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Foreign nation headquarters in Los Angeles, California. This is the Broski Report with your host, Brittany Broski, the Altogether Cookie, the added Family. Gomez. Gomesh. Guys, is it giving transunkle Fester still? I don't. Is it giving trunkle Fester? Guys, be serious. Gomez, Debbie, with all my soul. Nobody. Can we hear some fucking chatter for Uncle Fester? Okay, guys, Happy Halloween. Pumpkin, pumpkin, Pumpkin. Dumb. A pumpkin. Okay, guys, Happy freaking Halloween. It's the day, it's the time, it's the year. It's the most wonderful time of the year. There'll be much whistle blowing, and I don't really know the words to that song. Okay. And I texted a picture of myself to Drew, and she said I look like Nosferatu. Fuck you, bitch. Fuck you, bitch. I'm Fester Adams. Ho. Okay, so let's have the docket for today. First of all, I need to tell everyone Uncle Fester is on his period. Uncle Fester's on his period. And that just needs to be said because there's a lot of things going on in my brain right now. And maybe I don't know how to put on a bald cap and let my ears out. Cause I'm kind of deaf in both ears right now. I'm kind of. You should have. First of all, I did my own glam. Thank you. I did my own glam. Stop. Yes. And was I in the mirror for about 20 minutes practicing uncle Fester faces? Yeah, I was. Okay, guys, for the audio listeners, unfortunately, this is kind of a visual one. This is a visual one. Okay? We all know that. I freaking love Halloween, okay? Millennial moment. Sometimes you got to tap into that. You got to tap into the millennial cringe to be free. And I'm not even millennial. And Don't. Don't. I don't want to hear it. I'm not even a millennial. But sometimes you got to tap into. I freaking love bats. Moms love that video, by the way. Moms friggin love that video. Friggin. Bring back friggin. I'm trying to bring back fierce, and I'm trying to bring back friggin. That is totally frigging fierce. Okay, guys, we're gonna deep dive into kind of the backstory of Halloween here today, because Halloween, guess what? Irish holiday. Hate to tell you guys, I hate to report it. I know every country, every culture kind of has their version of Halloween, but Irish Halloween. Okay, here's the deal. I kind of want to tell you guys what I. My family did growing up for Halloween. And some hot takes that I have on Halloween because there is a best type of candy. There is a worst type of house to go to to trick or treat. And I also think we discussed this on Drew and Caleb's. On Caleb's podcast. And me and Drew went on. Can I speak? Can I speak? I think that there is an age that you kind of graduate out of trick or treating. Unfortunately. However. However, look at me. If I showed up. If I showed up on your doorstep, you're telling me you wouldn't give me candy? If I said, go mesh like this. And then I had a pillowcase and I was like, Excuse me, Ms. Gomez. Happy Halloween. And I. And I did this. Actually, they might call the cops because I'm looking at myself in the viewfinder and I'm like, oh, wow. Wow. When I was a kid, we used to do. We either. Some years would go full, like, balls to the wall Halloween where we would do like, fog machine. I would scare my. I would scare the kids that came up to the door. Because that's a simple pleasure in life. Okay? I had this friend in high school named Kaylee who used to do like, special effects makeup. That was her special interest. She used to do like, gory, nasty special effects makeup. And she used to post it on Tumblr and Instagram and shit like that. And so she would do these crazy, like, look like she got hit in the head with an ax, like flesh flaying off the bone. And we. I would just wear a cape, okay? Because sometimes a cape is the scariest thing of all. A grown woman in a cape. Actually, I was 15 and my dad would be at the door with the fog machine going, you know, happy Halloween, kid. And that's already scary enough, right? Like, you've got five, six, seven year old kids coming up to the door. Fog machine. We've got scary Halloween music playing. We've got. We would do the fake cobwebs everywhere and the like, shit in the yard. Then you've got double whammy. Me and my friend Kaylee, two mentally ill teenagers rushing these kids, okay? So they come happy hour army and Kayla would do, help me, she's gonna kill me. We'd do that. And then the kids would run away crying. And there is such an innate joy in causing that, in being the cause of that. We would do that one year for Halloween. I was a red M and M because the costume was plus size friendly. One year I was. Well, I was Kylo Ren two years ago. I like a costume that is easily recognizable And I say that dressed as Uncle Fester, okay? Because I. I figured bitches know Uncle Fester. The bitches go crazy for Uncle Fester. Yeah, Halloween in my family is fun. It's definitely. My Nana dresses up like a witch. She paints her face green and like, does her witch cackle. And she scares away the kids. Because it's a test of honor, okay? It's a test of courage and honor. If you can come to the door, and if my Nana's doing, can you come get a candy? Because if you can, you've earned that candy, okay? And if you can't, then get. Get the fuck off my porch. Sometimes I wonder why am I like this? And I'm like, that's my Nana. She made me. She kind of. It's genetic. Whatever's wrong with me right now here that you can see kind of visually, my Nana gave it to me, so. Okay, let's deep dive into the history of Halloween. Halloween, because what is trick or treat? That's kind of a fucked up concept. Trick or treat origin. The creepy in the cookie. Okay. Trick or treating. Traditional Halloween custom for children and adults in some countries. October 31st. Yes, people dress in costumes and you get a trick. Or do you get a treat? Confectionary, candy, sweets. Although in some cultures, money is given instead. The trick refers to a threat, usually idle, to perform mischief on the residents or their property. If no treat is given, we need to bring back tricks on Halloween. Way too many treats. I'm tired of seeing treats. I'm tired of the gluten free, sugar free carbless, like high protein Halloween treat. Okay? What I want to see is more tricks. Trick or treat. And then you got to start dancing trick. Okay. And then I do a