Podcast Summary: "What's on Your 'Almost' List?" - The Cathy Heller Podcast with Cathy Heller

Episode Date: January 23, 2026
Host: Cathy Heller
Main Theme: Identity, Self-Betrayal, and Actually Becoming Your “2.0” Self

Episode Overview

In this minisode, Cathy Heller challenges listeners to confront their patterns of almost changing—where dreams remain unfulfilled and goals untouched—not due to laziness, but to deep-seated identity and generational programming around self-betrayal. The episode is a call to move beyond wishful thinking and spiritual surface work into concrete behavioral change, aligning daily actions with one’s highest, most expansive self. Cathy introduces her new program, "Done," designed to help people shift from endless planning to real transformation, eliminating the annual sadness of unfulfilled resolutions.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Manifestation Requires Behavioral Change, Not Just Positive Thinking

• Identity is the Real Block:
  Cathy opens by explaining how real transformation isn’t about “trying harder” or manifesting through vibes alone, but about fundamentally changing habitual behaviors that reinforce outdated identities.
  • Quote (00:00):

    “If you keep saying that you want a new life, but your days still look pretty much the same, it’s identity. Most people aren't blocked. They're just unconsciously loyal to the version of themselves that they've always been.” — Cathy

• Habits Over Affirmations:
  Visualization and desire alone are not enough; action is necessary for life to “respond differently.”
  • Quote (01:04):

    “You can visualize the next level all day long, but if your habits stay the same, life keeps responding with the same results, the same patterns, the same money, the same almost Groundhog Day, but just with affirmations.” — Cathy

2. The "Almost" List: The Truth Behind Unfulfilled Dreams

Cathy introduces the concept of the “almost” list—those goals you nearly achieved but never finished.

• Year in Review — The Regret of Almost:
  Cathy prompts listeners to reflect on 2025:
  • Quote (03:31):

    “What did you almost do in 2025? Did you almost become powerful? Did you almost set the boundaries that you needed to set?... This is the best list ever, because this is where the rubber meets the road. So let's get honest.” — Cathy

• A Personal List:
  She gets vulnerable, sharing her own almosts despite her overall success.

3. Why We Stay Stuck: The Pattern of Self-Betrayal

• Choosing Others Over Ourselves:
  Cathy exposes a hard truth: We’re more comfortable letting ourselves down than risking others’ disappointment.
  • Quote (05:26):

    “…We've gotten so used to self abandonment, self betrayal. That's really what it is. We would rather disappoint ourselves than anyone else.” — Cathy

• The Cycle is Generational:
  She explains how women, in particular, have been conditioned for centuries to self-betray—being “good girls” rather than living their fullest truths.
  • Quote (06:11):

    “It's because it is genetically passed down. Right? We are the generation of women who've been told, ‘Hey girl, hey, you can do whatever you want!’ But that was just not the way it was for thousands of years.” — Cathy

4. The Solution: Action Through Identity Shift

• “To Done” List vs “To-Do” List:
  Cathy flips the script, inviting listeners to create a “to done” list for 2026, not just goals, but completed dreams.
• Accountability and Support - The “Done” Program:
  Cathy introduces her 90-day program, “Done,” built around daily identity habits, live coaching, and community—because structure and consistent commitment are necessary for deep change.

Memorable Quotes & Timestamps

• On the futility of surface manifestation:

  "Manifestation is not about wanting harder or having only better vibes. It's actually about your behavior."
  – Cathy, 00:25

• On the almost list:

  “You almost got divorced. You almost started a business. You almost had fun. You almost launched a podcast... How does it feel that year after year, you look in the rearview mirror and there’s a long list of almost?”
  – Cathy, 03:44

• On self-betrayal’s roots:

  “We have guilt in our head, like, I can’t do that because I need it. It all goes back to self betrayal and self abandonment... your job is to be nice and good. Be a good girl.”
  – Cathy, 06:01

• On breaking the cycle:

  “You are the answer to their prayers.”
  – Cathy, 06:44

Important Timestamps

• 00:00 – Discussing identity and why patterns don’t change
• 01:15 – Explanation of the “Done” program and its purpose
• 03:31 – Deep dive: What’s on your almost list? Self-review exercise
• 05:26 – Root causes: Why do we keep disappointing ourselves?
• 06:11 – Generational conditioning and self-betrayal

Cathy’s Tone & Style

Cathy’s delivery is grounded yet encouraging, candid and often vulnerable. She lovingly holds the mirror up, urging listeners to move from introspection and intention to bold, sustained action—not through shame but empathetic truth-telling.

Summary Takeaways

• Surface manifestation is not enough; everything changes through identity-backed action.
• Your “almost” list is powerful data; it reveals where self-betrayal and old habits block your progress.
• Women, especially, are rewriting centuries of programming around putting themselves last.
• Creating a “to done” list requires support, structure, and a willingness to prioritize your own dreams without apology.
• Real transformation comes from shifting how you see (and treat) yourself—then your life must reorganize around the new you.

For those needing more than inspiration—a real catalyst for change—Cathy’s message (and her “Done” program) provides both tough love and tangible pathways.