Hour 1: Megapod with Calvin Johnson

Summary

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The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

Hour 1: Megapod with Calvin Johnson

Date: November 6, 2025
Location: The Elser Hotel, Downtown Miami
Hosts: Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, Mike Ryan, Jonathan Zaslow (“Zazz”), Mike Schmitz, Tony, Mad Dog

Episode Overview

This episode kicks off with the crew in lively, classic form, bouncing between nostalgic pop-culture references, hilarious tales from youth, debates over bad (and possibly brilliant) financial gifts, and a dive into TV nostalgia and NBA talk. There is a running theme of unpacking what’s truly valuable—whether that’s in gifts, broadcasting professionalism, or simple pleasures like channel surfing. The hosts’ rapport, comedic timing, and South Florida flavor shine through.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Bar Mitzvah Gifts: From Worst Ever to Actually Valuable?

[00:38–09:56]

• Mike Ryan launches with a bit about Curb Your Enthusiasm, specifically the “Danny Duberstein” episode, as a segue into a discussion on Jewish cultural rites and bar mitzvahs.
• Jonathan Zaslow tells a personal story about his mom recently finding old “terrible” bar mitzvah gifts—Israeli bonds and Disney stock—potentially now worth thousands after decades untouched.
  • The crew debates the (lack of) excitement for bonds as a gift, uniting around the sentiment that a bond or “a tree planted in Israel” is the “worst possible” present for a 13-year-old—but maybe not in retrospect.
  • Zaslow jokes about now being “rich” and plans to blow his windfall on premium WWE tickets.
  • The group riffs about logistics and etiquette of couples’ joint bank accounts and “shenanigans” money.
• Quote – Jonathan Zaslow [03:31]:
  “And the worst bar mitzvah gift that you could possibly get is a bond. James Bond’s worst.”
• Quote – Jonathan Zaslow [05:03]:
  “They're worth thousands of dollars, so how about that?”
• Tony tempers excitement by researching Israeli bonds, pointing out that most matured long ago and likely aren’t as valuable as Zaslow’s mom suspects—but Disney stock, given the splits, could be a legitimate windfall.

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2. Sports Broadcasting Ethics: Joe Davis and the Dodgers Debate

[13:46–17:32]

• Mad Dog passionately critiques Joe Davis (Dodgers and national broadcaster) for MCing the team’s championship celebration, arguing it crosses a line in objectivity. He’s especially fired up about how this would upset opposing fans.
• Quote – Mad Dog [14:18]:
  “If I'm a Blue Jay fan, I got Joe Davis shaking everybody's hand. Give me a break. ... He's the voice of the World Series. He's supposed to be right down the middle.”
• The crew weighs in, mostly disagreeing that it’s a problem since the practice is pretty standard in U.S. sports media (e.g., Mike Breen with the Knicks/ESPN). Zaslow admits not loving Davis’ final call but finds the outrage excessive.
• Quote – Mike Ryan [16:36]:
  “I never watched that and for one moment thought, oh, this guy wants the Dodgers to win.”
• Keen insight: The line between local pride and national neutrality in American sports media is not clear-cut; most fans don’t care about this “conflict” as much as old-school commentators do.

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3. Strange, Silly, and Insightful Games

[19:57–23:59]

• Mike Schmitz leads the panel in a “Real or Fake Podcast” guessing game.
  • Notable fake podcasts: “The Keith Bullock Show,” “Megapod with Calvin Johnson,” “Pugilist Specialist with Lennox Lewis,” “Clipboard Jesus with Charlie Whitehurst.”
  • Real podcast revealed: “Free Range with Von Miller.”
• Memorable exchange – Mike Ryan [23:00]:
  “Ah, that's a tough game. 3 for 5.”
• Observation: The game both pokes fun at athlete podcasts’ often-generic titles and highlights just how saturated the sports podcast market is.

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4. Longing for Channel Surfing: The Pluto TV Rabbit Hole

[24:05–38:17]

• The hosts wax nostalgic about the heyday of cable TV and the joy of stumbling onto beloved shows.
• Mike Ryan and Mike Schmitz give an enthusiastic pitch for Pluto TV, a free, ad-supported streaming service that replicates channel surfing with themed channels (e.g., 90s movies, Bar Rescue, I Love Lucy, James Bond, etc.).
• They go into detail on the experience:
  • Randomized episode order “restores the mystery” to TV watching.
  • Quote – Mike Ryan [27:43]:
    “It reintroduces that feeling of mystery. ... That's the thing that kids are missing.”
• Mike Ryan: “If they told me you're destitute... can't afford Netflix... you know what will keep me warm at night? Pluto TV.” [35:56]
• Mike Schmitz: “I honestly want to strip away all my other apps … movies flipping through … you need them to speak to you.” [34:46]
• Recurring joke: The group marvels at and mock-obsesses over obscure Pluto TV channels, from Bar Rescue to “Black Movies of the 80s.”
• Memorable moment: Mike lists a spontaneous channel guide rundown with reactions (“Oh, that's great! Hanging with Mr. Cooper!” [32:38]).

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5. NBA Deep Dive: Rockets, Grizzlies, and Roster Theories

[40:24–43:49]

• Tony launches an informed discussion on the Houston Rockets’ big lineup, considering whether their strategy—playing oversized guards/forwards—can really work through the full NBA season and playoffs. Amin Thompson is specifically discussed as the rookie point guard question mark.
• The guys debate the classic “do you need a veteran point guard to settle things down in crunch time?” question.
• The conversation moves to the Memphis Grizzlies and their strange roster dynamics with Ja Morant and Jaren Jackson, including Morant’s tense relationship with his coach and media scrutiny.
• Quote – Tony [41:13]:
  “Either they're going to be the biggest team and just maul everybody, or they're going to get to a point where in the half court, it's going to be like, oh, shit, KD, here's the ball. Try and do something.”
• Quote – Mike Ryan [41:25]:
  “That's their small lineup... So there is some jitters there. But I hear what you're saying is like, you need that kind of old head. Fred Van Vliet, Mike Conley, these guys are just like, everyone settle down.”

