Hour 1: Not Your Traditional Author (Feat. David Samson)

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz – Hour 1: Not Your Traditional Author (Feat. David Samson)
Release Date: November 27, 2024

From the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, hosts Dan Le Batard and Stugotz dive deep into a myriad of topics ranging from authorship and sports contracts to personal anecdotes about family and movie reviews. Featuring special guest David Samson, this episode offers a blend of insightful discussions, humor, and candid reflections.

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1. Introduction to the Episode

The episode kicks off with a playful introduction as Dan Le Batard and Stugotz set the stage for a lively conversation. The focus quickly shifts to the primary topic: Stu Gotz's newly released book, which promises unconventional perspectives on sports and pop culture.

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2. Diving into Stu Gotz's Book

Dan Le Batard opens the discussion by recounting his unexpected involvement in Stu Gotz's book project.

Dan Le Batard (00:34): "Stu Gotz is writing a book and he'd very much appreciate it if [I] would write an essay about why Shohei Ohtani's contract is or is not the worst contract in the history of sports."

Initially skeptical, Dan admits to ignoring the first email request but later commits to contributing an essay, reflecting his support despite uncertainties about the book’s authenticity.

Dan Le Batard (01:34): "I did what any friend of Stu would do. I ignored it... Then I got a follow-up email asking for the essay, and I responded saying, 'Okay, I will put as much effort into this as Stu did into the book.'"

Dan's essay on Shohei Ohtani spans two pages, completed in a single draft, highlighting the spontaneous and collaborative nature of the book's creation.

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3. The Process and Content of the Book

As the conversation unfolds, Dan critiques the book’s content, describing some arguments as "asinine" yet amusing.

Dan Le Batard (02:45): "What makes me smile is that you have arguments in here that are so asinine. That you are going to end up not taking credit for them."

Stu Gotz's unconventional viewpoints spark debate among the hosts, with Dan expressing both amusement and skepticism about the book’s stance on various sports topics.

Billy Corben (03:08): "The Kevin Durant one is all mine. The Elijah one not having any rings, all mine... I found that a lot of people were agreeing with my takes."

This segment underscores the diverse opinions within the book and sets the tone for a candid critique of Stu Gotz's perspectives.

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4. Interactions with Co-Authors and Team Members

The discussion shifts to the dynamics between Stu Gotz and his co-authors, including David Samson and Pablo. Dan reveals his efforts to support the project by purchasing multiple copies of the book.

Dan Le Batard (04:22): "I bought four copies at retail to help you in your endeavor."

However, there’s a humorous exchange about personalized letters included in the books, questioning their authenticity.

Dan Le Batard (04:16): "Stu, can you confirm that you wrote the letter...?"

Stu clarifies that the letters were handled by others, highlighting the collaborative yet somewhat disjointed process behind the book's publication.

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5. Tampa Bay Rays' Scheduling Adjustments

Transitioning from authorship, the conversation delves into sports, specifically the Tampa Bay Rays' new scheduling strategy following Hurricane Milton's damage to Tropicana Field.

Billy Corben (11:27): "The Rays, in a first, will play 47 of their first 59 games at home and 69 of their final 103 on the road to optimize for the best weather conditions."

Dan criticizes this move, arguing it's an unfair advantage compared to previous seasons when the Rays had to deal with unpredictable weather without schedule adjustments.

Dan Le Batard (12:30): "It's ridiculous. Now Tampa, one year in Steinbrenner Field, and all of a sudden I change a bunch of series around and put them on the road."

This segment highlights the challenges teams face in adapting to unforeseen circumstances and the perceived inequities in league responses.

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6. Thanksgiving Anecdotes and Personal Reflections

The hosts share personal stories about Thanksgiving, revealing humorous strategies to avoid lengthy family gatherings. Dan recounts making trades on Thanksgiving to escape the traditional six-hour meal.

Dan Le Batard (14:16): "I used to try to purposely make trades on Thanksgiving so I could get away from the Thanksgiving dinner."

Billy and Greg join in, sharing their own tactics and poking fun at the lengths they've gone to dodge the annual holiday ritual.

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7. Balancing Fatherhood and Business

A poignant segment unfolds as Dan reflects on the challenges of balancing a demanding career with family life. He candidly discusses his absence from his children's activities, leading to a heartfelt moment with guest David Samson.

Dan Le Batard (17:15): "You can't be a good father and a successful businessman... I chose work over family every time."

This honest introspection sparks a deeper conversation about personal choices, regrets, and the impact of prioritizing work over familial relationships.

David Sampson (25:01): "You can't be a good father and a successful businessman."

The dialogue underscores the recurring theme of work-life balance and invites listeners to contemplate their own priorities.

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8. Movie Reviews: "The Substance" and "Seven"

Shifting gears, the hosts delve into movie critiques, focusing on the unsettling film "The Substance" and the classic thriller "Seven."

Mike Ryan praises "The Substance," describing it as a masterpiece that blends horror and dark comedy, while acknowledging its challenging content.

Mike Ryan (27:20): "It's the darkest, most uncomfortable thing that you can imagine... It was tough to get through."

Dan contrasts this with his discomfort watching "Seven," citing its intense and disturbing narrative.

Dan Le Batard (30:02): "I was uncomfortable watching Seven. That is probably my number one least comfortable watch."

The reviews highlight the hosts' differing tastes and the evolving landscape of horror and thriller genres.

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9. Attempting to Connect with Mike Schur

Towards the episode's conclusion, Dan expresses a desire to connect with Mike Schur, referencing a project Mike is involved in. This leads to a humorous yet tense exchange about communication barriers and personal interactions.

Dan Le Batard (37:10): "I have a feeler out, actually, that I think I have a way in."

The conversation becomes increasingly playful and confrontational as the hosts tease each other about efforts to bridge professional and personal gaps.

