Gustavo: A Venezuelan Love Story

Summary

The Commercial Break — "Gustavo: A Venezuelan Love Story" (January 18, 2025)

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Episode Overview

In this special Saturday episode of The Commercial Break, hosts Bryan Green and Krissy Hoadley celebrate the U.S. vs Venezuela international soccer match with a lively, impromptu deep-dive into Venezuelan-American family life. The focus is on Bryan’s brother-in-law, Gustavo—“international man of mystery”—who joins for a vulnerable, funny, and heartfelt exploration of cultural entanglement, love across borders, and what it takes to be accepted into a Venezuelan family. There’s good-natured teasing, language gaffes, touching memories, and lots of laughter as the episode meanders from family tales to must-know Venezuelan slang and the delicious chaos of intercultural relationships.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Meet Gustavo: The Man, the Myth, the Appetite

• Gustavo, Bryan’s (very tall) brother-in-law, joins the show. Bryan teases about having to increase his grocery budget when Gustavo visits, referencing Gustavo’s ability to eat an entire family-size box of cereal in one sitting.
  • [02:28] “He eats me out of house and home every time he comes.”—Bryan
  • [03:21] “He’s a big boy...I think he’s like 25 years old. But when do men stop growing—30?”—Bryan
• Discussion moves to Gustavo’s recent engagement to Ale, his high school sweetheart, and the longevity of their relationship.
  • [04:02] “They’ve been together since they were like in high school. So...high school sweethearts. Gustavo comes here over...Love Story. It is kind of a love story.” — Brya

2. On Long-Term Love & the ‘Cosmic’ Nature of Connections

• The hosts question whether soulmates are predetermined and whether relationships extend across lifetimes — echoing themes from multiverse theory, but with comic, acid-trip undertones.
  • [06:18] “I think...in this multiverse theory that I have in my head that’s kind of crazy and based on many LSD trips, I think that it’s possible that, like, Astrid could have been my brother in a different universe...” — Bryan
• Bryan and Krissy reflect on the weirdness and wonder of having found their partners (or lifelong friends) across countries and circumstances, noting improbable family links between U.S. and Venezuela in both of their backgrounds.

3. Family, Culture, and Becoming ‘Venezuelan’

• Venezuelan family structure and warmth is celebrated. Gustavo notes how quickly newcomers are welcomed and expected to take part in gatherings:

  • [25:37] “Expect to meet family members early on and be prepared for family gatherings at a regular pace.” — Bryan quoting AI
  • [25:59] “Like, we hang out together. And when someone comes to the family, you better become part of the family.” — Gustavo

• Bryan recalls his first nights with Venezuelan friends, being shoehorned into sleeping arrangements, and mistaking hospitality for romantic interest:

  • [28:05] “I jump in the bed and a couple of minutes later, I hear the door open...Raphael slides under the covers and I jumped out of that bed so fucking fast…” — Bryan
  • [29:41] “We treat everyone as a family member.” — Gustavo

• The extended family in action: Up to 20 people at Bryan’s home during weddings, air mattresses scattered everywhere, and the cheerful, chaotic inclusion of everyone—and anyone—related or not.

4. Language, Slang, & Cultural Comedy

• Gustavo quizzes Bryan on essential Venezuelan slang:

  • [18:02] “What is chevre?” — Gustavo
    • Bryan: “That’s cool, that’s awesome.”
  • [18:42] “What is a roomba?”
    • Bryan: “It’s the thing that cleans your floor.”
    • Gustavo: “Roomba could be any party.”
  • [19:27] “Konaso?”
    • Bryan (guessing): “A spanking...a beating?”
    • Gustavo: “That’s right. That’s why I always ask for it.”

• Self-deprecating stories about Bryan’s adventures (and failures) in learning Spanish and navigating Venezuelan accents, such as confusing “este” (“this”) with “ecte,” or pronouncing “nosotros” (“we”) awkwardly in class:

  • [21:46] “It was like, nos otros.” — Gustavo, teasing Bryan’s mispronunciations
  • [22:02] “She was about to give you a con yasa.” — Gustavo

• Bryan admits Venezuelan social gatherings are overwhelming for an American not used to rapid, overlapping, multi-tongued conversations:

  • [51:04] “First of all, can you guys stop fucking talking over each other just for one second?...everyone is having six different conversations at the same time. How do you even operate in that manner?” — Bryan

5. Venezuelan Cuisine, Likes & Dislikes

• Detailed, humorous rundown of Venezuelan food traditions, including:
  • Tequeños: “my favorite Venezuelan import”—Bryan
  • Cachapas: “like going and getting a really good corn on the cob and then smearing it with salted butter. And it’s so delicious and juicy and wonderful. And then you put on top of that, the white cheese.” — Bryan [43:43]
  • Pabellón: Gustavo’s favorite, explained as “shredded meat, plantains, beans, and rice.”
• Bryan’s honest (and polarizing) take on ayacas: can’t stand them due to the raisins, and finds plantains out of place with savory food.
  • [36:40] “The only food...that Astrid has ever introduced me to that I don’t care for...I just generally don’t like the ayakas.” — Bryan

6. Music, Dance, and Pop Culture Touchstones

• Both get into favorite Venezuelan musical styles, from merengue to reggaeton, and the cultural importance of music and dance:

  • [33:19] “Music and dance?” — Bryan
    • Gustavo: “Oh, a lot. Yeah...Reggaeton, salsa, merengue.”

• Brief tangent on American influences (Taylor Swift) and Bryan’s pride over having hosted reggaeton star Nicky Jam.

• Nostalgic discussion about Venezuelan TV and the famous show Radio Rochella as a cultural anchor for family gatherings:

  • [54:41] “Radio Rochella.” — Gustavo
    • “It was like a TV show made of all funny sketches...all families were like waiting for this TV show to start.”

7. On Displacement, Diaspora, and Social Life

• Bryan and Gustavo reflect on the Venezuelan diaspora, the necessity of family connection in exile, and how it shapes their sense of “home”:
  • [48:24] “Venezuelans are a displaced people...most of them. And now many Venezuelans, most of them—it’s kind of in a brain drain—is the displaced people also. It is so important to keep that connection through socialization of family.” — Bryan
  • [48:28] “Because Venezuelans, we were, like, kind of forced to move all around the globe.” — Gustavo
• Bryan compares his own American/Irish family’s culture, emphasizing the absence of lingering, overnight stays, and how he’s come to appreciate the warmth and chaos of Venezuelan gatherings.

8. Safety, Travel, and Hope for Venezuela’s Future

• Towards the close, the pair briefly touch on Venezuela’s political situation and hopes for positive change.
  • [57:02] “This time the person who supposedly won was recognized by a lot of democratic countries.”—Gustavo
  • Bryan expresses a hope that his children will be able one day to experience Venezuela with family, underscoring the importance of cultural identity and heritage.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments (w/Timestamps)

• “I have to put an extra $300 in the grocery budget.” – Bryan, on Gustavo’s visit [02:38]
• “Can you imagine getting married to your high school sweetheart?” – Bryan [04:26]
• “I was doing too much cocaine to really, like, go through that growth spurt where I ate a ton of food in one sitting.” – Bryan [03:13]
• “The universal language of thirst trap.” – Bryan [08:30]
• “Like, my world and Astrid's collided, which is weird. And Jeff showed up as your next door neighbor.” – Bryan [07:21]
• “I think if we had gotten married it would have been a hot train wreck of a marriage.” – Bryan, on not marrying his high school sweetheart [04:40]
• “True or false: I am now the most famous Venezuelan you know right now.” – Bryan [17:12]
• “What is chevre?” – Gustavo [17:57]
• “You are not chevre. I'm a 48-year-old white guy.” – Bryan [18:33]
• “I just generally don’t like the ayakas.” – Bryan [36:55]
• “This is like Waffle House. What's...I had no understanding of Venezuela.” – Bryan, on his first Venezuelan sleepover [27:30]
• “We treat everyone as a family member.” – Gustavo [29:49]
• “The biggest blessing you can give a child is the longing for connection with family.” – Bryan [50:10]
• “How can you guys stop fucking talking over each other? ...Everybody is having six different conversations at the same time.” – Bryan [51:04]
• “Just when I think I've got it pinned down, now I have...restored faith in humanity.” – Bryan [56:10]
• “Viva Venezuela Libre!” – Bryan [57:15]

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Key Segment Timestamps

• [00:42] – Introduction to the special episode, the Venezuela-USA soccer match, and Gustavo
• [03:23] – Gustavo’s engagement and long-term relationship
• [06:18] – Multiverse, ‘soulmate’ theories & cosmic connections
• [10:22] – Hidden links between U.S. and Venezuela in family history
• [17:14]–[19:44] – Venezuelan slang quiz (chevre, roomba, konaso)
• [26:20]–[32:52] – The importance of family and personal stories of hospitality, “becoming family”
• [43:00]–[46:46] – Venezuelan cuisine, traitorous gringo taste buds
• [51:04]–[52:59] – Surviving (and loving) the chaotic Venezuelan group conversation
• [54:41] – Venezuelan TV memories: Radio Rochella
• [56:10] – Reflections on longing and hope for Venezuela
• [58:32]–[59:30] – Concluding appreciations and Gustavo’s cameo wrap-up

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Tone & Style

The episode is a seamless mix of irreverence and sincerity, constantly veering between Bryan’s deadpan self-deprecation and the affectionate ribbing characteristic of old friends and family. The conversational flow is loose and improvisational, with plenty of playful interruptions, cultural misunderstandings, and heartfelt moments.