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6. Classic Le Batard Humor and Tangents

• Throughout, the show is colored by offbeat bits and snappy exchanges:
  • Mike Schmitz and Zazzle riffing on not knowing James Bond or Disney stock details, repeated “Adele!” guesses for every Bond theme [33:14, 33:35].
  • Several tangent jokes about freebasing, Pulp Fiction adrenaline shots, and “trainspotting” [39:05–40:14].
  • Quick asides about relationships, money, and life via the shenanigans of Zazzle wanting a John Cena ticket splurge.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• “And the worst bar mitzvah gift that you could possibly get is a bond. James Bond’s worst.”
  — Jonathan Zaslow [03:31]
• “They're worth thousands of dollars, so how about that?”
  — Jonathan Zaslow [05:03]
• “If I'm a Blue Jay fan, I got Joe Davis shaking everybody's hand. Give me a break.”
  — Mad Dog [14:18]
• “It reintroduces that feeling of mystery. ... That's the thing that kids are missing.”
  — Mike Ryan [27:43]
• “If they told me you're destitute... can't afford Netflix... you know what will keep me warm at night? Pluto TV.”
  — Mike Ryan [35:56]
• “Either they're going to be the biggest team and just maul everybody, or they're going to get to a point where in the half court, it's going to be like, oh, shit, KD, here's the ball. Try and do something.”
  — Tony [41:13]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:38] – [09:56]: Zaslow’s bar mitzvah story, financial gifts debate, and joint account shenanigans
• [13:46] – [17:32]: Mad Dog’s rant on Joe Davis, sports broadcasting objectivity
• [19:57] – [23:59]: "Real or Fake Podcast" game segment
• [24:05] – [38:17]: Pluto TV, channel surfing nostalgia, detailed channel listing tangent
• [40:24] – [43:49]: Houston Rockets, Memphis Grizzlies, and NBA team-building debate

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Episode Tone & Style

True to The Dan Le Batard Show’s trademark irreverence, this episode is fast-paced, goofy, and a blend of both sports and pure entertainment/personal banter. The tone is loose, often self-deprecating, and safely self-aware, always landing back at the core of communal fun and gentle ribbing.

For listeners who missed it, this hour provides a snapshot of everything the show does best: stories rooted in genuine cultural experience, arguments over what really matters (in life, sports, or television), and the kind of freewheeling banter that makes the hosts feel like your own group of hilarious friends.

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Transcript

[Dan Le Batard]

This episode is brought to you by Disney. This Thanksgiving, Judy Hopps and Nick Wilde are back on the big screen. So grab your family and friends as Disney invites you to return to Zootopia for the fur nominal movie event of the holiday season. See all your favorite Zootopia characters, plus new favorites in the most paw eomet movie of the year. Don't miss Disney Zootopia 2 when it hits theaters everywhere November 26th. Get your tickets now. This is the Dan Levator show with the Stugats podcast.

[Mike Ryan]

So, as a lot of people know, I'm a big fan of Curb youb Enthusiasm. One of my favorite episodes of all time is. One of my favorite seasons is when they're trying to do the Seinfeld finale. Finale, right the way it should have been done. But my favorite episode that season is when Michael Richards is suffering from this disease and he's really worried, and he doesn't wanna do the show because he's worried about his health. And Larry David says, no, my boy Danny Duberstein had it, and he's fine. And so Michael Richards says, can you put me in touch with him? And Larry says, sure. And he goes to Jeff and he says, jeff, give me Danny Duberstein's number. I gotta give it to Michael Richards. And Jeff's like, danny Duberstein's dead. When did he die? Like, two years ago. How did he die? He died of that disease that Kramer has. Like, it's a really serious disease. So Larry now realizes he can't tell Michael Richards Kramer this. So he gets Leon to dress up as Danny Duberstein to go tell him everything's gonna be okay. And Michael Richards says, your name's Danny Duberstein?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

He's like, you're Jewish. You've been bar mitzvahs. He's like, three times. I thought it only happened once. Oh, no. Sometimes you gotta re up the mitzvah. I bring all this up because Zazzle turned to me and says, you know, I got some bar mitzvah gifts.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I got a bar mitzvah story for you. You're not gonna. Well, maybe you won't believe this. I. I'll let you decide. I can't pick a future. So my mother sends me a message yesterday, all right? She texts me and she tells me, jonathan, can we, you know, can I come over this weekend? You know, maybe we could do dinner at the house. I was going through a bunch of my stuff recently, and I found some very. She. She capitalized very. Some very interesting stuff you may be interested In.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, no, I don't want to hear that from my mom.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Now. I don't know how she thinks that I'm going to wait until Sunday to find out this very interesting thing that she's found. So I said, of course, yeah, you can come over this weekend. But what did you find? All right, so when you're bar mitzvahed.

[Mike Ryan]

Three times, it's only once you got to. Sometimes you got to re up the mitzvah.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

And my bar mitzvah, you feel like you haven't done the mitzvah recently, you got to re up it. My bar mitzvah was 31 years ago. Okay? And you.

[Mike Ryan]

All this, and you didn't play goldeneye?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I told you what I was doing. So when you get bar mitzvah, you get gifts, get a lot of good gifts, but you always got that one or two or three family members who get you the shittiest gift possible.

[Dan Le Batard]

Sweater.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Oh, it's the equivalent of a sweater. The shittiest gift possible you can get when you're bar mitzvah. Dreidel and all. Nah, man. Dreidel is a terrible bar mitzvah, I guess, for a Hanukkah player. Just sit back and listen. Every Jewish young man knows exactly what the worst bar mitzvah gift is that you could possibly get. And the worst bar mitzvah gift that you could possibly get is a bond. James Bond's worst.

[Mike Schmitz]

I was right there for everybody. We were all tripping over one another. No, we were like the Oklahoma Sooners coming out before Ole Miss. James Bond.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

It's an Israeli Bond. And you get the little note that they also planted a tree for your ass. All right. In Israel. In Israel, yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

Not even a US Bond. An Israeli bond.

[Mike Schmitz]

Basically the same thing.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

And they planted a tree for my ass, too. Now I can't even tell you how much. I don't care about either one of those things.

[Dan Le Batard]

A tree.

[Mike Schmitz]

I care about one of them very deeply.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

So you get the Israeli bond, you forget about it. And my mother tells me she found a bunch of bonds for my bar mitzvah.

[Mike Schmitz]

Oh, all right, hold up.

[Mike Ryan]

How much are you.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

A bunch of bonds that were never cash and have accrued money.

[Mike Ryan]

Murray.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Over the last 31 years.

[Mike Schmitz]

Are you about to tell me you're a millionaire?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

And not only that, by the way. Not only that, but a gift that I used to get when I was young as well. Really young. I used to have these Disney stocks.

[Mike Schmitz]

Oh, you're a millionaire.

[Mike Ryan]

Shut the hell up.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

My mother found Disney stocks in My name from a little kid. So let's buy the Blazer and Israeli bonds that I didn't give a shit about for my bar mitzvah, and I hate it as a gift. Well, neither of those have been realized. Neither of them have been cashed, and she's bring them to my house this week.

[Mike Schmitz]

Let's buy the Seattle Sounders. They'll just do it.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I don't have the exact number yet, but they're worth thousands of dollars, so how about that?

[Tony]

Hold up. I got a guy.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

What are you. Disappointing. It's amazing.

[Mike Schmitz]

How many thousands. You didn't say 10,000.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I don't know yet, but it's thousands of dollars.

[Mike Schmitz]

Say tens of thousands.

[Mike Ryan]

Timeout. I have to explain something to the audio audience. We just had a graphic go over our screen. When I say to use the word amateur does not. Please run that graphic again to celebrate Zaz's newfound wealth.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, look at that. Look at that. I'm like Richie Rich.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm back. Anti Soro.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That's right.

[Mike Ryan]

Anti Sora.

[Mike Schmitz]

Man.

