Hour 3: Looooopez (feat. Mike Schur)

Summary

The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

Episode: Hour 3 – Looooopez (feat. Mike Schur)
Date: April 9, 2026
Main Theme:
A classic blend of sports banter and humor, today's episode centers around the intersection of baseball brawls, catchphrase comedy, baseball trivia (“The Pitch Clock” with a fantasy draft), and a lively interview with writer/baseball expert Mike Schur. The crew also debates the encroachment of pop culture into the sacred space of sporting events, particularly The Masters. All delivered in the uniquely irreverent, fast-paced style of the Le Batard team.

---

Episode Overview

The episode delivers classic Le Batard:

• Dissecting recent MLB suspensions (notably Solaire and Lopez) and the fairness of league punishments.
• Brainstorming new ways to deliver hot takes—literally with a “fire starter” and faux alarms.
• Playful ribbing over on-air blunders and self-referential humor, with Greg Cody’s catchphrase legacy at the center.
• Spirited discussion about The Masters’ coverage and the clash between tradition and modern entertainment.
• A “Pitch Clock” baseball trivia competition, capped with a deep-dive into the fortunes of the Pirates and Red Sox with Mike Schur.
• Reflection on baseball brawls and notable baseball names, all tied together with signature banter.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Baseball Brawls: Solaire and Lopez Suspensions

• Discussion opens (02:14) on the MLB handing down seven-game suspensions to Jorge Solaire and Reynaldo Lopez for a bare-knuckle brawl.
• Greg Cody argues for clear consequences:

  "You either allow fighting like hockey does or you don’t… I don’t think there should be an in between where it’s okay to do what they did and swing a fist with a baseball in it without any repercussion. It’s fair." (02:14)

• The crew ponders the proportionality of punishment for pitchers vs. position players, noting that seven games for a pitcher is "one start," while for hitters it's "seven times the punishment." (02:40)
• Zaslow:

  “Seven is a nothing punishment for a pitcher.” (02:36)

• Banter about who’s more penalized; nods to Lopez’s role (starter vs. reliever).

2. Catchphrases, Nicknames, and the Greg Cody Legacy

• Greg Cody’s role as "the fire starter" (03:34), and the team brainstorms a new hot-take delivery branded with fire alarms and music cues (03:56).
• Greg boasts about his growing list of catchphrases, sparking the idea of fans submitting tombstone inscriptions for him, e.g., “Excuse me for breathing” (07:40).
• The group playfully tries out new catchphrases and riffs on who has the best “inner monologue” voices.
• Greg:

  "I say that a lot." (14:21 — in response to suggestions for new catchphrases)

3. Live Sports Coverage & “Protect the Masters” Rant

• Deep discussion about the Masters’ evolving presentation on TV, including celebrity guests like The Miz and Kevin Hart (15:47–19:55).
• Tony:

  “Get away from my Masters. I’m the biggest hijinks guy there is—not with the Masters.” (16:06)

• Group bemoans that, despite multi-platform packages, coverage remains limited and precious.
• Chris:

  "How about, for the Masters, we show some golf?" (16:12)

• They reflect on generational divides:
  Zaslow:

  “We’re now the show old enough to protect the Masters’ delicate sensibilities…” (17:55)

• Ultimately, they accept that pop culture crossovers are the future, but still want more focus on the actual sport.

4. Baseball Trivia: The Pitch Clock Draft

• The segment (24:13 onward) has Dan and Tony draft pitchers from 2000–2010, with points based on strikeouts minus hits.
• Early picks:
  • Randy Johnson (Dan)
  • Curt Schilling, Johan Santana (Tony)
• There’s slapstick as the panel fumbles with math, rules, and negative scores.
• Memorable player choices: Pedro Martinez, Jake Peavy, Roy Oswalt, Billy Wagner, Roger Clemens, Roy Halladay, Brandon Webb, Cliff Lee.
• As totals swing wildly, the segment delivers both baseball nostalgia and comedy gold.
• Ethan:

  “These are gonna be some big numbers, guys. We’re dealing with big, big numbers here.” (25:58)

5. Interview: Mike Schur on Pirates Hype & Red Sox Despair

• Mike Schur joins (27:42) to discuss the Pirates’ incredible youth movement—highlighting Connor Griffin’s call-up and deal:

  “The arrows are flashing green in Pittsburgh for the first time in as long as I can remember.” (29:43)

• The Red Sox’s disappointing start (3–8) is dissected. Schur unloads:

  "They basically did that in reverse… started with a car and kept making trades and ended up with a paperclip." (30:11) "[Craig] Breslow did a press conference...sounded like the most annoying guy at the McKinsey Consulting corporate retreat..." (31:23)

• The team identifies the perils of offseason baseball optimism and mismanagement.

6. Greatest Baseball Fights & Star of the Week

• Prompted by the Solaire/Lopez brawl, Schur credits the all-time greatest brawl moment: Nolan Ryan headlocking Robin Ventura (35:51).
• Another gem: Izzy Alcantara’s legendary minor league back-kick to the catcher.

  “Maybe the greatest baseball fight move of all.” (36:17)

• Golden Era Star of the Week nominees: Drake Baldwin, Sandy Alcantara, Joe Adell (who robbed three home runs in one game).
• Schur picks:

  “It's gotta be Joe Adell…The third robbery…so iconic!” (38:31)

7. Closing: Fun Baseball Names and Little League Awards

• Schur’s favorite names: Izzy Alcantara, Kevin McGonigle, Spencer Torkelson (40:01)

  “It's like a cat got loose on a keyboard and…banged out a bunch of letters.” (40:02)

• Dan recalls his own "Barry Zito Award" from Little League, awarded by his dad, instead of MVP or Cy Young (43:10).

