Hour 1: So...Do You Hedge?

Summary

The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz – Episode Summary: "Hour 1: So...Do You Hedge?"

Release Date: March 26, 2025

Introduction and Light Banter

The episode kicks off with the familiar banter between hosts Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, and Amin Elhassan. The conversation quickly delves into playful teasing and internal jokes, setting a lively and engaging tone for the show.

Department of Defense (DoD) and AI-Related Errors

A significant portion of the discussion centers around recent mishaps involving the Department of Defense and artificial intelligence. Amin Elhassan raises concerns about AI's role in altering historical records, citing incidents where the term "Enola Gay" was temporarily removed due to the word "gay," and questions the impact of AI on preserving human history.

Amin Elhassan (04:11): "Are you at all confused? Confused and scared that artificial intelligence is literally trying to erase humanity with these stories?"

Dan Le Batard counters by emphasizing that human error, rather than AI, is primarily responsible for these issues.

Dan Le Batard (04:23): "It's not artificial intelligence doing it. People are using AI tools, but humans are behind it."

Robert Griffin III (RG3) and Race in Sports Media

The hosts delve into RG3's recent appearance on Stephen A. Smith's show, where RG3 expressed frustration over being criticized for not being "black enough." Amin Elhassan explores the broader implications of such remarks, highlighting the challenges faced by Black athletes who navigate identity within predominantly white and Black spaces.

Amin Elhassan (06:03): "RG3 brought the perspective of I wanted to be talking about sports, not whether I'm black enough."

Stugotz and Billy Corben discuss RG3's defensive statements and the convoluted nature of his apology, criticizing his approach to addressing the controversy.

Wheelhouse Segment: Patrick Ewing vs. Jimmy Butler

The "Wheelhouse" segment features a spirited debate comparing legendary NBA players Patrick Ewing and Jimmy Butler. The hosts engage in a series of rapid-fire questions testing their knowledge of Ewing's career and personal background.

Amin Elhassan (09:08): "Can you please tell me what a wheelhouse is? I don't even know what an actual wheelhouse is."

Despite their best efforts, the hosts humorously fail to answer several questions correctly, leading to playful ribbing and laughter.

Critique of "Stat of the Day"

Amin introduces the topic of the "Stat of the Day," sponsored by Miller Lite, critiquing it for being uninspired and lacking depth. The hosts agree that the segment's recent example was particularly underwhelming.

Amin Elhassan (17:28): "The stat of the day is meant to resonate historically... that was not great."

Parlay Bet and Hedging Strategies

The conversation transitions to a complex parlay bet placed by Amin, involving multiple sporting events with a potential payout of $168,000 from a $5 wager. Amin seeks advice on hedging strategies, questioning how to mitigate risk in such high-stakes betting.

Amin Elhassan (25:02): "So it's $168,000 on a $5 bet. And what I wanted to ask you guys is what is the correct way to hedge that?"

The hosts propose various strategies, from taking cash out early to making additional bets on opposing outcomes. Billy Corben suggests that the small initial investment mitigates potential losses, while Stugotz emphasizes the importance of understanding the mathematics behind hedging.

Billy Corben (29:48): "But that's... you lost 50,000 bucks. You didn't lose five bucks. The worst case is you lost 50."

Duke University's Portrayal in "The White Lotus"

Dan Le Batard brings attention to Duke University's dissatisfaction with its portrayal in the latest episode of "The White Lotus." The university objected to the unauthorized use of their trademark and the negative imagery associated with it, which they feel misrepresents their values.

Dan Le Batard (32:02): "Duke was not happy with the usage of their trademark in the most recent episode of The White Lotus."

The hosts speculate on who within Duke University might be the focal point of Mike White's (creator of "The White Lotus") discontent, discussing notable figures like Christian Laettner and JJ Redick.

Final Thoughts and Wrap-Up

As the episode draws to a close, the hosts continue their lighthearted discussions, touching on various topics from sports rivalries to media portrayals. The episode concludes with a blend of humor and insightful commentary, leaving listeners both entertained and informed.

Notable Quotes and Timestamps

• Amin Elhassan (04:11): "Are you at all confused? Confused and scared that artificial intelligence is literally trying to erase humanity with these stories?"

• Dan Le Batard (04:23): "It's not artificial intelligence doing it. People are using AI tools, but humans are behind it."

• Amin Elhassan (06:03): "RG3 brought the perspective of I wanted to be talking about sports, not whether I'm black enough."

• Amin Elhassan (09:08): "Can you please tell me what a wheelhouse is? I don't even know what an actual wheelhouse is."

• Amin Elhassan (17:28): "The stat of the day is meant to resonate historically... that was not great."

• Amin Elhassan (25:02): "So it's $168,000 on a $5 bet. And what I wanted to ask you guys is what is the correct way to hedge that?"

• Billy Corben (29:48): "But that's... you lost 50,000 bucks. You didn't lose five bucks. The worst case is you lost 50."

• Dan Le Batard (32:02): "Duke was not happy with the usage of their trademark in the most recent episode of The White Lotus."

Conclusion

In "Hour 1: So...Do You Hedge?", Dan Le Batard and his co-hosts navigate a range of topics from AI-induced errors in the Department of Defense records to the complexities of race in sports media, culminating in an entertaining yet thought-provoking discussion. Their engaging banter, coupled with incisive insights, provides a comprehensive and enjoyable listening experience for both longtime fans and newcomers alike.

Transcript

[Dan Le Batard]

You're listening to Giraffe Kings Network.

[Stugotz]

Some people just know they could save.

[Amin Elhassan]

Hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate First. Like you know to check the Jumbotron first before attempting to eat a stack of supreme nachos in one bite.

[Stugotz]

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[Amin Elhassan]

Shares on game day.

[Stugotz]

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[Amin Elhassan]

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[Stugotz]

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[Amin Elhassan]

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[David Sampson]

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[Jessica]

This is the Dan Levator show with the ST Podcast.