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10. Conclusion

The episode wraps up with light-hearted banter and humorous jabs among the hosts and guest, leaving listeners with a mix of thoughtful insights and entertaining exchanges.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Dan Le Batard (01:34): "I did what any friend of Stu would do. I ignored it... Then I got a follow-up email asking for the essay, and I responded saying, 'Okay, I will put as much effort into this as Stu did into the book.'"

• Dan Le Batard (02:45): "What makes me smile is that you have arguments in here that are so asinine. That you are going to end up not taking credit for them."

• Dan Le Batard (17:15): "You can't be a good father and a successful businessman... I chose work over family every time."

• Mike Ryan (27:20): "It's the darkest, most uncomfortable thing that you can imagine... It was tough to get through."

• Dan Le Batard (30:02): "I was uncomfortable watching Seven. That is probably my number one least comfortable watch."

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Conclusion

This episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz masterfully blends critical discussions on authorship and sports contracts with deeply personal reflections on family and career. Through honest dialogue and engaging banter, Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, and David Samson offer listeners a multifaceted perspective on balancing professional ambitions with personal life, all while navigating the ever-evolving landscapes of sports and entertainment.

Transcript

[Dan Le Batard]

You're listening to DraftKings Network.

[Stugotz]

This is the Dan Levator show with the Stuttgarts podcast.

[David Sampson]

Look at David Sampson. He's got his reading glasses on. He is here to support and promote the bestselling author of much acclaim, Stu Gotz. You have your personal copy, Sampson, were you recruited to write anything for the book?

[Dan Le Batard]

Indeed I was, Dan.

[Billy Corben]

Duh.

[Dan Le Batard]

And here I am in chapter 33, and I want to tell you the story of how this absolute train wreck happened. I got a email from a guy I didn't know. Not from Stu, of course. It was this guy who's now on the title of the book, Dan Stanzik. He said, listen, Stugotts is writing a book and he'd very much appreciate it if you would write an essay, an essay about why Shohei Ohtani's contract is or is not the worst contract in the history of sports. And I did what any friend of Stu would do. I ignored it because I assumed that there was no book that was going to be written and I wasn't gonna waste my time. And then I got a follow up email. Still not from Stu. No, had not heard a word from him yet. Follow up email. Hey, we're going to print soon. Do you think that you could get us your essay on Shohei Ohtani and his contract? And I responded saying, okay, I will put as much effort into this as Stu did into the book. And I then sent right here on page 204 and 205, a two pager on Ohtani. And I did it in one draft. And I made one phone call. Stu, I must tell you, I made one phone call.

[Billy Corben]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

I called Dan and I said, dan, is this book real? That was question number one. And he said, I don't think so, though I'm writing a foreword. F O R W A R D. And do you think I need to make it nice? And then I said, second question, Dan, will Stu ever read what I wrote? And Dan said, absolutely not. So I sent it. And then I went on Amazon and I bought the book because, Stu, I don't know how else I'd get the book. So I had multiple copies sent to me because I want to help you in your endeavor.

[Billy Corben]

Thank you. How many, by the way?

[Dan Le Batard]

Just, you know, I actually only bought four. I apologize.

[Billy Corben]

I should have bought eight, but okay. Anyway, go ahead.

[Dan Le Batard]

But I bought them at retail.

[Mike Ryan]

It would have been great if he said 27,000. What a great joke.

[Billy Corben]

I'll take it. I mean, I don't care.

[Dan Le Batard]

What does he care? And I Will only tell you that having read the book, Stu, what makes me smile is that you have arguments in here that are so asinine.

[Billy Corben]

Yes.

[Dan Le Batard]

That you are going to end up not taking credit for them. Which is why you're saying you didn't write them. That's what's funny about this book is that your positions are so crazy.

[Billy Corben]

The Kevin Durant one is all mine. The Elijah one not having any rings, all mine. Stark's never going to have 18. All mine. All of those are mine. I'll take them. They're good takes. They're good takes. I found that a lot of people were agreeing with my takes. That's what I found. So that was interesting.

[David Sampson]

Billy, you are smirking back there and it's red faced and it seems like it might be shame. I can't tell.

[Stugotz]

I'm embarrassed because on Stu's behalf you didn't send books to the actual people that wrote books. Like David had to buy four books.

[Billy Corben]

We sent David a book. We did. He knows he got a book.

[Dan Le Batard]

So I will tell you what happened, Billy, is that I did go on Amazon. I did the pre order and then I got a book from Stu that had a letter in it. And Stu did write the letter that I. Stu, can you confirm to me that you wrote the letter that you inserted when you sent me a copy along with the other co authors of the book? Did you write that yourself?

[Billy Corben]

No, that was Stanzik's job. And Taylor. And Taylor. Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah. So I found it to be.

[Billy Corben]

It wasn't a letter, it was weekend observations. Right. I understand that you'll get your personalized copy very soon to suggest that I'm not going to do anything for all the great people, wonderful people that contributed to this book. I understand why you would think that. I understand why everyone would think that. But I have plans for you guys. I just don't know what they are yet.

[Dan Le Batard]

So generally Stu, the way it works with being an author is that these things are done prior to the publication of the book.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah. I'm not your traditional author, David, so I'll do things on my speed, on my pace, on my, on my watch. How's that sound?

[Dan Le Batard]

But you're going to cash the traditional checks, I assume?

[Billy Corben]

Well, yes. On time. Yeah. Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

So I would just suggest that you should contact. There's a lot of amazing people, me not included. Though I'm thankful to be in it. I guess that, that, that did this for you. And the irony is that all of the people who wrote the counters to your points I did some checking. Yeah, I spoke to Pablo when we did some finding out those people actually did write those sections of the book.

[Billy Corben]

Yes. Yeah, Pablo wrote one. I don't, I don't recall asking Pablo to do anything for the book.

