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This episode is sponsored by our good friends at five Hour Energy. All right, Labor Day is right around the corner and that means I've taken one more spin around the sun. What if my energy boost could taste like my birthday cake? A big old birthday party in my mouth without the awkward singing from Steve in accounting. That's what you will get with the new five Hour Energy Confetti Craze flavor. It's a vanilla y buttery, full on birthday cake vibe without all the sugar and the need to crash. It's got as much caffeine as a fancy 12 ounce cup of coffee, but as mentioned, zero sugar. And here's the best part. The thing is, you can toss it in your bag, your glove box, your sock drawer, or keep it in your fridge. So next time you go to grab an emergency snack, you've got confetti in your mouth. And the confetti craze is only here for a limited time. Translation. Get it now before it's gone and you're back to pretending that the office room donuts are festive. Five Hour Energy Confetti Craze flavor is available online. So head to FiveHouseEnergy.com or order yours today on Amazon and start living that big birthday life. And Happy birthday to me.
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Commercial break is coming up soon. But first I wanted to tell you a little story. The year was 2000 something. My 12th child had just been born. It was late at night. I was feeding her and she lovingly looked into my eyes and said, daddy, you're so very handsome. And I thought to myself, I will never know love like this again. And the only thing that could make this moment better would be a sweet blue and white trucker hat with an embroidered commercial break logo logo on it. And now, many years later, I've made that dream come true. Well, not me, Astrid. But you too can know love like this by going to shop. TCBpodcast.com for our very first limited edition merch drop pre Order now@shop tcbpodcast.com and you too can know what it feels like to be loved by exclusive TCB Merch.
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And welcome back to the Crabapple Hour of Power. Each night between 2 2:15 and 3:15am we pull back the curtains on the dark shadows of the Crabapple government speaking truth to power. I am your host as always, Rusty Crosswire. I'm also the host of the Freedom Frequency podcast available where you get some but not all of your podcasts. Tonight we ask the question why the Crabapple government has been covering up multiple alien abductions right here in the township. While Mayor Schlutz has promised, repeated repeatedly, to release files of these abductions to the public, no such action has been taken. And this quasi reporter has to ask the tough question why? I recently had an opportunity to sit down and talk to one of these citizens who has been repeatedly abducted by said aliens. Nancy Yedelstein claims to be taken night after night after night after night up into a smelly UFO full of mud, repeatedly dropped directly back into her car with an empty bottle of Boone's Farm. Coincidence? I think not. While Nancy is not legally able to operate a motor vehicle, police are claiming that her UFO story is simply a cover up for her nightly drive to the liquor store to get said Boone's Farm. A likely story indeed. During my six and a half hour interview with her, which is now available on my own Freedom frequency platform@freedomfrequency.com org CA Crabapple we had a wide ranging discussion. Here is a clip from that interview.
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Every day I'm abducted by an alien and I say I want to not be abducted by an alien for once in my goddamn whole life. I hate the stinky alien in a spaceship full of mud and the stinky alien makes me smell bad because I'm around him all the damn time. And now my boss asks me, why do you smell like a whole lot of hell?
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This is clear proof and firsthand evidence of covered up alien abductions here in Crabapple. And I want the truth. This is also a good goddamn reason to make sure you buy my colloidal silver. Colloidal silver can protect you from alien abductions and many other maladies as spelled out on my website, but not in any way endorsed by the fda. Let's take a commercial break to hear more about that colloidal silver and then we'll be back on this episode of the Commercial break.
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My background as a venture capitalist. So what I started doing oh we.
E
Didn'T know that he's a venture Capitalist.
A
Wasn't he selling lawn care services? Cold calling lawn care services.
E
Yes, he was.
A
He's a venture capitalist.
E
I didn't know that about him. Little tidbit.
A
Wow. I had no idea. Wow. He's a venture capitalist.
E
What qualifies you as that?
A
Yeah, you're a venture capitalist. Like I was a morning talk show host on radio.
D
Looking at all of these platforms from Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, you know, the Better Business Bureau, Google, Yahoo, Bing, Alignable.
A
I invested in all of them. Bing.
C
The next episode of the commercial break starts now.
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Oh, yeah, Cats and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co host of this show, Chris and Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chris.
E
Best to you, Brian, and best of.
A
You out there in the podcast universe. How the hell are you? Thanks for joining us. We all are now going to go through another round of fantastic hype and hyperbole, as Taylor Swift has announced on not this podcast, but another podcast, she will be releasing her 13th studio album known as Showgirls.
E
I think that's right.
A
Showgirls. Showgirl cover or something like that. Something having to do with Showgirls. And now the speculation, the decoding. See, Taylor Swift did something extremely smart early on in her career. And I'm sure that she did this. I'm sure that she did this in little bits and pieces, but then it became its own thing and now probably has much help from a lot of different people. Although, I don't know, maybe Taylor does this all on her own. I highly doubt it, but okay. Taylor Swift has built an entire mythology around her music. It's. No, it's not just about the music. To be a Swifty is to be a detective, a MacGyver of the coded messages that she's always sending. And this is. And that's. And the other things.
E
Yeah.
A
And here's how I know that, because I live with a bunch of Swifties.
E
Yes, you do.
A
And that's okay with me. I. I'm okay with that. But here's how wild this goes. You ready for this?
E
Yeah.
A
She's on her boyfriend's podcast. Travis and Jason Kelsey. She's on their podcast. It is previewed a couple of days ahead of time in some reels and then it's going to stream. The podcast has already been recorded, but it's going to stream. See, on YouTube, when you're a creator, you can put a video on and then you can put a countdown on that video. You can say it's going to release at midnight on this night. And then the countdown start. It can start two hours, three hours ahead of time. I think we did this a couple of times, and I was the only one waiting for the video to come on. But supposedly YouTube is supposed to, like, you know, favor the algorithm favors it not for people like us, but for people like them. Yes. And millions of people were waiting for the stream to come on of this recorded podcast. It crashed YouTube server. So for a period of time, there were people who couldn't get on. Yeah, Anything Taylor does is just an event. And everybody knew that she was there not for shits and giggles, but for a purpose. And so she discussed how she bought her catalog back from Scooter Braun. So she gave a little juice there, but then she went on kind of like a soliloquy. After being asked a question, she announced her album.
E
That girl is booked and busy. I mean, she doesn't stop I for her. Go girl.
A
I listen, I think Taylor is a badass girl boss. I think in order to be a badass girl boss, you got to step on a couple heads along the way. I think she's done that. I think she's got. I think she's legaled up. I think she's PR'd up. I think not everything is as it seems, but that is how everybody plays the game. And so good for her, because there's no doubt about one thing about Taylor Swift. By all accounts, it's her that's driving the bus.
E
Yes, exactly.
A
It's not some manufactured. I mean, not manufactured. She wasn't created in some lab like a lot of pop artists are. She has been in charge of her own career. And so for that, I. There's. I can't. There's no credit to be taken away from her. I like Taylor Swift. I think what she's done with her career has been quite amazing, too. And I think she lays it all out there. Yeah. And I think she represents a positive image largely for girls around the world. And having girls, I can't argue that they like Taylor Swift. I'm like, okay, like Taylor Swift. She's a entity. She's a brand. She's a business. She doesn't. She's not out there, you know, crashing cars and.
E
Right.
