← Everything Is Energy with Cathy Heller
Loading summary
Transcript70 lines
- [00:00]
Kathy Heller
I'm so excited to invite you to something really special. I have a awesome intro to Kabbalah workshop. It's called the Divine Blueprint. And it's actually Pay what yout Want, where I'm gonna teach you the ancient wisdom that completely changed my life, the spiritual laws behind abundance and miracles, and really, truly why we're here. If you've ever felt stuck or you feel like you're doing all the things but you're not seeing the breakthrough, then this is for you. You're gonna learn how to plug into the 99% of reality to that's actually the real thing. The part that you can't see, but you can shift out of any kind of lack and into abundance and align with the frequency where synchronicities and blessings just start happening all the time. You're gonna have this feeling of being grounded and inspired and connected to something so much bigger. And the best part is you can get the workshop for whatever amount feels good to you, because it's pay what you want. Just head to kathyheller.comworkshop and you can grab it. And I would love to hear how this landed for you. So you can DM me on Instagram if you want to tell me your biggest takeaway from watching the workshop. Hey, guys, it's Kathy Heller. Welcome back to the Kathy Heller Podcast. I just wanted to share with you. I was having a conversation with my kids the other day about something I've just realized, which is so important. There are certain feelings that we carry that are just. They don't serve us. And for me, I've realized that something that was passed down in my family was just a way of operating through guilt. And you don't even realize it. It just becomes so insidious. But we have to understand that when we make decisions from guilt, we're abandoning ourself. And we're doing it in the name of goodness, right? But we're confusing self betrayal with kindness, and we're calling that love. But guilt is not guidance. It's actually a trauma response. It's the echo of old survival patterns that told us that safety comes from pleasing everyone but ourselves. The truth is that when you choose what feels aligned to you, when you honor what's real instead of what's expected of you, you become truly medicine for everybody else. And I read something this weekend that said that you will actually live longer. Really? Because there is so much stress that happens from not being authentic. And then, of course, we glow differently and we just create better, cleaner love and deeper peace. And more abundance. So this is your reminder to stop performing and just be. Because when you're self honoring, you're in harmony with your truth, with God. And the moment you stop living for approval and you start living from alignment, life just rushes in to meet you with so many miracles. And it's not always easy to remember that. But I just want you to try it. I just want you to try it. And you'll see. You'll see that things just seem to work out better for everyone when you honor yourself. So today I'm happy because you're going to get to hear a piece of a call that I did. I was coaching one of our one on one clients, Hannah, and she's been in this state where she's wanting to take action, but something just kept holding her back and she was so generous. She said that we could share this with you because she felt like maybe it would also inspire and help you. In this session we were looking into what does it really mean to surrender control? What does it mean to embrace the messiness of the creative process and have radical self acceptance? And why is there actually so much potential in the unknown? This is a great conversation for anyone who's been overthinking, for anyone who's always waiting for the perfect right time or who's afraid to get it wrong. I think that this might unlock something for you. Take a listen.
- [03:48]
Hannah
I've been in this place of like healing and looking for the blocks and that was like my resistance when we started and, and obviously I got a lot from that. But it is of just like I'm ready to take action and when I do. Like yesterday I went to record a session and like technology wouldn't work. It took forever to download a platform like my Spotify just went nowhere. Like the playlist wouldn't load and stuff like that where I'm like, okay, universe, like not doing this, I don't know, but it's like this constant thing of like I feel like I'm just bumping up against it and I know that that's part of how we transform, right? Like when you're up leveling, there's always an obstacle or crunchiness or. But it just like enough like I'm exhausted of doing that. Like I just want to be like choosing action. I feel like yesterday I was very much just like exhausted and trying to make things work and then today I was like, let's just have a little more fire.