[Amin Elhassan]

I don't know what Amin is doing. He's smiling. There have been three times during the show today that I'm pretty sure Amin is laughing at things that don't have much of anything to do with what we're doing on the show. I think just now I don't know what to do with this Jessica because we've been doing two hours of show unevenly and Amin said right before we turned on the microphones, as I was headed toward other subject matter, we buried the lead on the Jimmy Butler thing. Yeah, like I know, but Jessica, what am I supposed to do with this? Like what am I supposed to do?

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean you already lost your bet, so stakes on you. Second of all, very dangerous game when you call someone out for laughing off air and then they have to think of something to say. Just happened in the last time I didn't want to say what I was was thinking. I made something up. I don't even know what I said. Just did it to a mean Tell us why you're laughing Jessica. Cuz I sent him a funny Sesame Street Jessica tweet. That's why.

[Billy Corben]

Sunny Days, Sesame Street.

[Dan Le Batard]

It was a funny one, right?

[Stugotz]

I mean it was hilarious.

[Amin Elhassan]

Jessica.

[Dan Le Batard]

So Grover had this like hilarious fake mustache and a hat on and I said that's you.

[Amin Elhassan]

I wanted Jessica Akbar.

[Dan Le Batard]

You're right, that's Akbar.

[Amin Elhassan]

So badly in the last hour to have the words that you were saying to Billy behind a hand while laughing because you didn't Want the cameras to catch whatever it is that you were saying, Billy, I wanted those words for about 35 minutes.

[Stugotz]

What did I say to you, Billy?

[Jessica]

I don't know. What did you say to me?

[Billy Corben]

But it was like a mouth visit.

[Amin Elhassan]

It was like LeBron and Wade. She was hiding. I was in the middle of talking, and she was laughing and hiding her hand from me and the audience.

[Dan Le Batard]

And I try not to be distracting.

[Amin Elhassan]

I've wanted those words for 35 minutes.

[Jessica]

It is allergy season. Maybe she had to sneeze.

[Amin Elhassan]

No, it was pretty clear she was just laughing with you on a Wild Willie Wednesday.

[Tony]

Me.

[Amin Elhassan]

That's right. There are two serious things that I actually wanted to get to with Amin that we have not gotten to. The Cain Velasquez story is something that I wanted to get to. And before we got to that, I wanted to talk for a second because I did think that something interesting actually ended up springing from all of this. That Jackie Robinson Defense Department stupidity from last week. Whether it comes to the. Do any of you find yourself alarmed that when it comes to artificial intelligence, the stories you get are about the Enola Gay being removed from the record books temporarily because a World War II bomber from Hiroshima had the word gay in it, and Jackie Robbins history has obviously black in it. Are you at all confused? Confused and scared that artificial intelligence is literally trying to erase humanity with these stories that are.

[Stugotz]

That are.

[Amin Elhassan]

That are coming out about stupidities? Because you've got artificial intelligence handling how it is that things are seen as equal.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's not artificial intelligence doing it. Like they're using people are using an AI tool to scrape things from websites, but it's people that are behind it. And also what I'm scared about is that's the second worst thing that's happened around the DoD in this past week. Like, there is a. Another ginormous scandal unfolding.

[Stugotz]

That one ain't A.I.

[Amin Elhassan]

That'S correct. That's human error.

[Stugotz]

Human error.

[Amin Elhassan]

Inordinate, inordinate stupidities where war. War plans are being sent accidentally to the wrong journalists.

[Stugotz]

Not just to the wrong person. To a journalist.

[Amin Elhassan]

Right.

[Stugotz]

Like, of all the people, like, not my nanny. Not like.

[Jeremy]

Was it Adam?

[Stugotz]

They said. Yeah, Adam Schefter. Right.

[Amin Elhassan]

Not wrong Adam. Adam Lichtenster. Adam from the Sun Sentinel, star of Oddball.

[Stugotz]

Oh, there you go.

[Dan Le Batard]

How would a me know who that is?

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, Akbar met him.

[Amin Elhassan]

I wanted to bring David Sampson back because I wanted to do a Patrick. I didn't even get to the real parts of these two stories.

[Stugotz]

We'll get back to it. We'll get back to it. We'll get back to.

[Amin Elhassan]

No, because it's one of the things that sprung from the Jackie Robinson. Just sheer stupidity. You can't even do funny with it. It's just so dumb. Is that RG3 is going on Stephen A. Smith's show. This is after RG3. You know, he was trying to make the rounds recently. He reached out to Jamel, reached out to our show. There was something that he wanted to correct because when it came to Jackie Robinson, he had tweeted out, I just miss when sports shows were about sports. And he went on Stephen A. Smith's show and he explained something that I had not considered when I saw that as people turned RG3 into whatever it is that they are willing to say when they say he's not black enough. RG3 came out and was hurt and was viewing it through the narcissistic eyes of. I want sports shows to be sports shows because when they used to talk about me on first take, Rob Parker was calling me a cornball brother. And it was a black guy saying another black guy wasn't quite black enough for his taste. And I've been that since I had never heard it before and I've been that since for people because I've married a white woman and because. Because of whatever you think of my politics that makes Stephen A comfortable enough to say on his show, hey, nobody at ESPN liked you, RG3. I liked you saying Stephen A. Smith, but no one there liked you because you were somebody who didn't fit. And so RG3 brought the perspective of I wanted to be talking about sports, not whether I'm black enough. This is something that I run into a lot with certain black athlete friends of mine where they're too white for black people and too black for white people. And so they find this space where all of a sudden that's what they're talking about on first take. And RG3 has to represent a certain kind of black.

[Stugotz]

Yeah. For what it's worth, RG3's defense, as I heard it, not on the show, but behind the scenes, as someone who got reached out to, is that his comment had nothing to do with Mina. It was. He didn't even know Mina had said that or gone on the show.

[Amin Elhassan]

Okay.

[Stugotz]

But because he didn't. I'm just telling you, I'm not. Don't shoot the message.

[Jeremy]

Don't shoot the message. You gu.

