Making NO Cents!

Summary

The Commercial Break | Episode: Making NO Cents!

Release Date: July 25, 2025
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley

Episode Overview

In this uproarious episode, Bryan and Krissy set their comedic sights on the cult-classic HGTV show Decorating Sense, notorious for its questionable design choices and minuscule renovation budgets. The duo, channeling their signature chemistry and sharp wit, gives a play-by-play roast of an episode, examining what makes it both endearing and utterly unhinged. The show weaves in tales from their own lives, snark-laden commentary on pop culture, and an open invitation for listeners to join the fun.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Jane’s Addiction & Perry Farrell Tangent

• Background: Bryan goes on an early riff about the band Jane's Addiction, its frontman Perry Farrell ("Peripheral"), and the history of Lollapalooza.
• Insight: The band’s creative dysfunction is compared to dysfunctional home decorating—setting the stage for the main segment.
• Quote:

  “They are a concept art band. Think of them as a Pink Floyd updated to the 80s and 90s… but he is a looney tune. Let’s make no doubt.” — Bryan (03:00)

• Highlight: Bryan recounts a chaotic Jane’s concert in the ‘90s (wallet chain confiscation and all), drawing parallels with the chaos about to unfold on "Decorating Sense”.

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2. Introduction to “Decorating Sense” (09:00)

• Premise: An old HGTV show where designers must redecorate on a laughable $200–$500 budget.
• Hosts’ Reaction: Pure disbelief.
• Quote:

  “These are things you would not do to any house if you wanted to redecorate it. But this is what they do… Paper mache and grass and old dog bones…” — Bryan (10:00)

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3. Episode Watch-Along & Color Commentary

a. The Homeowner & The “Bohemian” Makeover (13:42)

• Homeowner: Laura Murphy, a theater-loving publicist, dreams of a space reflecting her “slightly offbeat personality” in her tiny 1928 bungalow.
• Host Banter: Bryan & Krissy are quick to lampoon the size and style:

  “It’s Laura Ashley meets Laura Ingram meets Dr. Laura… it’s terrible.” — Bryan (13:25)

b. The Design Plan & Bizarre Color Choices (16:00–20:00)

• Designer’s Approach: A mood board featuring bold reds, oranges, browns.
• Host Reaction:

  “Brown, blood red, and… Commercial Break orange. I know.” — Bryan (18:02) “That looks like a… Burger King.” (about the freshly painted walls) — Bryan (19:41)

c. Found Objects, Trash Furniture, & “Doo Doo Brown” (20:00–26:00)

• Upcycled Decor: Bookcase room dividers, glass beads stuck with tape, discarded chairs from the street.
• Host Zingers:

  “Bring out the… bring out the diarrhea. Let’s put it on the chair.” — Bryan (25:50) “If this happened to me, I would pay someone to take it out of my house.” — Bryan (28:16)

d. The Infamous Accessory Parade (29:30–35:30)

• Mannequin heads with glued-on Red Hots candy, cubes protruding from the wall, a “TV cozy” (to literally hide the TV), and an arsenal of inexplicable trinkets fill the home.
• Memorable Exchanges:

  “Here come those boxes. 14 cubes on a wall.” — Chrissy (32:45) “It’s so cool. Isn’t it terrific? It’s a little brown.” — Chrissy and Designer (27:23).
  “Look at all those dicks. That is one weird room.” — Bryan, noticing the… less-than-subtle wall art (36:10)

e. The Big Reveal & Host’s Final Judgment (37:37–41:00)

• Homeowner Reaction: Overwhelmed but plays along for the camera.

  “I think I love it for the camera. It’s terrible.” — Bryan (39:17)

• Overall Impression:

  “We tapped the hidden potential in this bland bungalow with unexpected color, loads of texture, and a touch of theatrical flair.” — Chrissy, imitating the show (39:29)

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4. Second Makeover – “No Money Makeover” Segment (41:46)

• Setting: Lori Haley Fox’s New York City apartment.
• Solution: Rearranging furniture, reflecting on sentimental value, moving a candelabra, avoiding brown paint entirely (to Bryan’s immense relief).
• Host’s Take: More functional and tasteful than the first, but still lacks design sense.

  “At least the paint rollers are not there… I’m no decorating expert… but these are really poorly decorated places.” — Bryan (43:36; 45:41)

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5. Pop Culture Sidebars & Listener Engagement

• Chip & Joanna Gaines: Discussion of their evangelical ties, defense of inclusive casting on Magnolia Network.

  “Good for you, Chip.” — Bryan (12:17)

• Rolling Calls & Stickers Promo: In true TCB style, the audience is heavily encouraged to engage via calls, texts, social channels, and to watch for a limited-edition merch drop.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Bryan on Redesigns:

  “If you could just do that to my house and leave the rest outside for someone else to take.” (37:58)

• On Trash-to-Treasure Philosophy:

  “Sometimes decorating is about breaking into your friends’ garages and taking everything that’s not nailed down and deciding later what it can be.” — Designer/Decorator (28:27)

• Chrissy’s Crisp Verdict:

  “I did not call that bohemian.” (29:39)

• Life Advice:

  “Go full shit-colored walls.” — Bryan (24:52)

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Noteworthy Segments & Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment | |--------------|------------------------------------------------------| | 03:00 | Jane’s Addiction, Lollapalooza background | | 09:00 | Introduction to “Decorating Sense” | | 13:42 | Meet Laura, the Homeowner | | 16:00–20:00 | The “Design Board” and color choices | | 20:00–26:00 | Upcycling “treasures” from trash | | 29:30–35:30 | Mannequin heads, cubes, TV cozy, and “art wall” | | 39:03–41:20 | Reveal reaction, party, “hidden potential” spin | | 41:46–47:08 | No-money NYC apartment makeover | | 47:46–48:23 | Roast & Redux: Internet response, meme status |

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Recap & Tone

Bryan and Krissy move fluidly from heartfelt nostalgia to razor-sharp lampooning, maintaining their offbeat, conversational flow. Their commentary is self-aware, affectionate in its own way, and always skirting the edge of gleeful absurdity. The episode is a fun, cathartic takedown of “Decorating Sense” style — the perfect comedy comfort food for anyone who’s ever watched a bad home makeover show and thought, “What were they thinking?”

Takeaways:

• Don’t put “doo doo brown” on the walls—ever.
• Sometimes “making no sense” is the most fun you can have, as long as you know when to laugh at it.
• The best interior design tip from TCB? “If you don’t like it, just change it back after the TV crew leaves.”

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For more, check out The Commercial Break on YouTube, Instagram, or wherever you listen to podcasts. And don’t forget to call in and grab that limited edition sticker… preferably before you redecorate your living room!

