← Everything Is Energy with Cathy Heller
Everything Is Energy with Cathy Heller
Breaking the Groundhog Day Loop: How Peace Becomes Your Power
00:31:11
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- [00:00]
Kathy Heller
2026 is not asking you to set yet another goal. It's asking you who are you finally willing to be. What we're doing here is the part that most people avoid the decision. The part where you stop pushing your real life to someday and realize that it's now. I just led an intention setting workshop all about raising your standards. About committing to what you're available for this year and what you're not available for. No more vague promises, no more dragging old patterns into a new calendar year. In this one hour workshop, I'm going to help you choose a clear embodied intention for your year, understand why past intentions never stick, set standards that you're actually going to keep, get honest about what you're no longer available for, and learn how to follow through all year without forcing. This is not just motivation, it's actually recalibration. This is the kind of workshop where your energy cleans up, your boundaries solidify and you stop negotiating with your true self. You don't need another sign. You don't need to keep waiting for something. You don't need to keep postponing the life that's calling you. It's time. It's time to step into the life that's always been yours. You can watch the full replay of this intention setting workshop@kathyheller.com replay this one hour will change 2026 for the better.
- [01:22]
Hey guys, it's Kathy. I want to share a fun bonus episode from my 14 day reset challenge. I'm going live every morning from now until January 14th to lead you through powerful daily practices that will help you create grounded mornings and set new standards that actually stick. Because if you don't arrive at your own life in the morning, someone else will decide the tone of your day for you. So let's make this year about coming home to yourself every single morning. And when you meet yourself first, everything changes. Your nervous system calms, your clarity sharpens. Your life starts responding to you differently. Let's make this the year you stop waking up embracing for life and start waking up and choosing it. So if you want in, come join us@kathyheller.com 20:26 alright, here's the episode.
- [02:12]
Good morning everybody. Welcome back. It is day two. It is January 2nd and my first question for you today. I want to just invite us all in to really arrive in this moment. What would it feel like not to rush today? That's my first question. What would it feel like to just soften? What would it feel like to set down the urgency? I want you to take out a pen and paper. And I want you to reflect on the standard that I'm setting in front of you, which is a word that you're. You're saying in the chat right now, which is peace. What if peace was your standard? Yesterday I said that peace. This year, it's not that peace is a reward at the end of the day that you get a moment of peace, but peace is a prerequisite. And I brought some props. Today I'm going to be like Mr. Rogers when he took out his little brown paper bag and shop showed some cute things. We're going to do a mindfulness practice together. But what if. Just what if, for the first time in your life, what made this year monumentally different is that your standard was peace and that your morning began that way and your days end that way, and that you're committed to that. Because when the world within you changes, the world around you changes. And we've all seen. Oh, and if you haven't seen it in a while, I highly recommend watching it. Even watch it with your kids. The movie Groundhog Day with Bill Murray. And it's such a good movie. Like, he's so adorable, and the movie is funny. And it's also. How true is it? Right? He wakes up, same song, same. You know, he trips over the same little. It's a doozy. The little crack in the. In the cement. Has the same conversations. And even though the calendar has just changed and, you know, I had. I had to do it today, I was writing something, I was like, oh, it's actually 2026. The calendar has changed. But has everything changed just because the calendar's changed? No. Right. And so I think that if you look back at your life, there have definitely been milestones and things that have changed and ways that you have changed. And we are going to talk about that in a moment. But there are so many ways where things feel like it is a little bit of Groundhog Day. Now, what is that about? What that is, is when you wake up in the morning, within three to four seconds of waking up, you have a familiar thought pattern. You think the way you thought yesterday, which means you feel the way you felt yesterday, which means you're going to behave the way you behaved yesterday. And then what? You're going to pretty much relive the exact same day. And so we're going to do a practice today that I think can be really helpful. But what I want you to understand is there's nothing wrong with