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Greg Cody, on the tombstone suggestion: “Excuse me for breathing. That's not bad. You're right.” (07:40)
• Dan Le Batard, on the Masters coverage: “How about, for the Masters, we show some golf?” (16:12)
• Mike Schur, on the state of the Red Sox: “Started with a car, and kept making trades and ended up with a paperclip.” (30:11)
• Mike Schur, on Breslow: “He just sounded like the most annoying guy at the McKinsey Consulting corporate retreat...” (31:23)
• Mike Schur, on baseball fights: “Nothing beats Nolan Ryan and Robin Ventura. That’s the best one ever, by far.” (35:51)
• On Joe Adell’s historic feat: “You got to give it to the guy who robbed three homers in a game.” (38:43)

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment/Event | |------------------|---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:14–03:39 | Breakdown of Solaire/Lopez brawl suspensions | | 03:34–05:55 | The “fire starter” hot-take brainstorming | | 07:40–08:05 | Greg Cody’s catchphrase / tombstone contest idea | | 14:21–14:44 | New catchphrases and nickname riffs | | 15:47–20:23 | Masters coverage debate; pop culture vs. tradition | | 24:13–27:00 | Pitch Clock draft: rules and early picks | | 27:42–32:54 | Mike Schur on the Pirates’ prospects and Red Sox woes | | 35:33–36:51 | Baseball brawl analysis; greatest fight moments | | 38:31–39:08 | Star of the Week: Joe Adell’s three home run robberies | | 43:10–43:26 | Dan’s Little League “Barry Zito Award” story |

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Episode Tone & Style

• Fast-paced ensemble comedy: Interjections, jokey accusations, and musical cues keep segments lively.
• Self-referential: Runs inside jokes and callbacks to past mistakes and show lore.
• Lighthearted but insightful: While the tone is unserious, discussions—especially on baseball analysis—show real depth.

---

For the Listener

This episode is an energetic ride through the lighter and weirder corners of sports and sports media, blending catchphrase contests, nostalgia, and both mock and actual expertise. If you’re a baseball fan, a lover of sports arguments, or just enjoy hearing professional goofballs invent new games on the fly, this one’s for you.

Memorable for:

• The candid, comedic skewering of both recent sports headlines and the crew’s own gaffes.
• Mike Schur’s expert blend of statistical analysis and storytelling.
• The meta-commentary on how sports TV both resists and embraces pop culture.

No need to worry if you missed it—the best bits were jokes, riffs, and baseball love delivered at their classic rapid-fire clip.

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Transcript

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[Quaker Oats Announcer]

It is an honor to share.

[McDonald's Promo Host]

No, it's our honor.

[Dan LeBatard]

It is our larger honor.

[Guest or Co-host]

No, really stop.

[McDonald's Promo Host]

You can really feel the respect in this battle. Pick a meal to pick a side.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Ba da ba ba ba and participate

[Dan LeBatard]

in McDonald's while supplies last.

[Apple Watch Sleep Score Announcer]

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[Dan LeBatard]

This is the Dan Levator show with

[Stu Guts]

the Stu Guts Podcast.

[Zaslow]

We have an alarm that's telling us to get out of the building immediately. We are ignoring it in the brave fight to bring you content under any and all duress here at Meadowlark Media. If an alarm goes off again telling us to get off the air, we will not do so for another 17 minutes until we've handed over the show to Jeremy Tashay and Pitch Clock where baseball is covered better than it is covered here. Greg Cody was very happy to see Solaire and Lopez get seven games for that bare knuckle brawl in which they they fought and got seven games of suspension. You were happy to see punishment there, Greg.

[Greg Cody]

I was. I mean you look, you either allow fighting like like hockey does or you don't. I don't think there should be an in between where it's okay to do what they did and swing a fist with a baseball in it without any repercussion. It's fair.

[Guest or Co-host]

Seven, I think, is more than they normally hand out. So it must have been because he punched him with the ball, right?

[Zaslow]

No, but seven is a nothing punishment for a pitcher.

[Greg Cody]

It's one start.

[Zaslow]

It's one start. But for a position player, that's seven times the punishment. And I don't know why Solaire. Giving Solaire the greater punishment there, I guess, for instigating it. Right. But I mean, he did.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

He did get thrown at twice. He got hit and he got thrown

[Zaslow]

at a second time.

[Tony]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host]

Like, I hear what you're saying about the. It's only one start, you know, for the pitcher, but what are you going to do then to. To dole out equal punishment? You're going to suspend them for. For 30 games then? So it's. It's a month, you know.

[Zaslow]

Well, and you're going to. You're going to have to forgive me because the Braves rotation has been very good. But I don't know whether Lopez is a middle reliever or whether that's a bigger penalty for him because he's actually pitching every second or third game. It's probably information that's worth having here, and I don't think anybody in our

[Chris]

crew has it because I'm just learning his name.

[Zaslow]

Jeremy has.

[Stu Guts]

He's a pitcher.

[Mike]

Hey.

[Mike Scher]

But I'm worri. Working towards it.

[Chris]

I knew Solaire Lopez.

[Tony]

Thank you.

[Zaslow]

Thank you for that contribution. It was an excellent one. Greg Cody, that's why you're the fire starter.

[Greg Cody]

Appreciate that.

[Zaslow]

That right there, it's just saying Lopez with a little flourish in the corner.

[Greg Cody]

That is Lopez.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

That is.

[Zaslow]

That is why you are forever the fire starter.

[Greg Cody]

Yeah. You're trying to usurp my nickname, though. You've referenced yourself as a fire starter.

[Chris]

Man is a fire starter.

[Stu Guts]

Wow.

[Zaslow]

But I did that just. I did that as part of the. You know, I'm with the music, and we were doing a thing.

[Ethan]

Yeah, okay.

[Zaslow]

Right. I had the music. Like, there's a lit fuse and that.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Like, we could do hot takes that way where you light a fuse and then I grab it. Then you give me my music and I just.

[Dan LeBatard]

But you only have so much time because the fuse is going down.

[Chris]

Wait, Chris, give me the ball. Can I try it? All right, Hit me. I think Lamar Jackson's lost half a step.

[Dan LeBatard]

Do you want to try that again?

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Mike Scher]

One more time.

[Chris]

I tripped up.