A
You know, she's just. She makes mistakes like everybody else does. And like I said, she's legaled up. She's PR ed up. She will sue you if you're on the wrong side of her. Her team will go after you. She is a business, and A brand. She is highly protected. And in that sense, I think that there's some manufacturing that goes on. There's some bubble that she lives in. But, okay, whatever. That's not the point. The point is she goes on some soliloquy, and that in that soliloquy, she starts explaining how she loves her shows. She loves when people get together. She says, you know, I always am trying to message the fans and let them know if you're paying attention, you'll know that, you know, hey, you may not even be paying attention to the lights that are upside down that are, you know, in Braille or whatever I might be. You know, whatever it might be. She's like, I like that. She's just talking in assumptions. She's not saying anything specific. She's just giving a conversation to which most people would just fall asleep at this part. Not fall asleep. Like. Like, I'm not paying attention to what she's saying, but you're just listening to her. But because swifties are swifties and they know nothing is as it seems with the mythology of Taylor Swift. One person went out and said, why did she say that? The lights were upside down in braille? And they went and they took video footage of her concert, and they found that at the very, very top of her stage, almost insignificant lighting. Colored lighting. A little strip of colored lighting. And that strip of colored lighting was just flashing random nonsense and colors. And so they screenshotted all of those throughout the show. They turned them right side up. They put them into chat, tcb, and then they decoded them as if they were Braille.
D
And.
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And what it came up with was a love note to Travis. A love note to Travis that some people believe may be the track listing for her next album, which is unbelievable. She also then.
E
God, she went that far. And can I just say that I remember us talking about these two two years ago, whenever they first met.
A
Two, three years ago. Yeah, yeah.
E
And I said, I hope they make it. And they are really. I think they're doing a fantastic job of navigating the spotlight.
A
It must be so incred. Incredibly difficult. While it all seems. Yeah, it all seems very, you know, like. It all seems very light and fluffy on the surface. It must be incredibly difficult to be in the belly of the beast 24 hours a day, no sleep, no sunshine, always under the spotlight, never left alone. That's got to be really hard, Astrid. And I know what that's like. And it's. Yeah, it's challenging. It's taxing. I. I'm surprised Astrid and I are. Are weathering it as well as we do, quite frankly.
E
And you guys are doing a great job, too.
A
Yes. Our. Our next episode will stream at midnight tonight, and I expect all three of you will be watching.
E
Yeah. If our lights are upside down, it's just our mistake.
A
Yeah, our lights are upside down. On purpose. On mistake. Yeah, on purpose. By mistake.
E
Yeah.
A
But one of the other interesting things that happened is that. And this was brought to my attention by Tom Papa. Tom put out a reel where he showed a clip of. Of Taylor talking about her new love of sourdough bread.
E
Oh, yeah.
A
And sourdough bread is quite trendy right now because sourdough is called an old bread. It's like one of the old yeasts that's going around. I don't know.
E
It's been trendy since COVID Really?
A
Everybody had a sourdough.
E
Everybody has sourdough starter.
A
Yeah. I love sourdough bread since the moment I taste.
E
Yeah, me too.
A
I love it. First time we tasted it was. I worked in a restaurant, and they had it, and I just. I'm all about it.
E
So. Good.
A
Yeah, I'll take it every time. But San Francisco, of course, is the home of sourdough bread. I think there were monks in San Francisco that used to make the sourdough bread, and then they would sell the yeast, the starter yeast. Guess where the next super bowl is going to be? San Francisco. And so Taylor started talking about that and then saying some other additional things, like 49,000. She dropped the. She dropped the number 49,000 for some reason. And I guess this is Super Bowl 49 or something like that is 51ers. 49ers. I'm sorry. Yeah, 49ers. And then she dropped another number, and it was the number of the super bowl that it was going to be. She dropped a lot of hints that these swifties picked up on, and there's whole reels that decode it. Like, you know, putting the string together, like the guy from It's Always Sunny, you know, just like, decoding that. And it appears that she's trying to allude that she's probably going to be this super bowl halftime entertainment show that's coming up January, which they have not announced yet. Of course, Ludicrous has been asking for a while for to be the halftime show. So. Sorry, Ludacris.
E
Yeah.
A
Not going to be you.
E
It's going to be anybody else will be bumped.
A
Who else?
E
If it's.
A
If Taylor's involved, name another artist that could Bump Taylor Swift?
E
I don't know one.
A
I don't know of one.
E
Beyonce would be the only other one that I think it's is her caliber.
A
If Whitney Houston came back from the grave, I think that's the only reason that they would bump Taylor Swift. If I'm being real honest, I don't think. I think that's the only thing that Roger Goodell wants to see in any of the corporate sponsors. And if she is the halftime show, then the dollar amounts for the advertising will be higher than they have ever been, probably by 15 or 20%, and the viewership will be the highest that it's ever been. Certainly for the halftime show, if not for the entire super bowl, that will be the event of the century. You know, listen, Taylor's does it again. If I were Taylor's PR people, as I've. As I've discussed before in the past, I would take a break. I would tell Taylor to take a break, take a year or two off and then get back to it. But, you know, I'm not her PR people and thank God I'm not because I'm the PR person for the commercial break. It hasn't worked out all that well.
E
So she's a creative person. She just keeps creating.
A
It's her high output time and she's out there high outputting, if you don't mind. Thirteen studio albums and she's only, what, 34 years old?
E
Something like that, yeah, something like that, yeah.
A
Wow. That's. That's a body. That's a body of work in. In the music industry. That's like putting together 900 episodes of a podcast.
E
It really is. And before that, she was just a songwriter. So, you know, there's a lot of people that have sung her songs.
A
I was just watching that last night as we're recording this last night. There's a country artist called Kane Brown. Not familiar with any of his work. I just learned about him this second, but he was playing a small club in Nashville and she showed up last night to play songs.
E
Oh, wow.
A
Kane Brown. And you can imagine the people who are in the audience like, that's. There is no bigger special motherload.
E
Jackpot.
A
Yes. That's not 33, Willie. Brian Green joins, you know, Corey Feldman on stage. That's not. Corey Feldman joins Limp Bizkit for a song that's. That's unbelievable in it. And I saw the video of it and as soon as she came out on stage, you couldn't see her if you were in the crowd because all you could See is the phone of somebody else. I mean, just. I understand. I totally get it. I get. In this circumstance, I totally get it. But still, if I'm there, I'm probably wanting to see Taylor Swift, like, you know, I'm probably wanted to go, oh, can I watch her actually sing the Fudgeing Song? But no chance of that. No chance of that. The second biggest thing that's happening in music right now is the Oasis comeback tour. I had tickets to go see them in Chicago. I gave them up because it just, unfortunately, it wasn't gonna work out. I don't have enough money to go see Oasis in Chicago. The hotel rooms are expensive, babysitters are expensive, flights are expensive, and we just can't take that much time off. We've already taken three vacations already this year. Here, it's a commercial break. We can't take another one. But I think that's happening in just a couple of days, actually, as this is being released. Well, I know.
E
Have they already started back? Because they were starting back in the UK, right?
A
July 4th was the first one, I think.
E
Okay.