you. This is the way the mind Works the mind. Just like if you were ever to wear Birkenstocks, you know how those sandals, like, form to your foot? And if you were to borrow your friend's Birkenstocks, even if they're the exact same size shoe, they won't feel good on your feet because they've sort of molded to your friend's foot and the way that she walks and her gait, Right? And so your mind has these neuropathways which basically fire and wire the same thoughts and the same feelings, which creates the same cocktail in the mind. So I want to show you today, and some of you have done this with me before, but I think it's a really helpful exercise. So I'm going to be like, what was that science show? Mr. Wizard? Did anyone have Nickelodeon when you were growing up? Okay, science. So this is a bowl, and it has just water in it. Now I'm just putting it on the table in front of me, and I'm picking up baking soda. Okay? So funny enough, I'm not sponsored by baking soda. Can you imagine? I was like, okay, guys, I'll go. Yeah, can you imagine? Anyways, so this morning, I actually did an instacart run for them to bring me baking soda. And my daughter's like, mom, we have, like, nine unopened things of baking soda. Like, oh, my God, you can never have enough, clearly. I'm just gonna. You get baking soda. You get baking soda. I'm gonna send it. Okay, the lucky winners today. Esgy, you can send people. I'm just kidding. Who wants baking soda? But anyway, today, baking soda. So I'm gonna take this baking soda and I'm gonna pour it into the bowl. Now, what happens to the water when I pour in the baking soda? Okay, just play with me here. I know. It's so obvious. It gets cloudy. Exactly. So you get this, like, cloudy water. Okay. And. And now can you see through it? No, because it's foggy. Right, but what happens if I just sit here for a minute? Put your hand on your belly. We're just going to breathe for a moment and just observe. Okay. And you just feel your breath go in and out as you're observing. And what's happening to the water. And what's happening to the water is as the. As the baking soda settles, it all goes to the bottom. Do you see that? It all settles to the bottom. And now the water is actually clear again. Okay. So when you wake up in the morning, before you open your eyes. Okay, you know, kabbalistically, we say that when you dream, your soul actually has a conversation with God, right? You actually get to see the whole multi dimensional universe when you're sleeping. And that's why you can have visits. You can have dreams. I. Sometimes my dad comes to me in dreams and it's like a real visit, you know? So you wake up in the morning and you actually have the capacity to see clearly. But within a few seconds of waking up your amygdala, your mind says, wait, I want to create what will feel safe for you. And the mind says that whatever is familiar is safety. So the mind starts to pour in. Okay, I'm just gonna go back here. So you can see how clear it is. So you wake up in the morning and you have the opportunity to see clearly. And within three to four seconds of opening your eyes, your mind orients you to what? To the present? No, it orients you to the past. Why? Because the past feels familiar and the past feels safe. So within three to four seconds, this is what happens. And you get all of these thoughts and the thoughts don't feel good. And then what starts to happen is you can't see clearly. And how do you think that feels in your body when those thoughts start pouring in? Maybe you want to even tell me how it felt today, but this is the Bill Murray. This is the Groundhog Day that we're talking about when we're referencing that movie, right? He wakes up in the morning, and what happens in the movie? That Sonny and Cher song starts to play. I've got you, babe. Is that the one, by the way, her new dj play my Christmas song. I'm like, dying for her. I'm like, is she ageless? Like, how is she? Her boyfriend's like 18. I'm like, you know what? You're Cher. You can do whatever you want. P.S. my, one of my favorite movies of all time is a Cher movie. It's called Moonstruck. If you haven't seen it, you're welcome. You should go watch that again. So, Bill, I don't know how I went from, oh, Sonny and Cher. I'm like, how did I go from Bill Murray to Cher, right? Because the song, he wakes up. So he wakes up and he hears that song, and his mind orients him to all this stuff. That's what happens to all of us, right? So what happens is you wake up in the morning and you've just had a conversation with God. Whether you know it or not. Your soul, you know, was just sort of traversing the universe. You were reminded of the infiniteness of your soul and this life and what's here and how majestic, right? But then your eyes open, okay? And your mind tells you all these stories about the past. It says, yeah, right. You think that's possible? It's not possible. You know what's possible? You're going to feel overwhelmed today. You know what's really possible? You're going to feel stressed out today. You know what's even more