[Mike Ryan]

What is that?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

So I'm about to be. I'm about to dive into it headfirst like Scrooge McDuck. So my mother. My mother is coming over with my bonds that I hated when I got for my bar mitzvah and a bunch of stocks from Disney, which I believe my parents got for me when I was a little kid, and neither of them have been cashed, and now they're mine.

[Mike Ryan]

Are you saying their current value. Thousands of dollars, or were they thousands of dollars back?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

No, like. Like the bonds. Here's $100 bond, you know?

[Mike Ryan]

Right.

[Tony]

Yeah, but compound is over 30 years.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Right?

[Tony]

That'.

[Dan Le Batard]

Right.

[Mike Schmitz]

Right.

[Mike Ryan]

I need someone to look this up for me. Israeli bond, 31 years ago, which is what, 19?

[Tony]

31 years ago.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

94.

[Mike Ryan]

94. What's it worth today?

[Tony]

I'm on it.

[Mike Ryan]

I need to find out. And you said you had multiples of.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

Multiples.

[Tony]

How many? Just so I don't know.

[Mike Ryan]

I didn't ask.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

She's bringing it over.

[Mike Ryan]

And then the Disney stock is from the 80s?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, definitely.

[Mike Schmitz]

Dog.

[Mike Ryan]

He might be able to buy.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, that's right. Play from the 80s. That's right. Found money.

[Mike Schmitz]

So you don't know exactly how much this is?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I don't know yet.

[Mike Ryan]

This is.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

But I can tell you I already know what daddy's buying. All right. You want to take a stab at it? Mike?

[Mike Schmitz]

Las Vegas Aces.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

No, no, it's not.

[Tony]

John Cena tickets.

[Mike Schmitz]

Bingo.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That's right. Now we're going to see. Now, I don't care how much those tickets are your boy. We're gonna see John Cena in D.C. next month, Saturday night's main event. Now, the question is, what is my wife gonna say when she realizes that's what I'm spending the money on?

[Mike Ryan]

Blew all the money on.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Because these tickets are very expensive. We're talking several thousand dollars is sitting near the ring. And obviously, that's what your boy does when he goes to the big wrestling matches. So what is my wife gonna say? I don't know. We're gonna find out.

[Mike Ryan]

Does she know about the bonds and the.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I told her yesterday.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah, just explain to her that it's John Cena's last match.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, she'll probably understand.

[Mad Dog]

No.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Why did I tell her? Because what's gonna happen when I buy the John Cena tickets and she sees how much it costs?

[Mike Ryan]

I've already.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Of course she's gonna.

[Mike Ryan]

Why would she. See how they got.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Because we have a bank account.

[Dan Le Batard]

No.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

What do you mean, no?

[Mike Schmitz]

Joint.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

We do have a bank.

[Mike Ryan]

You gotta have another bank account.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

No, no, The Shenanigans are one of these crazy couples that have separate.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah. Gotta have a Shenanigans account.

[Mike Schmitz]

Shenanigans llc.

[Mike Ryan]

Come on, man.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

No, no, no. We. We have a. We have a mutual checking account, Shenanigans Incorporated. Okay, well, I don't have one.

[Dan Le Batard]

Excell.

[Mike Ryan]

Come on, man.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

So your boy's going to see John Cena because The lamest bar mitzvah gifts ever.

[Mike Ryan]

That's right. Hold on. Your boy has to ask permission to see John Cena?

[Mike Schmitz]

All of this is wrong.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Which part?

[Mike Schmitz]

The fact that you might be sitting on substantial money and I get to see John Cena once I run it by my wife.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

No, no, there's no running act.

[Tony]

Boys, I got some bad news. The Zaslow Mansion may take a little bit of a hit here. The value of an Israeli bond from 1994 depends entirely on its face, face value, specific to what type it is. Was it a Jubilee? Was it a Mazel Tov, or was it a Maccabee?

[Mike Ryan]

I don't know.

[Tony]

Okay, and its interest rate, maturity date. Israeli bonds from 1984 would have matured some time ago. Most Israeli bonds have a maturity of up to 10 or 15 years, though some bond types are shorter or longer, and generally do not accrue interest after maturity.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Okay, well, Bob went and matured. How much am I talking about here?

[Tony]

I think it said from 100 buc bucks. It might be 164.

[Mike Schmitz]

No way. Check out the Disney stock. No way.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

My mother told me it's thousands of dollars.

[Tony]

She may have been wrong.

[Mike Schmitz]

How much? How much Disney stock? Do we know?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I don't know. I don't know.

[Mike Ryan]

Do you know remember what year you said you're a little kid?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

80S. It's gotta be late.

[Mike Ryan]

85. Let's say 87.

[Dan Le Batard]

87.

[Mike Ryan]

Running man year. Yeah. Oh, man.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I thought these were the worst gifts, man.

[Mike Ryan]

They are the worst gifts.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

They're the worst gifts.

[Mike Ryan]

No, they are the worst gifts.

[Tony]

Killian.

[Mike Ryan]

I'll be back. Only in a rerun. Oh, ass. Off to Richard Dawson, man.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yo, don't try and rain on my parade here.

[Tony]

Tony, I'm just trying to help you, buddy.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

My mother knows. She told me it's worth thousands of dollars.

[Tony]

I don't know if she knows.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

She knows.

[Dan Le Batard]

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[Mike Ryan]

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[Dan Le Batard]

It's a lot. Lights, noise, pumpkin, spice. It's everywhere. But one feeling that we are all still chasing is coziness. And Bombas has the socks, slippers and tees, basically everything to get you there. There's something oddly therapeutic about a fresh pair of socks. And Bombas knows that feeling embedded into everything they make. Slippers you can melt into tees that feel just right. Comfort that holds up wash after wash. And gifting bumpers makes that easy, too. Your wife, your kid, your kid's girlfriend, your neighbor's newborn, your mom's new friend. Yeah, they got socks for them all. They're even stepping up the footwear game. New colors, new styles, fluffy things, suede things. If you got feet, they've got something for you. And the best part, every pair you buy, Bombas donates one to someone experiencing homelessness. Cozy for you, cozy for someone else. I wear Bombas. I got myself three pairs of underwear from Bombas. And they don't ride up, they don't bunch. They are very comfortable, very soft and enjoyable to wear. It's cozy season. It's Bombus season. Head over to bombas.comdan and use code DAN for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O M B A S.com D A N and use code D A N at checkout.

[Tony]

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[Mike Ryan]

Don LeBatard.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

My algorithm on Instagram is Dan. It's all boobs.

[Mike Schmitz]

Stugats.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

It's a good algorithm. This is the Dan Levatar show with the stugats.

[Mike Ryan]

While Tony does the research on the Disney stock From the late 80s, I want to talk about what How Mad Dog reacted to some of the Dodgers kind of shenanigans, to use that word. Again, we have that clip.