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean, no, he has.

[Billy Corben]

In fact, I asked Pablo to do. Yeah, you know, I asked him do an episode on the book to help promote the book. Because Lord knows all we do around here is promote Pablo. And I didn't get you. I got a frosty response. I gotta be honest with you. I mean, Pablo has been coming down here. He sits in the chair, he does the show with us. I try to make him feel comfortable. I share my platform with him. I let him promote whatever he wants to promote. I asked him to one episode to promote the book. Frosty response.

[David Sampson]

I mean, what is there to find out? He's got a certain standard, how I wrote it. But you didn't.

[Billy Corben]

It was a good idea, though. How did Stugotts write a book?

[Greg Cody]

And that was the joke. He should do a round. Thank you. He should do a roundtable with all the people who wrote it for him and not even have Stugotts show up for it.

[Billy Corben]

That's a good idea. Just promote the book. I don't care.

[Stugotz]

What was the frosty response of selling books?

[Billy Corben]

I mean.

[Chris Cote]

Yeah, what's his response? Read it.

[Billy Corben]

You coming up to New York at any time? It's like, I had to come up to New York to do the episode. Give me a break. Come down here. I mean, give me a break.

[Dan Le Batard]

Well, I want to do an episode with you on nothing personal, because I do want to talk about this process because the decision to write a book is a very personal one.

[Billy Corben]

Yes.

[Dan Le Batard]

And the decision to do it in character and to do it in the lazy way in which it was done is also an interesting decision. And what I'm curious about is your relationship with the book industry now, because you could be asked as a bestseller to rub elbows with other people in your position who are actually well known and accomplished writers. And I'm wondering. It's not about matching heaters. I'm wondering how you will act in that situation.

[David Sampson]

He's going to sell out a church next week with Greg Cody.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, yeah, no, I heard that. And that's. That's great news. That. That is where I'm sure there'll be a lot of people on their knees. Sorry, no religious jokes. But that's very nice of you. Sue. Are you making people buy the book for the signing?

[Billy Corben]

I'm in the Business of selling books, David. I am a best selling author. Of course we are making people buy the book.

[Dan Le Batard]

Okay, that's good. But here's one other word of advice. Economically, you should agree to also sign one other item that someone brings.

[Billy Corben]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

But to do that, they have to buy a copy of the book.

[Billy Corben]

Okay, I will sign whatever anyone brings to that signing. I will. But I.

[Dan Le Batard]

No, no, you can't, Stu.

[Billy Corben]

No. You're trying to do an upsell. You're saying. You're saying buy more books and I'll sign additional things. Is that what you're saying?

[Dan Le Batard]

You want me to upsell one item per book? Right.

[Billy Corben]

Okay, good. So if you bring seven books, I have to sign seven items is what you're saying?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, that's. Yes, that is the math.

[Billy Corben]

I like it. Okay, good.

[David Sampson]

So you're going to rip people off in a church.

[Billy Corben]

You want to join us?

[David Sampson]

That's what you two are going to do.

[Billy Corben]

I'm giving away a cruise also, David, not to the people who come out to the church that just do. Our top sales guy giving away any cruise right now. It's me that's irresponsible.

[David Sampson]

There are standards around here you can't promise people. We're giving them a cruise.

[Billy Corben]

It's the Internet.

[Dan Le Batard]

Let me just say for mental arc, on behalf of Meadowark, if what Stu is saying, then it is open and available to everybody. No purchase necessary. God is watching.

[Chris Cote]

Guts and sales team though.

[Billy Corben]

Listen, my finest work, as I pointed out earlier, happened in a church. I saved a wedding in a church. Church is like me. Your finest work?

[David Sampson]

Yes.

[Billy Corben]

I saved Mike's wedding.

[Mike Ryan]

Dan, we have breaking NFL news. Daniel Jones has agreed to sign with the Minnesota Vikings.

[Billy Corben]

Wow.

[Mike Ryan]

Several suitors. He prioritized a team in playoff contention, a chance to play qb friendly offensive system. This is all according to Jordan Schultz.

[David Sampson]

You know what, Schultz?

[Dan Le Batard]

I can't stand it.

[David Sampson]

I will not allow. You can't stand what? That football trumps everything. Because what I'm going to get furious about is that it trumps everything so thoroughly that we were talking about Stugatz's book and Daniel Jones going to back up in Minnesota or maybe start. I don't know how they feel about Sam Darnold.

[Mike Ryan]

Open the door to introduce.

[Billy Corben]

Getting interesting.

[Greg Cody]

Got three wows from Stugatz that did not deserve three wows from the tired author. The tired acclaimed author.

[David Sampson]

Come on.

[Greg Cody]

That move didn't deserve to interrupt what we were doing.

[Billy Corben]

Stop now. You do this all the time with me and Mike and then Sam Darnold. Gets hurt. And then Daniel Jones comes in and helps win that team. A big game that you weren't thinking Daniel Jones was going to win for the Vikings. And then it becomes a good signing.

[David Sampson]

Okay?

[Billy Corben]

That's all Mike is saying. That's all we've ever said.

[David Sampson]

It's George Hill. Mike didn't say anything. And it's.

[Billy Corben]

He's excited about it.

[Mike Ryan]

I just reported someone else's news and.

[Billy Corben]

No, because you do this all the time. There are these little sports ill. There are these little moves that are made throughout each sport, okay. And they happen during the season. And Mike and I get excited about them. We've been doing it. We've been doing so for years. And then you poo poo on them. And it's not right. Because then all of a sudden the George Hill is the classic example of a guy where you would say, why would you break into the show to tell us about George Hill? And then George Hill has 24 points. Eastern Conference semifinals, game two. That's why we brought up George Hill.

