The Celtic Curse Of Carol K!

Summary

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The Commercial Break

Episode: The Celtic Curse Of Carol K!
Release Date: October 17, 2025
Hosts: Bryan Green & Krissy Hoadley

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Episode Overview

This "Commercial Break" episode launches headlong into Halloween season, blending Bryan and Krissy’s trademark irreverence with a satirical deep-dive into the "satanic panic" of the past. At its core, the pair dissect and riff on the sensational claims of Carol Kornacki, a 1980s/90s-era ex-witch/evangelical speaker who warned America about the supposed occult dangers lurking in Halloween traditions. Between playful jabs at the absurdities of moral panics and commentary on pop culture (from Britney Spears’ drama to bathroom selfies), the hosts create a rambunctious, loose episode that’s part roast, part Halloween history, and all classic TCB chaos.

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Key Topics & Segment Timestamps

1. Halloween Hysteria and "The Portal to Hell"

[01:21, 16:09, 18:30, 24:12]

• The hosts open with comical observations on over-the-top neighborhood Halloween decorations, noting how societal norms flip in October—severed heads on mailboxes go from “sinister” to “festive.”
• Bryan introduces the episode’s main target: Carol Kornacki, “a very famous former witch” from the late 80s/90s, who fueled American fears about Halloween as a real “portal to hell.”
• They riff on Kornacki’s media appearances warning that “on this one day a year, the portal to hell opens up” ([01:56]), imagining battalions of demonic “Laura Ashley” suburbanites emerging from potholes.

Quote:
"If you went to Laura Ashley in the 80s, that was a portal to hell." – Bryan ([02:35])

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2. Pop Culture Catchup: Britney, Bathroom Selfies & Parenting

[05:09 – 15:45]

• Bryan and Krissy discuss recent Britney Spears headlines, focusing on dubious claims in Kevin Federline’s new tell-all book, including allegations of cocaine use while breastfeeding.
• They pivot to the phenomena of public-bathroom selfies, mock-complaining about their mutual acquaintance’s obsession with sharing glamorous shots from unglamorous restrooms.
• Laughter ensues as they rate public bathrooms (Disney World, Ritz Carlton), segueing into how people judge restaurants based on restroom cleanliness.

Quote:
"Whenever I see those bathroom selfies, I smell the I-75 restroom south of Valdosta. That's what I smell." – Bryan ([13:31])

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3. Halloween Traditions, Then & Now

[16:09 – 18:30]

• The hosts reminisce about their childhood Halloween experiences, how the holiday’s popularity evolved, and the modern trend of “trunk-or-treat” events—mocked as “cars and candy, come closer to my trunk!”
• Bryan admits he “never really got into Halloween,” contrasting with Krissy’s enthusiasm and their efforts to ensure their kids can enjoy responsible Halloween fun.

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4. Carol Kornacki: The Celtic Curse

[24:12 – 55:02]

Bryan plays clips of Carol Kornacki’s infamous anti-Halloween testimony, pausing often with Krissy for satirical commentary, fact-checking, and hilariously off-topic banter.

4.1. Dark Legends, Druids, and Human Sacrifice

[24:42–29:36]

• Carol alleges Halloween’s roots are purely sinister—Druid priests conducting blood rituals, human sacrifices burned alive in wicker baskets, and Stonehenge as a “place of human sacrifice.”

• The hosts mock her grim earnestness:

  Quote:
  "It's hard to take that voice seriously. Dabbled in darkness and death. From testimony from a former witch..." – Bryan ([24:54])

  Quote:
  "That’s a big wicker basket. Put a whole human in there." – Bryan ([26:28])

• Krissy questions the logistics and historical reality of these wild stories, while Bryan jokes about substituting virgins with zucchini to appease the ghouls.

4.2. Trick or Treat, Pagan Fears & Fact-Checks

[28:12–31:55]

• Kornacki claims Halloween is “an age-old pagan festival of death,” warning that “every time your child chants ‘trick or treat’… they're partaking in a pagan festival.”

• Bryan facetiously suggests kids yell "dick or meat" instead for safety ([28:36]).

• The hosts consult TCB's in-house chat bot to fact-check “Sam Hayen”—revealed correctly by ChatGPT as Samhain, a festival but not a god. They note Carol’s penchant for “making up facts or misinterpreting them to fit her needs.”

  Quote:
  "It's a day. It's not a god of the dead. And... a lot of the things that she's saying here are just pure conjecture. She's making it up whole cloth." – Bryan ([31:58])

4.3. Escalation: Demonic Demands, Animal Sacrifice, and Virgins

[29:45–35:14]

• As Carol’s claims escalate (spirits demand not just snacks, but animal and then virgin sacrifices), Bryan and Krissy lampoon the idea that historical trick-or-treating involved life-or-death negotiations.

• The overblown tales spark jokes about hurrying to lose one's virginity “so Samhain won’t take you,” and how “being a parent just means always searching for a new virgin.”

  Quote:
  "That way ward off the spirits. Yes. When Samhain comes, doesn't end up taking you." – Bryan ([34:18])

4.4. Modern Superstitions, Smashmouth Logic & Black Cats

[36:01–39:00]

• Carol pivots to blaming Halloween for everything from animal shelter break-ins (particularly for black cats) to ritual animal “dissection.”
• The hosts, with ChatGPT’s input, confirm that while shelters may exercise caution, the truth is far less lurid than Carol’s “frenzy of murder” implies.

4.5. Bible Verses as Bludgeon, More Occult Dangers

[40:00–42:50]

• Bryan and Krissy mock Carol’s scriptural interpretations, especially her “translation” of Deuteronomy (“regard them not means have nothing to do with them”).
• Krissy relays that prohibiting kids from participating leads to “instantly becoming the weirdest kids at school.”

4.6. Bonfires, Pumpkin Faces, and Baby Sacrifices

[48:01–53:13]

• Kornacki links modern bonfires and jack-o-lanterns directly to ancient pagan baby sacrifices.
• The hosts laugh at her attempts to render even cartoon ghosts and smiling pumpkins suspect, noting “it's the marshmallow Stay Puft guy, not some murderous ghoul.”

4.7. Conclusion: Halloween Panic vs. Reality

[53:13–55:12]

• Bryan and Krissy clarify: While Halloween’s roots are old and complex, claims like Carol’s are anachronistic, exaggerated, and more about sustaining moral panics than respecting historical nuance—or present-day fun.
• They tease that “every subculture (even Christianity) has weird or dark roots if you look hard enough,” reminding listeners that Halloween now is mostly “tight outfits, bars, and candy.”