[Billy Corben]

I'm not doing that to you. I'm Divisively doing that to RG3.

[Stugotz]

But basically he's saying that it was said not according to what Mina was talking about. It just happened simultaneously. He had the worst timing ever. To which I responded to an intermediary that why didn't you immediately just say, hey, by the way, I see a lot of people saying connecting me to this. I'm not. And then I got sent what his correction was and it was as convoluted as anything I've ever seen. But I kind of saw the seeds of him trying to say, oh, it wasn't about me to. But he said it in such a convoluted way that it didn't really land.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah. It's just unsurprising. Right. Like that's RG3 is one of several people in the sort of sports media landscape who will just say anything for clicks.

[Amin Elhassan]

Right.

[Billy Corben]

I mean, that's what that was. That's putting something out there at a time when the topic was the topic du jour. And he knew that that would be divisive. And not only knew it would be divisive, he knew the specific audience that he was attracting with it.

[Stugotz]

I would say, Jeremy, the only thing I would say is I'm willing to accept that he didn't know that she said that and had no idea. But once he saw the fervor and furor, instead of like, let it sit there on purpose. Let it.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, that's fair.

[Stugotz]

Absolutely. Cuz it's pretty easy to me if I was talking about something and someone's oh, you said that about Dan Lebatar. I'm like, oh, no. I didn't even hear what Dan said. I would go immediately and correct.

[Billy Corben]

It was 24 hours. He let that sit there.

[Stugotz]

Ye. So you know, it is what it is.

[Amin Elhassan]

David Sampson, I never got to the Patrick Ewing off with you and Amin. And I meant to. Are you ready to do that now? I'm going to. You say it's your wheelhouse. Amin says he's got a better wheelhouse than your wheelhouse. Can you please tell me what a wheelhouse is? I don't even know what an actual wheelhouse is.

[Stugotz]

House of wheels.

[Amin Elhassan]

Put it on the poll at Lebatard show. Do you know what a wheelhouse has.

[Jessica]

To do with boating?

[Stugotz]

I would assume wheel buses.

[Amin Elhassan]

I don't know. Do any of you know what a wheelhouse is?

[Billy Corben]

According to artificial intelligence on Google, it says that in your wheelhouse originates from the nautical term for small enclosed area on a ship where the captain steers. So score One for Billy A.

[Amin Elhassan]

Seaman.

[Jessica]

Dan.

[Jeremy]

David raised for him, by the way. Dan.

[Stugotz]

Only if it makes it. Only if it makes it all the way. Get to the end zone, then, yes, There's.

[Amin Elhassan]

I. I think two for two. It's a great.

[Jeremy]

We need the third one, though. That's where the money comes.

[Stugotz]

Red zone conversion.

[Amin Elhassan]

Billy, the way that you describe being married, where you have to go to a NASCAR race in order to get a piece of quiet.

[Jessica]

That was a private conversation. I just said I got some peace and quiet over the weekend. You said where? I said at home. Said Miami Speedway during the NASCAR race. The loudest place to have some quiet time.

[Stugotz]

You're gonna learn not to tell Dan things.

[Jessica]

Just, you know, a moment that I was sitting there in the grandstand and I thought, man, I could just think here if it wasn't so damn loud. But this is also the quietest it's been in a long time. Anyways, David, if I were to tell you, guess which sports a young Patrick Ewing excelled at as a child, which sports would you say?

[Tony]

I have no idea. I would say that it seems hard to imagine that he was late to basketball, but I guess it's possible, so I would assume it's not tennis.

[Stugotz]

Can I steal?

[Jessica]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

Okay, so he was late to basketball because he emigrated here from Jamaica. So he played soccer and volleyball.

[Jessica]

You got one of the two. He played soccer and cricket.

[Stugotz]

Cricket. Cricket.

[Billy Corben]

Huge.

[Jeremy]

In Jamaica.

[Tony]

That's a wheelhouse. I mean, right there. Knowing what he did in Jamaica.

[Stugotz]

Okay, guess what, man? When you like the sport, you know everything. You know, just. Oh, I know for the seven years.

[Amin Elhassan]

You know half the things. Because you got volleyball wrong.

[Billy Corben]

So, you know, I mean, your question. Did Patrick Ewing win rookie of the Year?

[Stugotz]

He sure did.

[Billy Corben]

David, please spell Patrick Ewing's middle name A.

[Tony]

Is it a L? A N?

[Billy Corben]

It does start, Al. That's close.

[Stugotz]

What is it, Alistair?

[Billy Corben]

It's a L. O, Y, S, I.

[Amin Elhassan]

Us.

[Stugotz]

Aloysius.

[Billy Corben]

Aloysius.

[Amin Elhassan]

So, so far, our wheelhouse guys have gotten just about everything wrong. Like, when a meme tries to steal it, he steals it incorrectly.

[Stugotz]

Well, close enough. Closer than David.

[Jessica]

And David thinks his name's Alan, but other than that, we're close.

[Tony]

I was just looking over at the signed pair of game you sneakers I have, and he doesn't spell out his name.

[Jessica]

All right, here's a question.

[Tony]

He does sign it with C33.

[Jessica]

Okay, here's a question. What size sneaker does David Sampson own? Autographed by Patrick Ewing.

[Tony]

I mean, do you know his foot size? So there's a funny thing about this story. Patrick Ewing does not have large feet at all. And I would. I would assume, as I'm looking, it's probably only a 12 to a 13, and that's it.

[Stugotz]

Patrick, you wears 13s. Yes. It's up to you to confirm.

[Jessica]

David has the shoes. You can see, I don't know the size. It says 15 here, but that doesn't sound right compared to what you guys are saying.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, small feet.

[Amin Elhassan]

You guys are getting everything wrong.

[Stugotz]

Because I'm not a. Look, it's not a.

[Amin Elhassan]

You said. You guys said. You guys said. David, how do you not know the size of the shoes that you've purchased that are in your house? How could you get that wrong?