[Mike Scher]

No, I'm scared.

[Chris]

Saying it one more time.

[Zaslow]

Are you guys trying to birth right

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

now the hottest take? The hottest take in the universe?

[Chris]

Yeah. I think Lamar Jackson's loss. Oh, wait, hang on. Give me a second. Take three.

[Dan LeBatard]

Take three.

[Greg Cody]

What?

[Chris]

Wait, hold on. No, let it go, Tony.

[Dan LeBatard]

I want to hear this.

[Chris]

Yeah. The take is so hot that it started a fire alarm. Yeah, Lamar Jackson has lost a step.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

It needs music behind it, though. And then you got the fire alarms.

[Tony]

If I play music, you can't hear the match.

[Zaslow]

Well, but no, I think I. Look, we're doing this on the floor.

[Dan LeBatard]

Strike the match. Play the music.

[Zaslow]

Look, I'm glad. I'm just thrilled that I have this

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

team of musicians around me to make

[Zaslow]

this like what we're trying to birth right now. All of us as a team, in harmony with all of the equipment given

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

to us by God, which is a

[Zaslow]

firestart Carter nickname, the sound of fire,

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

and some public domain rock music not

[Zaslow]

unlike the one that just resurrected Chris

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Mad Dog Russo as he yelled at the Marlins dugout for calling pitches.

[Zaslow]

I want to rival that. I must rival that. Give me my music after you've started the fuse.

[Tony]

I think I have it here.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

And let's see if we could get the elser building to sing with us

[Zaslow]

by giving us the fire alarm when

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

it makes it all music.

[Mike]

Hit me.

[Dan LeBatard]

Ty Simpson's a bust.

[Chris]

I need a little bit more space.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

That's not the timing.

[Dan LeBatard]

A little bit more.

[Tony]

I thought you wanted magic music.

[Mike]

No, no, no, no.

[Chris]

I need to say the match take gap to say the take. I can read the waveforms. Give me little gap. That's.

[Dan LeBatard]

That's not enough gap right there.

[Chris]

And then let me like. And then I'll lead up to the guitar.

[Mike Scher]

Look, this is good.

[Chris]

This is.

[Mike Scher]

This is what?

[Chris]

Magic making.

[Zaslow]

Brainstorming. Brainstorming.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

This is how you.

[Zaslow]

You get your time ready.

[Mike Scher]

You sure I have enough time to say that?

[Chris]

Because I kind of rushed it.

[Zaslow]

You did rush it. Your timing was bad.

[Chris]

I mean, it was. It was.

[Stu Guts]

Got it.

[Mike]

We didn't know.

[Chris]

It wasn't my timing.

[Dan LeBatard]

I got it.

[Greg Cody]

I think he said yes.

[Mike]

Hit me.

[Chris]

Ty Simpson is going to be a bust.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

You should come out. We should have like some sort of

[Zaslow]

blowtorch or some sort of some magic fire wand.

[Chris]

Fire alarm goes off enough in this place. I don't know. An actual blowtorch.

[Zaslow]

A fuego wand. Zaz, are you okay? Have you recovered in any way from your colleagues laughing at you, the enemy Internet celebrating your misery?

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

And Tony has been as happy. If I'm being honest as can be as happy as Greg Cody because you've

[Zaslow]

gotten him off the hook.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Tony thought he was going to have the the worst mistake of the week with Luke Thomas. It was a good mistake.

[Tony]

He was trying to chickens coming home to roost.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

That was a bad one too.

[Zaslow]

Look, we.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

I'm going to bring it all back up again and ask for nominations and

[Zaslow]

voting submissions because to have a week

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

when we also hit Sampson with the hava nagila music by accident

[Zaslow]

and that

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

doesn't even make the list of funny things that happen on on things that can't happen.

[Tony]

We have my dad's breathing yesterday.

[Greg Cody]

Oh, excuse me for breathing.

[Tony]

I mean that you want to say

[Stu Guts]

far from the mic.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

That's a good tombstone.

[Greg Cody]

Excuse me for breathing. That's not bad. You're right.

[Tony]

Tombstone is already too filled. We have to that kind of thing.

[Zaslow]

I We will fail if we do not do this as a contest. We will fail if Greg Cody does not select legitimately and really sell to his listeners the right to name his

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

tombstone because they have properly celebrated him through humor. He would absolutely do that with four year. Four.

[McDonald's Promo Host]

Four.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

With four words. And excuse me for breathing would work for your. The Samson demon child voice has legs

[Zaslow]

and I'd want it to be its own podcast.

[Chris]

Let's have Dan promote our podcast, the Greg Cody show featuring Greg Cody.

[Greg Cody]

No. What voice was that?

[Chris]

I'm workshopping. It's like a voice. All right, let's see. Let's see what you. What's.

[Tony]

What would my dad's voice be?

[Zaslow]

We can keep working with this because you.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

You've managed on. Look, it took you only two times

[Zaslow]

on my inner monologue to find a good one. And it took you only one time.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

You will not do better than the

[Zaslow]

one you already have with Samson. If Greg Cody can have an inner monologue, you'll cause real chaos in our workplace.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

Hunt. A little bit more reverb on that.

[Greg Cody]

Did you just go brat?

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Yes. That's one of your. That's one of your burps.

[Greg Cody]

You know me too well. Wayner boy.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

Ass wipe. Don't go showering. Yeah, Trailer's for sale.

[Greg Cody]

All red.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

His inner monologue is just.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

It's just his cat's face. It's just his cat face.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

It's made of a shallow driver. Comfort is paramount. Little league theory.

[Greg Cody]

Who's feeding you those lines?

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Where's my click click?

[Inner Monologue Voice]

I was building up to it. I think this one's just too similar to Dan's voice, though. All right, I'll keep working.