head spin trick. Armed robbery. Trick or treat. Trick arson. I throw a Molotov cocktail through your window and I run away. And it's like, who did it? I don't know. It was a little girl. Maybe it was a little boy, I don't know. Dressed as Uncle Fester. Actually, they weren't that little. They were kind of mid sized plus size. And they were about five foot nine. Grown ass man. Uncle Fester, we need to bring back tricks. What were what tricks for? Trick or treat. Oh, this is just stupid as fuck. This is actually going to piss me off. Our son's trick is a big scary smile trick, pull my finger. Okay, that's funny. Trick or treat. Trick, pull my finger. And then I shit myself. And then I load my adult underwear with human diarrhea. My son loves his treats. So always willing to perform a trick or tell a joke. He loves the fake eyeball. Lollies to pretend his eye fell out. Motherfucker. This website's from Australia, not a real place. Best tricks for trick or treat. Okay, here we go. Reddit. R slash, Halloween. Someone said I would not do this. Do you want your house TP'd or egged? Because this is how you get your house TP'd or egged. Okay? Bring back. Egging people's houses. Bring back. Do it. I got TP'd once, actually, in high school, and I got in trouble. I didn't do it. Someone TP our house. And my parents. I was in trouble with my parents. What the fuck? I don't know who did it. The history of trick or treating traces back to Scotland and Ireland, where the tradition of guising geezing goes back. Going house to. House below, below, below. Casare mini boss. Going house to. And why do the Minions speak Spanish? Why is Minionese like an offshoot of Spanish? Have I. Have we Googled this before on this podcast? Why are the Minions Latinx? Why are the Minions Latinx? Who made that creative decision? You know what I mean? How like an avatar way of water, like, all. It's just like ripping it from island cultures. Hey, these are fake people. We can't come up with, like, a fake. Why are we steal. Why are we. Why are the Minions Latinks? I digress. Going house to house at Halloween and putting on a small performance to be rewarded with food or treats. Now, I like that. Okay, you want a Snickers dance? Put on a show. I want to see choreography. I want to see you guys work for this fucking treat. Because that's the thing with kids these days. Entitled. Entitled. They can't read. They can't write cursive. All they know is be on their phone, have adhd, watch Cocomelon. Okay? And probably I. I am an enjoyer of all three of those things as well. However, if you want some snacks or treats for me, I'm gonna need to see some dancing. I'm gonna need to see some form of entertainment that you're gonna put on for me while I sit in the threshold of my doorstep and I can hand out this Walmart candy, okay? I don't even do that, though. I can't. Cause then people would be like, I know where she lives, okay? And she was dressed as Uncle Fester. And she wasn't wearing pants. And she wasn't wearing pants because guess what? I'm not. She was dressed as Uncle Fester, and she was tucked. Now what is there to talk? Not much. Okay. What is there to talk? I don't know. But she kept saying, I'm talked, I'm tucked. Do you guys tuck for Uncle Fester? Dragon Gomez. Okay, moving on. I love my job. Here's the thing about trick or treating. Here's what I want to do, okay? If I were ever to, like, be the house that kids come to, first of all, I'm dressing up scary as fuck. My house is going to be ominous when I have, like, okay, 10, 15 years from now, life's kind of settled down. I'm no longer like, hey, guys, what's up? Here's the butthole picture of the day. I'm. I'm going to be with my man, ideally Irish. We're sitting in chairs, in lounge chairs in the front of my house. It is, it is completely decorated like a haunted house. It is spooky as fuck. Okay? If you approach the doorstep, I'm dressed like Fester, my man is dressed like Debbie, okay? Because, yeah, you have to come up and I'm going to say you have to recite five facts about the global state of politics and economics right now. You have to give me the current GDP of your favorite country. Now, no Googling, no chat. GPT. I'm going to ask kids to popcorn read for their fucking treat. Go ahead and write your name in cursive for me and I'm going to grade it. And if it's good, I'll give you a treat. And if it's bad, I'm going to shoot you. If it's bad, I'm going to start. If it's bad, I'm. I'm going to call your parents and we're going to have a sit down discussion. You are going to be disciplined. It's not up to me. I'm not your parent. But you are going to be disciplined. IPad taken away. You know, no phone time for a week. I don't know what it is, okay? You can't see your e character, AI boyfriend. I don't give a fuck. You can't write your name in cursive. Trick. The history of trick or treating, like we said, goes back to Scotland and Ireland. Going house to house and putting on a small performance to be rewarded with food or treats goes back at least as far as the 16th century, as does the tradition of people wearing costumes at Halloween. And I'm sure you guys have seen those scary as fuck pictures of like Halloween costumes from the 1930s. And it's like human flesh masks. I don't know. No. Or like Mickey mouse convention from 1941. And it's just like the scariest, most terrifying cult masks you've ever seen. There are many accounts from 19th century Scotland and Ireland of people going house to house in costume at Halloween, reciting verses in exchange for food. Go ahead and recite me seven Seamus Haney poems. Right now. I need you to repeat the Gettysburg address. Starting in 3, 2, 1. Reciting verses in exchange for food, and sometimes warning of misfortune if they were not welcomed. In North America, the earliest known occurrence of geese geezing is from 1898, when children were recorded as having done this in the province of British Columbia, Canada. The interjection trick or treat was then first recorded in the Canadian province of Ontario in 1917. Wow. The Canadians are the spooky ones. What is the. What is the link between Canada and Halloween? Do you guys love it up there? What are you guys doing up there? Is. Is anyone monitoring Canada? We need to leave you guys with, like, a guardian. I don't really know what the Canadians are up