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For Listeners Who Missed the Episode

• Expect a riot of cultural quirks: food, family, and fiestas, told through the lens of a blended Venezuelan-American family.
• There’s real insight into how welcoming (and demanding) Venezuelan families can be, especially for “adopted” outsiders like Bryan.
• The episode is rich with stories of marriage proposals thwarted by ‘not wanting to go to the waterfall’ and the chaos of sleeping arrangements in a full house.
• Language gaps and cultural learning are played up for laughs, but there’s genuine respect and admiration at the core.
• The show closes on hope for Venezuela and for family unity, wherever in the world that might be.

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Best to you, best to you out there in the podcast universe!

Transcript

[Unknown Speaker]

Alan, this is my dad, my mom, Niavela. And that's Diego, my cousin who isn't related to me.

[Brian]

Hi.

[Chris]

It's so nice to meet you guys.

[Brian]

Gringo alert. Yeah.

[Chris]

Hablo un poco de espanol.

[Brian]

But, you know, I was a little distracted in high school Spanish, so. Well, you just need to fuck us. What was that?

[Chris]

On this episode of the commercial break, I am now the most famous Venezuelan.

[Brian]

You know right now.

[Chris]

Right now.

[Brian]

You.

[Chris]

Yes. That you know. That you personally know.

[Brian]

Maybe you can be Venezuelan, but you have to answer me, like three important words for Venezuela.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Brian]

Do you think you know the meaning of three words for Venezuela?

[Chris]

You give me the words and I'll see if I understand them.

[Brian]

Okay? What? I'll go easy on you on the first one. If you don't know the first one, I'll stand up and I'll leave the.

[Chris]

I'm not making it into Venezuela. All right. Okay.

[Brian]

The next episode of the commercial break starts now.

[Chris]

Yeah. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is the chica to my gringo, Chris and Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chris.

[Gustavo]

Best to you, Brian.

[Chris]

Best to you. Out there in the podcast universe, a special Saturday episode of the commercial break. Because you didn't ask, but we're giving it to you anyway. Celebrating the very first international match here in the Miami stadium of Venezuela versus the United States this afternoon, 3:00pm I think you can watch it on Max TNT and a couple other places.

[Gustavo]

That's big.

[Chris]

So here we are giving you a special episode to celebrate this very unique meeting of two lovely countries, the United States and Venezuela. Soon to be much more similar than ever before now crunchier than before, 20% more. Venezuela. We're here in the studio on this special day again. We decided to put this out on Saturday because the Venezuela USA match is happening today. And we've got a very special guest here at the house, my brother in law, Gustavo. Gustavo, international man of mystery Gustavo. He's an international man of mystery.

[Gustavo]

Seven foot tall.

[Chris]

Seven and a half feet tall. We actually have to adjust the camera angle to get him all in. I'm not sure the whole curtain gets it. He is really tall. He's a big boy.

[Gustavo]

I love it.

[Chris]

And he eats me out of house and home every time he comes. Every time he comes here to my house, I tell Astrid that we have to put an extra $300 in the grocery budget. And here's a couple of reasons why Gustavo will sit. Like I know I have a Bad cream and cereal addiction that rears its ugly head from time to time, Usually in the winter, because I can hide it with clothing. Gustavo will sit and eat an entire family box of family sized box of cereal in one sitting, which is amazing to me. I don't even. I think I was doing too much cocaine to really, like, go through that gross spurt where I ate a ton of food in one sitting. But it still amazes me that any human being can sit and eat as much food as Gustavo.

[Gustavo]

And he's a growing boy.

[Chris]

He's a growing boy. I think he's like 25 years old. But when do men stop growing 30?

[Gustavo]

I don't know.

[Chris]

When do we stop growing 30 and women stop growing at like 26 or something like that? Something like. And then we start shrinking. Our dicks get smaller, our ears get larger, our nose hair gets longer, and we get smellier and less intelligent. Women just age gracefully through the years. And that's how it goes. Gustavo is a huge boy. And it's just the amount of food that he eats is immense, Chrissy. It's immense. But he's here. He's celebrating the engagement. The recent engagement.

[Gustavo]

Congratulations.

[Chris]

With his lovely fiance, Ale, who has been. I mean, as long as I've. They have been together. I think I mentioned this on the show before. They've been together 12 years. 12 years. So he was three when they met or something like that. I can't do the math real quick, but they've been together since they were like in high school. So. High school sweethearts. Gustavo comes here over Love Story. It is kind of a love story. Can you imagine getting married to your high school sweetheart?

[Gustavo]

Yeah. I don't know. No, I cannot.

[Chris]

Chrissy goes, yeah, I can.

[Gustavo]

I mean, I can picture it for some people, but for me, I am glad that I did not marry my high school sweetheart.

[Chris]

I really still to this day have an affinity for my high school sweetheart. But I don't see us being married. I think if we had gotten married, it would have been a hot train wreck of a marriage. But she turned out to be a lovely human being. And I still communicate sometimes with her.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Gustavo]

Jeff's parents had been together since kindergarten.

[Chris]

No.

[Gustavo]

Yeah. Grew up together. Were together together together until.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Really?

[Gustavo]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Kindergarten. Isn't that weird?

[Gustavo]

The moms were friends and so then they got to know each other that way. And yeah, they've known each other since kindergarten. Obviously they weren't boyfriend and girlfriend in kindergarten, but they knew each other and were friends from. From. From kindergarten. And Then they, that blossomed into a love and into a mar. Three wonderful boys from it.

[Chris]

When was your first boyfriend? When did you have like, your first, like, boy that you would come home and like a crush, you know, like, like a grade school crush?

[Gustavo]

Fourth or fifth grade.

[Chris]

Fourth or fifth grade? You waited a while. I think I was in first or second grade. I can still remember the name of the girl. I mean, I won't say it here on air, but I can still remember the name of the girl. And here's the funny thing, like, I'm not gonna say it. Never mind. I, I, I'll, I'll tell it to you off air. I, I don't want to start family drama, so I'm not gonna start family drama, but okay. Fourth or fifth grade. Yeah, I mean, listen, do you believe that if you have a best friend or a soulmate like Jeff or whatever it is, do you believe that it's possible you all were connected in a different. Yes, you know, time frame, universe, multiverse, whatever, wrinkle in time, and then you had to find each other or you found each other?

[Gustavo]

I think so.

[Chris]

I think so too. Yeah. Someone you knew in a past life. It freaks me out to think about that because I think it's very possible in this multiverse theory that I have in my head that's kind of crazy and based on many LSD trips, I think that it's possible that, like, Astrid could have been my brother in a different universe, or my best friend, or a dog that I like very much, or we were both possums or something like that. Do you know what I'm saying? I think it's possible that it's, it wasn't about some love story that continued like romantic love story. Could have been something else altogether. A friend, a brother.

[Gustavo]

You just recognize that soul.

[Chris]

You recognize them. And so it's amazing to me as we talk about Venezuela and the United States, it's amazing to me that I found my soulmate, even though she was many countries away, like completely somewhere else, doing something else, on a different trajectory than I was. And then our world's collided, which is weird. And Jeff showed up as your next door neighbor.

[Gustavo]

He did? Yeah. And when we first started talking and getting to know each other, we realized we had a ton of people in common, a ton of friends in common and places that we had been at the same time.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Gustavo]

Together. And we just never had met.

[Chris]

Yeah. So when you think about this, it's either the multiverse theory or Jeff and Chrissy are Ross and Rachel One of the two, when you think about it. I mean, that's kind of strange. I think this same thing about, like, my. Some of my best friends like you. Maybe we were connected in a different life somehow, some way.

[Gustavo]

I think so, because we definitely recognized each other. I think when we first met.

[Chris]

We did. I had seen your name on the wall, and so I. And a picture, and I said, that's Chrissy Hoadley. Or what I affectionately refer to as just Hoadley Doadley. Yeah. So amazing to think about all the different ways we are entangled. And Astrid and I, you know, obviously two different countries, two different experiences, two different cultures. All those things kind of washed away when we met each other. And the love story persisted. And Gustavo.