Transcript

[Conspiracy Theorist]

People have no idea where cell phones came from. So cell phones are extraterrestrial technology. Have you seen the pictures of the original Nokia phone? They're symbols instead of letters. It's ancient, thousands and thousands of years ago, but it was found. You got to look this up. There's actual pictures. It's so cool. Unless they've censored it. IPhones originally used to be called knees. Used to be a device where certain beings could communicate with the gods, which were extraterrestrial. People have no idea where cell phones.

[Brian Green]

On this episode of the commercial break.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Welcome back to Decorating Sense, where we are in the middle of a Cy Winship makeover. It's kind of a bohemian living room. And that mirror looks great.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I did not call that bohemian.

[Brian Green]

There is nothing bohemian about that. I mean, I've known a lot of bohemian people and they have much better taste. Eclectic, but much better.

[Designer/Decorator]

Oh, good.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I did not think we could top the mirror, but we have.

[Brian Green]

This is.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Come on, take a guess.

[Designer/Decorator]

It's either an ottoman, a weird pillow, or a TV.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, see, that's right.

[Brian Green]

A TV cover.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh.

[Brian Green]

Oh, you covered your TV back then. This wasn't that long ago. It's 2007. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Oh, yeah. Cows and kittens. Welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co host of this, Chris and Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Chrissy. Brian, best to you out there in the podcast universe. Yeah, Chrissy and I just. Well, quickly talking about Perry Farrell or Peripheral, if you think about it, because I met Perry Farrell one time down a little five points and he said his name was Peripheral. So there you go. As in Peripheral Vision. The story of Jane's Addiction is a wild one.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

It really is.

[Brian Green]

Yes. And if you ever have a chance to. If you ever have like 38 minutes of your life to waste and you're high probably on heroin, you can go and listen to Letters to Xiola, which is a prelude to Three Days, the song Three Days. They are a concept art band is rock band is really what they are. Think of them as like a Pink Floyd updated to the 80s and 90s. They started in the 80s. They became popular in the 90s with Ben caught Stealing and that video that goes along with Ben Caught Stealing and they become wild. They became catchy. Soon it's catchy tune the Mountain Song. Ben Caught Stealing Three Days. It is formative as far as I'm concerned in my interpretation of music and what it can Be. It tells a story. Three Days is an epic song. It's like 12 minutes long, and it goes. It's like a symphony goes through different, you know, overtures, and it's beautiful. And his voice is haunting in a lot of his songs, but he is a looney tune. Let's make no doubt about it. He. He has. I mean, as all tortured creative types are, including myself, so I know this well. Perry has had some issues over the years. He has had. There's. He's no stranger to drugs. I believe he's been sober for some time. I don't think you make it to 78 years old.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Runs Lollapalooza.

[Brian Green]

He put Lollapalooza together. It was originally his idea to get a bunch of bands together. Jane's Addiction, part of the first and the second and maybe even the third, Lollapalooza. Then he brought it back from the dead after it kind of fell apart. Now he's got two versions of it, one in Brazil and one in Chicago that they do every year. And it's loved. It's beloved. The Lollapalooza brand is still very much alive. But Jane's Addiction has been on again, off again for many, many years. That's nothing new for them. They are like the Pink Floyd. They are Pink Floyd. They are a concept art rock band, and they get together and they break up every 15 minutes, and you just never know what's going on with them. Like nine months ago, ten months ago, they were out playing a show in Chicago, I believe, I think, and. Or maybe it was New York. I can't remember. They had an onstage altercation. Yeah. Perry. Pharrell started to punch Dave Navarro. Dave Navarro. Now, they've been at each other's throats since the band began. Dave thought he was the head of the band. Perry thought he was the head of the band. They went blah, blah, blah. But this was like a wild interaction. And it's online. It's. It's. There's video of it you can go watch. If you haven't already seen it, you can go watch it. Well, now the members of the band are suing Perry for $10 million, saying that he took money out of their pockets by derailing the entire tour.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah, because they had just had. They just kind of started.

[Brian Green]

They just started again. I think they even had a new. Some new music that was coming out. All kinds of stuff. Listen, Perry is not at the top of his game. 69 years old. He's not at the top of his musical game. None of them are. I mean, let's just age. That's age in general. I'm also not at the top of my podcasting game, and I'm going to get worse from here. So let's just.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Let's just call it expectations.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Set expectations correctly. That's right. I remember. I want to say it's 1996 or 7. They had been broken up for a couple of years. They got back together. They were coming to Atlanta, to the ballroom here in Atlanta. And the ballroom was like, literally an old bowling alley that had been cleared out. And they would. The Electric Ballroom. They would put people in this space that was huge, cavernous, and then they. There was, like, no seats. No.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah. There was an Electric Ballroom in Knoxville, too, and it was like an old warehouse.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Electric Ballroom Atlanta. Oh, is it still around? Oh, no, no, it can't be around. New. New. New. New. New. New. New. No. 1500 seat capacity. Anyway, so Jane's Addiction came here, and we went. We managed to score tickets, $30 tickets, and we went to this Jane's Addiction show. And I'll never forget the show. Why won't I forget this show? I will never forget this show because 1997. November 15, 1997. I'll never forget this show because I had a chain around my wallet, and my chain was taken from me. They would not let me go in. I had to take the chain off my wallet, and that's when I broke free from the chain. Break free from the chain.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

You never put it back?

[Brian Green]

No, I put it back on occasion. I would wear it on special occasions. Weddings, funerals, stuff like that. Bar mitzvahs. But that was a wild show. There were strippers dancing in corners of the ballroom. The band was hot. They were on fire. Perry never had the best live voice. It was always kind of all over the place. But I remember being. It was. The show was wild. I loved it. I could imagine just 1500 of us watching them play the hits. But it's sad because I think that had they stayed together and had Perry been kind of more together upstairs that he would have, they would have put out more great music, especially during those years when they were really hot back in the 90s, and maybe even the early 2000 porno for pyros was good. We make great pets, stuff like that.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

So anyway, you know, here's to hoping that the guys can find a way to reconcile and.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Seems not now. It's like not.