Quote:
"So does the Bible, Carol. Yeah. They were sacrificing lambs, killing Christians, hunting people down because they didn't believe in this or didn't believe in that." – Bryan ([54:08])

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5. Closing Chatter: TV, Recommendations & Next Week

[54:51–56:32]

• The hosts unwind with recommendations: “Task,” “Love Is Blind,” “Ed Gein” stories, and more.
• They preview next week’s guest (Nacho Redondo), and remind listeners to catch Bryan’s upcoming solo project “After the Break” for well-researched deep-dives.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "On this one day a year, the portal to hell opens up and allows all the demons and witchcraft." – Bryan [01:56]
• "Every time your child chants trick or treat, he is again repeating an age-old pagan festival.” – Carol Kornacki [28:12]
• "Say, ‘dick or meat.’" – Bryan, mocking alternatives for “trick or treat” [28:36]
• "You gotta get laid as soon as possible, kids. That way ward off the spirits." – Bryan [34:18]
• "Whenever I see those bathroom selfies, I smell the I-75 restroom south of Valdosta." – Bryan [13:31]
• "So does the Bible, Carol... They were sacrificing lambs, killing Christians, hunting people down because they didn't believe in this or didn't believe in that." – Bryan [54:08]
• "It's the marshmallow Stay Puft guy, not some murderous ghoul..." – Bryan [52:19]
• "She’s a fucking fun sponge." – Bryan on Carol’s buzzkill energy [47:45]

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Tone & Style

• Banter-heavy, Improvised, Satirical: Bryan and Krissy maintain their signature energy, alternating between sharp cultural commentary and absurdist riffing.
• Self-aware and Irreverent: The show satirizes alarmist religious takes while affirming the value of Halloween as a joyful, creative outlet.
• Mockumentary Vibe: The duo play up Carol Kornacki’s outlandish claims for comedic effect, providing context while poking fun at misplaced hysteria.

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Time-Stamped Roadmap of Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment | |----------------|---------------------------------------------------------| | 01:21–02:35 | Halloween decorations, Carol Kornacki intro | | 05:09–15:45 | Britney drama, bathroom selfies, public restrooms | | 16:09–18:30 | Halloween through the decades, “trunk or treat” | | 24:12–29:36 | Carol Kornacki clip: Druids, sacrifice, wicker baskets | | 28:12–31:55 | Trick or treat as occult ritual, "Sam Hayen" explained | | 29:45–35:14 | Virgin sacrifice myths, escalating demands | | 36:01–39:00 | Animal shelter break-ins, black cats | | 40:00–42:50 | Bible verses, prohibiting Halloween, weird kids | | 48:01–53:13 | Bonfires, pumpkins, “baby sacrifices” | | 53:13–55:12 | Halloween panic vs. reality, context | | 54:51–56:32 | TV show recs, sign-off teasers, next week preview |

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Final Thoughts

This episode is TCB at full volume: part nostalgic Halloween special, part satirical response to religious panic-mongering, loaded with inside jokes and pop culture zingers. The extended riffing on Carol Kornacki’s clip provides a timely (and hilarious) reminder of past hysteria, while Bryan and Krissy’s warmth and improvisation keep the episode engaging—even when tackling “icky and weird” territory.

Listeners are left with the clear message: Have fun, let kids enjoy their Peppa Pig costumes, and if you see a smiling jack-o-lantern, it’s probably not a recruitment tool for Samhain, Sammy Hagar, or Satan.

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Next Week: Guest Nacho Redondo, more improv, and the promise of Bryan’s upcoming solo project “After the Break.”

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Best to you, Bryan and Krissy!

Transcript

[Brian Green]

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[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

So what's it gonna be?

[Brian Green]

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[Rachel]

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[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

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[Rachel]

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[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

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[Rachel]

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[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

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[Rachel]

Well, it's that time of year again where every other house turns their front lawn into an altar of witchcraft and death. We got gravestones, skeletons, bloody corpses, just all this casual neighborhood decor because nothing screams welcome home like a severed head by the mailbox. You know, it's like any other time of the year. You see a pentagram on someone's front door and you know something's a little bit off. But come October, it's the perfect way to spread holiday cheer. And by the way, heaven forbid, if you don't get in on it and don't have a 12T demon on your porch, then you're being extra. You're the crazy one. You're brainwashed.

[Brian Green]

On this episode of the commercial break, Carol Ki is was back in the early 90s, late 80s, early 90s, was a very famous former witch who used to run around telling about the perils and pitfalls of Halloween. And this one day a year when the portal to hell opens up and allows all of the demons and witchcraft.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yes, I'm just picturing it opening up.

[Brian Green]

Just a bunch of Carol Kornackis like Midwestern women kind of like a pothole with their Laura Ashley dresses on, like flying around.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That would be scary.

[Brian Green]

If you went to allure ashley in the 80s that that was a portal to hell. The next episode of the commercial break starts now. Yeah, boy. Oh, yeah. Cats and kittens, welcome back to the commercial break. I'm Brian Green. This is my dear friend and the co host of this show, Kristen Joy Hoadley. Best to you, Kristen.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Best to you, Brian.

[Brian Green]

Best to you out there in the podcast universe. Many people excited that you're back in your chair.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, good.

[Brian Green]

Many people.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I'm excited.

[Brian Green]

Excited, yeah, we're all excited that Chrissy's back in her chair. Many people, yeah, many people wrote in to say that it's good to have Chrissy back. A lot of people also give high praise to Tina.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I give high praise to Tina.

[Brian Green]

She did a great job.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

People enjoyed those episodes and said it's good to know that if Chrissy can't be there, that Tina can jump in. And I agree. It's always good to have a friend that you can call because an episode with just me, probably not going to be very good. Probably not going to be very good.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I don't know.

[Brian Green]

But yeah, but maybe someday you'll hear a show with just me and that show. An additional show. Not have not. No commercial break going away. Brian's not leaving the commercial break. But I am working on a new project and I'd like to announce it here. It's called after the break.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

You heard it here first.

[Brian Green]

You heard it here first. Because no one else gives a shit. Yes, no one else gives a shit. It's not like I'm gonna get a write up in the Hollywood Reporter, but after the break, I will take one issue, topic, person, whatever, and I will focus on it. I will do my homework. There will be actual facts that are researched and cited and we will blend in a little bit of comedy. I think the tagline is going to be if you like your curiosity with a bit of comedy or your. If you like your comedy with a bit of curiosity or your curiosity with a bit more. Smart ass, tune in after the break. So we'll break down one specific topic like psychics or hallucinogenic healing or the kidnappings that are going on. Corey Feldman is one I want to do. Oh, yeah, Flat earthers, the rise of the podcast, bro. All that good stuff. So after the break and we'll tell you more about that. I just wanted to make a small, short announcement. Keep your eye out for that. That will broadcast on publish on Mondays. So then you'll get your Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Phil here of the commercial break, right?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The whole Week.

[Brian Green]

There you go. Look at that. The whole week. What am I doing to myself? Why would I ever do that? Speaking love craziness, have you been keeping up with the Britney Spears drama?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Somewhat. I mean, there's always kind of some drama forming around. The only thing that I just saw was something about Kevin Federline.

[Brian Green]

Federline, There you go.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Things were dicey for a while. Or are they dicey now or what?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, great question. Right? Because there was a lot of headlines that Kevin Federline has made. He's got a new book, a tell all book.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Okay, so it is a new book. I'm sure something that happened back years ago.

[Brian Green]

He is claiming in the book. Yeah, he's claiming a lot of stuff. But one of the things that's kind of the more shocking claims is Kevin is claiming in the book that Brittany was using cocaine while breastfeeding the kids. Which is like when you're breastfeeding a kid. I don't know about any other mothers, but at least Astrid was like super cautious about anything she put in her body. Yeah, even like seafood she didn't want to eat for whatever reason could possibly, I don't know, mercury or whatever. But she was super cautious. Now Esther doesn't do drugs, never done drugs, and she's not a big drinker, so she wasn't drinking. But, you know, doing cocaine while you're breastfeeding.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, that's.

[Brian Green]

That's what Kevin claims, by the way. I'm not saying that's what happened. That's what Kevin claims. And it's not like Kevin Federline is known to be the most trustworthy source of information.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, then there's that.