A
I think in Wembley or Cardiff, one of the two. Wembley or Cardiff. And then they went over to Liverpool to do their hometown. And last night they were in. They played Crikey Stadium in Ireland. They played Dublin, which we tried to get tickets to also. That was one of the venues we wanted to go to in Dublin. I am really glad that I went to none of those, because I'm seeing videos of them, and it's just a sea of humanity. And everyone is soaked, and I don't mean soaked with the rain, I mean soaked with beer at Wembley. Imagine the first night they broke a record for draft beer sales at the Oasis show. They broke a record. They sold, like. I forget what it was, you know, 1 million gallons of draft beer or something like that. It was unbelievable. And every show has been packed, and I've watched now plenty of videos from those live shows. I think a couple of them will stream from here in the United States. But I've watched lots of videos from those shows, and those two guys sound like they did 25, 30 years ago. They sound great. They're tight, they sound good. They're putting on a show. They're coming out hand in hand, like, literally holding hands every night, giving each other.
E
I'd like to see the brotherly love that's come back.
A
I think it's great. I mean, it's. They're probably kicking themselves directly in the fucking asshole that they didn't, you know, get off their cocaine benders and make amends 20 years ago, because they would have continued to make this kind of money over and over again. But this really has made for some, like, high drama, high value reunion tour, and I think it might be go down as one of the best musical events of the year. Is. Did you go to the Oasis show? Because they. When you watch one of their videos, you know, some people have managed to cop together, cobble together most of the show, and when you watch an Oasis video, you may like or not like Oasis, but if you grew up in a certain time, they were all over the radio and all your friends had the albums and you had the albums, you realize that Oasis has a lot more songs that you like than you think they do.
E
Champagne Supernova.
A
Yeah, Champagne Supernova's not the only one. There is a they do.
E
I remember watching, like, a documentary on before they did all this whole tour of getting back together, and I was like, oh, yeah, they. They sung that too. That and that and that.
A
Yeah. Yes. I mean, you know, they're talented. And these songs are anthems. Over in Europe, they're anthems. Like, people will break out. And I saw a video of a bunch of people waiting. Ryanair is on strike or something. Bad weather. Ryanair is on strike. Bunch of people in one of the airports over there. I don't think it was Heathrow, but it was one of the airports over in. Over in England, in the UK, there's 500, 600 people crammed in this hall, like this big lobby, and they're all just sitting there, going nowhere. Some dude's got a boombox, right, and he puts on an Oasis song and all five or six hundred people go from miserable to sing along in 2.6 seconds. It was like an unbelievable reaction.
E
Well, music will do that.
A
Yes, it will.
E
You know, it'll change your mood entirely.
A
Yeah. And so for us here, Oasis is a great, you know, across the pond band that sang a lot of the songs that we love over there. That's their guys, you know, and they love them and they're part of the fabric. Like a lot of, you know, like, the Grateful Dead is here or something along those lines, or, you know, Billy Joel or John Cougar Mellencamp, who I figured out is kind of an asshole. I don't know if you knew that. Anyway, whatever. I don't care about John Cougar Mellock. I don't talk about him. He's old. Where is John Cougar Mellow Camp, smoking cigarettes, voting for Trump. I don't know, who knows? But. But Oasis is really part of the fabric over there.
E
They are.
A
And so they have been just on this incredible run of shows, sold out after sold out. As a matter of fact, in Croaky park last night. There's a old television show that I've talked about before on this show years ago that I got onto during the Pandemic. And it was a British show called the Royal Family, the Royal with an E Family. And it is a show about a fam that largely takes place, 90% of it, in the living room of a very lower middle class family in the uk. Dad is a cranky old man, but he's kind of funny. He's sweet in his own way. Right. And the mom is a doting mother of two children, one an adult woman, one a teenage son. And then the adult woman, the daughter is getting, you know, is getting engaged to another guy who's also a character in the show. And then one of the mothers is. Is the mother of one of. Of the wife of the show. Anyway, it's like this very small cast. It's. And largely what they do is they sit around, smoke cigarettes and watch television. And the interaction, the interplay between them is the show. There's not a lot of plot, there's not a lot of drama, there's not a lot of action, there's lots of funny moments, but all of a sudden you are involved and invested in the show and it is went down as one of the great, like the top five television shows of all time. In the uk it's called the Royal Family. It was back in the 90s. The theme song to that is one of the first Oasis songs that ever came out before they were famous. And it's called Half A World Away. And the song goes, you know, I love and I say it and I go away Half a world away Half a world away. It's the theme song. Yeah, round. But it's just acoustic. It's just acoustic. That's it. But they bought this song from the brothers early on and they. And it was their theme song for the four Seasons. They only. It was only on for four seasons. For the four Seasons. And Crocky park last night outside of the actual stadium, there's probably 30,000 people and Oasis is inside singing this song. And 30,000 people are up and down the streets crammed, singing the song along with them. Because it's a theme for them. It's one of their favorite television shows. It's a theme for them. Like if someone broke out you know, I don't know. Friends. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it was just unbelievable. It's like that. That's. That's. That there's power in that. That's unbelievable. You know, it really is. Yeah. It's like if we could get all our fans here in this room, which is about how many fans we have, seven could fit additionally in this room. And then, you know, South Georgia. Sean was outside sing, you know, singing the theme song along with us.
E
I love.
A
Was great. It was fantastic.
E
Well, good for Oasis.
A
Good for Oasis. They're killing it. Keep going, boys. You know, stay off. If you can just avoid a bender for a couple more months, you will have pulled it off. You will have pulled it off. I don't think they're sober. I don't think anybody there.
E
Yeah, they've got adult children now, too. I read a whole article with those four.
A
Yeah, their Twitter feeds are some of the. I'm still calling it Twitter, by the way. Elon. I don't care. Their Twitter feeds are some of the funniest. Like, they're really.
E
They're witty.
A
Yeah. They're sharp, they're witty. Yeah. They're smart kids. You know, they may be poor bumpkins from the wrong side of the tracks, but no one's ever claimed that they were stupid. They've. They've done very well for themselves.
E
Yes.
A
Speaking of poor bumpkin from the wrong side of the tracks, about two years ago, Chrissy and I reviewed a couple of sales training videos from a guy named Paul. And Paul gave us cold call. Paul cold call. Paul gave us this very famous drop that we used for a while. Oh, wait, hold on one second. That's his laugh. Paul would cold call people live on. Not live, but he would record himself cold calling people on YouTube. And we found whole videos of him doing this. And these people obviously didn't want to buy anything from him. And he would manage to, like, squirrel them into some agreement and he'd say, it's closed. Yeah, I closed it. He was really funny.
E
Can I go ahead and send you that contract? That's a close.
A
Yeah, he has to see the contract. That's a close. You're closed. It's a closed deal. He was really very optimistic about his. His abilities and he's continued to push out sales training videos. Chrissy, I just checked in on him while we were on a break from one of the episodes. I checked in on him. I thought, well, I think it's time, two years later, that we check on. Called Call Paul and see exactly what he's up to. I found a video where he's talking about how he uses the power of social media to convert leads into sales.
E
I can't wait to see this, as.
A
He calls it, martial arts sales. So let's do this. Why don't we take a break? We'll shift gears from music to sales and we'll see what Paul's up to.
E
I like it.
A
We'll be back.
