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Dan Le Batard
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Stugats
Life happens.
Dan Le Batard
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Dan Le Batard
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Stugats
Well, I'm very proud of. Of my new shirt. My new T shirt that I'm wearing today. I'm wearing a Brett the Hitman Hart shirt.
Dan Le Batard
New.
Stugats
It's a new one. He's my favorite and I. I thought I was going to show Mike something that he would Appreciate. I said, what do you think of my new shirt?
Chris Cote
Don't like it. Not a Bret Hart guy. Shawn Michaels guy. You can't be a Shawn Michaels guy and a Bret Hart guy.
Stugats
That's right.
Chris Cote
Those people don't exist.
Stugats
Well, that's right. And I'm a Bret Hart guy.
Chris Cote
Yeah, it's Chris.
Stugats
I'm on the right side.
Chris Cote
No, you're not. No. Huge red flag, ladies. If you're out there dating somebody that's a wrestling fan, number one, don't. Number two, if they're a Bret Hart guy, run for the hills.
Dan Le Batard
You were disrespecting Mike Ryan. You did the hand where you waved your hand at him like just. I don't even know. It's the maximum. Pshaw. You're just like, get out of here. I disrespect your opinion.
Chris Cote
You know who's a Bret Hart guy? CM Punk. Yeah, he seems nice.
Stugats
You know what? I'm in on CM Punk these days too. Yeah, and what?
Chris Cote
Yeah, that checks out. That tracks.
Stugats
No, you're right. I did my best. My best Logan Roy to him and I told him that off. Yeah, what is that L to the og.
Dan Le Batard
But what are you. But what are you doing? What are you doing disrespecting Mike Ryan?
Stugats
He disrespected me.
Chris Cote
How many days are you going to start the show stirring shit?
Dan Le Batard
I'm stirring the shit?
Chris Cote
Yes.
Dan Le Batard
He goes.
Chris Cote
Was a private conversation. You think I want to leave my football Tuesday with wrestling?
Dan Le Batard
He goes to you and he says, like I've never seen this kind of vulnerability around here. All you guys are pre ners. He says to you, how do you like my shirt? He's looking for you to. To look at the shirt you're wearing. Button up to the larynx, right?
Chris Cote
Look at my haircut. I don't want to be talking about wrestling. It's bad for my brand.
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Dan Le Batard
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Zaslo
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Dan Le Batard
Football. So football is back, Jack. Oh, my. We waited for so long. We're so damn excited. Put it in a song. No need, no check downs here. Be big hits and quarterbacks. Keep your fantasy team from falling off the track. Football is backjacked whether on the ground or through the air. When the chips are down and you.
Chris Cote
Throw a prayer.
Dan Le Batard
When your team is.
Stugats
Primed in all the hunts.
Chris Cote
It'S 4th.
Dan Le Batard
And 10 you refuse to buck.
Stugats
Throwing.
Dan Le Batard
The shoulder pads and helmets crack that's how you know that football is backjack. Let me hear you say football, football, football, football is backjack. This high is wild and out of control and we're gonna ride it every week till we reach the Super Bowl. No need, no check. Big hits and quarterbacks. If you say this game's the best, I'll say Zach. Football is backjacked. Football is backjacked. Football is back. Football is back. Jack, Tony wasn't here yesterday and he's dying to talk Dolphins and we've moved on, right? The football waits for no one. It's Bears, Vikings now, and we've all moved on. He's like, wait a minute, I want to get on the train. So, Tony, I'm going to let you get back on the train here to talk some dolphins here by giving you a handful of stats of the day from yesterday and that Dolphin game, and you pick what you think is the best, what should have been the stat of the day yesterday from among these four or five dolphin stats. Start of the day, start of the day. It is the start of the day. Start of the day, Start of the day. It is the start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. It is the start of the day. Start of the day. Start of the day. It is the start of the day.
Chris Cote
You got a new band. What is that?
Zaslo
Stat of the Day is presented by Amazon Prime Video. Thursday Night Football is on. The Washington Commanders take on the Green Bay Packers. Coverage begins Thursday at 7pm Eastern only on Prime Video.
Dan Le Batard
Here are your choices from the stats from that Dolphins apocalypse that has everyone in town saying that was the end. Like it doesn't even seem like an overreaction to have the season go down the toilet. And what was a must win game according to Billy and Greg Cody?
Stugats
Only for the fan base.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah, what kind of bullshit was that? We didn't even call him on that yet. Last. Never mind. Here are your stat choices. Tony. The 43 yards in the first half was the fewest for the Dolphins since 1991. The Colts scored on all seven of their possessions. That's the first time that's happened this century that a team had failed to record a stop the entire game this century. And then. And that stat was given as like. And that's as far back as we looked like we if we. It's too many games. I'm not even.
Zaslo
We can't look further.
