Hour 1: 50 Hawks, 10 Crocs, 3 Brown Bears, 15 Wolves, A Hunter with a Rifle, 7 Buffalo, 10K Rats, 5 Gorillas, and 4 Lions (feat. Ron Magill)

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
Episode: Hour 1: 50 Hawks, 10 Crocs, 3 Brown Bears, 15 Wolves, A Hunter with a Rifle, 7 Buffalo, 10K Rats, 5 Gorillas, and 4 Lions (feat. Ron Magill)
Release Date: April 29, 2025

From the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, hosts Dan Le Batard and Stugotz, along with their co-hosts Amin Elhassan, Mike Ryan, Greg Cody, Billy Gil, and John Zaslow, delve into a wide array of topics ranging from sports controversies and office wedding antics to the complexities of the NFL draft and the intersection of sports with politics. The episode culminates in a gripping hypothetical survival scenario featuring Ron Magill.

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1. Weekend Sports Observations

The episode kicks off with a lively discussion on recent NBA happenings, focusing on questionable officiating that has intensified rivalries and impacted game outcomes.

• Officiating Woes: Amin Elhassan humorously critiques the NBA's referees, stating, "The NBA games getting ruined by officiating are back." [01:10]

• Pistons vs. Knicks Playoff Fiasco: The co-hosts highlight a particularly tumultuous playoff game between the Knicks and Pistons, marked by a "rock fight" with JB Bickerstaff at the helm. Amin remarks, "Nothing says Knicks Pistons playoffs like a 94, 93 rock fight." [02:02], while Greg adds, "Good on LT for telling him to F off." [14:11]

• Miami Heat's Struggles: There’s a critical take on the Miami Heat's performance, with Amin sarcastically applauding their minimal chances, "The H in Miami Heat stands for how embarrassing that 3% chance at Cooper flag." [02:55]

• Player Highlights: The discussion shifts to individual performances, with praise for Nas Reed and Al Horford, and critiques of Travis Hunter's impact on the Timberwolves. Amin quips, "There are some nights where if you didn't know any better, you'd assume Nasreed was the best player in NBA history." [04:34]

2. The Office Wedding Chronicles

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to humorous exchanges about office weddings, exploring the dynamics and awkwardness that often accompany them.

• Dan LeBatard on Danny GQ's Wedding: Dan shares his experience attending an office wedding, noting, "I think Danny GQ is a very nice guy... there were like two tables of co-workers." [05:48]

• Garter Belt vs. Bouquet Toss Debate: The hosts engage in a comedic debate over traditional wedding rituals. Greg Cody expresses his discomfort with the garter toss, sharing a personal anecdote: "I didn't do that in my way. I like... we're not doing that." [10:43]

• Humorous Interjections: John Zaslow and Billy Gil contribute to the lighthearted banter, discussing the awkwardness of participating in garter tosses and bouquet catches, further emphasizing the humorous side of office weddings.

3. NFL Draft Talk

The conversation pivots to the NFL draft, focusing on controversial picks and the implications of having multiple quarterbacks on the Cleveland Browns.

• Shedeur Sanders Predicament: Amin criticizes Cleveland Browns' strategy, saying, "The Browns have Kenny Pickett, Deshaun Watson, Shador Sanders and Dylan Gabriel, all for Joe Flacco to remind them who's who." [04:31]

• Coach Bickerstaff’s Leadership: There’s a critique of JB Bickerstaff’s leadership, with Amin asserting, "You can't spell JB Bickerstaff without bicker." [02:02], highlighting internal team conflicts.

• Draft Strategy Concerns: The discussion touches on the potential pitfalls of drafting multiple quarterbacks, questioning the Browns' future performance and stability.

4. Political Implications of Athlete's White House Visits

The hosts delve into the controversial topic of athletes visiting the White House, particularly focusing on Saquon Barkley's interactions with former President Donald Trump.

• Saquon Barkley’s White House Visit: Amin expresses concern over Barkley’s affiliations, stating, "I'm gonna go golf with Trump. He had like a tweet that was doubling and tripling down." [16:26]

• Impact on Public Perception: Mike Ryan emphasizes the blurred lines between sports and politics, remarking, "Sports is used to sanitize power and a presidency, I will just tell you that." [18:22]

• Historical Context: The conversation draws parallels to international events where sports figures have been used to improve political images, questioning the ethics and long-term consequences of such relationships.

5. Hypothetical Survival Scenario with Ron Magill

In a captivating segment, Ron Magill is invited to engage in a hypothetical survival challenge, where he must choose two allies from an assortment of animals and a hunter to survive an hour in a perilous arena.

• The Challenge: Dan poses the scenario: "You need to pick two to defend you and the others attack you. Which ones would you choose to survive an hour?" [29:54]

• Strategic Choices: Ron opts for the 10,000 rats and the man with the rifle, arguing their combined defensive capabilities: "I would go with the 10,000 rats. Man with the rifle." [31:31]

• Debate and Analysis: The hosts critically analyze Ron’s choices, questioning the practicality and effectiveness of his selections amidst the overwhelming number of adversaries. Amin challenges the sustainability of such a strategy, highlighting the chaos that would ensue: "If you're having animals to protect you, you're assuming that they are trainable." [36:19]

• Final Verdict: The segment underscores the complexities of hypothetical survival strategies, blending humor with strategic thinking as the hosts debate the merits and flaws of Ron's selections.

6. Closing Thoughts and Reflections

As the episode concludes, the hosts reflect on the diverse range of topics covered, from sports controversies and humorous office tales to the intricate interplay between athletics and politics, culminating in the thought-provoking survival scenario.

