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- [00:00]
A
Like, I started doing so many drugs, started drinking so much sex, became an idol, called out to God and I was like, ruined my life, dude. I got a second degree felony that day.
- [00:10]
B
If you wanted to watch this episode early, exclusive content and more, check out our Patreon. Our Patreon is the best place for you guys to support us, keep us producing the podcast, keep producing the evangelism videos, sending us out on the street. And in return, you get exclusive content that will only be available on Patreon, early access to all podcast, evangelism videos, our inner circle group chat, and more. So if you want to support us, go to patreon.com bright Bryce Crawford. Today, join the Patreon Support the mission. Get early access to podcast videos, exclusive content and more. What's going on, guys? Welcome back to another episode of the Bryce Crawford Podcast. I'm Bryce, and today I have a very special guest friend. Incredible Soul got Jaden Hustler with me.
- [00:48]
A
What's up? Everybody doing good? Yeah, I'm feeling great, man.
- [00:51]
B
Fun fact for everyone watching or listening right now. Tried to get Jaden on a couple years ago. Yes, a couple years ago. And now we get to sit down now.
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A
All God's timing.
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B
I'm glad we're getting to sit down now because we have a lot more to talk about.
- [01:03]
A
Me too. It's so funny how it works. I remember a few years ago, I was just like, all right. Our friend Curtis asked me to. He was like, you need to get in contact with this dude. And I looked up what you were about and I was like, oh, heck no. No, he can't have me on the podcast, bro. He wouldn't be able to put it up. But now it works out. God's timing, bro.
- [01:23]
B
Dude, I'm so happy you're on here. Yeah, you know, I really just want to, like, focus on everything. Your life, your upbringing. I mean, I feel like when it comes to social media is very popular and a thing right now. It's growing more popular every day. Doom scrolling all this stuff. You've been on the Internet for quite a while.
- [01:43]
A
Yes, bro.
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B
In that space.
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A
Sadly, an OG now, which is crazy.
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B
I'm like, would you say you're an unc? You're an uncle. Social media. You kind of are.
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A
I mean, you really are. I'm like, I'm getting old. My knees hurt. My spiritual needs, my social media needs. Yeah.
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B
I mean, hey, you know, it is what it is. But you've, you have. You were one of the first people that was. Was on social media. Particularly tick tock. Now you do music.
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A
Yeah.
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B
And you love Jesus.
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A
Amen.
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B
I want to rewind back to when you were young. Like, what were you from? What was it like being raised by your family? What was life like growing up?
- [02:21]
A
Tell us a little bit about that. Growing up was crazy. I always knew that I was going to do something. I had no idea that it was going to be tick tock and then music. As I'm sure a lot of people that do tick tock, they're there at one point, they're like, I would never do that. And then like a month later they're doing it and they're dancing and the whole thing, but they're dancing in the whole thing.
- [02:41]
B
That's funny.
- [02:42]
A
My. My parents are pastors. When I was born, 2001 in Grapevine, Texas, I grew up the majority of my life in Dallas. All throughout Dallas, too. So my parents were pastors for about like 12 years. My life solidified. And then my dad worked in the ministry after that. And without saying too much about him, there's just a lot of things that took us out of the church and then back in and then out of the church. And so we moved a lot. Dude, I moved like 15 times before I was 14 in Dallas, and so grew up, like, weirdly with a. A poor mentality. You know, I think that there was different things going on that we didn't have to live that way, that we did. Like, my dad made money, but we lived as if we were dirt poor, you know. And so that put a specific strain, a specific consciousness since I was like, really young, about money and the stress of money. And also like in the south, you know, the Bible Belt and everyone calls it. It's so funny how religion really overtakes more than like, the spirit of God. And so I was thrusted into that at an early age. And so a lot of knowledge, a lot of exposure to the spirit, into the word. Then after, when I was about 14, 15, I moved to Chattanooga, Tennessee. My dad got a job out there, went to a Baptist high school, which was like, I grew up pretty charismatic. And then I went to this Baptist school that they didn't believe in the Holy Spirit. So it was a pretty crazy juxtaposition. And I was like the worst kid I ever met in my life. So it was. It was awesome combinations for disaster. It wasn't like an awful life growing up. A lot of bad memories, but a lot of, like, good memories. Like, I love my mom to death. That's my best friend. She just had her 60th. 60th birthday.
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B
Let's go.
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A
Yeah, the 20th.
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B
Happy birthday, Mrs. Hustler.
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A
Happy birthday, Mom. She's so happy that I'm doing this.
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B
I told her, dude, that's awesome. Well, big happy birthday to your mom.
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A
And she looks like she's, like, 45, so whatever she's doing, everybody else should tap in. But, yeah. So I went to school in Chattanooga, Tennessee. Graduated there on my last year. I was. Dude, I was just such a. An idiot is literally the right word. I was just like, there's so many things that I could have done. I had a good heart, but I just, like, acted like a fool in high school, dude. I just wanted to be seen and loved. And so I say that because it all led up to my senior year by my own doing, really. I was just so depressed for the first time. I was, like, incredibly depressed. I never really was anxious growing up, but I. I remember feeling depressed for the first time and understanding, like, what it was my senior year.
- [05:24]
B
What caused you to feel depressed?
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A
Like, a lot of bad decisions. And then those bad decisions led to, like, isolation. Like, I lost a lot of friends also. I do think that now, looking back, I was set apart. You know, it's all a part of God's plan. Uses our mistakes for good. And that was, like, the beginning of that process because it led me to be. Dude, I skipped, like, 90 days in my senior year. I know it. Was that even legal? No. No, it was not. But they did not want me to return, so they graduated me. I literally remember specifically, I was failing. I was pretty good at school. I didn't really have to study much. I just understood the process, and. But I was failing my English class. And I remember my English teacher, Ms. Popf, bless her heart, bro, she really, like, loved me. She really loved, like, the Troublemakers, funny enough. And I was, like, the ringleader of the Troublemakers, so she was very sweet to me. And I remember I was failing by, like, three points. And. And then one day, she just came in and she, like, handed me, and I was, like, passing. And so I got to graduate right when this was happening, the beginning of 2019.
- [06:30]
B
Wait, you said Mrs. Puff was her name?
- [06:32]
A
Yeah, Mrs. Puff.
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B
Wait, hold on. I think that's. Mrs. Puff is a go. But, like. But really, I think, man, I think what you said before you in your story, this is so random. But isn't it nice when you have a teacher that believes in you?
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A
Oh, my gosh, dude, it's, like, the.
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B
Greatest thing of all time.
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A
It's the greatest thing of all time. And I think people, it's so hard when you're a kid to understand what it actually takes to be a teacher. So you're like giving them the worst day of their life every day and you think that they deserve it. But there are bad teachers. You know what I mean? Even though it is a hard job, there's teachers that really don't think about how much it's impacting a child. And so, yeah, blessings to her. Also my counselor at the school, like, when I was having rough lunches, bro, I would go in her lunch, I mean, in her office and like, cry, bro. I was, I was, I was, I was a crier. I've been a crier my whole life. And so they were just like accepting of me. And I also remember the teachers that were not very nice, you know, that I won't name, but, well, then you.
- [07:30]
B
You always have those. Yeah, you know, there's always going to be those. But like, dude, the big thank you to all the teachers out there. Seriously, like, seriously, I, I, I'm, I'm right there with you. I, I can count and name drop all the ones that I'm like, man, you guys are awesome. You believed in me. I felt like I had your support. And having, having such a good teacher is the greatest blessing. You don't really fully understand the impact of the blessing until you don't have them.
- [07:56]
A
Yeah, exactly. 100.
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B
Because then you're like, wow, you were one of a kind. One of a kind, unique, caring, patient. And teachers are also the most patient people on the planet. I, I like, actually the most patient. You're absolutely right. You give them, give them a hard time, give them crap and they, they take it on the chin every day.