[Gustavo]

The language of love. The universal language of love.

[Chris]

The universal language of thirst Trap. Yes, that's right, Brian. The universal language of.

[Gustavo]

I'm just glad that what your heart wanted this time was correct.

[Chris]

I think even in the worst of relationships, you're still drawn to that person for some reason. They have to teach you a lesson. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Gustavo]

That's true.

[Chris]

So, like, you know, I had Nacho Potato the dog before. When Astrid and I met, she got me a dog, I think mainly to keep me in the house for some. You know, I had to come home to feed the dog. She was smart. She was smart in that way. She said, let me get the guy a dog. And that way he can't be out being a dog. He has to go take care of the dog. I put Nacho Potato down because he was a danger to himself and other people. I've told that story on air. It was a terrible. It was one of the most heartbreaking things I've ever done, actually. And, yeah, that gives me, like, a chill just to think about it. But anyway, then a year later, we get Blue. And so part of me believes that Blue is just Nacho Potato ruining the rest of my life for making that terrible decision to put him down in that particular life. He has come back to haunt me in the form of a female. We call her a Yorkie, but I don't think that is trailer park Yorkie. Blue the trailer park Yorkie. And so. And in some way, I think that Venezuelans in general, at least for me personally, Venezuelans in general were meant to be a part of my life. That culture has taught me some things that maybe I missed because of the. Where I was born and the household I grew up in. No fault. No fault of theirs, because they're a product of the way that they grew up and.

[Gustavo]

Well, and weirdly, another connection, you know, is that when you first started dating Astrid and, you know, were telling me where she was from, that is where my dad lived.

[Chris]

That's right. When he was young, he lived in Caracas.

[Gustavo]

He did.

[Chris]

That's so strange.

[Gustavo]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Why did. Why was your dad living in Caracas?

[Gustavo]

Because my grandfather was in the oil business. Was. Yes, in the oil business. He was a geologist.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Gustavo]

So they lived in Venezuela. That's where my dad was born. And then they lived in Africa and different parts of the world.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Gustavo]

Through that.

[Chris]

Your dad had an interesting upbringing. He did, yeah. And it's not strange that there's a lot of Venezuelans here in Atlanta either, because Georgia Tech is a place where a lot of Venezuelans went to school to learn about engineering for the oil business. And then, you know, the Venezuela. I think the government would sponsor them to go to some of these more technical schools to learn some of this stuff so they could bring that knowledge back and drill for the oil out there, which has made that country very rich. And I'm not going to get into the politics, because there is the politics of talking about politics about Venezuela, and we do still have family down there. But, you know, it's just. It's. It's all like. It just seems weird to me now that I look back on it after some time, now that I'm in my late 70s.

[Gustavo]

I look, reflect.

[Chris]

I'm reflecting on my life, and I'm thinking about all the different ways that Venezuela, like the word Venezuela and the Venezuelan culture kind of made a Runway up to where I am today, including just being placed here in Atlanta. Like, it's just kind of weird. And so, yeah, so I think we've been trying to do this for a long time.

[Gustavo]

He has finally nabbed him.

[Chris]

Been scared shitless.

[Gustavo]

We were like, you're doing it.

[Chris]

I'm doing it. Only after we had that reel go viral did Gustavo make the decision that he wanted to come on, because he said, well, I want followers, too. So after a long time of poking and prodding Gustavo, we have finally gotten him to agree to come on the show. He's a highly interesting young man, currently living in Houston and going to school with his fiance, Ale. Why don't we do this? Let's take a short break, if it's okay with you. Chrissy has volunteered to give my chair. Give the chair up. And this is not because we don't want Chrissy here. This is because, honestly, we are. We are so technically challenged in the first place, adding another microphone and a chair. No, no, no, no. Let's just pretend. Let's just pretend it's Chrissy for a minute. So Chrissy's going to step out. When we get back. It'll be Gustavo and I chitting and chatting about all things Venezuela. And I think you'll find that conversation interesting. And if you don't, fuck you. Go watch the game after this. All right, we'll be back.

[Unknown Speaker]

I have a wild idea. Go to our Instagram and follow us he commercial break and then go to our TikTok and follow us therecb podcast and then go to our YouTube YouTube.com the commercial break and follow us there and then text us at 212-4333 TCB and tell us that you followed us on all of those other places. And then go to our website tcbpodcast.com and browse, I guess. Well, those are all the ideas I have for today, so see you tomorrow.

[Chris]

And now Chrissy has stepped out of the room so that we can have a just a chat, him and I, because I think he's a little bit nervous. He doesn't want a crowd here.

[Brian]

Absolutely.

[Chris]

But the very lovely, always welcome in my studio. Probably the first commercial break fan ever, I would assume. Yeah, Gustavo. He's even got a song about him here on the show.

[Brian]

And that's right, Gustavo, officially the man of mysteries here.

[Chris]

You are a man of mystery in a lot of ways like you and I find you to be mysterious. There are something you such an open book in so many ways. There's really not a lot to be hidden. But then in other ways, you are a complete mystery to me. Here's a mystery that I have that I've shared with the listeners on the show. But now that you're here. This is my brother in law, by the way. It's talked about a lot on the show.

[Brian]

You better be careful.

[Chris]

Yeah, I know. Who do you think would win if you and I got in an argument? Who do you think your sister would favor?

[Brian]

Matthias? She will run away.

[Chris]

It's probably a smart thing to do actually. I wouldn't pick sides either. I'd be like, I'm out of this one, I'm out of this one.

[Brian]

That's what she would do.

[Chris]

You were here over Thanksgiving and you had a engagement ring burning a hole in your pocket. You didn't help me and yet you didn't ask me for help.

[Brian]

You didn't sell my signs.

[Chris]

What song?

[Brian]

You couldn't say that in front of my Fiance.

[Chris]

You couldn't have just pulled me?

[Brian]

I was telling you.

[Chris]

What were you thinking about giving me the ring finger? Like this?

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

He was dropping secret notes in my late night cereal and cream bowl and I just didn't get it. I ate them.

[Brian]

So you can check your phone. You can answer me.

[Chris]

How? First of all, congratulations on the engagement. Thank you so much. Ali is a wonderful woman and you're lucky to have her. You're lucky.

[Brian]

You have.

[Chris]

What's that? Because I know you. Because I know you and I know her. You know, there's a saying in English. You've outclassed it. Right. You've.

[Brian]

I don't know what it means.

[Chris]

Oh, you married up. You're going to marry up. So to speak. And I hope I get a good place at the wedding. I just want a front row seat to see if this actually.

[Brian]

It'll depend after this. This episode.

[Chris]

Okay. We'll see how that goes.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

How did you. How did you ask LA to marry you? Is the question. Is the. Is the question. That's burning. Everybody's.

[Brian]

Okay. So we went to a lake really close to our.

[Chris]

Our place in Texas.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

A beautiful lake, which I had.

[Chris]

What's the name of the lake? Do you even remember? Do you even know it has a.

[Brian]

Silly name like something. Lake Brian, Something like that. It's like, Brian. It wasn't. Your honor.

[Chris]

Thank you. I appreciate it.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

So as most lakes in.

[Brian]

So I had to work a lot for that.

[Chris]

Yeah. Because.

[Brian]

Yeah. I had to invite her like 20 times.

[Chris]

You had to invite her 20 times? She didn't send my invitations.

[Brian]

I was going to do it.

[Chris]

You were going to do it here?

[Brian]

Yeah. But Astrid and her, like, they both were like, why are you gonna go there?

[Chris]

That's like, so.

[Brian]

You're so romantic. We don't love. We don't like that shit anymore.

[Chris]

So I think this is the funniest story. I really do. Gustavo's. Gustavo's here. And Gustavo is. His intention is to get Ale to the waterfall, which is quite beautiful, by the way. To get her to the waterfall so he can romantically propose to her in a natural setting, you know, by themselves. Like a Roman having a romantic moment.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

But Gustavo cannot convince Ale to go. And Aster does him no favors because she's also like, ah. Why do you want to go there? It's cold. It's cold. No one wants to go there.

[Brian]

They prefer to play board games with me.

[Chris]

You could have asked her right there at the board games. Well, congratulations. In Any congratulations? You're now here in the United States on the student visa program. We'll see how long. We'll see how long you get to stay. Yeah, but I'm rooting for you. I'm rooting for you. I'm rooting for you. I'm rooting for me also. Yeah.

[Brian]

Sometimes I have some doubts about me.

[Chris]

Yeah, well, I have some doubts about whether or not you're gonna stay past January 21st. We'll see how it happens. So, you know, true or false, I am now the most famous Venezuelan you.

[Brian]

Know right now, right?

[Chris]

Yes. That you know. That you personally know.

[Brian]

Maybe you can be Venezuelan, but you have to answer me, like three important words.

[Chris]

Okay?