[Tony]

I literally could care less how big his foot is. I have the shoes because of the meaning of those shoes in my life, not the fact that they're a 12 or a 15 or a 20. I have Shaq shoes because I can live in them. And those are like a 24. I mean, and those are just shocking. They're so heavy to even lift. Patrick, Shoes are just normal.

[Stugotz]

I worked with the guy. I know.

[Jessica]

Okay, so next question. Amin, what do those shoes mean to David Sampson?

[Stugotz]

The world is that for David.

[Amin Elhassan]

You worked with him, is what you said of Shaq. You're in the tank for Shaq.

[Stugotz]

I'm not in the tank. I work with the guy.

[Jeremy]

That's his guy, though. He showed up to the funeral.

[Jessica]

Do we believe that. That Shaq forgot that he bought a car and it just showed up at his house?

[Stugotz]

And they're cameras. There are cameras.

[Jessica]

Exactly. Right? Like, that was. I. That was a lot. Why does he do these things? You know, Shaq. Why does Shaq do these things?

[Stugotz]

Because he thinks it's funny. Because he thinks it's funny. Like, it's. I'll be honest with you. Like. And by the way, 90% of the stuff doesn't make it out for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is, you can't do that one, big fella. I'm gonna tell you right now, you can't do that. I'll tell a story. Remember when he called Chris Bosh the RuPaul of big men? You guys remember that one?

[Amin Elhassan]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

So what happened was Shaq caught the ball and made a legal basketball move. And Chris Bosh over. Over exaggerated the reaction. Refs, toss him flagrant two. You're out. Right. And this is before they could review these things. So Shaq comes to the back and sits in. In with us. In the video room. And he's literally workshopping all the things he's going to say about Chris Bosh at the end. And we're like, big fell. You can't say that one. No, you can't. You cannot say that. That's not so. Then it was like, what if I say he's the RuPaul of big men? And we all looked around the room, we're like, I think that's just on this side of acceptable.

[Billy Corben]

This is why DEI should exist in.

[Amin Elhassan]

All over the towing along.

[Jeremy]

Amin was there. What do you mean, DEI Amin was there.

[Billy Corben]

I can think of some other voices that might not have loved RuPaul.

[Amin Elhassan]

O'Bingham.

[Stugotz]

It doesn't really mean anything.

[Billy Corben]

Does it not?

[Stugotz]

And yet it means everything, right?

[Billy Corben]

It does.

[Stugotz]

That's why it tells the line.

[Amin Elhassan]

I would side with Jeremy on this.

[Billy Corben]

One, not Kevin Durant. Toe on the line.

[Amin Elhassan]

Not surprised, though. We're too woke.

[Jessica]

In 1984 at the Olympics when Patrick Ewing was one of the players for Team USA to win the gold medal, what jersey number did he wear?

[Stugotz]

I'll give it to you, David. I think I know which one, but go ahead.

[Tony]

My best guess would be six.

[Stugotz]

Me, too. Six.

[Jessica]

It was number six.

[Amin Elhassan]

The wheelhouse, ladies and gentlemen. That includes the wheelhouse. Thank you, David. Thank you, David.

[Stugotz]

David, one last thing for the wheelhouse. Patrick, you only went to as many NBA finals as Jimmy Butler. You still throw that out there.

[Tony]

Oh, wait, tell me the same number of rings.

[Amin Elhassan]

That's not correct.

[Stugotz]

What do you mean?

[Amin Elhassan]

Is that correct?

[Stugotz]

Yes, they went to the same number. You know what?

[Jeremy]

It's his wheelhouse down.

[Stugotz]

And you know what? Hold on. Let me give you another one. Jimmy Butler played more NBA Finals games than Patrick Ewing did. You know why? Because Patrick Ewing didn't play in them second finals. He was sitting nursing a wrist. That injury by who was the guy that hurt him and what city?

[Tony]

It was 1999 and I don't remember. I mean, I just know that it was a nightmare that he couldn't play. That was when I believe we beat the Heat as an eight seed that year. That was the Allen Houston shot in Miami game five. But 1994 was when Jordan was retired and we got seven. He got seven finals games. So he's played a total of seven finals games. Two. Two finals, no rings.

[Stugotz]

Yes. The other finals he didn't play, Dan, was because he was hurt. They lost to the spurs in five games, but Jimmy Butler played in his five games. I also want to throw out real quick, David. Yeah, they Beat the heat in the first round. 3, 2. Who'd they play in the second round that year?

[Tony]

They played the Pacers in the third round. The second round would have been. Could have been the Hawks.

[Stugotz]

Yes. And what was the season?

[Tony]

The series we would have gotten that. It didn't go seven, so I'm going to say six.

[Stugotz]

Sorry, it was a sweep. Go ahead. Go back to your little wheelhouse.

[Amin Elhassan]

Okay. No, you guys stink at wheelhouse.

[Billy Corben]

I don't know. That was pretty good to be an ex.

[Amin Elhassan]

No, but he's picking the facts that he knows and we asked them questions and they got them all wrong. Thank you, David, for being on with us. And bravo, David, showing off of your expertise. Before the end of the show, I want this bet with Jessica, but in the meantime, we've got a stat of the day involving Jimmy Butler. Start of the day.

[Jessica]

Start of the day.

[Amin Elhassan]

It is the start of the day. Start of the day.

[Jessica]

Start of the day. It is the start of the day.

[Amin Elhassan]

Start of the day.

[Jessica]

Start of the day. It is the start of the day.

[Amin Elhassan]

Start of the day. Start of the day. It is the start of the day.

[David Sampson]

Stat of the day is presented by Miller Lite.

[Billy Corben]

In his triumphant return to Miami, Jimmy Butler was outscored by both Davion Mitchell and Alec Burks as the warriors scored the second fewest points they've scored in a game this season.

[Stugotz]

The laziest stat of the day ever. The laziest stat of the day ever. What would you have preferred amin a stat of day? That was actually insightful.

[Amin Elhassan]

You've cheapened the stat of the day. The stat of the day is to be respected, and it's almost always great. That was not great. That. That just stunk as a stat of the day. The stat of the day is meant to resonate historically, like it's meant to be something you remember and maybe tell your friends later.