[Brian Green]

Then there's that. But however, Kevin has raised the two children that they had together, him and Brittany. And by all accounts, those kids are turning out okay. They're not in front of the media all the time. Kevin doesn't parade them around. You know, I guess he's going to now to some degree to get promotion for his book. But it's not like in the last 10 years you've seen Kevin Federline dragging the kids around town, putting them in, you know, set up photo shoots for PR or publicity. Now Kevin's probably got a pretty sweet gig, I would imagine. Britney pays him a lot of money every month.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I'm about to say. Yeah, I'm sure he has lots of help. Yes, had lots of help raising the kids and who knows too, because that dad of hers was very strict with things. So who knows if that was part of the Deal too. Like you can't pray the kids are NDA.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, like an nd. Like you cannot disclose any information. You cannot do anything. But it seems like if that was, it's now either expired or. Kevin doesn't fear that kind of retribution because he's saying a lot now over the last couple of weeks. He had a sit down with ET where he said, I fear for my children. I fear that one day they're going to wake up and the news story is going to be that Britney's no longer here. Because what you see on social media, it's ten times worse.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Okay.

[Brian Green]

And he might know. She looks unhinged. Yeah, she looks not well. She looks like a person who is sitting in her own mental health issues and the only outlet is cutting these dance videos or in a bathroom when she's on a date. You know, I mean, she's like this weird stuff now. She could be trolling all of us. That. That could be a reality. None of us really knows what goes on in someone's head. And so I'm not claiming that Britney needs to be institutionalized or anything, but it seems like maybe there should be someone there or someone should step in, but the only person who could really step in would be her dad or her mom. And there's like so much drama. It's sad. The whole situation is sad because there are children involved and they probably do want to have a relationship with their mother and they probably love her very much and she is not there. She's not available. She's often wherever she is. Hawaii or whatever.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Mexico or something.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, something like that. She built a house down in Mexico, I think so in those dance videos, there's like dog poop in the background. There's junk everywhere.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I catch one of them every now and again. And I'm like, up, there she is again. They're not surprised anymore. But yeah, you know, and. But maybe that is like there's two sides to every story. And then there's the.

[Brian Green]

There's a truth.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

There's the truth.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. There's his side, her side, and the truth.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And we know social media isn't like the truth teller.

[Brian Green]

No, either. Yeah, we're. We're seeing 30 seconds of her day. Right. So we don't really know, but. And part of me does believe that she is trolling people with a lot of those posts, I don't think. I think she's making herself look extra crazy to make fun of the fact that we all thought Britney was crazy for a long time. And then in fact, the conservatorship was dropped. And seemingly vindicating her at some point. But there, there's part of me that might believe that while her dad, certainly, I believe, was after some money, and I think he was trying to control her in a way. You know, he's kind of a controlling father in, in that sense. We all know that. We, we, we know that just from the stories we, we've heard that are true. But I also think maybe there's just a dad there that was trying to put the cat back in the bag, so to speak. Like, wow, she was out there as a young girl. We put her out there, got up and now maybe I can protect her just a little bit, but I'll just. I have to really protect her. I have to be like, overprotective. They put cameras everywhere and body guys and all these people to help keep her in a place where she can be safe from herself and any harm that anybody else may want.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

But maybe this is her, you know, kind of. You know how when you had those friends in high school, they weren't allowed to drink.

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

They weren't allowed to go out, they weren't allowed to do anything. And then they got to college.

[Brian Green]

Fucking wild it out.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, exactly.

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Went nuts. So maybe that's kind of what this is a little bit. I don't know.

[Brian Green]

I don't know either. But I just wanted to, like, I'm free. Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Whatever the fuck I want.

[Brian Green]

Yes. Maybe she now is just like, I got my own house, I got my own things. I can let my dog shit in the background if I want to. It doesn't really fudgeing matter. Yeah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I mean, somebody to clean that up.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. I've got 10 people to clean that up. It must not be. If it's a prison. It's not. It's a. It's a prison of gilded lilies, so to speak. In that sense, I mean, I don't know. Would I trade craziness for money? Like, would I be crazy and have money if I could have money, but someone said, you got to be crazy, would I do that? Probably. Probably.

[Unknown Male Speaker]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

I'd be crazy with money. Sure, why not?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Or yeah. Show that you're crazy.

[Brian Green]

Yes. If someone said, you gotta make half naked dance videos with two knives in your hand every day. You know, act crazy. But unlimited resources, right.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

All day long.

[Brian Green]

All day long. Yes, I would do that. That is a trade off I'd be willing to have. Yeah. You know, why not? I. Speaking of bathroom, like videos and the reason Why I think it's funny is because Brittany made a video at, like, a sushi place where she was claiming that the guy that she was with is an idiot or whatever.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, you were saying that.

[Brian Green]

But she's, like, in the bathroom of a public restaurant doing this. Right? And then there is other people who have been pointing out that some people are taking bathroom selfies.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, yeah, that's been going on for a while. We know somebody.

[Brian Green]

We know somebody who does this. Who does this. Every fucking place she goes, without fail. She travels to an airport. There's a bathroom selfie in the airport. She travels to a far flung location. There's bathroom selfies and restaurants and clubs and hotels and bars and all these different places. Always taking a bathroom fucking selfie. A selfie in a public bathroom. And I'm not talking in a stall in the public part of the bathroom.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

With the mirror.

[Brian Green]

With the mirror and people behind her and, you know, toilet paper on her feet and, like, it's a little bit disconcerting. Why is the bathroom the place to take the selfies?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Bathroom selfies has been going on for a while. Like, the Kardashians were doing it for a while in their own beautiful bathrooms, of course. But, yeah, I think the bathroom selfie's been around.

[Brian Green]

Okay. Bathroom selfie in your own house, your hotel room, or a private bathroom that you have had access. That you have access to. Understood. If as long as it's tastefully done, you're not showing the shitter or something like that. But why the public. Public bathroom selfies? I cannot for the life of me understand why this girl does this. It drives me up a wall. It really does. I want it. I'm not going to, but I want to say to her, what the fuck are you doing? Why. Why the bathroom? Show us where you're at. Show us the inside of the restaurant, the far flung location, the airplanes taking off behind you. There's so much more scenery than the fucking Urano. Well, not a urinal in her case.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

You get what I'm saying? All right. I don't get. Doesn't matter how good you look. It really doesn't.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, they must be getting positive reinforcement from somewhere to keep doing it.

[Brian Green]

I think some people are just delusional enough to think they're getting positive reinforcement, like, no news is good news kind of thing. Like, people love this. They love when I take a hot dump and then do a selfie. All I can smell when I look at those selfies is a fart. Yes, that's all I can smell. I don't. No, it's like my mind, like I see a picture of, I don't know, apple pie on. I smell apple pie. Right. Whenever I see those bathroom selfies, I smell the i75 restroom south of Valdosta. That's what I smell. I don't know why. So it's not pleasant to me to look at those bathroom selfies because I'm like, oh, God, it's gotta smell terrible. I know it smells terrible in there. And here you are dolling yourself up, parading around for the world. You know, you're.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

A lot of those high end restaurants, though, have nice bathrooms, I have to say, with wonderful smells in them.

[Brian Green]

Fair enough. I've been in plenty of very nice bathrooms of very nice smells. You know, it's really the best smells in all the business as far as I'm concerned. The Ritz Carlton. Oh, the Ritz, Yeah, they do have the. That's the best in the business right there. And as far as like really high traffic public bathrooms. Disney World. Disney World has some pretty good smelling bathrooms.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, that, that's surprising, but good to know.