Dan Le Batard
I know they said like they were doing that stat during the game. They're like maybe we'll look this up more. But just know that this century this hasn't happened. The Colts hadn't scored on their first, first five possessions in a decade that hadn't happened. And they had 13, I'm sorry, they had three 15 play drives and they had five of that all last season. All last season in that game they had 13, I'm sorry, three 15 play drives which is the best of those stats.
Zaslo
There is a lot to unpack there. Okay, let's start with the 43 yards because they, Mike, Mike said it in my ear they were playing a different sport in 1991. 43 yards. When you have that head coach, that quarterback, those wide receivers, that running back, all of those guys are fast, can get on the outside and beat anybody. And then all of a sudden Xavier Howard says, you know what, we just took away his first read and it's kind of over. He doesn't play quarterback after the first read is taken away.
Stugats
A guy who was out of the league last year, by the way, right.
Zaslo
On the Dolphins, who saw two in practice every single day and said, if you got to take away his first read, it's kind of over.
Dan Le Batard
Right.
Zaslo
And we just saw the fruits of that with a Colts team that we looked around and said, was there anything good about the Colts offseason? Did they do anything special? Was there anything that was otherworldly that they did? Not really. They signed Daniel Jones, they got rid of the quarterback who they thought was going to be the future in Anthony Richardson. Now he's gone. They got a bunch of guys on the outside and then Jonathan Taylor. That's really it.
Dan Le Batard
Have you answered my question of which of the stats is the best?
Zaslo
I did. You weren't listening.
Chris Cote
1991.
Zaslo
1991'S 43 yards in the spot.
Chris Cote
Different sport.
Dan Le Batard
I thought that he was saying, there's so much to unpack here. Let's start with the first one, although.
Zaslo
That is the first one. And then I added a little bit.
Chris Cote
Of a little fire hose of a football Tuesday because you got to understand it's a rare Tuesday that feels like a Monday.
Zaslo
Exactly right.
Stugats
He's got a lot to say.
Dan Le Batard
I have a stat I could add.
Zaslo
To it to go on your stats.
Dan Le Batard
Dan, the Dolphins.
Zaslo
Well, more specifically, Tyree Kill has not had a catch over 30 yards in a year.
Stugats
That doesn't even make sense.
Chris Cote
That doesn't. Because that's like his whole game, isn't it?
Dan Le Batard
30, Week 1 against the Jags last season.
Zaslo
His last catch over 30 yards.
Dan Le Batard
Wow.
Chris Cote
He got arrested that day.
Stugats
He did well.
Chris Cote
Detained, not arrested.
Dan Le Batard
He hasn't been the same since then. He has not been the same since case there. Since that very moment. You can chart it statistically since he was arrested. Everything that's happened to the Dolphins makes you forget Barry Jackson pointed this out. It wasn't that long ago that they were 8 and 2 and atop the division over the Bills. And you thought that they were going to beat Josh Allen all the time because Josh Allen had to come down here and throw 50 times until his arm fell off and he still couldn't beat the Dolphins until he beat the Dolphins, like whatever it is, seven straight times.
Stugats
How did the Dolphins have a three game lead on the Buffalo Bills in like Week 13? Less than two seasons.
Dan Le Batard
It wasn't that long ago. And listen to this. Okay, because if. If you didn't think it could get worse because I thought the only ways that that home opener could have gone worse is if Tyree Kill and TO had been injured. That's the only thing in my imagination that would have made it worse. Then I've Never seen that Dolphin game played.
Chris Cote
It would have been worse if it were actually a home opener because I would have loved to have seen that unfold in front of the fan base at Hard Rock Stadium.
Dan Le Batard
Fair enough. But one of the things that you feared, okay, like, I don't know how the day could have gone much worse when in Pittsburgh, Jalen Ramsey is winning the game at the end and Xavian Howard is running around on the field when he's been your best corner for five years, you won nothing, you wasted it, and now you can't cover anybody. And you told him. And good Lord, was his off field stuff troubled? Like there's some soul selling going on here with Tyreek Hill and the rest. Like the Xavier Howard stuff off the field is nuts.
Stugats
He's a disaster, a disaster.
Dan Le Batard
But he was great for them as a corner. And then listen to what he said after the game because certainly you could have imagined that this was so. You saw that it was so. Because Tony saying, first read, you take away the first read. That's how you stop Tua. Nobody could stop Tua when this team was right. Don't tell me you take away the first read and it's that easy. But Xavian Howard seem to know where everything was going and look at what he says after the game. Yeah, we knew, you know, it's a, a lot of a bang, quick throws in the middle. So I told him, man, claw the middle and make sure they throw the ball outside. And we clogged the middle and made, I think we got two interceptions by clogging the middle. And guys come up with interceptions.
Chris Cote
Now there's something to this. And league catches on. Guys, guys come out looking incredible. Carson Wentz was almost an MVP candidate and I know he got hurt, but the league adjusts. This actually happened to the Philadelphia Eagles after they made their first Super Bowl. Shane Steichen goes away. Their whole offense was primary read, lightning quick. Jalen Hurts is as decisive as anyone we've seen with the football. And then the league caught on in one off season and they had to totally reshape their offense after they lost to the Tampa Bay Bucks last season, which was a really incredible job by Kellen Moore. But this stuff happens. And the transcendent talents they rise above, they adjust to the adjustments. And it seems as though Mike McDaniel and Tua are out of answers when it comes to the league's answer to them.