[Stugotz]

Something that people who don't know the show might hear and repeat. Like, wow, Shohei Ohtani did all of that on Half a tank of Gas or whatever. Like, that's what it should be. Now, Dan, I want to present a theory, if I may. I think that Jeremy was a plant. I think Jessica was like, hey, let me get multiple stakes on this. Jeremy, get Dan to say Jimmy Butler one more time. And Jeremy said, I got it right now I'll pretend I have a stat of the day. And then Dan, he can't. He knows Dan can't resist the stat of the day. It's like. It's like putting steak in front of him, right? Oh my God.

[Amin Elhassan]

A stat of the day.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's like tuna steak.

[Stugotz]

Tuna steak. A tuna steak in front of him. And so they say, okay, Dan, we got it Saturday. And of course Dan takes the base because how could he not take the bait?

[Amin Elhassan]

Look, we have not made the bet yet and therefore I can say Jimmy Butler's name and talk about him as much as I like because the bet will be made toward the end of the show. If we remember we often don't can we negotiate?

[Dan Le Batard]

Also it was always multiple stakes. Stakes that's we're starting at the starting point is at least two stakes.

[Billy Corben]

Stakes outscored him too.

[Jessica]

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[Billy Corben]

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[David Sampson]

Weather is starting to warm up. Regular season starting to wind down. Games of consequence in sports starting to ramp up. I know what you're gonna need by your side. It's by my side already. Miller Lite. Yeah, that's right. I'm making my springtime a Miller Time. I'm making my sports time. Miller Time. Going to a car race. Miller Time. Gonna see some tennis Miller Time. Gonna chill in the backyard with some friends and make some memories. Miller Time. I love Miller Lite because it's got taste that I know I can depend on. No games, no gimmicks. It's that simple, folks. It's just a great beer. For people who like beer. Miller Lite is brewed for taste. It hits different than the other light beers. It's got simple ingredients and at just 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Miller time is always a good time. The original light beer since 1975 and still the very best one. Miller Lite. Great taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tastes like Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories, 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

[Amin Elhassan]

Don LeBatard there's sunglasses in boxes today.

[Billy Corben]

Put in my bed in the hospital.

[Stugotz]

Ending our lives.

[Billy Corben]

All the same stugats. It's the final nightgown.

[Jessica]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugach.

[Amin Elhassan]

I don't think that. I think the bet has to have greater stakes than that. I think it needs to be if we're going to build it up all show we've got.

[Dan Le Batard]

I agree, but it's got to have some consequences.

[Stugotz]

I mean, stakes are pretty good.

[Dan Le Batard]

I also agree when the start of the day is like, hey, 20 points is more than 18 points, it's not the best things.

[Billy Corben]

Kyle Anderson was plus 24.

[Amin Elhassan]

It stings. And thank you for all of your hard work. And when I say that it wasn't hard work at all. It was incredibly lazy. So I wanted to talk about something here, March Madness related. Can you get. Can. Can we get A poll together on the following. Because somebody made a five dollar bet. $5 on the following parlay. Dodgers to win the World Series. This is from last year. Dodgers to win the World Series.

[Billy Corben]

Check.

[Amin Elhassan]

Ohio State to win the national championship in football. The Eagles to win the Super Bowl. Tennessee to win in college baseball to win the College World Series still on the way. And now they have Duke to win the national championship. What do you think that that should pay? A five dollar bet that has those five in play. What do you think that that should pay? Roughly five figures.

[Jeremy]

At least five. Yeah, I'm going high five figures.

[Stugotz]

I'm going seven. $37,000.

[Jeremy]

No, that's close to like 50, 60, $70,000.

[Stugotz]

70,000. 73,000.

[Amin Elhassan]

So it's $168,000 on a $5 bet. And what I wanted to ask you guys is what is the correct way to hedge that? Like, what is what? Because I'm not a professor. I'm. I'm a terrible gambler. Amateur, like. Like a really terrible gambler. I'm not good at it in any way. DraftKings should be ashamed for giving me any of their money. But I give it all right back.

[Billy Corben]

Don't say that. It's a contract.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yeah, I'm just saying, like, I could be the worst gambler there's ever been because I just, like, I just want to have one bet on one game. But a lot of games.

[Stugotz]

He is the perfect person for DraftKings to pay because as he just said, he's going to take all of that money right back into the sportsbook app.

[Amin Elhassan]

They might as well be laundering their money right back to them.

[Jessica]

Well, no, no.

[Stugotz]

Where's that music?

[Jessica]

So my guess is he'll win $7 million.

[Amin Elhassan]

We already gave it. You weren't listening. We already gave the answer. But that's excellent, producer.

[Jeremy]

You got to let it ride, Dan, because Duke is the favorite right now. Tennessee and baseball. That's.

[Amin Elhassan]

You've got to let it ride. You guys wouldn't hedge that. You guys. So wait a minute, Tony. I know that's not true. Tony, You're. You're. No, Tony, you just had a baby. If you made a $5 bet and you need now Duke to win the national championship for $168,000. You have to hedge that. If. And I'm asking you, how do you hedge it? Do you bet. Do you bet 10, $20,000 on. On their next four opponents as you go to make sure that you guarantee yourself X. What's the lowest amount of money? Now, I Know, some people would just sell this ticket. This ticket might go. Somebody might buy this ticket for, like, this is something that can. That. That is done, and that's how you get out. But how do you hedge this bet? I'm sure a professional gambler would easily answer this question, but I don't know how to do it.

[Jeremy]

So I was confused. I thought it was Tennessee baseball from this season. Yeah, but it's from last season, so.

[Billy Corben]

They already won it in May of 2024 last season.

[Stugotz]

Do we know when this parlay bet was placed? Because if it was after May of 2024, then we're talking about this upcoming College World Series.

[Jeremy]

No, no, it was last College World Series.

[Billy Corben]

They've already cashed everything else, so Duke.