[David Sampson]

Tell me how many championships George Hill has won and all the times he's been moved.

[Billy Corben]

The dozens.

[David Sampson]

The dozens of times he's been moved as a missing piece that's actually resulted in him being the missing piece.

[Mike Ryan]

Why don't you give us a George Hill fan?

[Billy Corben]

You just won't give us anything.

[Mike Ryan]

He became. He's got zero rings.

[David Sampson]

Zero rings. So the missing piece in zero places. George Hill, who we've been talking about for 15 years. So much so that he's just made his way into a Daniel Jones story.

[Mike Ryan]

He became a contributor.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, exactly.

[David Sampson]

That was Samaki Walker. I mean, Sampson. Can you tell me, play the music here because I want to read something to Samson that is, you know, gloomy, but we've got happy music for it.

[Greg Cody]

Die.

[David Sampson]

We're all gonna die. We're all gonna die.

[Billy Corben]

We're all gonna die.

[David Sampson]

The oceans are all burning and we're all wondering why.

[Dan Le Batard]

Let's turn on the news and find.

[Billy Corben]

Out how we're gonna die.

[David Sampson]

Climate Stat of the day. Stigat's. After the roof of Trop Field was ripped off last month by Hurricane Milton, the Tampa Bay Rays are playing next season at Steinbrenner Field, which has no roof. Major League Baseball announced on Tuesday that the Rays, in a first, will play 47 of their first 59 games at home and 69 of their final 103 on the road to, quote, optimize for the best weather conditions, which is code for avoiding extreme rain, heat and storms from June To September of this year, Tampa has had 52 inches of rain, topping 1945 for the wettest rainy season on record. Project 2025 would cancel the weather forecast. And Trump's pick for energy secretary is an oil industry CEO who says, quote, there is no climate crisis. Samson. The Rays have no shot to do anything this season in the American League east because they have no home, and also because everybody in their division has more money than they do.

[Billy Corben]

The other teams are better.

[Dan Le Batard]

I totally disagree. As a matter of fact, if you speak to the players, they'd rather be on the road because the crowds are bigger and they feel more into the game. So we had. Our players always preferred to play on the road, actually, because our attendance was so small. And so that's a pretty common thing. It's not as big a disadvantage as people are making it out to be for the Rays if they don't win next year. It's just because they're not in a window to be competitive, and teams like that have windows that open and close. But it really has nothing to do with the changing of the schedule. And I was just angry when I read it because it's not fair. We had in Pro Player Stadium, we. We never got our schedule changed, and we had to deal with all the rain delays and all of the issues with change of routine, and no one ever gave a flying rat's ass. So now Tampa, one year in Steinbrenner Field, and all of a sudden I change a bunch of series around and put them on the road. It's ridiculous.

[David Sampson]

Why is it a flying rat's ass, like. And why is it a rat's ass to begin with? I don't give a rat's ass to begin with. Why? I don't understand. Where does it originate?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, they're found right at the end of the bridge. That's too far.

[Mike Ryan]

Is it safe to possibly assume that the Tampa Bay Buccaneers also had something to do with this? Because they're going to be on the road? As Tampa goes to its very nearby headquarters and uses a facility that's also on the ground. They share parking. Yeah, I can see where that becomes an issue. You could schedule around it, but it probably gave it a nudge.

[Dan Le Batard]

No, especially the attendance isn't enough, Mike, at the Rays games and the capacity, it's going to be a lot like the Tampa Tarpons games. Actually.

[David Sampson]

I couldn't believe before we started here. Did you guys hear? And for all his sour takes, David Sampson hating Thanksgiving. Who hates Thanksgiving?

[Billy Corben]

David does.

[Mike Ryan]

Can't taste the food?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah. No, I just. I don't enjoy having to be on. On sort of performing for family and the drama I used to do. This is a funny story in my head. I used to try to purposely make trades on Thanksgiving so I could get away from the Thanksgiving dinner. And so what I would do is.

[Billy Corben]

That's a heady play. I mean, revelation.

[Dan Le Batard]

And we did it and we actually succeeded in completing some transactions right on Thanksgiving.

[David Sampson]

Find out for me. Go. Go find out for me so I can recreate these. Some of the names that were traded on Thanksgiving Day or around there by the Marlins.

[Mike Ryan]

This should be a really fun Thanksgiving. Just. Just generally. And everybody wants to turn to football for an escape and then someone scores a touchdown, does a dance. Have fun, everybody.

[Dan Le Batard]

I don't really feel as though this is where you can critique me. I don't like turkey and cranberry sauce. I don't like taking out that knife that you're supposed to cut it with that you use once a year only. I don't like all the side dishes. I'm just not a big fan of people in the way they sit around and just nosh for six hours. So the way I do Thanksgiving is a little different. I announced to the family that I'll be arriving at 4:02pm and departing at 5:27pm so I'm there for about an hour and 25 minutes and I'm in and I'm out. It's like going to Wisconsin.

[Stugotz]

In 2005, the Marlins traded Josh Beckett, Mike Long, Guillermo Moda on Thanksgiving for Hanley Ramirez, Annabel Sanchez, Harvey Garcia and Jesus Delgado.

[David Sampson]

That's a hell of a. Yeah.

[Billy Corben]

Got him out of Thanksgiving though.

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean, five hours. Five hours at. @ the Boca Raton someplace in Boca where I was having thank a Thanksgiving meal and I had young kids at the time. And it just occurs to me why I am in the position I'm in personally. But I left all of them at the table.

[Billy Corben]

Just occur to you.

[Greg Cody]

Wait, you just realized the reason I'm not with my family anymore is because this how I treated Thanksgiving.

[Stugotz]

I'm curious if I go down this list of 10 biggest trades in Marlin's history that from. I think this is written in 2021 by Joe Frassaro. Like if I give you these dates, I wonder if these align with like your children's birthdays and stuff like that. Or like, oh, here's a graduation and this is why.