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Notable Quotes:

• “Nothing says Knicks Pistons playoffs like a 94, 93 rock fight.” – Amin Elhassan [02:02]

• “You can’t spell JB Bickerstaff without bicker.” – Amin Elhassan [02:02]

• “The H in Miami Heat stands for how embarrassing that 3% chance at Cooper flag.” – Amin Elhassan [02:55]

• “I think Danny GQ is a very nice guy... there were like two tables of co-workers.” – Dan LeBatard [05:48]

• “I'm gonna go golf with Trump. He had like a tweet that was doubling and tripling down.” – Amin Elhassan [16:26]

• “You need to pick two to defend you and the others attack you. Which ones would you choose to survive an hour?” – Dan LeBatard [29:54]

• “I would go with the 10,000 rats. Man with the rifle.” – Ron Magill [31:31]

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Conclusion

This episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz offers a rich tapestry of discussions that encapsulate the intersection of sports, culture, humor, and politics. The engaging banter among the hosts, coupled with insightful critiques and entertaining hypotheticals, provides listeners with both laughter and thoughtful commentary. Whether dissecting the intricacies of an NBA playoff brawl or navigating the awkwardness of office weddings, the show delivers content that is both relatable and intellectually stimulating.

Transcript

[Dan LeBatard]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats podcast.

[Stugatz]

It is time for Stugats to share his game notes.

[Amin Elhassan]

No one in the media will tell.

[Dan LeBatard]

You what happened better than my boy Stu.

[Mike Ryan]

Dan, wait a minute. We're going to do this to Amin again where we're putting him in the bad spot of Andrew Santino is watching and he has to do his weekend observations.

[Amin Elhassan]

Is Andrew Santino watching right now at home?

[Mike Ryan]

Perhaps. Because this is live and we're putting you in the position to perform Stugatz's bit.

[Greg Cody]

I want to give a little look behind the scenes here. Last week, Santino came on with us, did great improv. He was so good at improv, he actually didn't even hear, but he could just see what was going on. And then we went to him as if he heard and he made it seem like, I'm telling you, I got. Lewis told me after that interview he didn't even hear weekend observations, but he was still so good on his feet that he able none of us noticed.

[Amin Elhassan]

He is the yes. And King and I tried to do yes and the next day and everyone stared at me like, what do you mean? Like an elephant. Like it was the worst improv ever. And I felt so ashamed.

[Dan LeBatard]

He's like someone that watches, right? Andrew Santino?

[Amin Elhassan]

Yeah.

[Billy Gil]

Yep.

[Amin Elhassan]

He does. He's a sports guy. He does like sports. Bobby, not so much, but Santino. Yes. All right, Dan. Weekend observations presented by Miller Lite. Dan, this league was made for these moments. Tim Hardaway getting hit on the arm, Luka Doncic getting tripped and referees swallowing their whistle in the biggest moments, only to then come out after the game in the two minute report to say, whoops, our bad. And Dan, just like that. Make no mistake about it, the NBA games getting ruined by officiating are back.

[Mike Ryan]

It is crazy. We've already had a couple of our bad at the end of the game. The whole series was decided by our bad.

[Amin Elhassan]

Nothing says Knicks Pistons playoffs like a 94, 93 rock fight. JB Bickerstaff leads the league in bickering. You can't spell JB Bickerstaff without bicker.

[Mike Ryan]

That's true.

[John Zaslow]

Does no one else think it's weird that a coach for another team, in this case Chauncey Billups, would sitting front row cheering for a team he doesn't coach?

[Amin Elhassan]

That's a good point. Good observation.

[Mike Ryan]

Also a good observation by you that Bickerstaff begins with bicker.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yep. The Pistons wanting a physical game only to then complain about not getting foul Calls. You know what they say. You can't have your cake and eat it too. Or the Stugats is strong in the Pistons. Either or. I did not think we would see a more pathetic game than game one of OKC Memphis. But congratulations, Miami Heat, you did it. The H in Miami Heat stands for how embarrassing that 3% chance at Cooper flag.

[Mike Ryan]

Yep.

[Amin Elhassan]

Doesn't sound too bad right now.

[Mike Ryan]

That's right.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yeah. Jeremy. Talk about the Heat. Lipstick on a pig. Talahero saying we're not going down. 4 0. Hey, Tyler, think again. And while you're at it, Enjoy Cancun. Big Five 0 run by Miami to close the game, though, to keep him under 60.

[Mike Ryan]

Do we have that Whittingham? Do we have the Whittingham betting slip that we were promising from earlier? Because it is hard to find this live bet he made on the Miami Heat plus 57 and a half.

[Billy Gil]

They say good teams win plus juice.

[Greg Cody]

You can get that at.

[Billy Gil]

I told him, frame that.

[Mike Ryan]

That is a work of art right there.

[Billy Gil]

Can we fax that to the Heat front office? Just fax it. I want old wax paper being faxed of that betting slip.

[Amin Elhassan]

Hey, Mike. Nobody beats the heat by 60 on their home court in the playoffs. Nobody. Culture for anybody who thinks going in the fifth round will humble Shadur Sanders must not know who Shedeur Sanders is. I don't know what's worse for Shadur Sanders falling in the draft or still somehow ending up on the Browns. Cleveland Browns drafting two quarterbacks. You know what they say, if you draft two quarterbacks, you drafted none. The Browns have Kenny Pickett, Deshaun Watson, Shador Sanders and Dylan Gabriel, all for Joe Flacco to remind them who's who. Joe cool. Blue Jays pitcher Kevin Gosman getting ejected and then tripping down the stairs. Insult to injury. Why doesn't that happen more often?

[Greg Cody]

I guess people do trip downstairs.

[Amin Elhassan]

Dan, you know what Nas Reed does for the Timberwolves?

[Mike Ryan]

Hits big threes.

[Amin Elhassan]

He does it all. There are some nights where if you didn't know any better, you'd assume Nasreed was the best player in NBA history. Nasreed or Al Horford? Shot for your life.

[Mike Ryan]

I saw Al Horford the other day dive into the stands for no good reason, just to do it at 37.

[John Zaslow]

Mike, why was there a Nas Reed banner hanging at Wrestlemania? You saw that, right?

[Mike Ryan]

Because he's Nas Reed. He deserves it. He's great.

[Billy Gil]

I know you think that that's where this Venn diagram meets, but I actually.

[Amin Elhassan]

Don'T follow basketball Zaz, I'll tell you why. Because there are some nights where if you didn't know any better, you'd assume Nasreed was the best player in NBA history.