- [04:57]
Kathy Heller
What I would like to add is I always feel very energized when I Remember the truth, which is my greatest tool to architect. My reality lives in my consciousness. And so while many people are talking about getting degrees or creating PowerPoints or amassing a certain amount of followers or whatever you could conceive of on a concrete level, when I remember that my architectural tool is in the inner awareness, I get so excited because I'm like, oh, I just need to sit on my bed and move into a quantum space. Or I need to go take a walk and, and get beyond the illusion. And literally I'm summoning like that. That is my tool. Just recently, Friday night, I was with a group of my friends. One of my closest friends from college lives in Florida, so we get to see each other now all the time. And I've known her since I'm 19, which is really fun. And you know how you're always a stand for your friends more than they can be for themselves sometimes. So I've sort of watched her own journey with her own self worth and she lost her dad when she was 7 and I think it's pretty significant in the way that she shows up and all that to say she was telling me, to my great delight, that she has been working for this like really condescending, patronizing, very demeaning person for a long time. Which I'm always like, okay, why do you keep allowing this at all in your life? She's so special and she tells me that it like clicked for her. And she said something finally which is like, this is not going to work for me anymore. Like she sent the email which was like, I'm done. Which took so much. It took so much because that was where all of her money came from. And sure enough, literally within, I think it was 48 hours, she gets a call to fly on a private jet. She's for a long time been an editor of design magazines and been in the design editorial space working for these very often high strung, self important people, making very little, even if she's an editor of a magazine, because these are not very well funded enterprises. And it kind of feels like a cool job, except you're barely making, you know, $55,000. You just get like to go to a lot of cool things, right? But she's been doing it for so long and she's so beloved and so many designers and anyway, long story short, 48 hours after she was like, goodbye, which for her was like, her nervous system was like, I can't believe I just did that, she got asked to come on a private jet to Nantucket to be the stylist for a certain hotel. It was literally like in the quantum fields. Like moments after she chose herself and even more significantly, her boyfriend, who she's been with for two and a half years. And it's been like, you know, is he all in? Is he not? He took her to see a place and said, I could see us living here together. Because she stepped into self love. She stepped into wholeness. So like a boomerang, two different things in two different verticals of her life came in. And I was like, of course that happened because you made the quantum leap. And since that's happened now, she just had me. She's like, I see it now. I'm going to open my own design firm. I'm going to do this. I know what I'm calling it. So I'm like, put it on Instagram. And she just got three clients. They were already in her world. She's like, what has happened in like the span of like 72 hours? Right? So our mind will convince us that in order for us to find fulfillment, there are all these things that need to be done. There is only one thing that has to be done, which is the full and total radical acceptance of yourself from the deepest place.
- [09:41]
Charlotte
Yeah.
- [09:42]
Kathy Heller
Like a guttural battle cry of like, this is the Cheryl Strayed Wild is like, I have come to fully love and accept and acknowledge and be sovereign with all my parts. Because when there is shame, we can't manifest because we are completely out of wholeness. When there is any criticism living inside of our lived experience, you cannot manifest. It's. It's like tying your hands. You can't do it. You can't play the piano with your hands tied. You can't play the music. It's shame. All of this is like the constant comparing and talking yourself down. It's like you're speaking down to yourself. Right.
- [10:34]
Hannah
And.
- [10:34]
Kathy Heller
And that is separating you from God. It's separating you. You know, I was talking to somebody today who said to me in a text, he wants to give me a gift because I affiliated for him. So he wants to offer me free coaching, which is like, I'm fine, but I don't really want it. But I'm like, okay with it. And I can't commit to him on a time because I think I'm not all in.
- [10:57]
Hannah
Yep.
- [10:58]
Kathy Heller
And he's like, text me. He's like, you're all over the place and you can't commit. The only thing you can commit to is non committal. And I was like, ooh, that's such a juicy thing to say. It's also very, like, direct, I guess, or maybe rude, I don't know. But then I was like, I love that about myself that I'm all over. That's like, what I love about myself. Like, actually I was like, oh, my God. And I was like, ooh, I wonder if there's a way in which being all over the place is my rebellion that keeps me from having more ease. Like, I probably could add a little a touch of structure because, like, God, do I have. And I. I was like, in inquiry, I was like, what do I have against structure? I was like, oh, I hate structure. And then I was like, well, that's like a little girl thing. That's weird. But my point is, I could be in that juiciness because there's no judgment to see what I was like, well, the Kathy Heller that I like, perform, the girl, the avatar, I totally made her rebel against structure. But I love that about her. But. But, like, is that childish? Is there a part of that that's like, exhausting her? Because it's interesting, right? I can do that where I'm like, I love this girl. Like, she can be a hot mess, of course, but I love her. Right? I think that's what Charlotte and I are saying in unison. And right there is the fucking unlock, right? Does that make sense?
- [12:26]
Hannah
It makes complete sense. I feel like I just get lost in the, like, what Tracy was saying this morning also really made sense because I feel like I have this pattern that is in, right? Like, my past self of, like, not doing it. And therefore I don't build confidence. And like, round and round we go. So I keep looking back here to stay safe and I hear both of you of like, there is a radical acceptance that I have absolutely not stayed stepped into that is also holding me back. But I get caught and, like, so do I just sit here and be radically accepting and, like, continue doing that. But that's not.