Stugats
That's my biggest issue with McDaniel. It was a conversation last year, week to week basis. Why isn't he making adjustments. I don't know about that stuff. I'm not in the room with them. But I do know he had eight months between the end of last season and the start of this one. To have us not have that same conversation after week one and we're having the same conversation, that to me is a major problem.
Dan Le Batard
The conversation we're having that we weren't having before is so much of it's all over. It's all over, it's all over. No perspective, no anything they can't block again, they're going to get destroyed up front. They've been figured out and that kind of thing. After week one, in my lifetime, whatever city it's happening in has always been an overreaction. It's never not an overreaction after week one. If everyone is howling, get everyone out of here. That is in the history of the sport, always been an overreaction in week one. And it doesn't feel like an overreaction after the way that game was played. It's not losing 30, like you're down 30 nothing. And that's not happening to anyone else in the league. And you're like 30 nothing. Like all the other games are close 30 nothing. You can't stop them at all. And it feels worse than this team has felt. Since when? Tell me since when it's felt this kind of, We've got to start over again.
Chris Cote
The end of Brian Flores, where you didn't know if you had a quarterback, it felt pretty helpless. But one thing that I've kind of read from the fan base is there was all sorts of narratives about this team and the culture stuff. And it feels like the Dolphins fans really tried their best to practice patience, give it time. Tua's gotta be healthy. This is a hugely important year for us to evaluate and nobody wanted to go out there with really toxic takes.
Stugats
I mean, a few days ago, it was the healthiest TUA was gonna be all season, right?
Chris Cote
And everybody was just, alright, we're in this together. Start of the season, fresh start, let's go, let's go get them. We kept the faith and then they give you that effort. As unprepared as any team has ever looked.
Stugats
We're talking about learning lessons after week one. That was the mantra. We're gonna look at the film and learn a lesson, learn lessons.
Chris Cote
We were approaching critical mass and I think after that performance and how listless they look and how undisciplined and how unprepared that they looked, everybody is finally ready to Let out that emotion when.
Dan Le Batard
He says, and you're at a loss for words. We're gonna learn from this. What can be learned from this? Don't be silly. What can be learned from this? I will tell you one thing that should be learned from this that not enough people are talking about to a better not get hit that much all season. Like that better not happen all season where your offensive line can't even protect him when he's got the fastest release in the league from. From being. You need to protect him. And I think it's a stupid thing to learn, but they better have learned it in week one because without him, without, without him, it looks worse than that. Believe it or not, that's the worst game he's played.
Zaslo
You just reminded me of the best thing that happened in that Dolphins game. The one time where I was like, that's good. It was a blind side sack and.
Stugats
He got right back up and he.
Zaslo
Got right back up and he didn't fumble.
Stugats
You're right.
Zaslo
That was just like I looked around everyone else.
Dan Le Batard
That was the best play in the game.
Stugats
He held the ball there.
Dan Le Batard
Best play, and he got up. That was the best play the Dolphins had in the entire game. I was like, yes, put it on the poll. Was the best Dolphins play that Tua got blindsided and did not fumble.
Stugats
I mean, he got annihilated on that play.
Zaslo
It was like you had five seconds.
Stugats
To be like, oh my God. Right? The season was over in that moment, but he got back up. That was an awesome play season.
Zaslo
So we're just a little bit later now. Yeah, a positive.
Stugats
You know, you keep saying it's an over, you know, is an overreaction after week one. And while technically you're right, Dan, it is week one. But that's not where the reaction from Dolphin fan is coming from. It's very clearly a continuation from last year. So it's not a small sample size and it's not an overreaction to one week.
Dan Le Batard
The thing is though, when you guys say, think about where the expectations are on this team, because I do think it's not only funny but accurate to say that the best play in that Dolphin game was the one that Chris is mentioning.
Chris Cote
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Dan Le Batard
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Dan Le Batard
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Chris Cote
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Dan Le Batard
Don Le Batard Football.
Stugats
Football, football.
Chris Cote
Football, football, football, football.
Dan Le Batard
This is the Dan Levatar show with the stugats. Do you know how low the expectations have to be? When I'm satisfied that it's a sack and he's not hurt and everyone gets up and hooray. Because what I was expecting on the other side of the extreme was not merely him being concussed or the ball flowing off toward the sideline. I thought his head and his helmet was going to come off. He was hit so cleanly without any awareness of what was happening behind him. I was expecting his entire head to roll off the field. So I'm like, all right, that's a good play.
Zaslo
Career ending I was expecting. How about when Daniel Jones got hit by Matthew Judon? And I was thinking, if Tua got hit like that, that was bad. The thing is, what's. Where's the calvary coming for this team? Right? Like what, what piece of this team, offensive, defensive? Can you say, okay, this is the part that's going to weather the storm and get them to a place that they can fight for a wild card spot, maybe five for the division. If the Bills, nothing, they've got nothing.