[Greg Cody]

Wait a minute, you're. The Marlins were a Ponzi scheme to get you out of family stuff.

[Dan Le Batard]

Not that it was a Ponzi scheme, but I would tell you that I was able to control the calendar in a lot of ways. And so I would know when we would have afternoon games or night games or when we were going to what road trips I would go on. And I will not lie to you that I did pay attention to the school calendar and I did not like being around when the kids were off from school because then they were just around all day. So I would be on the road often during those times.

[David Sampson]

Do you identify like as a dad? The adjective that you would put in front of you as a dad would.

[Dan Le Batard]

Be what a great supporter and not at all jealous of my kids accomplishments. I'm actually happy for them and I'm proud of them. But I would not in any way say that they were a priority. Their safety was and their security, but not from a time standpoint. And this just actually manifested itself last night when I was speaking to my now 21 year old son who's a senior in college. And he really had nothing to say to me and I had nothing to say to him. And we had a very quick talk and sometimes we'll talk about movies or sports, but sort of surfacey stuff. And I found out some things that he was doing that I wasn't aware of. And I had this moment like a second where I was like, man, that's so sad. And then I realized, well, wait a minute, I made this bed, I created this situation, I can't be in the least bit unhappy. And then I went back and pressed play on the movie I was watching and that was that. So you definitely, you make your bed when you're in business. You can't be a good father and a successful businessman. I don't agree that that's even possible. And some people claim they are, but they're likely mediocre at both or they think they're just delusional that they're great at both. And I made the choice to. I chose work over family every time. And I didn't lie to them about it. I told them that that's what I was choosing.

[David Sampson]

Don lebata.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, I like firing people. So I take the opportunity to fire whenever I possibly can because I can use it as a learning experience for them and try to help them out and try to point out what they did wrong. But in this case, the employee was enough levels below where I was that I did not do the firing. But I had it done within moments of discovery.

[Greg Cody]

I'm just like firing people. It's just absurd. It's absurd.

[Dan Le Batard]

Stugots. I'm talking about people who I fire, who deserve it, who have done something that actively requires me to fire them. It is my unadulterated pleasure to do so.

[Stugotz]

This is the Don Levatar show with these two gods.

[Chris Cote]

This family dysfunction and regret is presented by LinkedIn Jobs. Post your job for free at LinkedIn.com prep terms and conditions apply.

[Billy Corben]

That's how you do it.

[Greg Cody]

Chris, I don't think I heard a whole lot of regret.

[David Sampson]

You're saying flatly, I don't agree with the absolutism in that, that you can't be a great businessman and a balanced human being who is present as a father.

[Billy Corben]

What David is saying is, if he can't do it, no one can it. I mean, that's absurd. David.

[Dan Le Batard]

Stu. I'm saying that I've come across a lot of people in business, and they all say the same thing. Those at the height of their success. Something's got to give. Why do you think the divorce rate is so high at the C suite level? Why do you think that the family trauma and the therapy required is so significant at the C suite level? Because you make choices. It's very hard to do both. And I respect people who try. And I witnessed it during the course of my career, and I still do. And generally, you end up being worse at both. And so I decided to go all in, trying to be good at what I did for a living and make sure that they were supported. And to this day, I still feel that way. But at the end of the day, my job couldn't be to raise them. I tried to go to dance recitals, and this is a funny thing that I did with my middle daughter at dance recitals, which were, like, 10 hours where I could hang out with Rondell White and Cliff Floyd, et cetera. Hit the button.

[Billy Corben]

Yep. Chris, look at me.

[Dan Le Batard]

And it was great. It was called. It was called Meg Segretto. It's a place that used to be up in Broward, and they're, like, dead serious. These recitals are 10 hours, and your kid dances for, like, four minutes of it.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

And so all I had to do was be in my seat for the four minutes, but for the rest of the time, I would be in the lobby because I have no interest in watching other people's kids dance. Literally zero interest in that. So I would do work during that time and then just appear for the four minutes that she danced.

[Chris Cote]

Imagine if everyone did it that way.

[Stugotz]

David.

[Billy Corben]

What?

[Chris Cote]

You get to do that. Everyone else wants to watch all the other kids.

[Billy Corben]

I gotta be honest. I did it that way with Emma. I did.

[Chris Cote]

You guys are jerks.

[Billy Corben]

No, you get the schedule of dances. Chris, have you been to one of these?

[Chris Cote]

I was just at 18 hours long.

[Billy Corben]

There's 24 dances each set. Okay, so you get the schedule.

[Chris Cote]

You see when you're exaggerating all of that.

[Stugotz]

No, I think they hold your kid hostage. They don't let you take your kid either. You have to sit through all of it for some reason.

[Chris Cote]

Hours.

[Stugotz]

No, it is. It's pretty. Probably longer.

[Billy Corben]

Yes, I'm with David on this.

[David Sampson]

Put it on the poll, please. Juju at Lebiton show. Is your kid being held hostage?

[Greg Cody]

Hostage?

[Stugotz]

No, it's borderline illegal. Like, I don't know how it is. There's situations.

[Chris Cote]

Not borderline illegal.

[Stugotz]

No, it is borderline illegal. There's situations here where, like, you drop your child off and you're like, I will take my child now. And they're like, no, you will not. And it's like, excuse me, that's not how this works. You can't just sequester my child. But they do. And then you give up the fight, and then you go do whatever you're doing.

[Billy Corben]

So Emma's final dance would be, like, five dances before the last dance. You're right, Billy. And me and Abby would be like, hey, Emma, let's go. And they'd be like, no, Emma can't leave. She has to stay till the end. Who says I'm her parents? Not you. I mean, what are you doing?

