
Andrew Schultz
Et.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah. And then, yeah, D's Zuri Halson, the good sister. Zuri Harden. Yeah, Deezer Mero started at Vice, then they went to Showtime and then, you know, things didn't work out between them. And you know, Merrill, Merrill been cooking shit. Merrill was at 7pm in Brooklyn, Mello with Melo and Kaz. And think Monica McGill is on there sometime. And now he's got mourners on Hot 97 Bravo. I think it's great.
Andrew Schultz
I think it's cool.
Charlamagne Tha God
I always felt like they should have been on radio, like, especially when they were the bodega boys. Can you imagine the bodega boys, Desus and Mero on the radio? You know what I'm saying? I would have gave them afternoon afternoons, though, but I would have gave them.
Andrew Schultz
Afternoons, like driving home or.
Charlamagne Tha God
Driving home. Yeah, yeah. Like, Diaz and Merrill would have been on the afternoon bodega boys in New York City. Like, oh, come on. But Meryl Merrill. Merrill should do well, man. Salute to my guy. Merrill. Mike Mason, three says, oh. Oh, this is a good one. Go back. Go to that one. Andre the outlaw says, welcome back. Schultz. How did you come up with the name Lincoln?
Andrew Schultz
Lincoln is my brother's middle name, and it's actually my wife's grandma's middle name as well.
Charlamagne Tha God
Really?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah. My dad named my brother after Abraham Lincoln, obviously, and we like that. And then Lawrence is obviously my dad's name. That's his middle name. Lincoln Lawrence Schultz.
Charlamagne Tha God
L.L. schultz.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Ladies loves Schultz.
Andrew Schultz
I love Schultzie.
Charlamagne Tha God
Go to that first one. I like this first one, too. Right here. This is a good one. No, that one. What's the other one? No, go. Scroll up. Scroll up. What's better? Undead Assad says, what's better? A witty response or a quick response? A quick, witty response.
Andrew Schultz
Those are the best.
Charlamagne Tha God
Those are the fucking. Those are the greatest. A quick, witty response. That's why I love funny people, man. It's like, how the fuck you come up with that shit so quick, man?
Andrew Schultz
It feels real. It's in the moment, you know? It's not performative.
Charlamagne Tha God
It's not performative, man.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Classic Grant says, could either of you eat a human if it came down to it?
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
I got news for you. Classic Grant. What you think beyond beef is? What you think impossible meat is?
Andrew Schultz
I don't need. I don't. I don't need any of that. I'm not doing it on, like, because I want to. I'm doing it out of, like, survival.
Charlamagne Tha God
Bro, we definitely done ate some human, bro.
Andrew Schultz
Not. Stop it.
Charlamagne Tha God
Bro, we definitely done ate some human. You know?
Andrew Schultz
How?
Charlamagne Tha God
How? You know, I saw a clip like that. I don't know. They said it somewhere. Nah, we definitely done ate some human. Come on, man. All of these bodies, bro. People dying. Like, come on, bro. We definitely done at some human. There was a gate show at some of these Restaurants, I think beyond meat. What the fuck? Beyond meat? Impossible meat. They say it's plant based. Cause it's just fucking dead vegans. Shut up.
Andrew Schultz
Yo, this might be. It's. When did it get most popular? During COVID Maybe. They used all those bodies.
Charlamagne Tha God
See what I'm saying?
Andrew Schultz
They got all those bodies. They were sneaking them out the hospital. Remember when they had those trucks dragging them out the hospital?
Charlamagne Tha God
And they got regular impossible and they got beyond, but then they got the plant based beyond. The plant based beyond is the carcasses of vegans and the regular impossible, and the beyond is just, you know, bodies.
Andrew Schultz
I mean, what is a vegan. It's plant based meat.
Charlamagne Tha God
You see what I'm saying?
Andrew Schultz
That's a great point.
Charlamagne Tha God
You see what I'm saying?
Andrew Schultz
Next question.
Charlamagne Tha God
You ever had some beyond veal? This is the idiots. You ever had some beyond fucking veal? You know what that is? Babies.
Andrew Schultz
Yo, just go. I knew. Hey, that's $200 million talking right now. He's invited, bro. He's in the Illuminati. He's eating the baby blood. The babies.
