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Tony
Amazon presents Jeff vs. Taco Truck Salsa. Whether it's verde roja or the orange one, for Jeff, trying any salsa is like playing Russian roulette with a flamethrower. Luckily, Jeff saved with Amazon and stocked up on antacids, ginger tea, and milk. Habanero. More like habanero. Yes. Save the everyday with Amazon. This is the Dan Levator show with the Stugats podcast.
Dave Damaszek
Yes.
Jonathan Zaslow
We did it, everybody. It's Friday. We made it. Come on. A round of applause for making it to Friday.
Mike Ryan
What a week, huh?
Jonathan Zaslow
We did it. The weekend starts in a few hours. Everybody knows when we get done here on a Friday, everybody's weekend starts. Let's say hello to Dave Damaszek, who we missed last week. Dave is back. Hello, Dave.
Dave Damaszek
Hello. I am already drunk to start the weekend, and I have already departed the planet Earth. Much like the astronauts looking down at the big blue marble, I, too am up on cloud nine beyond the astronauts. Thanks to number 87 and company in black and gold, the Pittsburgh Penguins are back in the playoffs. I know our world is fraught, but it has been a great journey with these Penguins into these play.
Jonathan Zaslow
All right, well, we'll let you have your fun. We're not starting with the Penguins. Okay. We'll let you have your fun. I just did.
Dave Damaszek
Too late.
Jonathan Zaslow
We'll let you have your fun with the Penguins. But since. Since Dave wasn't here last Friday, I was away on vacation last week. I came back on Friday. I did the Friday show, which is kind of weird. Like. Like you would admit the people who go on vacation then come back to work for Friday, and. And then you have the weekend. Like. Like, what are you doing? That is kind of weird, you know, And I. I pulled that move last week. But the reason that I pulled that move last week, Dave, is very confused with my vacation ending early last week. This is something that's. That I guess has been bothering you for a week because we haven't spoken to you.
Dave Damaszek
Yes. By the way, that leads neatly to a promotion for Football America coming up as soon as this show is done. Football America and our guest, Jonathan Zaslow, we figure out the greatest and worst first overall pick in NFL and in sports history. It's a fun conversation. Looking forward to that. But in the meantime, yes, Zaz. Very strange. That seemed to me that hit me like, oh, yeah, Zaz came back early from vacation. I was like, oh, okay, wait, wait a minute. People actually do that? Because it's something I feel like I hear about in TV shows and movies. I didn't know, real human beings actually pulled the plug on. On a vacation. It's kind of like leaving a movie early. People use that as a. As a point of reference. I thought it was a figurative thing, but people actually leave vacations in the movies early.
Jonathan Zaslow
Well, the first thing that I would say is, have you never been on a vacation where, like, let's say it's a long vacation, okay? You know, seven days, like, at least a week. You've never been on vacation, Dave, where you're like, I'm ready to go home. You know, like, I. I get like that with every vacation. I don't leave every vacation early. All right? But I get that with every vacation where I'm like, it'll get to, like, day five or six, and I'm like, I'm. I'm ready to go home. I like being at home. You know, that doesn't happen to you.
Dave Damaszek
I like being at home. There. There. We park our cars in the same garage of our home, I guess. But no, I can't say that I've ever had the feeling of, like, yeah, let's wrap this thing up. Let's wrap up the. The leisure time in the fun and sun. Let's get out of here already. Enough.
Mike Ryan
I've probably been on a vacation of seven days where. Day five or six, I'm like, all right, I'm ready to go home, but
Jonathan Zaslow
I'm not going to leave.
Mike Ryan
I'm still going to stick it out. Like, I might have the thought of, okay, I am ready to go home, but I'm never going to punt. It's a super Boomer thing to do. Like, can we just.
Jonathan Zaslow
Let's just leave.
Mike Ryan
We're going to leave to go home. Well, what's at home?
Dave Damaszek
Well, what.
Mike Ryan
You live at home.
Jonathan Zaslow
Okay, but, like, but if I'm ready to go home, why don't I go home?
Mike Ryan
Did you not pay for the last day?
Jonathan Zaslow
Well, on this trip, I didn't. I stayed in a friend's house. She. She gave us her townhouse in, you know, Colorado. So it's not like I lost, but
Mike Ryan
if you pay for something, I mean, I'm not going to not get it. Like, I'm coming home with something.
Jonathan Zaslow
Well, I did this, you guys may recall, all right, very famously, a year ago this time, I was. I rented a cabin in North Carolina. The Florida Panthers lost game one of the Stanley Cup Final, and I put the Zazlows in the car the next morning. I said, it's time to drive because my team needs me. We got to get home for game number two.
Mike Ryan
Wife must hate you.
Jonathan Zaslow
And what do you know? The Panthers, not only did they win game two, but they won the series. Matter of fact, Paul, Maurice, you guys may remember, a few months ago, he thanked me for my service. All right? I had to. I had to do my part, and I ended that vacation early. Dave Damascus, like, as well.
Dave Damaszek
I think this is weirdo behavior, though. And by the way, so you're so ready to leave that you're willing to take active measures, like booking your. Changing your flight. That's a small thing. That's a pain in the ass. You actually devoted 20 minutes, 45 minutes. Like, let's wrap this up. And part of the time that's left in this vacation that I'm trying to truncate will be devoted to me. Changing on the laptop, right? The phone, changing our flight plans.