[Brian Green]

Well, they got. They have like one attendant per bathroom or two or three. Yeah. Because I mean, on a busy day you really gotta keep up with that shit. No pun intended. Shit.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

There's a sushi place here that has really nice smells.

[Brian Green]

Oh, really? Where was I the other day that I thought to myself, wow, that's a. That's a nice smelling bathroom. I forgot where I was. It was like the kids hair cuttery.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh.

[Brian Green]

And I walk in and it's like.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

You know, it's a nice touch.

[Brian Green]

It is a nice touch to smell a nice bathroom.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yes.

[Brian Green]

You know, when I was working at McDonald's, cleaning, cleaning up all the shitters. Not. Not always the nicest smell. But I'll never forget that the guy who was managing the restaurant, the general manager at the time when I first started working there, and also Dino Venturi from the Trattoria, they both said the same thing. Our guests will judge us not on the food, not on the ambiance, and almost not on the customer service. If all those things are average, you know what? The GUS will judge us on the cleanliness and the smell of the bathroom.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Right.

[Brian Green]

And I thought to myself, you are fucking out of your mind. But now I agree because I also oftentimes judge a place by the cleanliness and the smell of the restaurant.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, definitely.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Interesting. Interesting thought, Brian. How we got here, I don't know, but that's okay. That's the nature of the commercial break. Okay, so selfies, bathrooms. Selfies, bathrooms. That's right. Halloween is coming up.

[Rachel]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

One of my favorite times of the year. You know, I have my place all decorated.

[Brian Green]

I know you do. We're collecting things around here, too. The years have gone by, and we started collecting. The kids ask more and more for Halloween decorations.

[Carol Kornacki]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

And so we're doing our best to not get too caught up in all of it. You know, I don't want to spend a thousand dollars a year on Halloween decorations.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

No, but you. That is the thing. Each year you can build.

[Brian Green]

We add one or two things. Yeah, we add one or two things, and they get very excited, and they are super excited about Halloween this year. Super excited.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

So fun.

[Unknown Male Speaker]

It is.

[Brian Green]

I can understand. It's a fun time, and we've made it fun. Like, my mom and dad did not make it fun for us. It was not like the wor. But also the time that I grew up, like, Halloween was. It was coming into its own. Right. But I would say I was a little young than. I would say, like, peak. Halloween is, like, 90s, early 2000s. Right. For kids. Kids. Kids. Like, we didn't have trunk or treat at my school. I think we got to dress up on Halloween.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Started happening after Covid, Right.

[Brian Green]

Or was it before COVID It was before COVID really. But it really blossomed during COVID because trunk or treat is when you go to a school and you park your car and you open up your trunk, and the kids walk around and grab candy. They trick or treat, essentially, in the trunks, which. And you.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Cars and candy.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I know. It's weird.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Come here, little kid.

[Brian Green]

Come here, little children.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Just a little closer to my trunk.

[Brian Green]

Inside.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yes. Get in there real deep.

[Brian Green]

Get in my 1976 Wagoneer with a waterbed. Come closer. What? This is the community college. I thought it was trunk or treat day, Girls. It's not community college softball. Girls softball. Trunk or treat. I must have had that wrong. So, you know, I might have been a little young. I might have been a little old, actually. I might have missed the kind of.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Plus, you were a hobo one year, and so.

[Brian Green]

A hobo one year. And then my mom repurposed the entire thing. I used the same suspenders and the same pants, and she put a cape on and caked me in white makeup and then had, like, I had the fake fangs, and she put blood down my chin. Yes. But when I came home from school, half the white makeup had ended up on the cape, and so I just looked like a blotchy white makeup.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Any type of full face makeup is never just a good idea.

[Brian Green]

No, it wasn't a good idea then. It's not a good idea now. I ended up looking like a blotchy. I look. I ended up looking like I had a rash is what happened. There's still pictures of it. It's kind of cute. I'm kind of cute, I do have to admit, but I just never really got into Halloween, and I'm not into it now, but I'm making sure that the kids are having their Halloween time so that they can enjoy it. So with Halloween right around the corner, I think it's important that we take a time. Take time to look on the flip side of things and how Halloween may not be good for our kids and how it may in fact be a doorway, a portal to hell, a portal to hel. In Satan. And so, yes, crazy, of course. And so when we get back, Carol Kaki is a was back in the early 90s, late 80s, early 90s, was a very famous former witch who used to run around telling about the perils and pitfalls of Halloween. And this one day a year when the portal to hell opens up and allows all the demons and witchcraft. Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I'm just picturing it opening up.

[Brian Green]

Just a bunch of Carol Kornackis, like Midwestern women kind of like a pothole with their Laura Ashley dresses on, like, ah, flying around.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That would be scary.

[Brian Green]

If you went to a Laura ashley in the 80s. That. That was a portal to hell right there. I don't know what was going on in back, but I'm sure it couldn't have been any good. All right, so let's take a break, and when we get back, we'll. We'll hear from Carol.

[Rachel]

Hey, it's Rachel, your new voice of God here on tcb. And just like you, I'm wondering just how much longer this podcast can continue. Let's all rejoice that another episode has made it to your ears. And I'll rejoice that my check is in the mail. Speaking of mail, get your free TCB sticker in the mail by going to tcbpodcast.com and visiting the contact Us page. You can also find the entire commercial break library audio and video, just in case you want to look at [e-mail] Want your voice to be on an episode of the show? Leave us a message at 212-4333, TCB. That's 212-433-3822. Tell us how much you love us and we'll be sure to let the world know on a future episode. Or you could make fun of us. That'd be fine too. We might not air that, but maybe. Oh, and if you're shy, that's okay. Just send a text. We'll respond. Now I'm gonna go check the mailbox for payment while you check out our sponsors and then we'll return to this episode of the commercial break.

[Brian Green]

This episode is sponsored by our longtime sponsor, Squarespace. I am working on a new project information tbd. It's very secretive. It's very hush hush around here because, you know, podcast secrets are a thing. Anywho, there is only one all in one website tool that's designed to help my new project stand out and be successful. And that one tool is Squarespace. Squarespace can help me through every step of the process. The launch, the scaling, the branding, and the growth. No matter what part of the journey I am on. Squarespace is an all in one website platform, so it'll cater to my needs every step of the way. There are so many benefits services and tools built into Squarespace, I would need a 10 minute commercial to name them all. Cutting edge design, search engine optimization tools, domain management, analytics, email campaigns, the ability to host videos, and most importantly, the ability to get paid. So if you've been thinking about building or upgrading your website, now's the time to head to squarespace.com commercial for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, make sure to use the offer code commercial to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. That's squarespace.com commercial. Then be sure to use the code commercial when you're ready to launch. Squarespace has been with the commercial break for a long time, and we have been with Squarespace for even longer. This is a company we trust, it's a product we use. And there's one overarching reason why it makes my life easier. Go build yourself a beautiful website squarespace.com commercial and thank you to Squarespace for being a sponsor of the commercial break.

[Carol Kornacki]

What's up guys? It's Candice Dillard Bassett, former Real Housewife of Potomac.

[Brian Green]

And I'm Michael Arsenault, author of the New York Times bestseller I Can't Date Jesus. And this is Undomesticated, the podcast where we aren't just saying the quiet parts out loud. We're putting it all on the kitchen table and INV you to the function. If you're Ready for some bold takes and a little bit of chaos? Welcome to Undomesticated. Follow and listen to Undomesticated. Available wherever you get your podcasts.