possible? People won't come through today. Oh, and don't forget though, it's a doggy dog world and people are out for themselves. And you know, don't forget the issue that you have with your mother in law. And don't forget this. And don't forget that. And you wake up and you're already pissed. You haven't even done anything. You wake up and within it's 11 seconds, it's already. It's already not. It's. What's the book that we all read in grade school? Alexander and the no Good. The. The very. How do you say it? Alexander and the no Good, Very Bad Day. Is that it? It's like nothing even has to happen. And you walk downstairs, you're already shouting at somebody because as soon as those thoughts pour in, your nervous system gets dysregulated. You can't see. You can't see when it's foggy. Right now you can see because it's settled a little bit, right? But when it's all foggy, there's cortisol, there's stress, all of that. So what I want you to start to consider, right, is that. That is the theta complete, okay? That is the way, the back of your brain, this amygdala, that's the way that it works. And so there's nothing wrong with you. There's nothing different about you. You're not broken. Okay, but that's the way that it works. So what if you anticipated that? Right? I was talking to my, my oldest daughter. She's 14, and I can't believe it, but she said to me, you know, mom, in a year I'm going to get my learner's permit. I'm like, is this really happening? This is insanity. So we were talking the other day about driving and I said, you know what good drivers do? What do good drivers do? Can someone tell me in the chat, what do good drivers do? Buckle up. Yes. No, but Karina and Maddie. Yes, exactly. You guys got it? Okay, so Esgy, pick three of these awesome people who said the word anticipate. Yeah, we anticipate. Right A good driver is anticipating. You know, somebody could come out from around this corner. So I'm going to anticipate that, and I'm going to go a little bit slow here, right? So same thing with. If you're. If you're a good basketball player, right? You're constantly anticipating. I love how I'm talking about basketball as if I've ever played ever. Let's say the answer is zero. I've not ever played in one basketball game. But I've heard the same thing about basketball players, that what makes them great, great basketball players are constantly anticipating what could happen where, right? So they're there before the ball's even there. They're already there. They're anticipating where the ball is going to go. So what if this year, in 2026, you decide this year is going to be different? Because I'm going to do two things. Number one, I'm going to anticipate it. I'm going to be ahead of you, right? It's like you're Gandalf on the bridge. You're like this today. Not today, Satan, right? Like, you don't pass today because you're going to anticipate it. You're not going to be caught off guard, right? You're going to say to yourself, kathy told me this information. I went and looked it up, right? It's true. My mind is set, okay? It's these Birkenstocks. I'm gonna get this old familiar thought pattern, right? And so before I wake up in the morning, I'm gonna know that my mind is full of s. I don't want to swear on this. I don't know why all of a sudden I'm like, I'm worried that there's children watching, as if this is like, you know, you bring children to this. I don't know, maybe they find it funny. The point is this. Your brain is a liar, okay? It's. It's mostly full of it. And so if you anticipate that, okay? And by the way, the reason that people love to do meditation is because when you meditate, you become the observer of your mind. You're not in the blizzard of the storm. You're not in the fog of the baking soda. You are observing it. And the more you observe it, it doesn't rule you because you get to select it. You get to decide. You get to opt in or not, right? It's a choice. So if you know ahead of time that you're going to anticipate, like that is going to happen. And Maybe, just maybe in 2026, what you're deciding is I just don't want it. Like, I'm not available to wake up every morning and I'm not available to go through the same familiar pattern of thoughts and of limited beliefs and of critical beliefs and of things that overwhelm me. Just so my consistent. My system gets right into that overdrive. Fight or flight. You are not available this year for that. You're just done. You've had it. You've absolutely had it. Yes. This is the breakthrough. This is the breakthrough, right? So this is where I keep relating to this funny movie of Groundhog Day. Because what happens is he gets to a point where he's so fed up, he is so sick of living the exact same day with the same conversations and the same exact moments. It's literally Groundhog Day. It's a copy paste of exactly the day he had the day before. And he gets to the point and he's like, I'm out. I'm out. And so what does he do? He pattern interrupts. He starts to do things differently. He starts to say things he's never said. He starts to make