Jonathan Zaslow
That's weirdo behavior. Well, last year was easier because we drove to and from North Carolina. So it's like, we packed the car the next morning, it's time to go home. The Panthers need us. But last week, I said to my wife, the day before we ended up leaving, I was like, you want to see if we can get on the flight out tomorrow and just go home? Like, we're ready, right? It seems like this is just your thing.
Mike Ryan
Like, your wife probably knows. All right? We're going to plan for eight days.
Jonathan Zaslow
She was ready, too.
Mike Ryan
Zaz is going to do that thing after six, and so we're going to. Does your wife call you Szaz?
Jonathan Zaslow
No, she doesn't call me Zaz. John. No, she doesn't call me John either, because that's not my name. Yes. I didn't think you were gonna guess it, but you did on the third try. You got it, schmuckem. You were right. You got it. That's what she called me.
Dave Damaszek
Well, what does she call. Did she call you Jonathan?
Jonathan Zaslow
She calls me Babe. Hell, yeah, dude. That's right, dog. That's right. That's how we roll.
Dave Damaszek
And you go Babe back.
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah, yeah. So, you know, if we both say
Dave Damaszek
at the same time, not a big fan of that. Not a big fan of that. Out in the wild. Hey, check this out. Babe. What are you looking at there? Babe? That's. I, I, I.
Jonathan Zaslow
No, no, no. We don't do that. We don't do it, like, out in public. I say her name in public, you know, for, you know, shouting across her, hey, Babe. Like, no, no, no. There could be multiple babes in the room. If that's the case, I Don't know. By the way, the kids.
Dave Damaszek
The kids. The kids are cool with. With. With the plug. Being pulled on vacations all the time. They must think their old man's a wacko.
Jonathan Zaslow
Doesn't even bring his.
Dave Damaszek
Better not settle in here.
Jonathan Zaslow
One of his kids didn't even go on the. This vacation last week. We left one of them home. That is true.
Dave Damaszek
What the hell goes on?
Jonathan Zaslow
We. He. Look, he's 17 years old. He's a big boy, you know, if he wanted to stay back instead of coming. Stay back player, you know, so we. We. We. We left him home. Yes, that is true. But apparently I'm the only one.
Dave Damaszek
50, 50 chance the old man's gonna want to come home early anyway. Why are you even bothered?
Jonathan Zaslow
That's right, man.
Dave Damaszek
This zazzle's a weird fella.
Jonathan Zaslow
I think if there's nothing else that we've learned, it's that I run the show. When I'm ready to go home, it's time to go home. All right, you tell them, babe. So the Miami Heat last night got crushed in Toronto. Who didn't see that coming?
Tony
Brandon Ingram kills this team, huh?
Jonathan Zaslow
The Heat, Mike. The Heat were. They lost both these last two games home and home with Toronto Tuesday, Thursday. That's a home and home. Both games were in Toronto. Their home. That's a home and home.
Mike Ryan
Is that on a baseball series?
Jonathan Zaslow
They lost both games in Toronto, which means they were swept all four games this season by Toronto, which also means two teams who are, like, right above them in the playoff race. The heater, 10th. And we'll get to that in a second. How they're most likely locked into 10th, and they're going to have to win two road games just against the playoffs, which they will not do because they're a terrible road team. But the Heat this year against Toronto and Orlando are oh and nine. What the fuck?
Tony
That's. That's not cream of the crop. Exactly. In the east, that's not the teams that you thought. Well, that Heat fans mostly thought they'd be competing with.
Jonathan Zaslow
I mean, the teams that are fifth and seventh in the east here, not the teams that are first and second. The teams that are fifth and seventh are oh and nine.
Tony
Yeah, it's a disastrous season. It was a disastrous evaluation at the trade deadline to think that they had enough to not either capitulate or add to this team. To think that the way that the roster was constituted following their failed pursuit of Giannis was good enough to help their chances in the offseason to acquire a star like Giannis. I don't. Look, it's been misguided. It's been misguided for years. I'm not going to be a broken record about it. We move on to the off season, hopefully here, and, you know, maybe it works out for them this time.
Mike Ryan
Not only that, you're looking at the teams ahead of the Miami Heat, Charlotte and nine. Do you have any faith that the Heat would beat the Charlotte Hornets right
Jonathan Zaslow
now on the road?
Tony
No, just, like, how do I like my chances this season? You look at the teams ahead of you and they have nicer pieces. You'd rather be them. And this is a franchise that always hung its hat on not only being able to compete, but also having foresight,
Jonathan Zaslow
and they've shown no foresight the last couple.
Dave Damaszek
Yeah.
Mike Ryan
And that's what I'm talking about.
Tony
And they're not competing.
Mike Ryan
And looking at the teams directly ahead of you this season, it's like going towards the future. You like the Hornets pieces Really, really well. You like the SEC, the 76ers. You like what they've got, the magic.
Jonathan Zaslow
I don't know.
Mike Ryan
You like edgecover? Maxi?
Tony
At least they have maxi. Well, you could point to my edge.
Mike Ryan
Yeah, it's really good.