[Brian]

So that.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Brian]

Do you think you know the meaning of. Of three words?

[Chris]

You give me the words and I'll see if I understand them.

[Brian]

Okay? What? I'll go easy on you on the first one.

[Chris]

Are these slang words? Do you know what slang means?

[Brian]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Yeah, yeah. If you don't know the first one, I'll stand up and I'll leave the room.

[Chris]

I'm not in. I'm not making it into Venezuela. All right.

[Brian]

Okay. What is chevre? And give me a sentence.

[Chris]

Chevre. Chevre. Chevre.

[Brian]

Yeah. Yeah, Right? Yeah. Uncle Google.

[Chris]

No.

[Brian]

Chevre omen.

[Chris]

How do I use it in a sentence? Let's say that we went to the Braves game. Okay. Right. And the Braves won. I would be like, man, that's jevre, Right?

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

That's cool. That's awesome. Congratulations. Like, we did. Like, it was awesome.

[Brian]

Okay.

[Chris]

Is that fair enough?

[Brian]

Yeah. You are not chevre.

[Chris]

No, that's right. No. I'm a 48 year old white guy.

[Brian]

That's right. Correct.

[Chris]

You're good. I haven't been chevre in 10 years.

[Brian]

You're good.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Brian]

What is a Roomba?

[Chris]

It's the thing that cleans your floor.

[Brian]

Roomba on your wedding?

[Chris]

Yes.

[Brian]

After the, like the official wedding, the ceremony, we had a Roomba.

[Chris]

A Roomba's like a little get together with cocktails, a little informal party or a formal party.

[Brian]

A really good party.

[Chris]

A really good party. Oh, a really good party. Like a. Like a hoedown, A jam.

[Brian]

I don't know if you passed that one. I think.

[Chris]

No, I don't think I pass that one. No, I honestly thought Roomba was the thing that closed. No, I thought Roomba was like. I didn't think it was a party. Yeah, I thought it was like a festival. I thought Roomba was like going to a festival.

[Brian]

Roomba could Be any. Like, any party.

[Chris]

Okay. All right, all right. Give me another one.

[Brian]

The last one. That's easy. One of your girls know this word really well. Konaso.

[Chris]

Cognac. I don't know. I have no idea what.

[Brian]

I'll give you a cognac if you don't behave. That's what we always say.

[Chris]

A spanking, like a hitting, like a slapping. A beating. Yeah. So means a beating.

[Brian]

That's right. Really? Yeah.

[Chris]

Like I'm gonna. You. And I'm.

[Brian]

That's why. That's why I always ask for it. Yes, to you. Like, I'm gonna give you a. It's not a gift. Yeah.

[Chris]

I think the first Venezuelan slang that I. Okay. So you know Raphael.

[Brian]

Yeah, of course.

[Chris]

Raphael's mother is my cousin only. Yeah, well, he's your cousin. Yeah, he's your cousin. Raphael. Just to put the. Like, the kind of the family tree together for those listening. Raphael is my best friend. Is kind of the connection. The reason why I met Astrid and Raphael and I have been friends for 30, almost 30 years. Raphael's mother, I would listen to her. She was like, one of the first Venezuelans that I knew besides Raphael. And she's, like, from Venezuela, right? Really? From Venezuela. Spent most of her life there. She used this word, ecte. Do you know. Do you know what this means?

[Brian]

I think you forgot the real word. No.

[Chris]

So listen, here's the story. So then I. So then I would go around when I was using Spanish, and I would say to Raphael, and he was like, why are you using that dumb word? What does that mean, dude? And I go, doesn't it mean okay? And he goes, no, that's my mom's terrible way of saying este. She says, esteban.

[Brian]

This.

[Chris]

This.

[Brian]

Okay.

[Chris]

Which is a word that she would use to like. Like a punctuation on something like this. You know what I'm saying?

[Brian]

Sounds a lot like you speak in Spanish.

[Chris]

That's metach Iban, I think.

[Brian]

Can you explain what nosotros is?

[Chris]

No.

[Brian]

You have a good story with that one.

[Chris]

Tell me the story about nosotros.

[Brian]

So you were on Spanish classes, right?

[Chris]

I was. I did take Spanish classes for a while.

[Brian]

For, like, two hours.

[Chris]

For two hours a day.

[Brian]

Because that teacher was, like, hard. Like, she was explaining in the Venezuelan way.

[Chris]

She was very difficult. Yes.

[Brian]

So you understood the. The word no, but you couldn't pronounce.

[Chris]

Oh, that's right. You're reminding me.

[Brian]

It was like, nos otros.

[Chris]

So I would say noso, which means we. Right? So I would say nos otros.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

And she would go, it's not otros. Do I say bright end? Do I go, brian, that's not how you say it.

[Brian]

She was about to give you a con yasa.

[Chris]

Oh, she was insisting, Gustavo, this lady was insane.

[Brian]

Yeah. Remember? I remember you came scared.

[Chris]

I was scared of glasses. And the thing was, is we were.

[Brian]

In this with your. With your notebook with only no such was reading on the first day.

[Chris]

And it's like a child's Spanish book, right? She's giving, like, these children's workbooks. And here's the craziest thing about this lady. We would meet at a Starbucks most of the time, because when we met at the library for a while, but she was so loud and aggressive that the librarian asked us, get out of the table. Take it somewhere else. So then I would get a Kinnyasson or whatever. I would get it at the Starbucks.

[Brian]

Those were your days, trying to convince Sasri that you were interested in Venezuela.

[Chris]

Now I've just given up altogether. Now I speak English, and the Venezuelans like me more. What's going on? I tried to speak Spanish to get in with the Venezuelans. They didn't accept me. Now I speak English and they love me or hate me, I guess, depending on. On what it is.

[Brian]

That's right. You better be careful.

[Chris]

So, you know, I didn't have AI when I first met Astrid.

[Brian]

The what?

[Chris]

AI like ChatGPT.

[Brian]

Oh, yeah. No, I didn't know. That's new for you.

[Chris]

I don't even think the iPhone existed when I met it. So when I met Astrid, you know that one of the first things that I. That I wrote her is basically a Spanish sentence.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

On Facebook.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

It said, hey, amiga. You know, hola, amiga.

[Brian]

Did someone help you or you know Google Translate?

[Chris]

No, I don't even think that I knew what Google Translate was at the time. I think I went to the Internet and searched out the words that I wanted to say, the words I didn't know in Spanish. And when I put those words together, it apparently sounded so incredibly dumb that Astrid responded.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

She was like, listen, I speak English. You don't need to speak Spanish.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

But one of the. If I had known, and I think I found Google Translate pretty quickly after that. But had AI been around.

[Brian]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

I think I probably would have gotten with your sister a lot.

[Brian]

It'll be much more easier.

[Chris]

It would have been much easier.

[Brian]

Well, you're a good, like, speaker. How do you say that? In Minnesota, we say Lavia.

[Chris]

Lavia?

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Like bullshit. Flowing out of my mouth like a volcano.

[Brian]

No, but. But in a good way. You know, like when you. When you want the confidence of the people like you Eng. Easily speaking.

[Chris]

Yes, it.

[Brian]

I think you have that talent.

[Chris]

I think in English you would either say affable or like, you might be referred to as a people person.

[Brian]

Okay.

[Chris]

Yeah, but I think that's kind of dumb because I don't know too many people that aren't people persons, you know, like, who doesn't like people? Who doesn't have at least that one other person?

[Brian]

I know some people that don't like people.

[Chris]

So, yeah, listen, you take me to place like Great Wolf Lodge, and I quickly don't like people.

[Brian]

Yeah, that's right.

[Chris]

That's it.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

So I asked. So I asked Chat GPT earlier today. I said, hey, Chat GPT. It's not really Chat GPT. It's a different one. But I'm not going to say the name here on air because they're not the sponsor. It's like Chat GPT and I. What's that?

[Brian]

It starts with.

[Chris]

No, I'll show it to you. After you. I said, hey, if I'm dating someone from Venezuela and I want to know who they are, like, I want to. I want to impress them, what are some of the things I need to know about to impress them? That's good, right? And so they put out a list of things, and I think it's pretty dead on. I want to share it with you. This is 20 things. We'll go through a few. Number one, family values. Family is extremely important to the Venezuelan culture.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

Expect to meet family members early on and be prepared for family gatherings at a regular pace. What it doesn't say is prepare three or four extra bedrooms in your house for a nice flow of Venezuelan.

[Brian]

That's what I was going to say. Like, you know about that. That's true. That's totally true. Venezuelans, we love to hang out with our family. We're like a whole group together always.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Brian]

Like, we hang out together. And when someone comes to the family, you better become part of the family.

[Chris]

You have to become part of the family. It's it. And I think that is why, quite frankly, I feel so indebted and ingrained in the Venezuelan culture, is because when I met Raphael early on. Here's the story. You ready?