different choices. And all of a sudden, this is what's crazy. The world around him completely changes, right? And he's like, wait a minute. The world around me? That's the thing that's set, and that's what your mind tells you, is, are you kidding? You think you're going to have a better career this year? You're not. Look at your environment. Look at the evidence. Then your mind says, you think your relationship is going to change this year? No, it's not. Look at the evidence. Look at. Look what's around you. But what happens is when the world inside of you changes like that, the world around you changes. That is how it works. And so we have so much more power than we know. We are so much more powerful than our mind. But you know how the mind is like kryptonite. And so if you don't anticipate it and you wake up in the morning and you just let it run amok. It's like that baking soda in the water. It just puts you in a fog. It's like a spell. It is like a spell. And honestly, all of those thoughts that are so unhelpful, they come with a chemical. They're not just thoughts. They actually come with a chemical. And you know what that chemical is? Cortisol. And that is literally like being on a drug. Okay? It's like your mind drugs you. It Drugs, you. And all of a sudden you're like, I don't feel good. You're like, yeah, of course you don't feel good, right? And cortisol is more addictive than nicotine. And so we get addicted to feeling like crap. Isn't that insane? We get actually addicted to that familiar pattern. And then, you know what most people do? They're like, oh, well, I'll just scroll my phone. And now we have a dopamine addiction. So now we're just moving between cortisol and dopamine, and we're like, God, life is not good. It's like, no, it's not good. And guess nothing's even happened to justify that it's not good, other than living inside of the hell of these two chemicals, which is constant. Cortisol, dopamine, cortisol, dopamine, cortisol, dopamine. So let's do this again. Okay, so here's the good news. You get to exit this reality, okay? You get to exit the bookshop. You get to literally, you get to free yourself from all of this, okay? Now, by the way, we're going to talk more about calendars and the way things work, but this time of year, the reason Capricorn is such a good time of year, right? In the. In the lunar calendar, on the. On the Hebrew calendar, we call it Tevet. It's all about setting new habits. It's actually all about the discipline to set these habits. Why? Because the freedom, you know, when it comes in the spring, right? Passover, the freedom, the exodus. Why do people all of a sudden, in spring, they want to, like, you know, wear things that put the sun on their shoulders and clean out their closets, and it feels like freed. The freedom vibe is in the spring, okay? This. The freedom vibes are not right here in the middle of winter. Accept that. What allows you that freedom is setting the discipline right now to set those habits. Because if you start today to make your standard and make your habits such that your peace is your baseline, what do you think will happen by the time the spring breaks? You will be free. Does that make sense? That is the entire point, is that we are laying the groundwork so that you actually. Because it takes about 90 days, okay, for you to actually change by creating a new pattern, a new pat, a new habit. Well, you're gonna do that. And so what if this year, right, because people are like, what happens is the new year happens. The ball drops, you wake up, you feel a little different, and by noon, you've already gotten into the same conversation with your, you know, with your spouse, you have the same bad feeling come over you, and you see something on Instagram and you're like, forget it. Who am I kidding? Nothing is going to change this year, right? And then you look at the evidence of that and you say, forget it. I'm not even going to try, okay? And some people, they last a little longer, and they do that on January 17th. But the point that I'm making is instead of. Instead of buying into all of that, right? It doesn't happen overnight, okay? If you're boiling water, you put the water on the stove, it heats up, it doesn't boil instantly. We've all had this thing where you're, like, waiting for the thing to boil, and you're like, God, is this a long time? It's actually not that long of a time, but it does take a few minutes. And depending on how high the flame is, it could take four minutes, it could take eight minutes. But if you're thinking that it's immediately going to boil, it's not going to boil immediately. But if you let it keep doing its thing, the water gets hotter and hotter and hotter, and then it is going to boil like, it is going to boil. So if you set the habit in January, right, If you start to make the discipline to say, I'm going to anticipate this, I know that this is going to happen. She's not wrong. I know that my mind is going to think the way it thought yesterday, which means I'm going to feel what I felt yesterday, which means