Charlamagne Tha God
I'm not gonna front. That's another thing that's so stupid to me, yo. I. I've seen a lot of coping going on, bro. Like, you know, some of y' all just really, you know, y'. All. Y' all sound comforting. The losers talk to me. No, I'm just saying, when people be like, oh, he's in the Illuminati, or, you know, you gotta suck dick to get a Netflix deal or this and that, it's like, yo, you sound comforting to losers. Didn't you say that you're making an announcement about entering the Illuminati? Oh, God, Taylor, you've been around me all of these years and you don't understand how I entertain yet. Yeah, but I thought you were gonna actually make the announcement. Yes, that's why I was scared. You think I didn't know what the fuck I was doing? Yeah. You think this just happened? You think I just did this in the last month? Like, no, no. You know what I'm saying? Motherfuckers is crazy. Motherfuckers is really crazy. They're crazy when they be like, he all of a sudden been doing radio for 28 fucking years. I've been at Breakfast Club for 15, okay?
Andrew Schultz
They'll learn one day.
Charlamagne Tha God
I did an interview with Axios where a real journalist who actually does real research asked me what I was going to do because my deal was up. I said, how do you know that she Said because you signed back in September of 2020 and it was a five year deal. That's just common sense for anybody who chooses to use it. You know what I'm saying? That's just common sense for anybody who chooses to use it, you know, and reads just a little bit. Just a little bit. But no, some of y' all do real, really sound comforting to losers. And the only thing I would say to any of y', all, man, is you do realize you paint yourself in a corner because whenever you do achieve anything, right? Any, any type of level of success, you've put yourself in a corner because you told everybody the only way to achieve that is to suck.
Andrew Schultz
So you must have sucked.
Charlamagne Tha God
You must have fucking sucked. You gotta, you told people the only way to achieve that was to be in the Illuminati. So it's nefarious means when anybody else does it. But it's when you do it, it's talent when you do it, talent. Like, listen, but let's be honest.
Andrew Schultz
Most people would suck for 200.
Charlamagne Tha God
Nah, for 200.
Andrew Schultz
200. Most people suck.
Charlamagne Tha God
So why is it in this economy, by the way? I don't know what you're talking about with that number. But why isn't it more people getting that type of deal if it's so easy to get by just giving some head?
Andrew Schultz
No, because it's not that many people who want to get sucked for 200.
Charlamagne Tha God
Ooh, that's a good point.
Andrew Schultz
Like, 200 million for a blowjob is a horrible.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's crazy. How much money are you making if you can just give up 200 for a dick suck?
Andrew Schultz
It's only Bezos could do that.
Charlamagne Tha God
Damn.
Andrew Schultz
It's really only Bezos. And I don't think he wants you to suck his dick, right? Like, is Bill Clinton or not Bill Clinton? And yeah, Bill don't got it. It's Bezos, It's. Who's the other guy? Bill Gates.
Charlamagne Tha God
It is funny, though. But it is funny, though, because I watch a lot of people who, you know, used to get deals like that, right? Used to get deals in corporate America. And it's just like, so it was cool when you was doing it, but then when everybody else after you was doing it, they did it by some nefarious mean. But it's really cool. Crazy.
Andrew Schultz
Don't. I mean, people believe what makes them feel good, man, I see a lot. Isn't that what Drew's sketch is about?
Charlamagne Tha God
Yes, yes, it is. Yes, it is. I, I, I like it though. I like, I like I like those of you who sound comforting to losers. And if you hear certain things from certain people and certain people say, you know, that you can only achieve certain things through nefarious means or gay means. If you need that kind of comfort because you're a loser and you don't believe in God and you don't believe you have a talent and you don't believe in hard work. I don't know what to tell you, brother. Our sister. I don't know what to tell you.
Andrew Schultz
Amen.
Charlamagne Tha God
Go eat a Beyond burger that's made of dick meat. What else we got, Taylor? Let's do a couple more. Are you looking forward to J. Cole's new album? Iowadon? I don't know. Looking forward. I'm gonna listen to it. I'm gonna definitely check it out. I don't know if I'm looking forward to it. Are you looking forward to it, Alex? Not really.
Andrew Schultz
But I'm not really looking forward to.
Charlamagne Tha God
Any music right now.