C
Hey, you. Something about a TCB logo on a university sweater gets me hot in the pocket, if you know what I mean. What do you say we finish our drinks, go find a computer or go to shoptcbpodcast.com because I know they're selling some slinky gear, but only until August 22nd. And hey, a little vibrating rabbit told me that you get a free TCB sticker with every single purchase. There's nothing slinkier than a body draped in commercial brake gear. Piggy frontin ind. Hey, one more idea. When that gear gets dropped off at your front door, let's take everything else off. We'll put our smokin hot merch on. We'll take a picture and tag hecommercialbreak. Cause daddy loves a free thing or two. And I hear they might give away some additional merch. Boy, this is a game of ball in the pocket that I've been wanting to play all night long. Shoptcbpodcast.com but only till August 22nd. Now do me a favor. Put your credit card down for the bar tab. Cause they don't take dogecoin here. Then I'm a little short on the long scratch. Bye now.
A
This episode is brought to you by Squarespace. I'm out on our little break. I'm over at the local coffee shop and I'm talking to one of the people behind the counter. And they say, I want to start my own podcast. To which I reply, you already have more listeners than we do. But their question to me was, what do I need in order to launch a podcast? Three things. A microphone, an idea, and a website. And our good friends at Squarespace, they have the all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and sit succeed online. Whether you're creating content, selling something, offering a service, or just want to keep people informed about your comings and goings, you can build your website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place. And if a website is a building block of a business, what's the building blocks of the website? Two things, in my opinion. Number one, design. You gotta have a good looking design and Squarespace has a collection of cutting edge design tools that anyone can use to build a website that fits fits your brand perfectly. Number two building block. You have to be found. As I've often said about podcasting, if you want to be heard, you have to get found. No different out there on the world wide web. And search engine optimization is the key to doing that. While some companies and services may charge thousands or tens of thousands of dollars for search engine optimization, it's included with every single website on Squarespace. And the great news about all of this is you do not have to be some designer, programmer, search engine optimization expert. Squarespace is designed to help me build a website and if I can do it, you can do it. I'm really not all that smart. Go to squarespace.com commercial to save 10 off your purchase of a website or domain using the code commercial and start building your business or grow the one that you have or refresh that multi billion dollar conglomerate squarespace.com commercial and when you're ready to launch, make sure to use the code commercial and thank you to Squarespace for always being a sponsor of the commercial break.
B
Hello, it's Lena Dunham. I host a podcast called the C Word with my dearest friend and historian of bad behavior, Alyssa Bennett. What is up? It's a chat show about women whose society is called Crazy. We're going to be rediscovering the stories.
A
Of women's society dismissed by calling them.
B
Mad, sad or just plain bad. Listen to and follow the C Word with Lena Dunham and Alyssa Bennett. Available now wherever you get your podcasts.
A
Avoiding your unfinished home projects because you're not sure where to start. Thumbtack knows homes so you don't have to. Don't know the difference between matte paint finish and satin or what that clunking sound from your dryer is. With thumbtack, you don't have to be a home pro, you just have to hire one. You can hire top rated pros, see price estimates and read reviews all on the app. Download today. As mentioned before, I think it's been a couple years since we have reviewed a Paul sales training video. Cold call Paul. But here he is back in our humble little abode here, our own royal family living room here. Yes, you're watching us watch TV essentially, is what's going on in this show too. And let's take a listen to what he has to say about sales training or sales on the Internet or as he likes to call it, martial arts sales. Let's do this. Oh wait, hold on.
D
Welcome to the martial arts of sales. Are you excited? If you're not excited, I encourage you to watch this video and you gonna be excited after that. What I'm gonna talk about.
A
Wow, what a. You got me riled up, Paul. I'm ready to go.
E
He's full of energy.
A
He is full of energy. Not an infectious kind of energy but in a kind of energy. Like why am I going to be excited?
D
Paul, today it's a five part series but part number one, it's laid.
A
Nothing gets you excited like a five part series in sales training. Nothing quite like I'm on part one of five parts. Okay.
D
Foundation is how to use my social media investment strategy to convert more leads. It's a sale.
A
This is the kind of sales training Chrissy and I went through where. Oh yes, we would have to go to the bathroom five minutes in and we'd come back on the following Tuesday. Yeah, I had a meeting. I had to go check and see if the dry cleaner was ready to close and you know what they said two weeks from now, they're ready to sign.
D
Now for the introduction.
A
Now for the introduction. Oh God, he's got algebra up there or something.
E
Flying letters.
A
Yeah, he's got flying letters. Here's the video. Let me set it up, let me set the scene for you. Blank beige wall whiteboard with a lot of words on it that probably that already spelled boredom. That's an introduction. Oh, oh, oh. That's a loud.
E
And you gotta pump them up to get them started.
A
Wow. Yeah. That's the worst intro I have ever seen on YouTube.
E
Gosh, that's like. Could almost cause a seizure.
A
Yeah, that's terrible.
D
Hello everybody. Welcome to the martial arts.
A
Hello everybody. Hello kids. What are you doing? Smoking the cigarettes? Let me get in on that sales.
D
I hope everyone's doing well. I had a great day yesterday with my first workshop seminar. It went really well. I had a good turnout. You know, some mistakes were made at. That happens when it's your first event.
A
Some mistakes were made. I forgot to rent a space and get lunch or tell people what time it was started. But some mistakes are made but nothing.
D
Major and I'm happy about that. And hopefully that people left with something to think about that could help their business. If you're watching this on YouTube channel, just hit the subscribe button below. If you like it, smash the like button. And do share with others.
A
Why is everyone over 60? Say the word smash.
D
Now I have a five part series on how to generate more leads and convert more leads into sales.
A
And why do we keep our tie below our belt? That to me is like fashion faux pas numero uno. And I don't claim to be Louis Vuitton Chrissy, but I think it just looks bad to have your belt, to have your tie so long.
E
It looks like maybe he lost weight.
A
Yeah, he certainly does.
E
Maybe it was a little up.
A
Yeah.
E
Before that.
A
Maybe it was over his belly.
D
Previously on social media. We're going to start with the foundation and I started this system about a year and a half ago. It's working and it could also work for you. So I'm ready to put it.
E
It's just now working.
A
Yeah, it's working mildly in the sense that I figured out how to start the campaign.
D
And here's the best part about it has nothing to do with Facebook ad or Instagram ad or even boosting. This is about raw, real sales right in front of you that I'm going to show you how to pull them together.
A
I don't have to pay anything, I don't have to do anything on any of the social media platforms to invest in my social media strategy. I like where this is going. If you're saying to me, Paul, if what you're saying is true, let me repeat what you said. To use your social media strategy, you don't have to use any of the social media platforms currently available to us. I like this. I like where he's going.
E
Yeah, no, this is.
A
Yeah, this is the commercial break kind of social media strategy. Don't put anything on any social medias.
D
Now, how to use my social media investment strategy to convert more leads into sales. I'm going to tell you how I came up with that strategy. When I first.
A
Oh good.
D
Got into social media, I was resisting it, but I was persuaded to do it. And what I decided to do is like I always do, I do my research, I do my homework.
A
I was persuaded by a 22 year old Brazilian to send her some money to set up my social media. And after her mom and her cousin and her uncle also additionally convinced me to spend some money, I figured out that they were not in fact real. And now I have been persuaded to start my own social media account.
E
That was the research.
A
Yes.