Dan Le Batard
Zero. You can hope that Josh Allen gets hurt. And I still think they're a favorite this weekend against the Patriots. I thought they're. Are they still a 1 1/2 point.
Chris Cote
Favorite against the Pat Banner? That's where you are. That's in the class that the Miami Dolphins occupy a team that was a bad team last year. Oh, if our young quarterback finds his rhythm, they got more hope than you got because they at least have a younger quarterback. They have a fresh regime in there. They have a proof of concept. With a head coach that has gone in the playoffs against Tom Brady in his last game in a Patriots uniform and one on the road, they got way more hope. You got Mike McDaniel. And the whole thing about Mike McDaniel is like like, how's this gonna work? This whole general vibe gonna work when we face real adversity?
Stugats
And I gotta tell you, I'm at the point now, I hate to do this and be this guy, all right? But I can't help it. I'm at the point now with Mike McDaniel where the stuff that I thought was really fun with him and his personality the first couple years, I really don't like anymore. Like when he show, like when you got the pants rolled up to the knees and you got the shiny, you know, neon sneakers and you got the.
Dan Le Batard
Big watch, it's like meandering answers.
Zaslo
Just answer a question.
Stugats
It's like, this is not cute anymore. And again, I hate being that guy, but I don't like it anymore.
Dan Le Batard
Okay, well, when you say you hate being that guy, imagine my conundrum as I hate being the guy I'm about to be right now. And I've been this guy laundering Tyreek Hill for a while as part of like, oh, that's so fast. And it changes everything. And Dolphins have had. Haven't had hope in 25 years. And look, here comes speed. And hooray. Hooray. 70 points. And the most exciting the Dolphins have been in the last 25 years, this entire century in a sport where everyone's close and they make sure that if you're this kind of bad, you get rewarded. So the Lions can go from what they've been to what they are now, where you're like, the Lions lost it. The Packers.
Chris Cote
Yeah. A good 35 year plan that the Lions exit their window closed.
Zaslo
Yeah.
Dan Le Batard
But I have to say this about Tyreek Hill because it came out again yesterday and he was simmering on the sideline. Have a few more games like that and see where it is. The Tyreek Hill experience.
Stugats
Ticking time bomb.
Dan Le Batard
Oh, my God. He's going to embarrass every. Everybody hears so much if there are three more games that look like that. But I need to tell you because I was talking about this. Hard Knocks did some laundering for him, too. And when his story was told on television, it was happy marriage stuff. And what a nice love story at home. TMZ released yesterday that his ex has alleged multiple domestic violence allegations. In a new court filing yesterday, she says there are at least eight instances, including one where he shoved her to the floor, stood over her, and then ripped off her necklace and ripped parts of her hair out, causing cuts and bruises. He also allegedly spat on her. And we kind of knew this was what it was coming in because it Had a bunch of incidents that. If those are public, what about all the other ones we don't know about because someone's afraid of you. And that relationship was volatile and in public in ways that, you know, his house caught fire and that's not even his fault, but just a calamity of stuff spilling into the streets that also includes. This person has always been a danger to women and children. He was that with the Chiefs, he was that before the Chiefs and he's that in Miami. And so if we're gonna talk about him this much, let's take some culpability on all the hope he created around here. This was a deal with the devil, man. They sold their soul for 18 months of speed.
Chris Cote
Yeah, you should have said all that on the front end because it was all true. And now the second that he's not performing, it just feels correct.
Dan Le Batard
It sounds. Look, I'm sorry. I've apologized for this already. I'm just saying, every time I talk about Tyree Kill, I don't know the right amount to bring this up every time without running off the people who are going to tell me I'm woke and always talking about the shit that is off the field. And, you know, you guys say I ruin football all the time for you with whatever it is that I do in my. In my moralizing. This one, this one has been a deal with the devil throughout. We've known it though.
Chris Cote
Yeah, you're getting buy in from the audience right now because he's not good for them anymore. So that's usually how it works.
Stugats
Yeah, that's how sports work, man. Like, I'm guilty of that too.
Dan Le Batard
I was.
Stugats
I'm laughing my ass off after every, you know, 60 yard touchdown reception the first couple years and. And now it's like, yeah, you're an embarrassment to the team that I like. I wish you weren't here anymore. And like, I'm guilty of that. Cause I'm a dopey sports fan.
Chris Cote
But I guess it also plays into kind of loosely to what we were talking about, the Mike McDaniel thing. Like this. All right, this is all working. Tyreek Hill can be a good vibes guy if vibes are good, he's getting the ball and he's produc. But when this team faces adversity, who is the leader? Who is the unquestioned leader of this team that can turn the ship around? And you look to the head coach and all the things that were cool about him and eccentric about him when things were cool and like, oh, this guy's a breath of fresh air. How does that work when you feel like your franchise is at an important crossroads here, and this is the kind of narrative that surrounds him on cable television.