to. There's a lot going on down here, south of the border, meaning America. So just. Can someone check on the Canadians? While going house to house in costume has long been popular among the Scots and Irish, it is only in the 2000s that saying trick or treat has become common in Scotland and ire. Prior to this, children in Ireland would commonly say, help to Halloween party at the doors of homeowners. What does that mean? Up to Halloween party? I'm working on the Irish accent. It's still. It's not where it needs to be. I'm not proud of it. I'm gonna keep doing it, don't get me wrong, but it's not great. Okay. Op your fucking Halloween costume. That's class grand. Very good, very good, very good. The activity is prevalent in the anglospheric countries. Great word. Of the United Kingdom, Ireland, the United States and Canada. It also has extended into Mexico. In northwestern and central Mexico, the practice is called calaverita. Calaverita. Spanish diminutive for calavera, skull. And instead of trick or treat, the children ask me, calaverita, can you give me my little skull? That is so cute. Where a carabarita is a small skull made of sugar or chocolate. Now, see, I like that because kids, they're polite with it. They come to the door, can I have this? Can you give this to me? And then, of course, the answer is yes. I'm not going to make you dance for it because you asked nice. But this bull, this trick or treat bullshit. Start dancing. Start dancing. Now. Recite me a poem. Recite me a scene from a play. I want to see you dance. I want to see a talent show. I want to. Want to see a special hidden talent. Okay, even do that where you, like. Remember those kids in middle school would, like, flip their eyelids upside down? You'd have to, like. And we'd all e. Do it again. You remember those kids who used to shoot milk out of their eyes? Was that just like. That is such a public school thing. Okay? I don't know if. If the little kids who were going to like, Catholic school and all that, they weren't in the public lunchroom with the government funded lunch meals shooting milk out of their eye sockets. I don't know if that was happening. That was reserved exclusively for the public. Public school kids. And I'm happy. I'm very grateful. I went to public school because it made me who I am. It made me funny, I think, and it made me very aware. Private school. Who the fuck knows what's going on over there? You guys, seriously, get your head out of your ass and start shooting milk out of your eye. Or do find something weird to do with your body, and you need to start doing it, okay? Because that's how you get attention and it's how you get social points, okay? You need to be the kid that's doing weird things with their body. You need to be the kid that is a little bit off the beaten path because even if you're weird, you're still famous. And that's important. That's important in the social hierarchy of. Of elementary, middle school and high school is you need to be. Oh, yeah, that's Jason. He's cool. He just shoots milk out of his eye. Oh, I went to high school with that kid. Yeah, he used to shoot milk out of his eye. See, you're immortalized. Just giving you guys advice. The custom of trick or treating on Halloween may come from the belief that supernatural beings or the souls of the dead roamed the earth at this time and needed to be appeased. All right, I like that. Okay, you're dancing for the ghosts. You're reciting scenes from normal people for the ghosts. Entertain them. They're fucking dead. I know. They're bored. Give them something. They don't have Hulu. They don't have Disney. Show them what's going on. Among Celtic speaking peoples, it was seen as a liminal time. I like that word, liminal. When the spirits or fairies. The owshy. Did I say that right? Au a o s S I. But it's in Irish. It's in Celtic. Ouchy. And the souls of the dead came into our world and were appeased with offerings of food and drink. Now that's similar to El dia de muerte. El dia del muerto, where you leave out an offering. Similar beliefs and customs were found in other parts of Europe. It is suggested that trick or treating evolved from a tradition whereby people impersonated the spirits or the souls of the dead and received offerings on their behalf. Sv Petal suggests they personify the old spirits of the winter who demanded reward in exchange for good fortune. Impersonating these spirits or souls was also believed to protect oneself from them. I like that. And it's tried and true. Okay, Leave an offering as a. Please don't fuck with me, dude. Look, I gave you the, like, dried meat and fruit. Can you just please don't fuck with me? Life is hard enough. I don't need someone over my shoulder while I'm trying to watch Hulu being like, skip back 10 seconds. Or like, making it load like it's loading over and over constantly. Like, it's skipping. It's glitching. I'm just trying to watch my show and you're pissing me off. And it's because I didn't leave an offering. Okay, let's go back. What is the origin of jack o' lanterns? What is origin of pumpkin? Pumpkin, dumb. A pumpkin. Jack o' lantern. Who is Jack? Jack o' lantern? Wikipedia. A carved lantern most commonly made from a pumpkin or formerly a root vegetable, such as mangelwechel. Rutabaga. That's how you spell rutabaga. Rutabaga. These are like them shits from Harry Potter that scream, right? Rutabaga, or Swede is a root vegetable, a form of brassica napis, Swedish turnip and turnip. Oh, it's just a turnip. That usually refers to the related white turnip. Who gives a fuck, guys? Who fucking cares? I do want to know what a mangel wurtzel is? Mangold. Wurtzel. Mangold. Beet field, beet, fodder, beet. And root of scarcity is a cultivated root vegetable. Very interesting. It is suggested. Oh, here we go. Back to Ireland. Dude, I'm telling you, everything goes back to that fucking place. Everything. Its name comes from the phenomenon of strange lights flickering over peat bogs called jack o' lanterns, also known as will o' the wisps. It is suggested that the name also has ties to the Irish legend of Stingy Jack, a drunkard who bargains with Satan. Oh my God. I just got really excited. I just got really excited. I just got really excited at Stingy Jack. What the fuck? Wait, I just got really, really. Oh, Pumpkin. The Irish legend of Stingy Jack, a drunkard