[Amin Elhassan]

Is the only thing remaining.

[Stugotz]

Got it.

[Amin Elhassan]

So how. So how do you forgive me for not explaining that correctly? It's been an affliction today.

[Jessica]

So should the poll be should this person hedge or should they write it out?

[Amin Elhassan]

Well, I'm asking. First of all, I'm asking you guys. We'll get to the poll in a second. Thank you, Billy. Perhaps you can help me with that and create the poll yourself.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'll go first. Dan. I don't know.

[Jeremy]

Good. I know.

[Dan Le Batard]

I have no idea.

[Stugotz]

That's. This is.

[Dan Le Batard]

I don't know.

[Stugotz]

Look, I'm not going to say it's in the same zip code as. As that stat of the day, but it's close. It's close. Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

Move off of looking for me to answer, because I don't know.

[Jeremy]

All right, Dan, so here's. Here's the thing. So the cash out. I just looked it up. The cash out for the guy is 50 grand. So if I tell my wife. Look, baby, listen. We got 50 grand cash for sure. Obviously, Uncle Sam's gonna take his piece. You know, things are gonna happen, whatever. But Duke right now, I mean, is steamrolling. Like, they are not close. Like they are just beating their third guy is great. Okay, you know you've seen Cooper flag, right? You get Cooper flags. Like, oh, yeah, I saw him in the select thing and the thing on Max, I was like, yep, same guy. He's incredible. It's going to be the number one pick. Maybe the Wizards, maybe the Hornets. Who knows? Not the point. The point is he's the best player in college basketball right now. Duke is churning. They're the best Duke team we've seen in maybe 20 years.

[Stugotz]

A long time. It's been a long time, baby.

[Jeremy]

You know what's better than 50 grand? Cash. After Uncle Sam Taking his piece, which you know we're going to leave him like 30 something. You know what's better than that?

[Stugotz]

What's better?

[Jeremy]

168.

[Stugotz]

What? That's a lot of money.

[Amin Elhassan]

Tell baby.

[Jeremy]

Hey, all of a sudden, Miami real estate, you know how it is.

[Amin Elhassan]

Jessica is saying. Jessica's saying she doesn't know and I don't know. And there is a professional way to do this. But what I'm asking all of you is the hypothetical. Would you guys hedge that or would you just try and ride it out? Because I would assume all of you would hedge it to guarantee yourself an amount of money that doesn't wait for whether or not Cooper Flag. Cooper flag's ankle goes again. And Duke can win it, obviously without Cooper fl.

[Stugotz]

I don't know if they can win over.

[Jeremy]

That makes it easier with Cooper fly.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, Cooper fly.

[Jeremy]

I think you have to wait till you get to the final and then just absolutely monster hedge on the other team. Right? Because you're still waiting. Because right now you can't just pick Duke or the field for $50,000. I can't take a second mortgage a HELOC out of my house and then put it on the. On on the field.

[Billy Corben]

I do think that because it was a five dollar bet from the jump, this changes a lot, right? Like if it was a huge bet with then a huge payout, maybe you continue to invest, but the fact that you only put five bucks on it, it's like ride what that feels like until the end and maybe, maybe you don't come up with $168,000. But in the worst case, you lost five bucks.

[Stugotz]

But. But that's.

[Amin Elhassan]

No but. You lost 50,000 bucks. You didn't lose five bucks. The worst case is you lost 50. What kind of math are you doing?

[Stugotz]

Terrible math.

[Billy Corben]

This is why I was a journalist major Dan.

[Jeremy]

He couldn't sell it to his wife. That's the issue now.

[Stugotz]

There you go, number one. Number two. This is what's giving you that kind of stat of the day. Arithmetic.

[Amin Elhassan]

Okay. Why is he in charge of the stat of the day if he doesn't know basic math work?

[Stugotz]

Understaff.

[Billy Corben]

I was really good at calculus.

[Stugotz]

Were you?

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, I was great. Yeah, I got a five on the AP exam.

[Jessica]

U plus V equals us.

[Stugotz]

There it is. 50 grand, Dan, 50 grand's a lot of money.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, 168 is more.

[Amin Elhassan]

What I'm asking you guys is do you have the confidence in duke to lose $118,000? Do you have the confidence in Duke to bet $118,000 that they're going to win their next four games.

[Stugotz]

Tony gotta sell it again. Hold on.

[Jeremy]

Again, Cooper flag. You seen him, Dan? You saw when they threw him that alley oop and he screamed as he dunked and then he got off in the core.

[Jessica]

Was like, is there a cash out option for $50,000?

[Stugotz]

Yeah, right now.

[Jeremy]

Right now he can cash out 50.

[Stugotz]

Cash out.

[Jeremy]

But again, Billy, have you not been listening to this?

[Amin Elhassan]

He hasn't.

[Jessica]

He has, no, because, like, he's. He's losing only five actual dollars that he bet.

[Billy Corben]

That's what I'm saying. Thank you, Billy.

[Jessica]

Like, what he's put into it is $5, 50,000. He's giving up the opportunity to. To take $50,000, but he's also missing out on the opportunity to win 98,000. $108,000.

[Stugotz]

If a genie showed up now, Billy, and just said to you, hey, I can either give you 50 grand now or we can wait and see if Duke wins and I'll give you 168. What are you doing? Are you saying, no, thanks, genie, and.

[Jessica]

I would take it, but you take.

[Stugotz]

The 50 or you. Or you say, I'll hold out?

[Jessica]

No, I'll take the 50.

[Stugotz]

There you go.

[Jessica]

It's easy money, but Tony's talking me into, you know, the 160.

[Jeremy]

By the way, con canipple another guy in the lottery. K2, very good from the outside, but can mix it in with the big boys inside. Big body. They got Maluk, who's incredible.

[Amin Elhassan]

Are you pronouncing those names correctly?

[Jeremy]

Yes. A lot of the other guy knows.

[Dan Le Batard]

It doesn't seem like knipple should I? But I know it is because I've watched him play, but it just doesn't seem.