[Brian]

Yep.

[Chris]

Raphael and I met at a restaurant.

[Brian]

Okay.

[Chris]

I was working at one restaurant, he was working at the other. They were the same restaurant, two different locations, two little Italian restaurants. The owner wanted him to come work at the one over where I was working. And I'd been working at this restaurant for like four or five months. Didn't know Rafael, Never met him. He comes over, he's sitting at the end of the bar, I'm bartending. Quickly, we strike up a conversation and fast forward to six or seven hours later. We are incredibly intoxicated at the bar across the street. And his grandparents, where he was living at the time, lived in the townhouse behind that bar, like half a mile behind the bar. So the bar closes 3, 4 in the morning, bar closes. We are 30 drinks into it. I mean, we are just shithoused. And I'm like, I got to call a cab home. And he's like, no, fuck that dude. Let's. We'll go to this gas station, we'll grab a six pack of beer, we'll go to where I. To my grandparents house, where I live place. So I said, oh, your grandparents are gonna let me stay there? And he said, my grandparents, they wouldn't have it any other way. You need to come to my grandparents house. They'll cook us food.

[Brian]

And I was like, they'll be happy if you go there.

[Chris]

I go, this is like Waffle House. What's I no understanding of Venezuela?

[Brian]

Kind of. Kind of, yeah.

[Chris]

We walk to the, to the townhouse, we open up the door. We're trying to be quiet so as not to wake up his grandparents. We go up these little stairs, we turn the corner, he opens the door. There's a bed, TV fan. Looks perfect for me, right? Place where I can sleep. The little bit of air blowing on my face and the tv. So he says, go ahead, brother, go ahead, go to bed. I'm gonna go brush my teeth and stuff. And I'm like, cool, bro, see you later. Good night. He's like, good night, bro. And I jump in the bed and I jump in the bed. And a couple of minutes later, I hear the door open.

[Brian]

You woke up the grandpa because he was sleeping on the bed.

[Chris]

I hear the door open. Didn't think anything of it. Maybe somebody forgot something. They don't know me. Us Irish people, we just play dead. We're like possums. So someone comes in, we just play dead.

[Brian]

We're like, that's what you do in that situation? Yeah, you just don't move.

[Chris]

That's what I do with Astrid. A lot of times I just play dead. I hope that she doesn't realize.

[Brian]

Your eyes with your phone.

[Chris]

Raphael slides under the covers and I jumped out of that bed so fucking fast. I jumped out of that bed. And I go, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And he goes, what's wrong? And I go, dude, dude, it's not like this. And he goes, like what? And I go, it's not like this. Like, I'm sorry. I think you got the wrong impression.

[Brian]

First, I need to go to the. To the movies or something.

[Chris]

You need to take me out on a date. You lured me here with food and grandparents, and now you're trying to. I don't know what you're trying to do. And he was like, dude, don't freak out. And I was like, can I just please use the phone? I just need to call a cab. And I left. I literally left at like 6 in the morning. Left. And that was a shame because when I was leaving, his abuela was making arepas for us to eat because she heard us.

[Brian]

That's very mean of you.

[Chris]

It was beautiful. It was wonderful.

[Brian]

That was very mean of you. How. How can you not trust a Venezuelan A dude?

[Chris]

If you were in the same situation, what would you have done?

[Brian]

He was using a beautiful piano.

[Chris]

I know.

[Brian]

You should have to trust him.

[Chris]

He came in like two, three, four days later. He came in for his first day of work. And he was, you know, Rafa. He was like, dude, what's your problem? And I go, what's your problem, bro? I go, you. We didn't even. I didn't know you were gay. He goes, gay? What are you fucking talking about? I'm not gay.

[Brian]

That's what we do.

[Chris]

Yeah. He said, we're Venezuelan.

[Brian]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Chris]

How many? How many? He goes, what do you think? Did that look like a mansion to you? Do you think we had a bunch of bedrooms? He's like, you're sleeping in my bed.

[Brian]

We treat everyone as a family member.

[Chris]

That's right.

[Brian]

So. Yeah.

[Chris]

And you treated me like a family member since day one.

[Brian]

Well, yeah.

[Chris]

And we almost slept in the same bed too.

[Brian]

Yeah. You took me. You took me on a Jet Ski. Yeah.

[Chris]

So I had to treat you like a Jet Ski. When. When Gustavo and I first met, we went down to Aruba.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And.

[Brian]

And you had a couple of beers on.

[Chris]

I had 12 beers. Because before you there. Yes.

[Brian]

I didn't know I had like, that. That appearance.

[Chris]

You, I wasn't so worried about. It was more your father, who Astrid had warned me about. And to be fair, your dad had kind of freaked out.

[Brian]

At least if I was you, I'll do the same. Yeah, totally. With my dad. I know my dad's an intimidating man. That's the, the, the other part of Venezuelans, like we are very nice, but sometimes coming from Europe, some people, it's a machismo culture. Yeah.

[Chris]

And the men in the family are the men in the family.

[Brian]

The only girl in the only girl.

[Chris]

In the family that all, you know.

[Brian]

And this guy from America's going to.

[Chris]

Say this old bald guy.

[Brian]

Yes. Texting in Facebook, sending me message. Hi, Dad.

[Chris]

Y still to this day, number one phrase your dad says when he's at this house.

[Brian]

Yeah. Brian, be careful. Yeah.

[Chris]

When we went to Aruba, we. Out of respect and because I'm Irish Catholic. And I think this is, this is like a universal thing for fathers, no matter what religion you're in. I understood that I would not be sleeping in the same bed as Astrid. That certainly wasn't going to happen. We were just dating. Not, you know, not engaged, nothing. And so Astro slept on the couch and then Gustavo and I slept in these two single beds in this second bedroom.

[Brian]

Yeah. My dad told me, like, you better watch this guy.

[Chris]

Did he really did. He said, keep an eye on me.

[Brian]

No, I'm just kidding. Just kidding.

[Chris]

But every morning his dad would come in, he would knock on the door and like eight, you know, seven o' clock in the morning, knock on the door, he'd open it up and he'd be like, I go davo. I go davo.

[Brian]

Yeah, I get that. And Brian. And Brian, you better wake up.

[Chris]

He's looking for a drinking buddy.

[Brian]

Yes. Still does that till these days.

[Chris]

I think the other thing that it's important to know around family values and the family, the kind of the Venezuelan ever expanding family, the extended family, is the fact that if you're married to a Venezuelan or if you're with a Venezuelan, you better be ready.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

For any and all family members to be in your space at all times. When Astrid started inviting, you know.

[Brian]

Oh yeah.

[Chris]

All family members to the house, I, I already understood this was gonna happen because of Raphael's family. And I've never complained. Not once. Not once. I've always.

[Brian]

We were speaking about it like on the wedding. We had like 20 people in this house. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We had like the air mattresses.

[Chris]

Mattresses all around the house, futons, couches. There were people sleeping in the attic. Yeah, I think there was someone. I, I think some dude came in.

[Brian]

Hey, Brian, is Rafael again.

[Chris]

Hey, Brian. Hey, Chamo. Hola, Chamo.

[Brian]

Yeah, that's right. That's right.

[Chris]

This AI application also tells me that there's Warmth and affection with the Venezuelan people. They tend to be warm and affectionate. Public displays of affection are common and expressing feelings openly is appreciated. I think it's generally true. I don't think it's, like, universally true, but I think it's generally true. You guys like to give a high hug?

[Brian]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

High five.

[Brian]

We like to touch each other and. Yeah. Hang out. Kisses, hugs.

[Chris]

Yes. Music and dance.

[Brian]

Oh, a lot. Yeah. You're every kind of music.

[Chris]

Yeah. You're always.

[Brian]

Mostly Latin music. Reggaeton, salsa, merengue.

[Chris]

What's your favorite? That country. Venezuelan country music that you like.

[Brian]

The one you were listening to yesterday. That's not my favorite. I like some, but my favorite will be, like, meringue, I think.

[Chris]

Merengue?

[Brian]

Yeah, meringue. There was a mix between merenga and reggaeton, which was really nice. You know Chino and Nacho.

[Chris]

Nacho Potato.

[Brian]

Yeah, that's right. The ones. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was a great duo. Yeah, they did a lot of great music.

[Chris]

I think we went and saw Nacho did Astronaut.

[Brian]

You went well, I think as we saw Nacho. You were on your phone watching Pearl Jam or something.

[Chris]

It wasn't. I actually watched it. He's taking me a number of Venezuelan concerts. I've enjoyed all of them. I went and saw the brother. Five brothers. What are they? The five guys? The Backstreet Boys of the Boss base.

[Brian]

Yeah. That's really good.

[Chris]

Yes. And then I saw the old guy up in Chicago. The very famous Venezuelan. The very famous old guy who sings, like, ballads and love songs. And I asked her. Will have to tell you who it is.