I'm going to see the same amount of opportunities based upon those limiting beliefs, which means I'm going to make the same choices, more or less, right? If you anticipate that and you say, no, I'm going to do things differently, which we're going to do a little bit of now. Then you're going to wake up in the morning and you're going to set a practice that your peace is your standard, and you're not going to just allow yourself to just be drowned out in the fog of the baking soda. So a couple things need to happen, okay? So first of all, this is a tough one. And I know it sounds like, of course I can do that. I would highly recommend that you do not pick up your phone for at least the first. If you could do an hour of your morning, that would be amazing. But if you can do even 30 minutes to 45 minutes, do not pick up your phone. Because the neuroscience suggests that whatever you see Right. Those feelings, the first 10 minutes of your day, however you feel you will, that'll be the dominant feeling for the rest of the day. And do really want that? Do you really want that? Your first 10 minutes of the day, you're looking at the news and you're like, okay, that is going to be the Xerox feeling that's dominant throughout the rest of my day. You get to opt out of that, right? You get to plug in instead to the wisdom within you that's real and actual. You get to plug in to listen to God. You get to plug into what's actually real in reality. You know how often people say, well, the reality is. I'm like, are you talking about reality with a capital R or a subjective reality? Because reality with a capital R is all things possible 100% of the time. And I'm going to tell you something right now, which you've probably heard me say. You can have whatever it is that you want as long as you're willing to set down the belief that you can't have it. And when you walk around with a mind that's full of that baking soda, what you're really saying all day is, gosh, I'm so frustrated because this is what I want, but these are all the reasons I'm going to litigate against myself. I can't have it, and here's why. I can't have it because of guilt. I can't have it because I'm not worthy. I can't have it because it's not even possible. I can't have it because I'm trying to create the how, even though that's God's business. I'm in God's business and I can't.
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Figure out the how.
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So it's not possible. So I can't have it. So what if you did two things. Number one, you anticipate. You anticipate that this is going to happen and you get ahead of it. You've already fast forwarded the Bill Murray Groundhog Day movie. You know how it goes. So you're going to do that now. You're going to pattern interrupt. So you are going to wake up and you can decide, right? What is it that I'm going to tell myself when I wake up that is going to remind me that I'm not going to get caught in the baking soda. So I can actually see clearly. I can actually see clearly that all things are possible all the time, right? And that is the amazing infiniteness of this infinite quantum field and the way that things are working and all of this is available to me. So I want you to take out a pen and paper, okay? And if peace is your standard, your non negotiable for 2026 is peace. I'm going to ask you two questions, okay? What behavior will protect this and what behaviors would violate this? So as you go through the day, if peace is your standard and you already know it, so write it down, what behaviors will protect your peace today? Taking a walk without your phone. Exercising, Meditating. Listening to some jazz music, Baking. And what behaviors will violate your peace? Scrolling your phone too long, saying yes when you meant no. Overly committing yourself, watching the news, Having a conversation where you're over functioning because you're carrying somebody else's problems and making them your problems. What behaviors will protect your peace? Taking a walk and saying, the only person I'm inviting on this walk, it's me and God. I'm just gonna listen to God on this walk. I'm gonna listen for what it is. What's the real message for me today is the message. Patience is the message. Boundaries is the message. To stop enabling somebody is the message to slow down. Okay? So every day it's gonna be a little different here with me. And today I wanted to give you this sort of model of were all operating, okay? So that tomorrow morning you don't walk straight into the baking soda. And so I would highly suggest that, you know, I said to you today, what if today doesn't feel like rushing? What if today we start to pattern interrupt. And so I would highly suggest today it would be very nourishing to take a walk today without your phone. Take a walk. And what's going to start to happen, right? And we're building these building blocks. What's going to start to happen is you're going to realize that when peace becomes your standard and the baking soda starts to settle and you start