[Mike Scher]

There's always that shift after college hoops where you think things are gonna slow down and instead it's just different sports pulling you in. Now it's baseball. Every night you swear you're only half watching, and then suddenly you're locked into the seventh inning. Then you flip over, it's the cars making left turns for three hours and somehow you're locked in. This was me, actually, the other night. I told myself I'd just stay home, keep it casual. Then my buddy, college Mike texted me, hey, come through. We've got everything on. And I said, yeah. I picked up a pack of Miller Lite on the way. The next thing you know, we've got multiple screens going. Everybody's locked in onto something different. And the whole night just builds and builds to one of those moments where you take a sip, you look around and you realize, yeah, this was the right call. Cheers to legendary moments with Miller Lite. Great taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

[Chris]

Hey, Roy, buddy. You know that energy shift when the game gets good and everybody all together in unison knows to stand up on their feet?

[Mike]

Oh, absolutely, Mike.

[Ethan]

Yeah?

[Chris]

You've been at many big time sporting events. You know that moment quite well. That's what it's like when you take your first sip of Cuervo.

[Mike]

Oh, delicious.

[Chris]

It's the signal that says, we're not checking the time anymore, pal. It's when small talk turns into stories. Cuervo, man. It's that high five. A random stranger effect. That's right. The game is popping. You're hugging people you never met before. That's the kind of energy that Cuervo brings. It's so smooth, so delicious. That's the Cuervo effect. Keep it Cuervo

[Mike]

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[Stu Guts]

some golf asmr sts oh me.

[Dan LeBatard]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the st.

[Tony]

By the way, at bowling last night, my dad thought of a new catchphrase to add to the list of the already created top 50.

[Guest or Co-host]

Is it. Is it one of the. What would be now 18? Number one.

[Tony]

I think he's going to force it in. It's a decent.

[Zaslow]

I have to say to you though, in this part it's been hard to learn in real time wherever we underestimate the old man. Okay. For you to be on this show today and make your worst mistake in 20 years while Greg Cody has a rocket ship of a joke that he's been telling for months.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

It's going to work.

[Zaslow]

His.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

His catchphrases are a career tribute. Like Greg Cody cannot go out with a bigger bang. If this is indeed the end of his career, then catchphrases shot into the sky. Working every last one of them. Where he's gonna prove to us he's got 50 catchphrases.

[Home Depot Announcer]

He's gonna.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

He. Damn right.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

He says you're gonna go to Buffalo with Bernie Parmale.

[Greg Cody]

Wow. That's not even on my list yet. Let me write that down.

[Stu Guts]

So annoying.

[Tony]

The one he added last night.

[Depop Announcer]

What'd you learn?

[Greg Cody]

Oh yeah, it's a big one.

[Zaslow]

It's not a big one.

[Greg Cody]

Greg go to Buffalo.

[Zaslow]

Craig, it's not with Bernie. Greg. Greg, how's.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

What?

[Greg Cody]

No, that's a. I say that a lot.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

What's the other one?

[Zaslow]

Greg.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

He would have slayed me if. If he had hit me with the others. I forgot what the others was said

[Zaslow]

the way the others.

[Greg Cody]

They all learned from me.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

If he had said that I'm the

[Inner Monologue Voice]

kind of guy that.

[Greg Cody]

Yeah, But enough about me.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

Dummy up. Save up.

[Zaslow]

Wow. Ball in the jack.

[Greg Cody]

That's a good recall by him or by me? By my inner voice recalling all those things. I'm impressed with me.

[Zaslow]

Zaslo. How are you holding up right now? Because you are. You've had a meteoric. A meteoric Rise through the industry. A career rejuvenation here.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Bad news for the elevators. Repeat do not that.

[Guest or Co-host]

That was like exactly what happened. That was my worst moment. But today, not far behind it because I like Dusty May and he's a champion coach. And okay, I guess the positive is Dusty Mae absolutely knows who I am now because I'm the Waymo and terrible question guy. So, like, he definitely knows me.

[Dan LeBatard]

But he knows you as a sucker, Right?

[Guest or Co-host]

Right. That's the part that's going to keep me awake tonight. I'm going to be lying in bed staring at the ceiling like, damn it. That was such a stupid question.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

Nice hat, asshole.

[Zaslow]

I have not watched the Masters in the other room, but I just saw

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

the Miz and Jason Kelsey.

[Chris]

Neither have we.

[Tony]

We were just talking about this. I am so out on what I. I kind of want to blame espn. Kevin Hart was at the part three. Jason Kelsey's all guys get away from my Masters. I'm a biggest hijinks guy. That there is not with the Masters.

[Chris]

Yeah, we have a novel idea over here. The custodians. How about for the Masters we show some golf?

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Guest or Co-host]

In all seriousness though, like, clearly the Miz is on the Masters because WrestleMania is next weekend and there's a very strong push to sell the ESPN app and WWE on espn. But I gotta be perfectly honest. Is the demo for the Masters the demo that's going to enjoy WrestleMania?

[Greg Cody]

The opposite, I would think. That's sacrilege to have him at Augusta. The Miz sacrilege?

[Chris]

No, he looks great and he likes golf.

[Mike Scher]

We like the Miz around these parts,

[Tony]

but this isn't on the Miz.

[Chris]

This could have like, this could have happened last night. A live sports center have a talk show type of vibe. It's a great way to use Laura Rutledge. But we do this every Thursday where we all get geeked up. It's been a year of waiting. Let's see the Masters. I want to see it all. I want to see Jack Nicklaus. I want to see Tom Watson. And then you realize, oh, there's some sort of embargo. I can't watch the Massers until like around like three o'.

[Tony]

Clock.

[Zaslow]

Tony, what are you laughing about?

[Dan LeBatard]

Couldn't you know, Zaz said, here's Kevin Hart. Is like a little side.

[Chris]

Here's Kevin Hart.

[Tony]

It was awkward. Kevin. I was watching the Par 3 contest yesterday and he was like trying to do the thing for the crowd and. And even the crowd was like not laughing because they're like, dude, I'VE been waiting my whole life to be at this event and watch this Part three contest. Why is Kevin Hart here?