D
I look into it, I start to dissect the analysis or the data and then I come to a point, where is this worth doing? Is there opportunities there? Can I create a solution to the major problems that are happening on social media? When the answer was, yeah, oh wow.
A
He'S created major he's created a solution to all the kids having trouble with their self esteem on social media, all the bullying. He. He identified an opportunity after dissecting and analyzing the data. Looking at the data, yes, that's exactly what we do here at the commercial break.
D
Also then I knew I had something, so I had to create a strategy that I can implement to be able to be successful. Number two, that it can help people.
A
Could we have put the whiteboard in front of the one fire alarm on the entire wall or could we have centered it to the camera?
E
Yeah.
A
Yes. Why are we off to the right here? This is driving me crazy. And why is he a power director? I don't know. Or is that the.
E
No, it does say power director in the bottom right.
A
Power director.
E
At least the letters quit.
A
Is that like power bottom, power top?
D
Yeah, power director, small business owners entre. And then salespeople to get more leads on social media and convert them. Before we get into it, I want you to understand this. There is more opportunities today to generate more sales than ever before. There are more qualified leads right now than ever before.
A
Said every sales trainer ever. Yes. Yes. Not true. Yes. Way more than there were before. Way more than they'll ever be. Today is prime time, Chrissy, for sales conversion on places like Facebook and MySpace.
D
Right in front of you, right next to your left, to your right, behind you, above you, all over you, all around you.
E
Yeah, Yep, yep.
D
There are opportunities. My job is to show you to identify those opportunities and take advantage of it. So by laying down the ground.
E
Why is he wearing a suit with the hat?
A
Well, you know, guys of a certain age, sometimes, Chrissy, they start thinning up top. And rather than go full, you know, nutsack like I did, yeah, they put a cap on and why not put.
E
A Mercedes looks like a Mercedes. Yeah.
A
Service advisor. That's what a service advisor wears at Mercedes Benz. I recognize strategy.
D
My background as a venture capitalist, so what I started doing.
E
Oh, I know that he's a venture capitalist.
A
Wasn't he selling lawn care services? Cold calling lawn care services?
E
Yes, he was.
A
He's a venture capitalist.
E
I didn't know that about him. Little tidbit.
A
Wow, I had no idea. Wow, he's a venture capitalist.
E
What qualifies you as that?
A
Yeah, you're a venture capitalist. Like I was a morning talk show host on radio.
D
Looking at all of these platforms from Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, LinkedIn, you know, the Better Business Bureau, Google, Yahoo, Bing, Alignable.
A
I invested in all of them. Bing. I was a major investor early on. In Bing, I convinced Andrew Andreessen Horowitz to spend $12 million on Bing.
D
Name it to me, they're all modern day pages except Twitter. Might be today's modern day telephone, but it's still a yellow pages.
A
Sounds like this. Honestly sounds like a search optimization speech from 2002. How do I know? Because that's what I was doing. Yep, that's what we were saying. Not 2002, 2005. For.
D
Why do I say that? What do they all have in common? They have information, whether it's a website, other social media outlets, telephone numbers, emails, names. Numbers.
A
Name it. It's there.
D
Right. So for me, that's more advantageous.
A
I'm following none of this.
E
Are you following advantageous to have the phone number? I guess, yes. Business.
A
But. Huh, huh. But how does that make it. How does that make those leads more qualified? Is what I. And how is Twitter the telephone of the social media? Can you call anybody on Twitter?
E
Part 5 of 5.
A
Can you call anybody on Twitter? I can't.
D
It is a different story. So that's how I look at it. The second part I look at is every platform. I look at it as a stock. Anyone who owns a mutual fund understand it's just a bunch of stocks in a mutual fund. So I take a social media mutual fund approach to doing business on social media, all right?
A
And I, I buy real estate on each platform. And to do that, I met another woman from Brazil who's selling social media stocks. And Now I have 50 million shares of each of the major social media telephone platforms, including Bing and. What's the other one, Chrissy? Vine.
E
Yeah.
D
That's why I named it Social Media investment strategy. You have to take it as an.
E
Investment.
D
Is organically and it's automated. I do the organic, which complements and offsets. Whatever you can do on the automated.
A
It offsets what you're doing.
E
Yeah.
A
Shouldn't this be additive? I. I don't know much about accounting, Chrissy, but I do know that one plus one is addition and not subtract.
D
Now let me show you how it works.
A
Great.
E
Yes.
A
Break out your phone. Let's see. Oh, no, go to the whiteboard. That's more instructive.
D
First thing you have to do to lay down the groundwork for the social media investment strategy is you must identify who your customers are. I know you probably hear that all the time.
A
Yes. Yeah. It's like 101 sales training. Yes.
D
Are you doing it?
A
No.
D
Here's what I mean by that. I know people and I have Spoken with people that have hundreds of thousands of followers.
A
No, you don't. Don't lie. Come on.
D
Alcohol, a lot of it is bots and they're not really converting leads into sale because they're looking at becoming popular, which is a necessary thing on social media.
E
He takes time into the stairs because.
A
He doesn't know what he's talking about. He's trying to make up the next thing he's got to say, but if.
D
Your target is 100,000 people, let's just say in your industry that's your target. Why would you target a million people?
E
I don't know what he's saying.
A
If Your target is 100,000 people, why would you target a million? To get to those hundred thousand.
E
Yeah, exactly.
A
Yeah. Just to guess.
D
It makes no sense. All you're doing is wasting time, especially if you're advertising and paying for it. So what I've learned to do is let me target who my audience is on social media and let me make sure that my services fits their needs or their wants or they have a problem that I have the solution for them.
A
Isn't that just marketing 101 though?
E
Advertising and marketing?
A
Yeah. Like if you're selling, you know, retirement living, you don't target 24 year olds. Right. Maybe you target 40 year olds whose parents are getting older and whatever, you get what I'm saying? But that's pretty basic stuff. But still, that's marketing, not sales.
E
Yeah, I mean, you've always had to identify who your customers are, but because what else do you do? There's no general message that just goes out, use my business.
A
Unless you're McDonald's and you're doing branding. But that's not sales. Branding is not sales. Okay, all right, so I'm trying to follow you here. I'm trying to. Doing my best, Chrissy.
D
That's what I mean about identify who your customers are. I know who my customers are and I target them all the time.
A
And how do you.
E
Give us an example.
A
Give us the example.
E
Yes.
D
Once you identify who your customers are and where they're at, the second thing you do is now you strategize the right content.
E
That's correct. This again is advertising 101.
A
You have to have the right message. That's number two.
D
Content is. This is. You should be original, authentic and be sincere.
A
Did you learn that as a venture capitalist?
E
I know, let me throw that in.
A
He went from Paul to Frankie V overnight.
D
So you should strategize it. Don't just post to post, because remember Your branding is pose to post.
A
Oh, baby, let's pose to post self.
D
Does that make sense?
E
No.
A
No.
D
Number three is you have to understand each platform.
A
Okay. All right, so. Okay, now tell us.
E
We're getting rid of all the basics.
A
Here, but I think we're getting close to a message here, Chrissy. I think we're getting some words that.
E
Are flying letters that. Yes, there's a number in there.
A
Yes. PowerPoint 1989 is sending. It's sending in some random letters. It's Taylor Swift. It's decoding a message. He knows how to do it. You got to have a mythology behind your brand.