[Mad Dog]

When you're a national broadcaster and you're the voice of the sport on a big stage, when you did a million playoff games and then they. In one of the crippling losses that a franchise is going to have in the history of the sport, that's as bad a loss as you're ever going to have. And I got Joe. Basically, the body's not even cold yet. And I got Joe at Dodger Stadium doing a freaking Dodger parade. Oh, my God. That's bad. I'm sorry. I don't care what you say. You could say I'm a guy. I'm, you know, screaming and yelling about nothing. That. That would piss me off. If I'm a. If I'm a Blue Jay fan. I got Joe Davis shaking everybody's hand. Give me a free Yama. Shaking freaking Ohtani's hand. And he's freaking wacky.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Getting rings. Bailed on Yamamoto for the World Series.

[Mad Dog]

You think Kirk Gowdy was getting any of this nonsense?

[Mike Ryan]

Kirk Gowdy?

[Mad Dog]

You think Garage Iola was doing a parade in 82 with the condo?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I was wondering what he was doing.

[Mad Dog]

Oh, my God. And he's got the trophy right there. God. If you're a Blue Jay fan, you're vomiting right now. That is bad. I don't care what you say. That is. You could say I'm being hard. That's ridiculous. Chris. What's the big deal? He does that games. Nonsense. He's the voice of the World Series. He's supposed to be right down the middle. Obviously, he's rooting his ass off for the Dodgers in the World Series. And everybody who I spoke to hated the idea they sensed he was doing for the Dodgers but at the World Series. And his call at the end was ridiculous. You got to be a champion. And not that. Whatever he said about knocking a defending champion out. And then he's waxing poetic about Kershaw at the end of the game that nobody in America cared about. Oh, my God.

[Dan Le Batard]

That.

[Mad Dog]

That's bad.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

And that's wrong.

[Mad Dog]

And that's not the way you do it. I don't care. Call me anything you want. Call me an old man on a hill screaming, get off my lawn. Say anything want. That's bogus. The Dodgers should be in. The Dodgers should have done him a favor. Joe, you know what? You're the voice of the team. We just won a classic. Why don't you Lay low here. We'll get somebody else into this. It's like we'll get. Daniel David Dasay does the pre. And why don't you lay low? This is not the time for you. You're the voice of baseball in postseason play. You can't be doing our parade waxing poetic about us at the Blue Jays expense.

[Mike Ryan]

Wrong.

[Mad Dog]

Top of the hour.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

He's going to get a ring. Joe Davis, our goat.

[Mike Ryan]

Of course he is. He's the. He's the voice of the Dodgers.

[Tony]

Yep.

[Mike Ryan]

He's the only guy other than Vin Scully to call Dodgers games.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Right. For people to understand, not only is Joe Davis the voice of the Dodgers, but in that parade, like, he's the.

[Mike Ryan]

Mc, which is typical.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yes.

[Mike Ryan]

Fitzgerald up in. In Golden State. He's the mc.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Every time they want to see Goldstein each year, the Panthers. Absolutely.

[Mike Ryan]

Like, that's. That's typical.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yes.

[Mike Ryan]

The. If the Knicks win the championship, Mike Breen is going to be doing that.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

You would assume Mike Breen is also the guy. I guess that's. That's the difference in that. And that Joe Davis and Mike Breen are also the guys that do the call for the national broadcast. But I think all of us can agree they're very professional. I never watched that and for one moment thought, oh, this guy wants the Dodgers to win.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I gotta tell you, if I'm a Blue Jays fan, like, dogs going nuts over it. If I'm a Blue Jays fan, God, I don't care. I just don't care.

[Mike Ryan]

I want to vomit because we lost, not because the guy who called the game is like, that's him at the parade. What's he doing there?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I do agree with Dog there. I. I didn't like the final call.

[Mike Ryan]

I thought you didn't like it.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I thought it was a weird.

[Mike Ryan]

They always try to do something like grot with gravitas.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, I'm with Dog on that one. I didn't like it.

[Mike Ryan]

So you think it was nonsense? He's the voice of the World Series. He's supposed to be right down the middle. Obviously. If we could get just fine.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yep. It was a clutch move. Like, he knew I'm in trouble here.

[Tony]

I don't have that one very.

[Mike Ryan]

He pulled the red cord, by the way.

[Tony]

Doing a little investigating here on the Disney stocks.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

How much I owe? How much I have.

[Tony]

Now you're talking. Israeli Bonds.

[Dan Le Batard]

Cooked.

[Mike Ryan]

Cooked.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I don't think it's cooked, man.

[Tony]

Sorry to tell you.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I got a lot of money.

[Tony]

I think you know how bonds work, buddy. I Don't think you know how bonds were, but with stocks. Okay, so I'm looking at 1987 is kind of the year that we said could be earlier, could be later, but whatever. The price for those Disney stocks was 348 at that time. Disney's trading right now for 109 bucks.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

There you go.

[Tony]

A little bit of a down year for Disney. But to what Mike said, which what I was looking up, what I wanted to see is there's been many stock splits.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That's good when they split.

[Tony]

For people that don't know in the investing world, a stock gets to a certain point, they split it and it creates more. Stocks double up. Ninth March of 1986. So hopefully you got them in before 86, which we don't know, but there was a 4 for 1 stock split. Then in May of 92, another 4 for 1 stock split.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Hell yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

The movie started.

[Tony]

If you're.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Hell yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

When the movie started rolling out, they were like, oh, we got this.

[Tony]

July of 98, all three for one stock split.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Hell yeah.

[Tony]

Now we're looking at even more.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I'm pretty sure I'm rich. Now.

[Tony]

The most recent split, it goes like June 07.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Give me my money. Graphic.

[Tony]

One for one split. So you're looking at four, four, three, and another split.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I'm looking at being rich is what we're looking at.

[Tony]

So you're looking at potentially we. Again, we don't know the number of stocks you have. We'll find that out when your mom shows up.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Probably enough to retire.

[Tony]

Better hope.

[Mike Ryan]

342 to 109 split. But with all the splits, split 11 ways or more.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

All right, if I'm not here Monday, you know why?

[Mad Dog]

Give me a freak yo mama shaking freaking yo mama.

[Mike Schmitz]

I found out why it's called begonia. Begonia refers to a classical myth about a ritualistic method to spontaneously generate bees from a sacrifice bull's carcass. Now, part of the backdrop of this film is the two kidnappers blame this tech CEO for a bee colony collapse. Yamama. Hey, you guys want to play a game?

[Mike Ryan]

Let's play a game. What do you got?

[Mike Schmitz]

I got real or fake podcast.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, I love this game.

[Dan Le Batard]

Listen up. Time to think fast. Is this a real or fake podcast?

[Mike Schmitz]

That's pretty much the rules. You guys have to figure out if something is a real or fake podcast. Sometimes it may seem easy, sometimes it may seem very difficult. But we have fun along the way. First one up.

[Mike Ryan]

Okay.

[Mike Schmitz]

The Keith Bullock Show.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That's just what it's called does that.

[Mike Schmitz]

Be real or fake?

[Mike Ryan]

So the question here is, does Keith Bullock have a podcast?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Right. Yeah. So I'm. I'm gonna go real then.

[Mike Ryan]

Well, don't look it up.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I'm not looking anything up. Not looking at you. How dare you.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go fake. It's too straightforward. I don't think he has a podcast.