[Billy Gil]

Every time I do watch the T Wolves secretly, like, he's a good player, right? He's really good. He's so good.

[Amin Elhassan]

He's young Al Horford.

[Billy Gil]

He's impactful.

[Amin Elhassan]

He's young Al Horford, I'm telling you. Let's see. Travis Hunter, the rare first round pick that feels like your team is getting two first round picks. Congratulations to our engineer, Daniel Gonzalez Quevedo. That's his name. Danny gq on his wedding this past weekend. Danny gq.

[Mike Ryan]

Everybody calls him gq. We had an office wedding around here. Billy, do you have any opinions on office weddings? How do you feel about this?

[Dan LeBatard]

How do I feel about office weddings? I think Danny GQ is a very nice guy. And he did a thing where he put his save to date on the fridge and he said, if anyone wants to come, let me know. And I think that it was a nice gesture. And then about 40 people from the office showed up. And I don't think that that's what the intention was. I think I felt bad because I saw everybody bonding and having a good time. And he's such a nice guy. He's like, yeah, of course I want everyone to go, but I've had a wedding. I know it's pricey and from what I hear was two tables of co workers.

[Amin Elhassan]

No way.

[Dan LeBatard]

That's a lot.

[Amin Elhassan]

That's too much.

[Dan LeBatard]

That's. That's a lot of people. Sometimes you just say, you know what? I love you. I hope you have a magical day. I know you don't actually want me there. It's just an added expense. I hope everyone has a great time.

[Amin Elhassan]

Billy, you know what they say, when you have two tables of co workers, you don't have any.

[Mike Ryan]

That was supportive, though. That was loving. A loving gesture to celebrate love.

[Amin Elhassan]

I love love.

[Dan LeBatard]

I mean, but also, like with this crew, they'll go anywhere there's an open bar.

[Amin Elhassan]

Look at that. Dangerous nights crew.

[Dan LeBatard]

I think if. I think with this crew, if you said, guys, end of times, you're going to hell with art brials. But there's an open bar. Half of them would sign up for it. An eternity in hell with an open bar.

[Mike Ryan]

They'd sign up, not make an open invitation to people in this office and not expect to get really hurt on the bill is what you're saying.

[Dan LeBatard]

Well, I mean, it's an open bar. You pay for it on the front end. Yeah, you know, you know, to pay for plate and then plus one situation. But it's not like they didn't bring gifts to table.

[Amin Elhassan]

The gifts.

[Dan LeBatard]

The gifts game is always a situation where, like, you start doing a thing where, like, I know what this costs. And, you know, plus minus here on the value of this, you know, George Foreman Grill. I can get this for like, $79. It cost me 200 to feed you and your plus one here. I don't know that we're breaking even, Jack.

[Amin Elhassan]

RIP George Foreman.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, man. So this is a Sad 1.

[Amin Elhassan]

To GQ on behalf of Dan Blank. Check. On behalf of me. You're welcome. In honor of GQ's wedding, top five athletes and entertainers who connote a wedding. Oli, Darius Garland. Oli Usher. Oli Chapel. Roan number five, Derek Favors.

[Mike Ryan]

What did I miss on Darius Garland? Is it garland something? It's a. What is a garland? I'm. Forgive me. I don't know what a garland is.

[John Zaslow]

Maybe it's a Darius.

[Dan LeBatard]

Was it a Darius thing?

[Mike Ryan]

What is the joke?

[Greg Cody]

Is it what they call the thing? Garland is a wreath of flowers and leaves worn on the head or hung as a decoration.

[John Zaslow]

What's a Darius?

[Amin Elhassan]

I love. Love.

[Dan LeBatard]

That's a good question.

[Billy Gil]

Austin Centric. Got one of those.

[Dan LeBatard]

What's the thing? What's the thing that's around, like your.

[Amin Elhassan]

The.

[Dan LeBatard]

The thigh? Oh, garter belt. Yes. It's not Darius garter belt.

[Amin Elhassan]

No. It's close, though.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, you're not talking about a garter belt. You're talking about the thing that's tossed.

[Dan LeBatard]

No, that's a bouquet. That's Darius bouquet.

[Billy Gil]

But you also toss a garter belt.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yes, you do.

[Dan LeBatard]

I had a teacher, Ed Garland.

[Mike Ryan]

That's interesting.

[Dan LeBatard]

He's a harness racer.

[Amin Elhassan]

No.

[Mike Ryan]

Thank you. More information. The tale now on spools and we.

[Billy Gil]

Really get to enjoy the tapestry layers of an onion.

[Mike Ryan]

Yes. Just crazy where that story ended.

[Greg Cody]

I've always tried to avoid catching the thing at a wedding because I don't want the uncomfortable. Like, now you're doing a thing with some woman you barely know, where you're, like, reaching up her leg just like.

[Mike Ryan]

That's Greg Cody's humor to just have a name and say, I had a teacher who had that name and go off wandering, popping apart.

[Dan LeBatard]

Greg also harnessed racer one time.

[Mike Ryan]

You can't save her. You can't save that. You had a teacher named Ed Garland, and it contributed nothing to the conversation. In fact, while I'm at it, Minor.

[Dan LeBatard]

Penalty, two minutes for adding nothing.

[Mike Ryan]

I had a teacher named Ed Garland. Useless. I don't care.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm giving you on it more. Not getting more about.

[Greg Cody]

He was a harness racer. What is that I'm not telling you about popping apart.

[Dan LeBatard]

Not going to get it.

[Amin Elhassan]

Dan, I think you kind of steamrolled something else that happened where Chris said, I've never liked the garter belt thing. I don't want to reach up on a strange woman.

[Greg Cody]

I don't like this thing at weddings.

[John Zaslow]

I don't like it either, Chris.

[Greg Cody]

No, it's not. It's whoever catches the bouquet and the person who catches the thing that the guy throws. Then all of a sudden you're like, you guys, have you ever been to a wedding before? I have not had this experience at a wedding. Someone else's life on the thing.

[John Zaslow]

No, that's not true.

[Billy Gil]

The way he initially described it is that the strange woman is his wife. It's not a strange woman that you're.