D
There's a strategy to everything. And I'm talking about not worrying about Facebook ads or boosting or Instagram ad or boosting or promoting. I'm not talking about none of that.
A
That.
D
I'm talking about simple, fundamental, where you have to take the action from the old school. I take the action.
A
I'm from the old school. I don't pay for any of my advertising. I reach all two of my followers by posting on a yearly basis.
D
Do you have to understand. Understand each platform? If a platform is not working, what I do is I let it go especially for my customers.
A
What, before your customers? Oh, he lets it go before his customers. He's. He wants to be ahead of the curve, see if his customers are on Facebook. But he. It's not working for him. He lets it go before they jump off. Yeah, he's like, well, I got off first.
E
Yeah, he's a trendsetter. Remove yourself.
A
Yeah. And then he posts about it. I'm getting off Facebook before my customers do.
D
You gotta adjust to that. Don't fall in love with it. Don't allow social media to control your time, but use social media as a.
A
Social toilet flushing in the background. Sorry, Paul, I had to take a mean shit.
E
It is after lunch.
A
Yeah, well, you know, dumper's full. Paul, you got any wipes to generate your business?
D
And guess what? You don't have to wait a year like most people. Two years.
E
One to two years for what?
A
One to two years to post what? I don't understand.
E
And why do most people do that?
A
You don't have to wait one to two years like the commercial break did to get to 300 followers.
E
You can start now. Take action.
A
Feel free.
D
I waited a year because I was laying down my strategy.
A
Oh, I was laying it down. This is why he forgot we were all clamoring for Paul's Instagram page. But he had to lay down the strategy. That's, that's, it's a long. He's playing the long game here, Chrissy. He's not willy nilly getting an account, making a post. Yeah, he's strategizing a year. That's right. He's getting to understand where his customers are and he's leaving them before they can leave him. And then he's going to be original and authentic. But first he's got to figure out how to be original and authentic.
E
He's got to strategize on that.
A
He's got to pretend to be authentic. Original and authentic.
D
And I still did some business. Not as much as I would have liked to, but I knew the commitment I had to make and a sacrifice I have to make in order to build this strategy. And it's here now and it's going to blow your mind away.
E
Things are popping off, blow our minds.
A
Well, big promises coming from Paul here. Let's take a break. We're almost at the end of part one. We haven't even gotten to it. So I'm going to have to load up part two here. Anyway, let's take a break and we'll be back.
D
No, no, no, no, no, no.
E
You just let fly.
B
Let me do something Brian has never done.
A
Be brief.
B
Follow us on Instagram at the commercial break, text or call us 212-4333, tcb. That's 212-433-3822. Visit our website tcbpodcast.com for all the audio, video and your free sticker. Then watch all the videos@YouTube.com thecommercial break and finally share the show. It's the best gift you could give a few aging podcasters. See, Brian, that really wasn't that difficult now was it?
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A
Yeah, if Paul had taught us selling, then we would have sold a lot less. But we'd had a lot more fun doing it. Yeah. Because we would have been like, what is this guy talking about? The back of the room having fun. All right, we're back with Paul as he teaches us social media investment, martial arts strategy, culture, the kung fu VC investment strategy on social media.
D
And it works.
A
And it works.
D
Now, number four is you.
A
I thought that said erection. It says execution.
D
The call to action.
A
But you didn't even tell us what we need to do.
E
I know.
D
I mean by that. Once you have.
A
What do you mean by that?
D
Identify your customers. You have the right strategy. You understand each platform. Now you put a strategy together and you execute it. And you take the call to action means you comment on the clients you're talking.
E
Oh, he wants you to comment.
A
Don't worry about posting anything.
E
No, just.
A
I don't want you to post, Chrissy, because your clients, they're gonna leave in a minute. I want you to comment. Did you leave Facebook yet? Call me. I'm going to tell you about a new social media platform where I'm getting a lot of leads next door. You know Paul's on next door?
E
Oh, yeah.
A
You know, he's pitching his services somewhere on Nextdoor. He's probably. Most of the posts we talk about this so far is not a. Is not a sales training. Really. What it is is it's a collection. Buzzwords. Yeah. There's no meat to these potatoes.
D
You start a dialogue with them, you follow them.
A
You like them, you basically scare them into buying from.
E
I thought we were supposed to post authentically.
A
Yes, but.
E
Okay, but then you comment.
A
It's at. Before the restraining order.
E
Yeah.
A
And after you jump off social media. Yeah. Before they do, you have to follow them. Comment, dial their phone number, get their address, docs them.
D
All those things are important. They are your responsibility to take the first call to action. And I'll leave you with this. Everyone is trying to sell someone something. There's nothing wrong with that. I just know this. I'm not going to target a company that I know. I don't need the services. Why Will, wait.
A
You know, you. You don't need their services. Are we selling or are we buying?
E
I don't I think both. I don't know.
A
I thought this was how to get more sales leads, not how to buy something online. Huh. Maybe we got a. Maybe. Maybe we got in the wrong sales training here.
D
But I know that they're going to need my services more than I'm going to need theirs, and you gotta identify that.
A
Oh. Oh, okay.
E
Oh, Paul, Maybe I will. I'm not gonna comment. Well, maybe I will, but they need my services more.
A
I'm gonna follow a company. I don't need their services. They're gonna need my services. What the is going on? I'm on social media trying to identify people who need me more than I need them. Okay. All right. Hey, listen, I didn't have a whole lot of success in saying maybe. This is why.
E
Yeah, we weren't listening to Paul.
A
Yeah. I needed to be at more strip clubs telling those girls, you need my dick more than I need yours. Oh.
D
Because in their mind, if you're calling them, that means you're interested in their services. You see my point?
E
So what about. What about acting authentic?
A
Yeah. Throw that out the window.
E
Yeah.
A
And step four, throw everything away that I just said. Now you're buying something to get them.
E
You're pretending.
A
You're pretending to buy something, and then you say, but touche. What if I had something you wanted more?
D
I mean, about understanding your customer, having the right strategy? So that's what I do.
A
Okay. All right. I think this is the wrong strategy.
E
Yeah. No wonder it's taking you years.
A
Yeah, years. Get on to social media because you were laying down the stress.
D
Yeah.
E
You were commenting.
A
Yeah. Finally it's working.
D
Call them, and I follow up with them. I'm gonna have a conversation how I can help.
E
Hey, did you see my comment?
A
Yeah. Hey, I just commented on your wife's photograph of your kids, and I just called to say you need me more than I need you.
D
How can I help them convert more of these into sales? That's my job. That should be your job. And that's my social media investment strategy. This is just. Just the. The simplicity of it. There's more to it than that.
A
I like how his eyes dart left and right. He's like, what do I say next?
D
And I'll go further into it in the next video.
A
Oh, you better. Oh, you better.
D
One or part one of part five.
A
Part one of part five. Okay.
D
Thank you for watching. I hope this has been helpful to you. Again, if you're watching me on YouTube, it's been confusing.
A
It's.
D
Hit the like button.
A
I I think we've, I think we've understand less now than we did before, but. Okay, we're gonna give you the benefit of the doubt. Let's roll into part two. Oh, Chrissy, I could see us spending the entire week on this. This is really funny. All right, here's part two. We're not gonna get a whole bunch into this, but we'll, we'll get. Oh, he changed off the hat. Yeah.