[Brian Green]

But let's be honest about it, at his age, you know, are they going to go out another. Like. I mean, that's not the kind of music. I don't know. Then I say that, but then rolling. Then Keith Richards is still doing it, you know, I don't know. Maybe. Maybe they get back to. Maybe he can get back on the high horse. And by high horse, I mean heroin horse. Maybe he gets back on that heroin horse and we can all get some good music out of him again. But do yourself a favor. You want to know about how wild and wonderful and wacky Peripheral gets, go listen to Letters to Ziola, which I listened to one night when a silky, sultry woman took me to her lair and put that on, and we got high as fuck. It was a wild night. A wild night. And we listened to it, like, four different times because you got to listen to it. To start, it's his letters to this lady who. His girlfriend who passed away. And how she. I don't. I don't know. They put their body together. You go figure it out.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

Okay. So do that. All right. Now, speaking of dead things, I'm going to jump on a bandwagon here that's been beaten to death, but I like it, so I'm going to jump on it.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Speaking of dead things.

[Brian Green]

Speaking of dead things. Speaking of dead things, I'm going to jump on a horse that's been dead for a while. It's been beaten to death, and why not? You heard it here last on the commercial break. For a number of weeks, maybe months, people have been circulating an old HGTV show called Decorating Sense.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

C E N. Yeah, I think I remember that show.

[Brian Green]

Okay, I do not. Until people started. I. I don't. I do not. I did not know about it in the first place, but when people started circulating video of it, I thought it was crazy that this is one of these early home renovation shows where you would invite somebody into your house, and the premise of the show is they have, like, $200 to renovate an entire room of yours. Now, you can imagine, even back in the 90s, I think, when this was filmed early 2000s, how much $200 can get you. And the things that they come up with are odd at best. At best, odd, if not totally insane. These are things you would not do to any house if you wanted to redecorate it. But this is what they do. And this was an actual show. And it went around for a while, and now everyone's remembering that time that this show was on and how crazy it was that they were decorating houses with you Know, paper mache and grass and.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah, they had to get creative.

[Brian Green]

Old dog bones and get. Okay, so let's watch an episode together. We're starting a little early in the episode because I want to see if we can get through the entire episode. It's about 27 minutes long. You want to do it?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Let's do it.

[Brian Green]

Let's do it. And by the way, there are so many people that are out there doing this. I mean, a lot of.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Really?

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

This is new to me.

[Brian Green]

Well, there you go. Well, you're not on social media, so not very much. Not enough. Chrissy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Next on Decorating Scents. The homeowner of this small space gets a lesson in living large.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

I lovingly call at the Chateau because it just is so tiny.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We're going Bohemian modern for under $500 in our. No.

[Brian Green]

God, were we that bad at decorating back then?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Thank God for Chip and Joanna Gaines, which. Let me say this about Chip and Joanna Gaines. I just want to say this for a minute. And I didn't know this, and now I know this, and I'm really happy to say this, that Chip and Joanna Gaines, I guess, have not been shy about discussing their evangelical Christian beliefs. I did not know that. I had no idea. Like everybody else in the world, I've seen enough Chip and Joanna to last me a lifetime. I haven't watched their show in five, six, seven years. But now they have the new channel.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

They do, Magnolia. I like that channel, actually.

[Brian Green]

And I hear that some parts of Austin are dedicated to Magnolia. All of Magnolia. It's like. It's like they decorated the entire town. They made it famous, essentially. I think they were really on the forefront of Austin, Texas, becoming a hot.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Is it Austin? Are they in Austin? I don't think they're.

[Brian Green]

I think so.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I don't think it's Austin.

[Brian Green]

I think it's right outside of Austin.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

I. I know they have.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I know it's Texas, but.

[Brian Green]

Okay, so the. They have a new show. They cast a gay couple with a son in that show. And then a bunch of famous evangelical preachers knocked Chip and Joanna for this. Chip and Joanna are not in the show. They just own the channel, which the show is on. They're executive producers. And Chip went right at him and was like, oh, it must be nice that people who don't even know the Lord are getting their first taste of judgment from those who are preaching it. Right. Yeah.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Good for.

[Brian Green]

He was. He went right at it. And I was reading the. The tweet or the social media Response responses that he was giving to this. And I thought to myself, good for you, Chip. Yeah, good for you. There you go, buddy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Makeover. What to do when one room serves three purposes and in trash to treasure. We'll turn you on to some great ideas. Old light fixtures.

[Brian Green]

It is a lot of music, isn't it?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Tambourines thrown in there.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Hi, everybody, I'm Joan Stephan. Welcome to decorating scents. 30 year old Laura Murphy is artistic in every way but decorating. A former actress, now theater publicist, she would love to have her home reflect her outgoing, slightly offbeat personality. And by the end of today, she will have a living area worthy of applause. Despite its small size, Laura's 1928 house holds a big place in her heart.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

It's my little cottage in the city. My little one bedroom bungalow. And it's my haven.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay, settle back, grab your popcorn. We are going on it.

[Brian Green]

That is decorated in a style that. It's hard to explain. It's Laura Ashley meets Laura Ingram meets Dr. Laura.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Tour.

[Brian Green]

It's terrible.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

A little tour, A little tour.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

Here's the living room.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Lovely.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

And then behind us is the master bedroom.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Those chairs are like right up to each other. I know. If you're sitting there in those chairs.

[Brian Green]

Your knees are knocking together. Yeah. This really is a very tiny house. No, knock on the tiny house. Love the tiny house. Think of all of it. But look at the air conditioning controller on that house.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

You actually have to physically turn that with a twist tie or something.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

And just right over here is the kitchen.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Ooh, spacious.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

And the dining room.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Laura says bigger is better when it comes to gardening. But housekeeping, I like it being so.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

Small because I don't have to clean as much, truth be told.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What about decorating?

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

I've moved the furniture so many times. There isn't another way that I can move the furniture to.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, how, how do you move furniture around a 50 square foot? Yeah, I mean, if you, if you're not, you're not watching this on YouTube, then you should know that this is a very small place. But there's no decorating sense to it whatsoever, in my opinion. And this is coming from a guy, I mean, who has posters on his walls, you know what I'm saying? I'm no decorating sense either.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

Make it feel spacious, you know, I don't know. I don't know if that's really the thing.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I know, I know. Style wise, Laura likes to mix it up. She's partial to reds and golds. Is your theatrical side coming out at all in your house.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

You know, I've got the opera posters. I have actually work in the theater district. I feel like it's so, you know, theater and music is so much a part of who I am that, yeah, I definitely want that to be reflected in my home.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Laura spends a fair amount of time working from her home. Her secret desire, secret space to entertain.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

Well, I've been here for about three years.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, that's not good.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I have to give up on that dream.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, well, you don't have to give up on that dream.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Maybe there's a big backyard or an.

[Brian Green]

Additional 5,000 square feet you can put on the front of the house.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

And I've never had any sort of a gathering. I didn't have a housewarming party. And so I hardly ever have more than two or three people over at a time, because. Where would you put them?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We'll leave that up to our designer Siwash. A big imagination, very small car. What do you have? What do you have?