[Chris]

I thought the coverage was going to be better this year because there's a new streamer involved. Yeah, you already have ESPN plus. You already have Paramount plus Prime was getting some of this coverage and ESPN was going to be boots on the ground again doing some sort of programming from it. So I thought finally for, for it here in the year of our Lord 2026, I can actually watch the Masters when it finally gets underway. And the answer is the coverage is still bad. It's just bad in more places.

[Zaslow]

Zaslow is watching his television and I'm watching all of you. And it's funny, after hearing Mike say wake up and smell the coffee and David Sampson say you can't fight City hall, we're now the show old enough to protect the Masters, delicate sensibilities and Golf Country Club away from the McAfee's and the Kelsey's. And don't ruin my good time Augusta Thursdays where I can get the right food for a dollar because we're going

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

back to the 1950s on the former plantations known as a place that was

[Zaslow]

owned by the Masters.

[Tony]

Zagaki in hindsight, me ripping Kevin Hart being at the Masters, I don't really

[Zaslow]

love that they're going to try. Look, this is the future of of sports entertainment.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

These are the people who run sports now. Don't be precious about Bert Kreischer's in

[Zaslow]

your Netflix outfield on opening day like

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

the people who run sports now.

[Tony]

I'm fine with it at opening day, not the Masters.

[Chris]

Yeah, well, isn't the Masters so self important and so precious about it? I don't mind the hacks that they're taking. Honestly, there is an audience for that. It's the Masters. If any golf event is going to get casual viewers that be in on a sit down with Kevin Hart, it's this. What I'm saying is have the actual golf too.

[Zaslow]

You're offending though the delicate sensibilities of somebody who wants their sweet, charming Augusta fairways on a Thursday afternoon to be quiet, serene and a visit to a to a quainter time when programming now

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

shifts toward hey, we've got wrestling to him. The Miz needs to get out here and promote what he's got because this is how networks always build. We have the stars from the other things come and build a bigger network like that's they're in the television game. What are you being precious about? If Augusta didn't want to televise. Don't televise it. They did it for many years where they wouldn't allow any of this to be televised. This is what the future looks like.

[Chris]

They kind of, they kind of don't televise it. Still, to some degree as he as you get, you know, started with it, like I said, there's an audience for it. I get it. I just want to be able to watch the golf when the golf starts and for whatever reason with this tournament, despite them selling even more packages, there's three huge media companies that have access to this and yet I can only watch a handful of holes if I, if I go to a certain streamer and I can or I can watch main channel ESPN and watch a sit down with Jason Kelsey. I kind of just want to see like, you know, what's more cowa up to.

[Tony]

And you see live at the Masters, you're like, this must be it. And it's just people talking about the Masters.

[Zaslow]

Can you give him his music and see if he can do this take correctly as a former ESPN woke artist of take. Because if you want to get this takeoff right, whatever it is, I don't know what you're arguing for. Masters, my precious Masters. Please don't include wrestling.

[Chris]

I want to watch golf.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Oh, there's the fire alarm going off. It's going off at the right time. Right there. Get out of the building. Everybody. Run for your lives. Pitch clock is coming. We don't want to be here when it gets here. It's coming in 30 seconds.

[Tony]

Bring us home, Greg.

[Chris]

It means talk.

[Greg Cody]

Rules of 50 cents.

[Inner Monologue Voice]

And that's how it was

[Greg Cody]

back in my day.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Sing the pitch clock is next, Greg.

[Tony]

Sing it.

[Greg Cody]

The pitch clock is next,

[Dan LeBatard]

folks.

[Tony]

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[Ethan]

Mmm.

[Dan LeBatard]

So good.

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[Guest or Co-host]

Don LeBatard can I tell you something I don't know? Maybe like a month ago and I decided to watch Pitch Clock and I told Jeremy Stugats, this is a good show you're doing.

[Dan LeBatard]

This is the Dan lebatar Show with two guards. Chris, when you were a coach, did you use like an indicator when you gave signs?

[Tony]

Yeah.

[Dan LeBatard]

What was it? I like going nose is the indicator to ear. That was like bunt.

[Tony]

For me it was Every sign follows the right ear and I'll follow the

[Dan LeBatard]

right ear as soon as next thing.

[Tony]

After the right ear, that's the sign going.

[Dan LeBatard]

You hear me? Got you like that one. Welcome to the Pitch Clock. Here's the Pitch, a two part baseball segment combining a nostalgic baseball trivia game and an interview with an expert. This is the Pitch Clock. The pitch clock is here and I am battling through it.

[Stu Guts]

Hi everybody.

[Dan LeBatard]

Very excited. By the time you hear from our 2026 MLB expert, Mike Scher, question mark. Hopefully he's supposed to be the guy on this episode. If he is, I'll have more of a Voice by then. But for now, we're going to power through it. And, Ethan, you're going to let us know what our game is today.

[Ethan]

Hello, friends.

[Dan LeBatard]

Hello.

[Ethan]

Today we're going to do a rotational draft. So you guys are going to draft a rotation, five pitchers between 2000 and 2010. We're going to add up a total. That total is going to be strikeouts minus hits from between 2000 and 2010. So I have the strikeout leaderboard pulled up here. If you go off the leaderboard, I'll find the guy and I'll do the math. But obviously, when we do these subtraction things, negatives can come into play. So highest score at the end will win the game. And, Jeremy, you are on a roll right now, my friend. On an absolute heater.

[Dan LeBatard]

So I'm starting.

[Ethan]

You're starting.

[Dan LeBatard]

And this is strikeouts minus hits.

[Ethan]

Strikeouts minus hits.

[Dan LeBatard]

I mean, I feel like the answer to start is pretty obvious. Randy Johnson.

[Ethan]

Yeah, Randy Johnson. Brandon Johnson had 2182 strikeouts in this time period. And 16, 16 hits allowed. 566 is where you.

[Dan LeBatard]

Okay, thank you.

[Chris]

Chris. Cody.

[Ethan]

These are gonna be some big numbers, guys. We're dealing with big, big numbers here.