[Mike Schmitz]

The Keith Bullock show is fake.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah. Oh, just too straightforward. Although I like it. I like it as a. As a change up there, Mike.

[Mike Schmitz]

Free range with Von Miller.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, that's real.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I'm going fake.

[Mike Ryan]

That's real.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Vaughn, what does free range mean?

[Mike Ryan]

Like, he like cowboy man. He always be wearing cowboy hats.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

He's not cowboy.

[Mike Ryan]

He's cowboy. I'm going.

[Tony]

Farms got chickens.

[Mike Ryan]

Yep. Free Range. I'm going real.

[Mike Schmitz]

It is a brand new real podcast.

[Mike Ryan]

Hey, I'm two for two.

[Mike Schmitz]

Megapod with Calvin Johnson.

[Mike Ryan]

Calvin. I feel like if Calvin Johnson had a podcast, we would have heard about it and also wouldn't have called it Mega podcast.

[Mike Schmitz]

Why? His nickname is Megatron.

[Mike Ryan]

I know, but Megapod?

[Mike Schmitz]

It almost makes too much sense.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Just admit you didn't know that was his nickname.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah, I didn't know the Georgia Tech grad is named Megatron.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I'm going real.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm gonna go fake.

[Mike Schmitz]

Fake.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, three for three, baby.

[Mike Schmitz]

Next one. Pugilist specialist with Lennox Lewis.

[Mike Ryan]

Wordy, Way too erudite. That sounds like Lennox Lewis to me. Who, by the way, do you guys know this? He grew up with. With Russell Peters, the stand up comedian. Like they're. They're friends. Like his mom knows him and everything.

[Mike Schmitz]

Perhaps it's something they cover in Pugilist specialist.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go Real sass.

[Mike Schmitz]

He's thinking.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah.

[Tony]

You know what pugilist means?

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

No.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Do I look like someone who doesn't know what pugilist means?

[Tony]

You look like a little confused, but stop talking.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I'm going real.

[Mike Schmitz]

Tony, you want to venture a guess?

[Tony]

It's fake.

[Mike Schmitz]

It is indeed fake.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm three for four.

[Mike Schmitz]

And finally, Clipboard Jesus with Charlie Whitehurst.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's funny.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That's gotta be fake. No one's calling themselves Jesus.

[Mike Schmitz]

His nickname when he played was Clipboard Jesus because you know that Jesus.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I actually didn't know that.

[Mike Schmitz]

Someone didn't know a nickname, huh?

[Mike Ryan]

I'm going real.

[Mike Schmitz]

It is fake.

[Mike Ryan]

Ah, that's a tough game. 3 for 5.

[Mike Schmitz]

Hey, that's still a success. This game can be really hard sometimes.

[Mike Ryan]

I did it. I did it. Man, I lived it. I. You know what I love? I love. I watch Pluto tv, and they always have ads for what's my man, the fighter and the. And the. And the kid or whatever. That podcast. They have a million ads for it every time. And I'm just like, should I be advertising on Pluto tv? Because I don't know if you know this as Pluto TV is the future.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Why? What's so good about. I always see the app.

[Mike Schmitz]

We're going back to channel surfing, pal.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, man.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Oh, really?

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I always see the app, but I never click on it.

[Mike Schmitz]

You got YouTube. You got Disney fighting. I'm sick of all of it. I pay hundreds and hundreds of dollars, probably equal to the Israeli bonds that you have in streaming services.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

You pay a lot then.

[Mike Schmitz]

And still I sit down and I'm like, I don't want to watch any of this stuff. I miss. As a child that grew up in the 90s. I miss channel surfing.

[Mike Ryan]

You just grab a remote and go up, up, up, and then you see something on your screen that's already in progress. And my. You have my attention.

[Mike Schmitz]

I'm a Pluto TV guy now.

[Mike Ryan]

Pluto tv. Let me tell you where Pluto TV is most clutch. The most clutch.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

You have to pay subscription for it.

[Mike Ryan]

It's free.

[Mike Schmitz]

It's free.

[Mike Ryan]

Gratis.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah.

[Tony]

Mad ads.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

What channels it gets.

[Mike Schmitz]

You get ads.

[Mike Ryan]

Not any more ads than regular television.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah, regular television.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

What kind of channels you get?

[Mike Ryan]

You.

[Mike Schmitz]

The channels are outstanding. If you like movies, we got that. There's just a 90s movie channel that Forrest Gump was.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

So why don't I have Pluto app?

[Mike Ryan]

You just get it.

[Mike Schmitz]

I don't understand why you don't have free.

[Mike Ryan]

So this is the new thing, Mike. You travel a lot.

[Mike Schmitz]

I do.

[Mike Ryan]

You see more and more of these hotels.

[Mike Schmitz]

I know exactly where it's the most clutch. Where Airbnbs slash hotels.

[Mike Ryan]

You get. You get into the hotel room, and I'm like, okay, you got local news. All right. Oh, msnbc, NBC of Hawks and all that. So, okay, well, hello, you got a Pluto tv. I get in there, and all of a sudden, you know what I'm doing? I'm tuning into that bar rescue channel.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yes.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm watching back to back.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

They have a channel that just shows bar rescue episodes.

[Mike Schmitz]

Just show you like I Love Lucy.

[Mike Ryan]

I love.

[Mike Schmitz]

Jonathan Zazzle may say to himself, man, I love Lucy.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I don't.

[Mike Schmitz]

Well, there's an entire channel dedicated to I Love Lucy. Did you like MTV? But in the 90s, yeah, we got a channel for you.

[Mike Ryan]

Zaz how about the A Team? Would you like to just watch the A Team episodes back to back to back?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I like the A Team.

[Mike Ryan]

They have an A team channel. Hey, do you want to watch black movies from the 90s specifically?

[Mike Schmitz]

And they'll hit you over the head right on the nose. That's what it's called. Black movies from the 80s.

[Mike Ryan]

Wow. The Golden Child followed by Beverly Hills Cop.

[Mike Schmitz]

Like yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

On Pluto app.

[Mike Schmitz]

At any given time, Booty call is on. Forrest Gump is on. Predator is on all of them. And Bob Ross just painting away.

[Mike Ryan]

You want to watch Bob Ross non stop?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Not really.

[Mike Schmitz]

Are you high off your ass? Want to melt in your couch? Bob Ross channel.

[Mike Ryan]

Did I mention that they have a bar rescue channel? And if you love bar rescue, there's a new podcast called here's the science of Bar. Bar rescue podcast. It's me, it's Zach Harper, it's Chelsea Reynolds, it's Colin Kassard. Get it. Wherever you get podcast, support it. Especially if you work in industry. Especially we're having guests. If you work in industry, especially if you worked at a bar that was rescued. A bar rescued bar. You're going to come on our show. We're going to ask you about the experience.

[Mike Schmitz]

That's a great title for the pod.

[Mike Ryan]

Here's the Science.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah. I love how he would just.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Was your bar rescued by bar rescue?

[Mike Schmitz]

You just give people. Did you know here's the Science.

[Mike Ryan]

Mike, did you know that if you get a customer to order food, they're more likely to stay up to 50 minutes longer?