[Designer/Decorator]

A design board.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What do you have?

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God. Look at that. A design board with twill, sheepskin rickets.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

And a poster board with some ideas.

[Brian Green]

Chip and Joanna. This is not.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I have no idea what I'm looking at. But it's bold and it's bright red.

[Designer/Decorator]

Orange. She's theatrical.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Why is her house beige? She's afraid of color, apparently.

[Brian Green]

But she, who trusts the guy who shows up in a brown T shirt with paisley pants to decorate their house, not be afraid. After this, we're not afraid of color.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What do we have in there?

[Designer/Decorator]

Well, let's open the boot and see.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We're gonna need help.

[Brian Green]

We need help.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

This little thing holds a lot. Speed it up there, John. Wait a minute. Didn't we see these before?

[Brian Green]

There's more.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

How many do you have?

[Designer/Decorator]

35.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

35 chairs.

[Designer/Decorator]

I don't care if it's a small room. It's gonna be a lot of seating.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Finito.

[Brian Green]

Finito. So far, I think he's just taking trash out of the trunk. Chrissy.

[Rachel (Producer/Caller)]

Right.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Kids and trash bags.

[Brian Green]

What in the world? Is there anything worth putting in your house that's coming out of that car?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We're about to find out.

[Brian Green]

What's that?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

We're about to find out.

[Brian Green]

Oh, here we go.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Act one, scene one. Taping. Really taping.

[Designer/Decorator]

Lots and lots of taping.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Stripes everywhere.

[Designer/Decorator]

Oh, yeah. This is gonna be a process.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We use a level to pencil on our lines. What makes most sense. Staying true to the baseboard or staying true to the level. Of course. Nothing is as easy as it seems, especially with 80 year old walls. As long as the stripes are the same width all the way around, they're gonna be so dominant. Yeah. I sound like I know what I'm talking about.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

All right. He's putting some painters tape on.

[Brian Green]

Putting some painter's tape. Looks like they're going for stripes in the house.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Perfect.

[Designer/Decorator]

They'll never know I'm here and.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Perfect.

[Brian Green]

I. I don't. I don't want stripes anywhere in my house.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Red.

[Designer/Decorator]

I'm brown.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah, you gotta be careful with that.

[Brian Green]

Look at those colors.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

The colors.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God. Brown.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Red and orange.

[Brian Green]

Brown. Blood red and. Commercial break. Orange. I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I've always.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Halloween vibe.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

This red's called heartthrob.

[Designer/Decorator]

You are a red hat.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh, no.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

But nothing like this. I think I'm actually closer to orange than I am the red. Cy says the key to making bright colors pop is to pair them with neutrals.

[Designer/Decorator]

I'm freaking out.

[Brian Green]

No.

[Designer/Decorator]

So I'm freaking out.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Don't freak.

[Brian Green]

That's not even good painting. What are they doing?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I don't know what they're doing.

[Brian Green]

This is what you get for $500, goat.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Now if I can only convince him of that.

[Designer/Decorator]

Why do I do this?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What are you worried about?

[Brian Green]

I act as if I know what I'm talking about when it comes to. To style. But I do know that you should probably not paint the trim of your house and the walls of your house the exact same color. Unless that color is white. You know what I'm saying?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

The brown is an awful brown color. It really is Doo. Brown.

[Brian Green]

It is dooo.

[Designer/Decorator]

What am I worried about?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

He's gone for a whole wall.

[Brian Green]

He's done a whole wall. Here's my wall.

[Designer/Decorator]

Fast food restaurant comes to a small, sweet little cottage.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Beautiful. It's going to be beautiful. It's.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

It's.

[Designer/Decorator]

Thank you.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's gonna be dramatic. It's gonna be daring.

[Brian Green]

We just want your burgers.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Exactly.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

That is the first rule of decorating is a new coat of paint. But I don't think they chose the right combo.

[Brian Green]

I would pick one color and stick with it. You gotta understand, if you're listening to this, they literally put lines randomly on the wall and decided to paint four different colors. It looks like the Venezuelan flag. What is going there?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And 80 bucks later. This room is gorgeous.

[Brian Green]

No, no, no, no, no, no. That looks like a. I take my kids to some play places at like a Burger King, and that's what Burger.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

King callers Is curtain call already?

[Brian Green]

Yep.

[Designer/Decorator]

Red wool drapes.

[Brian Green]

I mean, we're doing. We want drama. Yeah, this is drama.

[Designer/Decorator]

She's in the theater.

[Brian Green]

Let's add yet another color to this multicolored wall. Another color?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

That heavy wool.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, you know, so it's fabulous material. Just four bucks a yard at a fabric outlet. This wool provides the same softening effect as velvet for a lot less. A non traditional tie back finishes the. Look. Look.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God. This looks like someone threw up on the wall. This poor lady. I wonder how quickly some of these people change this after these folks leave. Yeah, I mean, listen, if someone came in and said, I'm gonna do this for free, I'm gonna spend $500, I'm gonna change this room. And I knew that as soon as they left, I was okay to change it to something else. You know, hey, why not? If I can just change it back to the way it was, why not? All right, let's take a break. We'll be back with more HGTV decorating scents. Jumping on a bandwagon here, kids. So far, so good. You make this rather snappy, won't you? I have some really heavy thinking to do before 10 o'.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Clock.

[Rachel (Producer/Caller)]

Hi, cats and kittens. Rachel here. Do you ever get the urge to speak endlessly into the void like Brian? Well, I've got just the place for you to do that. 212-4333. TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Feel free to call and yell all you want. Tell Brian I need a raise. Compliment Chrissy's innate ability to put up with all his shenanigans or tell us a little story. The juicier the better. By the way, we love to hear your voice because Lord knows we're done listening to ourselves. Also, give us a follow on your favorite socials. Hecommercial break on Insta, TCB, podcast on TikTok. And for those of you who like to watch. Oh, that came out wrong. We put all the episodes out on video, YouTube.com thecommercialbreak and tcbpodcast.com for all the info on the show. Your free sticker or just to see how pretty we look. Okay, I gotta go now. I've got a date with my dog. No, seriously, Axel needs food. Today is pork chop day.

[Brian Green]

Okay, back watching decorating. Since we're here with some girl who lives in a small place and she's hired or let these people into her house to destroy it. Here we go. They're currently hanging blood Red curtains in a multicolored wall that's painted like a Burger King.

[Designer/Decorator]

And when it's not a tie back, you open your curtains, like, to that far. It's a trim piece.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh, that's gorge.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

High drama for low payout.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Now, there's a reason all this cheap.