who bargains with Satan and is doomed to roam the earth with only a hollowed turnip to light his way. That's what I'm fucking talking about. And yeah, we're clicking on the Stingy Jack. Stingy Jack o', Lantern, also known as Jack the Smith, Drunk Jack, Flaky Jack, Jack o' Lantern, and Pumpkin. Jack. Pumpkin is a mythical character sometimes associated with All Hallows Eve while also acting as the mascot of the holiday. Several centuries ago in Ireland, there lived a drunkard known as Stingy Jack. He was known throughout the land as a deceiver or manipulator. He was a gaslighter male manipulator and he probably had a fucking mustache and wore diesel jeans. On a fateful night, Satan overheard the tale of Jack's evil deeds and silver tongue. Unconvinced and envious of the rumors, the devil went to find out for himself whether or not Jack lived up to his vile reputation. Typical of Jack, he was drunk and wandering through the countryside at night when he came upon a body on his cobblestone path. What? The body, with an eerie grimace on its face, turned out to be the devil himself. Jack realized this was his end. Satan had finally come to collect his malevolent soul. So Jack made a last request. He asked the devil to let him drink ale before he departed to hell. Period. One more Guinness for the soul, sir. Finding no reason not to acquiesce the request, Satan took Jack to the local pub and supplied him with many alcoholic beverages. Upon quenching his thirst, Jack asked Satan to pay the tab for the. Alex. Oh man, that was good. I think I left my wallet on that cross paths where I found your dead body. Yeah, no, no, I usually. No, it's right here. It's usually in my coat pocket. But you know, we kind of. I was so taken aback. You're the devil. You're the devil. And I think I dropped it. If you wouldn't mind. Catch. I know I'm about to die. Would you mind covering this tab? I mean, I got you for eternity in the afterlife, but would you just mind putting down that Amex? Thank you so much. Jack asked Satan to pay the tab for the ale. Much to his surprise, because he didn't carry any money. Jack convinced him to turn himself into a silver coin with which to pay the bartender and change back when he's not looking. Satan did. So impressed upon by Jack's unyielding nefarious tactics, shrewdly, Jack stuck the now transmogrified Satan coin into his pocket, which also contained a crucifix. What the hell's going on? Jack is a master male manipulator. How are you going to manipulate the devil? The crucifix's presence kept the devil debil. Kept the devil from escaping his form. This coerced Satan to agree to Jack's demand. In exchange for his freedom, he had to spare Jack's soul for 10 years. What the hell? Now you know if you make a bargain with the devil, you. You're losing. Okay, sure, you just earned 10 years. But what's 10 years to an eternity in hell? An eternity. And guess what? Now Satan's pissed cuz you got him. He got got you got, you got Satan. And now he's going to kill you forever. He's going to kill you every day, forever. Ten years after the day, there's this famous, not famous, there's this super funny line from spongebob. Maybe it was from spongebob that I still think about and it makes me laugh to this day where he says he'll kill you and then he'll go to work on you. Isn't that it? Maybe it's from the Squidward episode where he's in the Krabby Patty vault and he goes, it'll go straight to your thighs and then you'll blow up and the camera pans down to his big cellulite thighs. I love spongebob. Okay? Ten years after the date Jack originally struck his deal, he naturally found himself once again in the devil's presence. Jack happened upon Satan in the same setting as before. And he seemingly accepted it was his time to go to hell for good. As Satan prepared to take him to hell, Jack asked if he could have one apple to feed his starving belly. Foolishly, Satan once again again agreed to this request. Satan, let me tell you something, man. We know Jack's not trustworthy. We know he's not a good guy. Why are we acquiescing? You feel bad for him? He's a male manipulator, okay? He's gonna keep doing it to you and then he's gonna do it to your friend. And I'm. No, I'm coming to you as a girl, Satan. I'm coming to you as like, a friend. Like, I have no skin in this game. You are not the first person he's done this to, okay? And, like, I just want you to protect yourself. Like, he is a manipulator. He has this reputation. And like, I know you're giving him the benefit of the doubt, but, like, protect your peace. Protect your peace, okay? Because what? At first it was the drink and now it's the apple. Like, gluttony, Gluttony. Just kill him. Just kill him already. Okay? Kill him every day for the rest of forever. Foolishly, Satan once again again agreed to this request. As he climbed up the branches of a nearby apple tree, Jack surrounded its base with crucifixes. And you made Satan go get the damn apple for you, bro. Satan, frustrated at the fact that he had been entrapped again, demanded his release. As Jack did before he made a second demand that he will never take his soul to hell. Having no choice, the devil agreed and was set free. Eventually, the drinking took its toll on Jack and he died. Jack's soul prepared to enter heaven through the gates of St. Peter, but he was stopped. Jack was told by God that because of his sinful lifestyle of deceitfulness and drinking, he was not allowed into heaven. Jack then went down to the gates of hell and begged for admission into the underworld. Satan, fulfilling his obligation to Jack, could not take his soul. He gave Jack an ember to light his way. Now, why is Satan kinder than God? And we'll get to that in a sec. And we'll get to that after this commercial break. He gave Jack and ember delight his way. Jack is now doomed to roam the world between the planes of good and evil with only an ember inside a hollowed turnip. Turnip in this context, referring to a large rutabaga to light his way. So it's not even a pumpkin, it's a rutabaga. Wow, that's crazy. And who made this up? Very interesting. Very, very interesting. Okay, so that's why it's called a Jack O Lantern. Makes you think. Really fucking makes you think. This episode is sponsored by Cash App. I love to try and make my friends laugh with my message when I'm sending money on Cash App. Lately I've been doing thanks for the foot rub because it makes them look like a foot loving weirdo and that makes me laugh. You know what's even more fun and cool than that? One of the coolest things about Cash App is that you can design your own debit card. You can Pick from a bunch of different colors and patterns, add your favorite stamps, doodles, or even you and your friends inside jokes to make it totally unique to you. You also get exclusive savings on stuff you're already buying, like coffee, Boba, video games and more. 