Dan Le Batard
Look.
Chris Cote
Look at what Rex Ryan had to say. This was stuff that was out there. Kevin Clark said on part of my take last month that his co workers at espn, there's like a weird vitriol from guys that used to be in the league towards Mike McDaniel's whole general vibe. And so check out Rex Ryan on Get Up. Just reveling in what was happening with Mike McDaniel.
Zaslo
Audio's not working.
Dan Le Batard
We'll come back to that in a second.
Chris Cote
It was explosive. Dan.
Dan Le Batard
We'll get back to Rex Ryan in a second because this is the space the Dolphins find themselves today, and it's a space no other team in the league is. Not the Saints, not even the Giants in a tabloid city, even though they've got their own problem with Russell Wilson. This team played a game so putrid, so outclassed by a league that was playing professional football while this team was not playing professional football, that the stink of it is such that with all the great football that was played over the last few days, it's still lingering, that the laughing stock in the league is the team that you're laughing at in the entire league is this one. Because everyone's looking at it and saying, oh, that's all doomed. He's gonna be the first coach fired. He's in over his head, and everyone's reveling in what happened. Boy wonder, what happened. You had the offense that put up 70 and you changed your look, and you all of a sudden had Miami.
Stugats
Style and telling Dan Marino to his face, dan, we're coming for all your.
Dan Le Batard
Records, said that to Marino. The league is laughing at the demise of arrogance. This happened the first time I learned it is when Charlie Weiss came to Notre Dame and said, I have a coaching scheming advantage. And all the other coaches were like, you do? Do you? Or you had Tom Brady. You do.
Chris Cote
I mean, look what's happening to Bill Belichick. But here's a quote from Mike McDaniel. Since we don't have the video Mcgenius guy or whatever the hell he is, nerd boy. Their team has no respect for their coach, and they play like that. They're soft. Every part of this football team that.
Dan Le Batard
Would have been good audio to have.
Chris Cote
Explosive. I told you.
Dan Le Batard
Rex Ryan's chattering.
Stugats
Too hot for tv.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah, he's laughing.
Chris Cote
Rex Ryan, look Genius or whatever. Nerd boy.
Dan Le Batard
This is a victory for everyone who's against analytics. Like when Rex Ryan. You know what football's about? It's about snacks, kid. It's about the things in my gut and loving a woman's feet. I know what good football is and it's not what you think it is, nerd boy. It's Mark Sanchez and I'm going to beat you 12 to 10 in the the dirt.
Chris Cote
This league is so silly. It really is.
Stugats
Look, I was. I'm listening to ESPN radio on the way in this morning and each guest that unsportsmanlike had on had to be asked about how pathetic the Dolphins are. Like that's.
Dan Le Batard
Do you realize how crazy it is that that's the story? Yep, there was a lot of good football played this weekend. But the misery of this is so delicious because this, it's not just some boring coach. It's not even like a Dick Jaron or somebody going or an Eber flut flaming out in incompetence. You're watching a comeuppance that the league is enjoying because it seemed like for 18 months when they had Tyreek Hill speed. Oh, Mike McDaniels figured out a way to win without offensive linemen. All their running backs are going to be good and score 18 touchdowns. They don't even need to block anybody. McDaniels going to out scheme everybody.
Chris Cote
There are a couple of teams that come around where the entire nation just enjoys reveling in their misfortune. It's perpetually the Dallas Cowboys, but there was that Philadelphia Eagles team that won the offseason with Namdia.
Stugats
Oh, that's right. Chris Young was the backup.
Chris Cote
Yeah. And the Browns with Baker and Ozone. Super team. And Jarvis Landry where it doesn't line up with all the other bad teams. No one's having fun at Carolina's expense. The expectation is Carolina's going to be bad and they look bad. Whatever. That doesn't move the needle. But these guys who thought they were good, the nerve. This coach who thought he was smarter than everybody else. This whole blueprint that was hanging on by a tether because it's built around a quarterback who can't stay healthy, who's.
Stugats
Always been super polarizing.
Chris Cote
Super. They're enjoying this one and I don't blame them.
Dan Le Batard
It's. It's interesting too to know that everyone laughing at the Dolphins right now is laughing at the only three people on the Dolphins they care about. There's three of them and they're polarizing the three of them are polarizing. And the fourth dolphin nationally you'll have. I mean, maybe somebody will name Waddle, but this is their holy trinity of what it is that's going up in flames. And all three of them. Tyreek Hill was not allowed to talk in Kansas City in front of microphones. They gave him a team over here because he was fast. Mike McDaniel rode that to I'm a little bit smarter than Rex Ryan's chattering teeth on television. Oh my God, is Rex Ryan going to enjoy my demise? And then the most polarizing of all of them. Think about what I'm saying here. The most polarizing of all of them was the guy at quarterback that we couldn't figure out. Is he good because he's good or is he not good? Is he good because he's got boy wonder mcgenius Nerd boy.