- [13:06]
Kathy Heller
Well, what we're saying is if there is a judger that's present for good reason, your intuition is going to say, I'm not doing it with you.
- [13:18]
Hannah
Right?
- [13:19]
Kathy Heller
So even in the question, you're saying, so I just accept myself for just sitting around and being lazy. And it's like, no, the acceptance is the moment you'll move your ass because it's the intention that creates it, right? If I tell my daughter, okay, you're going to prepare for your Bat Mitzvah. You need to get every word right. When you get up there, you have 10 months, and every family member is going to be there and da, da, da. I mean, you just need to nail it. Then. If she was a healthy person, she should go. You know, I was thinking, I don't want to have one. But if I were to say to her, hey, this is a beautiful tradition, if you feel up for it, it would be awesome. I think we'd all love to, like, punctuate the moment. The whole idea is that you do your best and feel good and feel like you're entering into some covenant with the God that loves you. So I want you to love this. And if at any point something about it doesn't feel good, let's talk about it. Because it's a day to celebrate this amazing path that you get to choose to walk with God for the rest of your life, as you always have. But now as an adult, Right. It's a rite of passage. Now she might say, let's go. Right? So for really good reason. Many people I know don't start their podcasts because they know they're going to be mean to themselves. They're going to be perfectionist. It's yet another thing they're going to shame themselves about. So that's actually really healthy and smart. I free myself from doing anything perfectly, which is why I'm like, I got this. Because I'm not going to bring with me a judger. She's not going to help me. Also, what if you're not that powerful? Meaning to say, what if the reason that you haven't ever gone all in is because it's not been in divine timing? Meaning to say, what if when God wants exactly the timeline of what needs to be created, somehow, some way, we get it done? Like, I wonder, I don't even know if part of the reason that you didn't start or whatever. Right. Everything I just said, I agree that that's part of it. But also, it's like, it might not have been the thing. It was almost the thing. Even if it was adjacent to the thing, it's still not the thing. So you kind of know that. And most people create a lot of mediocrity until they finally actually pull the car over, take a beat, and then they go make something really powerful. And so what's better? I don't know, like just making stuff or pausing. Because there's a part of you that's really wise that said this isn't it yet. And it could be that when you went to do this thing yesterday, part of it is there's still Something about the level of intention and consciousness. That's the DNA of this that you want to sink into before you start on the wrong foot, you know, on a footing that's like, not what you want to breathe into the life, right? Because the energy by which they say, like, if you're cooking dinner for someone, the energy of how you felt in that kitchen, it's in the food, right? And so there's a part of you that wants to be congruent with yourself. And then there really is not even a. And this is the truth. When you are, you don't really have a moment where you start things because you don't know where you stop and God begins. Things just flow. We don't have to, like, tell ourselves, you know, it just is. You know, I think about Charlotte, you and I, like, when did it, like, decide. I don't know. I never interviewed her. We never decided. It was like she was there and I sensed her and she sensed me. And then this and that. And it's just like. It's just like, oh, we're dancing. Like, it's like we didn't have to decide to begin. It just begins. You just show up for people and you don't even know why you're doing it. You just feel right when you do it. Then they feel right about it. Then it feels like reciprocity. Next thing you know, you just built something. You can't believe what you built. You weren't even trying to build it. You didn't even think you were building it, but you were. And so all of this is like in the coming home to the wild, beloved, fullest, authentic version of yourself. It's like, that's where you meet God, and next thing you know, you're just moving. There's not much thought about it. The thinking about all of these things is telling me it's still not coming from. Like, I'm in overflow and I'm just sharing this from this soul level. It's more still like, is this going to get me the grade? Am I going to finally believe in myself? Is this going to create the outcome? And none of that is the reason that you should do anything, right? It comes out of just like, I just feel called. I don't even know why. I don't know how to describe it. It's just the next thing I'm called to do. It's not this way in which I'm just making arbitrary steps because someone told me that this is where success is. It's on this ladder. There is no ladder. Does that make sense?
- [18:41]
Hannah
It makes a ton of sense. Yeah. I feel like you're speaking right to myself like as. And then there's this piece for me of like. Well I, I've been just being, I've been sitting on the side like there's this. Yeah. Still this piece of like. Well if you're not in any action nothing will show up. Right. So I hear you. Like I don't want to create.
- [19:00]
Kathy Heller
Well you haven't been just being, you've been the opposite. You've been an overthinking analysis. Keeping myself from that is not what we are loving you into and encouraging you into. We're not saying so when you're not dancing in flow you should sit and overthink and criticize yourself constantly to the point where you paralyze.