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Banking services provided by Cash App's Bank Partners Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton bank member FDIC. Discounts provided by Cash App, a blocking brand. Visit cashapp.com legal podcast for full disclosures. Jack O Lanterns Carved from Pumpkins Pumpkin are a yearly Halloween tradition that developed in the United States when Irish, Cornish, Scottish and other Celtic influenced immigrants brought their root vegetable carving traditions with them. It is common to see jack o' lanterns used as external and interior decorations prior to and on Halloween. To make a jack o' lantern, we know how to do that. It's usually a scary or funny face carved out of the rind. Now why is it called a will o' the wisp? Oh, that's scary. What the fuck is that? In folklore? Oh, now we're fucking getting into it, dude. In folklore, a will o' the wisp or Ignis fatus Foolish Flame in Latin is an atmospheric ghost light seen by travelers at night, especially over bogs, swamps or marshes. That's actually gonna be a firefly, son. Yeah, ain't no ghost. That's gonna be a firefly. They're bioluminescent. Yeah, they glow sometimes. They're endangered. They're endangered, man. Yeah, don't catch em. Don't put em in jars and shake em up. You'll kill em. You'll asphyxiate Em, you'll ass fix e ate them. Do not do it, okay? We don't have that many left. We don't have that many left, man. Please don't touch em. The phenomenon is known in the United Kingdom by a variety of names, including Jack o Lantern, Friar's Lantern, and Hinky Punk. Y' all really just say anything. Y' all say anything. And is said to mislead and or guide travelers by resembling a flickering lamp or lantern. Equivalents of the will o' the wisp appear in European folklore by various names. It's in French, German, Italian, Thailand. In North America, the phenomenon is known as the Paulding Light in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, the Spook Light in southern Missouri and northeastern Oklahoma, and the St. Louis light in Saskatchewan. In Arab folklore, it is known as Abu Fanus. In folklore, will of the wisps are typically attributed as ghosts, fairies or elemental spirits meant to reveal or conceal a path or direction. Ooh, you never know. These wisps are portrayed as dancing or flowing in a static form until noticed or followed, in which case they visually fade or disappear. Modern science explains the light aspect. Light aspect as natural phenomena such as bioluminescence and chemiluminescence caused by the oxidation of phosphine, dephosphan and methane produced by organic decay. Now, that is crazy. If we didn't have modern science, trust you me, believe you me, I would have been the biggest. Like, it's the science from the fairies. That's me. Now we have scientific explanations for this shit. And I'm like, no, it's the fairies. Yeah, Texting the fairies. And they're telling me to follow them. So I need to follow them down the road into the forest. And I need to meet the bog man. And stingy Jack is actually waiting for me. So I need to go talk to Jack. Guys, one moment. I need to go have a word with Jack. He kills me. The Will o' the Wisp and the Snake by Herman Hendrix. Look at this. They have arms. Dude, what? What the hell? Mexico has equivalents. Folklore explains the phenomenon to be witches who transformed into these lights. Another explanation refers to the lights as indicators to places where gold or hidden treasure are buried, which can be found only with the help of children. I don't like that. In this one, they are called luces del dinero Money lights or luces del tesoro Treasure lights. The swampy area of Massachusetts known as the Bridgewater Triangle has folklore of ghostly orbs of light. And there have been modern observations of these ghost lights in this area, as well as the feu follet of Louisiana, derives from the French. The legend says that the feu follet is a soul sent back from the dead to do God's penance, but instead attacks people for vengeance. That's not godly. Surely God's not sending down spirits to attack people. Ever feel like keeping up with Broski Nation news blasts takes more energy than you have? Mido Pure Go Gummies are here to help. These are the first ever gummies powered by Mitopure, Timeline's patented form of Urolithin A. They help renew your mitochondria, which are like the power plants of your cells. Two gummies give you 500 milligrams of mitopure, which is clinically proven to improve muscle strength and deliver sustained energy so you can feel like yourself again. Plus, they're vegan, gluten free, and made without artificial ingredients. Timeline is a science led brand backed by over 15 years of research and multiple human clinical trials. If you want to stay strong and energized now and as you age, then you have to try Mito Pure gummies. Timeline offers 20% off just for listeners of this show. Head to timeline.comido20 to get started. That's timeline.comido20. Your cells will thank you. Oh my God. I read this crazy. Actually, little mini break for book club. I started Perfume. You know that famous book perfume? It's like a murder story, dude. I. As a purveyor, as a, as a, a, an enjoyer of a fragrance, I love this fucking book. It also has just kept me like hooked. It's a short read. It's like 250 pages or something like that. About three fourths of the way through it. I'm gagged. I'm gagged. It's amazing. Yeah. Michael, get the book. Hold on. Stay right here. God damn it. Let me find it, okay? I was talking about God sending down spirits to hurt people, like the acts of vengeance, because that's what this thing said. And I'm reading perfume right now. Okay, Gag. And look at my little. My Paris bookmark. It's Paris because it's set in Paris. Or at least