[Amin Elhassan]

I saw people being critical of Tony earlier, saying he was mispronouncing multiple names on Duke. Not today. Earlier.

[Jeremy]

Cooper flag and Con Canipple is exactly how you say it. So whoever that guy is.

[Dan Le Batard]

Dork.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

I want to combine spoiler Wednesdays with this current Duke conversation for a moment. Did you guys see that? And this is a White Lotus light spoiler. So fast forward if you don't want to know anything about the most spoiler Wednesday.

[Amin Elhassan]

I thought we were allowed to do whatever we want.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm still giving the spoiler alert. Duke was not happy with the usage of their trademark in the most recent episode of the White Lotus. And they released a statement saying the White Lotus not only uses our brand without permission, but in our view, uses it on Imagery that is troubling does not reflect our values or who we are, and simply goes too far. And then they further talked about, you know, suicide awareness and things like that. But I want to know who the Duke person is that Mike White, the creator of White Lotus, hates. Because the usage of Duke in the last episode is something that, if you haven't seen it on social media yet, is going to become a meme for our times.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

All right, let's take this to the poll.

[Amin Elhassan]

Do you believe that Duke will win four games? Yes or no? This poll is brought to you by Evan Williams Bourbon.

[David Sampson]

Game day's number one.

[Jeremy]

Poor Evan Williams. Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey bars down.

[Amin Elhassan]

Kentucky 43 to 45, alcohol by volume. Enjoy responsibilities 21 over.

[Billy Corben]

Can we also put on the poll, are you losing $5 or $50,000?

[Dan Le Batard]

You guys don't like that? Duke is pissed that they're in a funny meme now.

[Stugotz]

I love it. I love it. But also, I'm not fond of Duke.

[Billy Corben]

That's why he just, like, really hates Greg.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's why it's funny.

[Stugotz]

Dude, that's an interesting question. Who is the person? It's Christian Laettner, I think.

[Billy Corben]

So it likes all the way back.

[Amin Elhassan]

No, it's JJ Reddick.

[Stugotz]

JJ Redick is another good one.

[Amin Elhassan]

We already had this conversation. Those are the three Mount Rushmore guys at Duke. I don't know who's number four on Annoying Guy? Annoying. The secret sauce. Is it Shane Battier?

[Stugotz]

Shane Batty.

[Dan Le Batard]

Does Coach K count?

[Stugotz]

Of course he does.

[Amin Elhassan]

All right, let's get. Let's make that fourth spot.

[Dan Le Batard]

So wait, Mike Wade's 54. I thought he was a little younger. So it probably is Christian Leitner.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, Christian Laettner.

[Amin Elhassan]

So we have on the Mount Rushmore of most annoying Duke players ever. Because if what you're telling me, like, man, Cooper Flagg. Boston's gonna really want him.

[Jeremy]

So is Utah.

[Stugotz]

Oh, Utah salvage right now.

[Amin Elhassan]

Danny Ainge. Danny Ainge left everything. Boston to go. I'll build you out here. I'll build you out here with Cooper Flag in Utah.

[Stugotz]

So, you know the Vince McMahon meme of, like, he's going and he's leaning back. That's. That's Utah. Right. The first one is like, what if I gave you Laurie Markkanen? Oh, that's pretty interesting. Then the next one is Walker Kessler. What if I give Walker. Oh, and then the third one is, what do I give you? Philipowski. Oh, and then the fourth one, Cooper Flag.

[Jeremy]

The laser shooting out of his eyes.

[Stugotz]

That's how it goes for Utah.

[Amin Elhassan]

Well, you guys are saying, you have to understand, okay, so you've got John Skipper and David Sampson asking the question, how do we pay these people? And what does it mean if Duke. We're all watching Duke and we're like, whoa, them in Florida, they look a lot better than everybody else. This is pronounced. This. This looks like they're maybe, yeah, maybe. Maybe somehow Calipari can sneak some Calipari magic in and somewhere. But we're watching there. It's. You tell me if there's a third team that belongs in here. Because Duke and Florida to me look like they're a level above professional. Between professional basketball and what's now minor league basketball, they seem to be a good deal better. So if I make Duke better at recruiting and better at money than everyone, when I'm walking around now doing the absurd thing of saying, yeah, your roster costs 20 million. That's what it costs in college football. You gotta have $20 million if Duke gets all of the winning. And they have a monopoly on annoying guys, right? Throughout history. There's no other school. Is there another school that you assign even two annoying guys to for a Mount Rushmore? In the history of college basketball, is there another that you would say, I've got two Mount Rushmore. America hated this person. When you're talking about everything that Duke represents, all of it, Redick, Grayson, Allen and Christian Laettner are all time hated players. I don't even know if we can make those anywhere outside of Duke anymore. Like an all time hated player. Because of the school you're at, because we know you're good, because you're arrogant, because you think you're better than everyone and you slap the court on defense.

[Jeremy]

Hate that. Oh, you play defense.

[Stugotz]

Should be on that mountain.

[Dan Le Batard]

Coaches, that's a different story because I think Dan Hurley has arrived.

[Stugotz]

Oh, man, he's way worse than Coach K. Way, like, way more polarizing than Coach K. For sure. I think coaches, actually, there's a conversation. Pitino people didn't like Pitino. Coach Cal, people really didn't like Coach Bobby Knight, obviously. Bobby Knight.

[Amin Elhassan]

No, it's easy with coaches. No, I'm talking about players.

[Stugotz]

Players only.

[Amin Elhassan]

I'm asking. I'm asking America to give me the program that's got a player that you recoil with. The three I just named with that guy just annoys me. It's not even. It's not because he's. It's not because he's a bad person. It's just. It's Your face. It's your face. I'm.

[Stugotz]

I'm gonna. It's. This is gonna lose. Perhaps the shipping container, Dan. But Indiana and Steve Alford, people really didn't like that. Dude, man.

[Amin Elhassan]

The Fat five, It was their shorts.