[Dan Le Batard]

It is so unbelievable. And it's everywhere. It's not just Florida where this happens. So I found a few workarounds. And one of the workarounds you can do is that you tell your child, and we did this to our middle daughter. You have to feign sickness. And so what you do is when you're done with your dance and there's nothing left, you've had your last curtain call. I ain't sitting around and watching the other 11 year olds dance to some song I've never heard of. You go to backstage, you go to the door, and all of a sudden, out comes the little girl. And you teach her, like, rub the makeup down so you look like things look weird. And then do some dry heaves. Boom, you got her.

[Chris Cote]

This is an all timer for you, David. No, my mouth is on the floor right now.

[Stugotz]

You give them some green makeup, they can put this a little bit on your cheeks here. People are going to wonder. You look a little sick.

[Chris Cote]

You're teaching your child to lie about being sick so you don't have to sit through a recital.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's I. But I would tell her that that's what we're doing. I actually didn't mind teaching my kids the difference between a malicious lie, a white lie, or when you want to mislead people or when you want to get what you want. How to get what you want. And they're all successful kids right now, so that part of it worked. But I'll tell you, we weren't hurting anyone. Chris. There's no. They're backstage. They're not even watching the other people dance. They can't see them. So what is the purpose of being there?

[Stugotz]

The teachers don't want them there. Also, like, they are just as miserable as everyone else because it's like I now have to watch these kids for seven hours after a four minute performance just because these are the rules that this company decided with. They'd be more than happy to have your kids get out of there. They don't want to babysit 15 kids all day.

[Dan Le Batard]

And by the way, you have to bring every kid flowers. And so they sell flowers in the lobby.

[Billy Corben]

It's a racket.

[Stugotz]

Then you have to hug them. It's just the worst.

[Chris Cote]

You got to bring your own flowers. Those.

[Stugotz]

I'm with you on the a great job and like those flowers dance better.

[Billy Corben]

No, but there's a guy who sets up shop at all these dance recitals.

[Chris Cote]

Yeah, I don't buy those flowers. I get my. I bring my own flowers.

[Billy Corben]

Price gouging. I'm telling you, they over overcharge for those for sure. Because once you get there, no, damn, once you get there, if you don't have flowers, you are forced to buy flowers from this person.

[David Sampson]

A guy who sets up shops, usually.

[Chris Cote]

Someone who works for the thing. It's like all one.

[Stugotz]

They pretend they don't, but you know they're in on it.

[David Sampson]

Thanksgiving is a time of love and song and dance and community. Will you listen to yourselves?

[Billy Corben]

It's a time for trades.

[David Sampson]

Listen to yourself.

[Greg Cody]

It's a time for trades.

[Dan Le Batard]

Hot stove.

[Mike Ryan]

Literally.

[Greg Cody]

David Sampson, I asked you for an.

[David Sampson]

Adjective to describe yourself as a father.

[Greg Cody]

And you gave me a whole mealy.

[David Sampson]

Mouth, discussion and description without giving me an adjective. Did you think you were a bad father?

[Dan Le Batard]

Adequate.

[David Sampson]

Because you weren't present. And you're saying you couldn't choose fatherhood over business?

[Dan Le Batard]

No, I'm just saying that my kids look back and say that, you know, it's funny, they always say this and I think it comes from their therapist or whatever. Hey, I wish you had given it all up and spent more time with us. I'm like, all right, enjoy. 86F, right on the flight to Wisconsin. I just don't buy any of that at all. But I love them and they like me fine when they need something.

[David Sampson]

Okay, but you just. Look, you just said. And I don't want to argue with this about you, but I don't want to argue with you about this. But you said they're successful. And you. And you're also talking about how it is that somebody.

[Mike Ryan]

What he's so detached from what coach is that he thinks there's 86 rows. He's never gotten out of the single digits.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's. You're wrong.

[Greg Cody]

International giant jumbo jets that are flying privately.

[Dan Le Batard]

I was in row 86 on the way to the Philippines for Survivor and.

[David Sampson]

I couldn't stand it.

[Dan Le Batard]

And so I upgraded. It's on air Philippines in 2013. And I upgraded myself on the plane. And much to the chagrin of the fellow survivors, I didn't realize at the time, but they ended up holding that against me that I wasn't willing to sit in a middle seat surrounded by like babies for a 14 hour flight.

[Billy Corben]

You became the target.

[Greg Cody]

You have no people skills. I wonder why they kicked you off the island so quickly. You don't understand community.

[Stugotz]

You're about to go on a stranded island for 39 days like Jeff. I'd like to upgrade, please. What do we. What. How much do I have to give you for a 10 out here for me and my.

[Greg Cody]

You thought you were gonna win and you lost. You lost on the plane right over. You lost. He thinks he's smarter than everyone else and he lost the whole thing on the plane. They hated him.

[Dan Le Batard]

As soon as they landed, I was totally rested. I felt great. I was lying down the whole flight. Meanwhile, the rest of the people are sitting like this for 14 hours.

[David Sampson]

All right, Samson, I'm going to get your movie review in a second, but Mike Ryan, did you finish the coffee? The coffee table?

[Mike Ryan]

I did the most uncomfortable movie I've ever seen by quite a distance. Just. Yeah, it's incredible. I think it's a masterpiece. But also. So researching this movie comes with a trigger warning. So when I say it's the darkest, most uncomfortable thing that you can imagine, also probably a dark comedy as well. You can view it through that prism. Certainly. I've never really seen anything like it. It's shocking. It's provocative, it's brilliant. Yeah, I love the movie in retrospect, but it was tough to get through and my wife checked out on it in the process. She couldn't make it through it.

[Billy Corben]

You brought it up to me on Monday. You told me about it. I was scared just hearing about it. But people on social media were tweeting you saying they can't the movie.