Jonathan Zaslow
Okay. But I guess. I guess the place that I'm looking at there is they're never going to win anything with Joel Embiid on the books. And he's not going anywhere because he's under contract for four more years. And by the way, he just had surgery for appendicitis, so he's going to miss the remainder of the season. That, like, they're completely screwed. Go ahead.
Mike Ryan
Magic pieces, I like Von Caro better. France, Franz Wagner, I like him better. The Hawks, I like all their pieces better. And the Raptors, like, just put a steamroller to the Miami Heat.
Jonathan Zaslow
Well, so. So that brings me to the next question. Where the Heat are going to pursue Giannis again this summer.
Tony
By the way, Brandon Ingram, another one of those not so sexy names that were rumored to have the Heat in the mix for that. The Heat just right.
Jonathan Zaslow
Like, what did Toronto give up for Brandon England? What they have to give up.
Tony
It wasn't much, and everyone likes to remember the Donovan Mitchell's, the Kevin Durant pursuits, the, you know, all the failed Whale pursuits. But there have also been little small pieces like Pascal Siaka, OG Anunoby, Brandon Ingram, guys that have made a difference that Miami has also failed to either pursue or decided that's not worth it. We're either aiming higher or we don't think that this person can help our team.
Mike Ryan
Last year they traded Brandon Ingram for Bruce Brown. Kelly Olenek, a 26 first rounder via Indy and a 2031 second round pick.
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah.
Mike Ryan
And he got an extension. Three years, 100.
Jonathan Zaslow
So that's a perfect example of why couldn't we do that Perfect. And Siakam's another great one. Like what? That's all you get? Why couldn't we do that?
Tony
And the theory is we didn't want to do that because we were aiming higher.
Jonathan Zaslow
Well, you always have that flexibility, even though they never do anything with the flexibility.
Tony
You think Toront, who is who just beat up on the Miami Heat back to back games are like, man, this Brandon Ingram trade really hurt our flexibility.
Jonathan Zaslow
Like no one else seems to care about flexibility the way the Heat care about flexibility. And the Heat never do anything with it.
Tony
And they somehow don't have the assets that the teams they're competing against have. You know why? Because when they develop these talents, they get something for them in seasons that they realize that they don't have a shot at a title for. So again, we're in broken record territory. I this is not one of those things that I love being right about. I'm a Miami Heat fan and I want the Miami Heat to finally cash in their chips and get back to relevancy. This has been an abysmal three years for me because Miami Heat are the worst thing you can be in that sport. Not a threat in the playoffs and not a lottery team. Let's just move on and hope it works out. There's always that shift after college hoops ends where you think things are going to slow down and instead it's just different sports pulling you in. Now it's baseball. Every night you swear you're only half watching and then suddenly you're locked into the seventh inning. Then you flip over, it's the cars making left turns for three hours and somehow you're locked in. This was me actually, the other night. I told myself I just stay home, keep it casual. Then my buddy, college Mike texted me, hey, come through, we've got everything on. And I said, yeah. I picked up a pack of Miller Lite on the way. The next thing you know, we've got multiple screens going. Everybody's locked in on something different. And the whole night just builds and builds to one of those moments where you take a sip, you look around and realize, yeah, this was the right call. Cheers to legendary moments with Miller lite. Great taste. 96 calories go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. And sports championships aren't one alone the one with the right people around you. That's exactly what Intuit TobleTax brings to taxes. With Toboltax Expert full service, match with
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Mike Ryan
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Dave Damaszek
Is this, may I ask, as an outsider here is Babe Zaslow. Is the state of Miami sports overall so bad that he would consider walking out on it right now? No, from a D. This is the worst. I mean, I, I'm off the top of my head. This is a pretty bleak spot that you are in if you're a Miami sports fan.
Tony
I know you're feeling yourself because your friends made the playoffs, but the, the Panthers are going to be right in the mix with the title favorites next year.
Dave Damaszek
They're not in the playoffs. The Miami Marlins, everybody makes the playoffs in the NBA and the NHL and your two teams aren't in them. The Dolphins, you know, right now, you know, as we sit here in April, are out of it. They are. They are not in contention. They'll give you the Dolphins. They're not in contention.
Tony
We'll give you the Dolphins. What are the mar.
Jonathan Zaslow
What are.
Tony
The Marlins are. Are feisty fighting fish.
Jonathan Zaslow
Way to fight back and split a four game series, Marlin.
Tony
Yeah, yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
Look, look, look.
Dave Damaszek
I like it. See, I backed into a corner and look who's ready to fight.
Tony
Yeah. Over the last hundred games, Dave Damaschek, the Miami Marlin. Stop trying alpha me. Look at me, Dave.
Dave Damaszek
Stop trying alpha me.
Tony
Over the last hundred games, the Miami Marlins have the same record as the world champion Dodgers. Them fighting fish, they might be for real. And if you don't think it's a good time, if you don't think it's a good time to be a sports fan in Miami, why don't I come and grab you and take you by the neck to green tree so you can see the title favorite Miami Hurricanes and see a superstar like Malachi.
Jonathan Zaslow
Tony, you know about that green tree.
Tony
And also Lionel Messi plays in this town. Lionel Messi plays in this town.