Andrew Schultz
Isn't that interesting?
Charlamagne Tha God
Depressed?
Andrew Schultz
No, just what's going on. Music doesn't feel like it's driving culture. Yeah, yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Like I love music. I love hip hop. Music is only. I hear what you're saying now, Alex.
Andrew Schultz
It just doesn't feel like we had Drake and Kendrick that like encapsulated what felt like a year year. And then now, ever since then, it just hasn't really felt like another story has been.
Charlamagne Tha God
I haven't heard anything that's like, you ain't listening, bro. There's some great salute to my guy Reuben Vincent from Charlotte, North Carolina. Phenomenal. He got a dope project out with 9th Wonder. Salute to Kai Cash from New York City. He signed the DJ Drama. And what's the name of Drama's joint? What's the name of the generation now, you know what I'm saying? Salute to Nico Brim. Salute to Marco Motherfucking plus from Atlanta, Georgia. Marco is so goddamn phenomenal. Oh my God. Salute to Chris Patrick from New Jersey. Salute to Fergie, baby. There's some dope salute to win. You seen the white girl win that? Be running around with Rob Markman. Oh, my God. Her and Kai got a joint right now that's dope. Them young kids, it's some really good dope ass young rappers out there. I was thinking about this over the holidays. I'm like, yo, if I was Drake, if I was Kendrick, if I was Cole, they all got labels.
Andrew Schultz
Why aren't they scooping them up?
Charlamagne Tha God
Scooping up that whole new wave like them people. I just Named are some phenomenal ass artists. Like, everything you love about hip hop, everything you say you like about hip hop, the top tier lyricism, people that actually care about bar them. People I named are really, really doing it. Like, those are some dope ass rappers. So I'm gonna take Koza, og He's a veteran. You know, I'm sure there was a rumor that Jay Z might be back in the studio. So if that happens, I'm always check for hov.
Andrew Schultz
Come on.
Charlamagne Tha God
That's my era. I'm always check for hov. Like, I'm gonna listen to Cole as well. I just. My thing with Cole is I. I don't know what the approach is gonna be.
Andrew Schultz
Be.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah, because, you know, the last few years leading up to the battle, Cole was saying, I'm the best. He was the guy. I'm the best. You know, I'm. I'm numero uno. I'm Muhammad Ali, this shit. He's still going to say that. Yeah. But then when he had the opportunity to prove it with the other two greats of a generation, he chose to back out. And. And if I'm being honest, the offer. I'm always being honest. But the offering that he did contribute to the diss war was like, eh. No. When he went at Kendrick, you didn't even believe that. Like, you didn't believe that. You know, Kendrick catalog is phenomenal. Like, eh. And so when he backed out, cool. I respect him. I appreciate it, you know, if you did what your spirit told you to do. But what's the album gonna be about if you not trying to be number one? You understand what I'm saying? Like, I don't. He kind of addressed. I forgot what Sanga was where he was saying basically that it would have been a fallout with his. With his friend talking about Kendrick. You're gonna do a whole album. It's gonna be lemonade. You want the whole album about a fallout? I know. I'm not saying that, but I think he's gonna. I think he's gonna address it again, though. I don't want to hear that. I don't. I'm saying. But like I said, I'm gonna listen to it. You know, it's not like Cole doesn't rap. He rap his ass off. We know that. Like, you know, so I'm definitely gonna check it out. Let's do two more, man. Tequila, papi. He said, why y' all so sassy?
Andrew Schultz
Damn, man, Let us sass.
Charlamagne Tha God
We can't be sassy.
Andrew Schultz
Can't get some Sass on.
Charlamagne Tha God
You don't like a sassy ass man, bro.
Andrew Schultz
Nothing wrong with that.
Charlamagne Tha God
Are we sassy, though?
Andrew Schultz
Yes. What?
Charlamagne Tha God
What's the definition of sassy? You're sassy. I'm sassy. You think I'm sassy, Taylor?
Andrew Schultz
Am I sassy Taylor?
Charlamagne Tha God
I don't know what they. Let me see. What the definition of sassy. I don't know if you would be sassy.
Andrew Schultz
What am I?
Charlamagne Tha God
You're just a white man.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, that's nice.