Chris Cote
Do you know how long Chris Greer has been around?
Stugats
25 years.
Chris Cote
That's close to aggregate.
Stugats
Now ask how many playoff wins since he's been with the organization.
Chris Cote
0. 0. Chris Greer has been around for nine years and eight months. It's the longest tenured NFL GM ever without a playoff win ever. You don't get to keep that job for a decade without a playoff win.
Stugats
Longest tenure GM in history.
Dan Le Batard
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Stugats
As a scientist, I can tell you that Sundays are only 24 hours long. But with NFL Sunday Ticket and YouTube.
Dan Le Batard
TV, you get every game, every Sunday all in one place.
Stugats
That's upwards of 30 hours of NFL in one day.
Dan Le Batard
How can there be 30 hours in.
Stugats
24 hours, you ask? I have a theory. Magic New users get NFL Sunday Ticket for eight payments of 34.50 per month. Sign up at NFLSundayTicket.com local and national games on YouTube TV. NFL Sunday Ticket for out of market games excludes digital only games and commercial use terms and embargoes apply. Availability varies.
Chris Cote
Don LeBatard to US residents oh wow.
Dan Le Batard
It's in there.
Chris Cote
It's better. You think I haven't been practicing Stugats.
Dan Le Batard
I didn't realize we had a substitute. Complicated legacy brought to you by headquarters road. Huh?
Zaslo
441 power line road. Second down to nine.
Dan Le Batard
This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats. Zaslo has burned it all down and I what I don't understand is I don't see anyone but Cody out here saying Greg Cody, not his son. His son is out on the Dolphins. We are announcing to the nation in a way that has to feel like overreaction. Please tell me that after week one it's an overreaction to say everyone saw on Sunday that the Dolphins season and the architecture of it is over.
Chris Cote
I mean, look, they should should beat the New England Patriots and that'll be the best penicillin. But this is absolutely a Waterloo game for Mike.
Dan Le Batard
Another must win. Another must win.
Chris Cote
Forget must win.
Stugats
No, but just for fan base, this.
Chris Cote
Is Waterloo right now. Like they're going to be boots to asses if they lose this game to the New England Patriots.
Stugats
True or false. There are big time boobirds in the first half this game.
Chris Cote
Oh, they better get a couple thousand percent true. They better.
Dan Le Batard
You guys are begging here. You can't go the boob. You can't go from must win to Waterloo to the boobirds in week two. You guys are begging here.
Chris Cote
But it's not Zaz's great point. This isn't about a one week sample.
Stugats
It's not a one week.
Chris Cote
No. It's about like fans going to the end, to the absolute ends of their patience with a blueprint that was flawed and on top of that has an unlikeable character damn near at the center of it and they're over the shit.
Dan Le Batard
I can talk about dolphins for four hours. I will not. Because there are a couple of other things locally that I wanted to get to. Including finally after an extraordinary week for spitting. I don't think spitting has ever had a bigger week.
Zaslo
It was a hawk to a thing that was huge.
Dan Le Batard
Well, but that's one person instead of that. A great point. Instantaneously wonder where he got it from. Thinking about it all the time.
Zaslo
A spit off here, Dan.
Dan Le Batard
For we've got four spitting incidents. The first of them was buried by, um, Notre Dame. So locally it didn't seem like a lot of people were paying attention to Luis Suarez. Again. I will tell you, Roberto Alomar is the best second baseman I have ever seen. A Hall of Famer. I only think of him when I hear his name as he spit on an umpire. I was that. Was it Steve Palermo? Was it Steve Palermo? I'm just. I remember the. I think I remember the umpire's name. Just because this was such a galling thing to see televised. Somewhat. A man so disrespectful that he was spit in another man's face. And it's happened four times in 10 days. Luis Suarez did it to someone who works in Seattle during a leagues cup final. Then after that you have Dak Prescott spitting at the feet of Carter, Jalen Carter and Carter then spitting on his chest. Then you got the Gator game. And I don't know who the player was that cost them the game against South Florida for a spitting incident. Where are we with this? With Inter Miami. Because you're out on them as a team. But they finally got around to a penalty.
Stugats
Amazing. No, but it wasn't them that got around to a penalty. MLS got around to a Inter Miami hasn't penalized anybody.
Chris Cote
League's cup initially penalized. And it was a heavy punishment for Luis Suarez. No, it was not. You could. You could say with a fair amount of conviction that Luis Suarez will never play in the league's cup again.
Stugats
Right.
Chris Cote
And that's going to sting. Sergio Busquets also got leagues cup. We don't know if Sergio Busquets is going to play ever again in the league's cup either because who knows how much longer in his career he has. So.
Dan Le Batard
So you're banned. You might retire. You're banned. You might sign with another team in another league.
Stugats
Now I understand Sergio Busquets, by the way, threw punches in scrum. And MLS is not disciplining.
Chris Cote
That's right. MLS came down and tacked on what league's cup did because leagues cup is a joint venture between Apple Liga, Mac Ease and mls.