Dave Damaszek
All right, good for you. See, this is what you were getting. Down in the dumps. All of you in that. In there. We're all, oh, broken record, the heat, I'm getting tired. All flexibility. They never do it. Then an outsider, an interloper comes in and insult you. All of a sudden you. You found your salt. I loved it. See, look, damage served a purpose.
Jonathan Zaslow
The Panthers lost.
Dave Damaszek
I reminded you who you were.
Jonathan Zaslow
The Panthers lost last night to 51 in Ottawa. But I like, I don't. I'm going to miss watching the Panthers in the postseason this year because just, I mean the Panthers made the had made the postseason a franchise record five consecutive years. I don't count 20, 20 when they let 12 teams in because of COVID That's bullshit. Because they wouldn't have made the playoffs if they didn't do that. So five straight years franchise record, they made the playoffs, three straight Stanley cup finals and they become like the first team ever to win back to back championships and not make the postseason the next. Although in, certainly in, in the NBA that happened with the Bulls. So this is the first time that it's ever happened with hockey, I guess. Yes.
Dave Damaszek
Dave, will you or anyone in the. In South Florida watch the Stanley cup playoffs without your team? Oh, because Chuck. Oh, don't say so. I'm be legitimately, you know, Kachuk and Captain America and all that kind of stuff all sounds great. But do you check out now that the Panthers aren't relevant in this spring in the chase for the Cup?
Tony
You're talking to the wrong crew.
Jonathan Zaslow
I'm glad that you asked that, Dave, because I don't know if you are.
Tony
Tony didn't watch at all when they were winning.
Mike Ryan
Exactly right.
Jonathan Zaslow
Dave.
Mike Ryan
I haven't seen a second of ice hockey.
Jonathan Zaslow
Nothing changes.
Tony
And the rest of us, we love puck, especially playoff.
Jonathan Zaslow
I'm glad that, I'm glad that you brought that update because yesterday I don't know why Dan said this yesterday. Like Dan made a point to, to, to look and point at me and make the point that with the Panthers not in the playoffs this year, I'm not going to be watching the Stanley Cup. I don't know. Like I didn't push back because he was in the middle of a point. You know, it's like whatever. But I don't know why he accused
Tony
me of that postseason in sports.
Jonathan Zaslow
Do you remember that, Roy? Like he.
Tony
Yes, absolutely.
Jonathan Zaslow
I know, I know Zaslow is not going to be watching now because I'm like what are you talking about, bandwagon fan? I used to pointing in that direction
Mike Ryan
and just saying something like that.
Jonathan Zaslow
Oh yeah, yeah.
Tony
You were wearing an ill fitting Panther shirt at the time.
Jonathan Zaslow
How dare you. So back to the Heat. All right. This summer they're certainly going to go after Giannis again. And did you see by the way, tonight's the Bucks. So tonight's the Milwaukee Bucks home finale. Everybody in the NBA plays tonight and then everybody plays on Sunday. Two games left for everybody and then the playoffs start. The Bucks home finale is tonight. And there was thought that because of what could take place in the summer, are the Bucks going to let Giannis play? Because he wants to play apparently and he wants to play with his brothers. So maybe just kind of as a goodwill deal, they'll let him play tonight. Well, they've already ruled him out, so he's not playing tonight and he's going to go into the off season. Source he didn't get to play with his brothers. The Heat are certainly going to go after Giannis again this summer. What happens if slash when the Heat don't acquire Giannis again this summer? Because last year, you know, they, they, they lost in historic fashion in the first round and embarrassment in the first round of the playoffs. Last year they vowed to come back better. They come back worse. They're going to finish 10th. They're most likely going to miss the playoffs altogether. If they strike out on Giannis this summer. How can you possibly rationalize bringing back the same group?
Tony
So if they strike out on Giannis, is Giannis a Catch all for a superstar that is either as good or better than Bam out of bio or do they miss out on that entirely?
Jonathan Zaslow
What does that mean, a catch?
Tony
All right, like a superstar? Because somebody who could be there could be somebody else available. That's not Giannis that comes to the Miami Heat that improves them. Like I'm not all in on Giannis,
Jonathan Zaslow
but has to be someone better than Bam.
Tony
Yeah, well, someone as good or better than Bam in terms of improving this team's prospects. If they fail to do that, then I think you, you take a hard look at rebuilding because we have three years worth of data saying that this core is not good enough. They're not. Something's not going to all of a sudden flip on with this team. I don't think there's any more steps for Tyler Hero to take. Respectfully, I. Maybe you have some of your developmental guys, but is that enough to compete with even like the Orlando's of the world at that point the franchise for really like the first time ever going into a season because when they had the number two pick, Zaz, when they ended up with Michael Beasley, that team had Dwyane Wade on it. That was not the plan for, for them to be bad that year. I think there's a real good chance that it's the first season the Miami Heat finally look at themselves and Say, you know, we're. We're not going to be competing for a title this year. How do we set ourselves up? That would be pretty shocking.
Mike Ryan
So a rebuilding year after a great historic draft of this season, you're going to go to next season where there's not going to be a historic draft and try to rebuild. I know, like that that was the play this year. Instead of going 42 and 40 or 40, what are they going to go? 41 and 40. 41.