[Unknown Male Speaker]

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[Brian Green]

Okay, and we're back. We're here. I'd like you to take a listen. Chrissy to the. I just want. I just want you to be aware. I know Halloween's a favorite holiday of yours.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yes, it is.

[Brian Green]

But I just want you to be aware of some of the warning signs in case, you know, all that fun starts to turn into like, you know, a bloody vampire romp and people are getting murdered and dismembered.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Okay, let's see what she's got to say. I'm open.

[Brian Green]

I hope you're up on your Bible verses. Okay, here we go. Carol Kornacki, by the way, from Christ Ministries.

[Carol Kornacki]

Their priests were called the Druids, or referred to as sorcerers. Wise men. They dabbled in darkness and death.

[Rachel]

They were evil dabbling.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, it's hard to take that voice seriously. Dabbled in darkness and death. From testimony from a former witch, it.

[Carol Kornacki]

Was said that they drank blood. It was known that the Druids drank blood and were involved in human sacrifice. They believe that?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, because Christians were never bloodthirsty either. Come on, Carol, get it together.

[Carol Kornacki]

Stonehenge in England was built by these priests and that it was a place of human sacrifice.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I'm sorry, I'm picturing priests, like, trying to. To prop up big, huge rocks.

[Brian Green]

This will fool them. This is a great place For Satan worship. And in the background, there's a picture of a lady standing in front of lions.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I don't know what's.

[Brian Green]

Are those lions or lambs or dogs or what's going on there?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I don't know. Coyotes, wolves.

[Brian Green]

I don't know. It's interesting.

[Carol Kornacki]

Stories have it and legend has it as fact.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I don't know. That's a weird photograph in history has.

[Carol Kornacki]

It that these druids on the eve of Samhain, October 31, would take wicker baskets and would put.

[Brian Green]

They would fill them with ghostly treats like, I don't know, Froot Loops, Fig Newtons.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Suckers.

[Brian Green]

Suckers. That's right. Portals to Satanism.

[Carol Kornacki]

Humans in them and stuff.

[Brian Green]

Oh, that's a different kind of treat.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Humans in the wicker baskets.

[Brian Green]

Here, have a finger. My name is Ed Gein.

[Carol Kornacki]

Them ablaze and burn. Humans listening to them screeching and screaming as sacrifices to the God of the dead.

[Brian Green]

That's a big wicker basket. Put a whole human in there.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah. And that. They're not even dead.

[Brian Green]

No, you just throw them in there and set them on fire. Yeah. Who hasn't? It's Halloween. What's a little. What's Halloween without a wicker basket? Fire. Full of humans.

[Carol Kornacki]

The Grim Reaper. These evil druids celebrated Halloween with great excitement. It was set at a time when all the evil.

[Brian Green]

Has this woman ever enjoyed an orgasm, do you think? Probably when she was a witch?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, yeah.

[Brian Green]

Back in her witch days, evil wicked.

[Carol Kornacki]

Spirits were loose to come out of their dark abode and walk the earth, tormenting the humans. And so the druids taught the cats, taught them to dress up in weird ghoulish outfits and put out little fruit.

[Brian Green]

Little human heads for people to eat. Little fruit baskets. Little fruit baskets.

[Carol Kornacki]

What? Send vegetables on their porches of their homes so that these wicked, evil ghouls and fairies and spirits would not harm their home or attack their lives.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The vegetables and the fruits were the. That kept it away.

[Brian Green]

And it wards off all the evil, murderous ghouls and goblins. You say, hey, I know you want my.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Here's an apple and a zucchini. Stay away.

[Brian Green]

I know you want my firstborn, but listen, what about some zucchini? You like a gourd? I got a couple gourds. They're not. I don't like them, but you might like them. Snap peas. Hey, get those frozen snap peas, honey. The ghouls and goblins are here to take you away.

[Carol Kornacki]

It was almost like a treat so that the spirits wouldn't do mischief. A trick. Every time your child chants trick or treat, he is again repeating an age old pagan festival.

[Brian Green]

Oh God. Listen, Halloween's gonna be miserable this year, kids. You can't say trick or treat anymore. Say, I don't know, dick or meat. Yeah. Say I want candy. Say dick or meat.

[Carol Kornacki]

He is partaking in an age old pagan festival of death.

[Brian Green]

Holy spirit.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Wow.

[Brian Green]

It's hard to believe that my two year old trick or treat is opening up a portal to pagan gospels.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Repeating ancient pagan rituals called up by.

[Carol Kornacki]

Sam Hayen, the God of the dead, Sammy Hagar.

[Brian Green]

What we were just talking about Gavo Wavo. Say it ain't so.

[Carol Kornacki]

Wander the earth for a while. The people were able in Scotland, in England, in Europe, there to appease them with their little offerings of food, their tree. But the demand got greater as the wickedness grew.

[Brian Green]

Ah, yes. The greedy goblins and ghouls and zombies of the afterworld always want more.

[Carol Kornacki]

And the druids would then instruct the people that these little food treats were not enough. Now these spirits were demanding a larger sacrifice. And so the townspeople would begin to bring animal sacrifices. Cats and dogs.

[Brian Green]

Chicken nuggets from McDonald's, tiny little, shaped.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Like a little pumpkin.

[Brian Green]

Roast beef sandwiches from Arby's. Where's the meat? That's how where's the Meats Got started. It's a pagan ritual.

[Carol Kornacki]

Lambs. And at times, as the increase of demand came, they would literally take goats and slaughter them for the wicked spirits and take the heads of the goats and put them on sticks to be seen representing the sacrifice offered to Sam Hayen, the God of the dead, that his wicked and evil spirits.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I haven't heard of Sam Hayen.

[Brian Green]

No, I haven't heard of Sam Hayen either, but I didn't know Sam was a. That's a ancient God of the dead. Yeah, let's see. Hold on one second. We got to talk to chat TCB about this. Quite frankly. Hold on one second because I didn't know Sam Hand was so. Okay, here. Let's see here. Hey, Chat. Who is Sam Hayen when it comes to the druids and Halloween lore.

[ChatGPT]

Absolutely. I'm right here. Just let me know what you need and we'll dive right in.

[Brian Green]

I need to know who Sam Hayen is when it comes. When? As it pertains to Halloween.

[Carol Kornacki]

Sure.

[ChatGPT]

So Samhain, pronounced a bit like salmon, is actually an ancient Celtic festival. Not a person. It's basically the histor.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

She hasn't heard of it either.

[ChatGPT]

Celebrated around October 31 to November 1. Samhain marked the end of the harvest season and the beginning of winter. In Gaelic culture, people believe that during Samhain, the boundary between the living world and the spirit world got really thin, so spirits could cross over more easily. A lot of Halloween traditions we have today, like dressing up in costumes, are rooted in those old Samhain customs meant to ward off or mimic spirits. So in a nutshell, Samhain is kind of the ancestor of Halloween, but that's.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

An actual festival God of the dead.

[Brian Green]

It's a day. It's not a God of the dead. So. And. And by the way, I can guarantee that a lot of the things that she's saying here are just pure conjecture. She's making it up whole cloth. Or it's a misinterpretation, a religious interpretation meant to suit her needs. There's a lot of words in the Bible, and you could pretty much find any. You could find any argument or support Any argument with some of those words.

[Carol Kornacki]

Would do them no harm. It is also.

[Brian Green]

But imagine it's 1986, 4 or 5, whatever it is, and your parents are sitting there watching her talk about Sam Hayen. And your dad and mom are like, sam Hayen. I'll be God damned if my kids are gonna worship Sam Hayen.