the first half is. He has this passage in here where he's kind of the main character Grenouille is discussing kind of in his head because he's crazy, okay? He's crazy. He's talking about how when you really think about the concept of God. Let me just do a little fucking disclaimer. Of course, if you are Religious. If you believe in God, power to you. Okay. This whole thing of like, I envy the faithful, sure, yes, whatever. It gives you a peace at night. The institution of religion I don't really respect as a man made thing, as a man made construct. We've been through it before. If you've listened to this podcast before, you know how I feel about religion. This, that being set aside like this is not to be offensive. This is more from like a philosophical standpoint, okay. If you think about God as a concept, not as something that is real, but something that we let govern our lives, our society, our rules, our feelings, our behavior, all of these things, our thought processes in here, this dude is like in his mind palace, okay? So he's in a deep state of reflection and of like self actualization and he is almost having like an egomaniac fit where he is realizing he is more powerful than God in the, the kind of dictionary definition of what God is and the role that it plays. And he says he's sitting in the church, okay? He's sitting in a church after everyone's left and he has a really distinct and savant level sense of smell. And he's sitting in this church and he can smell like the shitty incense. It's not even real incense. It's some substitute made of a blend of some fake something. He says he sat there for a while with an air of devout tranquility and took deep breaths, inhaling the incense laden air. And yet another cheerful grin crossed his face. How miserable this God smelled. How ridiculously bad the scent that this God let spill from him. It was not even genuine frankincense fuming up out of those thuribles. A bad substitute adulterated with linden and cinnamon dust and saltpeter. God stank. God was a poor little stinker. He had been swindled. This God had or was himself a swindler. No different from Grenouille, only a considerably worse one. I underlined that made me laugh. God stinks. But I think that's, that's obviously it's related, but it's different of like when you get to this level of realizing kind of how ridiculous religion is and how deeply we've let it be ingrained and how we treat other people both positively and negatively, you know, how we let it dictate everything that he's sitting here having this kind of out of body, out of mind realization of like, and it's not even good. Like, it sucks anyway. Would I. Okay, here's a game I want to play as well. It's called, back in those times, the witch trials. Okay. Obviously, horrendous, horrifying versions of it still exist today. Okay. In those times, though, in the Middle Ages, would I have been accused of being a witch? Now, the short answer is yes. Look at me. Now, the long answer is. I want to take a quiz. Would I have been accused of being a witch during the witch trials? Here is a list of 17 signs that you'd qualify as a witch in 1692. Number one, you are a woman. Okay, in this cosplay, it's a bit hard to tell, but like I said, Uncle Fester is on his period. So. Number two, you cannot support yourself financially. No. You are rich or financially independent. How is that. Why would they have called someone who's rich a witch? Wouldn't they have, like, glazed them? You have one or more woman friends. You have had an argument with one or more of your woman friends. You are very old. You are very young. Dorothy Good was only four years old when she confessed to being a witch. Oh, my God. Dorothy was imprisoned for nine months before her release. You are a healer. You are married with too few or no children. Your neighbors are having trouble conceiving. What the fuck? You have a mole, birthmark, or third nipple butter or milk has spoiled in your fridge. You've had sex out of wedlock, which you've attempted to predict the identity of your future husband. So I guess yearning makes you a witch. Let's do the next one. 10 bizarre reasons people were accused of witchcraft during the Salem witch trials. Number one, being sarcastic. Okay, so everyone was stupid. Number two, you didn't hear the question. At the hallowed age of 71, Rebecca Nurse was one of the oldest people accused of witchcraft in Salem. The nail in her coffin, so to speak, was when they straight up asked her if she was a witch, and she failed to respond because she was an old lady, and she literally didn't hear them slamming the church door, lifting something heavy, making a witch cake. Someone claimed to have seen a flock of birds land on your head one time. Your child said so. Having an unfavorable personality. Damn. That's why they call it a witch hunt, dude. It's because it's just nonsensical. It is truly nonsensical because. What do you mean which? What does that even mean? What is the difference between a ghost and a ghoul? I would like to know what is the difference between ghost and ghoul? We're going to Reddit. We're going to r. AskReddit. Naturally, a ghost is a spirit or apparition. A ghoul is more like a zombie, specifically a sentient one. You're telling me a ghoul is a corporeal. Corporeal being. Corporeal as in having a corpus? As in being a body. Corporal. Corporeal ghoul. Picture of ghoul. Hey, jarvis, show me a picture of a ghoul. Oh, wow. Whoa. My version of the ghoul R DND Okay. Fallout ghouls. Yeah, I've seen this dude from Fallout. So they have, like, these crazy tongues and they're kind of fleshy. Yeah, they're kind of like zombies. Okay. What is the origin of. What is the origin of ghouls? In folklore, a ghoul is a demon like being or monstrous humanoid, often associated with graveyards and the consumption of human flesh. The concept of the ghoul originated in pre Islamic Arabian religion. Modern fiction often uses the term to label a specific kind of monster. By extension, the word ghoul is also used in a derogatory sense to refer to a person who delights in the macabre or whose occupation directly involves death, such as a gravedigger or grave robber. I would like to talk about Guillermo del Toro's Frankenstein because I believe it's out. I believe it's out, and I'm so excited to see it. I actually might go see