Jonathan Zaslow
Basically 41 and 39 right now. Like, they're probably going to win their final two games. Like, they're going to win 43. Tonight they have Washington, and then Sunday they have Atlanta, although Atlanta likely is going to need that game on Sunday because Atlanta could still drop to 7, which you want to avoid. So they'll win at least 40 games. It looks like 40. Excuse me, 42, which is 42 and
Mike Ryan
40 at the beginning of the season. We look at 42 and 40 would be like, yeah, not. Not good enough, obviously, but not worth. Exactly. What's going on is keeping all these guys together, not making a move at the deadline, not trying to move these expiring contracts.
Jonathan Zaslow
Well, and we could agree the worst case scenario is if not only do the Heat not acquire Giannis in the summer, but if Milwaukee doesn't trade him. Because then this story continues into next year, Right. Like, if the Heat are not going to acquire Giannis, the Heat fan really needs Milwaukee to trade him somewhere else then, right?
Mike Ryan
Yeah, because then you're looking at the same story at the deadline next season, and we're all like, oh, come on. Like, this could be it. He could finally show up here in the Heat, and it's. And it's just not going to happen.
Jonathan Zaslow
Yes, that's the worst thing that can possibly happen. And by the way, but also, don't
Dave Damaszek
you also think, just from the outside perspective, Giannis is 31 years of age. Are you sure that this is the solve question, all your issues?
Jonathan Zaslow
It's a good question. He's going to have you get him.
Dave Damaszek
I know there will be a great celebration and star power and all of that, but what does it add up to for you?
Jonathan Zaslow
Totally fair question now. Totally fair question. He's played less than 40 games this year, and he's going to be 32 soon. And. And by the way, based on the last couple of years, I think it's okay to question whether or not Giannis can carry a team because they have not been good with him in the lineup. And matter of fact, I Think in his like because he's been hurt some in the playoffs the last years, there's something like 1 in 9 in the last 10 playoff games that he's played in. And I think that's probably, I think that's a little bit of what you're referring to.
Tony
Mike Zaz from that recent article. We know that the Miami Heat had the strongest offer amongst the teams that were pursuing Giannis. They do deserve some credit for that. They were, they were willing to do something that hurt. But part of that was we have bam. Now we have this team now, the postseason just a couple months away. Giannis is of a certain age. This is disease on this moment. Who's to say that Milwaukee can fetch the same kind of offer? Would Miami even offer the same kind of thing? Or does the desperation finally get to them that, you know, there's self awareness, realizing we're presently a nowhere franchise right now, Same offer, maybe even improve it.
Jonathan Zaslow
The Heater. The Heater almost, almost assured the number 10 spot, which would mean you have to after losing last night, which would mean you have to win two roads games to make the postseason. And I say that because the only way out of the 10 spot for Miami. The Heat would have to win their final two games, which includes tonight at Washington. Okay, they should. And Sunday against Atlanta in a game Atlanta is likely going to need. That's going to be a very tough game. The Heat would have to win both those games and they would need the Sixers to lose their final two. The Sixers have Indiana and Milwaukee, two teams that are not trying. But again, you got the embiid situation. So I don't know. My guess is the Sixers probably win at least one of those games. And the Hornets. The Hornets would have to lose their final two games as well. They play Detroit and New York. Detroit I would assume is sitting guys tonight because they're locked into number one. But New York likely has something to play for on Sunday. So that's why I say it's almost for sure that the Heat are going to finish number 10 and have to win two road games to make the postseason really, really disappointing.
Tony
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Dave Damaszek
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Mike Ryan
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Dave Damaszek
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Tony
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Dave Damaszek
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Tony
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Jonathan Zaslow
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Tony
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Jonathan Zaslow
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Tony
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Jonathan Zaslow
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Tony
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Jonathan Zaslow
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Mike Ryan
Boys could take breakfast and give our meal the rest of the day.
Jonathan Zaslow
It is an honor to share.
Mike Ryan
No, it's our honor.
Jonathan Zaslow
It is our larger honor. No, really stop.
Tony
You can really feel the respect in this battle. Pick a meal to pick a side
Jonathan Zaslow
a participate in McDonald's while supplies last.
Tony
You tell yourself no one wants your college era band tees, but on Depop, people are searching for exactly what you've got. You once paid a small fortune for them at merch stands. Now a teenager who calls them vintage will offer that same small fortune back. Sell them easily on Depop. Just snap a few photos and we'll take care of the rest. Who knew your questionable music taste would be a money making machine? Your style can make you cash. Start selling on Depop, where taste recognizes taste.
Jonathan Zaslow
Don LeBatard our Panther group chat. We're confident against the lighting.
Mike Ryan
This is a different team.
Jonathan Zaslow
You're a Panther group chat.
Mike Ryan
No, no, I think no. But dude, you're so wrong on that. We' been terrified of this team forever and I think there's a different energy where the Panthers, they want the Lightning sts.
Tony
I want T shirts made for this Panther run. What could be this Panther run?
Jonathan Zaslow
Our Panther group chat. We're not afraid of the lightning.
Tony
That's a Tagline for World Raw 3.
Jonathan Zaslow
This is the Dan Levatar show with the ST Gods. So this weekend though, tomorrow night, Tony, UFC Miami.
Mike Ryan
Zaz, me and you will be in the building. Lewis will be there too. We'll be doing a little bit of content from the fights. Very exciting. Your son's gonna get you there early, I heard.