Charlamagne Tha God
The definition of sassy is lively, bold and confident. You talking about an attitude of style, often playful or spirited. First of all, that's what the definition is. Often the definition and not what the culture says about sass. I don't give a fuck about culture. Y' all don't even know words. The fuck. I don't give a fuck about actual definition. I care about actual definitions of things cheeky are imputed in a way that's amusing rather than rude. A little attitude, not outright disrespect. What's wrong being sassy? It says sassy can be positive or mildly negative. It says sassy can be positive or mildly negative depending on context and delivery. I don't have a problem being fucking sassy. Yo, call me sassy. Sassy Davis, stop being sassy. One more mark. Ooh, this is a good one. 2006. What can be idiots fans expect from y'? All?
Andrew Schultz
What do you think, Charlotte? We got anything up our sleeve or.
Charlamagne Tha God
Definitely got things up. Merch is coming. The website's beginning.
Andrew Schultz
Oo.
Charlamagne Tha God
Merch is definitely coming. I. I think this is the year for a short film. I think this is the year for a brand that is short film. I do an animated short film because I feel like only animation can capture what it is we do here.
Andrew Schultz
I think we could do animation, but I also think live action is.
Charlamagne Tha God
I like live action. You know, if it's written the right way. The la. What's the last two great live action shows you seen like that did like the last two phenomenal live action shows you've seen. I got two.
Andrew Schultz
Comedy. Comedy or just anything comedy? Tv.
Charlamagne Tha God
Tv.
Andrew Schultz
I mean, Kirby enthusiasm is phenomenal.
Charlamagne Tha God
Kirby's always phenomenal. Kirby's always phenomenal. I like Dave, my little Dicky, of course, but boy, the studio with Seth Rogen.
Andrew Schultz
Oh, you liked it?
Charlamagne Tha God
Oh, you like it?
Andrew Schultz
Oh, interesting.
Charlamagne Tha God
That is hysteric. You didn't watch the studio?
Andrew Schultz
I watched it a little bit.
Charlamagne Tha God
Is hysterical. Cause I like things that exist in a real world.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
And it's kind of like the Evolution of Entourage.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah. Seth is just fucking incredible.
Charlamagne Tha God
Seth is fucking, fucking incredible. Especially on their first season.
Andrew Schultz
I'm surprised. I'm surprised you liked it because it's so inside with the acting world.
Charlamagne Tha God
I love it.
Andrew Schultz
But, like, you, as someone who's not, like, entrenched in the acting world, you still get all the things that they're talking about and.
Charlamagne Tha God
Because I feel like, outsider in it. But it's more from an executive perspective.
Andrew Schultz
Got it.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yeah.
Andrew Schultz
So you. It's more like on the agent side.
Charlamagne Tha God
Studio head. Yeah. Yeah. So it's more from an executive perspective. And you see how the executives be blowing smoke up people's ass, how none of them want to tell the truth. The episode when they finally cast for the Kool Aid man movie and they got Ice Cube playing the Kool Aid man, and it takes one woke in the room to be like, I think that might be racist. Yo, to have the Kool Aid man, that was. But everybody likes Kool Aid. We all drink Kool Aid. And then they go around the office and the other black people are telling them like that, no, I don't think that's racist at all. But then they decide to make the whole cast black. And then finally the person goes, okay, see, now that's racist. That shit is fucking funny. And then when they finally reveal it at the up front, it ain't even the backlash to the race that they get. It's for some. You gotta watch it, man. The shit is. Studio is fucking hysterical. That shit is good. If we. That's the pocket I like to be in. Because that's the type of tone of humor and shit that I like. Yeah, we doing shit like that. We doing shit like, Dave, we got something.
Andrew Schultz
Now we're talking.
Charlamagne Tha God
We got something. But, yeah, man, you can expect that. I mean, I don't know, man. What do you think a lot of these podcasts going to Netflix and shit? I don't know, but I don't think it's just gonna be Netflix. I think what people are missing about the Netflix thing is that it's gonna open it up because. Cause all of the screamers gonna want in, bro.
Andrew Schultz
Yes.
Charlamagne Tha God
It's not just gonna be Netflix.
Andrew Schultz
Yeah.