Stugats
But Inter Miami has done anything. They're so gutless in Miami.
Chris Cote
Louis Suarez put out a statement and apology like four days after the fact which was just total bs but here's the suspensions from mls. Luis Suarez got three games. Three games and Busquets zero additional punishment through punches. Yeah and like this is like really in the weeds for MLS fans. But it was great to see Steven Lenhart mixing it up on the Seattle sideline. He's got his credential revoked. Stephen Lenhardt, he's one of the craziest MLS players of all time. But that's just a nice little nugget for MLS fans. But yeah. So only three games in the now all the casuals fans are like you have to win MLS casual. So this does affect their chances in that Louis Suarez still scores goals for them and he's going to miss three MLS games.
Stugats
I can't root for Inter Miami right now.
Chris Cote
I'm not into it because it's football season. Everybody's over.
Stugats
It plays a small role.
Dan Le Batard
Zaslo, I feel like you're a bit of a fraud here.
Stugats
Why?
Dan Le Batard
Because I believe you're just going with the flow and taking easy positions and coming very comfortably to places to. You don't actually care about this team very much and now you're out on them because they're behaving poorly.
Stugats
Mr. Miami, I'm an inaugural season ticket holder. How dare you. I spent my hard earned money. How dare you. How dare you saying I'm a fraud. Do you have seen tickets?
Chris Cote
Remind me, were you a Founders Club member that is a supporter season ticket.
Stugats
Holder your got too pricey.
Dan Le Batard
You're saying that I'm incorrect a little much now when I accuse you of conveniently being out and not just because football season started. Because. Because you don't actually care that much anymore. Not because you don't like the team.
Stugats
Right.
Dan Le Batard
You just. You stopped caring about it before them and then you'd. You don't like the team.
Stugats
Yeah, it kind of coincided the, you know, the massive hike in ticket price to me not caring as much. That played a part. Played a part. But what do you mean I'm taking the easy stance? Are people taking the stance that they're good with spitting? Should that be in the stance that I took?
Dan Le Batard
No. You're taking the morally outraged stance of I'm out on this team. They're unlikable. I don't like how they represent Me at the convenient time. The same way I just did it to Tyreek Hill.
Stugats
Well, to be fair, though, a couple weeks before that, right here. Sit in this chair. I told you that I'm thinking of being out on Inter Miami. Remember? Because they're shady as hell.
Dan Le Batard
No, but it happened over the course of the show. You were thinking about it, and then 14 minutes later you were out. Because we were talking about it. You don't care that much.
Stugats
It's not like the decision had a good think.
Dan Le Batard
Mike made a moral decision to be out on the Browns because Deshaun Watson was offensive to him. You. You should be offended as an Inter Miami person. How inaugural season, how they gouged prices as soon as. As soon as everything got good over there and priced everyone out in Miami.
Chris Cote
That has a lot to do with how vocal the fan base is. You have two really angry fan bases right now at their teams. Dolphin fans and Inter Miami. And Inter Miami fans feel ostracized for the same reasons that Zaslo indicated over there, which is they've been priced out. This is not about the people that it is a halt to get up to that stadium. It's like 10 minutes from Boca.
Dan Le Batard
No. And traffic because we're overcrowded. It's two hours to get there from Miami. If you want to get there from Miami at the time of the game, it's going to take you two hours.
Chris Cote
It is an absolute commitment to support this team, and they're doing very little outside of getting that now. This is not a small thing. They got the greatest player ever. That's. That's, you know, that's pretty awesome for everyone. They talk about checking the good. His career. There's going to be that weird stretch where he was wearing pink. And that's. That's really cool for us.
Stugats
Would it kill him to talk every once in a while?
Chris Cote
I mean, or once. I think he hates it. I think he hates it.
Dan Le Batard
He does hate it. He does. I mean, how bored is he of interviews? The.
Chris Cote
The Messi thing kind of hangs over the discipline and certainly Inter Miami's reaction to it, because Luis Suarez is Messi's boy. But let's put the attention on Luis Suarez, who's damn near 40, and he's had two biting incidents, one on a really grand stage. Four or 40. He's. He's. He's teething like he's four. He's 40. This guy's like, almost 40 years old.
Dan Le Batard
It's a crazy thing to say about a human being of any kind. Never Mind a famous athlete. He's got a multiple bindings.
Zaslo
Like, I'm talking to a kindergarten teacher.
Chris Cote
Like, at least Muskets said he's. At least. At least Musquets is. He's throwing hands.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah.
Chris Cote
What are we doing? Like, this is what we're doing. This is how we're solving the conflicts. We're fighting. And we're spitting.
Zaslo
Have we tried timeout?
Dan Le Batard
I'm convinced that this. This is a theory I've had for years. When Zinedine Zidane headbutted somebody and got into it, I'm like, yeah, of course. These guys even fight knowing that they can't use their hands. Like, I'm going to. I'm going to. I'm not going to use my hands. I can never use my hands. I'm going to bite you, and I'm gonna headbutt you.