[Brian Green]

There's a reason. There's a reason why this is so inexpensive is because no one wants it. It's terrible.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Time to turn Laura's bookcases into room dividers. We remove the particle board backing room dividers.

[Brian Green]

What?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I mean, I don't know how much room you have to divide.

[Brian Green]

Get a Chinese screen. You know what I'm saying? This is silly.

[Designer/Decorator]

That is what these go in here. I'm going to put two of them on. They're old freebie legs. Yeah, we'll mount them there.

[Brian Green]

Love it. Cool.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

One done, one to go.

[Brian Green]

I think these guys are, like, the worst decorators in town. And they also got paid $200 to do this.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Meanwhile, I get to work adding detail with peel and stick leading strips and glass beads. It's wiggly and I'm not supposed to stretch it. Oh, no. Now it's stuck.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

What is that?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Tape will hold the beads in place until the glue dries.

[Brian Green]

They are literally adding fake trim to the inside of windows with glass beads.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

With a glass bead in the middle.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. No, the people on the Internet are right. This is one of the worst decorating shows I've ever seen.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Is that straight? Look, Tell me it's straight. It is.

[Brian Green]

Okay, good.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Not bad for four bucks. And our recycled bookcases are looking pretty good, too.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God, Chrissy, that's really bad. I've never seen anything like that in my life.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

They've matched the doo doo brown to the bookcase.

[Brian Green]

Yes. When I got a divorce from Julia, she mercifully came over heart in hand and decided to help me decorate. But by decorate, she put, like, you know, a lamp on a table, you know, told me where to put the furniture, you know, stuff like that. But it was definitely, definitely decorated by a man. I mean, it was definitely lived in by a man. You could tell there was nothing on the walls. I had a picture of my family in the corner. One table lamp and furniture. Yeah, you remember? Okay, there you go. I stepped it up a little bit when I moved to the next place, but that's because I moved in there with a woman. Also, I have never even come close to being this bad at decorating. You have to try to be this bad at decorating.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We add not one, but two rugs cut from a single remnant.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I mean, it would look way better without that doo doo brown. I don't know why they've made that a theme and the whole thing.

[Brian Green]

I think just take out the multicolor altogether. If you're gonna go doo doo brown, just make it all doo doo brown. You know what I'm saying? Go full shit colored walls.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Bucks for the pair.

[Brian Green]

Okay.

[Designer/Decorator]

So I'm driving along the street in a very nice neighborhood.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Designer/Decorator]

And there these are all piled up on the boulevard.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Most people would keep driving, but not Psy who slip covered the whole thing using a vintage casing.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Neighborhood for throwing out trash.

[Brian Green]

He's going to the rich neighborhoods to look for trash. Well, hey, listen, can't argue with I. I got nothing against that. I wouldn't pick furniture like things I would sit on personally. But I've seen some stuff on the side of the road that had I not been afraid of getting hurt by somebody, I would have picked up. You know what I'm saying? Happens all the time. And listen, no argument there, but this is not what you pick up from.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

The side of the room too, that he's picked out. Two cream chairs that are very low to the ground. And then bring out the brown.

[Brian Green]

Bring out the. Bring out the shit. Bring out the diarrhea. Let's put it on the chair.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Fabric is beautiful.

[Designer/Decorator]

It's called an old poodle poodle frise because It's a loopy 1950s chocolate brown. Could it be any better?

[Brian Green]

It's chocolate.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah, it's hot chocolate.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's a lot of work, but for.

[Designer/Decorator]

20 bucks, it pays to drive around with a pickup. She has friends over and everyone can.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Lie down, watch the tv.

[Brian Green]

That's terrible.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

A set of nesting tables freshened up with a coat of paint stands in.

[Brian Green]

Let's throw in a McDonald's yellow into the mix. Now that we've got all the colors of the shit rainbow, let's throw in after McDonald's diarrhea.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

There's a coffee table. But if you want a really unique table, you use whatever the heck this is.

[Designer/Decorator]

What do you think they are?

[Brian Green]

Any idea?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You know what? I've been looking at it and. Oh, you want it? Thanks, Jeff. I think wallpaper printers.

[Designer/Decorator]

Wow, you're good.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You're very close. Wallpaper embosser side didn't change a thing. Not even the color of these embossers. Jeff simply cut a base and top from plywood and now we're assembling them using screws.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God. It's.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

That's so bad.

[Brian Green]

It looks like you bought that at a circus. Yeah, that looks like something they would make for a Disney World ride when they were trying to get it to look like a different time period. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And if you thought that was unique, you gotta tell everybody about this little piece of chocolate insanity because it looks like candy is stuck to this.

[Brian Green]

It's so cool.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Isn't it terrific?

[Designer/Decorator]

It's a little brown.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, more doo doo brown. And now it's got small dildos on the front of it.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We're giving Laura a place to stash her electronics using a couple of cast offs I picked up for next to nothing.

[Designer/Decorator]

The DVD player will go in here, her speakers can go in there.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And those wacky bumps, clay spacers from an old kiln. That is what I was talking about.

[Brian Green]

Spacers from an old kiln. Who's looking at an old kiln? My father in law is printing more stuff, in case you're wondering.

[Designer/Decorator]

Isn't that amazing what you'll find in a friend's garage.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Ooh, ooh, ooh.

[Designer/Decorator]

Where's these? Give me, give me, give me.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We're using more of them to create a funky frame for a mirror. And we're gluing them on.

[Designer/Decorator]

We're gonna glue them on.

[Brian Green]

And then another frame, more dog turd.

[Designer/Decorator]

Brown from a friend's basement. He said, you want this old convex mirror.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Like, who doesn't want an old convex mirror?

[Designer/Decorator]

Had Jeff cut this.

[Brian Green]

And that's what we'll do. I would pay somebody to take this out of my house. If this happened to me, I would pay somebody to take this out of my house.

[Designer/Decorator]

Oh, yeah, it's this whole thing of like found objects, you know, what's. It's free. Can I make it into something? I love that. Sometimes decorating is about breaking into your friends garages and taking everything that's not nailed down and deciding later what it can be.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Well, we are $241 closer to giving our homeowner's living room a modern bohemian look. When we return, hopefully we'll be done with this mirror. And then we will move into the dining room. And then we're going to bring back Laura.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh, boy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Coming up next, how to get an art gallery look for less.

[Brian Green]

How to put more brown in your brown.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

He's all.

[Brian Green]

This is terrible.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Plus, a surprise housewarming for Laura. And in our no money makeover, what to do when one room serves three purposes.

[Brian Green]

Okay, well, I look forward to that. I Look forward to that gem.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

This really was bad.