[Brian]

You don't remember the name?

[Chris]

I don't remember the name.

[Brian]

The old guy.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

Simon. Yeah.

[Chris]

Simone. Is that his name?

[Brian]

One of the most famous Venezuelan famous singers.

[Chris]

I think you might be right about that. I have no idea.

[Brian]

No, no. I don't think it was. Google Tsimon, Reggaeton, reggaeton and merengue.

[Chris]

Yeah. You're into reggaeton?

[Brian]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah. What's your. Who's your favorite reggaeton?

[Brian]

Reggaeton singer?

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

You had it here in the TV show.

[Chris]

You don't know how I was proud.

[Brian]

Of Brian for the first time in my life when he had Nicky Jam.

[Chris]

This is a moment of great pride for Gustavo. As a matter of fact, I don't think Nicky Jam would have even been on.

[Brian]

Actually, my favorite is, like, Nicky Jam, Whizzy and Dell.

[Chris]

Like Daddy Yankee.

[Brian]

Yeah, and Daddy Yankee. Those were, like, the real creators of reggaeton. But right now I like a lot of reggaetons.

[Chris]

Are you guys getting into American music? I mean, I know you're into a lot of American. You know, Taylor Swift and. Oh, yeah.

[Brian]

Yeah. I'm a Swiftie right now. You made me a Swiftie. This house.

[Chris]

This house will make you a Swift.

[Brian]

Yeah. You enter here, everybody's crazy about Taylor Swift. I really like country music.

[Chris]

No. Every.

[Brian]

Every time I go hunting, we play some country music, which is really nice.

[Chris]

But, you know, country music in America is not really country anymore. Are you listening to, like, the newer country music?

[Brian]

You know, I can't even tell you what I like. I like the. The rhythm and.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Brian]

And the songs.

[Chris]

I like a lot of country music.

[Brian]

I also really like rock, but not, like heavy metal stuff. Like, I. I get. I got to know, like, Michael Jackson.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

Be like, gather into reggaeton.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Into rock this year, this last year, Michael Jackson. So I started to understand that I. I like some rock music.

[Chris]

Michael Jackson is more pop music, but it has some. It does have rock elements into it. It's got hard. It's got guitars, it's got solos and stuff like that. One of the other things that's very important to the Venezuelans, if you're. If you find yourself looking to date a Venezuela, by the way, some of the most beautiful human beings in the world are Venezuelans. The women there are beautiful.

[Brian]

You're saying that because of your wife.

[Chris]

I'm definitely saying that because my wife.

[Brian]

You don't want a konyasa after you finish the show.

[Chris]

I don't want to be spending the night in Raphael's bed. But the cuisine, of course, is important, too. You've got your ayakas.

[Brian]

Yeah. You've got your panda, your favorites, the ayakas.

[Chris]

I. I just can't stand them. I don't know. Why do you have to put raisins in it? Why raisins?

[Brian]

You put a little bit of everything and everyone has to touch it.

[Chris]

Do you like raisins in your. In your ayakas? I'm talking to Ali off camera. You like raisins in the.

[Brian]

I eat everything.

[Chris]

I know you do, but you're a young man. You're growing.

[Brian]

When I was, like, very young, I didn't like raisins or olives. But right now I just understand. You have to eat it all, and it's good.

[Chris]

I had this conversation with Joanna Houseman, and she said, I don't like the mix either. I don't like.

[Brian]

Yeah, yeah.

[Chris]

It's not for everyone, but I. But it's it reminds me of home.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

And for that reason I like it. Is the Ayakas kind of throw out the garbage food. Like let's take all the stuff we have left over.

[Brian]

No, no. Families spend a lot of time like cooking.

[Chris]

No, I know they do, but did it like originate as kind of like a throw out the garbage food? You don't know?

[Brian]

I, I, I know a story from, from my school. I know if true. But some, some like Indians from Venezuela. How do you say native? Native. Venezuelans.

[Chris]

Indigenous. Indigenous.

[Brian]

So they used to have like the plantain live. And they will ask like their, they were slaves. So they were asking like their people like a. Yeah. There. AKA so like they will start putting some food on the leave.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

And so that's what they told us on school. I don't know.

[Chris]

That was like, that's like the. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brian]

They were start using the, the, the plants.

[Chris]

Very interesting.

[Brian]

I don't know if it's true, but so the indigenous.

[Chris]

So the indigenous who were slaves.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Would ask their masters.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

For whatever food was left over.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Can you put it here? Can you put it here? And they would roll it up, steam it, eat it.

[Brian]

I don't know if that's true, but it makes some sense, at least for kids. So it's good.

[Chris]

I hate to hear about the slaves, but you know, the Iakas is generally the only food.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

That Astrid has ever introduced me to or anybody Venezuelan has introduced me to that I don't care for. I just generally don't like the Iakas. But everything else.

[Brian]

I remember your face the first time we were like cooking a yaka. Yes. You were like, I'm running out of this place. I need to go to Starbucks and McDonald's both together.

[Chris]

Give me some cre. And some cereal and a cheeseburger, please.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

I can deal. The reason why I, I ran out of the room, the reason why I turned my nose and discussed was not because I didn't. I saw that everyone was doing this with love and with care. It's that I had had them before. Maybe you guys make them better. Maybe I should try them all over again. Maybe it's my mom. It's like a yearly.

[Brian]

But I understand that you were afraid because we were all like in a yellow oil with bags and gloves and it was like, what are you guys doing here?

[Chris]

I understand that we went to drop something off to go send it to Venezuela. And at the time you, you know, and still to this day, you can't just Send something directly to Venezuela from the United States. It's got to go on a boat or it's got to go through another country because of all of the trade restrictions around Venezuela. So when you want to send something, you box it up and you go to a guy that lives in a shack, and that dude in the shack boxes everything up with other stuff that's going to Venezuela. Then he rents out space on a boat, he puts it on a boat, he gets there seven weeks later. So we went one time to this place, and I'm telling you, Gustavo, the guy gave us a box of frozen. This was like February one gave us a box of frozen Iakas. There must have been 600 Iakas as a gift. He just gave it to Astrid and it had. It was a box full of Iaka.

[Brian]

Those were left over.

[Chris]

Those were leftovers. And they weren't very good at all.

[Brian]

I can imagine no one like that.

[Chris]

All right, let's continue this conversation. We'll take a break. We'll be back.

[Unknown Speaker]

Have you got a hankering down deep in your soul to tell us what's up? Well, I am encouraging you to do just that. Text us at 212-4333, TCB and tell us what's going on. Give us the hat apps. Tell us the dirty secrets of your life. That's all we've ever wanted to hear. You can also leave us a voicemail at the same number. That's 212-433-3822. And also follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and on TikTok @TCB podcast. And if you want to see any video episodes, you can go to YouTube.com the commercial break and they are all right there. And if your hankering is not to tell us what's up, but it's for us. New sticker. I'm sure there's probably one on the website. Go to tcb podcast.com, click contact us and find I want my free sticker. I know you can do it, and I can't wait to hear your thoughts on anything and everything. Love you.

[Brian]

Bye.

[Chris]

All right, and we're back here with my brother in law Gustavo joining us in the studio. Chrissy has stepped out for a few minutes to allow Gustavo to take the throne.

[Brian]

Thank you.

[Chris]

Congratulations. You don't get Chrissy out of that throne very easy.

[Brian]

This is an honor. Yeah, thank you, Chris.

[Chris]

Actually, lots of people have said we.

[Brian]

Wanted you to be out of fear, but I don't give that suit to anyone.

[Chris]

You know, the funny thing is Is that Chrissy came in today and she was. And we were trying to figure out how we get all three of us in this camera angle. I just couldn't work it out. We didn't have an extra microphone and stuff, an extra good microphone, stuff like that. And Chrissy said, well, I'll go, or you can step out and I'll talk to Gustavo. And I was like, you're going to let my brother love you.

[Brian]

We all want you to get out of the studio for, like, an hour. Especially my sister.

[Chris]

That's my. I think Astrid really does want me to be on the studio for an hour. We're talking about things that are important to know if you're going to be in a relationship with Venezuela. Now, you know, Astrid, Ally, and Gustavo are taken. So none of us are on the block. But just in case, we've been talking through some of the things we just got done with cuisine. Tequenos are my favorite Venezuelan import to this house.

[Brian]

For real. More than cachapas, because you're. You're a cachapa lover.

[Chris]

There was a time during the pandemic when I ate cachopas every night, probably for. Probably for three or four months, every single night. A cachapa is a corn cake that is fried, and then you put butter and you put cheese on it. So it's like cornmeal, butter, cheese. You can put lots of different stuff on it, but that's how we prepare them here. The classic one, the butter and the corn. I want to tell the Americans what this is like. This is like going and getting a really good corn on the cob and then smearing it with salted butter. And it's so delicious and juicy and wonderful. And then you put on top of that, the white cheese.