[John Zaslow]

Yeah, you're wrong. The wife sits down and the, The.

[Amin Elhassan]

The.

[John Zaslow]

The groom then gets the car.

[Amin Elhassan]

No.

[Greg Cody]

Then there's the extra stuff with the bridesmaids and the like. No, the bouquet is like, if you catch that, you're the next to get married.

[Amin Elhassan]

No.

[Greg Cody]

And then. And then the lady.

[Amin Elhassan]

The.

[Greg Cody]

Then the guy flicks something. There's like a man catching something. And then.

[John Zaslow]

Have you ever been to a wedding?

[Billy Gil]

How is this worse on Eddie Garner?

[Amin Elhassan]

No.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm. No, no, I'm not going to. I'm not going to leave Chris alone on this. I believe that he's right, that these are two different things. There's the throwing of the bouquet over the shoulder, and that's the next alleged bridesmaid that will get married.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yes.

[Mike Ryan]

And then there is also something with the garter and the garter being thrown.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yes.

[Greg Cody]

Just been at weddings where all of a sud, like, a random guy at the wedding is, like, crawling up the floor of, like, one of the bridesmaids who caught the bouquet.

[John Zaslow]

I mean, maybe that's a wedding in prison.

[Billy Gil]

I mean, that. I guess that's a dealer's choice. But just to be clear, the strange woman whose leg you were creeping up on to get the garden, that was your wife?

[John Zaslow]

Yeah, man.

[Greg Cody]

I didn't do that in my way. I like. As I said, I don't like that at my wedding. I'm like, we're not doing that.

[Billy Gil]

You did a little slingshot motion. Like you've done it before.

[Mike Ryan]

It seemed like you slingshoted some garter.

[Greg Cody]

Actually, you know, What? Now that I think back, I think they did the thing where I was blindfolded it and then they replaced my wife with like my. One of my.

[Amin Elhassan]

They pranked.

[Greg Cody]

All of a sudden I like, grabbed you. My buddy's leg and I'm like, this is not my wife's leg.

[Billy Gil]

All right, so that is a very personal story.

[Amin Elhassan]

Number four.

[John Zaslow]

Just this hairy leg he's peeling up to get.

[Billy Gil]

That's actually a good gag. Good gag.

[John Zaslow]

This doesn't happen at everyone.

[Amin Elhassan]

Somebody.

[Mike Ryan]

Somebody looks like DJ Khaled.

[Amin Elhassan]

Number four, Franco Harris. The Immaculate Reception. Number three, Jonas. I do. Number two, Jonah Bride. Number one, Michael Jordan.

[Mike Ryan]

Love would make an appearance here somewhere.

[Amin Elhassan]

Rings?

[Mike Ryan]

Anybody?

[Greg Cody]

Former Marlon Jonah Bright, huh?

[Amin Elhassan]

Yeah. I'm digging deep today. Hey, don't look now. Here come the Rays. If the NFL draft was based on names and names alone, a quarterback named Jackson Dart would go first overall every time.

[Mike Ryan]

That's correct.

[Amin Elhassan]

Sean Payton telling NFL teams they should beware of snubbing Shedeur Sanders while also not drafting Shedeur Sanders. Sean Payton, the stugats is strong in you. How long do you think before Shador Sanders can recite all 143 players drafted before him? He's got to have it down by now, right? No, no, no.

[Mike Ryan]

That's a lot. 143 is too many to memorize in just a couple of days.

[Amin Elhassan]

I don't know, man. What is it? What else has he been doing?

[Mike Ryan]

143 is too many. Put it on the poll juju at Lebatard show. Could you memorize 143 names in two days?

[Amin Elhassan]

Dan? That didn't sound right. Let me do it again. Dan, do you know what this Clippers Nugget series has?

[Mike Ryan]

It has everything.

[Amin Elhassan]

A little bit of everything.

[Mike Ryan]

A little bit of everything.

[Amin Elhassan]

Good job. The last time the Pistons won a home playoff game, I was a video coordinator, George W. Bush was president and Apple hadn't opened the App Store yet. K. NFL draft picks. Can we stop trying to wear retired jersey numbers? They're retired. Get over it. Pick a new number and build your own legacy. You know about that?

[Mike Ryan]

That's right.

[John Zaslow]

Good on LT for telling him to F off.

[Amin Elhassan]

No, he didn't. No, he didn't. He told him to F off.

[Mike Ryan]

He told him to F off.

[Amin Elhassan]

What did he tell him?

[Mike Ryan]

He just told him no. But he said, I'll be back behind you every two steps. I'll be two steps behind you every step of the way.

[Billy Gil]

How do we feel about the Warren Moon Cam Ward thing? They brought Warren Moon out to Hand it over. Which I guess is a nice touch and also a bit of context. Warren Moon never played in Tennessee.

[John Zaslow]

Yeah, I thought that was weird.

[Amin Elhassan]

An oiler.

[Greg Cody]

Huge update for Chris, apparently. According to Masterclass.com, which is teaching about the garter toss sometimes, indeed, the groomsman who catches the garter will place it on the bridesmaid who caught the bouquet. That's the next step, guys. I've seen that happen before sometimes.

[Amin Elhassan]

Back off.

[Greg Cody]

Never seen it.

[Billy Gil]

But that's good.

[Greg Cody]

But apparently it's a thing that's good.

[Billy Gil]

If you're single and horny.

[Greg Cody]

That's why I always feel uncomfortable by it.

[Billy Gil]

It depends on who.

[Greg Cody]

Remember, I started by saying, I don't like that. Well, that's like, all of a sudden you're. I'm like, I don't. I don't know this woman. Respectful. And because she caught the bouquet, I'm now like, my wife's over. Sorry, honey, I'm going to go climb up a feminist dress and.

[Billy Gil]

But that's why it's optional. See, like, I once caught the garter belt when I was 8 years old.

[Mike Ryan]

Like, oh, that's uncomfortable.

[Billy Gil]

You don't. You leave it as an optional thing.