[Brian Green]

This is really bad. Oh, is this a. This might be a commercial spacer, because. Oh, there we go.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Welcome back to decorating. Since where we are in the middle of a Cy Winship makeover. It's kind of a bohemian living room. And that mirror looks great.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I did not call that bohemian.

[Brian Green]

There is nothing bohemian about that. I mean, I've known a lot of bohemian people, and they have much better taste. Eclectic, but much better. Oh, good.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I did not think we could top the mirror, but we have.

[Brian Green]

This is.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Come on, take a guess.

[Designer/Decorator]

It's either an ottoman, a weird pillow, or a TV.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah, see, that's right.

[Brian Green]

A TV cover.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh.

[Brian Green]

Oh, you covered your TV back then. This wasn't that long ago.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's 2007 TV cozy. Psy covered a box made from foam core with a layer of felt.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I thought that looked like foam.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He's using reinforced strips of the same felt and glue to create sort of a woven effect.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

That is weird.

[Brian Green]

A nice.

[Designer/Decorator]

Probably downtime, you know, after you've had some major surgery, you've got a couple months to yourself.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Well, we continue on here.

[Brian Green]

I think this is the guy at art school. I have a couple kids at 70, and a few of them are really tactful about their art. And then a few of them just take all the colors of the rainbow, textures, colors, and they mix them together, and that's. They're much like their father in that way. Just throw everything at the wall and see what sticks. I feel like this designer is that guy.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Jeff has another project, rematting Laura's black and white photos with orange mattes back in the living room. The photos look awesome.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Word to the fashion savvy, if you have yourself a tv, you should make yourself a TV cozy.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

A TV cozy?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Do you wonder if the host is in on this? Like, how bad this really is? Or is she just as oblivious as the designer?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I think she's getting paid to be the host.

[Brian Green]

I think you're right about that.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

That's awesome.

[Brian Green]

It's awesome. Look at that.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You look so happy in your earrings. Okay, they're not real earrings, but they are real crystals discarded from a broken chandelier.

[Designer/Decorator]

So I got these paper shades, painted them with extra wall color with more brown.

[Brian Green]

With more.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I mean, he's all over that brown.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my God.

[Designer/Decorator]

I punched some holes with a needle.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And a light kit.

[Designer/Decorator]

These are like lead crystal things that someone said, ah, hate this thing. And I said, well, you know, goodness, I'LL take it and make something out of it one day. And guess what? One day came.

[Brian Green]

I bet this guy. I bet he's a hoarder. I bet at his house there's just, like, so much shit.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I still don't know why you need the TV cozy.

[Brian Green]

I don't know why either. It's pretty common that people have TVs in their family rooms, living rooms. Yeah. You don't need to hide it.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Moving on to the dining room, Jeff begins prepping display boxes outside while Cy and I do a little rearranging inside.

[Designer/Decorator]

And this amusement.

[Brian Green]

More brown. Brown on brown on brown. Polaria is huge.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

There's so much brown in that whole area.

[Brian Green]

She said she wanted theater colors. Is brown a theater color?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Not that I know of.

[Brian Green]

Not that I know of. But then again, I prefer this thing from a theater kid.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Here come those boxes. Okay, and that is just the beginning. We are putting how many of these cubes on the wall?

[Brian Green]

14.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

14 of them.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

14.

[Brian Green]

14 cubes on a wall.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Brown.

[Brian Green]

Brown. When you have 100 square feet and the cubes are one foot by one foot by one foot, sticking one and a half feet out the wall. Yes.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Take away space.

[Brian Green]

Yes. You're taking away all the space.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's the cube. Here is the plan. It involves math. I'm out of here. Here's a conversation piece for you. It is a styrofoam wig head, some.

[Brian Green]

Cinnamon candy, polyurethane spray, cinnamon candy.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

A wig head. A Styrofoam wig head. A Styrofoam wig head with Red Hots all over it. Glued all over it.

[Brian Green]

You couldn't trust me around that. I'd start eating them, that wig head.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Would be gone, and now it is artwork. But why stop at one wig form when two is twice as nice? Make it three. You've got a collection.

[Brian Green]

Oh, those things are waking up in the middle of the night and chewing on your neck. I'm sure of it. That's. That's fucked up.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Anything will do. From apples to oranges.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, let's put real fruit on our living room shit boxes. That's awful.

[Designer/Decorator]

For the ultimate in discount art. Clean out your.

[Brian Green]

That is a dildo.

[Designer/Decorator]

That is a dick basement. Paint everything the same color white and put it on the boxes.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Clean out your. What?

[Brian Green]

Clean out your. Your basement. The dildos from your basement. Paint them white and stick them half erect on your dick. On your shit boxes.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Granted, it's not everyone who has a friend giving away free chandeliers, but size?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

It sounds like he got all this.

[Brian Green]

Stuff from other places or his basement.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Or his basement friends.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Now, this is a dining room set. You cannot help but notice this. What's the story? Thrift store table.

[Designer/Decorator]

Free set of school chairs. And the same color as the wallpaper. Heartthrob in a lack.

[Brian Green]

Free set of school chairs.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Heartthrob.

[Brian Green]

Heartthrob. I have to kneel to have breakfast. The red.

[Designer/Decorator]

And we've got a beautiful set.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Added a little embellishment over there.

[Designer/Decorator]

Little craft balls for detail.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah. Yeah, it's cool. More white accents. Top off the table. And finally, accessories all around.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

More mannequin heads.

[Brian Green]

Oh, man.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

He'S got fur. And that's not all. Check out these gorgeous pillows Sy made.

[Brian Green]

Look at that one. Look at that.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, they are awesome. A few more touches and we are done.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh, throw in a pink lamp.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah. Throw in a bright pink lamp. On the doo doo Brown with the McDonald's orange and the Wendy's yellow.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

My gosh.

[Designer/Decorator]

Oh, my. We are done.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I know. What were we?

[Brian Green]

I had those exact same shoes he's wearing, by the way. I just want to throw that in there, okay. So that him and I share the same design sensibilities here. I'll back up just a little bit. Those shoes.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I like them very much. They're very comfortable.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Designer/Decorator]

We are done.

[Rachel (Producer/Caller)]

I know.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

What were we trying to do?

[Designer/Decorator]

Bohemian modern.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I think that's what it was.

[Designer/Decorator]

Oh, I think it's there. I can't believe this room. I love the art wall.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I know.

[Designer/Decorator]

With the apples.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

That was the best. I love it with the white. I think the white wall.

[Brian Green]

Oh, the best. Look at all those dicks. That is one weird room. They have really made this trippy. Bohemian. Not Ansel Adams.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Not.