- [08:12]
A
They're not getting paid what you think they're getting paid, bro. It's like everything that it takes to have a sound mind as an adult, they don't really get that benefit. And so if you have a good teacher, be aware of it right now and go tell them you love them, bro. Like, I promise you also, it'll shift yalls relationship too. In school, like, I was, I was very impacted by them and I, I hope they were impacted by me. They believed in me and what I was going to do. They had no idea what I was going to do. So hopefully if they like caught up with me after the fact and saw what I was doing, they were happy about it. So, yeah, shout out Ms. Puff. Yeah, she's killing.
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B
Yeah, shout out Ms. Pop P O F F, yeah.
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A
P O, F, F. Yeah. That's a dope name. It is.
- [08:52]
B
Shout out Ms. Pop. Shout out Mr. McCor. Shout out Mr. Schaefer. Shout out Mr. Hendrix. Yeah, we just start dropping it. Yeah. Yeah, those are, those, those are my favorite. Yeah. I love, I love you guys. Ms. Cook. Big shout out to Ms. Swanson. Yo, Ms. Cook was the goat. Ms. Swanson. Come on, let's do everything. That's awesome. Anyways, you get. So Mrs. Puff and your counselor, they're helping you through this rough time.
- [09:15]
A
Yeah, so. And then like I just mentioned to you a little bit before, this kid named Curtis Newville. At the time, like I said, I was pretty enriched in ministry. All different forms and shapes and types. And my dad worked at this place called Preset Ministries. K. Arthur, she passed on to be in heaven with Jesus, I think just a couple years ago. But she was a lady of diligence and she was a phenomenal writer. But it was basically she would do Bible studies over the Word and like in depth Bible studies. There's a certain word for it that I'm forgetting, but like the Greek and the Hebrew and the Aramaic at a certain point. And so I was, every summer, right, I was going and doing these like two week camps at this location called Preset Ministries. And people would sign up from all across the world and go. My dad worked there, so I, I, I got to go and be a part of it. And Curtis was my Bible counselor bro.
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B
And which Curtis also does social media.
- [10:18]
A
Yeah, he does.
- [10:18]
B
He, which is so funny that you guys met there.
- [10:21]
A
Well, this is the craziest thing. So we met there and I did not want to be there at all. But looking back, I'm so glad I did. It gave me such a different perspective. Like, if you're getting into reading the Bible, the Bible is layered and it's not supposed to be as surface level and shallow. You're supposed to want to know what it means and you're supposed to want to know how it applies to you. It's alive, you know. And so understanding the Greek and the Hebrew and the Aramaic, the original context is so and powerful, you know, gives you such a different lens of what it's really trying to say to you with context. And so in the moment, I hated that. I didn't want context and I didn't want scripture at all. So it seemed annoying at the time. But like God does with the invisible thread, Curtis was there and he was doing musically. Right. A lot of people who know me think that I started on musically I did not musically was a thing, like 2018, and then it got bought out in the beginning of 2019. I remember Curtis came to me and he was like, bro, you gotta. You gotta hop on musically. Like, he was hyping me up. He was like, bro, you're so cute. You gotta do it. You know, just. He was like, just.
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B
Yo, he was.
- [11:24]
A
He was just like, be cute on the app. And I'm like, no, bro. Like, I just shaved my. I just shaved my head. And I was like, no one wants to see that. And. But then he. He took me. I was over at his place one time, and he was showing me. He went live, and he was showing me how much money he made online. And I was like, okay, yeah, I'm gonna do this. And so I. As soon as tick tock became a thing in my head, I was like, yeah, I can do tick tock. I'm not gonna do musically, but I'm going to do TikTok. And so I hopped on it. And within, like, the first month or two, it was just such a. This is. At the same time I was telling you I was depressed, right? And so wasn't really hanging out with a bunch of friends at my school. My school, by the way, had 126 people, maybe in the whole school. Like, the whole high school. Yeah, I had, like, 27 people in my class.
- [12:06]
B
Everyone knew each other.
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A
Yeah, everyone, bro. And so when I was on this app at the time, y' all cannot probably imagine this, but there was no hate, bro. There was not hate. Wasn't a thing on this app. Because if you were on the app, you knew about and you wanted to be on it, like, you wanted to be weird. You know what I mean? And I was very happy with being weird. And so I started doing it and it just started working, you know? And I felt this, like, affirmation that I had not felt before and this Appreciate appreciation for, like, the weirdest videos ever, bro. Like, I can't even tell you how weird it was looking back, but in the moment, I didn't feel that way at all. And so it started this, like, hunger for more of that. I wanted more of that. Obviously, I was starting to make money slowly at the beginning, like, by going live, but it was really just the acceptance that I so willfully. How.
- [12:58]
B
How quick was. How quick was like, the explosion of. Of eyeballs on you? I can't imagine a combination of being depressed and then going to social media for, like, the dopamine, like, like to numb it out, but then not Only the thing that you're going to. To numb it out. But you're getting dopamine hits.
- [13:18]
A
Yeah.
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B
And a buttload of people looking at you all at the same time.
- [13:21]
A
Yeah.
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B
That sounds like the craziest combination ever.
- [13:24]
A
It was. I remember the first. I did it for, like, a week, and I remember the first week I got my first thousand views, and it was like, everything's relative, bro. Even throughout your career. The problem is we get desensitized to that relative. Relativeness. Right? Because, like, in the beginning, that thousand views felt like a hundred thousand. You know what I mean? I'd never seen a thousand people in front of me, you know? So that number felt so big, and it became this, like, addiction of, like, wow, if I can do that, then I can do the next. I can do five thousand or ten thousand or a thousand likes. And it was just random stuff. And so within, like, the first month or two. And I also had Curtis, who really gave me like, a. He was on the. Musically for before. So there was kind of like, this. Everyone talks about the algorithm now. It was much simpler back then, and you could really figure it out and kind of play into it. And so my whole goal was to get big enough to be a part of other things that were on the app, right? And so people would go to, like, these. This convention called Playlist Live, and just this whole world that I had no idea about, you know, and it's so funny. Everyone knows about what it is now, so they can either judge it or not, but in the moment, it was like, there was no judgment. It was just like, wow, I want to be a part of this, and I want to get out of my city. So I did. Within the first month or two, I got, like, around, I think, 50, 000 followers on the app, which was crazy. And I was really working this system. Ended up doing a few things, like Playlist Live. And this is the. Dude, this is the crazy story. I've never told this story before online. All right, so this is. This is wild. And it's awesome to look back at a life and, like, be proud of every single moment that's happened. Honestly, I genuinely am. I have no regrets in the sense of, like, would I change it? Because, again, God brought me here.
- [15:04]
B
As you should, because. Right. Like you said earlier, he works everything together for the good. And we wouldn't be really sitting here if you didn't experience everything.
- [15:10]
A
Absolutely. So I ended up hearing about this Chase Hudson, right. Little Huddy was, like, the biggest on the app, I think at the time. And I actually really looked up to him because I was, like, painting my nails in high school, and, like, I wanted to get earrings and. And all this stuff, and that was not allowed where I'm from, like, at all. I actually remember very specifically I got my ears pierced from. I went to LA for the first time with Curtis. I got my ears pierced right before I graduated. And I came back literally just to graduate the day of. And I got my ears pierced the day before. And you can't take your. That. You can't take them out, especially when you first get them, because they'll, like, close up so fast. Yeah. And I was in line to graduate, and the doors were open in the auditorium, and my superintendent or my principal came running over and started, like, screaming at me in front of everyone. And, like, the entire auditorium, all the parents, all the grandparents started, like, we're, like, listening, screaming at me to take out my earrings. And I was like, dude, I literally can't. Like, I just got them done. And he was like, you have to or you're not graduating. And I was probably. Was like, it was so embarrassing at the time, you know? And I was just like, oh, whatever. So I had to take him out. And, like, within the. The graduation ceremony, I got out and they closed up, and my friends, like, had to put them in. I was bleeding.
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B
It was.