Jonathan Zaslow
So. So Mike, I like. I'm a super casual UFC fan. Like really, really casual. My son loves it. He's 17, he's way into it. Dave loves UFC, knows all the fighters, watches every single week, orders every single, you know, pay per view, whatever it is now Paramount.
Mike Ryan
We don't have to order anything, Right?
Jonathan Zaslow
Right.
Mike Ryan
Turn it on and bam, it's there.
Jonathan Zaslow
That's a good deal. So. So we're going. I got set up with the tickets, and I'm super appreciative of that. We're going tomorrow night, but my son, like. So apparently with the new deal with Paramount, they're doing a solid to us folks on the east coast, really are. The show started, the main Card starts at 9 Eastern Time, also known as Lord's time zone, starts at 9pm now, not 10. That's a big difference. Okay, That's a big difference. But my son, he's like, we got to get there for the prelims.
Mike Ryan
He's right.
Jonathan Zaslow
He wants to leave the house at
Tony
5pm I mean, it's a long day at the fights.
Jonathan Zaslow
That's a very long night for your boy here.
Mike Ryan
Yeah, but, Zaz, you're going to miss Kelvin Gastelum versus Vicente Luque. He can't do that.
Tony
Gastelum's on the prelims?
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah.
Tony
What happened to him?
Dave Damaszek
This is what happens when you have irrelevant NBA and NHL teams. You're left to watch men in bare feet sweat on each other.
Mike Ryan
What are you on about?
Dave Damaszek
What do you want? About.
Tony
Don't sell us short, Dave. We can be bandwagon about the ufc, too. This was consistently a good market for the last few years for the ufc. They're having a hard time selling these.
Jonathan Zaslow
Oh, it's not going to be a great crowd there.
Tony
There's plenty of tickets still available, which is why, in this market, I saw Dana doing some local media stuff that Yuri's been in town for basically a month, hitting up every media outlet, the ticket situation. And I got to admit, I love Yuri. I think that's a. He's a great UFC fighter, but he's. He's known. If you follow the ufc, casual fans, I'm not sure are all that familiar. The UFC cards in years prior down here in Miami were always bad. No, I'm top tier since they came back.
Jonathan Zaslow
Oh, yeah. When they came back, first started doing.
Tony
Yeah, this was a market that they avoided.
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah.
Tony
And then a couple years ago, they came back here and struck gold, and they had great cards. This is easily the weakest card the UFC.
Jonathan Zaslow
Is that true, Tony?
Mike Ryan
100%. Two years ago, we had Izzy get his lick back against Alex Pereira after he knocked him out over in New York, which was insane. So that was a great one. Then last year, we had Sugar Sean vs Cheeto Vero, where Sean hit him with a L with a knee to the orbital bone that sounded like a crack bat.
Jonathan Zaslow
That was at the night that Patty Pimblett also Fought here.
Mike Ryan
That was. I'm think. I think so. I think so.
Jonathan Zaslow
On that, I went to that.
Mike Ryan
Okay, the, the issue with this one is there is flux in a couple different divisions. Light heavyweight being one of them, where Alex Pereira, who's notorious, you know, probably the biggest star in MMA right now, that was his division. He's since moved up to the heavyweight division, trying to get the three weight belt. Like I said on Monday, with Luke Thomas, now that he's in the heavyweight division, there's a. There's a hole, there's a vacuum at the light heavyweight. They brought in Yuri Prohaska. He's going to be fighting Carlos Ulberg. When you talk about Yuri being casuals, not knowing Yuri, I think casuals know Yuri more so because of stuff on social media.
Tony
He does look the hijinks. When he had the top. When he had the top, Ponytail Dave,
Jonathan Zaslow
you know that fool?
Dave Damaszek
No, I know nothing about it.
Mike Ryan
Don't bring up Dave. Damage the bare feet. Dave Damek down there, who cares about him? He's got bare feet on right now. He doesn't even have socks and shoes on right now. In his home.
Dave Damaszek
Grown men are just tangled up with each other, sweating on each other, not even a sock to. To split between two of them. What do you want? Double fat? I'd rather. I'd rather watch the golf. How about that? I bet you would.
Mike Ryan
That's not what we're talking about right now.
Dave Damaszek
You guys are in Florida. You're not talking about the master.
Mike Ryan
I don't care about the masters. Yuri Prohaska is looking for a light heavyweight title. What are you talking about? The issue was also that the flyweight title was removed from the card. So there was supposed to be a flyweight title attached to this, which would have been the co main event. Joshua Van got hurt. They moved that over to next month with Hamza Chimaya versus Sean Strickland, which is going to be a banger up at the Prudential center in Jersey. So with all that now you're looking at, even though there's some good fights on this card, you lack the top heaviness of a UFC card that would have, like Miami would have two titles on the line. But you're talking About Tatiana Suarez vs. Lupi Godins. Good fight. Matus Gamna vs. Esteban Rebovic. Good fight. Then you get into the main card. You got Kevin Holland vs. Randy Brown, rude Boy. But I wanted to see if you saw this and this would draw you in.
Jonathan Zaslow
Zaz, go on.