- [19:23]
Hannah
Yeah, I hear that.
- [19:25]
Kathy Heller
Right. What we're saying is when you step forward it will be into the unknown. You will choose the mystery and then you can go. Because now it's a dance, now it's in flow, now it's going to work because you're letting go of control, of trying to predict how your sense of safety is going to come every time. It's like the safety is in walking into the mystery. That's when the movie gets good. Right. So everything about not choosing to start is the sure footedness of I need to know the 15 things that are going to be the outcome. And I can already predict I'm not going to get that feeling. Because the journey you want to take is the journey home to God, home to the flow state, home to a dance that's better than any predictable piece of sheet music. You want it to be jazz. Jazz happens in real time. No one knows the next note. That's why it's amazing. Miles Davis said let's go giddy up. That's right.
- [20:40]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [20:41]
Kathy Heller
So if you are not playing jazz, then not starting is you being in your head, afraid to move and be moved by something bigger than yourself. And when you don't start, it's because you know that the way that you're going forward is trying to control something. That it will only resonate when you let go of that and it's untethered. That's what the. That what. That's what moves the world. That's why we all recite certain poets and look at certain pieces of art. That's what chat GPT. That's why I'm not worried about it. Because it doesn't move like jazz, because it's not going to be the wild live edges of humanity and our dance with God, it just can't do that. It's too good. So it's a fraud because we're not like that.
- [21:43]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [21:44]
Kathy Heller
It's the. It's the part of the song where Kelly Clarkson's voice cracks in a moment like this. That's what makes the whole song. If she didn't have that vulnerability, she wouldn't have become. She's the most successful one of all of them. Because her voice cracks. It's in that.
- [22:03]
Charlotte
Yeah.
- [22:04]
Kathy Heller
So there's a lot of people who came before Lady Gaga and they tried to be pop stars and they did all the right moves and no one cares. But she looks insane because she lets herself completely lose herself. It's like you're watching you. You're like, am I watching something I shouldn't be privy to? Because she looks like she's like losing it. That's what Freddie Mercury did for all of us. He just surrendered to the music. And it's actually like you get moved to tears because you're like this person has lost the control of themselves. They've let the music take control. And now I'm crying. I'm like, why am I crying? It's like because he's. His ego's just gone.
- [22:50]
Charlotte
Yeah.
- [22:51]
Kathy Heller
And very few people are that brave to let go that much. Right. That's why there's just a few people that are in the list, you know? But that's what you're after. And that's why you love breath work.
- [23:05]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [23:05]
Kathy Heller
Because the breath says, please move out of the way and let me, Let me do this. And you love letting go of control. And it's the one place you let yourself taking action also though, is there's different kinds of action. And the one I would like you to consider playing with is inspired creative action. And when you take inspired creative action, it's a muse. Right. And so have you read the book the Artist's Way by Julia Cameron? I haven't. Okay. So I would go get that book. She's sold like 35 million copies of it, so you can get it anywhere. Amazon will send it to you by tomorrow. It's a 12 week recovery of creativity. Right. And she talks about the creative, like the soul that wants to create. And she talks about the gremlins in the mind that she calls crazy makers that literally keep you from creating anything. Right. Because they're really wired into perfectionism and they. Right. So that editor part of the mind is not able to be present when you're in creativity. So creativity is a messy process. And in order for us to create and take action, it has to have the essence of messiness or else it will not make anything brilliant. Because the most brilliant thing that you could conceive of, that you would perfect is, is still the most mediocre version of what it's supposed to become. Because when they started out with the ipod, they were not yet anywhere close to what it was supposed to become, which is a phone that has every app on it. They started with just the music in your hand. So they knew, because they're creative geniuses, that they were going to give themselves 20, 40, 90 years to iterate and mess and mess and throw it out onto the wall. Spaghetti, spaghetti, spaghetti. And that's why they would knew they would uncover, oh, it's a phone. Oh, it's an iPad. Oh, it's this. Because they're going to keep going. So when the editor comes into the mind and says, what is it going to look like? Tell me everything. Then you stop creating. So you can't take any action. So you either get to be creative and make brilliant things that start really, really, really, really messy. And, like, the kitchen looks messy first, and then you're going to clean it up. But if you're really anal retentive and you're trying to clean the kitchen while you're cooking, your food won't be as good, because you're not going to give yourself the liberty to try a dash of cardamom or go into, oh, you already cleaned that up. Oh, you're not going to make it messy again. So now we're just keep removing action. So the more editorial that comes in, the less action there is, which is why she keeps talking about acceptance. So creativity requires a radical level of acceptance. Acceptance so that we can move, because we can't move from the analysis. So when people shoot movies, they, as the director of this movie, they give themselves the license, the liberties to shoot the scene five different ways to have the actor take it, take the line this way, take the line this way, and they just get it all out. And then a completely different time is designated for editing the movie. And typically, the person who directs it doesn't edit it, because that would actually be very hard to do. So they bring in another creative genius who says, I wasn't there. You just experimented. You're going to get the Oscar for best Director, but I'm going to decide which way the line went. So I'm actually choosing. You didn't even choose it. You just shot and shot footage and more footage and more footage. Now you give me a mess, 90% of which winds up on the cutting room floor, right? Because they shoot a 90 minute movie for nine months, right? So most of it is not usable. Most of it is a mess. And all of that mess in between all of that, there's Annie hall, there's Schindler's List, there's Dead Poets Society. They pull it out of the mess. Now if he, she, whoever's directing this movie is like, I know what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna be so good at this that I'm going to perfect it as I go and edit it as I go. They won't wind up with a movie. They'll be stuck, they'll be frozen and they won't have a movie. And no one can edit something that you haven't shot. So they haven't shot nothing.