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A
It felt much more dramatic in the moment, but it was. That was, like, where it was. I got. I almost got suspended for painting my nails, like, in high school. Like, it was very. Like, the judgment was obvious. You know what I mean? There was no understanding. And obviously there's rules to school, so I'm not saying to break rules, even though I definitely did break so many rules at school. But it was just the way it felt, you know what I mean? It felt very. Felt very oppressed in the moment. Right? That's like a new word everyone really likes to hold on to. That's how it felt in high school. Very different. And so that was, like, all I needed to be like, okay, I'm out of here. Yeah, Chase Hudson was big on the app. I looked up to him, bro. I was just like, this kid's doing whatever he wants. He doesn't care what people say. Like, that's cool, you know? And so I ended up finding out that he was on this tour called Lights Out Tour. I don't know if you've ever heard of magcon. And the way this all ties in together is so crazy, so bear with me. So I have about 10,000 followers on Instagram, 50,000 on. On tick Tock. And I remember finding this account, the Lights Out Tour, and it was Chase Hudson and Peyton Mormeyer. Peyton's such a good kid. He lives in North Carolina. I love him. He makes music, too. And I really wanted to go on this tour. I was like, what? I want to be a part of this. And so I told all of my fans online to go to this page and just spam them and tell him to put Jaden on the tour. That's literally what I told him. And for some reason, all my fans listen, they did. And the account run by the manager hit me up and was like, congratulations, you got my attention. But I don't appreciate soliciting. And I was like, oh, dude, my bad. And he was like, what do you want? And I was like, I want to go on the tour. And he goes, sorry, tour's full. And I was like, okay. And then, like, a couple days later, he hit me back and was like, what's your number? So I gave him my number. He calls me. I remember it was a Wednesday. And he was like, can you come to LA tomorrow? And I was like, what? I had, like, 500, 600 in my bank account because I worked at this place, place called Fazoli's Fast Food. Italian, bro.
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B
I know, dude. Yeah, dude, we can't skip over that.
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A
We can't.
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B
Fazoli.
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A
Yeah, bro. Bro. In the flesh, dog, bro.
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B
I. I, like, I have a serious vendetta towards Fazoli's bro. I actually have a serious vin.
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A
They did you dirty, bro.
- [18:39]
B
I. I just, like. Yeah, I. I have a serious bitterness towards Fazoli. So. Yeah, there's. Yeah. I'm so sorry. You work there.
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A
No, it's okay. Honestly, it was, like, so funny because I really. I've never really had to work with my hands a lot. You know, just in high school, I was. I worked there. I worked at, like, a bakery. I. I mowed lawns and stuff. But now as I've gotten older, I kind of crave it and I miss it. So I'm glad I had that little part of my life just to know that I, like, can and would. And I, like, worked diligently, but yeah, dude, the food. Don't eat the food there.
- [19:11]
B
Yeah, bro. D. Do not go to Fazoli's Real estate.
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A
Trust us. That's.
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B
Don't go there. She have 500 because she worked at Fazoli's. Yeah.
- [19:20]
A
He's like, can you come tomorrow? And I'm like, yeah, I'm like, yeah, let's do it. So I buy my ticket, I tell my parents right in that moment. It was funny because he was like, management was really shady in the beginning because no one really knew about it. It wasn't mainstream like it was in the beginning. So he sent me this one page contract. I remember my dad read it and he was like, yeah, it's good. It wasn't good. Okay. My dad didn't know what he was reading and so he was wanting to sign me, but also at the same time he wasn't wanting to put me on the tour. And so I am just wide eyed and willful and I'm like, let's go. So I pull up, it's in Orange County. I uber from the airport to his house and all just like trusting. I didn't ask any questions. It was all very like silly of me first off. But I pull up to his house, his garage is open. This manager that's running this tour and there's boxes everywhere in the garage. And he's just at his computer. And I remember, I pull up and he turns around, he goes straight up, I never met this guy. And he turns around, he goes, oh, hey. And I was like, hey. And I'm like, at his house. And he goes, can you help me package these boxes? Immediately he's like, can you help me package these boxes? I'm like, yeah, of course. You know, I'm just like from the South. So I'm like, yeah, sure, no problem. I go, and I start packing these boxes. It's little huddie merch. And so that's literally my entire career started. No one knows this, but I started packaging little huddies merch. And we did that for the rest of the night. I met up with a few other people. We ended up spending a week. I met Chase, I met this kid named Griffin, I met this girl named Maddie, this guy named Chris, and a few others. And so we spent this week, we ended up going to this hotel that he got for us. Really nice hotel. In my opinion. It was like a Hilton of sorts. And he walks in and he's like, oh, we can't stay here, this is disgusting. Like, we can't stay here. And we're like, what? What are you talking about? I grew up like poor, like I said. And so I was just stoked to be in this. It was like a suite, right? It's like, no, we can't stay here. This is disgusting. So we end up leaving this hotel and he takes us to the nicest Hotel in Irvine. Like, the nicest hotel I've ever been in my entire life. Like, literally, like, I'd never even seen technology like this in the rooms. Like, it was crazy, right? And so we spend there about a week there, and it was awesome. I ended up having to fly home. The tour wasn't right then yet. It was like a few weeks in the future. And so I go back home, and when I get home, he invoices me for, like, $4,000. I'm like, Bro, what? I don't know. Why'd you invoice me? He was like, do you. I remember he said, do you think it was free to stay? Question mark? And so this is what happens with these managers, right? They get you and they. They kind of fluff you up, and then they tell you something, and it's like you kind of get caught up in this situation. And I had signed this contract, so this one page contract. And so I was, like, caught up. And he was like, it's okay. You can work it off. And I was like, okay. So he ends up doing this tour. I go out. Long story short, I go out to the tour, and I'm basically, like, helping him with the tour. I'm a part of it, but I'm not. Like, I'm a volunteer of sorts. And so this is where I met a lot of my friends at the beginning of my life in la. Anthony and Josh and a few other people that were on these stores. And, like, I never been a part of this, bro. I had no idea what was going on, but I was honestly so stoked. Like, I was so stoked. This is when I first started really smoking weed. Like, I smoked weed in high school, but I was just with all my friends, we were, like, smoking weed. And we started this tour in Arizona, I remember, specifically. And this tour was just a meet and greet tour, so I'm sure you understand, but this was like 1500, 2000, like, kids, right? That would come.
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B
So all y' all would do is just meet them.