[Amin Elhassan]

Hey, Cleveland Browns hard knocks collision course. There's nothing more insulting in sports than calling the last pick of the draft Mr. Irrelevant. Brock Purdy. When Todd McShay talks NFL draft, you know what you do, Dan? You listen. I felt bad for Dylan Gabriel. It wasn't until he got picked that everyone finally went, what the hell is going on? Speaking of hell, Art Briles. Dan, those are the weekend observations.

[Mike Ryan]

Excellent work, Amin. Diana was right on the George Kittle contract. He assigned an extension for 40 million guaranteed. Diana Rossini's information is as good anybody's. I wanted to ask the group here. Jalen Hurts sat out the White House, but Saquon went to the White House at a side picking time. People can talk about unity, talk about sports. Saquon Barkley making a decision. And during a very popular time for Saquon Barkley to go to a White House that has been dividing the country. What are you looking at me like that?

[Amin Elhassan]

I don't think it's the White House visit so much as the hell, yeah, I'm gonna go golf with Trump. He had like a tweet that was doubling and tripling down.

[Dan LeBatard]

He did more than the White House. He, like, hung out with him the day before. I think they started a round of golf. He flew on Marine One with him, and then they had the White House the next day and they had lunch, there was photos together. So people were not happy with the level of palling around he seemed to be doing right.

[Amin Elhassan]

I think the White House visit, for the most part, I know people have on different types of history, skipped it because of political differences. But for the most part, I think people are accepting, hey, when you win a championship, the tradition is you go, you go to the White House, you meet the president, take your picture, whatever.

[John Zaslow]

But also no one says we're going to meet the president. They say we're going to the White House.

[Amin Elhassan]

The White House, yeah. It's the extracurricular itinerary around the White House trip that I think everyone's going nuts about. And the tweet that we have on the screen right now where he's doubling and tripling down on it.

[Mike Ryan]

And I would just tell people who tire of politics with their sports that what is happening presently in this country as you get offenses after offenses, that it's just reporting that the Patriots plane is deporting people and we're arresting immigration judges and we're doing stuff that when sports is used to sanitize power and a presidency, I will just tell you that that is something that my grandparents and my parents talked about from Cuban times on how it is that freedom gets threatened by propaganda, misinformation and somebody who doesn't know he's being used as a tool because he's a Super bowl champion. Being used as a tool without realizing he's being used as a tool. When the White House sends out the pictures to sanitize what is a laundering of freedom. That no should be okay with Dan.

[Amin Elhassan]

It's not unlike the whole Saudi Arabia live golf thing or Cutter with the World cup where everyone was clutching pearls like how can we allow them to use sports to kind of sanitize their image? And I'm like, what do you think they learned it from?

[Mike Ryan]

It's the same thing. They learned it from here. But that's been normalized and now this will be normalized. As we talk third terms on a presidency like you're. I think it's clear to all that if in sports you make some choices to hobnob with this particular power, you are selling a piece of your sport.

[Amin Elhassan]

Can I throw this out there, by the way, as we speak about third term presidencies, I feel like the Republicans are opening a box they don't wanna open. Cuz who was the main guy who was like, oh, I wish I could have voted for him a third time you open that third term, Guess What? Now all of a sudden the Democrats don't have a leadership issue they don't have. Oh, who's our guy? Barry, come back in, puts on the cape, saves America again.

[Billy Gil]

Oh, no. It'll be tied to the 2020 election. See, look, that wasn't like they'll open the door for Don, but close the door on Barry real quick. Hey, you in the audience, it's Mike. You've been a fan of this show, hopefully for a long time. And you know how much Miller Lite means to me. This partnership, it's real. It's documented. For almost 20 years, Miller Lite has been a partner of the Dan Levittard show with Stugatz. And now Miller Lite is celebrating its 50th anniversary. I've had so many great moments with Miller Lite, so many great activations, so many great events presented by Miller Lite. A great partner. Cheers to them. Cheers to 50 incredible years. And for you at home, you know that Miller Time always means a good time. From game night to parties with friends or a special anniversary, celebrating important occasions means more moments for the coolest people in your life. Cheers to 50 years of Miller Light, the great tasting light beer. For people who Love beer since 1975, now's a perfect time to celebrate legendary stories with friends, family and a great tasting light be beer. It's Miller time. Miller Lite Great Taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Game time is the official ticketing partner of the Dan LeBatard show with Stu Gotz. I am Mike Ryan and as you know on this show I am often touting game time because I believe in this product. And as a play in Tournament begins this week, why don't you head on over to Game Time? As a Miami Heat fan, I've got plenty of great experiences with that play in tournament. A lot of good runs started in this play in tournament. Might be a little frustrated that they're always in the play in tournament, but that's a story for another day. The good news is Game time makes getting tickets to that play in tournament faster and easier even for hard to get playoff seeds. Prices on the game time map may actually go down the closer it gets to tip off with killer last minute deals, all in prices, views from your seat and their lowest price guarantee. Gametime takes the guesswork out of buying NBA playoff tickets. And don't forget about that all in pricing toggling. This feature shows the total up front with no surprise fees at checkout. And GameTime's got its unparalleled ticket coverage. Your purchase is covered with the most flexible customer service policy in the ticketing industry. Take the guesswork out of buying tickets with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account and use code DAN for $20 off your first purchase terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code dan for $20 off. Download the Gametime app today. Last minute tickets, Lowest price guaranteed. Hey, folks, it's Mike Ryan. And if you're watching our show, you probably know and your boy has undergone a little bit of a body transformation. And I gotta tell you, Peloton has helped me on my fitness journey. It got the ball rolling for me because I watched my wife on the Peloton. She takes all these great classes. She has her favorite instructors. I listen to the music, I'm a big music guy. Gets me fired up. Makes me want to take part in this fitness phenomenon known as Peloton. Peloton offers a variety of challenging classes from four week strength building classes to running, cycling and everything in between. Peloton will help you achieve your goals and maybe you'll have some fun along the way. I know I have. It's backed by thousands of members whose lives have been changed. Be part of that group, telling you I'm better for it. Have it in my office. Sometimes I can put on the baseball game. Sometimes I can put on a soccer match. Some other times I'm totally locked in on an emo playlist. Find your push, find your power with [e-mail] Don Libertard, John Zaslo, how you love that catchphrase. Bad news for opposing teams in the triple A stall.