- [28:06]
Hannah
Yep, that lands.
- [28:08]
Kathy Heller
So the creative action again. When you say, I want to be the kind of person who makes brilliant things, I want to create a brilliant business, I want to create a brilliant message, brilliant movement.
- [28:21]
Hannah
Right.
- [28:21]
Kathy Heller
It's like, cool. So I'm going to very much intend to have my perfectionist analytical mind step aside because she's not helpful here. And I'm just gonna like play and create and make a mess. And you know, there'll be all these different ways in which I kind of like put things in the world or talk to people about it. And even as I'm talking about it, it will change five times. And then at some point I get this thing called feedback. And the feedback is interesting because I start to see where there's a world receiving me. And then I get to start to edit based upon what feels like alignment, what feels like it's landing. And then I can make some choices and then I going to create again from a big pile from scratch. And that's where the business will just take off.
- [29:21]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [29:23]
Kathy Heller
And so I've always just been like, this is it. And then, you know, we'll do the next thing and the next thing and the next thing. By the way, the reason that writing a book this just came today. So excited my paperback. The reason this was hard for me is because on my podcast I know that between now and the end of time I can just keep saying it. But this, they were like, no, no. How do you want to say it on this page? And then you have to make it that that's how you say. I'm like, oh, the podcast is a living, growing organism. This is like it was hard because I just don't even. I've already outgrown half the things I say. I could say them better or I could say them new or could say them different. It's already like an old song.
- [30:07]
Hannah
Yeah. Is this landing a hundred percent. I am so fearful of mess. And everything needs to be very. Yeah. Perfected and efficient and like. And it is very much. I can just see exactly where this is. So in my way of doing anything. And the irony is that, like, for me, breath work brings inspired action, but yet, like, I haven't fully released this. And so my inspired action is like, yeah, this feels aligned to create content.
- [30:44]
Kathy Heller
Right.
- [30:44]
Hannah
Like, so there's like this just navigation of, like, it's inspired, but it's inspired inside of who I am right now, which is not somebody who embraces the mess.
- [30:56]
Kathy Heller
And it's interesting because what I think is the most important aspect of breath work is giving yourself the permission to feel all your feelings, which is not tidy.
- [31:06]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [31:07]
Kathy Heller
And so the person who you want to be and in the wellness space is going to have to cross the bridge to herself where she's willing to just put it all on the floor. Yeah. And that's the bravest, most powerful thing you do for others is give them the permission to not be tidy. Yeah. Because grief is messy.
- [31:40]
Hannah
Right.
- [31:41]
Kathy Heller
And so is love and so is anger, and so is joy. Joy is very scary too. It's very messy. And. And that's what's so beautiful is just the surrender to the mess and making a safe place. I mean, I've been in a breath work session where, like, people make a lot of weird noises. And it used to really. I didn't like it because, I mean, I still don't really like hearing people's noises. Like, I'd rather not hear people's noises because I want to hear you chew. I don't want to hear you have an orgasm. I want you to have it. I just really don't like being there for any of these noises. But what I notice about breathwork facilitators is they're just really welcome. Like, they're welcoming everyone to just. And they're holding that the person is safe to feel.