[Brian]

Yeah, like a fresh cheese.

[Chris]

Yeah, like a fresca cheese. Like something that's native.

[Brian]

Sometimes they put some pork in Venezuela also.

[Chris]

Oh, they put pork on.

[Brian]

The classic one is just with cheese. But the ones with pork are really good.

[Chris]

What is your favorite Venezuelan food?

[Brian]

I'll say. Pavilion, for sure.

[Chris]

Pavillon. What's a pavillon?

[Brian]

Yeah, it's like shred meat with tajadas. Planting, you know, the tahadas.

[Chris]

Okay. Okay.

[Brian]

Beans, rice and I'm missing something. No, this is.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Brian]

Those four.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's all together. It's mixed together.

[Brian]

You can mix it, but it's like they serve it separate.

[Chris]

Okay. So it's like a. It's a dish.

[Brian]

It's a dish. Yeah.

[Chris]

And it's really good. So let me ask you this. The shredded meat that's, like, marinated in something.

[Brian]

Yeah, they have, like, this seasoning, this Venezuelan seasoning. That is really good.

[Chris]

Have I had that? Yeah, that's like the shredded pizza. Okay, okay. You know, the other thing that I don't care for is plantains. I know a lot of people love plantains, but, man, that's.

[Brian]

That's really mean of you.

[Chris]

I know. I think if Astrid had to claim.

[Brian]

You have to work soon, well start eating just plantain.

[Chris]

It's a. It's a little sport.

[Brian]

Yourself. No, that's. That's, like, one of the favorite foods for Venezuelans.

[Chris]

I one time told.

[Brian]

We always eat plantain, like, in, like, barbecues, like, every time we're eating plantain for real.

[Chris]

But, yeah, I think plantains is. This is a staple, but to me, it's a sweet food, so it doesn't go in the, like, the hearty category, if that makes sense.

[Brian]

You prefer having a chocolate with the plantains. It's more a dessert for you.

[Chris]

I prefer having ice cream with plantains rather than meat with plantains.

[Brian]

With ice cream.

[Chris]

I see aspirations. Steak and plantains. And I'm like, that's like putting chocolate on a hamburger. I don't get it. But some people like that combination while they're sitting there. I prefer to split my meals up. And that is a very American thing to do. You have your Salties and then you have your sweets, or you do it the other way around. Whatever it is, you don't mix those two together. Very rarely happens. And I think as close as that comes for me is a cachapa, because it's a little sweet. It's got butter that's salty. Yeah. And then you've got the cheese that adds a little bit of flavor to it. I one time made them. You have. You had roti. Do you know what roti is?

[Brian]

No.

[Chris]

Roti, the soup. The spicy soup that's made.

[Brian]

I'm not much into spicy flavors, but I think I haven't tried that.

[Chris]

I think that's the one thing that surprises me about you and your father, and I guess Venezuelans in general, including Raphael, is you have such an aversion to spicy foods.

[Brian]

I don't know what my dad likes. A little bit of hot sauces and stuff, but for me, it's not like I prefer sweet flavors.

[Chris]

Yeah. You know, no Venezuelan man that I have known really well has liked spicy food.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Is this one of those things?

[Brian]

It's more a Mexican thing, not Venezuela.

[Chris]

It really is a Mexican thing. And if there's one thing your dad loves, it's Mexican food. That's right. There's one thing that Daniel loves, it's that Mexican food.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

What did he. What did he tell me? One time he said he was working in Mexico. Yeah.

[Brian]

Because he used to work in Mexico and he.

[Chris]

What's the story he told?

[Brian]

Yeah, well, he. He used to travel, like, six months to Mexico and he was, like, eating tacos all day. So he was like. He became a real fan of Mexican food and spicy stuff. Yeah.

[Chris]

Oh, he did?

[Brian]

Yeah. Yeah, he did.

[Chris]

Your. Your sister has always told me that he's not a fan of. Of tacos.

[Brian]

He likes tacos.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Brian]

Yeah. Like, he. He's always talking about the tacos al pastor, which is like the.

[Chris]

Yeah, that's the. The lamb tacos. Very good. The street tacos.

[Brian]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah. I think Astrid has been secretly saying that because she doesn't want me to go have tacos.

[Gustavo]

I'm.

[Chris]

I'm talking to Astrid about that. I think Astrid is using Daniel as an excuse.

[Brian]

Venezuelan girls are strategies, too. So you can eat her food. She doesn't know how to prepare a taco.

[Chris]

So that's. Not only are they beautiful, but they tend to be pretty intelligent too.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

For sure.

[Brian]

They do.

[Chris]

They do. That's right. All right, moving on. Social life. Venezuelans enjoy socializing and often gather with family and friends. I find this to be true, and here's why I think this is so important to the Venezuelan people, especially now. Why it's so important. Like Astrid, I'm sure Ale feels this way. I'm sure you feel this way is the Venezuelans are a displaced people. They're a displaced people, and they have been a displaced people. The indigenous have lived there, but the Spanish came over. They were a displaced people. And now many Venezuelans, most of them. It's kind of in a brain drain. Is the displaced people also. It is so important to keep that connection through socialization of family members or not family members, because that is the connection to home. Home is a thought right now for a lot of Venezuelans. It's not a place.

[Brian]

And because Venezuelans, we were, like, kind of forced to move all around the globe.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

So it's not been easy. Like, we have a brother in Spain. We have family in Florida. We're in Texas, you're here in Atlanta.

[Chris]

So it's all around. It's a real challenge in Mexico.

[Brian]

Yeah. All around the world. So. Yeah. And I think you also know that because every time we Come visit you, your wife stay with us, like, till three, three in the morning. And we are just, like, speaking through the same stories.

[Chris]

I get it. I. I have a real longing for that in my own family because that is not how we operate our family. I've said this on the show. I've told Astrid this. I probably have told my therapist this a million times in my culture. And by culture, I mean the family that I grew up in and the people and the extended family members we have. Gatherings are not a thing. You linger. It's not a place where you linger. It's a place where you get together for a minute and then you go. Right. And then you're out. You don't linger. No one spends the night. You know how many times I spent the night at my grandma's house on my mom's side? Twice.

[Brian]

Really?

[Chris]

Maybe. Maybe twice. We would literally go to a hotel before we would spend.

[Brian]

That's weird.

[Chris]

It's very strange now. Now that I've been embedded in this culture for so long, I see just how strange that really was.

[Brian]

Since I don't. Since a young age. I love to spend time, like, with my cousins.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

I love to stay, like, do you know, you know, my. My godmother.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

So I always love, like, to stay at her place. Like, I was like. Like, please, mom and Dad, I want to stay here. I want to spend the night here to spend time with my cousins. Like, playing games, talking, making yolks.

[Chris]

I think it's the biggest. I think it's one of the biggest blessings you can give a child.

[Brian]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

It's one of the biggest blessings you can impart on someone like me who doesn't have. It is the longing for connection with family in that way. Now, it still takes some getting used to. And it doesn't mean that you're always. You're ever, like a hun. Like, as someone, as an outsider, I might always be just a little bit outside the actual. Like, the actual culture in that way. But I long for. And I love that Astrid gets to stay up till three in the morning hanging out with her family. I think it's beautiful. I really do.

[Brian]

I always loved your face, like, trying to understand us. And he was not Even understanding at 10% of what we were saying, because.

[Chris]

We were like, here's the. Yeah. First of all, can you guys stop fucking talking over each other just for one second? I mean, honestly, you walk into a room of Venezuelan and everybody is having six different conversations at the same time. How do you even operate in that manner. How do you do it?

[Brian]

A lot of times we make fun of you and you don't even know.

[Chris]

Oh, I get it. I hear my name all the time. But when three of you are saying it at the same time, I can't understand.

[Brian]

And we know the way to make you like you're playing a game with me. We love to see your face.

[Chris]

I think it's very difficult to understand Venezuelans if you're trying to learn Spanish whenever. And I've said this many times, you're all talking over each other.

[Brian]

That's incredible.

[Chris]

Possible. It's hard. You. I need one person saying it relatively slowly to me, and then I can.

[Brian]

I always tell this story to Ali. One of my favorite moments from your face is when my mom approaches to you and starts speaking to you in English or Spanish or that combination. I love your face, like, making me sound like, come here and help me. I don't understand anything. And you're just doing like, yes, Mom. Yeah.

[Chris]

Yes, Mom, Yeah. But can we be fair to me is that your, your, your mom's English needs a little work. Just like my Spanish.

[Brian]

She has her own dictionary.

[Chris]

But I think your mom's Spanish. No, it's a little bit of work. She's not that good at that Spanish sometimes either.