[Mike Ryan]

Smiles till the bronze.

[Dan LeBatard]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats.

[Mike Ryan]

Ron McGill is joining us. Now. He has avoided politics. People here locally have tried to get him to do some things that he would obviously win, but he does not want in this dirty game. So we'll just talk about with the animals, with him and the conversation that the Internet has been having the last few days. Ron, we've been having a form of a gorilla with you for many years.

[Billy Gil]

We need to make a correction. This patriot story is from 2022. That's a different administration.

[Mike Ryan]

Okay, my bad.

[Billy Gil]

Separating the Internet.

[Mike Ryan]

Okay, my bad.

[Amin Elhassan]

That's a Fine, right?

[Mike Ryan]

Yes. That's gotta be a big fine. Obviously. Yes. I hadn't seen that story.

[Billy Gil]

Thank you, Billy, for doing the research on that.

[Mike Ryan]

Yes, thank you, Billy. Can I ask you, Ron, have a lot of people been asking you about that 100 people versus a gorilla?

[Stugatz]

Yeah, I just did an interview with Rolling Stone magazine about it. Excuse me.

[Mike Ryan]

Wow. Okay. Well, wait a minute. I just asked him, though, is that fair to do to him?

[Amin Elhassan]

Yes, it. Because we asked him, have a lot of people been asking about that? He could have just said, yeah, a lot of people. I just did an interview. But he said, I did an interview with Rolling Stone magazine. Ever heard of it?

[Mike Ryan]

Is that what he did?

[Amin Elhassan]

That's what he did, yeah.

[John Zaslow]

I mean, you didn't say, have you talked to anybody else but us about it?

[Amin Elhassan]

So, Yeah, I don't know. We didn't need to know. Is a Rolling Stone magazine, Ron.

[Mike Ryan]

I feel like I could predict, though, that humans always overestimate their ability against animals, correct?

[Stugatz]

Yes and no. I mean, you know, the answer I gave them was one that I think a lot of people didn't believe. I said, yeah, if you got 100 men in their 20s in good shape that are unified and willing to sacrifice a few, they're going to win.

[John Zaslow]

Okay, so can you explain to me, though, is it 100 men at once.

[Greg Cody]

That we're talking about?

[Stugatz]

However. However, you got to be 100 men at once. Yes.

[John Zaslow]

I mean, 100, that's got to be.

[Stugatz]

100 men at one.

[Amin Elhassan]

I think the thing is what you said, Ron, which is willingness, sacrifice, because the reality is 100 men at once, the first two or three, they're getting torn apart in the most graphic way. You're telling me the other 97 are like, no, let's keep going. No, you see, you see a man's head get ripped off, you're like, ah, maybe not.

[Stugatz]

I made it very clear in my interview. Listen, you've got to be able to go in there and realize the first few guys are basically on a kamikaze mission. Okay, they're on a kamikaze mission. But understanding that if you're willing, if this is your goal, if you're fighting for the greater good, even though a gorilla is a gentle giant, is a vegetarian, and would never be in this predicament, and would run away from 100 men if he saw it coming at him. But people want to insist, but what if he could run away and you had this fight and who's going to win this fight? Well, okay, at the end of the day 100 men are going to survive. The gorilla is not. Now, some of those hundred men, there's going to be collateral damage. Okay? There's going to be bites and arterial bleeding. There's going to be broken ne. There's going to be suffocation. There's going to be, you know, just, you know, horrible concussions that are going to lead to fatal brain bleeds. So there's going to be death there. But at the end of the day, if all the men realize, okay, we're going to sacrifice, they're going to end up at least asphyxiating the gorilla. If they just all pile around him like a big, huge straightjacket, restrict his ability to open his arms, to extend his arms and go at gut punches, real good abdominal, you know, trauma. That gorilla is going to end up not surviving.

[Amin Elhassan]

Ron, how many. How many men would die?

[Stugatz]

I would say probably 10 to 15 are going to lose it.

[Mike Ryan]

And why do you think the other 85 are going to keep going? Like, I want you to sort of measure the strength that we're talking about here and how violent all of this would be, because I don't know how this works as a coordinated effort. 100 people getting there is like 50 people getting there. It doesn't make much of a difference. He's going to tear through a lot of people.

[Stugatz]

Not. Not to a lot. He's going to tear through a few. He's going to tear through a few. Don't get me wrong. He's going to tear through a few. But at the end of the day, 100 men. Now, if you told me 20 men, I'd say, no, the guerrilla is going to take them.

[Greg Cody]

What's the number?

[Stugatz]

You know, I'm saying the number is probably going to be closer to 50.

[Amin Elhassan]

That's it, guys. 50 guys.

[Stugatz]

Let's go be closer to 50. And this is men, you know, again, going in with this kamikaze attitude, saying, listen, some of us are going to die, but this is for the greater good. I made that very clear. Because in reality, like you're saying, Dan, you know, the first few guys get their freaking heads ripped off and bitten up through the skull. Those next guys are going, I'm out of here. I'm done. But if this. If they remain committed, they remain committed. They will try.

[John Zaslow]

Well, what are those 50 guys have to. What, Ron? What are those 50 guys have to look like? Like, they can't look like me. It's 50, Brock Lesnar, and it doesn't.

[Mike Ryan]

Make a difference if it's 50 MMA guys versus 50 of us.

[Amin Elhassan]

No, it makes a difference.

[Stugatz]

No, as long as you know, it can't be 50, 90 year olds, but, you know. Yeah, 50 guys. 50 guys in their 20s in reasonably.

[John Zaslow]

Good shape, 59 year olds would get ugly.

[Mike Ryan]

The gorilla doesn't have much stamina, does it?

[Stugatz]

No, it doesn't. That's the other thing. It's just going to become exhausted after a while. You basically exhaust the animal. And, you know, people keep thinking, yeah, it's got the bite, the head is. But the abdominal, the abdomen of that animal could, you know, you can give it some pretty traumatic injury that would lead to internal bleeding that could lead to its death. You know, the eyes, of course, are always susceptible to things and just the bottom line is asphyxiation. You get everybody on top of this gorilla where he can't breathe and he's fighting, he loses his breath, he'll pass out and he'll eventually die.