[Tony]

You love that I'm struggling already. I'm not struggling. I'm just deciding which name I want to say here.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, of course.

[Tony]

I'll stay in the same realm. Kurt Schilling.

[Greg Cody]

Okay.

[Ethan]

Schilling had 1545 strikeouts. This is some easy math. 15, 15 hits. So 30 for Schilling.

[Greg Cody]

Damn.

[Dan LeBatard]

30. So 566 to 30 to 30.

[Tony]

Not a great start for me.

[Dan LeBatard]

Pedro Martinez.

[Ethan]

That was the one you should have gone with, Cody.

[Tony]

Yeah.

[Ethan]

Because Pedro Martin, 16, 20 strikeouts, 1171.

[Greg Cody]

You know what I did there?

[Tony]

I thought maybe he was, like, more of a 90s guy.

[Chris]

I was like.

[Ethan]

Yeah, well, his great year was in. Was in 99. So Pedro Martinez. 449.

[Greg Cody]

Damn.

[Tony]

All right, so I'm behind.

[Greg Cody]

Yeah.

[Dan LeBatard]

By, like, just about a thousand.

[Zaslow]

Yeah.

[Greg Cody]

All right.

[Chris]

This is not going.

[Dan LeBatard]

But plenty of room to grow. We're doing five each.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Yeah.

[Ethan]

And plenty of room for Jeremy to go down as well.

[Stu Guts]

It's true.

[Ethan]

Don't forget about that.

[Greg Cody]

All right.

[Tony]

Feeling all rattled. Jeremy dunking on how he's been dominating me has just kind of thrown me here. Johan Santana, that is a good pick there.

[Ethan]

Cody, you're gonna get back in this

[Dan LeBatard]

one a little bit.

[Ethan]

268 for Cody there.

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, that's a good one.

[Tony]

So I'm up to 2.

[Ethan]

298. Correct. And Jeremy is up To a lot.

[Dan LeBatard]

And with us now is our 2026. And I know he loves to be referred to as baseball expert. Baseball expert.

[Greg Cody]

Michael.

[Dan LeBatard]

Sure. Mike, it's great to see you, man. It's been a while and I'm excited to have you back here on the pitch clock.

[Stu Guts]

I'm very excited to be here. Yes, it has been a while. But also, you know, baseball disappears for six months. So it makes some sense that it's been a while.

[Dan LeBatard]

But Mike, I want to start with some, some positivity before we get to your Red Sox because the Pittsburgh Pirates have gotten off to a pretty fun start. At the time of this recording, they're 7 and 4 coming off a win where you saw Paul Skeens do his thing and of course Connor Griffin contributing. So Connor Griffin, for those of you who don't know, the 19 year old hotshot prospect just brought up by the Pirates, the number one overall prospect in baseball and now signed to a nine year old $150 million deal to stay in Pittsburgh through 2034, which is pretty sweet. Mike, can you put into perspective the hype around this kid and what this call up really means?

[Stu Guts]

It's so exciting to have him on the Pirates because they already have skins and they have Bubba and they've got these. This like baseball is better when the Pirates are good and it just is has been such a rare thing in the last 30 years, but they now have arguably three of the what, like 12 best prospects or like young guys at the major league level on the same team. And credit to them, they did some good work of like packing in like legitimate MLB players around those guys in the off season. So I think that the two signs that are really pointing in the right direction for them are number one, small sample size. But in his first game he just looked like he absolutely belonged in the majors. And the second thing is that they locked him up. Like this is a thing they have net they have not done at all in the last, you know, two decades.

[Dan LeBatard]

Right.

[Stu Guts]

Is commit to guys and they committed to him. And I don't know, I just. The Arrows are flashing green in Pittsburgh for the first time in as long as I can remember.

[Dan LeBatard]

Our friend Dave Danishek is probably very, very excited as he was talking my ear off in December about what he thought the Pirates could be. And now here we are with Connor Griffin called up. But Mike. But I'm sorry because now we have to go to the negative and unfortunately the negative is your favorite team. The Boston the bond. The Boston Red Sox are off to A pretty dreadful start. 3 and 8 to start the year. Seems like they're going to be in a little bit of trouble. What's up with your Red Sox?

[Stu Guts]

The trouble is legitimate. Like we all, and by we I mean Red Sox fans, talked ourselves into being legitimate contenders this year. In the off season, they signed Sonny Gray, they signed Oviedo, who seemed like he would be good. He's now got a flexor tendon strain and maybe is, you know, in trouble. They made a bunch of moves that were like, to shore up the parts of the team, the wild card team last year that, you know, seemed like they were on the ready to. On the verge of breaking out. And then you get to the actual season and you're like, oh, they might suck. Like, so they had Bregman there last year and he played really well. He was hurt for a while, but he played really well. And then this year they just didn't sign him. He signed with the Cubs and they replace him with Caleb Durbin. And you know that thing where like you see on the Internet sometimes where like a guy starts with a paperclip and he makes trades and eventually he ends up with a car. They basically did that in reverse, right? Started, they started with a car and kept making trades and ended up with a paperclip. And Durbin has like 6% bat speed and like never hits the ball hard. And suddenly you're just like, yeah, how did we think this was going to work? They're banking on Trevor's story to match what he did last year, which was a little fluky for him and obviously he's been hurt a lot. But they suddenly. It's like a classic baseball delusion where your team makes a bunch of moves and you get excited and talk yourself into the mall being really smart. The real problem though is that in those moves, like it has highlighted what we've kind of quietly known for a long time, which is that Craig Breslow might be really bad at his job. He, he got a bunch of young guys in a bunch of these trades and then flipped those guys for other guys and again turned cars into paperclips. Like, he had James Tibbs, who was a first round draft choice a few years ago, and he flipped Tibbs to the Dodgers for Dustin May, who was coming off his 11th Tommy John surgery and terrible last year. And Tibbs is now absolutely mashing for the Dodgers who need the help. I'm glad the Dodgers have a. Yeah. And then recently, I don't know if you saw this, but Breslow did a press conference about. About the moves he makes, and he talked about, like, optimizing performance metrics and all this crap. And he just. He sounded like the most annoying guy at the McKinsey Consulting corporate retreat. Like, that you guy. You just, like, if he sat down at your table in the cafeteria, you'd, like, wrap it up real fast and get out of there. And every. Essentially every move he has made has. Has backfired. They need some of these guys who showed promise last year to actually have good years. And so far, there's precious little to be happy about outside of WBC hero William Breu, who's absolutely destroying the ball, which makes me very happy.