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A
That's it for six hours straight, bro. It was kind of gnarly. Six hours straight. We would just stand in line, and then they would come through and take pictures with us, right? And so I wasn't anybody. I didn't have a lot of followers at that time. Like, I had some, but not compared to these, everyone else on the tour. And this is a true story. They would line up the biggest, like, at the beginning or in. I can't remember, but. And then they would, like, funnel it down, right? And So I should have been down here. But I remember I was friends with Josh and Anthony and them and they were kind of like big on the app. And so I just went and stood next to them and people were passing by me for like the first few shows and I hated it. And I was like, I was like, no. So in my head, I have no idea what led me to do this, bro, but true story, they would be there with their parents because they're like aged from like 10 to like, you know, 14 or whatever. And I just started shaking the parents hands and introducing myself. And for some reason this caught on. If, you know, like when you go do something and your mom comes up to me like, oh my gosh, do you like this? And you're like, no, mom. Like, shut up. Like, I don't like them. But that's what was happening. Like all these parents were like, oh, I like this kid, you know, and he's introducing himself and I started making videos with the boys. And literally within a month, dude, I gained like 1.52 million followers on the. And so this was like the golden age of like social media just became a thing. Like the whole Eboy thing became a thing. And people were coming to the app to either hate it or love it. And it was the perfect situation for us because that's what like kept funneling in from two different angles, like this app exploding. And before this, you could ask people if they were on TikTok and they were like, what? We don't even know what you're talking about. And you can't even imagine that now of how integrated it is. And so. But the craziest part about all of this is we had six hours of meet and greet and then stage time. And stage time was literally exactly what it says. That's it. We would. They would just run up on stage and like the girls and the people in the crowd would just scream. And it was incredibly like awkward, right? And really like made. It was like an ick for sure. And. But it was fun, whatever. And I just couldn't bear that we weren't doing anything on stage. So I remember very early on on the tour, I asked him, I was like, yo, just give me a microphone. And they were like, why? And I was like, I'm just gonna sing. And so they gave me a microphone row. And for like every show, for about like 10 minutes, I would go up on stage and just sing acapella, like anything and everything. I would sing random like 30 second songs. I would sing whatever. There's probably some clips online and I definitely don't sound good, but I was just like going for it, bro. Like, it was so crazy how now looking back, like God used those moments, you know? Yeah. And yeah, at the end of that tour I went to, there was like two legs event at the end of the second one, I. We were on top of the world, bro. Like, we were making money. We got to just travel the world on this bus with all these new friends I made. And I'd never been to a concert in my life besides like maybe a Christian concert, but I've never been to a concert. And I was really obsessed with Juice wrld. And we were in Dallas for the last stop and Juice WRLD was playing a show and I was like, oh my gosh, we have to go. So I got me and my homies all tickets we went and it was my first experience in like an arena or anything. And I remember listening to Juice WRLD sing this song called Empty and Brothers this line and I heard 10,000 people singing it at once. And I was in the middle of this pit, bro. They opened up the VIP so we were like real close to Juice. And I heard. I didn't just hear people singing. I heard people like crying it from their soul. Dude, this is like a real moment for me. I was in the grand, I started tearing up in the mosh. And I remember, like moments were like, are you good? And I'm like, yeah, bro, I'm awesome. I'm doing great. And in that moment I got like the best way I could describe it. Now, being in Christ, I kind of know what this means. But before, this is what I described it on a lot of interviews and stuff of like, I got new eyes and new ears in that moment. And I understood what music was. And it was like, I find I found my purpose, like what I was supposed to do my entire life. I started singing when I was younger, when I saw Never say Never by Justin Bieber Shout out Bieber. And I just looked at him, I was like, bro, that's me. I was like, me and Bieber are going to be friends one day. Which is crazy if you know the events of life. And so in this moment, it all came together and I was. It was like, I'm. It wasn't I want to be. It was, I am a musician. Like, I am an artist, you know, I just felt it hit my soul. And so we were like. I said, we were on a bus and I met this girl named Maddie Monroe. And I was like, I can't go home, bro. I can't go back home. And so I called Maddie and I was like, yo, she was the only person I knew that lives in L. A. Can I. Can I come stay with you, bro? I'll stay on the ground. I'll stay on the couch. I'll stay anywhere. She's like, yeah, you can stay in my guest house. And I'm like, what guest house? I didn't know they had those. And so I stay on the bus, right? The bus is driving back to la. I think it's just me and the bus driver and then maybe the manager and drive back to la, like, a day. And I get to LA and I pull up to her house. It's like, the nicest house I think I've stayed in, even, like, really to this day, bro. Her dad's, like, a Hall of Fame MLB baseball player, like, all these random things. So I was, like, homeless, but living nicer than I ever had lived in my entire life. And I stayed with them for six months, and again, I was there I went, because I was like, I'm a musician. Like, I'm gonna make music. And her mom was this agent for tv, and she kept wanting me to do these TV things. And I was on social media. I was still, like, pushing it, you know, I wasn't gonna stop. I was on top of the world, and. But I was like, no, I'm doing music. And so they had, like, guitars and ukuleles. I remember. I, I. There's actually a few videos that I post online in their living room. And I would just sing in her living room. Just singing, singing, singing for about, like, a few weeks a month. And then finally her mom comes in, and she was like, you know, you have a really good voice. And I was like, thank you so much. And she said, are you trying to make music? I was like, yeah, that's why I'm out here. Like, I really want to make music. And she was like, well, I don't know anybody, really, I don't think, but let me see if I can make something happen for you. And so she comes back, and I think a few days later, she gets me in contact with these two producers named Russell, Ali and Sanjoy. And she was like, they're gonna do this for you for, like, pro bono, you know, just like, whatever you make, you know, they'll get a percentage of. And so I went in, and the first studio I ever worked out of was in the back of west coast customs, right? And so, bro, it is, like, blessing after Blessing after blessing, like, And I'm not even questioning it. I'm just saying, yes, you know, so.
- [29:32]
B
So you were doing. And all this time, as everything's unfolding, you're still battling the depression. Battling, like, as all this is unfolding, the thing that blows my mind, which is like. It's like, yes, all things work together for the good for those who are in Christ. God has used everything together for the good for those who are in Christ, like yourself. But in that moment, it's like, man, what a tactic of the devil.
- [30:06]
A
Yes, bro.
- [30:06]
B
To be like, oh, you're depressed. Here's millions of people to follow you and put their eyeballs on you. Oh, that's not working anymore. Oh, yeah. The music career you want hears that as well, and he just keeps throwing it at you. So is that what's going on?
- [30:20]
A
Absolutely. I mean, and at this point, I thought that I was, like, cured, you know? I mean, I'm like, oh, life's great. Like, life's perfect. Like, so many more things that I can even put in this conversation happen. That just felt like direct blessings from God. But I was. What I was telling you before we started this, what you were. What you told Togi, bro, really hit my spirit. And I listened to that after I gave my life to Christ, so it even made more sense. But what if those blessings were distractions, man? And I think so often we get so caught up in how our life can get better, you know, but the better we think it is is not what better actually is, you know? And that's what was happening to me. Everything I could have ever wanted was happening to me. So I was like, oh, God's blessing me, you know?
- [31:07]
B
Yeah. Did you ever have, like, a. Like a. This is my lowest moment, when everyone. Because everyone from the outward appearance is going to go, oh, I want to be in Jaden's shoes right now. Yeah, he's the. He's just got it all together. He's. He's. Everyone loves him. But, like, in the midst of everyone thinking, I want to be in Jaden's position was there. Like, this was my lowest moment.
- [31:29]
A
So it started really kind of after this. I ended up moving into a different house and just like, dude, enriching myself deeper and deeper in the culture, in the drugs. Like, I started doing so many drugs, started drinking so much sex, became an idol, bro. Like, all these things started happening gradually, and then they accelerate, right? And it was at a certain point where my life couldn't. There wasn't a single inch of my life when those things weren't active, not a single inch, you know, daily, you know, and it actually got to the point where less of those things felt like the problem. That's how enriched in, in this, like, sin that I was in, bro. It didn't feel like sin, bro. It felt like I was sinning if I. If I wasn't doing more drugs, you know, which is the craziest. But amidst all this, I met new friends. This, like, false happiness, this false joy. And it's so funny. This is why I love Jesus, because he doesn't. Doesn't take those memories away from me and make me regret them. I just see them for what they truly are now, you know, And I really enjoyed, like, my time, you know, I can't sit here and lie. Like, I met my best friend who passed away, Cooper. During this whole time, I met some people that are still in my life to this day. My manager, you know, during this whole time. And so again, yeah, God does use everything, but it's not because he has to. It's because he's merciful, you know, and he's not the one that is giving you all these opportunities to take away from yourself. And so all this was happening and I started actually losing my mind, bro. Like, I didn't realize it in the beginning, but I started becoming really manic. It would come in and out. I was doing a lot of psychedelics, a lot of drugs, a lot of pills, like I was telling you. And I was going in and out of psychosis. And that's so common nowadays, which is so sad. But I would look at people and say, what are you doing day to day life? Like even vaping, bro, are you vaping? Are you smoking? Are you doing drugs? Are you drinking all the time? You know, I would like, drink, drink, drinking, wake up so depressed and I'm like, oh, bro, like the. The answer is just to do more. You know what I mean? And then when you're sober, you feel like you have something wrong with you, but no, it's just the residual of actually everything else that you have going on. Dang. And really reckless with people's feelings, thinking the world was all about me. This is how the devil works too. He doesn't just lie about something, he uses part of the truth. There is good to, good to a lot of those things. In the beginning, right? When I first started doing drugs, there was no problems. Yeah, when I first started drinking, there was no problems. When I first started having sex, there was no problems. It was all like, oh, joy and Acceptance and freedom. And then he draws you in. It's like he adds on to the truth. So he says, this is true, and it's not bad for you. Right? And it's this. He always adds on, like he does in the beginning with Eve. He doesn't just lie. He adds on to the truth with a lie. Yeah. And. And then what he does. Oh, you just did that. And he starts pointing his finger. He's like, look at you, Jaden. Look at you. You're alone. You're disgusting, dude. Like, you're worthless. Like, you're doing all these things. You don't. You. You don't actually have a brain to control anything. Right?