[Amin Elhassan]

Rope a dope.

[Dan LeBatard]

Ron, do you have a pen and a paper by you by any chance, or. No, I do. All right, great. Cause I have a hypothetical that one of my friends, a firefighter, Louis, asked me. So before you kind of just throw it off, cast it aside, remember, he's a first responder, so you're disrespecting first responders. All right, so, Ron, write this down. You or me, whoever it is, is stuck in an arena with the following. Okay? 50 hawks, 10 crocodiles, three brown bears, 15 wolves, a hunter with a rifle, seven buffalo, 10,000 rats, five gorillas and four lions. You need to pick two to defend you and the others attack you. Which ones would you choose to survive an hour?

[Amin Elhassan]

I like this.

[Mike Ryan]

Let's do it again. Just.

[Stugatz]

Okay, I got 50 hawks, 10 crocs, three bears, 15 wolves, man with a rifle, 10,000 rats, and five lions.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah. Did you put the buffaloes in there?

[Stugatz]

Oh, no.

[Dan LeBatard]

How many of those seven buffaloes? Also the three brown bears. I don't know if there's a difference between the brown bear and the black bear, but I know you told us one of them you say, hey, bear, and the other one, you can't do anything.

[Mike Ryan]

But the question is basically, do you take the man with the rifle?

[Dan LeBatard]

Well, you pick two to help you survive for an hour, but everyone else.

[Mike Ryan]

Is attacking, but you're worried about the rats. You're worried about the number of rats and the rifle.

[Dan LeBatard]

I would think this is also like Royal Rumble style too, right? Where they'll start taking each other out so you don't have to worry.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah, yeah, but 10,000 rats.

[Dan LeBatard]

But the rats, I mean, run.

[Mike Ryan]

Just going to run by or. Yeah, immediately attack. Hungry rats. Does it matter? Yeah.

[Dan LeBatard]

Would rat if you're in a room with 10,000 rats?

[Stugatz]

No, this is the same scenario as 100 Men and a Gorilla. I don't want to face 10,000 rats. Yeah, I can take out probably 100 of them, maybe 200 of them, but if they're coming at me like a freaking scene at a Willard and they're all biting and gnawing, I'm gonna die.

[Dan LeBatard]

But would they be.

[Amin Elhassan]

So that sounds like you're drafting the rats to protect you, right?

[Stugatz]

Yes, I'm drafting the rats to protect me.

[John Zaslow]

I want the rats too, on my team.

[Mike Ryan]

So the rats and the rifle is what you're taking and you're. And say bring all comers.

[Stugatz]

Yep.

[Dan LeBatard]

I mean, I don't know. I'm not a rifleman, Ron. Like, rifles are not automatic. You'd have to reload the rifle. And do you have unlimited ammo in that situation?

[Stugatz]

Oh, no, no, I'm going with an automatic rifle.

[Dan LeBatard]

No. Okay. All right, good.

[Mike Ryan]

I assume that we were taking a rif. Could shoot and would take out a number of animals.

[Dan LeBatard]

I think more so with a musket.

[Mike Ryan]

That had me with a bayonet then, is what you're giving me.

[Dan LeBatard]

No, no, that wasn't an option. No bayonets involved here. Yeah.

[Stugatz]

No, no, no. I would go with the 10,000 rats. Man with a rifle. My second option with the man with the right, without the man of the rifle would be five lions.

[Amin Elhassan]

Other than that, the wolves work together.

[Stugatz]

The wolves would be, you know, they're certainly a concern because they are very teamwork oriented.

[Amin Elhassan]

Right.

[Stugatz]

And can wear. And there are 15 of those, which makes a difference.

[John Zaslow]

But I'm not worried about the wolves.

[Stugatz]

Five lions. Five lions will take away 15 wolves.

[Dan LeBatard]

Who are the first to go, Ron. Because now I'm thinking with these large size animals like the rats, they could just step on them very easily by accident, not even realizing what they're doing.

[Stugatz]

That's true. But there's 10,000 of them building.

[Dan LeBatard]

But hawks also, hawks can go into the rafters if they want. Just flying by, they can hide out.

[Stugatz]

But hawks, hawks are going to inflict puncture wounds with their talons. That's it. They're not going to, it's not going to be the beak, it's the talons are going to hurt you. So, yeah, you're going to cut up, you might lose an eye, you're going to bleed a lot. They're not going to kill you.

[Mike Ryan]

What is the rifleman have to do though? He's got to take out the lions first and then the bears and now there are wolves on his arms.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah.

[Stugatz]

Also wait a, wait a minute, wait a minute. You're telling me that you got two things to defend you against everything else.

[Mike Ryan]

That's right. And the rats, the thing that you have a problem with here, the rats are running all over the place. They've left the wolves alone and now my rifleman is covered in buffalo.

[Stugatz]

If that's the case, if you're telling you, you're telling me I can just pick two to defend me against all the rest.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah.

[Stugatz]

It's not if but when you're going to die.

[Dan LeBatard]

No, but you have to survive only one hour. Who keeps you alive the longest?

[Mike Ryan]

Well, this is. So this is the question, Ron. See, what's happened here is I've sent my rats out and I think I'm okay, but I'm not okay because my rifleman, slow, he's old and he's only got eight of the animals. Now what am I doing with the rest if they're all hell bent on killing me?

[Stugatz]

Dan, you're bringing in a lot of other factors here.

[Mike Ryan]

You're bringing, in fact, I can't control the rats.

[Stugatz]

I'm assuming, I'm assuming everything we're talking about here is in its prime. Yeah, he's the best at what it does.

[Mike Ryan]

I can't control the rats though. The rats are not trainable. The rats are not attacking.

[Stugatz]

No, wait a minute. If, if you're having animals to protect you, you're assuming that they are trainable. For that matter, nothing, none of this thing. The guy with the rifle is going to say, hell, I'm out of here. I don't want to deal with all this. He's gonna run away.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'll tell you what, he can just.