- [32:39]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [32:40]
Kathy Heller
And I really think that this conversation will unlock you and it makes it so fun to create from a place of like, well, what's the creative expression here? How do I want to say this? How do I want to lead this? And who knows? You know, like, maybe at the beginning of every breath work session, before you lay down, you'll Play jazz. Or before you lay down, you'll pull a quote from an artist. Because most artists that we all admire felt their feelings. Their art is a living embodiment of their feeling. And so I don't know what it's going to look like, but when we just take our hands off of this, like, clutching, then you can take action and you just let it inspire you. Like, here comes this messy, living, breathing gift of mine.
- [33:37]
Hannah
Yeah, no, that makes complete sense because I'm so reserved to create content. And for me, it lives. Like, I can't write and it just never comes. But it's inside of, like, I'm already editing it before it's even gotten to my brain space or out of my mouth. And, yeah, now this is really landing. I feel like this going to be a really big unlock.
- [34:00]
Kathy Heller
Yesterday I posted maybe you saw maybe did a video of my daughter five years ago when she was three and a half. She's like, he killed her. She was talking about Anna and Elsa, and she called the she too. It's. She goes, elsa. He kills her.
- [34:16]
Hannah
And I was.
- [34:16]
Kathy Heller
It's so funny. My mom sent me the video and I was like, I'm posting this. Like, it has nothing to do with Kabbalah or manifestation. I was like, I am posting this. It's hysterical. And. And I give myself the license that, like, this is my page. Like, I'm posting whatever I think is, like, interesting or funny. It's like my journal entry for the day. And that's what I like about doing the things this way. I don't. I don't want to build a business that I'm a slave to that I don't like. Why would I want to do that? That sucks. I don't want to create an avatar of a person who it's all together, and then I have to play that role or else my clients won't like me because I've made it that way. What the hell? Like, no people will love the most unbridled version of you is the most interesting.
- [35:09]
Hannah
Yeah, no, I mean, that's who I gravitate towards. Yet, like, the North Star for me is like, the people who look perfect and are doing it, like, and I have no idea they're behind the scenes. I don't think anything's anyone's perfect, but it is. It's the irony of, like, the people I'm most drawn to are living in the beautiful mess. Right. And creating art from it. And yet I'm like, no, but I want to be over there. Yeah.
- [35:34]
Kathy Heller
Because as A kid. There was some importance put on that. I had a million different, you know, messages, and some were good and some were not helpful, but there was a lot of honor given to creative things and creative people and authenticity. And so I didn't feel betwixt or bewitched by those that were perfect. I actually. I'm always suspect, you know, like, I didn't want to be best friends with the high school girls who were like, just, like. I was like, what are you not saying? You know, like, that freaked me out. And sometimes they turn out to be amazing, and then you have to kind of check your own judgment. But often it's too much of something that I think there's just so much more that we can communicate and that we can impact from a place of the honesty. And so I'm always like, oh, how quickly can I reveal to my audience how authentic this is? Like, you've landed here. We'll get ready. And then I feel like whether they like anything I say or not, at least they feel the difference in that. And that feels good to me. That's my mission statement. Charlotte, what do you think about her? Really, like, just embodying this. Like, she really. I think Hannah's, like, getting it right now, right? This level of, like, not needing to be perfect and putting those always together, but being this messy. There's no straight lines in nature. There's nothing that we love that is, like, buttoned up and hospital cornered. So how. What would be, like, a thought or an intention or a practice that could just, like, help her live in this place and know it's safe?
- [37:28]
Charlotte
Yeah. And I love that you said embodied Kathy, because, you know, Hannah, when you were talking, I don't know if you noticed, but you said release, which, yes, there is an element of release, but it's embodying the person, the messy person. It's really embodying her. I actually think this is the key. The fact that you're resisting going back to your little one, because you've said to me several times, I've done the work. I've been there. I don't want to go back there. I want to move forward. That is the key. That's the key to unlocking the part of you that is hanging on so tightly to that structure, to that perfectionism. It is going back to her and embracing her for her wisdom and embodying the part of you that is fun and playful and messy and just shows up in a very authenticity, authentic way. And so I would invite you to connect with those both Parts. And we can do it together as well in our next session, because we can meet again, but really embody both those parts and have those two little ones have a conversation with each other so they really get each other. So that the messy one understands why the part of you that needs the structure and the perfectionism, why she needs that, why that is so important, what her fears are, what scares her, what lights her up, and then for her to really listen to the messy one, and when they can really understand each other, then the two parts can move forward together. Does that make sense?
- [39:41]
Hannah
That makes a lot of sense. And yes, I will need support with that, because anytime people say, like, play messy dance, I'm just like, how? How does one do that? Like, that's so just not an option or not accessible for me.