[Jeremy]

More than the shorts, their shoes.

[Dan Le Batard]

You saw the story about UConn threatening the reporter who posted the video of Dan Hurley, right? I mean, that's some, like, evil and shit.

[Stugotz]

My guy, Bobby Mullen, the SID over at UConn, which I love, he threatened him. He said, I will end you, right? He said, that will ruin you. I will ruin you. And then they come out with the statement afterward. And he said, new at 6. Sid threatens reporter or whatever. I'm like, guy, you can't start your apology with shtick or can you? He did. And I thought it was glorious.

[Billy Corben]

Really quick. Really quick.

[Jeremy]

I mean, I have a question, because you talked about Utah and Walker Kessler, Lauri Markkanen, Cooper Flagg, possibly Filipowski. Could they field an all white starting lineup?

[Stugotz]

I'm glad you asked that, because just the other night in Los Angeles, the Bulls fielded an all white lineup.

[Amin Elhassan]

They scored 150 with an all white line up on Luke and.

[Billy Corben]

Dude, that team is so good.

[Jeremy]

They're fun.

[Billy Corben]

They're fun.

[Stugotz]

So we revealed this on Basketball Illuminati the other day, and it was. I was. I. I was like, is that right? No. I don't even know. Think they have five white players, but nope, it was right. They had five whites on the floor. It was Matas Buzzelis, who's not bad, by the way.

[Jeremy]

They're giving him minutes.

[Stugotz]

He's. He's pretty.

[Amin Elhassan]

He's looking good.

[Dan Le Batard]

I just realized the joke.

[Stugotz]

Thank you. It was Matas Buzzelas. It was.

[Amin Elhassan]

What happened to the white guys?

[Dan Le Batard]

Kevin Herder.

[Stugotz]

Kevin Herder, Vucevich and Kobe White. Five whites.

[Amin Elhassan]

Five whites. And one of them actually named White.

[Stugotz]

There you go.

[Billy Corben]

Well, that one.

[Stugotz]

Four whites.

[Amin Elhassan]

Oh, I thought. Wait a minute. Forgive me. I was going to trade for Derek White.

[Stugotz]

No. Well, Kobe White's already there.

[Amin Elhassan]

Yeah, we didn't need him. But.

[Stugotz]

But Boston could counter with Porzingis, Luke Cornett, Pritchard. Pritchard Hauser and Derrick White. White versus White. That would be the great NBA Finals ratings, right?

[Amin Elhassan]

Can I just examine for a second? I simply want to examine an sid, A sports information director. So this is somebody who is working in communications, who. Their job is to disseminate sports information. Do you realize how great a threat it is to be able to shout at someone, I will ruin You. The confidence you have to have to shout something like that in public and the rage that you have to have to shout something like that at somebody, at a journalist.

[Stugotz]

I know of some journalists who have yelled stuff like that.

[Dan Le Batard]

I can't think of a single Sid that I know in real life that would.

[Amin Elhassan]

Would.

[Dan Le Batard]

Would, like, fly off the handle like this. Like, the job of the SAD is also to make the team look good and to, like, make the players look good, to have media relations where they're like, hey, we're the good guys here. We didn't do anything wrong. And he's like, I'll ruin you for posting a thing that actually happened that we all heard.

[Amin Elhassan]

When your job is to disseminate sports information that you don't want disseminated.

[Stugotz]

That's. That's why I love his apology, because it starts at the sarcastic new at six, Sid gets angry at reporter for saying something. That's how he started his apology. Like, I went off the handle a little bit. But first, some shtick so good, though.

[Amin Elhassan]

That I'll ruin you. Hurley is. And, gosh, I love when these coaches are content machines. His arrogance is earned, of course, and he knows it. Like, he speaks it. He yells it at referees, and it's. I. I'm stunned to see it because Belichick didn't behave that way. Like, there have been people who have been as great as he is, and he descends from coaching. So he really like his whole story crafted by Woj and a basketball family of how it is that they rule basketball in the northeast because they teach it better. They have respect. The Hurleys have respect. Oh, Hurley's a good du kated guy.

[Stugotz]

There you go.

[Amin Elhassan]

His brother is a good du kated guy. The Hurley name feels like it's basketball royalty. It is in the Northeast, where they celebrate the whites. There's no other point I wanted to make.

[Billy Corben]

So I've been trying to be a little healthier here at the start of the year. I didn't exactly do that through a lot of last year. And. And it's really important to, you know, find the right ways to be able to eat and exercise. And if you're ready to optimize your nutrition. This year, factor has chef made gourmet meals that make eating well easy. They're dietitian approved and ready to heat in just two minutes so you can fuel and feel great no matter what life throws at you. Factor arrives fresh and fully prepared, perfect for any active, busy lifestyle like those of us in the shipping container. But with 40 options across eight dietary preferences on the menu each week. It's easy to pick meals tailored to your goals. Choose from preferences like Calorie Smart, Protein plus, or that Keto Diet. Reach your goals this year with ingredients you can trust and convenience that can't be beat. And guys, I can tell you this from my own personal experience. The Honey Mustard Chicken meal is absolutely delicious. It literally tastes like you're going to a restaurant. I've really been enjoying Factor Meals Eat Smart with Factor get [e-mail] Dan50OFF and use code Dan50OFF to get 50% off your first box plus free shipping. That's code [e-mail] Dan 50OFF to get 50% off plus free shipping on your first box hey friends, it's Jerra Baer here and I'm here to tell you all about Boost Mobile, which is now a legit nationwide 5G network network. So I must take a break from the jokes here for a second and put on my serious voice because I would never, ever joke about a 5G network that has invested billions building 5G towers across the country. Not even once. Not even if Mr. Boost Mobile himself asked me to. There is nothing funny about it. Boost Mobile is now a legit nationwide 5G network and also provides coverage across 99% of Americans. Seriously? Visit boostmobile.com or your nearest Boost Mobile store location to learn more. The Boost Mobile network, together with our roaming partners, covers 99% of the US population. 5G speeds not available in all areas.