E
Oh, he did change his whole outfit.
A
Yeah, he changed his whole outfit stay too. And by the way, that's not the same hair he just had.
E
Well, no, he had a hat on.
A
But he had long hair in the back and it's gone. Okay, so was that a wig under the hat or what's going on?
E
It was one of those mullet hats.
A
Yeah, that's true. You know, makes you look a little younger.
D
Guys. Welcome to the Martial Arts of Sale. This is part two of a five part series on how to use my strategy called social media investment strategy to accomplish three things. Number one, get the right leads on all of your social media platforms. They're there, there and they're ready to be closed.
A
Number two, apparently not.
D
It's increasing your conversion ratio wherever it's at. My strategy is going to help you increase your conversion ratio. Number three, it will help you increase your monthly cash flow. Part two is the art of cold calling on all of your social.
E
Okay, here we go.
A
Here we go. Okay, finally we're getting into something we can use.
E
The art of cold calling.
A
Cold calling on your social media platforms. Nothing like picking up the phone and dialing through Instagram.
D
Exciting. Ready now for the introduction?
E
Oh, oh, oh, no, no, no, no, no.
A
Yeah, that's too loud and obnoxious and it gives me a headache. All right, I'm gonna move through. Oh, sorry.
D
Hello, everybody. How's everybody doing? Are you excited? I'm excited to share what I've learned over the years to share with you so that you can increase your revenues in your business. Welcome to the Martial Arts of Sale. This is part two of a five part series. It's gonna be absolutely exciting. Now what I'm gonna ask of you is this.
E
Are those dress pants? Cargo pants too? There's. Yeah, she's got something attached down on either leg.
A
I think those are pants for his nighttime security job. I don't know. Is that a gun or a microphone? I'm not sure.
D
On YouTube you like the video smash the like button also. Subscribe. Just hit the button below. Subscription and do share with others. Thank you for Doing that. Now, I want you to keep an open mind. Part two, you may resist a little bit, but keep an open mind.
A
How much more I could resist from part one, But. Okay.
D
Is the art of cold calling on all of. All of your social media platform. That's right. You didn't hear wrong. The art of cold calling on all social media platforms. Now, before we get into it, some of you know that I've been cold calling for 30 years.
A
I thought you were a VC.
E
Yeah, no, he started off VC, but that didn't work out.
A
Okay, all right, I get it. Sometimes you're a VC and you like to get back to your roots. You want to get away from the yachts and the, you know, the money. Yeah. The threesomes and the money and the cocaine. And get back to calling the rented office in my.
D
And I challenged myself and people have challenged me saying that cold calling is obsolete and that cold calling doesn't work on social media. I'm here to tell you that that's a bunch of bs.
A
I don't even know how you call someone on social media, but okay.
D
Small opportunities to.
E
Is it commenting?
A
Yeah, I think it's commenting is what he's trying to say.
D
And get more quality leads and deals than ever ever before, ever, ever, ever.
A
Ever, ever, ever, ever, forever, ever, ever.
D
So keep an open mind. Mind cold calling on social media. I'm going to give you the five steps you need to understand so that you could be successful.
E
What makes this martial arts?
A
His cargo.
E
Yeah. He's wearing a black belt.
A
Yeah.
D
Media platform. Let's go to work, guys. Number one is you have to have a plan of attack.
E
Oh, gosh. Okay.
D
What do I mean by that? That one of the things that I've learned is I'm always a strategist. I'm always strategizing before I take action.
A
Strategic.
D
I need to know the direction. When you have a plan of attack on social media, you have to understand this. A lot of people that on social media and pay for great content and graphic design and things like that have a lot of followers. They're very well educated on social media.
A
They have a lot of followers that comments and likes and shares. Not me, not me. I go the opposite direction. I say the less followers, the better.
D
They understand the intricacy if you look like a bot.
A
Yeah, that's what, that's what I'm. I'm all about that. I like to follow you, comment on your media. I like the AI girls with big boobs talk nasty to me.
D
A lot of Views a lot of likes, but a lot of them are not really generating business because social media is more about a long term player and it's really more about becoming popular and recognized and being influential. But most of the time you're not making money. For me, I'm not waiting a year or two years.
A
You just said it takes one or two years.
D
Popular or anything like that. I don't care about that. What I do care about is the strategy and executing that strategy so I could generate revenue. Because at the end of the day, would you rather wait a year to make a sale or would you rather make sales every single day and every single month?
A
Boom.
E
That's a comment.
A
Boom. Comment. Fail.
E
If they, I guarantee you, if they respond back to him, that's, that's a sale. That's a sale.
A
That's a sale. You know, you don't know how many of those AI girls respond right back to you. Think about that when someone says comment on the post below and I'll send you a link to my free training. I get a, I have 100% close ratio on having a conversation.
D
So I'm going to give you a little twist. The plan of action is this. You must know who your audience is. You must know how to target them. You must know.
E
That's not a twist.
A
That's not a twist. No, no.
D
They need your services and your products.
E
You have to understand a roundhouse kick.
A
That's a roundhouse kick to the sales face what I am. You have to know that you need their services but they need yours more.
D
On social media, whether it's on their content, whether it's directory, the whatever it is, it's your job to know that when you take action with this follower or this person that actually likes your content.
E
Oh well, now we're going back to the following. Who's following you?
A
Paul, we just watched the video one minute ago. You might want to watch the. Unlike the commercial break, you might want to go back and actually figure out what you were talking about.
D
Comments on it. No matter what the case is, if you're going to go after them for potential business, you better know who they are. You better have a plan of attack. Always have a plan of attack. Why? Because number two, you have to make sure once you have that plan of attack guy and you take the action that when you get a hold of them that you have value.
A
Do I have value?
E
Hit that whiteboard.
A
Smack it. These are literally words on a white buzzwords on a whiteboard. And he's trying to connect the dots. There is no strategy about this whatsoever. I've been to a lot of sales trainings, some of them pretty bad. But this, this is air. This is literal thin air. He is giving. No. I love you, Paul. You're my brother.
E
I know. He's lovable.
A
You're lovable, you're a lovable guy. But this is gobbly gook. This is really gobbly gook.
D
Cuz it's easy to like something.
A
It's easy, it's easy to like you, but it's harder to want to buy anything you're selling.
D
Comment on it or follow it or share it. There's no skin in the game, there's no emotional attachment to it.
A
It.
D
But the minute you take that action from the plan of attack and you start to pursue business, it's a whole different ball game. You're going to get a lot of resistance. Yeah, I learned.
A
What is he doing? He's like swaying back and forth, looking left or right. Yeah.
D
Long time ago when I was getting into social media, you know, I was telling people, I said, listen, why aren't you going after.
A
A long time ago when you were getting into social media, you said you just got into social media business.
D
Because they were waiting for business to come to them because they have everything. Automated. For me personally, I don't really concern myself.
E
Automated. I think what he's calling automated is paid.
A
Yes. Okay, yeah. Automated. Like, yeah, they run the ads.
D
What I do concern myself about is going out there and grabbing business, attacking it.
E
That's the martial art.
A
Grabbing it by the balls.
D
But I want to make sure when I do that that I am value, I have value to offer when I do that.
A
Because if I have example, I know that's the problem is that there's no, there's no actual there there. If that makes sense.