[Mike Ryan]

There's been a lot of people that have told me that they've tried to watch it and they bail on it. Or they research the Wikipedia and they bail on it. I totally understand that. But I think, and I know David isn't a big horror guy, although I've come to find out that's more of your traditional slasher terrifier type stuff. But I'd venture to say because we've had this conversation a couple weeks ago, there's a real horror movie suspense thriller renaissance going on right now. And I think there's actual reasons for that. If you see what the big studios are green lighting, it's got to have intellectual property. It's got to be big. They got to meet their margins on this. So you get these really, really resourceful filmmakers really pushing boundaries on smaller budgets. And for whatever reason, to me, the genre right now that is getting the most original stuff out there is this genre. I've seen like seven in the last few weeks and each one gets better than the previous one. The substance was actually one of these and traditionally I was worried to tell David about that because it's kind of gory, visceral in certain instances, but it's also a bit of a comedy. So I put it on David's radar and he actually saw this. What'd you think of this movie? The substance?

[Dan Le Batard]

I thought the substance was outstanding. I reviewed it on a recent. Nothing personal. Let me give you a two minute review of that. That it's not a horror movie. So I'm curious what genre. You're right. It's the Jump R and the slasher that I won't watch. The substance being gory. It's a. But that's not. The substance is about aging and it's about our view of our looks and Demi Moore basically not wanting to be old anymore because there's a man who's in charge, Dennis Quaid, who says, you're too old to be on tv. So she says, hey, I'll be young again. And all of a sudden out comes Margaret Qualley in one of the great birthing scenes this side of she's having a baby. It is a movie that is well worth watching, and it's well worth watching with people in your life because it will lead to a good discussion about what you would do to continue to look young.

[David Sampson]

I'd be curious if Sampson would like that kind of movie. Sampson loves stuff that makes him feel. Anything that makes him feel. But this uncomfortable. What would you describe as the most uncomfortable? You've been watching a movie, David?

[Dan Le Batard]

I was uncomfortable watching Seven.

[Billy Corben]

Were you?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah. That is probably my number one least comfortable watch, because I'm generally scared anyway. And I just was thinking about all the different ways that bad things can happen and then the end of that movie, which is not a spoiler alert anymore, I don't believe. I don't know the rules on that.

[Mike Ryan]

You're good there.

[Chris Cote]

It's in the box.

[Dan Le Batard]

When there's a head and a butt, you're just thinking, wow, I don't want to watch this. I was very uncomfortable.

[Mike Ryan]

We'll say that that 7 is basically space jam compared to the coffee table.

[Dan Le Batard]

Is it really? Yeah.

[Billy Corben]

Get out of here.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah. It's the darkest premise you can imagine.

[Chris Cote]

I'm telling you. Mike told me about it. Cause I don't watch a lot of stuff. So I was like, go ahead, just give it to me.

[Dan Le Batard]

And I.

[Chris Cote]

It's the only movie I've never seen that I can't stop thinking about.

[Dan Le Batard]

So I don't even know what it's about, Mike, but I'm gonna watch it.

[David Sampson]

Mike hasn't told us where it's available. Mike hasn't told us what it's about. And at least in part, I haven't gone searching for it because I don't want to know.

[Billy Corben]

He told me. And you don't want to know. I mean, I'm serious.

[Greg Cody]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

I think part of the experience is the shock value, too. I didn't. I knew that it was uncomfortable because I had heard enough people talk about this, but every time they talked about it, they didn't really give any plot lines to it. And I really appreciated that because it definitely shocks you.

[David Sampson]

All right, so this was the recommendation of Anthony Jeselnik on South Beach Sessions. He's a dark comedian, and he thought it was a dark comedy. I wanted to ask you about what one of the Farrelly brothers is doing. It seems like the Coen brothers and the Farrelly brothers are not working. Working together anymore. And what are the Farrelly brothers doing? Or what is. Is it Peter?

[Mike Ryan]

I think it's Peter that's working on this.

[David Sampson]

He's Doing stagach your wheelhouse. He's doing something Rocky related.

[Billy Corben]

Ah, yes.

[Mike Ryan]

So it turns out that the big underdog story that surrounds Rocky was Sylvester Stallone getting this film made. And the script that he just picked up that he says is brilliant is the making of Rocky and Sylvester Stallone's insistence that he not only write, direct, and star in this film and the studio, like Sylvester Stallone was acting in softcore porn movies. He was basically unhoused at this time. And the studio gives them all sorts of impossible deadlines and budgets because they don't want him to be the star of the film. They pegged another big Hollywood actor to be the star of the film. And there are details, like in the scene, they get all the running scenes out in one day, and Sylvester stallone essentially runs 18 miles in one day. And he gets hospitalized. The scene where he's punching the ribs, that was actually frozen meat. They didn't have time to defrost it. Sylvester Stallone breaks his hands and it's about persevering, making his life different, getting himself out of that spot while using this underdog as an avatar. The big underdog story is Sylvester Stallone.

[Billy Corben]

The guy who was going to play Rocky was Burt Reynolds. I mean, think about that. Imagine that. What a different movie. Burt Reynolds playing Rocky. Yeah.

[David Sampson]

So the making of Rocky is a better underdog story than Rocky.

[Mike Ryan]

I think there are a lot of movies, and David probably knows this. Where I want to find out more about the making of the movie than watch the actual movie. Rocky is one of them. Michael Mann's Miami Vice is one of them. And Face off, when Nicolas Cage and John Travolta spent three days together in a cabin trying to get each other's movements and motions and way of being. That's a great movie.

[David Sampson]

David, what is your review for the week?