it tonight. Fuck it. I'm very excited for that movie. I just went to, by the way, Universal Studios in Florida, and Dark Universe opened in Epic Universe, which is that new park that's opened, and it was so cool. Dark Universe is entirely themed like Frankenstein, Dracula and Werewolf. I got my life, me, dressed like this in the park. Dracula real. They built, like, the Frankenstein manor. And the whole storyline is Henry Frankenstein or Victor Frankenstein. Whichever one of them who created Frankenstein's monster, it's his great granddaughter, Victoria Frankenstein, who now runs Frankenstein Manor and is creating, like, with kind of modern ish technology, like this weird siphon of energy. And she trapped Dracula and she's zapping that bitch. She's zapping that bitch and has him in one of the crypts. And it has all these monsters and even, like, a mummy in the crypt. And there's this crazy ride that you could go on. It's like, I got my life and I got a hoodie. You know, when it's good, you have to buy merch. So I had bought some merch, but I really, really enjoyed it. And they reconstructed this old, like, Eastern European town, kind of like from the books from Whatever. Of. Of these people living in fear of the local monster, you know, and they kind of managed to combine the fear of vampires and the ghouls and the werewolf, whatever. I don't know if the werewolves fed on human flesh. I'm not sure. But it was so cool because then it's like, you know, the dark gothic kind of like all the buildings sag a little bit and it's all in. It's not German, but it's like Germanic. Like Das steakhouse. Like H A U S. And then you can look in the shop windows and everything has, like, garlic hanging from it. And, like, there's wooden stakes everywhere. I got my fucking life. It was so good. It was very, very good. I got a photo with Frankenstein. Really Frankenstein's monster. And, yeah, I really enjoyed myself. That place is awesome. The ride was great. There's a. There's a werewolf ride. Very fun. I think that I need to figure out what the hell's going on with werewolf. Like the burning windmill. What is that? Werewolf, Burning windmill. Oh, it's from the Frankenstein movie. Burning Windmill. Frankenstein. It's a famous climactic scene from the 1931 movie Frankenstein where an angry mob corners the monster in a windmill and sets it on fire. The scene represents the villagers fear and rejection of what they don't understand. It is also the inspiration for a fiery windmill effect at the Burning Blade Tavern in Universal's epic universe theme park. Very cool. Yeah. I had no idea. And I thought that that was. Had to do with werewolf. I don't. I don't know. I've never seen any of the werewolf movies. Curse of the Werewolf. Curse of the Whatever. I do feel like him sometimes, though, when I. When I get, you know, kind of freaky. Okay, let's keep going. Okay. So that's ghoul difference between ghoul and ghost. Let's look up some superstitions. In America. Some people believe in the magical powers of black cats. I do. I do. And I know that a lot of you are gonna say it's unfair prejudice towards black cats. I don't know, man. I don't know. I don't walk under ladders. I don't do the broken mirror shit when I see a black cat. Okay. They're cute. They are cute. I will admit that. And they look like toothless. Especially if I could see the teeth. Kind of sweet, but I don't. I'm not going to touch it. I don't know. I don't know. It's how I was raised. I don't put a hat on a bed. We've talked about this before. That's an old cowboy superstition. I don't do that. Like it. There's just some things where it's like. I don't know if it's real or not, but I'm not going to do it. Just be safe. And it makes me sound stupid as fuck, but I'm not going to do it. Okay? In North America, it is bad luck if a black cat crosses your path and good luck if a white cat crosses your path. Now that's racist. In Britain and Ireland, it's exactly the opposite. The blue cat in Russia brings good luck. The blue is often viewed as a gray cat. What the hell? Owls. Many people used to believe that owls swoop down to eat the souls of the dying. If they heard an owl hooting, they would become frightened. A common remedy was thought to be turning your pockets inside out and you would be safe. Humans are so dumb. Like, what do you mean? Dis cat bad. This cat good. See an owl turn my pockets inside out. Lick. Assault. Lick. What are you talking about? But I get it at the same time, I get it because, like, I want. I can't put a hat on a bed. I can't do it. I don't know. Some believe if you catch a snail on Halloween night and lock it into a flat dish, that in the morning you will see the first letter of your sweetheart written in the snail slime. And I know some of you freak weirdos are going to do that tonight. I know some of you all are going to do that. Dumb supper. No talking at the dinner table. The dumb supper was brought to America by the Africans. This is an eerie hallow muss meal where nobody is allowed to speak, not even whisper. It encourages spirits to come to the table. In Britain, people believed that the devil was a nut gatherer. At Halloween, nuts were used as magic charms. Peel an apple from top to bottom. The person with the longest unbroken peel would be assured the longest life. Ew, that's scary. If you threw the apple peel over your shoulder, the initial it forms upon landing is the initial of your future mate. See, that shit's stupid. Because what if you're already married? What are you supposed to do now you're fighting with your husband now? Now you're laying in bed fighting because I told you that we weren't supposed to be together. I told you that this wasn't gonna work out. And look, we worked through it. And I know that we had the kids, but I just feel like my soulmate's out there. I just feel like he's out there in fighting with your partner in ancient. I'm gonna mispronounce this, and I'm sorry. It's the Irish word for the festival. Shamain. S A M H A I n. Shamain. Festivals. Bats would swoop over blazing fires to eat the mosquitoes. If a bat flies around a house three times, it's a death omen. If bats come out early and fly around playfully, it's a sign of good weather to come. If a bat flies into a house, it is a sign that ghosts are about and maybe the ghost let the bat in. If a bat flew into my house, I'd kill myself. If a bat flew into my fucking house, call the police, call the fire department and set my house on fire. I can't. I can't live there anymore. That's the bat's house. It's not mine. Knock on wood. Oh, my God. I do this all the time. If a girl puts a sprig of rosemary, herb and a silver sixpence under her pillow on Halloween night, she will see her future husband in a dream. All right, let me repeat that for all you weirdos. If a girl puts a sprig of rosemary and a silver sixpence under her pillow, what is sixpence? Not in general circulation and has no face value in the U.K. fuck. Though a decimal sixpence was briefly valued at 2.5 new pence. Okay, well, what would it be? It's 1 40th of a pound or half a shilling. 