- [39:55]
Kathy Heller
You're going to get that book, and then. Then we have another chance to meet, and I want to, like, dive into it with you. That book is so. Because she has you do every single week, and she's going to have you do morning pages. She's going to tell you how to do them, which is just like, letting yourself. Just like, literally, you. You can't stop your pen because you're not allowed to think. So she's gonna be. Even if you have to say, like, I have nothing to say. You have to keep your pen moving. And she has you set a timer and do two pages, front and back, the whole thing. And then she's gonna have you take artist dates, and she's gonna tell you exactly where to go and what to do and what to write. It's so interesting. And Charlotte, so many times, I mean, I just have thought about how all of us have certain ways that we teach certain things to the world. And I know how many people come back to me, and they're like, you give me permission to be messy. And I feel like as much as I love and I just feel so called to teach this level of spirituality, to me, creativity is so spiritual because it really is dancing with the divine. It's really about letting go of the analytical mind. And I said earlier today, like, I don't like structure. And I think it's because of everything we just said. I caution myself to put a lot of thought into anything, because I know as soon as that gets going, I just take God out. I'm edging God out, right? Isn't that what the ego is? It's like, I'm just. I'm just gonna miss it every time. And then you build something, and you realize, I just Built a life that's not even a thimble's worth of what really wants to come out of me.
- [41:36]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [41:36]
Kathy Heller
Because that's what's going to come when I let go of the structure and I just am led by this muse. And then what do you get to create? I don't know. It gets to be so disruptive and different because that alone as an intention is so different that what you want to create is something that feels alive. And what feels alive is what. What allows itself to just be in its fullness. And it doesn't. It doesn't constrict itself. It just. It's alive. Right. And look, most of us. And I think this is what you said. When you grow up and feel like there's a way in which you're too much, you're going to try to contain it and put a lid on it, because it is not safe to be too much. Because creativity is in and of itself just wanting to move into every corner, every dimension. It doesn't want any boundary. Right. It just wants to color everywhere outside the line. And you weren't privy to, like, that feeling safe, you know, so that makes sense. But you let yourself do it in your breath. Yeah.
- [42:55]
Charlotte
And I think I would even question, because you said, oh, I will need help with that, because I can't do it. I would even question that because you can. And in your breath, work. You do that. You do embody that messy, for want of a better word, you do embody her. You do connect with her. You can do that.
- [43:20]
Kathy Heller
Yeah.
- [43:21]
Hannah
Thank you. Both this. Yeah. I feel like all of this just really, really landed.
- [43:28]
Kathy Heller
You're gonna get this book. So in light of that, there's not like that much I have to say in terms of what to tell you to do. But I would consider, like tonight, picking out a recipe of something you've never cooked, putting on jazz in the kitchen, and just feeling what it feels like to be surrounded by hearing something creative, doing something like. Never made upside down pineapple cake before, not even that interested in it, but, like, something about it sounded funny or fun. I'm making it. I'm gonna listen to John Coltrane the whole time and just remember that I was once a child who. This was my home address playing. And that's really what it is. It's recovering of that magic and that magic just stop feeling safe. And now it all makes sense. Like, thank you for honoring us and letting us in. Because through the course of these few sessions, like, it all makes perfect sense now. And. And Then it makes sense to me. This is how beautiful it is. Your medicine becomes your message. This is exactly what you will do. You will be the perfect person to take someone's hand. Because Rabbi Aaron says you can't help someone out of a well unless you've been in there and you know the way out. And that's exactly how you know what's next. And so your very medicine becomes your message. So you're going to get to build something where you're taking the medicine, which is playing and being messy, and it goes with the feelings of the breath really nicely. And then you're sharing that with people, and you're bringing them into that. And you can speak in a way to that I can't, because they'll know. She knows. She really gets how hard on myself I could be. So she's the only one I'm going to listen to. It's like somebody giving you marriage advice who just had like, oh, I'm married since I'm 12, so I was with him since I'm 12. Married for six years. You're like, I just don't want your marriage advice because you. But. But the person who's like, no, I was married to someone just like that. And now you can listen to me because I got over that or I found this. Right. You are being asked, you're being called forward to help all of those people. And when you liberate yourself and let yourself be creative, those questions around, how much will this do for the world will stop.
- [46:02]
Hannah
Right?
- [46:03]
Kathy Heller
Yeah. Because the liberation itself will be like, even if one of one person gets this painting in their house, it's such a transmission.
- [46:14]
Hannah
Right.