[Amin Elhassan]

Turn to shoot you and they're like, we're done.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'll tell you what though, in the 10, there's gonna be a dud rat or two. In the 10,000 if we're gonna be.

[Stugatz]

Honest, but it's 10,000 dud rat or two. That still leaves 9,990.

[Mike Ryan]

Okay, 50 Hawks got nothing against 10,000 rats. It's just gonna be flying around.

[Stugatz]

They have nothing.

[Amin Elhassan]

This is what.

[Stugatz]

Crocs are not fast enough. Crocs are not fast enough on land. Now we're doing this on land, I'm assuming, right. I'm not doing this in the water.

[Dan LeBatard]

No, you're in an arena? Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

We're on land. But are crocs gonna chase me around? Don't I have to just run around in circles and they'll stop chasing me because they can't do that.

[Stugatz]

Yeah, well, no, no, no. That zigzag stuff is another myth. No, no, no. But they're not gonna. You're gonna be able to get away from crocs on land. That's not. That's not.

[Mike Ryan]

How do I get away from a crocodile? How do I do that? You're saying if I zigzag, it doesn't work?

[Greg Cody]

I'm telling you right now, you say it's a myth. I'm zigzagging. If I'm getting chased by one of those or running.

[Stugatz]

Or running in circles, and you may. And you may get nailed then, Chris, because when you're zigzagging, instead of going. The croc is going in a straight line. It's going to catch you as you're zagging.

[Dan LeBatard]

I could juke out a croc.

[Mike Ryan]

So it's not. It's not zigzagging. A crocodile can't actually chase us down very well, can it? If we're not running in a straight line.

[Stugatz]

Yeah, yeah. If you're. No, if you're running in a straight line, even then, it's. It's. It's. It's. You're not going to get chased down by a crocodile. You'll be able to outrun the crocodile in a short spurt. Okay, If a crocodile is. You walk up to a crocodile. Let's. Let's say 10ft away, and you surprise it in a short spurt, it can overcome. It can overtake you.

[Greg Cody]

But I'll run a mile fast.

[Dan LeBatard]

Like a mile.

[Greg Cody]

I'll run it fast.

[Stugatz]

I'm assuming that you're going to see these crocodiles from a further distance away. I mean, what's the size of the room you're in?

[Amin Elhassan]

It's an arena.

[Dan LeBatard]

It's an arena.

[Stugatz]

Yeah, it's an arena. So you got plenty of room to get away from. Crocodiles are the least of my concerns here.

[Amin Elhassan]

Okay, so. So, Ron, we took the rats. We took the guy with the rifle. What's the strategy? In my mind, the rifle guy takes out the hawks first. Right. Just.

[Stugatz]

The lions, man.

[Amin Elhassan]

Lions.

[Stugatz]

And got to go. Right after that, the bears.

[Dan LeBatard]

But what if the wolves break into three? There's 15 wolves, remember? What if they break it into three packs of five? They could take.

[Mike Ryan]

I've got wolves on my arms, on my rifleman. And now I've just got a bunch of rats defending me, and now I'm proper bleeped because I don't have a rifleman anymore.

[Dan LeBatard]

Is there any part of these animals that see one lone human being standing there and think, that's the least of my worries? And they just start attacking each other, and then you just kind of hang out in the corner and then all of a sudden, your last man standing in this royal rumble.

[John Zaslow]

I think the rats are going to dominate.

[Dan LeBatard]

I think they'll be bored just running around, not doing anything. I don't think they're just going to go into attack mode.

[Stugatz]

Right, listen, we've got to make. We've got to make this decision under the assumption that the animals know that their job is to defend or to attack.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yes.

[Stugatz]

Okay, so these rats are. They're trained rats that are going to defend you.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah.

[Stugatz]

With everything they've got.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yes. Because otherwise, like Ron said, then the guy with the rifle might just turn around and shoot you and be like, oh, yeah, we don't have any.

[Stugatz]

Exactly. I'm out of here.

[Dan LeBatard]

But the rats can't do anything.

[Amin Elhassan]

What?

[Dan LeBatard]

The hawks. The hawks are never going to go on the rats level. Hawks come and start attacking you while the rats are the ground game.

[Billy Gil]

Hawks can.

[Stugatz]

The hawks aren't going to kill you, Billy. They can't.

[Dan LeBatard]

No, they're trying to. These are trained hawks. Killer hawks. Yeah.

[Billy Gil]

Can I.

[Stugatz]

Can.

[Billy Gil]

Can I replace one of the wolves with former Minnesota Timberwolf Kevin Garnett? No, I would take Pekovich.

[Amin Elhassan]

Oh, yeah. All right. He's in some hot water.

[Billy Gil]

Really?

[Amin Elhassan]

Yeah.

[Billy Gil]

I gotta Google that.

[Amin Elhassan]

Organized crime.

[Billy Gil]

Oh, really? Well, no, now I want him on my team. You don't want them against you.

[Mike Ryan]

Ron, good seeing you. Good talking to you. Thank you, sir.

[Stugatz]

Oh, God. Have a good day, guys.

[John Zaslow]

It's exhausting for us.

[Billy Gil]

Hey, you in the audience, it's Mike. You've been a fan of this show, hopefully for a long time. And you know how much Miller Lite means to me. This partnership. It's real. It's documented. For almost 20 years, Miller Lite has been a partner of the Dan LeBatard show with Stugots. And now Miller Lite is celebrating its 50th anniversary. I've had so many great moments with Miller Lite, so many great activations, so many great events presented by Miller Lite. A great partner. Cheers to them. Cheers to 50 incredible years. And for you at home, you know that Miller time always means a good time. From game night to parties with friends or a special anniversary celebrating important occasions means more moments for the coolest people in your life. Cheers to 50 years of Miller Light. The great Tasting like beer for people who Love beer since 1975, now's a perfect time to celebrate legendary stories with friends, family, and a great tasting life. Light beer. It's Miller Time. Miller Light Great taste 96 calories. Go to Millerlight. Com Dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.