D
The other thing is this. You also have to understand that the people you're going after, you're targeting, they're going to want to sell you their services as well. Nothing wrong with that. Sometimes you what?
A
No, I've never been in a sales call. Maybe once at a dealership, but I've never been in a sales call where someone tried to sell me their services. Oh, that sex shop one time.
E
That's right.
D
We bought her a deal. For me is. I look at it this way, if I don't.
A
I look at it this way, if you're gonna. If I'm gonna buy something from you and you're gonna buy for something from me, let's make it of equal value. So we both benefit the same amount of money out of the transaction, that product.
D
But I like what they're doing. I'm gonna like them if I believe I can help that business grow and I have a service that can help them. I'm gonna go after them. They may not be able to sell me what they have because I may not need it, but most people need what I have. Most of you out there, you strong business owners, entrepreneur and salespeople. I have something that you guys need.
E
As this riveting sales train.
A
Yeah. Cargo pants.
D
That's why I go after it.
A
Hi.
D
Because I have value. I make sure of that. Number three.
E
He's not proving it in this video demonstration.
A
He's got to give one example part. Yeah. You know what I've found about teaching, just in general, and I'm not, I don't think I'm a world class teacher of any everything. But one of the things that I found about teaching other little humans and other people how to do stuff, you must be instructive.
E
Yes.
A
You must have details. You must give an example. You must connect the dots with something you did in your life so you can give them something they can sink their teeth into when they're trying to do it on their own. Like, oh, Brian told me that story about how he went out and did this. How he took these people to the strip club and then bought a lot of cocaine and then had them sign the contract at the end of the night.
E
Yeah, yeah.
D
To make sure that you understand the customers you're going after and targeting, that they have a problem that they may be aware about or that they don't know they have. But you better make sure that you have the solutions. Not hypothetical, not giving gibberish.
E
What you're doing.
A
That is rich coming from you, my friend.
D
A real solution. Tension to their problems. Because if you don't, you're not different.
A
Exactly.
D
Always be authentic, always be genuine and.
E
Except when you're pretending to lie.
A
Except for when you're pretending to be a VC who has a master's degree in social media and you're trying to sell your sales training services.
E
Yeah.
A
Based on no sales experience whatsoever. I mean, we've seen him cold call people, so we know he at least knows how to do that. I can't say with what degree of success because, you know, you can pick and choose which phone calls you put on online. But let's put it this way. If Paul has put the best he has to offer in cold calling on his YouTube channel.
E
Yeah.
A
Then I'M not sure the skills are there. I'm not sure. Oh, he was trying to sell. Remember that one video we did?
E
Oh, yeah.
A
He was trying to sell someone.
E
It was lawn something.
A
Yeah. The lawn care. But then the next one, he was trying to sell someone, like a. A listing.
E
Yes.
A
On an online directory. Yes. A website for $10 or something. For 500.
E
Yeah.
A
Hey, listen, you gotta admire the hustle.
E
I do.
A
You gotta admire the hustle. At the end of the day, I appreciate anyone who's trying to do it. Even if you don't have much. Excite. We know how that feels. We know how that feels.
E
Commiserate.
A
Been there, done that. All right, maybe we'll follow up on that. This. We could probably get all through all five videos this week and just have fun with it because this is funny to me. This really is. And if you've never been in sales, I think you can even still understand, you know, we've all been in sales. We've all had to sell some ideas.
E
Some degree or another.
A
Sell a husband on you being his wife. Sell a girlfriend on you being his boyfriend. You know how it goes. It's all. We've all been that. All right, just a couple more days left of the shop tcb podcast.com merch website. It's going to be open until midnight Friday. Then it closes and we will not be able to sell that merch ever again. So please do go there. Pick yourself up a hat, a hoodie, a T shirt, a university sweater, and get a free and exclusive TCB sticker with every single purchase. Those are only available if you order the merch. If you don't order the merch, sorry, we don't have any luck. We don't have any available. What else? Tcbpodcast.com all the audio, all the video right there at one location. More information about Chrissy and I. And a free sticker, but not the one you get with the merch. 212-433-3TCB 212-433-3822 questions, comments, concerns, content, Ideas? Add the commercial break on instagram@YouTube.com the commercial break for all the episodes the same day. They air here on the audio. That's all I can do today, Chrissy.
E
I think so.
A
I love you.
E
And I love you.
A
Best to you and best you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, we will see say we do say and we must say goodbye.
B
Planning a trip this year. Imagine how much richer your travel experience could be if you could speak the local language. Whether you're traveling abroad, planning a staycation, or just shaking up your routine, what better time to dive into a new language? With Rosetta Stone, you'll gain the confidence to have real conversations and create deeper connections wherever you go. Rosetta Stone is the trusted leader in language learning for over 30 years. Their immersive, intuitive method helps you naturally absorb and retain your new language on desktop or mobile, whenever and wherever it fits your summer schedule. With 30 years of experience, millions of users, and 25 languages to choose from, Rosetta Stone is the go to tool for real language growth. Don't wait. Unlock your language learning potential now. Listeners of this podcast can grab Rosetta Stone's lifetime membership for 50% off. That's unlimited access to 25 language courses for life. Visit RosettaStone.com RS10 to get started and claim your 50% off today. Don't miss out. Go to Rosetta Stone.com RS10 and start learning today. Hi, I'm Kristen Bell and if you know my husband Dax, then you also know he loves shopping for a car. Selling a car? Not so much.
A
We're really doing this, huh?
B
Thankfully, Carvana makes it easy. Answer a few questions, put in your van or license and done. We sold ours in min morning and they'll come pick it up and pay us this afternoon.
D
Goodbye Truckee.
B
Of course, we kept the favorite.
A
Hello other Truckee.
B
Sell your car with Carvana today. Terms and conditions apply out here. It's not only the amazing views, but the way time stretches out a little longer and how the breeze hits just right at the summit. With all trails, you can discover nature's best with over 450,000 trails around the world. Download the free app today. No one knows your business better than you, so who better to create your website than, well, you? Wix's website builder puts it all in your hands. Create a beautiful website just by talking with AI or choosing from thousands of templates. Customize every detail with simple drag and drop tools and get everything you need to start running business your way. Build more, think bigger and do it all yourself on Wix. Go to wix.com.
Release Date: August 20, 2025
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley
In this episode, Bryan and Krissy dive back into the wild world of “Cold Call Paul,” a uniquely enthusiastic sales trainer whose unorthodox techniques and signature style once captivated the TCB duo (and, let’s be honest, confused them too). The episode juggles irreverent reviews of Paul’s latest “Martial Arts of Sales” series with the duo’s chaotic banter on pop culture, fandoms, and their own DIY podcasting journey. Expect sharp-witted improvisation, affectionate roastings, and the self-aware comedy that has made The Commercial Break “just FINE”—and fun.
The episode is a classic TCB romp: a send-up of self-serious internet sales gurus (Cold Call Paul), affectionate takedowns of pop culture excess (Taylor Swift, Oasis), and inside jokes about their own podcast’s underdog status. While Paul’s sales wisdom fails to deliver real value (“This is gobbly gook”—Bryan, 65:20), it delivers classic TCB content: fast quips, snarky commentary, and a sense that you’re hanging out with two very funny friends at the Cheesecake Factory of Comedy Podcasts.
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