- [34:37]
B
You don't have that battle.
- [34:39]
A
I think it started with. I remember I was living in this house in Bel Air, and, like I said, I was doing a lot of drugs. And this is so funny. Curtis brought back into my life this. God does this, by the way. He'll bring people back into your life, and you'll know that they're kind of people that are being used by the Lord because your. Your. Your flesh starts flaring up. And I was so mad, bro. Curtis came to my house one night, and I was like, hi, out of my mind. And he looks at me and goes, jay. And this is right after I had put out. And during this whole time, also, my music career broke. Skyrocketed. Like, skyrocketed. I got my first two gold records within, like, the songs that I put out. And so I'm like, again, on this high. On this high. But then there would these be these moments of quietness where it was just, like, scary, right? He comes to me in my house, and we're all living in this house, and we're supposed to be living like millionaires, but, dude, we don't have bed frames. There's, like, it's a mess everywhere. It's like a perfect representation of our brains, you know? And he's like, dude, I want to support you, but I just can't. Like, I really can't. And I was like, what do you mean? He was like, I just feel like God's, like, heartbroken about how you're living, you know? And this pissed me off, dude. I was so mad because I was like, bro, are you kidding me? Look at my life. Like, look at everything that I have. How could God be upset with me if he's giving me all these things? Right. Key point. So. And he didn't necessarily even believe in this at the time. I remember, I. So I got up. I'm like, high out of my mind. I'm like. I start yelling at this guy in my. In my room. I remember as clear as day. And I'm like, I'm like, screw this. I'm like, God, if you, like, are really so upset, like, give me a sign. And so he rolls his eyes kind of. He's like, oh, whatever. Like, screw this. And I'm like, no, no, no. Ruin my life. Ruin my life. Like, I'm so tired of this. Like, I don't. I don't even want to, like, ruin everything I have. Like, I'm so tired. I don't want to feel guilty anymore. Right? Whoa. And so he leaves. Night ends. I continue in doing what I'm doing, which I won't mention. But I wake up the next morning and all my homies are like, this is like kind of peak coven. And we had just traveled to Texas on a flight, and people got really mad at us online. So we were like, all right, we're just gonna drive. And so my homie's like, bro, you gotta come. Like, come on, you gotta hop on the Strip. And I'm like, okay, bro, but we gotta bring weed. Like, we gotta bring weed. Like, I wasn't planning on going, but if we go, I have to have weed. Like, I can't not have weed. So we probably like 4 ounces of weed. Dude, on the Strip, we got a sprinter van. It's like a 24 hour drive. We are 20 minutes outside of the Airbnb in Texas the next day, and we're all asleep and we wake up and our security driver knocks us and he goes, hey, it's the cops. They're going to search the van. Dude, I got a second degree felony that day. The next day after Curtis told me that, and I called out to God and I was like, ruined my life. And the next day I got a second degree.
- [37:37]
B
Did everyone get a felony or.
- [37:39]
A
No, it was a situation where one of our homies was Canadian. And actually in the moment, we. We knew right when we got out, they asked for our IDs, and he pulled out. His ID was like, Canadian. And so it started raising suspicion. And. And there was like six or seven of us. And.
- [37:59]
B
Yeah, that's crazy. He's like, casually talking about getting a felony, but he makes a 6, 7 joke. Like, casually as. He's like, I got arrested.
- [38:06]
A
Who is this guy? And so I. I'm from Texas, so I know that they are going to arrest somebody. Like, I know it, right? And they start asking, do you have any Alcohol in the car. And we were like, no. And they said, do you have any weed? And immediately I was like, yes. I actually got to watch back the body cam footage after the fact with my lawyer. And, dude, I was shook, bro. But, like, I was like, in the moment. I was. I was chilling for a little bit, but I was like, yes, sir. And he said, is it anyone else's? And I was like, I only speak for myself, thinking everyone else is going to be like, yeah, like, it's ours too. We didn't expect my one homie to do it because he would have gotten deported, bro. You know what I mean? Like, bad situation. But I look over. Silence, dude. Just straight silence. And so I'm like, kind of tweaking in my homie Bryce at the time. I look at him, bro, and he's looking at me, and we're looking at each other, and in my head, I'm like, bryce, bro, you got it. Like, you got it. You got to say something. And clear as day. I remember Price. He's sitting there after, like, 10, 15 seconds, and the cop goes, anybody else? And he just. He goes, all right, fine, it's mine too. And I was like, bro, with the hands. And the cop. The cop is like, are you sure? And he's like, yeah, it's mine too. So he took it with me. But the thing that got me was I was using one of my homies backpacks with my laptop, and we had forgotten that in the front of the bag was, like, an edible bar and a shroom bar. And so he's like, whose bag is this? I'm like, yo, it's mine. And he pulls it out and he. I forget what he said, but he was like. When he pulled it out, he was like. He was like, bingo. Or like, ding, ding, ding, or something. Like, he, like, found, like, you know, jackpot for himself to, like, get us in trouble. And I was chilling up until I got to the. To jail. And then they do. They did the whole thing. Like, I'm from the south, like, big proprietor of, like, law enforcement, but, dude, they treated me like straight up an animal, bro. It was like the craziest feeling ever, dude. They were laughing and pointing at me from the desk like it sounds fake when you say it until you're there and you experience it. They were so weirdly joyful that they had gotten us. You know what I mean?
- [40:06]
B
Yeah.
- [40:07]
A
And I remember the sheriff that arrested me walked by the. The cell and knocked on the door. He was like, yeah, it's gonna be a Class A misdemeanor and a second degree felony. So good luck. And then just walks away. I was like, what do you mean, good luck, bro? I'm like sitting in this cell and so got bail just barely. My homie Blake, his mom worked at Chase. The bail bonds place didn't give them money for the charge, so I wouldn't have gotten out if he and his mom didn't step up. So it all worked out in the moment and I flew back home. And you would think this would be my moment where I'm like, oh, God. Like, yeah, dude, you gave me exactly what I'm asking for. Like, this is where I turn my life around. No, I went back home. I went sober for like a month or two maybe. Me and Josh actually moved into an apartment. We stayed with Curtis for a little bit. And then, dude, I just went right back. It wasn't even just like a day. It was just like gradually. I just graduated. Okay, now I'm gonna smoke again. Like, oh, I'm gonna drink again. And then, dude, the second time was, like, funny enough, far worse than the first. Like, maybe not in my actions, but in my soul and my spirit, in my mind, bro. It was like, I think about the parable of the house and the demon being casted out and he can't find water. So he comes back and the house is like, clean and orderly, but empty.
- [41:23]
B
And he brings like, seven bros. Yeah.
- [41:25]
A
Seven bros. Just to mess things up in the second state was worse than the first. That's literally what happened to me. And so dang.
- [41:31]
B
How long did that second time period last for you? Of just like. Because I. That what, you guys got arrested and when.
- [41:41]
A
2020. I want to say 2020.
- [41:45]
B
Okay.
- [41:45]
A
May of 2020.
- [41:46]
B
So then the second time period back.
- [41:48]
A
Around was this was like going into. Yeah, into 2021. Up until literally this last year, bro.
- [41:55]
B
Dang. Yeah, so, wow. So that. That period lasted almost five years.
- [42:00]
A
Yeah.
- [42:01]
B
So I moved to LA in 2022. Into 2022.
- [42:07]
A
Wow.
- [42:07]
B
So we started the Bible study.
- [42:10]
A
Yeah, that first one I went to.
- [42:11]
B
October, which we just said. We're throwing shout outs to teachers, but big shout out to Warren Lance.