Mike Ryan
Kevin Holland, the trailblazer who's fought 30,000 times in the last three years. He's one of the UFC's most active fighters. He's a guy that's on social media 24 7, a very good talker, very good promoter. This is what I want you to see. He fought a guy named Daniel Rodriguez who has been in a Tijuana prison for the last eight months, and he bailed him out. Listen to this.
Jonathan Zaslow
What?
Tony
I know there's one you want to get back, and I know there's a guy that's been missing recently.
Jonathan Zaslow
He recently posted on social media. So D Rod is back.
Tony
I don't know if he's fighting.
Jonathan Zaslow
I don't know what that scenario is,
Tony
but he seems to be around.
Mike Ryan
I build him out, man. I bailed him out. I needed to get this dub right here, and then I needed to fight D Rod, so I had to bail him out. That way he can get through all this probation period, and then when it's time for me to fight again, he'll be ready.
Jonathan Zaslow
So we get through Randy Brown.
Tony
It's immediate D Rod call out in the octagon.
Mike Ryan
Oh, 100%. 100%. I mean, I went back and watched that fight. I don't know how the. I lost that, but, yeah, run that back two or three more times. I don't care. It was a fun fight, too. The fans had to have had a blast. We had blood in the octagon.
Jonathan Zaslow
We had knockdowns. We had all the good stuff.
Tony
I don't believe him.
Mike Ryan
So my question to you. Do you believe him? He's been in a Tijuana prison for eight months. He's shown the videos of him working out in a Tijuana prison and basically everything.
Jonathan Zaslow
And this fight's tomorrow.
Mike Ryan
No, no, no. So he's fighting Randy Rudeboy Brown, and then he bailed him out so that he can get ready for the fight that would be next. So if. If Kevin Holland beats Randy Brown, he's going to call out Daniel Rodriguez.
Jonathan Zaslow
So do I believe that he bailed
Mike Ryan
him out out of a Tijuana prison that he's been in for the last eight months?
Jonathan Zaslow
Do we have any idea what Bale is like in Tijuana?
Mike Ryan
I feel like you can do it pretty easily.
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah, that's why that. That's my point. So I'm gonna go 400 bucks. Yes. I'm gonna say yes.
Dave Damaszek
I mean, all right, maybe. Maybe this is enough to turn me around.
Jonathan Zaslow
All right, Dave Daniels, we're talking about
Dave Damaszek
De Niro and Cape Fear. Getting sprung to get into the octagon.
Tony
Now I'm in, right?
Mike Ryan
So he's there, he's there and he's like, you know what? I'm gonna bail you out so you have enough time to get a fight camp in because he beat him earlier this seat this year. So he's going to try to get that lick back on the back end here. But, Zaz, have you ever wanted something so bad you'd bail somebody out to go kick their ass later on?
Jonathan Zaslow
No, Like, I, I don't. I've never faced a situation like that where, you know, someone I need something from needs to be bailed out of jail. I don't know what to go kick into bail. How about, how about, how about.
Dave Damaszek
Can I. I'm sorry to interrupt you, Tony. I don't know how you perform. Credit to you talk about bailing. Mike Ryan can't even be bothered to listen to you. He's texting while you're talking.
Mike Ryan
That's fine.
Tony
But he's locked in on UFC Masters week, Dano. He's.
Mike Ryan
He's locked in on ufc. He knows the players, he knows the game.
Tony
I mean, I got to see what the Miz thinks about, about McIntyre's first
Dave Damaszek
round, but Kevin Hart and the Miz are putting their heads together to figure out who's going to be in contention on the back nine of them on Sunday.
Mike Ryan
Second nine.
Tony
We were, we were so careful because we've played golf with the Miz and Tahoe. We like the Miz around these parts, but the guy was absolutely held up by the rest of the nation as the cause of this is what's wrong with the Masters coverage. And I felt so bad for him because he was just one of many different celebrities they brought through. But I guess the Miz was the tipping point for many folks.
Jonathan Zaslow
And he's a golf guy, so in
Mike Ryan
his mind, he's like, I'll go to
Jonathan Zaslow
the Masters, be awesome.
Mike Ryan
Then he gets there and everyone's like, what the hell?
Jonathan Zaslow
Well, he's like the designated guy in wwe. We know espn, wwe, they have the relationship and, and they're certainly trying to push the, the ESPN app and WWE WrestleManias next weekend. Miz is the guy who does all of the promotion. Like, I had him on set with me for the national championship for espn. Ray, he does all of this stuff for wwe. He's a great ambassador. But yeah, you're right. Like, it seemed like the Miz, all
Tony
the articles, if you Google search the Miz right now, it's golfers up in arms that they had to watch the Miz instead of, you know, Novak on the third hole.
Dave Damaszek
Yeah, well, and also Jason Kelsey too. Don't leave him out of this conversation. It's all added up to like, hey, the executives have seeded any sort of creative, actual creative input to just who are the most famous people we can put on location and point the camera at. That's basically where we've arrived. And there are 29 names in total that will satisfy the executives. And apparently Jason Kelsey and Kevin Hart. And now the Miz makes that group. It's a, it's a couple dozen people that are relevant and if they aren't there, it doesn't matter.
Jonathan Zaslow
Dave had such a funny tweet yesterday and every time I look at it, it makes me laugh.
Tony
What did he say?