[Mike Schmitz]

Do know that?

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah. That's the kind of science you learn on here's the Science. But back to Pluto tv.

[Mike Schmitz]

Dude, I saw it is the future. I saw a bartender scoop ice with the glass.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, no.

[Mike Schmitz]

I screamed shut it down. Yeah, you can't be doing that. You gotta burn that because you can break the glass.

[Mike Ryan]

You're gonna kill somebody.

[Mike Schmitz]

You can kill somebody.

[Mad Dog]

Yum.

[Mike Schmitz]

Ice looks like glass.

[Mike Ryan]

You gotta burn it. You don't know this?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

No, I don't know about Pluto. That's what we're talking about it.

[Mike Ryan]

We're talking about bars used to be a planet.

[Mike Schmitz]

Telling you Pluto tv. We're all gonna go back. We're going back. Jack. If you watch I love what WPLG did, which is like, we don't need abc. We'll just be live and local. We're just going to concentrate on local. They even have some heat games. Like we're just. If you live in Miami, we're for you, wg.

[Mike Ryan]

That's how I learned. That's how I learned about the fire.

[Mike Schmitz]

As everything is artificial and algorithm, people are going to be gravitating to something that is grittier, more real, more sense of community. And also they're going to realize, man, this shit was better in the 90s. Oh, my God, miss channel surfing. And Pluto TV does that.

[Mike Ryan]

It has. You know what I love? So, for instance, that bar rescue channel, you would. One would think I was like, okay, so they start with season one, episode one, and then two and no, no, no, no, no. It's all random. It's all random from all eras of the bar rescue show. It reintroduces that feeling of mystery. I don't know what's coming next. That's the thing that kids are missing. They don't know about that. How you used to be turn on the tv like, oh, this is my favorite episode of the Fresh Prince of Bel Air. And then you just sit down and then the next episode is like, wait, Aunt Viv is back to the old Aunt Viv? Yeah, because that's how it is, man.

[Mike Schmitz]

I was watching the Bob Ross channel last night and I saw a rerun. It was one that I saw when I was in an Airbnb in D.C. for MLS All Star. I'm like, I seen this one. This one's great. I watched the whole thing twice. What's chat about Miller Lite. That's right. Football season is in high gear. The leaves are turning. That means these football games have more consequence. That means you'll be tense. You want to enjoy these games. Well, enjoy these games like I enjoy these games with a Miller Lite by my side. It makes tailgating better. It makes catching up with friends easier. Game day just hits different with a Miller Lite in your hand. From jaw dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, it's a beer that has been there for every moment. 50 years of great taste. Simple ingredients in that iconic golden color that you can spot from across the room. Look at that beauty. And here's the kicker. It's just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting five decades later. So whatever your game day looks like, remember, Miller Time is always a good time. Miller Lite, great taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories. And 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Quick time out here to talk to you about the official ticketing partner of the Dan LeBatard Show. Speaking, of course, about game time. The GameTime app gives the advantage back to you fans. It's the hack for unlocking amazing tickets and experiences in just a few taps. It's incredibly easy to use and the Game Time guarantee means you'll trust that you'll get 100% authentic tickets on time and at the best price. Plus fees are always included. So what you see is what you pay. They got favorites, they got zone deals, they get panoramic CPU is my favorite feature. The low price guarantee and gametime's unparalleled ticket coverage, which means your purchase is covered with the most flexible customer service policy in the ticketing industry. Take the guesswork out of buying NFL tickets with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account and use code DAN for $20 off your first purchase terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code dan for $20 off. Swipe, tap Ticket. Go download the Gametime app today.

[Mike Ryan]

What does Zyn give you?

[Tony]

Not just smoke free nicotine satisfaction, but real freedom. Freedom to do what you love and choose your rewards. With Zinn Rewards, you can redeem points.

[Mike Ryan]

For premium tech, outdoor gear and gift cards to your favorite retailers. Find your Zinn and keep finding rewards.

[Tony]

That fit your [e-mail] rewards.

[Mike Ryan]

Warning.

[Tony]

This product contains nicotine. Nicotine is an addictive chemical.

[Mike Schmitz]

Don LeBatard I went in the margins. I'm like, I'm like, you're Moneyball of sex. I'm basically Scott Hatterberg.

[Tony]

Stugats a lot of walks, but I'm.

[Mike Schmitz]

On base when it comes to sex. Other, other dudes, they can be Giambi.

[Tony]

You know your role, you play.

[Mike Schmitz]

I know my role.

[Dan Le Batard]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the stug.

[Mike Ryan]

Mike. If I may, I've got Pluto TV in front of me right now. I'd like to shout out some of the channels and what they're playing.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah, go through the program.

[Mike Ryan]

First channel I've got in front of me called TV Land Drama.

[Mike Schmitz]

What is that about?

[Mike Ryan]

They've got shows like JAG right now. Diagnosis Murder is playing solid, right?

[Tony]

Then we Diagnosis Murder, Prognosis Negative.

[Mike Schmitz]

Is Matlock on that one or does Matlock have its own channel? Because I know Columbo has its own channel. On Pluto.

[Mike Ryan]

I think Matlock has its own channel. Good, We've got a Bobby Flay.

[Mike Schmitz]

I just want to watch Matlock and Only Matlock.

[Mike Ryan]

We've got a Bobby Flay Channel. They're playing brunch at Bobby's slumber party. We've got a.

[Tony]

Was it brunch or was it a slumber party?

[Mike Ryan]

Well, it's a little bit of both. They woke up. Guess what?

[Tony]

At Bobby's place.

[Mike Schmitz]

What's for. What's for brunch?

[Mike Ryan]

We've got bet throwbacks right now. Oh, five minutes left in an episode of Hanging with Mr. Cooper.

[Mike Schmitz]

Oh, that's great. Do they play old rap cities?

[Mike Ryan]

No, because next we have Everybody Hates Chris, which is also a great, great one. Hey, would you like Pluto trending now? How about you watch 28 days later, the movie?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Ooh, I want to see that.

[Mike Ryan]

There you go. What about Pluto icons? You want to watch mermaids? Winona Ryder? Cher? Nah.

[Mike Schmitz]

No, no, but that's why you keep flipping the channels.

[Mike Ryan]

Hey, hey, hey, hey. My friend here, he's never watched James Bond. Could it be that There's a Pluto 007?

[Tony]

No.

[Mike Ryan]

The world is not enough.

[Dan Le Batard]

No.

[Mike Ryan]

Right now, 2 hours and 35 minutes left, followed by Die Another Day.

[Mike Schmitz]

You know who did the. The song for the World Is Not Enough.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Oh, let me think. Adele.

[Mike Schmitz]

No, no. Garbage.

[Mike Ryan]

Mmm. Szazz.

[Tony]

How about the World Is Not Enough? James Bond uncovers a nuclear plot while protecting an oil heiress from her former kidnapper, an international terrorist who can't feel pain.

[Mike Schmitz]

The sequel to that.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That sounds good.