- [42:18]
A
Yes. Wow.
- [42:19]
B
Warren Lentz is one of my favorite human beings on the planet.
- [42:21]
A
I hope he sees this, man. I actually haven't talked to him in a minute. He got married and I think he lives in Ohio now still. But yeah, what a guy. Dude.
- [42:28]
B
He is like, Warren Lentz is like the best ever. And his wife Kayla's. They're incredible. But we started this Bible study in la. And I just moved to la. Well, actually, I didn't start it. I don't know if you know this.
- [42:43]
A
Yeah, Chelsea.
- [42:44]
B
Chelsea and Gabe. Yeah, started it. And that night Gabe, like, came up to me. I was just there, like to hang and he. He was like, I'm trying to, like, meet friends. I'd been in LA for like, not even a month, I don't think. And he was like, dude, I need you to preach. And you preach. We don't have anyone to preach. So I preached and you'd showed up that night. Warren brought you. That's why we're giving a shout out. Warren. And that's where we initially met.
- [43:10]
A
Yeah.
- [43:13]
B
But I think that was the only time we had seen each other.
- [43:15]
A
Yeah, I think it was. And I was deep in it at that time. I did not want to go again, shout out Warren, because I only went because he wanted me to. The thing was, when you understand, when you come to know Christ. Right. Something that I was very unaware of in most my life, which I should have been, is how much more life is spirit than it is tangible. It's so much more spirit than it is tangible. And a lot of things you're struggling with aren't because there's something wrong with you and your physical. It's because there's like a spiritual battle you're going through, you know? And so when I was around all these people, you know, when you're around certain people and they could say nothing but you feel like they're judging you or you feel like you're naked or something.
- [43:54]
B
Yeah.
- [43:55]
A
That is the spiritual battle you're going through is, is, is. Is feeling rejected even though nothing else is going on. And so when I was in those settings, I didn't want to be around them because that's how the devil was making me feel, you know? Yeah. And this happened a lot with people like Gabe, with so many other people in my life, with people like Curtis, you know, I couldn't stand being around them because it was like when you are a light, it shines light on darkness, you know? And the reality is, is most. If you're actually walking in the light, you're walking in love, bro. And if you would actually take the moment to talk to someone in the darkness, they would feel that love. It's the kindness of the Holy Spirit that leads people to print it, to repentance, you know, so. But that's, that's how the devil gets you, bro. He confuses you and he makes you think that it's your own thoughts, right? This is something that was big in my whole journey was I thought I knew everything, bro. Even the things I didn't know, I thought I didn't know them. If that makes sense. Like I was so enriched in like, if I had a thought come into my head, it's because I was thinking it. But I'm like, where do you think those thoughts come from, bro? And this is something God's been really showing me over these past few months because of the clarity and the sound mind that I have so been gracefully been given. And I just really wish that for everyone watching, like even though I'm telling this whole long story, I'm. The main point of all this is the redemption and where I'm at now, you know? And like, dude, I have done nothing for myself to get me to this point. Nothing. The only thing I did was meet the truth. I didn't figure out the truth. I met him. You know. And anyway, we'll get to that. But.
- [45:23]
B
Well, I think what you said is so important and it's.
- [45:26]
A
It.
- [45:27]
B
I can even think of it like this happens whether we interact with people or, you know, it can even be the temptation of if you screw up, hiding it inside and feeling like whenever you spend time around people that love Jesus and you don't love Jesus, that feeling of light exposing the darkness within you. Satan convinces you that they hate you.
- [45:53]
A
Yeah, absolutely.
- [45:54]
B
Because they have something that you don't have.
- [45:56]
A
100 but I love what you said.
- [45:58]
B
Spot on. It's like they're walking in love and really they're loving you. If. If they're actually sincerely, they love Jesus and they follow, you know, because there's always going to be the people that like claim Jesus, but they're really mean.
- [46:08]
A
Yeah, absolutely.
- [46:10]
B
But you're talking like someone that actually loves Jesus, has sincere faith in him, is just going to love the living snot out of you.
- [46:16]
A
Yeah, absolutely. Actually more so. I've always loved people. And when I gave my life to Christ, I've seen a lot of people on my comments, like when I started talking about it. Obviously people have firm opinions, but even then God showed me that's not them. It's. It's where they're at in their spiritual journey that has that opinion. Anyway, that's a different topic. But so you.
- [46:32]
B
We've. I love it. I love how you were shifting that perspective too. You were like, it's all about the redemption. We've talked a lot about the. I was depressed. I had this, I had that. I Got arrested. I was doing, you know, drug, sex, alcohol, you name it. When did all this change? And what was your turning point to go all in for Jesus?
- [46:54]
A
Well, it's kind of twofold. My best friend Cooper, bless his heart, bro, like, that was my soulmate, dog. He passed away a few years ago, dude. It's crazy. It's been that long. Who is also really struggling with a drug addiction. And he got poisoned by fentanyl on his way to a Bible study, actually, with Gabe and Frankie, which is so gnarly, dude. Yeah. Really crazy story. And so after that, dude, I turned. I thought I had done drugs before, but I had not. Like, I started doing, like. And all these sands, like, knowing they were pressed and just, like, doing them anyway. Like, I was deep in it. Like, my sex addiction got even crazier. And it's so funny, like, you say sex addiction, and people are like, oh, that's bad. But I'm like, it was just me having sex, and that's what's so pushed in life. So normal to everyone. You know what I mean? It's your body. You know what I mean? It's like, why wouldn't you do that? And honestly, I understand. If you don't know Jesus, I understand. Why wouldn't you? You know what I mean? That's kind of what God showed me. This whole thing is there's no expectation for the unbeliever, you know, even miracles. Miracles are miracles for the unbeliever, for the believer, it's just expecting to God, do what he promises us, you know what I mean? And to. To work how he promises us. It's like a shift in perspective. So, like, as I'm saying all this, dude, my favorite part is that God gave me such a time, and he kept me safe. There's a. There's a psalm that talks about, I kept you while you were sleeping. You know what I mean? But it's time to wake up, essentially, is what it's saying in Psalm 3. And so that was me, bro. He sustained me. That's the word that it uses in the scripture. He sustained me in my sleep, and that's. That's what I was. He sustained me throughout all this, which he didn't have to. This is the glorious mercy of God, dude. I can't even express to you guys, like, he did not have to save me, but he did. So after Cooper died, I turned my heart off completely. I was like, I don't want it. I don't want God. I don't want anything. And then Charlie Kerr got assassinated, bro. And everyone watching, bro, listen with your heart before you listen with your mind, all right? I had no idea, really, about him or anything. I grew up in the south, so I had a lot of resentment towards the Republican Party. And I came out to LA and I had a lot of feelings about the Democratic Party. I feel like both. Both are able to be lost, let's just say that. And so what I noticed when Charlie Kirk got assassinated was signal went off of my heart, bro, this brokenheartedness. And I had experienced that with a lot of other tragedy in my life. Like I just said with Cooper. It was like that same feeling I had with Cooper. And the other thing that was really surprising to me was the split difference between other people that were really stoked about the moment. And this really scared me, bro. 1, because I'd never seen something like that happen previously in my life with other tragedies, you know, and that split difference when I. When he. When he got assassinated, I heard, what time do you have left? That's what I heard in my head. At what time do you have left? And funny enough, bro, during this whole time of my life, I was still proclaiming God. I was like, God, you know, God. And this is the. Paul talks about this, like, no matter how the gospel's preached, like, God can use it, you know, whether it's in vain or whatever. I think that's a big part of my story because there's a lot of people that have come up to me and they're like, bro, I found God because I listened to your music. And I was like, are you sure? You know what I mean? Like, there's no way. But God uses everything. And I was saying, God loves you for who you are. I was saying, God, God, God got this, God that. But I was obviously living like I didn't know him. And because I didn't. And I heard, what time do you have left? What time do you have left? And this started to scare me, and I started getting a lot of fear about dying. I couldn't stop thinking about it, bro. I started getting a lot of anxiety, and I was like, well, this is crazy. That's not from the Lord. Like, the Lord doesn't give you anxiety. So I. I was actually just reading Philippians this morning, Philippians 4. And it talks about this thing, you know, the. The Lord does not give you anxiety, right? He doesn't give you fear, right? There's a reverence for the Lord, which they mentioned, his fear. But fear and anxiety are straight from the Devil and, like, the demonic. And so I started