[Carol Kornacki]

Leave denial, right?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Carol Kornacki]

Is studied as a practicing witch. That the 31st was a time when Diana, the goddess that I worshiped as a practicing witch, would go into a deep sleep.

[Brian Green]

Do Diana. Diana, the ancient witch Diana.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

That's who she worshiped.

[Brian Green]

Yes. She was a witch.

[Carol Kornacki]

Because in witchcraft you believe in different gods. Diana being the major one. When I practiced back when I practice, it was Diana.

[Brian Green]

Now it's Suzanne. I don't know. They keep switching it up.

[Carol Kornacki]

It's thought that as she slept, you could come in great communication with the dead. It was said that on this particular day that the screen between life and death was very thin as wickedness grew in those days and. And Halloween, or sewing, as it is called, was celebrated.

[Brian Green]

The suit. So weed. I bet that's too. Yeah.

[Carol Kornacki]

Man. Became greater. And now humans were demanded.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Why is wickedness just spreading exponentially from when they started?

[Brian Green]

I don't know. And why are the dead people so wicked? You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't get it.

[Carol Kornacki]

In gruesome dressed up outfits to entertain the wicked spirits to partake of their evil on that evening. And they would come to the homes of these innocent villagers and they would come up demanding a virgin as a sacrifice.

[Brian Green]

Oh, here we Go. It's always the virgins.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

We need a virgin.

[Brian Green]

Virgins. Virgins. Virgins. Virgins. Well, I'm not a virgin, so pick someone else. That's why you gotta get laid as soon as possible, kids. That way ward off the spirits. Yes. When Suein comes, doesn't end up taking you.

[Carol Kornacki]

The New Year celebration, October 31st. They would tell these frightened families that if you did not give us a virgin sacrifice to appease the wicked spirits.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, what if they didn't have a virgin?

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I don't think. And when in history did this happen? If you don't give us a. If you ain't got a virgin, we'll take one of your. We'll take one of your heifers. And if that heifer is unclean or also not a virgin, we'll take one of your sheep. And if your sheep isn't there. Do you have a hand available? I'd like a hand shandy.

[Carol Kornacki]

Someone in your house would die by morning. That virgin must be offered. And they would go off in these ghoulish outfits. If a child was.

[Brian Green]

She's so dramatic. She's telling a campfire. Yeah.

[Carol Kornacki]

This is a campfire tale Art produced by Daybreak. A blood hexagram was put on the home of that parent.

[Brian Green]

Oh.

[Carol Kornacki]

With an evil face on the heart of that parent.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

My God.

[Brian Green]

On the door right there. Right when you woke up. Well, honey, two years in a row, we done got the blood hexagram now. Where's little Jeannie Lou? Well, we better get to. We're gonna need a new virgin for next year.

[Carol Kornacki]

To a squash in those days. Or a pumpkin setting on their porch with burning coal within. Lighting up this gruesome face.

[Brian Green]

Ooh.

[Carol Kornacki]

And if the virgin wasn't produced, the family would die. It is meant.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

The family would die. That's it.

[Brian Green]

Caroline, you're a bundle of fun. You're a bucket of lunch.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I want to know how she got from which to where she's at now.

[Brian Green]

There are videos of that, and I had considered reviewing that, but it's very heavy on the scripture, and I don't want to sit and listen to all that shit.

[Carol Kornacki]

Yeah, evil this.

[Brian Green]

Oh, by the way, she's holding up one of those that every child of a certain age had in their front window. A picture of a cartoon witch riding a broomstick with bats flying around her head. You know, you'd stick them on your front window or your door. Or your door is not cute.

[Carol Kornacki]

Ladies and gentlemen, this is a representation whose face roots are in Satanism.

[Brian Green]

But There's a cute little cat behind her.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I know, I mean, peeking out over.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, come on.

[Carol Kornacki]

This is nothing that God honors or wants in your home.

[Brian Green]

You talk to him personally? He called you up? I'm just asking, Asking for a friend. You and God are in commune, are you?

[Carol Kornacki]

It's a time when we have to ask ourselves, do I want my children out celebrating a holiday when I know for a fact the newspapers, the secular newspapers will report the highest, highest amount of break ins into animal shelters.

[Brian Green]

What?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I didn't expect him to go there. Break ins into animal shelters? Okay.

[Brian Green]

Oh my God, this is. I mean she is just so full of shit trying to make her point. Is it true that the number one day for animal shelter break ins is on Halloween?

[ChatGPT]

You know, it's a fascinating but kind of eerie little fact. Halloween does tend to see a bit of a spike in some weird incidents and animal shelter break ins can be one of them. It's mostly because there's that old superstition around black cats. And unfortunately some people doing not so nice things on Halloween night. Shelters actually sometimes take extra precautions to keep animals safe around that time. So it's kind of a good reminder that, that Halloween has all these interesting and sometimes a little darker layers to it beyond just the fun costumes and candy.

[Brian Green]

Okay, so what's being reported a lot is that people are taking black cats from the shelters.

[ChatGPT]

Yeah, exactly. That's one of the big concerns that tends to.

[Brian Green]

Okay.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

All right, well, okay, well we'll.

[Brian Green]

Score one for Carol there. But on the same note, quote, it's likely that what Carol is telling you is to scare you, when in fact the truth, while weird, is a lot less threatening than what she's saying.

[Carol Kornacki]

Find the highest amount of animals that have been dissected, bled, murdered, sacrificed. It is a time when there's diced.

[Brian Green]

Dissected, chopped up and put into smoothies. Matcha teas full of little tiny puppets. Puppy matchas. Quincy, could you deal with the reality.

[Carol Kornacki]

Of Halloween frenzy of murder? This is not a time of celebration and candy. Do you want your children out walking around partaking, knowing I'll take any time.

[Brian Green]

Away from my children to be honest with you. Go ahead, go to the shelters or whatever, go dice up the puppy smoothies. I just need a break.

[Carol Kornacki]

That it is a celebration, a holy day of the God of the dead. Can you? Absolutely, with a clear mind, hearing these things and knowing its root, say that God doesn't mind. You know, the Bible says in Deuteronomy regard.

[Brian Green]

Ah, Deuteronomy, the scariest of all Bible.

[Carol Kornacki]

Chapters, Deuteronomy them not that do sorcery and witchcraft that are spiritualists. If you look and you find out what regard them not means, it literally means have nothing to do with them. The Lord expressly states, regard them not.

[Brian Green]

Means regard them not means have nothing to do with them.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Thank you for the translation.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, thank you for the translation. We didn't know English, but now we do.

[Carol Kornacki]

This reason I will drive them out of the lands before you because they are an abomination. Those people who regard sorcery, witchcraft, spiritualism, the occult and the practice of what they hold sacred is an abomination to God.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, but there's always the hottest girls, you know, the goth ones, they're always the hottest. They make good music, they have good sex. I mean, I only know because I'm.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Sure you dated one.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, I've dated one. I'm sure the boys do too. I dated more than one. I mean, listen, this is a well known fact that the ones who open up the portals to the pagan old rituals, they're great in bed. Okay, what do you want me to say?

[Carol Kornacki]

And those that partake are partaking of that which God calls in a body. What do I tell my.

[Brian Green]

What happened there? I don't know.

[Carol Kornacki]

When I say to them, you won't be going out this year. We won't be celebrating or acknowledging a holy day that witches throughout the world.