[Brian]

It is, it is.

[Chris]

It's really hard to understand. Your mom complained to me a couple, like last year, she complained to me. She goes, you know, in Spanish, you know, you don't talk to me anymore. You don't want to listen to what I have to say. You used to talk to me, and I was like, I think you're remembering.

[Brian]

That in college, I used to try.

[Chris]

But I gave up. I used to try, but I don't understand now. I think me and your mom have this understanding where we try to slow down for each other a little bit more. Because I really do sometimes have a hard time understanding your mother. But, you know, listen again. I think probably one of the greatest gifts that's been imparted to me is the gift of the Venezuelan family. Because without that, I'd just be stuck in my miserable Irish Catholic family. And they're not miserable people. They. We just don't operate on the same level.

[Brian]

Your family is great, but yeah. You know, different traditions.

[Chris]

Yeah. We would never think to sit up till three in the morning playing board games. I think we get way too irritated with each other for that. We just all would be.

[Brian]

You can do that. But watching, like, football games without, like, sharing a lot, it's just like watching the TV and.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

And you go to your space. We are like all touching ourselves like. Yes. With our legs on top of the other. Yeah.

[Chris]

I think too is that you're right about this, is that Americans in, by and large grow up with the television as the center of attention. So when they grow older and they have families of their own, it. The television is the center of attention.

[Brian]

So you're trying to say like Venezuela, we don't have TVs.

[Chris]

I don't know what you guys have down there. I haven't been. And I'm probably not going to get to go now. Probably out.

[Brian]

You would?

[Chris]

No, I'd love to. I can't wait to go.

[Brian]

We like Venezuelan was also like a big part of TV families. Yeah. Because we had a lot of very important TV shows, like funny TV shows. Radio Rochella. Has Satri told you about this one?

[Chris]

Listen, this is so crazy because when I ask. Hold on one second.

[Brian]

ChatGPT told you this?

[Chris]

Chat JPT told me this.

[Brian]

Or AI sorry.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, AI told me this.

[Brian]

Hold on. I told Al I wanted to make you react like, play like, show you some, some Venezuelan TV show.

[Chris]

That'll be the next level Venezuelan. I saw this somewhere. What did you call this?

[Brian]

Radio Rochella.

[Chris]

Okay, tell me about this.

[Brian]

It was like a TV show made of all of funny sketches, like I said. Yeah, that's right. Okay, so Venezuelans were waiting for like, I think it was on Mondays night. So it was like perfectly. Because your week was starting.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

So all families were like waiting for this TV show to. To. To start.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

And we, we love like also like for Venezuelans, like the TV was the center of attraction for some time, but we also like after that we were just like spending the night making jokes like those jokes and, and having fun of the, of this TV show.

[Chris]

Do you think part of the reason why Venezuelans turn inward or turned inward to. To family is because the outside world was kind of a scary place.

[Brian]

So I don't think so because at least what I remember when I was a kid, it wasn't that scary. Of course, it's not like here. You have. Have a lot of thieves. And sure, it's not a place like you can be with your iPhone in the streets, but I think it's just something like Venezuela's like Venezuelans like to share. Like I always remember our weekends were like spending time with the family. Like, okay, where's the meeting on there? Yeah. Like Tia. Yeah, are we going to TIA's or they're coming here. So it was like that we are just like family members.

[Chris]

God damn all you. You're so beautiful. What the.

[Brian]

We are.

[Chris]

What the. You're gonna make me want to restore faith in humanity just when I'm losing all faith. Just when I think I've got it pinned down, now I have.

[Brian]

You were born in the. In the wrong place.

[Chris]

I probably was born in the wrong place. And listen, I think that's the thing, too, is sometimes people just feel like they're born in the wrong place.

[Brian]

You'll have an opportunity, a chance to. To visit Venezuela.

[Chris]

Not very soon, or I won't. When's the next election? Isn't there. Somebody was writing on one of those comments that, like, figure this out in the next couple of days.

[Brian]

So today is. Yeah, the 8th. So on the 10th, maybe something's going to happen in Venezuela, hopefully. We're hoping for. For a change in Venezuela.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Brian]

Because we had elections this last year and we heard. You heard.

[Chris]

You know, this time the. The person who supposedly won was recognized by a lot of democratic countries.

[Brian]

Yeah. Right now we're like, like, waiting to see what.

[Chris]

Is this one of those WhatsApp buzzy, buzzy. Things are gonna happen. Things might go down kind of. Anyway, you know what? Let's not talk about it here on the show.

[Brian]

I hope everything goes really, too.

[Chris]

I am rooting for Venezuela. Viva Venezuela Libre. I hope upon hope. Actually, one of the things that I, like, silently meditate about is that my children get to understand who they are in a more meaningful way by visiting the place where their mother.

[Brian]

I want to take them there live.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

Waiting.

[Chris]

I can't wait. We came this close to pulling the trigger this year. We came this close to pulling the trigger, and then we just backed off.

[Brian]

I cannot remember I was saying, like, yeah, guys, come, come.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

From one day to, you know, it's like, okay, cancel the plans.

[Chris]

Your dad said to me when I first met, when we were down in Aruba, I. I said, oh, I'd love to go to Venezuela because I know Americans do go down there, and there's a whole category of travel agents that will get you down there and take, you know, make sure that you're safe, I guess, as much as they can or whatever. And your dad said, I won't bring you to my house if I don't think I can keep you safe getting you there. He's like, once you get there, fine. He's like, but outside my house, if I don't think I can keep you sick, I won't invite you. Yeah, anything can Happen. But I guess it can be the said the same can be said about a lot of places in this world, including the United States of America. So who knows? Anyway, way listen, Gustavo Boquete, you are a dear friend. I love you as a brother. You've been a long time friends sometimes too.

[Brian]

I do love you a little.

[Chris]

And as my Venezuelan brethren, you're welcome here anytime.

[Brian]

Thank you. Yeah, this is an awesome moment for me because you were like, like your kids when they start asking for a cookie.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Brian]

So yeah, last year you started like, do you want to come to the show?

[Chris]

Yes. Like, no, I just.

[Brian]

No, he keeps going. He keep going. I did your same strategy at the end. I give you the cook.

[Chris]

I'm smarter than I look and I know that no one's gonna do anything they don't want to do.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

So you just have to keep pecking the head a little bit. Just keep tapping somebody on the shoulder until they turn around.

[Brian]

That's right.

[Chris]

All right, let's take fun. We did have fun. Good job, buddy.

[Brian]

Best to you. Best to you in the podcast universe.

[Chris]

We'll be back. Well, that is well worth the wait. You won't hear it until everybody else does, but man, was that good.

[Gustavo]

Gustavo, I love hearing his opinion.

[Chris]

He is a gentleman and a scholar. Not necessarily in that order, but I could have gone on forever with Gustava, but he is my brother in law, so there is a level of comfort and I'm so proud of him. He came in and he did it.

[Gustavo]

He faced his fears.

[Chris]

He faced his fears. He did it well. He's hearing himself for the very first time on a microphone, which is really strange to do.

[Gustavo]

It is.

[Chris]

And he did it well. And we only had to pan out 10x to get him to get his entire body into the. Into the frame. It's a large boy. Anyway, you can check this special out on YouTube out available today. As you're listening to this you YouTube.com the commercial break for all the episodes Chrissy and I. All the interviews, everything. All of the interviews are actually out there. There's a lots of older episodes. And then all of the episodes since the beginning of the year certainly are there and available. So check that out. We certainly would appreciate it. 212-433-3822. That's 212-4333. Questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas. We are taking them all at that phone number. Voicemail also. But just be wary of that voicemail because you know, Chrissy, I'm a gangster and I will Put that up here on the show. If you leave me some snappy little message, you can better believe that's why I think very few people actually call the phone number. Maybe I should stop threatening to put it on air. Maybe more people would call if I stopped threatening to put it on air. Maybe I can bait them into doing it by saying, feel free to call.

[Gustavo]

You'll be anonymous.

[Chris]

I promise I won't put it on air. I'll bait a bunch of people to do that. Also, if you would please add the commercial break on Instagram TCB podcast on TikTok, if that's still around tomorrow. Actually, as we release this episode tomorrow, we'll see whether or not TikTok is still available to operate in the United States. United States. I think it will. I think there'll be an injunction while people work it out. There's people claiming they're gonna buy it. We'll see. And the website, tcbpodcast.com all the information about Chrissy and I, the audio, the video, it's all right there from one location and your TCB swag, hit the contact us button, drop down menu. I want my free sticker. Send us your address and it away it will go. Also if you would please, Roy Wood Jr. York go check out his new special available today on Hulu. Okay, Chrissy, I guess that's all I can do for this special episode of the commercial break. I think so tell you that I love you and I love you best to you and best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say we do say and we must say goodbye. What the am I doing this, Sam?