praying, started going in my backyard. I talk a lot, obviously. And so I'm like, in my backyard, voice memoing, praying, feel nothing. Started reading scripture, felt nothing. Angry, bro. I was angry and started reading scripture, and I was like, this is it. Started freaking me out even more. And so I started talking to a few people in my life. And then I hit you up, bro, and I DM'd you. I was like, Bro, something led me to DM Bryce. And I was like, can we please talk? And so he was very willing and open. And then I called him. We FaceTimed him and that dude. Literally, our conversation. I was in my backyard, and I told you kind of my situation. And you said very plainly. I don't even know if you remember, but you said, have you ever asked Jesus to reveal himself to you? And in the moment on the phone, I was like, yeah, bro, I just told you that I grew up in the church, you know, I just told you all this stuff, like. And you're like, okay, you know, just. Just. Just, like, lead with that. So I hung up the phone, bro, and my heart dropped. And it was like, I heard you've never asked to meet me. And immediately, bro, I went in my bedroom and I didn't even know. I was so lost in everything. And I grew up in the church. I had all this knowledge, but I was so lost, I had no idea what to do. And so I sat at the edge of my bed, the exact place. The exact opposite of the place that I felt like Jesus would meet me. The place I defiled myself and didn't honor God ever. It was a place of, like, sexual worship more than anything in my life. And I turned on worship. And I did. I just started. I was at the end of my rope. I think this is the. This. This is the important part. I've talked to a few people where they talk about wanting to meet God, and I. And I would ask them in love, do you really? You know, do you really? Because it's obvious when you're at the end of your rope, and it's obvious when you have a desperation in your spirit, you know? And the only time the Lord is ever in a hurry in the Bible is in the story of the Prodigal son. It's talking about Jesus and the Father and talking about us and the Father. And when the prodigal son goes and he lives his life, and he's so embarrassed, he's so scared to come back home, and he starts coming back home and it says, the Father sees him in a distance and he starts sprinting towards him. This is the only time Jesus is in a hurry. I love the painting of Michelangelo with Adam. The hand of God and the hand of Adam. If you look, Adam's hand is limp and the hand of God is reaching for it. All it takes is a limp hand reach to God. In fact, I think that's when he meets you the most. It says the Lord loves a broken heart in scripture. And, and so I think this is where I was at, bro. I had a broken heart. And before I say any of this, dude, the year before, just to clarify with people, my life got better. I became a better man. I got better friends, more diligent, hard working. Everything in life I had got better. I stopped doing drugs, I stopped doing sex. I actually went celibate like four or five, six months before I, I gave my life to the Lord. And it still wasn't the answer. These things you do with your hands are not the answer. The answer is a person. It's Jesus. And so when I was at the edge of my bed, I started crying out, feeling silly. I wasn't even really praying. I was literally just like talking and kind of like begging out loud. I was like, jesus, you have to meet me. I can't do this anymore. I have to have an undeniable experience. I kept saying that over and I said, jesus, I have to feel the fire. I have to, I'm, I'm going to convince myself that this isn't real. If it's not undeniable. I know myself. I'm too smart. That's what I was telling myself. I'm too smart. And for about five to 10 minutes I was doing this. And no lie, bro, In a way I've never experienced in my life, the presence of Jesus Christ, the son of man, came into my bedroom. My head was down, my body was slumped at the edge of my bed. It was like my skin was blended with the air. Every breath I took was the first one. And I was in this reverence, this holy. I can't explain the holy presence, right? I didn't see him, but I, I, I didn't want to. I didn't want to look, dude, that's how holy it was. Like, I, and the best way I can put into words was literally in the presence of Jesus. Not just the Holy Spirit, the presence of Jesus, the Holy Spirit was filled, put inside of me in that moment and has carried on. But, and I remember I just kept saying, yeshua, Yeshua, like butter off of my lips, bro. And I was in the midst of an experience I didn't think was possible my whole life. And in that moment, he showed me for about 30 seconds I had the most intense fear I had ever been given. And like I said, the Lord the God doesn't give you fear in your day to day life, but he does show you what you are without him. And for 30 seconds, he showed me how separated I was my entire life. And I think you mentioned something like this before, but it literally was like my hand was on the doorknob of heaven. And if I died right there, he would have said, depart from me. I never knew you. And I would have said, lord, Lord, I knew. I went to church. I did all these things my whole life. And in that moment, he covered me in grace, bro. Grace. For the first time in my life, I felt grace. A tangible grace from the top of my head to the soles of my feet. He showed me how he saw me, bro. And Bryce, it wasn't. He was proud of me. He was proud of every mistake I ever made. He was proud of the before, during, and after. He was proud. It was all wrapped up in his love. There wasn't a moment that he wasn't proud of me. It didn't make any sense to me. When he looked at me, I. It was like. It was like as if the. Like God was looking at Jesus. It was so pure. There was. There wasn't a spot on me that he didn't love, right? And so I experienced all this. My bedroom. And in that moment, I gave my life to the Lord. And I was alone, bro, in my bedroom. And I think that was an important part because I think we can trick ourselves. And the scripture says the heart is more deceiving above all else. Mine definitely is. And I think sometimes we need things to happen around us to convince us of what's going on. But the biggest transition and transformation happens on the inside, and you get a new spirit. In that moment. I had a spiritual exchange, something like I never experienced before, bro. I grew up in the church. I got baptized five times. Growing up, like, I kept doing it thinking this is the one. I would go have the high and it would fall off, right? And so I say this because the next two weeks of my life, this is give. To give encouragement to people. In their journey with faith. I met Jesus. The next week was the hardest week of my entire life. I made more mistakes than I had in the previous, like, two months, bro. I fell and I fell hard and There was a part of me that the lies from the devil were like, oh, see, it wasn't real. But the difference was, bro, instead of drawing me further away from God, it brought me closer to God. That grace that I talked about in that moment, Hit me again. Hit me again. He said, jaden, I love you. Remember you met me. You didn't figure this out. You met me. And he kept taking me back to this moment over and over again. And I keep talking about this word envelop, right? Comes from within. And it envelops. And over the next few months, bro, the further I got away in time, the closer he brought me back to that moment. Wow. And I kept smoking weed and drinking for like, the first two months that I gave my life to Christ. But God never made me feel bad about it ever once. I never felt guilty. But what he did do, and he was like, jaden, can you hear me? Can you hear me when you're smoking? Can you hear me when you're drinking? Can you be kind to this person without a doubt while you're drinking? And it started convicting me. And conviction isn't the repulsion of sin. It's the attraction of the Holy Spirit. You know what I mean? It pulls you towards Him. It doesn't tell you how you're wrong. It shows you how he's right. That's what conviction is.
- [58:35]
B
Yeah, that's good.
- [58:36]
A
And so that's what it did for me. And I started. Dude, these revelations that I. I thought I knew my whole life were completely flipped upside down and presented to me in grace and love. The love, the love I thought I had for my friends doubled, tripled, quadrupled, bro. Like, I. I loved people that were outside of Christ more than I ever had. My curiosity to the scripture I told you got made me angry. I started reading and it started applying to me because it was written to me, right? It was. It was. It was significant and personal. And I started to want to know more. It wasn't just, what am I reading on this verse? I'm like, who wrote this verse? Why are they writing it? Where are they writing it from? And when I was praying, I wasn't just praying out loud. I was praying to someone. The Holy Spirit inside of me started to rise up. I had a few moments of obedience that it was so obvious. If you're asking, how do I know if God's asking me to obey? If you. You know, because you don't want to do it, right? And there's a few moments like that for me and There was this one big one where I, I obeyed. Even though I knew it wasn't going to work out for me in the flesh, in the world. I actually got in trouble in the world by, from a few people around me because what, what, what, what obedience to the Lord looks like to people who may not understand? It looks like disobedience to the world and it looks like irresponsibility sometimes, right? And so this is what was happening for me. And in that moment that I obeyed, this really big moment for me, I was crying out to God after. I felt like my life got worse after this moment. And my spirit, that was a baby at this point, got catapulted to a new level of relationship with the Lord. And the Lord told me, jaden, the gift for obeying me isn't a better life. It's more me. That's so good.