to see clearly, everything becomes possible. But when you're living day after day after day and it's Groundhog Day, same thought, same feeling, same pressure, same overwhelm, same lack, same urgency, same scarcity. You're right, it won't be a different year. But right now, your choice. And we're just taking baby steps, but powerful baby steps, your choice is you're looking at, and we said yesterday, there's these two paths in front of you. One path feels like urgency and pressure and Groundhog Day. And the other path feels like ease and synchronicity. And your soul knows that you came to the world to experience a Flow state. To be in this divine conversation, to be led to how you're supposed to spread the most amount of light with the gifts you have and to enjoy the pleasures of this world. Do you know that it says in the Talmud that when you get to heaven that you're asked to answer for every pleasure you denied yourself in this world? You have to answer for that. Why did you deny it to yourself? Because it's here. You know, today I took my morning walk. I don't know what they're called. Maybe, you know, but they're these birds that. They're white birds, but they have, like, bright fluorescent pink feathers on them. So beautiful. I'm like, oh, my God. I can't believe God makes a bird with these, like, hot pink little wings. What's it called? I just forgot what it's called. Rosetta.
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Spoonbills.
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It's exactly what it's called, Deanna. Then there was a little otter that came out of the pond. And I was just sitting there with tears in my eyes, thinking I'm the only person sitting here, right? Looking at this. And is heaven really any prettier than this? Like, does it actually get better? You know, it's 52 degrees outside. The sun is shining, the sky is blue. There's an otter. And this little bird, this little duck floats by. And what starts to happen is you just start realizing there's so much that you can just appreciate and savor, right? And then once the mind is not filled with that fog and that cortisol, that's when the power within you can actually move and clear a path, because the mind moves out of the way and the real intelligence takes over. That's when you get inspiration. That's when you turn thoughts into things. That's when everything starts to change, and you best believe it. That's when the world around you completely changes. Right? And that's the beauty of that movie, Groundhog Day. By the end of the movie, his entire life is different. What changed? Well, he changed, right? When you change, when the world within you changes, everything around you, everything around you, all that was already hidden in plain sight. The best feelings you could have in a relationship, the best opportunities for your business, just right there. They were always right there. But the doors that are meant to open for you can only open for you when you walk through them. And when we are filled with that same feeling, that same sticky, that same sort of foggy feeling in our mind and in our bodies, we don't even see that the open door is right there. We Just keep walking right past it, right? And just living a repeat of the past rather than being where in the present moment and what's happening in the present moment, that's where you meet God. That's where all things are possible. And we are being asked, right? Our job is to come back online, right? To take our attention back, put the needle back on the record. That's what we're doing. So I hope today was helpful for you. I realize that I'm probably never going to be able to do a 15 minute session, so I hope that this is okay, that it's 30 minutes. I love you. I hope that you continue to love yourself in the way that you deserve to so that you can be the blessing you were meant to be for this world. I hope that you'll remember my little Mr. Wizard. And if you feel like going a little bit further in your journaling, the question is, if peace is my standard that I'm committing to for 20, 26, what behaviors support that and what behaviors today? No, They're a no go because they violate my peace. Okay. I love you. Thank you for being here. Oh, my team wanted me to remind you two things. Number one, you can watch replays@kathyheller.com hub. I think they're all in there. And what did she tell me to say? Hang on. She told me to say that. Oh, we would love you to take a screenshot right now and post a hashtag, which is Kathy Heller Challenge, and maybe share one of your takeaways from today. Because I do think that the conversations we have here are very powerful. And I think if you shared one thing with your social media following, your friends and family, whoever it is that you got from today, number one, it'll help you, like, embody it, but also might help somebody else to be inspired. And of course, people can still join for the next several days because we're only on day two and we are here for 14 days. Okay. May it be a blessed day. And we'll be back same time tomorrow.