The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

“Best of DLS: We Have to Wrap, Tony” – December 30, 2025

Episode Overview

In this lively and quintessentially offbeat episode, Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, and the crew broadcast from the Elser Hotel in downtown Miami, offering their hilarious and occasionally chaotic takes on sports, pop-culture, and internet moments. This “Best of” edition’s main feature is an extended, delightfully absurd interview with Spice Adams (former NFL player and meme-extraordinaire), deep dives into the randomness of turnovers in football, and the infamous mayhem that ensues when a Red Baron Pizza rep abruptly interrupts the show with demands to “wrap.” The episode shifts between silliness and incisive sports commentary, punctuated by running jokes about pizza, Tony’s real name, and the truly random nature of football analysis.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Absurd Pizza Debate

• Segment Begins: 03:23
  • The crew re-visits a critical and hilarious question: “If a slice of pizza could walk upright on two legs, would the crust be at the top or the bottom?”
  • Spice Adams’ Expert Take: “Crust goes on the bottom. Everybody knows that. Duh.” (06:10)
  • Spirited disagreement ensues among Dan, Stugotz, and Spice about whether the crust or pointy end constitutes the “bottom” of a slice, prompting a poll for listeners.

2. Spice Adams on His Career and Football Fingers

• Segment Begins: 08:20
  • Spice shares how he transitioned from NFL player to entertainer, noting he was “290 pounds at 12” and his mother insisted he play football.
  • Candid and comical stories about life as a lineman:
    • Spice Adams: “This is just how my fingers are… I can’t put my fingers on a flat surface. They all just pop right up.” (11:32)
    • Discussion of mangled “football fingers” and shoutouts to fellow players like Torry Holt and Brian Baldinger.

3. Penn State, Coaching, and Football Hosting Hot Takes

• Segment Begins: 15:10
  • Dan asks Spice about ex-Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger suggesting Mike Tomlin should leave the NFL for Penn State after coaching turmoil, with James Franklin’s departure.
  • Spice Adams: “I think they should just hire Terry Smith… he understands everything there is to know about Penn State football.” (17:07)
  • The segment veers into how leadership moves (or doesn’t) affect a program’s tradition and momentum.

4. The Meme That Took Over the Internet

• Segment Begins: 19:02
  • Spice explains the origins of his viral “yellow jacket, rubbing hands” meme—and promptly, playfully launches into a Red Baron pizza promo.
  • Dan (mock outrage): “That was total, unequivocal bullshit. What just happened at the end.” (21:54)

5. Red Baron Pizza Heart-Out Meltdown

• Segment Begins: 22:15
  • The interview abruptly ends when an unknown rep repeatedly yells “We’ve got to wrap, Tony!” causing confusion—since nobody realized “Tony” is Spice Adams’ real name.
  • The show erupts into meta-commentary about corporate time limits, the etiquette of remote interviews, and why guests shouldn’t hijack shows for advertisements.
  • Dan: “Your time constraints cannot be so 10 minutes that you’re yelling at me in the middle of what it is we’re talking about… Stop trying to break up with me. We broke up with you first.” (26:56)

6. Mockery and Fallout—Meta Comedy

• Segment Begins: 28:33
  • The crew relentlessly mocks the “We have to wrap, Tony!” interruption, debating whether the disembodied Zoom voice was a man or woman, and riffing on whose fault it was (“Tony,” the producer, or Dan).
  • Farcical wrestling with guest management, marketing intrusion, and the sanctity of live broadcasting take center stage.

7. The Trivia Debate: “Do We Put a Button or Bow On It?”

• Segment Begins: 36:41
  • The show pivots to an analysis of Clippers broadcasters going off-topic into a meta-discussion about closing phrases (“put a button on it” vs. “put a bow/pin on it”).
  • Jeremy: “To put a button on it comes from the theater world… to add a final touch.” (39:25)
  • Much mirth about phrases, broadcaster tangents, and trivia rabbit holes—classic Le Batard humor.

8. Football Deep Dive: The Randomness of Turnovers & NFL Analysis

• Segment Begins: 46:10
  • Dan leads a segment on the unpredictable nature of forced turnovers, contests that luck trumps preparation outside of pass rush.
  • Dan: “I don’t actually think the causing of turnovers is an ability.” (54:44)
  • The crew debates the legitimacy of “execution” in late-game scenarios and whether turnovers are random or coachable, citing the Panthers, Rams, and Chiefs as examples.
  • Key Stat: Cardinals have lost seven games by four points or less—further emphasizing randomness.

9. Rapid-Fire Picks, Playoff Scenarios, and Football Banter

• Segment Begins: 60:15
  • Fantasy football discussions, helmet-pick segments, and classic banter about panicked playoff teams and statistical quirks.
  • Riffs on how “the best team in football” can hinge on turnovers and late-game randomness.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Spice Adams on Pizza:
  “Crust goes on the bottom. Everybody knows that. Duh.” (06:10)

• Spice Adams on Transitioning After the NFL:
  “I retired, I felt like, man, what am I gonna do now? And I just kind of gravitated toward entertainment… everything all worked out.” (09:31)

• Dan on Marketing Interruptions:
  “We have to wrap. You have to wrap. Tony, go. Get out of here. Everyone. You that lady. Tony, we gotta go. Get out of here.” (23:55)
  “Stop trying to break up with me. We broke up with you first. The tie goes to Dan.” (26:56)

• Crew on Meta Humor and Chaos:
  “How is it that that person ended up live on air with… I thought it was David Sampson, like a drop of David Samson… Where is…? They’re on the Zoom listening, and then they mic themselves.” (24:27)

• Football Wisdom from Dan:
  “I don’t actually think the causing of turnovers is an ability… unless you have a pass rush.” (54:44)

• Jeremy On Phrases:
  “To put a button on it comes from the theater world where it means to add a final touch to a scene or provide closure, a sense of completion.” (39:25)

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |------------|---------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:23 | The walking pizza debate with Spice Adams | | 06:10 | Spice gives his “bottom = crust” ruling | | 08:20 | Spice’s football/entertainment journey and “football fingers” | | 15:10 | Penn State coaching and Mike Tomlin rumors | | 19:02 | The “yellow jacket meme” and sudden pizza promo | | 22:15 | Red Baron heart out, chaos, “We have to wrap, Tony!” begins | | 26:56 | Dan’s meta-rant about Zoom/interview interruptions | | 36:41 | Clippers broadcasters/trivia & “button/bow/pin” debate | | 46:10 | The randomness of turnovers and football analysis | | 54:44 | Dan’s argument: football turnovers aren’t recreatable | | 60:15 | Helmet/dentek/fantasy picks frenzy |

Final Thoughts

This episode is a vintage showcase of the Dan Le Batard Show’s fusion of silly and sharp. Featuring an instant-classic guest interview gone sideways (thanks to a pizza company’s overzealous PR rep), meta breakdowns about podcasting itself, and obsessive debates about the nature of football randomness, listeners are treated both to belly laughs and genuine insight. “We have to wrap, Tony!” is sure to become a running bit, and the deliberations on pizza anatomy and NFL turnovers will live rent-free in your mind.

If you missed this episode, you missed a high-wire act between chaos, comedy, and clever sports commentary—a Best of DLS entry for the ages.