Jonathan Zaslow
All right, all out. Dave responded yesterday. There's, there's this tweet that was out there with a picture of Will Smith and Jada Pinkett and it says Will Smith and Jada and Jada Pinkett, by the way, who seems to an evil woman anyway. Will Smith. Whatever.
Tony
Will Smith seems great.
Mike Ryan
I'm with you.
Tony
I'm with you. Will Smith seems great.
Jonathan Zaslow
Whatever Will Smith. The tweet says. And it's a picture of Will Smith and Jada Pinkett and it says Will Smith and Jada Pinkett are reportedly getting a divorce. And Dave Damascik quote tweets it. Why
Dave Damaszek
it was very funny. He had to be there. I like Mike Ryan's response. Will Smith. Smith seems great.
Jonathan Zaslow
Every time I look at it, it
Tony
makes me laugh at his head on straight. Seems, seems like he's a real nice guy.
Dave Damaszek
Don't you have to defend your fellow bald and Jada Pink if there's that.
Jonathan Zaslow
See, that's trouble. That's what God has alopecia. That's going to get you in trouble. Keep his ex wife name out your mouth.
Tony
Keep my fill in host name out your mouth. Dave Damage.
Jonathan Zaslow
That's right. Don't do that, Dave. That's going to get you trouble. Is the President going to be here tomorrow night? Do I have to worry about that traffic wise, Tony, to be honest, like
Mike Ryan
he's been at a bunch of UFC fights. Security is the same.
Tony
Yeah, I think he saw the card. He's like, no, I'm not going to, I'm not going to this one.
Jonathan Zaslow
But you think he's going to be there, right, Tony? He usually shows up like nothing else going on.
Mike Ryan
Nothing else going on. But it's usually like right during the start of the the main card, where they switch over, they start playing the music, they start doing the highlights, and he'll walk in, like, later on.
Tony
Guys, I know we're making a joke, but there is absolutely something going on. It's moving day at the Masters and he's going to be dialed.
Mike Ryan
But the thing is, the Master is going to be done by then.
Tony
No, at 9 o' clock for the prelims.
Mike Ryan
At 9 o'.
Tony
Clock.
Jonathan Zaslow
He doesn't show prelims. Guys, little double header.
Mike Ryan
He shows up, like, after the first fight.
Tony
If he were going, they would have said it by now because they could have used the bump if the President
Jonathan Zaslow
wanted to show up at the Masters. Can you do that?
Tony
Yeah, I would assume, like, he's the
Jonathan Zaslow
President, so he could do.
Mike Ryan
Desantis was there yesterday.
Tony
Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
Oh, really?
Tony
Yeah. Wasn't announced. Chris is such a huge fan. He spotted him in the gallery.
Mike Ryan
Are you sure it's the Santos or somebody?
Tony
Looks like.
Jonathan Zaslow
I'll look it up.
Mike Ryan
I bet you he was spotted.
Tony
He looked at the booth.
Jonathan Zaslow
Chris has his travel itinerary.
Dave Damaszek
I'm interested in Babe's question there. Could the President actually show up at the Masters? I don't know. Because you really do have to clear out.
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah.
Tony
Are you.
Jonathan Zaslow
Are you a fool?
Tony
Pat McAfee complained about it openly and then was at the Masters 48 hours later. I think the President has more juice.
Dave Damaszek
No, I'm not saying that. I know he could call shots, but wouldn't they really have to fundamentally just clear out entire. I mean, like, you wouldn't. There wouldn't be able to be the people around an entire hole. Right. He did just have to vacate.
Tony
He did 15 laps at the Daytona International Speedway and goes to every football game in the South.
Dave Damaszek
They'll be fine.
Jonathan Zaslow
Be great. If it's the Masters the President wants to go, they have to clear the whole area out. And it's just the President watching each hole, just standing there. He's the only one in the crowd.
Date: April 10, 2026
Location: Elser Hotel, Downtown Miami
Featuring: Dan Le Batard (briefly), Stugotz, Jonathan Zaslow, Mike Ryan, Tony, Dave Dameshek
This Local Hour episode brings a blend of classic Le Batard banter, focusing heavily on the uniquely miserable state of Miami sports, awkward vacation habits, and bare feet (literally and metaphorically) with guest Dave Dameshek. The crew debates vacation etiquette, Miami Heat’s failed “flexibility” strategy, the state of South Florida sports, and previews a lackluster local UFC card, all while showcasing their offbeat chemistry, playful insults, and trademark self-deprecation.
(00:38–07:24)
(07:24–11:58, 21:32–26:47)
(16:09–18:49)
(18:49–20:08)
(21:32–26:47)
(29:08–33:54)
(36:44–38:49)
(Throughout, select highlights below)
The show is in prime Local Hour form—irreverent, self-deprecating, locally passionate yet emotionally exhausted, and always ready to pivot from meaningful sports debate to offbeat, personal, and pop-culture-laden storytelling. The mood swings from sardonic jabs at Miami teams’ mediocrity to ridiculous UFC prison stories and lighthearted digs at each other’s quirks.
This episode is a perfect slice of the show’s DNA: a place where sports futility, local hope, and comedic absurdity all mingle. You’ll leave understanding both why Miami sports fans are frustrated—and how, in classic Le Batard fashion, they manage to laugh about it anyway.