[Brian Green]

Will celebrate, they instantly become the weirdest kids in school. That's what happens. Now I know that there are people who have religions that do not celebrate. Like there are certain religions that do not celebrate Halloween. There's certain cultures that do not celebrate Halloween. But if you walk in and say, I'm not going to be opening up a door to the pagan, you know, rituals of the Druids, because mommy said so, then I could guarantee you, I don't know you.

[Rachel]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

May not be sitting next to someone.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

At lunch crying and screaming. That will go on will be like a door has been open to hell.

[Brian Green]

Yes. Dress my kids up as Mickey Mouse and Gabby Dollhouse and Peppa Pig. It's. I'm not the. You know. And when I got older. Yes. Did I have scary masks? Of course. Because that's what teenagers do. They get interested in the dark side of life. You start to understand that there are other things in life besides all the Mickey Mouse, Peppa Pigs, Gabby Dollhouses of the world. You start to realize that the world is sometimes black and not always white. Is sometimes white and not always black. And all the other Things evil and not good movies. Yeah. Plus they're scary movies. Scary movies are what teenagers like. You liked them, too, when you were a teenager. Look at you. You were a witch. You admitted on another show you used to sleep on graves because you thought that was the thing to do. Yeah. And you really swung very far to the office.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Very far.

[Brian Green]

You are now a fucking fun sponge. And we will hear more when we get back.

[Carol Kornacki]

Okay.

[Rachel]

You're probably wondering why I, Rachel, have taken over the voice duties at tcb. It's pretty simple. Astrid asked me to shut Brian up, even for a minute. Well, lovely Astrid, your wish is my command. Do you want to help Astrid, too?

[Carol Kornacki]

You know you do.

[Rachel]

Leave a message for her or me or Chrissy at 212-4333, TCB. That's 212-433-3822. You can be on the show, too. Just call and say something, anything. Or text us and we'll text you right back.

[Brian Green]

Back.

[Rachel]

Promise. Then head over to tcbpodcast.com and get your free sticker. It's your constitutional right to a sticker, and we must abide. You get the point? Follow us on Instagram at the commercial break and watch all the episodes on [e-mail] the commercial break. Best to you and Astrid, especially Astrid.

[Brian Green]

Come to DSW for the shoes. Stay for the fun. Because let's be honest, if shoe shopping isn't fun, are you even doing it right? So go ahead, try something new. Try something different.

[Carol Kornacki]

Good different.

[Brian Green]

Try something that feels like you. You know, the real you. And then definitely brag about it later. Because at dsw, you've got unlimited freedom to play. Find the shoes that get you at prices that get your budget at DSW stores [e-mail] Let us surprise you.

[Rachel]

You buy a pair of socks. That's two socks. You buy a pair of Bombas socks, that's four socks. Because one purchased is one don. Socks are the number one most requested clothing item in homeless shelters. So when you buy a pair of super comfortable Bombas socks, you're also donating a pair. Bombus customers have powered over 150 million donations. So Bombas would like to thank you 150 million times. But we only have, like, 30 seconds. Go to bombas.com and use code audio for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O-M B-S.com and use code audio at checkout.

[Brian Green]

Hey, Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. Now, I don't know if you've heard, but Mint's Premium Wireless is $15 a month. But I'd like to offer one other perk. We have no stores. That means no small talk. Crazy weather we're having. No, it's not. It's just weather. It is an introvert's dream. Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment.

[Rachel]

Of $45 for three month plan. $15 per month equivalent required. New customer offer first three months only, then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See mintmobile.com.

[Brian Green]

The weird thing is I do remember this lady, like from my childhood. I remember her being on television.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Like, she does look familiar.

[Brian Green]

Oprah or Donahue or something like that. Yeah, yeah, she looks familiar. She sounds familiar. Okay, here she goes.

[Carol Kornacki]

It's rooted in evil and death. That is literally a night for Satan and wicked evil demons to walk the earth. What do you say to your kids? I'm gonna tell you what you say to your kids.

[Brian Green]

Okay, kids, have fun and have.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Don't talk to ghouls.

[Brian Green]

And don't eat any of the Reese's pieces or the KitKats. Save those for Daddy. And if you get murdered by a monstrous beast, please bequeath me your candy basket. Thank you.

[Carol Kornacki]

You tell your kids the truth. You tell your children the truth. You explain these things to them. You say, well, Carol, you know, it's gory and it seems kind of icky. How do I tell my children these things? Ladies and gentlemen, they see enough and hear enough. Between television and what they learn at school and what they hear through music, that I don't think anything you can share in honesty, considering this holiday is icky and weird.

[Brian Green]

It is weird. You're gonna tell them weird stuff and then they're gonna go to the Druids and sacrifice and burning people in wicker baskets. And Sammy Hagar is the devil, and he was just in a couple years in Van Halen. I didn't like him either. But, you know, whatever.

[Carol Kornacki]

I think we need to sit our children down and teach them in the way that they should go and tell them, ladies and gentlemen, you cannot redeem Halloween. You cannot go out with a clear conscience partaking in a holiday that is rooted in Satanism. That during that night when your children are parading the streets dressed up in. You might say, well, I don't dress my children up in anything ghoulish. My little girl goes out as an angel. Or my little boy, he's dressed up as a shepherd.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Speaking to your point.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, she's speaking to my point. Here we go. She's about to knock my whole Halloween off its blocks.

[Carol Kornacki]

It is a day of celebration that comes from darkness and evil. 4000 years old.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I mean, she is a buzzkill.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, she is a fucking hot. Really Like a wet sponge. There's nothing fun about this lady. I would not want her at any of my parties.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

No.

[Brian Green]

You are disinvited to any commercial break parties. Party that we will ever think and then not do.

[Carol Kornacki]

Throwing a day that celebrates death and murder and violence. And while our children are out partaking, death and murder and violence will be occurring in this country and countries throughout this world. I wanted so badly on that day because of my practice of witchcraft to communicate with the dead. I knew that through my study and my involvement.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. This lady, if she was in fact ever a witch, which I question. I question it's this long before the Internet. You could do research. I highly question this. Or if she's manufactured by the church or some religious organization to give some kind of. Give some credibility.

[Rachel]

Right?

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Some credit perspective. But if she was a witch, then she's seen some, you know, and she must know that that's much more fun than all this bullshit.

[Carol Kornacki]

That it was a day when they.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Make as much money as the thing.

[Brian Green]

Well, that's true, you know, it's always the one. That's right. You start saying Deuteronomy and people pass up the basket.

[Carol Kornacki]

It's a very thin cloud that I could pass through. It was during this time, in preparation for the eve of Samhayen, I would prepare myself with all kinds of spells and things for that particular night. And it was on that night that I would desire to go deeper into communication with spirits. And through that I became very deeply possessed by the spirits that I invited in for what I thought was power. This was the great night, the holy.

[Brian Green]

Day, the day of orgies, crystal meth and hot bikers pounding us all from behind on a grave, desecrating a grave somewhere.

[Carol Kornacki]

The celebration of death. Ladies and gentlemen, as I sit back.

[Brian Green]

Today, and I. Ladies and gentlemen of the court. That's what she sounds like, a lawyer.

[Carol Kornacki]

See some of the most precious innocent Christians as well as people that are not Christians, yielding their children to the celebration of death and blood. Death and fire, it was called back in the days of the Druids. It breaks my heart to think what an in that Satan gets into the homes when we know, you know, Jesus said when you. Human sacrifice.

[Brian Green]

Oh, they're cutting out all the like religious stuff for some reason.