[Dan LeBatard]

All right, I'm gonna see if I can keep doing this.

[Tony]

Now.

[Dan LeBatard]

I have an idea. I'm gonna. I'm gonna. I'm gonna get playful here. Billy Wagner.

[Ethan]

All right, now, we gotta think about something here.

[Chris]

We're drafting the rotation.

[Greg Cody]

Okay?

[Ethan]

We're not drafting a whole bull.

[Guest or Co-host]

No, that's fine.

[Tony]

This is a negative way. So you're saying no, he played the game.

[Ethan]

It was 802 to 443.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, it was dominant.

[Ethan]

Who would be your next pick?

[Dan LeBatard]

Okay, so after Billy Wagner, then, I mean, I might as well go Roger Clemens. Okay, so Clemens, oh, three was, like,

[Ethan]

already back end of his career.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, back end of his career, but still really good.

[Tony]

Still feeling confident.

[Ethan]

So 1356 -1268. That is a total of 88 for Roger Clements.

[Dan LeBatard]

That wasn't.

[Stu Guts]

Loser.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, that wasn't good set. I was gonna go with relievers.

[Tony]

Got a couple names here. Don't really know how I feel about them. Jake Peavey.

[Dan LeBatard]

I love that name.

[Ethan]

Peevey makes me so happy. All right, this is a good score here. Cody 192. Jeremy is at 1103, and Cody is at 490.

[Dan LeBatard]

But see, this is where I'm trying to think. I'm trying to look back at, like, guys from this era. That'll be, like, fun names to say that also actually experience their prime during this run. You know what? I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. One of my favorite pitchers of all time. And even if it doesn't help me

[Ethan]

know who you're going.

[Dan LeBatard]

Roy Oswald.

[Ethan]

Oh, that's not who I was gonna

[Dan LeBatard]

go, but that's a name I like to say. Roy Oswald.

[Ethan]

Cody, you might be back in it. Yeah. So Jeremy Roy Oswald had 1666 strikeouts, but 19.

[Chris]

Oh, no.

[Ethan]

So minus 252. So, Cody, the door is slightly ajar as Jeremy has dropped down to 851. And you were at 490.

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, boy, that was bad.

[Tony]

What's Jeremy at total?

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm at 851.

[Ethan]

851.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm still like. Like, almost 400 strikeouts ahead of you.

[Tony]

Roy Halliday.

[Dan LeBatard]

This is bad news.

[Ethan]

16, 19 strikeouts.

[Tony]

Oh, no.

[Ethan]

2,063 hits.

[Dan LeBatard]

All right, so somehow I still made the better choice.

[Ethan]

I'm negative minus 444.

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, my God.

[Ethan]

Cody, that drops you to 46.

[Dan LeBatard]

So it's going into the final round.

[Ethan]

800.

[Dan LeBatard]

851 to 46.

[Ethan]

Correct.

[Dan LeBatard]

Mike, in honor of Jorge Solaire and Reynaldo Lopez throwing absolute haymakers.

[Chris]

And.

[Dan LeBatard]

And Walt Weiss, by the way, dishing out a tackle.

[Stu Guts]

Yeah, that was playing the. Playing. Playing the Jeff Van Gundy role.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yes, but. But, like, way more effectively. I want. I want your take on this fight. And I also want to know what's. There's so many great baseball brawls over the years. Do you have a favorite?

[Stu Guts]

Yeah, I mean, nothing beats Nolan Ryan and Robin Ventura.

[Mike]

That's.

[Stu Guts]

That's the best one ever by far. Although I will say that if you've. If you've never seen this, this is a. This is a real Gen Xer memory. But if you've never seen Izzy Al contra, the Red Sox minor leaguer in the minors, getting hit by a pitch and then kicking the catcher. Do you know what I'm talking about?

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, I do know what you're talking about. The back kick of the catcher.

[Stu Guts]

It's one of the great. It's maybe the greatest baseball fight move of all. Knows he's going to get drilled. He does. And he immediately just reaches back and puts his cleat right into the catcher's chest guard and knocks him backwards so that the catcher cannot restrain him from charging the mount. What happens after that isn't great. He kind of runs into the middle of the mound and there's like a. It kind of dissolves pretty quickly. There have been some feisty moments already in, like, weeks one and two, though. Like, yeah, Wilson Contreras got hit. Hit again by the Brewers. He's been hit, like a hundred times

[Dan LeBatard]

by the brewers with his brother behind the plate, by the way, which is hilarious. Brother, Perfect note.

[Ethan]

Yeah.

[Stu Guts]

And. And nothing happened. But he announced in a post game press conference that if it happened again, he was going to, and I quote, take someone out, which is awesome. Incredibly, incredibly intimidating thing to say. I mean, I'm glad it happened, if only because the team was 2 and 8 and needed to be woken up desperately. And I'm hoping that his, he's a very intense dude. I'm hoping that his feistiness can wake the team up a little bit.

[Dan LeBatard]

Here's where we go from here, Mike. As you might remember from last year, I blatantly stole from the Lonely island podcast and referring to this as a golden era of Major League Baseball. Stealing that from Seth. So in our golden era of Major League Baseball, we are dishing out a Star of the week every week. I have three potential nominees for you. I want you to pick your favorite of the bunch from this week week in baseball. So reigning National League Rookie of the Year, Drake Baldwin has gotten off to a ridiculous start in Atlanta. I believe he leads the league in both home runs and rsbi. There's Sandy Alcantara, who we've talked about plenty on this show, but was riding a, I believe 21 straight scoreless innings in a row over the last week. It was like 26 or 27 dating back to the beginning of the year before ultimately that, that last game sort of imploded. But he's had had a ridiculous start to this season. Back to Cy Young form. And then there's Joe Adele, who robbed three home runs in one game in which the Angels won one to nothing. Who is your golden era Star of the week.