Charlamagne Tha God
Amazon's gonna make a play. Screaming services like Peacock might make a play. I don't know if Disney will ever get into it because it's Disney and, you know, the content that, you know, maybe Hulu. Maybe Hulu. Yeah. You know, like, so you just never know. I think that it's gonna open it up for all these screaming Platforms, man. And I mean, listen, I know a lot of y' all make a lot of great money on YouTube. Salute to YouTube. YouTube is always gonna be great for discoverability. YouTube is always gon promotion and marketing as long as they're not suppressing, you know, your content. But it's good to have other options.
Andrew Schultz
Options get you more money.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yes.
Andrew Schultz
You want people to be able to compete for you. Yes, competition is good.
Charlamagne Tha God
Yes.
Andrew Schultz
So we love that.
Charlamagne Tha God
So, yeah, I mean, that's what I'm looking forward to. I'm looking forward to that. I'm looking forward to bringing. It is just continuing to grow in 2026, but I'm looking forward to watching how the podcast industry continues to grow in 2026. Because there's not just one way. There used to be a pipeline, right? It used to be start your podcast, use social media to promote it, put it on YouTube. And that's where it stopped. And then, you know, things like Patreon came around, so now people were able to have subscriptions. It's just good that people are looking at podcast creators in that way as being full fledged shows that they want to partner with, you know, so it's not just going to be Netflix. It's going to be a lot of different platforms that come and it's gonna be a lot of people doing great licensing deals. And please, that's another thing. Stop saying that people are selling their video rights. You're only selling your video rights if you choose to sell your video rights. All of these deals I'm seeing are licensing deals. They're licensing deals to platforms like Netflix. I don't care if It's Barstool, Spotify, iHeart. People are doing licensing deals.
Andrew Schultz
I mean, you're licensing your company content to YouTube when you put it on and then they sell ads on it.
Charlamagne Tha God
And you don't even read and you don't even read the motherfucking terms and conditions. Ain't none of y' all ever read the terms and conditions of motherfucking YouTube. You just put it up and click and just throw it up there. You don't know what the fuck you done gave away. Yeah, YouTube might around. And I shouldn't even say this. Never mind. I'll tell you off here. I don't even want to. I don't even want to give nobody on YouTube any ideas. As always, if you listen to this podcast, you think we're smart, you think we're intelligent, you think we're brilliant. You're absolutely right. Right. Whatever. You listen to this podcast I think we're just a couple idiots who don't know shit. You're right, too. It's the Brilliant Idiot Podcast. Thank you for listening. Peace.
In this week’s episode, Charlamagne Tha God and Andrew Schulz are joined by their regular crew for a raucous, candid, and often hysterical take on the week’s big news, personal milestones, media drama, comedy’s role in politics, and more. There are major celebratory moments, reflections on parenthood and the pressures of public success, honest takes on controversy, and their trademark blend of insightful banter and puerile humor. True to the “Brilliant Idiots” mission, the hosts oscillate between sharp social commentary and wild, irreverent tangents—including the titular “paranormal permeation” discussion about ghostly sexual experiences.
Taylor Gets Engaged (02:07-03:30)
Andrew Schulz Welcomes New Baby Boy (03:31-04:39)
Addressing the Contract Rumors (09:52-14:32)
Media Narratives and Conflation (12:13-13:48)
Should Comedians Be Offensive? (21:13-25:55)
The Blending of Entertainment and Politics (25:55-31:17)
Political Memories & Media Accountability (39:42-47:41)
Social Media and Anxiety (44:49-45:38)
Dreams, Wet Beds, and Ghostly Sex (68:06-72:59)
Drewski’s Mega Church Sketch & Comedy’s Boundaries (51:43-58:46)
Micro Penis & Barbie Diversity (74:09-80:53)
Ex-Mayor Adams Confrontation (82:01-83:53)
As always, the show’s tone is candid, brash, and deeply irreverent—oscillating between sharp social analysis and wild comedic digressions. The hosts are unafraid to confront rumors, push the limits of humor, and flout the boundaries of "good taste," all while retaining camaraderie and genuine curiosity.
In sum: Another wild, insightful, and entertaining installment of “The Brilliant Idiots,” packed with irreverent humor, reflections on fame, family, and media, and a fearless approach to controversy—epitomizing that line between brilliance and idiocy.