[Mike Schmitz]

Was Die Another Day. You know. You know who did the song to that?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Adele?

[Mike Schmitz]

No. Madonna.

[Tony]

James Bond is sent to investigate a connection between North Korean terrorists and a diamond mogul who's funding the development of an international space weapon.

[Mike Ryan]

Ooh, ah, ah. Die Another Day. Hey, Roy, I want to watch a movie that has Wesley Snipes but is based on a Michael crichton book. Passenger 57, not a Michael Crichton book.

[Mike Schmitz]

You ever see Skyfall?

[Mike Ryan]

No.

[Mike Schmitz]

You know who did the song for Skyfall?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Let me think.

[Dan Le Batard]

Drop Zone.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Adele.

[Mike Schmitz]

Actually, you're right there.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Knew it.

[Mike Ryan]

When the sky Falls.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Right?

[Mike Ryan]

That was it. The Art of War was the answer.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, the Art of War.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

You know, I could watch the Art.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Of War was that sure wasn't passenger.

[Mike Ryan]

57, Pluto action, followed by the art of war 2, betrayal, and the art of war 3. I don't even know what that.

[Dan Le Batard]

Sequel to this movie.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah. How about Pluto Reaction? We got Species, the Awakening. Oh, how about Pluto Fantastic. Divergent. The Divergent series. How about Pluto comedy? The 430 movie, followed by Bull Durham. How about Pluto Drama? Coach Carter Followed by Amistad. How about Pluto Romance? Clueless, followed by Sleepover. How about BET Cinema on Pluto. Jackie Brown.

[Mike Schmitz]

They have a ton of movies that you would watch if you were just flipping through the channels, but when you sit down on your couch, you have decision fatigue. You're like David Blatt. You're a fighter pilot. I got so many options, I just can't make a single one. Please, Pluto, make my decision for me. Clueless. That sounds lovely. I can half pay attention to that. Thank you.

[Mike Ryan]

Hey, Mike, you want to watch Jackie Brown? When that's over, you can watch Flight. God help me. God help me.

[Tony]

I'm drunk right now.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That plane was upside down.

[Tony]

You saw my boy Denzel work.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Should have given him a medal landing that plane upside down.

[Mike Ryan]

Tony, this one's for you right now on Pluto. Thrillers. The Running Man. Oh. Followed by Basic Instinct, by the way.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Oh, yeah, baby.

[Mike Ryan]

Mike, you like horror movies? How about Succubus? That's on right now. Pluto Horror on Pluto Terror. We've got Scream 3 on Pluto 2000's replay. We have Joe Dirt on Pluto.

[Mike Schmitz]

This is the greatest thing.

[Mike Ryan]

90S throwback. Saving Private Ryan. Pluto 80s rewind. Platoon. Pluto 70 Cinema Rancho Deluxe Movie Channel. Pluto. I don't know why that's a different.

[Mike Schmitz]

I honestly want to strip away all my other apps here in New Talk right now. Like, there's no reason.

[Mike Ryan]

Why am I.

[Mike Schmitz]

Why am I HBO maxing? Well, because I'm on there. That's why I'm hbo.

[Mike Ryan]

Max, let me tell you something. If they told me you're destitute. All you can afford is your Internet bill, and that's it. Can't afford Netflix, all that. Look, I'd miss them. I'd miss them. But you know what will keep me warm at night? Pluto tv.

[Mike Schmitz]

It's just great for when you don't know what to watch.

[Mike Ryan]

By the way, they also have an On Demand section now.

[Mike Schmitz]

I'm gonna miss my sports. I'm going to miss my sports. I like my Premier League soccer. That's why I keep it on the cock.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

But, yeah, love the cock.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yes, but movies flipping through. Sometimes you don't know what you want to watch, and you need them to speak to you.

[Mike Ryan]

Can I. Can I say something? Let me speak directly to our friends at NBC and Peacock.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Go look right at your camera.

[Mike Schmitz]

They do have fast channels. They do have some of those.

[Mike Ryan]

They do. They do have fast channels. And I do appreciate that you like.

[Mike Schmitz]

That Stone Phillips they got you.

[Mike Ryan]

This is what I need from them, though.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Look right into your camera.

[Mike Ryan]

I need Insights to Excellence. A fast channel for that. I was looking for it this week. Didn't get an episode.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Oh, they're making you yearn for it.

[Mike Ryan]

Getting antsy.

[Mike Schmitz]

Isn't it a little crazy that he used one of these episodes to lament load management?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Why is that crazy?

[Mike Ryan]

He didn't lament.

[Mike Schmitz]

Well, because he did this all in one shooting.

[Mike Ryan]

He didn't lament it, Michael. He didn't lament it. Lamento ball.

[Mike Schmitz]

I mean, I'd like to see fresh ones. I'd like for him to talk about Thiago.

[Mike Ryan]

This is fresh. Have you seen it before? It's fresh then.

[Mike Schmitz]

But I'd like for him to react to Thiago Splitter and what he's. And this incredible turnaround of the Portland Trail.

[Tony]

I wanted to hear about Tar Eason.

[Mike Ryan]

Tell me more about Kayson Wallace. A.J. mitchell's getting more minutes. Tell me more, Michael.

[Mike Schmitz]

Definitely. Real names that I've heard before.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, man. I just want. Just right here. Give me a belt. You got a belt? You ain't got a belt?

[Dan Le Batard]

No, man.

[Tony]

You wear belts?

[Mike Schmitz]

No.

[Tony]

Me neither.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Try and be comfortable, dog.

[Tony]

I don't wear belts ever.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, me neither.

[Tony]

Never worn a belt, y'.

[Mike Ryan]

All. Y' all end up on that since I. To excellence.

[Tony]

I like it.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, I like it too.

[Tony]

I like it.

[Mike Ryan]

I don't. Yeah. I don't like the. The tone.

[Mike Schmitz]

I like it.

[Mike Ryan]

Why? It's great. I want more of it.

[Tony]

I want more of it.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That's why I said I like it.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm just like, I like them. I was disappointed, Peacock, this week. Like, where was it?

[Tony]

That's why I only said I like it because I was looking for it this week and I couldn't find it.

[Mike Ryan]

Let me tell you right now. You give me instead, I got.

[Tony]

I got Atlanta and Orlando.

[Mike Ryan]

Good game.

[Tony]

Yeah, but no insights to excellence in the middle.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah. Good game, though. All right, here we go. I need Insights into Excellence. Right there. That's what I needed right there. Wow.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Make me uncomfortable.

[Mike Ryan]

Is it? It's. I mean, that's how you get the veins popping, man. You ever play train spotting? You don't know about the trainspotting?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Yeah, I know about Trainspotting, but I never played trainspotting.

[Mike Ryan]

How you spot the train, then.

[Mike Schmitz]

You have a freebase buddy.

[Dan Le Batard]

Richard Pryor did.

[Mike Ryan]

I invented freebase.

[Mike Schmitz]

Too soon, Too soon, Too soon.

[Tony]

Come on, come on. Respect the legend.

[Mike Ryan]

You got singed eyebrows, man.

