The Burden: Get the Money and Run | The Hunter (Season 4, Episode 3)

Podcast: The Burden
Host: Orbit Media (Ben Adair, Steve Fishman)
Guests: Joe Loya, Joe Loya Sr.
Date: May 13, 2025

Overview

In episode three, "The Hunter", the focus tightens on a pivotal traumatic event from Joe Loya's youth—his violent confrontation with his father—which shaped his worldview and set him on the path to becoming Southern California’s most prolific bank robber. The episode unpacks the nightmarish home life Joe and his brother endured, the climactic incident in which Joe attempted to kill his father, and the psychological aftermath for both men. Honest, raw, and unflinching, the storytelling traverses Joe's childhood pain and rage, the mechanisms of survival, and the long shadow of family violence.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Anatomy of a Bank Robbery

• Valencia, California: Joe describes his method and mindset during a robbery, revealing psychological tricks he used to become “invisible” in plain sight.
• (03:00-05:36)
  • Joe's process: Choosing locations, blending in rather than making grand escapes.
  • Misconceptions by witnesses: Bank tellers and customers bought into TV tropes, expecting a fleeing robber, not a calm figure slipping into the crowd.
  • Quote:

    "I was invisible. I was looking right at them, and I might as well have been a fucking ghost because they could not see me." – Joe Loya (04:29)

2. Disclosure of Abuse and An Escalation

• Aftermath of Telling the Truth: At a Sizzler, Joe confides in his father’s girlfriend about the abuse he and his brother Paul suffered.
• Recounts handing her a steak knife, promising to stab his father if hit again—planting a grim seed in his own mind.
• (05:36–08:13)
  • Her shock and inability to conceal emotions puts Joe on edge; he now fears the secret will leak.
  • Leads to increased tension at home, culminating in a mistake at the laundromat and another burst of violence.

3. The Night Violence Came to a Head

• The Confrontation: Joe’s father learns of the boys’ revelations and reacts with calculated anger and brutality.
• Joe’s narration is intense, reliving the event blow by blow, describing his fear, confusion, and the adrenaline-fueled decision to arm himself.
• The Act: When his father threatens him with a weight bar, Joe seizes the moment, retrieves a knife, and stabs his father.
• (09:56–15:58)
  • Joe’s focus on his own mindset—"fugue state," hypervigilance, tallying the threat level.
  • His manner is matter-of-fact, but the story is harrowing:
    Quote:

    "I stand up and I look at him and he’s like, oh shit...I stab him in the back...next to his spinal cord in his neck, and I start twisting to try and break it off. And he’s like, ah, you killed me. You killed me.” – Joe Loya (13:17)

4. Aftermath: Police, Trauma, and Revelation

• At the Police Station: Joe describes a heady rush of power—comparing himself to a “badass” killer in a movie—and a swift reality check when police suspect him of premeditation.

• (18:13–21:44)

  • Police suspicion and interrogation highlight how systems often fail to see abused children as victims.
  • Joe’s self analysis begins:

    “For a moment I thought my dad was dead. I killed him. That was a different power...the reason you're alive is because right now I choose to not kill you.” – Joe Loya (19:21)

• Medical Intervention: Hospitalization reveals extensive injuries—concussion, fractures—which clarifies the abuse for authorities; charges shift from attempted murder to self-defense.

5. Joe Sr.'s Perspective and The Wounds of Regret

• Joe Sr. recounts his emotional response—shock, regret, and belated clarity—upon realizing the consequences of his violence and the depth of the family rift.
• (24:53–34:23)
  • Profoundly honest interview with Joe Sr.:
    Quote:

    “He didn’t stab me. I put that knife in his hand and told him to do it. How could he trust me?...I’m the culprit here, not him. And I take full responsibility for that.” – Joe Loya Sr. (29:44)

  • He reflects on the necessity of changing, embracing responsibility, and the slow work of repairing the relationship.

6. The Aftermath at Home

• Joe and Paul leave home; Paul eventually joins the military, Joe drifts into crime.

• Attempts at reconciliation are complicated but persistent, with Joe Sr. changing his parenting but the effects of trauma lingering.

• (32:27–35:57)

• Joe on Taking Responsibility:
  Quote:

  "I never blame my dad for what I did at all. None of my crimes. I say dad, when you punch me in the mouth. You did alter my imagination about how effective violence could be. You did do that. But I don't blame him for whatever I did. I just never do—feels weak." – Joe Loya (34:33)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Bank Robbery Camouflage:

  “I was invisible. I was looking right at them, and I might as well have been a fucking ghost because they could not see me.”
  (Joe Loya, 04:29)

• On Surviving Parental Abuse:

  “I said I would stab him next time. And that’s what I latch onto in all of that. ... This is what you do. You declared it, let’s rock it.”
  (Joe Loya, 11:00)

• On the Aftermath & Power:

  “I can start looking at this cop like you’re a fucking piece of shit for backing my dad’s play... maybe even starting this at the beginning of like, oh, you’re authority figure. Fuck you.”
  (Joe Loya, 20:52)

• On Regret and Responsibility (Joe Sr.):

  “He didn’t stab me. I put that knife in his hand and told him to do it...I’m the culprit here, not him. And I take full responsibility for that.”
  (Joe Loya Sr., 29:44)

• On the Path Forward:

  “This thing that was awakened in me...I tried to kill that man that day...this was the thing that put me on the path. Trying to murder my father, this was the thing that put me on the path.”
  (Joe Loya, 35:44)

Timeline of Important Segments (Timestamps)

| Timestamp | Topic/Segment | |--------------|-------------------------------------------------| | 02:43 | Joe narrates Valencia bank robbery | | 05:36 | Disclosure of abuse; knife promise at Sizzler | | 09:56 | The violent confrontation and stabbing | | 13:17 | Joe’s detailed account of stabbing his father | | 18:13 | Interrogation at the police station | | 24:53 | Joe Sr. discusses the scar and his regret | | 32:27 | Brothers leave home and try to move on | | 34:33 | Joe’s reflection on crime, violence, and blame | | 35:44 | Joe connects the act to his future path |

Tone & Storytelling

The episode is intensely personal, with interviews and narration by both Joe Loya and his father that oscillate between regret, anger, and dark humor. Joe’s recounting is raw and unsparing, while Joe Sr. offers plainspoken contrition and insight into the legacy of family violence. Host Ben Adair and producer Steve Fishman frame the story with clear-eyed context, letting Joe's words—and scars—speak for themselves.

Summary

“The Hunter” pulls no punches, laying bare the origins of a notorious criminal’s psyche against a backdrop of family trauma, violence, and fractured redemption. Through wrenching storytelling and unscripted emotion, it explores not just why someone runs, but what they’re trying, desperately, to escape.