[Brian Green]

Not. What's the guy's name? The guy who does all the trippy artwork. Salvador Dali. Salvador Dali, for sure. That's where it went. All right, let's take a break. We'll be back with more decorating. And this turned out to be the show everybody's talking about. Yep. It's just as bad as they say it is.

[Rachel (Producer/Caller)]

Why don't you text us? And we can text back and then you can text us and reply then so on. It's a fun little game I've been playing, and I think you'll be great at it. 212-4333. TCB. That's 212-433-3822. You could leave a message, too. If you do, maybe you'll end up being the voice of the Show. But be warned, the pan is not great. You could go to the website and drop us an email. Also tcbpodcast.com and while you're there, you can get a free sticker. Who doesn't want a free sticker? Just go to the contact us button and ask for one. Follow us on Insta at the commercial break and watch the [e-mail] the commercial break. Now I'm gonna go back to that texting game you want to play. Come on by.

[Brian Green]

Back to it. Decorating scents. Here we go. Final home stretch. Let's see what they had. Let's see the big reveal.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh, yeah.

[Brian Green]

Let's see how the owner cries after she finds out that her terribly decorated house went to. Holy shit. Bad decorated house.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

It's cool. Your pillows are insanely good.

[Designer/Decorator]

They are really dear.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

And the pillows aren't bad out of the whole thing.

[Brian Green]

That's right. If you took just the pillows and put them on a decent couch, I would say that I would be happy with that. If you could just do that to my house and leave the rest outside for someone else to take.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Brown couch.

[Brian Green]

Brown couch down.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I'm sorry if we did nothing else.

[Designer/Decorator]

But make her comfortable in front of the tv.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We've done our job. How much did you spend?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

You have to lift up the cozy.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. That's so weird.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I can't get over the cozy.

[Brian Green]

The weirdly shaped, oddly decorated cozy for your tv. Cause who wants to see a TV when you're watching tv?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Thank you for free stuff is what we have to say. Thank you for free stuff. I don't want to get up off her couch, but I know we have.

[Brian Green]

To go get her. I know.

[Designer/Decorator]

Yeah, we have to go get her.

[Brian Green]

And bring her in.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

Oh, my gosh. Did she just open her eyes in the middle of her own room? That was a weird edit, wasn't it?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Usually they, like, walk you in the door or something. All of a sudden they just show her opening her eyes in her room.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Oh, my gosh.

[Brian Green]

You weren't kidding. I. Oh, my gosh. You weren't kidding. Someone took a holy shit in my room. Sorry. It's so different.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

It is so different.

[Brian Green]

I think I love it for the camera. It's terrible.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Who says you can't always get what you want? We tapped the hidden potential in this bland.

[Brian Green]

Well, we do have to remember how bad it was before.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

This is true bungalow with unexpected color, loads of texture, and a touch of theatrical flair.

[Brian Green]

This just doesn't even look like the same place.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

I'm totally floored.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Before, Laura's oversized chair and loveseat were too big for this small space.

[Brian Green]

Now a sectional puts now, now boxes on the wall take up the rest of the space.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

And make everything brown.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Now a sectional takes up more space than the other chairs did.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You know, while colorful pillows and funky.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Accents provide in the camera guide can move around.

[Brian Green]

I know. While dark walls make it look smaller than it was before.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Escape from the ordinary.

[Brian Green]

Look at the chandelier. Look at the chandelier with the plastic Christmas lights on top of it. Plastic Christmas lights. And you think I'm joking. I'm not. Look at that.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I know.

[Brian Green]

That's what. That's what people in the 80s put in their windows as votives during Christmas time.

[Designer/Decorator]

It's your art wall.

[Brian Green]

I'm almost trying not to have to cry. I love it because I am gonna have to do so much work to change this. Thank you so much. I'm almost trying not to cry.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

There's weird heads everywhere.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

How do you feel in a room like this?

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

I feel super hip and cool.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Well, we do have one more surprise for you. Oh, no.

[Brian Green]

We left you with the bill. We charged it all to your credit card.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay, everybod, the housewarming party Laura always dreamed of.

[Brian Green]

You're fabulous.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Dare I say another great makeover for under $500. But I do hope you stay tuned while we have a little housewarming party because coming up next, an interior redesign. Cut the cake.

[Brian Green]

Let's go. Cut the cake. Get me the fuck out of here.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah. Just ahead, our redesign tackles a New York apartment with one room for working, eating, and. And, oh, yeah, living and later in the show.

[Brian Green]

What's that?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

So it's called a studio.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it's called a studio apartment. They're pretty common in New York, I think. All right, let's fast forward to this part.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Oh, God. Yeah, this was bad.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

No cost decoration.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Washington Heights, on the northern tip of Manhattan is where actress well now you.

[Brian Green]

Get to pay $7 million to live in Washington Heights.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

I think Lori Haley Fox lives.

[Lori Haley Fox]

I just love my neighborhood. I up here, it's a real family oriented place. And even though I'm still in Manhattan, it's just nice.

[Brian Green]

Wow, those teeth.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Are a.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

They're big and they're white.

[Brian Green]

They're like George Washington teeth. Weren't his made out of wood or something like that? I mean, no offense. Maybe she had an accident or whatever, but it's. That's a veneer job.

[Lori Haley Fox]

Still a neighborhood.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

She has a small one Bedroom apartment.

[Lori Haley Fox]

My living room area pretty much is everything. It's my dining room. It's my office space. It's my living room.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And she's been busy decorating since she moved in two years ago.

[Lori Haley Fox]

I painted everything. I like color. I have this sort of angled so that I could separate the area from the eating area and the office space. I love Eastern philosophies and things. I have a lot of Buddhas and things in here, which I enjoy my end.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, most people actually get Buddhas, not, like, actual pictures of Buddhas in tin frames, but. Okay.

[Lori Haley Fox]

Tables and my coffee table are actually kind of important to me. They were my mom and dad's first pieces of furniture when they got married.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

She likes her stuff, but she's not sure it's in the right place.

[Lori Haley Fox]

What I don't like is that it's.

[Brian Green]

A little bit boxy.

[Lori Haley Fox]

I just think there's a better way of doing it.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And the dining area doesn't get much dining.

[Lori Haley Fox]

I only use it if somebody's here and I'm having dinner.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

A redesigner can help.

[Interior Designer]

So I know she has three purposes for this room, but in this case, separating the room with the couch. The dining room is totally ignored. The conversation space too spread out, and the walkway way too tight.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We get busy. Everything out but the TV and the.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Thank God you don't have that other guy coming back. Paint everything brown.