1 40th of a pound. I can't even do that math and I don't give a fuck. And I don't care, too. Knocking on wood keeps bad luck away. You should walk around your home three times backwards and counterclockwise before sunset on Halloween to ward off evil spirits. But here's the thing, right? There's so many conflicting customs and traditions and best practices because sometimes on Halloween, as we've read, you're inviting the spirits in, okay? Like reconnecting with loved ones or lost souls. Now, other times, you're warding away bad spirits. So are you inviting them in or are you making them go away? Pick one. And you know what's really, actually the most scary of all is that I put this white ass face paint on my face and my hands match and I didn't paint my hands. I'm just that fucking white. I'm just simply that white. It's upsetting. Why? Knock on wood? A superstition with roots in pagan and Christian beliefs. And by the way, we can't say lives, it's lives, but we can say belie beliefs. Well, I guess there's not an E on the end of that word. Nevermind answered my own question. Knocking on wood is an apotropaic tradition of literally touching, tapping, or knocking on wood, or merely stating that one is doing or intending to do so in order to avoid tempting fate after making a favorable prediction or boast or declaration concerning one's own death or another unfavorable situation. Apotropaic magic, or protective magic, is a type of magic intended to turn away harm or evil influences, as in deflecting misfortune or averting the evil eye. Apotropaic observances may also be practiced out of superstition or out of tradition, as in good luck charms, amulets, or gestures such as crossed fingers or knocking on wood. Many different objects and charms are used for protection by people throughout the world. Yeah. Whoa. That is nuts, honestly. Because all this shit permeates every single religion and they're all pagan superstitions. And that, like, by definition is. What's the word? A religious. It's blasphemous. It's blasphemous, but we still do it. There are connections between ancient spirituality and trees influencing fortune. In the pre Christian beliefs of the Germanic people, for example, three norns set fate up into the universe through a tree. Languages descended from these people include concepts such as knock on wood, touch wood, or three times wood, although only the first two expressions are in the descended English language specifically. Meanwhile, the ancient Celtic peoples also believed that the act of touching wood called on spirits or gods of the trees. Christians tie the practice to the symbolism of the wood of the cross of crucifixion. So much to keep up with. Pick your poison, whatever makes you feel protected. I knock on wood, I don't walk under ladders. I dress up as Uncle Fester, and I have my period. Okay, those are the four things that I kind of do to make myself feel protected. Sometimes having your period is a form of divine protection because. What are you doing? What are you doing down there? You need to protect what's going on down there. Essential Halloween movies and television to watch. Number one is going to be, in my opinion, the Addams Family. Number two, Addams Family values. Number three, Corpse Bride. Corpse Bride. I love the Corpse Bride. And let me say this, and I mean this, I love the Corpse Bride more than Nightmare Before Christmas. Nightmare Before Christmas. Is it a Christmas Movie. Is it a Halloween movie? It's neither. You can watch it any time of the year. I would say it's more. I want it to be a Halloween movie, but it ends up being a Christmas movie, and I don't like that. The Corpse Bride is a Halloween movie. I don't really go for the kind of, like, Jason, Texas Chainsaw Massacre. I'm not doing that scary shit, okay? I want a campy, silly Elvira. I want a campy, silly, spooky movie that I can enjoy. Corpse Bride is probably my number one. I would go for that every single year. Edward Scissorhands, maybe. Maybe there are a bunch of movies like that where I'm like, yeah, throw that on. I'll watch it. Throw that on. It's. It's background noise. Okay, now I would like to give you guys my song of the week. Oh, my God. By the way, Rosalia, new album. Oh, my God. Looks. Rosalia, new album. I can't. I can't even. I can't. We'll discuss it next week. We'll discuss it when I'm not dressed like Uncle Fester because. Oh, my fucking God. And I think the song drops. It drops today. It's 27th. I'm filming this on the 27th. It drops today. Oh, my God. I have to listen to it. Okay. I've been into this song called jungle blues by C.W. stoneking. That's a good, like, Halloween kind of kind of song. I would also recommend Amar Kord by Pino Calvi. I would also recommend that fuck ass song I said a few years or a few weeks ago. Heroine by the Tiger Lilies. That song's fucked up. I like it. I've been into. On a different note, I'm back into old Beyonce Bitch. Grown Woman by Beyonce. Fuck you. Fuck you. Y' all really sleep on some of her old stuff. Standing on the sun, her song with Coldplay. I think there are so many sleeper hits that we just kind of glossed over. So those are my songs, guys. Broski Shop, Moo Moo's Broski Report merch. And there's something exciting coming, okay? Something exciting coming soon. So keep your eyes peeled for that. The Patreon is live. If you'd like to watch these episodes, add free. Guess What? You can. Patreon.com Go ahead and do that. All that shit's in the description. I don't know it off the top of my head. Sue me and have a happy Halloween. Go. Happy Halloween. Bye, guys.