[Stu Guts]

But it's gotta be Joe Adele. Like, no one's ever done that before. And the third robbery in that photo from the stand looking back at the field is so iconic, it's gonna be around forever.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yep.

[Stu Guts]

The funniest thing about it though, and this is such Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim baseball, is that the Angels, I believe, are still the worst fielding team in the majors after that happened there. They're like six runs below average or something. But yeah, it's got it for, for this weekend baseball Star of the Week type award, you got to give it to the guy who robbed three homers

[Dan LeBatard]

in a game, robbing three home runs in a game. And the one of the greatest baseball photos I've ever seen being take and being taken on a phone by a fan is that incredible part.

[Stu Guts]

Incredible photo and like the kind of thing that, like when there is a montage of, of great moments in like fielding history, there's no way that that doesn't end up in every single one. It's the, it's, it's the new Jeter flying into the stands at Fenway.

[Dan LeBatard]

It does feel that way. It's one of the, it's one of the spectacular plays we've ever seen. One of the spectacular photos. Mike, before I let you go, just three fun baseball names that come to your mind.

[Stu Guts]

Oh, God. Well, I'll go with Izzy Alcantara who did make the majors briefly and never quite. Never quite lived up to his promise. I really love the Tigers right now are loaded. Man. Kevin.

[Dan LeBatard]

So many.

[Stu Guts]

Oh, Kevin McGonagall and Spencer Torkelson hitting back to back. You can't. You can't do better than that. It's like a. It's like a cat got loose on a keyboard and just walked across, like, banged out a bunch of letters. So those would be my three.

[Dan LeBatard]

And you could say it was a Tiger that got loose on that keyboard. Mike.

[Zaslow]

Sure.

[Dan LeBatard]

Thank you very much for joining us on the pitch clock. We'll have you back soon so long as your insane schedule allows it. Thank you. Just because I. I liked watching him pitch and I feel like it. There was a stretch in here.

[Sound/Music Producer or Co-host]

Here.

[Dan LeBatard]

Brandon Webb.

[Ethan]

Brandon Webb. Brandon Webb only pitched from 2003 to 2009. Yeah.

[Chris]

Oh.

[Ethan]

So his career numbers.

[Dan LeBatard]

Brandon. Brandon Webb is essentially the Brandon Roy Small. A small.

[Tony]

A short career for a guy who

[Dan LeBatard]

was as good as he was.

[Ethan]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Dan LeBatard]

Not dissimilar to Josh Johnson.

[Tony]

It's just injuries.

[Dan LeBatard]

I just got hurt.

[Ethan]

So 1065 strikeouts like that minus 1200 hits.

[Dan LeBatard]

All right.

[Ethan]

I like so down to minus 135. So your total, Jeremy. Seven something is 716.

[Tony]

So that means I need a plus six.

[Dan LeBatard]

76. 71. You need 671 to win. Let's see. It's not impossible. You would just need to do better than Randy Johnson.

[Tony]

Can I get two pitchers to do it?

[Dan LeBatard]

If you. If you get two, here's what I'll say. If you get within. If you get within 200, I'll give you a shot. I'll.

[Ethan]

I'll give you a shot at it.

[Depop Announcer]

Cliff Le.

[Ethan]

I like that name.

[Dan LeBatard]

And so. No, I like that. That was actually when I was thinking about the Roy Haliday rotation. Then I was thinking about the Phillies. I was thinking Cole Hamills. And I was thinking Cliff Lee.

[Tony]

You know what?

[Dan LeBatard]

But Hamill's not a huge strikeout guy. I don't think Le.

[Mike]

A big strikeout.

[Stu Guts]

No.

[Greg Cody]

Either.

[Dan LeBatard]

No, but good.

[Tony]

I was more thinking, who's that other freaking lefty?

[Dan LeBatard]

And I couldn't think of Cole Hamils. I also thought couldn't think of Cole Hamil.

[Tony]

Shut your mouth.

[Stu Guts]

All right.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'll see you guys in the next pitch clock. See you, Tony. Thanks for stopping by. Let's.

[Ethan]

Let's get Tony to play on the next clock.

[Tony]

Trust anything. This guy, whenever he's into baseball, I don't trust him.

[Ethan]

Ah, Cody, it was a valiant effort. All right, 1085.

[Tony]

Okay, so it's way more than that.

[Ethan]

Minus 1419.

[Dan LeBatard]

I had, like, multiple, so you finished way negative.

[Tony]

The other two names I had on here, the other two names I had on here that I didn't end up guessing were Jason Schmidt and Greg Maddox.

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, I like those. I. I don't know if Maddox was a enough of a strikeout.

[Ethan]

Minus the final score was 716 to negative 288.

[Dan LeBatard]

So that went really well.

[Depop Announcer]

Close.

[Mike Scher]

Yeah.

[Dan LeBatard]

All right, so he would have been right there. I want to end this with a quick story, which is that when I was playing Little league baseball, my dad was the coach, and he would give out awards to the team at the end of every season. And we were the Athletics one year, and Barry Zito was my absolute favorite player. And so rather than giving his own son the Cy Young Award or the mvp, he made up the Barry Zito Award.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Dan LeBatard]

And I framed it, and it was great. And I know.

[Ethan]

I'm sure all the kids on your team loved you, dude.

[Dan LeBatard]

I know.

[Ethan]

Coach's kid got the Barry Zito.

[Dan LeBatard]

Hey, man, I didn't win the Cy Young or the MVP. He was trying to be fair.

[Tony]

How many BZ's you got?

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, how many BZ's? Yeah, I got one.

[Mike Scher]

It was one.