[Mike Schmitz]

Oh, Mountain Dew bottle.

[Mike Ryan]

Look, here's the deal, man. Some people like to Play it fast and loose.

[Mike Schmitz]

Get some of that Bolivian.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

Marching.

[Mike Schmitz]

You don't have to deal with any of the nose stuff.

[Mike Ryan]

Mm. Mm. Too uncomfortable. Start the sneezing. Now everyone's mad.

[Mike Schmitz]

You just need a hit.

[Mike Ryan]

Just one.

[Mike Schmitz]

Just one. You don't have to deal with the nose running at all. This is stuff that people that I know have done this, have told me.

[Tony]

Nose.

[Mike Ryan]

Look, man, y' all here, it's like you're a bird. You see this? You see this around the elser, all these turkey vultures gliding, gliding. You know what they're doing? They're freebasing.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

That's what it's like.

[Mike Ryan]

That's what it's like, baby.

[Mike Schmitz]

You'll be chasing that first high for the rest of your life.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, my gosh.

[Mike Schmitz]

Or so they say. Wow, it sounds great right around the corner, but it will destroy your lives.

[Mike Ryan]

That's what Insights to Excellence feels like to me.

[Dan Le Batard]

Just destroy your life.

[Mike Ryan]

Like, I'm going to abandon all of my responsibilities. That's why, Tony. That's why they give it to us in micro doses. Because if they gave you the whole shebang too much, we'd all be like. It'd be like Pulp Fiction. Someone needs to stab us in the heart with an adrenaline needle, wake us up.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Oh, the adrenaline shot.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah, man. Could you do that? You think you could do that?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Someone like, can I be the person.

[Mike Schmitz]

Who would you ever. Like, can you be Vincent around the. Yeah, you look around like, okay, I guess I'm the person that has to put this adrenaline needle and Uma Thurman's heart.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

I could do it.

[Mike Schmitz]

You think?

[Mike Ryan]

You think you do?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Gotta do it hard enough to smash through the breastplate, though. Yeah, I could do it.

[Dan Le Batard]

Good.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Got stabbed three times.

[Mike Schmitz]

Like, no, no bit.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

No, you don't got stab her three times.

[Mike Schmitz]

No bit. Like, would you.

[Mike Ryan]

Could you?

[Tony]

Yeah, you know the heart is right.

[Mike Schmitz]

Yeah, yeah. You know of it.

[Mike Ryan]

It's right here, Tony. Can the Rockets keep this up all season long?

[Tony]

That's a good point. I'm looking around saying, all right, two big three, big five, big lineup. Like, is. Is at some point. I mean, like, Amen Thompson going to be the answer at point guard, obviously. Fred Van Vliet, we know he's out. Feels like they're not going to make a trade for a point guard anywhere. So it's like, all right, we're going to let Almond play.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Why do they need one? Like, he's a really big point guard, sure.

[Tony]

But, like, he's still super raw and super green. At playing the position, right. It's like the same thing as Cooper Flag. Like, oh, we're playing him at point. Figured out, sure, okay. But then when everything slows down in the playoffs, is he going to be 82 games worthy of like, all right, I know what I'm doing. Versus having his entire career playing basketball knowing how to play point. Like, at some point, something's got to come to a head. Either they're going to be the biggest team and just maul everybody, or they're going to get to a point where in the half court, it's going to be like, oh, shit, kd, here's the ball. Try and do something.

[Mike Ryan]

I like the idea. Like, they played Memphis last night and they went small. And by small, I mean they started Thompson, Jabari Smith, Shingoon, Joshua Koga, Kevin Durant.

[Tony]

Everybody's like six, ten.

[Mike Ryan]

It's like that. That's their small lineup, like Thompson in the playoffs. Decision making left a lot to be desired, and it was. It was understandable energy. Young guy, first time in the playoffs playing against Golden State, Steph Curry. So there is some jitters there. But I hear what you're saying is like, you need that kind of old head. Fred Van Vliet, Mike Conley, these guys are just like, everyone settle down. I got you. Don't panic. I know they've scored a couple. What we're going to do is we're going to organize this thing and get it going.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Another good game for Ja last night.

[Mike Ryan]

Why are you on job, man?

[Mike Schmitz]

What do you mean, why am I?

[Jonathan Zazzle]

It's the biggest story in the league right now. What do you mean, why am I on jaw? Like, it's, you know, monitoring him. Got monitor.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm monitoring. But, like, I'm not. I'm not gonna be like, oh, yeah, here goes Ja, another 6 or 19 performance.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Why wouldn't you?

[Mike Ryan]

Because I know what's happening. What's happening is he is at odds with his coach. And by the way, they asked him about that, too. Do you guys see this? Tuama Isolo.

[Jonathan Zazzle]

Last night.

[Mike Ryan]

Last night because. Because Jaren Jackson didn't have a great game either. And so they were asking him about that and he said, and I've got the quotes right here. Believe me.

[Tony]

It was a weird start, though, too, because Jaren Jackson, like, you figure, all right, if they're not building around Ja, they're going to build around Jaren Jackson. But then he has six. Six shots in a game, and you're like, who are we building around?

[Mike Ryan]

He said his Efficiency has been up. About Jaren Jackson, I think he's shooting the best, blah, blah, blah. Obviously for us in this situation, we'd love to have him more involved in the offense. Like today I'm looking at these numbers and they are what they are. I can't really trust them. So obviously the half court offense is not in sync. I don't know.

[Tony]

And it looks it.

[Mike Ryan]

By the way, how do you feel about the energy levels? Like I said, very inconsistent. It comes and it goes. We need to do a better job.

[Tony]

You're in the NBA like you know what you need to do. Unless you don't. And that's the weird part about it, right? Like it just seems like everybody's in flux in Memphis and you got one guy who's fighting with the organization, you got one guy who got paid and he's like, I guess I'm, I guess I'm going to do what they tell me to do. Even though, like, I don't really know what we're doing. Just a weird situation. Anyways, all your favorite NBA players are back and DraftKings Sportsbook, an official sports betting partner. The NBA is the place to bet on NBA stars this season, like John Morant. New customers download the Draft King sportsbook app and use Code Dan. That's Code dan to get five bucks and get three months of NBA League Pass plus 300 bucks in bonus bets. If your bet wins in partnership with DraftKings, the Crown is yours.

[Mad Dog]

Yum.

[Mike Schmitz]

Let's chat about Miller Lite. That's right. Football season is in high gear. The leaves are turning. That means these football games have more consequence. That means you'll be tense. You want to enjoy these games. Well, enjoy these games like I enjoy these games with a Miller Lite by my side. It makes tailgating better. It makes catching up with friends easier. Game day just hits different with a Miller Lite in your hand. From jaw dropping touchdowns to fantasy heartbreaks, it's a beer that has been there for every moment. 50 years of great taste. Simple ingredients in that iconic golden color that you can spot from across the room. Look at that beauty. And here's the kicker. It's just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. The original light beer since 1975 and still hitting five decades later. So whatever your game day looks like, remember, Miller time is always a good time. Miller Lite great taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite. Pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.