[Carol Kornacki]

Bonfires. You hear the expression bonfires?

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Damn. I was just with that, you know, that Mayan priestess. And we had a bonfire where all the bonfires we can't do. Now that's. Bonfires are out. Trick or treat is out. Candy's out. Dressing up is out. I'm sure fucking's out. That's gotta be out.

[Carol Kornacki]

Oh, yeah, the word bonefires.

[Brian Green]

Oh, bonfires. Bonefires. Oh, yeah. All right, here we go.

[Carol Kornacki]

As off.

[Brian Green]

Good old Bonefire. I've been to a few of those. Oh, yeah? Oh, God. Oh, have I been to a bonfire or two. Usually comes with a couple hippies drumming.

[Carol Kornacki]

On their Congos bring sacrificial offerings to powers of darkness. On this particular night, humans would burn, would be thrown into fires. Babies would be sacrificed.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Babies?

[Brian Green]

What? At the bone fire. It sounds like so much fun. Why would you sacrifice babies at the bone fire?

[Carol Kornacki]

When you look at some of the decorations that we put around their house, you have to wonder the root and the purpose. Let's look at this one, for example. Ghouls and this jack o' lantern with a cute little smiling face.

[Brian Green]

Yes.

[Carol Kornacki]

And it all looks so innocent and cute, doesn't it?

[Brian Green]

It does, yes.

[Carol Kornacki]

But that's not the root where this came from. Just because you change the faces, it doesn't change where it came from and what it really represents. But it's got to be made cute to draw you and your children. The little ghosts on each side represent the evil wandering spirits. They're ghouls who were demanded to give a virgin child. And yet.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, my God, it's not happening anymore. Yeah, it's turned to just candy.

[Brian Green]

That's right.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Let's make the ghouls cute.

[Brian Green]

It's the marshmallow Stay Puff guy. It's not the mer. You know, it's not some murderous ghoul that. That looks like the cutest ghost I have ever seen.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

No, that's like a little Casper.

[Brian Green]

And they're not drawing you into anything. You are taking it too far. Now. I know, like, 20 years ago, 30 years ago, that this was put out. Forty years ago, this was put out. So, Carol, I hope you've chilled out since then, or you might. Might not even be around anymore. But honestly, like, I don't think I. I've never thought, even in, like, my most kind of teenage darkness years, like when I was listening to Metallica and Megadeth and Ra. Right. I never really bought into the whole Satanism thing. It was never like. Like I knew people who thought they were buying into the Satanism thing. I knew stories of people, like urban legends of people who went down the certain road and saw the Satanist, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Well, there are Satanist people, but they don't just celebrate on Halloween.

[Brian Green]

No. And. And paganism is. Paganism, which some people refer to as Satanism, can often be a celebration of Mother Earth and people twist it up into this weird, you know, fighting for evil. Now, I'm sure there's people, sure, there's people out there. Out there who worship the. The nature, the negativity of evil. I'm sure of it. But this is not generally how most people are celebrating Halloween. They're getting dressed up in tight outfits and going to a bar and getting smashed with their friends, or they're dressing up as Peppa Pig and they're knocking on someone's door hoping to get another sucker from someone else. That's typically how it goes. It's not. This is not what Carol claims that it is. Not anymore. Maybe, maybe that. Maybe it has its roots and some weird bullshit, but that's not anymore. Yeah, but so does the Bible, Carol. Yeah. Yeah. They were sacrificing lambs, killing Christians, hunting people down because they didn't believe in this or didn't believe in that.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yep.

[Brian Green]

So come on, let's get it together, Carol.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Oh, Carol and Sam and Diana.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Sammy Hagar and dirty Diana.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

I really hope that Carol, at some point in the last 40 years, you know, I don't know, watch Love is Blind or.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Which, by the way, be caught up.

[Brian Green]

On you 50 shades of gray and had an orgasm. No, I haven't. I haven't started to watch it yet. Is it good?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah, I mean, it's Love Is Mine.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. There's some drama that they're creating that makes it good.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yeah.

[Brian Green]

All right. I'm watching Slow Horses right now. I just finished as we talked about the Ed Gein story and of course, I'm up to date on Task.

[Carol Kornacki]

Yes.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Such a good show.

[Brian Green]

Task is amazing. It is amazing. It is amazing. It should win every award Mark Ruffalo gives another. Another amazing performance.

[Rachel]

Yeah, it's.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

It's a great show.

[Brian Green]

He is one of the actors of our time and so is the other guy. Who plays the other guy?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Yes, Jamie.

[Brian Green]

Yeah, Jamie. Jamie. Is that his name?

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

Plays Jamie.

[Brian Green]

Play is his name. Jamie.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I think it was Jamie.

[Brian Green]

Who is. And Task. Let's see here. Who's the actor, though? Task cast.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

You better watch the extras.

[Brian Green]

Yeah. Oh, Tom Pelfrey is Robbie. Robbie. Tom Pelfrey is Robbie.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

He's really good.

[Brian Green]

He is so fucking good. He's from Guiding Light.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I knew he looked familiar.

[Brian Green]

He's from Guiding Light.

[Unknown Male Speaker]

Light.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

I knew he looked familiar.

[Brian Green]

God damn, did he turn into such a superstar in this show? He's so good in this show.

[Rachel]

So good.

[Brian Green]

Okay, anyway, go watch Task. If you're not watching it, it's available on hbo. One more episode left, maybe just wait and then get it all done with in one day. So good. But I'll catch up on Love is Blind. We'll talk about it all next week. Chrissy's back. Everyone's back. Keep an eye out for after the break. More information will follow here here on the commercial break. And what else next week. Nacho Redondo from EDN here with me in studio. So please tune in on Tuesday tcbpodcast.com at the Commercial Break on Instagram YouTube.com the Commercial Break and 212-4333 TCB Questions, Comments? Concerns? Content? Ideas? Okay, Chrissy, that's all I can do today. I love you.

[Kristen Joy Hoadley]

And I love you besties and best.

[Brian Green]

You out there in the podcast universe. Until next time, Chrissy and I will say we do say and we must say goodbye.

[Rachel]

Arc Raiders, a multiplayer extraction adventure video game set in a lethal yet vibrant future earth. As a raider scavenging the remnants of a derelict world, you settle into an underground settlement hoping to thrive. You jump on the chance to start over. But doing so means you must return to the surface where arc machines roam and survivors motives reveal remain dangerously unclear. But if you're brave enough, who knows what you might find. Play the server Slam open test from October 17th through 19th on PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X and S and PC. When did making plans get this complicated? It's time to streamline with WhatsApp, the secure messaging app that brings the whole group together. Use polls to settle dinner plans, send event in invites and pin messages so no one forgets mom 60th and never miss a meme or milestone. All protected with end to end encryption. It's time for WhatsApp message privately with everyone. Learn [e-mail].

[Brian Green]

I'm Scott Hanson, host of NFL Red Zone. Lowe's Knows Sundays hit different when you earn them. We've got you covered with outdoor power equipment from Cobalt and everything you need to weather for proof your deck with Trex decking plus with lawn care from Scotts and of course pit boss grills and accessories, you can get a home field advantage all season long. So get to Lowe's, get it done and earn your Sunday. Lowe's official partner of the NFL Sam and Doug. Here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat, helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug. Limu is that guy with the binoculars. Watch.

[Carol Kornacki]

Watching us.

[Brian Green]

Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty Liberty Savings Fairy underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company affiliates excludes Massachusetts.