- [46:15]
Kathy Heller
But when we're making things from the part of us you knew. See, you knew the whole time. It's not worth going down this road.
- [46:22]
Hannah
Yeah.
- [46:22]
Kathy Heller
This is what I'm meant to make.
- [46:24]
Hannah
Right? Exactly. Yeah. Now, when you say it like that, I'm like, yeah, that. Like, that's what I want to be doing with my life of, like, changing one or, like, supporting one person going through these transitions that I've gone through, these things that I've gone through. Yeah. But I'm trying to make it make sense. So I appreciate this conversation so much.
- [46:45]
Kathy Heller
I'm so delighted. It's so much fun to play with both of you in the sandbox. And, Hannah, I can tell you that the way you stay with us and keep up, like, meaning in your constitution, you're gonna be a huge influencer. You're a power of actual influence, not the, like. Yeah. Is You've just been waiting for someone to play chess with you who just sees through all your. Yep. And loves you. And you're very, very, very smart. So you need someone, like, really smart. And Charlotte and I, like, we got you. So go get this book, the Artist's Way, please. Begin it, start reading it. You are going to freaking love it. And then when we speak again, I am very excited to see and hear and get into what's next.
- [47:47]
Hannah
Amazing.
- [47:48]
Charlotte
Yeah. Your energy looks different.
- [47:52]
Hannah
Yeah. I feel like the weight off my shoulders. It's the being seen. Right. And it's like, yes. That's what I've been trying to, like, get to or see or have somebody verbalize in a way that, like, lands. Yeah.
- [48:05]
Kathy Heller
Love it. So happy to be a part of it. Thank you, Charlotte, for your amazing work and loving kindness and presence. Such big, big, beautiful presence. All right, to be continued. Keep us posted. Thank you. So I hope that that inspired you to go take some messy action. I want to give a huge thank you to Hannah for letting us share this with you. We're going to have her website in the show notes so you can follow along with the work that she's doing. But here are the takeaways. Number one, your greatest tool to architect your reality lives in your consciousness. Number two, there's only one thing that has to be done, which is the full and total radical acceptance of yourself from the deepest place. Number three, the safety is in walking into the mystery. That's when everything gets good. Number four, the journey you want to take is in the journey home to God, home to that flow state, home to a dance that's better than any predictable piece of sheet music because you want it to be jazz. Number five, the person you want to be has to be willing to just put it all on the floor. That's the bravest, most powerful thing that you ever do for others. The most unbridled version of you is actually the most interesting. And number six, creativity is a messy process. In order to create and take action, you must surrender to the mess. Thank you so much for being here because I just know that you have a million things going on. So I appreciate that you're listening and there's so many good episodes coming up. So make sure you follow along on Apple podcasts or Spotify or wherever you're listening. And if you're loving the podcast, go leave us a review. I love reading them. I'm actually going to read you one that we got recently, and it says the truth in a digestible format. What a Fabulous podcast. I'm so grateful that Kathy so generously offers her wisdom and life learnings in a way that you can truly understand. She's so relatable and I feel like I'm connecting with a friend when I listen to her episodes. Dive in. You will not regret it. That is so nice. Thank you so much. It's so sweet that you guys leave me reviews. We're going to be reading more of these out loud on the show, so leave a review if you haven't yet. And before we go, I just want to let you know that my book comes out on paperback on November 11th, and if you go and grab it, there are so many fun freebies, bonuses, meditations that you can get. There's a whole video series that you will love on abundance. You can just go to kathyheller.com book after you pre order the paperback. I feel like it's fun to have a paperback because you can bend it and highlight it and take it to the beach. It's like, it's, it's good. And maybe if you enjoyed the hardcover, you want to get the paperback for a friend or for someone in your family. Also, we decided that Black Friday should be not just one day of November, but every single day of November. So if you want to join our membership, you can get 20% off when you use the code ART A, R T. Just go to kathyhar.com life and use the code ART. And the reason we're using the code art is because your life should feel like art every single day. You should make your day something that is just about these moments, right? Where you sip your tea a little bit longer and you find a little patch of sunlight and you actually just drink in these moments and you savor, right? And you find this inner peace and this inner wisdom. And so we are upping the ante. We've already been doing daily one minute meditations that I send out every day to everyone in the membership. But now we're gonna be doing morning journal prompts. And you're of course going to still get the two live sessions with me and the community sessions every single week. It's such a great place for you to implement the things that we talk about on this show. So if you want to join us, now's the time. You can get 20% off. You can go to kathyheller.com life I love you so much and thank you so much for being a part of this. I'll talk to you soon.