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm doing this, and I have this rehearsed, so forgive me. I don't normally use notes. Hi, Mike, this is David Sampson. I watched your show called the man on the Inside. I watched it in one sitting, which doesn't make it like a regular television show. It makes it more like a movie, as you stated. I felt something every single episode. Putting together Ted Danson and the rest of that tremendous cast and a story that really touches home to an aging population, people trying to continue to find their relevance and their place as they become less relevant in the workforce and with their families, you managed to weave together a story that will enthrall people and capture people from episode one to the finale. Which I can't believe opens us up to the possibility of a season two. And if anybody is smart, which I assume all the streamers are, given your track record, Mike, that show is going to be picked up, and your creative juices are going to have to continue flowing. I have no way to give you this review directly because I would have liked to. I asked Dan and Pablo if I could reach out to you, and they both said, absolutely not. You had no interest in hearing from me because for whatever reason you think we've met. That said, I have to give credit where credit is due. And you are a singular talent in the ability to create, including directing the final episode, a show that will capture the hearts, minds, and imaginations of what I hope will be millions of people. It's called the man on the Inside.

[Mike Ryan]

Well, thank you for those kind words.

[David Sampson]

You should have said Mike Schur, that you were directing it toward Mike Schur so that people would have understood what you were about.

[Chris Cote]

Halfway through, I was like, oh, I know.

[Mike Ryan]

So it's a passion project.

[David Sampson]

So here's the backstory on this. David Sampson is legitimately bothered and hurt that Mike Schur will not interact with him and Billy. Do you have any thoughts here on how deserved it? Is that because Samson. Just saying. Why don't we just all get along? You've never met me.

[Stugotz]

I mean, if Mike sure doesn't want to talk to someone, I don't know that it's your place to be giving out his number. I don't know how this works.

[David Sampson]

Samson keeps wanting me to pass along his praise, and so I do pass it along. But when he wants to talk to Mike, sure. Mike sure doesn't want to talk to him. And then I relay that message back. What am I supposed to do? I've told Sampson before. He's an adult. I can't force him to talk to you.

[Dan Le Batard]

And I'm not set with you. Dan, I appreciate you trying. I just don't understand. I. You know, Mike Schur, if he wants to talk to Ariel Helwani or Billy Corbin or other people who, before they met me, had a problem with me, and then they met me, we spent time together, and everything ended up being fine. Mike's just not willing to do that. And the fact is that I am in contact and know people who also know Mike and who like Mike and also like me, you'd think the transit of property. He'd give me at least a minute, and I understand he's busy, but I could talk art, I could talk sports, I could Talk finance. I could talk movies. I'm just interested in also complimenting people when they do great jobs. And Mike doesn't make anything bad and I just want him to know it. And I thought we were all on the same team, but quite obviously he still doesn't feel that way. But it doesn't stop me or in any way prejudice my review of his stuff because so many people do that that they use a personal issue in terms of a professional result. And I would never let that happen.

[Billy Corben]

You're trying too hard, David. Just let it happen. Like, stop talking about wanting to talk to Mike. Meeting. You're just starting. I'm telling you, just let it happen naturally. Eventually you'll meet him. It's all to play hard to get. Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

I have a feeler out, actually, that I think I have a way in.

[Billy Corben]

Are you stalking?

[Stugotz]

What does that mean?

[Dan Le Batard]

No, no, that's gross. I do not stalk.

[Mike Ryan]

If I could.

[Dan Le Batard]

And I'm not desperate. I don't even want money from. I don't even want a lot of time from him. I simply want a text response too much.

[Stugotz]

You're. You're not desperate. You don't stock those too far. You get those George Michael glasses. So you can put on the same glasses George Michael wore or what?

[Dan Le Batard]

I did get those, Billy. Did you get them arrived yet from England, but you just. You didn't ruin it. But I will do this show wearing the George Michael.

[David Sampson]

You're going to wear them. You were going to unveil them in.

[Greg Cody]

A week or two, correct?

[David Sampson]

You ruined your surprise.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yes, he did.

[Stugotz]

Did you get the license plate?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yes, I did.

[David Sampson]

You get everything?

[Dan Le Batard]

And I may have gotten one other thing, Billy. I may have gotten Elton John sunglasses.

[Billy Corben]

Maybe.

[David Sampson]

Being a bad father was all worth it in the end. Thank you, David.

[Billy Corben]

An absence Elton John glass.

[Greg Cody]

Because you can buy the trinkets of famous people. It's okay that you were never around for the kids. Kids. It's okay that you're lonely late in life and that Thanksgiving is something you hate and you make up trades in order to avoid.

[Stugotz]

He's not lonely in this collection of sunglasses.

[Greg Cody]

At least at the very end. When you work toward the very end, you have the trinkets of Elton John and George Michael to show.

[Mike Ryan]

Set them around the Thanksgiving table.

[Chris Cote]

Hello, Elton.

[Mike Ryan]

Provided that you're only there from 402 to 527.

[Dan Le Batard]

I've done it. All right.

[Greg Cody]

And God forbid that somebody does an end zone celebration Trump dance at a Thanksgiving dinner near you.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm sure got the remote in hand.

[Greg Cody]

See you later. See you later, Samson.

[David Sampson]

I don't know what to do about that. His podcast is nothing personal. He wants to talk to Mike.

[Billy Corben]

Sure.

[Greg Cody]

I can only ask so many times.

[David Sampson]

Like, I can't Mike. Mike sure is being stubborn.

[Greg Cody]

Doesn't want to be friends with David.

[Billy Corben]

You're doing a thing, aren't you? That thing that you do where you're.

[Chris Cote]

Acting like you're trying to help but you really want to separate.

[Greg Cody]

No, no, Samson, keep. No, Samson keeps telling me send him my regards. And I have to force my regards over there. And then sure is like, I don't want to talk to him anymore. Like, what do you want me to do?

[Dan Le Batard]

I've never said send regards. I've always had a purpose for the communication. Not like, hey, how's your day going?

[Billy Corben]

Trying too hard.