[Brian Green]

At least the paint rollers are not there. Yeah.

[Interior Designer]

So I want to try a new.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Position, which is our first.

[Brian Green]

Oh, well, that's what she said.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Challenge. What's your thought?

[Lori Haley Fox]

Yeah, I guess it's okay.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Now for the two chairs, I want.

[Interior Designer]

To try actually bringing the TV down the wall and maybe do the chairs on either side.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Okay.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

How do you feel about that?

[Interior Designer]

It's totally different.

[Lori Haley Fox]

It's definitely more intimate.

[Interior Designer]

My big thing was reversing that sofa, getting it on this side of the room and opening up this space. Now I can integrate the dining room into the seating group.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

You want to do it?

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

I like it.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Integrate it.

[Brian Green]

Go. Integrate.

[Interior Designer]

You had the rug in here, but all the furniture was all around.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Lori Haley Fox]

None of it was on it.

[Interior Designer]

So now it really kind of feels.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Like, okay, we can all see on the rug together. We get our tables in place.

[Interior Designer]

Can you get out?

[Brian Green]

Now?

[Chrissy Hoadley]

All special pieces from Lori's parents.

[Interior Designer]

Now they kind of take center stage.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Which is great. Good. We're lifting the sides of the dining table to give it more presence.

[Interior Designer]

I'm thinking we put the dining room on the rug.

[Brian Green]

That'd be great.

[Interior Designer]

And then I want to get a longer chain and swag your candelabra out and get it out from the wall.

[Rachel (Producer/Caller)]

That'd be great.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I'm not sure this has changed anything about this room, but. Okay.

[Lori Haley Fox]

My living area and my dining area. One big area.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Now.

[Brian Green]

I saw nothing like a creepy Buddha sitting behind you on a. On. On a couch in your bedroom.

[Homeowner Laura Murphy]

Yes.

[Interior Designer]

Some bigger pieces of art.

[Brian Green]

Yeah.

[Interior Designer]

And I'm hoping that we can use them in the.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Great. Yeah, let's go. Okay, good.

[Interior Designer]

When we started, the art was so small and hung way too high. There was a lot of negative space, and it didn't even really relate to the seating groove. Now we're hanging some larger pieces.

[Brian Green]

I mean, here's my question. Like, even, like, I know this is 20 years ago or so. 19 years ago. 18 years ago. Don't you have, like, an Ikea you can run to and grab a little bit of, you know.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

More modern furniture. Yeah. Target. Where there's some throw pillows or a $30 chair or something like that. Yeah. And again, I am no decorating expert by any stretch of the imagination. Thank God for Astrid, but. And I know our house has no decorating specialty either. It's beautiful, but every once in a blue moon, you go to the store and you pick up a couple knickknacks, and you change things around a little bit. These are really poorly decorated places. In the first place, some height and.

[Interior Designer]

Drama to the room, and it feels so much more sophisticated.

[Lori Haley Fox]

Yeah, that looks awesome.

[Interior Designer]

With the accessories, we're really bringing in Laura Lori's personality. Before, all the things she loved were just scattered on the floor, and now we're giving them a place of prominence.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

And the dining area is also getting the attention it deserves.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah. A little lower.

[Interior Designer]

You can see it in the mirror.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah.

[Lori Haley Fox]

Which is nice.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Hey, you hit your head.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. No. And that's not even a real chandelier. It doesn't have any lights in it.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

No.

[Interior Designer]

This table all the time.

[Brian Green]

Great.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

This might be camp.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

We started.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I guess.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

With the candles for sectioning off the.

[Brian Green]

Nothing like setting the entire apartment building on fire.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Conversation space. And it wasn't working. Now take a look.

[Interior Designer]

The room still has three purposes. A dining room, an office, and a conversational space. But now we've integrated all of it, and nothing feels closed off or ignored. Now anywhere you sit, you can enjoy the whole room.

[Lori Haley Fox]

It's just great, because now all the areas complement each other. Nothing's cut off anymore. It's just one great big Festive space.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah, I want to jump right in, take a nap in there. That's. I need my booty. All right, well, you know, hey, listen, Chrissy, to each their own. This is definitely the train wreck show that everybody has been talking about. There's no doubt about it. And so there you go.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

When we saw for ourselves.

[Brian Green]

Ava, Pete Davis is having a baby. So we're all happy. That's all. That's all that really matters.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Cheers to Pete.

[Brian Green]

Not even sure we talked about that on this episode, but it's all starting to bleed together at this point. Little bit. Oh, all right. Well, there you go. Decorating Sense. Find it on YouTube because that's where it is.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

It's as bad as you think it is.

[Brian Green]

Oh, yeah, there's no doubt. Whenever. And there's episodes where people on Instagram specifically have taken bits and pieces.

[Chrissy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

Put it together, commented on it. Real designers, people that have a good design idea for design and they are super funny. So if you want to get. Get a real laugh out of Decorating Sense, get the condensed milk version out there on Instagram. Everybody's doing it. It's the hot trend right now to make fun of decorating sense. For decorating sense. But it is pretty bad. I mean, I can't even believe they let this run. But this is long before HGTV was a thing, right?

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Yeah, it was in its infancy.

[Brian Green]

$500 was all they had cuz no one was advertising on hgtv. I wonder where this woman is now. The lady who hosted.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

I was thinking the same thing.

[Brian Green]

She's somewhere. Not on hgtv, but somewhere. Yeah, she's probably on Canadian TV doing something. Anyway. All right, Merch drop coming soon. Pay attention. Follow us on social media at the commercial break on Instagram, TCB podcast on TikTok or pay attention to the [e-mail] that merch drop will happen. It will be a limited run for a limited time, so please get in on it. You will also get your limited edition sticker with every single order. Happy and proud to send it to you every time you buy a piece of merch. Also, TCB minus, that's our next big stunt, the TCB stunt coming your way. We'll be reviewing Kenny Copeland and his directed in, produced in, acted in, in movie. One of them, he's got three or four of them. We'll be picking one of them and we'll do that, so stay tuned. We'll stream that live on at least two platforms, YouTube and Twitch. Also 2, 124333 tcb 212-433-3822 questions, comments, concerns, content, ideas, we take them all on that phone number, jump in, get a part of the action. We'd love to hear from you. We always respond YouTube.com/the commercial break for this episode right now. Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do for today.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Thanks.

[Brian Green]

I'll tell you that I love you. Best to you and best to you out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say we do say we must say bye.

[Co-host (possibly Chris Hoadley)]

Goodbye.

[Rachel (Producer/Caller)]

I gotta get some cocaine.