- [60:15]
B
That's what Jesus says. Yes, blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
- [60:19]
A
Absolutely.
- [60:19]
B
If you're honest with God, you get more of him. That's like the whole. And I love that because it's like finally you're, and, and you, you even. Do you like unintentionally said it as you've progressively told your testimony of what God's done in your life? It's, oh yeah, when I finally got honest with God, yeah, then he met me. But it wasn't that he wasn't willing to see me, it's just he, he did want to see me. He just can't move in a dishonest heart. He needs someone to be open and honest and real.
- [60:47]
A
And he has, he has to, you have to be able to hear his voice. And this is for everyone listening, bro. I was, I was back home seeing my nephew, bro, he's the cutest thing in the entire world. Fight me on it. But, and he's like three months old, dude. And my sister sitting there talking to him. And my brother in law comes in, he goes, charlie, that's his name. And Charlie looks up at him and I was like, I looked at my sister, I was like, that's crazy, bro. He knows his voice. And my sister goes, it's not that crazy. He was talking to him the entire time he was in the womb. And the Lord hit me and he told me, jaden, I've been speaking to you and, and using you the entire time you were in the womb. But now you know my voice because you've been birthed in me again. And this is what's happening to you in your life as you're watching right now whether you know the Lord or don't know the Lord, but if you don't know the Lord, he is speaking to you. And when you come into congruence and your spirit becomes his spirit, you are going to start to notice things that God's been doing in your life since before. He's not waiting to change your life now. He's been changing your life since the moment you were born, since before you were born. And it's all leading you up to the moment where you meet Christ and you have this moment with Him. And I highlight Christ because Christ is the only way we get to the Father. And in the same way it's the only way the Father sees us is through Christ. That's how he sees you. Like perfect, blemishless, blameless, covered in the blood. That's how he sees you already. And so this, this fear that the devil wants to put on you is that you have to prepare yourself and get yourself ready. No, the only thing you have to do is let go of what you think you are and let God tell you who, how you actually are and how he sees you. And so this has turned into, dude, I also thought that God was going to change my personality and dude, no, he gave me my personality back, bro. He, I. And this, I'm going to use this vernacular specifically. Like there's negative connotations maybe with this word, but like addiction, right? I'm an addict, right? I'm obsessive, I'm extreme, all these things. I'm like, oh, well, God's gonna change that. And then one of the first things he showed me was 1st Timothy 1:7. For the Spirit of God does not make us timid, but gives us power and self discipline. What God did is he didn't take my personality and change it. He gave my personality its original purpose. I'm still an addict, but I'm an addict to the Lord. I'm still obsessive, I'm still extreme, but I'm extreme about my faith and about the love that I give other people, you know, he didn't change anything about me. In fact, he gave me what I was supposed to be in the beginning that, that I've been trying to do on my own, you know, and all of this, like, literally, I can't stress enough, I did not do that is the most fascinating part to me. I think one thing I do have because of my extremities is I have faith, bro. I had faith in myself before I knew Christ, you know, and that Faith just turned into faith to an eternal God and a God that loves bro. And his love isn't weak. God is going to shed things off of you 100 when you come into contact with him, but it's exactly what you've been looking for. The answers you've been looking for aren't coming in a form of what you do. It comes in a person. And when you come in contact with that person, you start to look like him, and he just starts to melt these things off of you that you thought you needed or maybe you didn't want this whole time. And he takes it from you and he puts it in a place that can't reach you anymore, and you start walking. This authority. And, bro, it has been the coolest thing that's ever happened to me in my entire life. I'm so grateful God did not have to save me. I really believe that he honored the prayers of multiple people in my life. My mom, bro, My mom prayed for me for so many years, dude, and I used to hate it. I used to hate how fervent she was about putting me at the feet of Jesus. And, bro, I am so grateful. There's. There's nothing. I would give up everything, literally everything in my entire life. I. I have so many more stories about the things that I've gotten to be a part of and people I've met and the money I've had and all this stuff. I would give up everything, every single thing to experience what I experienced in my bedroom and to live the way that God has allowed me to live now. Everything.
- [64:43]
B
Well, the same way that your mom put you at the feet of Jesus, I would love for you to close this out by putting everyone watching and listening at the feet of Jesus. I would love for you to pray for everyone.
- [64:54]
A
Absolutely.
- [64:54]
B
Watching and listening.
- [64:56]
A
100. And before I pray, bro, I mean, thank you, bro, for having me. Thank you for what you do, dog. I mean, obviously, like, you're so young. You're someone I looked up to despite your age, bro.
- [65:09]
B
You.
- [65:09]
A
You were such a key part of bringing me to the feet of Jesus. But there's also a lot of pressure that comes with that. Dude. I understand, like, not even just in the highlight, in the fame that you have acquired that the Lord has given you, but the spiritual pressure, too. You know what I mean? And you are blessed not because of what you do, but because of who you are. And the Lord is so proud of you, and he's so grateful for you, and he has no expectation from you. And so I Just want to honor you. And I hope everyone watching, as much as you look up to Bryce, understand that he's human and he's, he's young. He's 21, right? Two. 22, baby. It's a good year.
- [65:46]
B
Golden year.
- [65:46]
A
And he's not ank yet, but. So. Yeah. Love you. Not for a long time, man.
- [65:53]
B
Thank you for saying that.
- [65:54]
A
No problem. That was kind.
- [65:55]
B
Thank you.
- [65:55]
A
Absolutely. Lord Jesus, I'm so grateful that you get to use someone like me. If you've known me and you're watching this, you can understand that a little bit more than others. But if you don't just understand that I was a broken human living in death. And Jesus, you brought me into life. You didn't take me from wrong to right, you took me from death to life. And so as the viewer is listening right now, Lord, I pray that you cover them in a grace first and foremost and a forgiveness and a love that encompasses all their sin. That they are not defined by their sin, but they're actually defined by the blood that paid for it. Lord, I pray that you will meet them in an intimate way, that the Holy Spirit will guide them to a moment where they fall at your feet. Lord Jesus, humble and at the end of their rope. That they know everything that they'd be feeling if they have a stirring up in their spirit during this conversation, that it is no coincidence that is the Holy Spirit moving on them, that you want to bring them into a life that was meant and designed for them before the foundation of the world. Or we come against any lies of the enemy, any destruction that is coming in their life, things that do not make sense. Lord, let them be highlighted and let them be understood and let a sound mind come over their mind. And let there be a peace that goes with them in this journey that they're going to have moving forward closer to you. Lord says draw near to you and you will draw near to them. You will draw near to us. And so I pray that that is happening right now, right now, Lord Jesus, that this is not a religion based thing. This is a transformation life eternal life thing. The King of the universe is not just a king, but he's a father. And he wants his children to spend time with him and he wants to live in eternity with his children. You have a purpose to the viewer. You have such a heart that was crafted by God and he loves you so much. He wants to help you, he wants to save you. He's Savior first and foremost. He wants to walk with you. He doesn't want to tell you where to walk without him. He wants to walk with you. He wants to be there holding you up. So, God, I just pray that you can impact these people. I love that we get to do this through a screen, through microphones. That's how powerful you are, God. That we get to use our voice and call upon your name. And it starts to move mountains, Lord Jesus. And by the mountains, I mean the mountains inside of our heart. That eternal hole that exists can only be filled by an eternal God. And so I pray that not by my words, not by Bryce's words, but that something throughout this podcast just reaches somebody. And we love you so much, and we thank you. And you're miraculous. You're matchless. In your merciful name, Jesus, Amen. Amen.