Chris Cote
Yeah, but the damn thing was pretty damn cool. I mean, well, biting's not cool. No, biting is not cool at all.
Dan Le Batard
No one thinks biting is cool.
Chris Cote
Biting is not.
Dan Le Batard
Put it on.
Chris Cote
The spinning is not cool.
Dan Le Batard
That Levitard show. Does anyone think biting is cool?
Chris Cote
Headbutting is fine.
Dan Le Batard
Headbutting school, rather cool.
Chris Cote
Like, do you understand what it is? Do you understand the balls it takes to use your own head as a weapon? Like, I don't care about this collateral damage. I'm gonna.
Dan Le Batard
I told you. I told you. One of the most impressive things I have ever seen in my life is a very patient, patient friend of mine who is good at mixed martial arts was driving behind somebody who was doing wheelies on a bike and stuff and purposely slowing him down as he tried to get around him. Very patient. Very patient. Very patient. Finally, the guy throws down his bike and comes at my friend who just gets out of his car and headbutts him and leaves him in the street.
Stugats
That's wild.
Zaslo
No words.
Dan Le Batard
No words. Nothing. Nothing.
Chris Cote
Just left on site.
Dan Le Batard
Crumpled. Crumpled in the street. And didn't. And didn't want to do it. Like, was just trying it. Wasn't mad about it.
Chris Cote
He's not patient.
Zaslo
I mean, didn't want to do it.
Chris Cote
That is not a patient man.
Stugats
Someone like that always wants to. They're secretly waiting for that.
Zaslo
Oh, this guy's going to do that.
Dan Le Batard
Perfect.
Zaslo
Let me go slow.
Chris Cote
So he comes over here.
Zaslo
So I hit him with one of these.
Chris Cote
He's been percolating, perhaps for decades. Yeah, he's been internalizing for. That wasn't even about that guy. That's probably about his dad.
Zaslo
I think he gestures it every day.
Dan Le Batard
In the mirror before he leaves his house.
Stugats
Like today.
Dan Le Batard
I got it wrong on the umpire was John Hirschbeck. It was not Steve Palermo. And Brendan Bett is the name of the spitting gator. I want to get to the Gators in a second, but are these calls any better? Chris Cody, the telephone number. Come on. Come on, people. 300-5486. Got 300-548-64689. The creative community around this show has always been the best one there is in sports media. You guys have stunk at the phone calls. Do better. Boost Mobile deserves better. Support the people who support us.
Zaslo
The Boost Mobile boldest take is presented by Boost Mobile, the newest 5G network in the country.
Chris Cote
Have you ever felt more lost than.
Dan Le Batard
You have walking into a grocery store?
Chris Cote
You don't shop in to do a full shop.
Dan Le Batard
Leardard, stop trying to be a therapist.
Stugats
What up?
Chris Cote
It's inside.
Dan Le Batard
Lou, when you spent the Saturday at the bar.
Chris Cote
Bring home dessert for your wife.
Dan Le Batard
Promise you it'll make everything better. Daniel, the superfaniel from Philadelphia.
Chris Cote
Is it better to be a pioneer.
Dan Le Batard
Or near a pie? The Phillies dad doesn't play catch with his son. Look at the way he wouldn't give up the baseball if you actually played catch with your son. Look at that kid's glove. It looks like my dad. Bad softball, outfield glove. That's just crazy. Yeah, this is Cap Yakima. What if Tommy John name was actually like Eugene Ramirez? How different would he be to get the surgery? Eugene Romero surgery. And also I meant to mention Mike Francis's teeth are not his teeth. That's not a hot take, that's a fact. Jack. Hey, this is Lou. I take it back. We drank too much.
Chris Cote
The bar dessert's not going to help. They answered the bell.
Dan Le Batard
Would you rather be a pioneer or nearby.
Date: September 9, 2025
Location: Elser Hotel, Downtown Miami
Hosts: Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, Chris Cote, Zaslo (guest)
This Local Hour episode is a post-mortem of an apocalyptic loss by the Miami Dolphins, exploring the collapse of optimism around the team, the local fanbase's desperation, and the broader NFL narrative ridiculing Miami. The hosts blend their trademark humor, vulnerability, and unchecked fandom, touching on sports culture, fan identity, team leadership issues, and even broader social discussions on accountability (notably in reference to Tyreek Hill and Inter Miami's controversies).
Timestamps: 21:59–25:45
Fans now turn on Coach McDaniel’s quirky style: "It's not cute anymore." – Stugotz (22:28)
Dan admits discomfort moralizing, but asserts: “This was a deal with the devil, man. They sold their soul for 18 months of speed.” (about Tyreek Hill and the team’s willingness to overlook his troubling past while he’s producing) (24:49)
Chris Cote: “When this team faces adversity, who is the leader? ...all the things that were cool about [McDaniel]...how does that work when you feel like your franchise is at a crossroads…” (25:45)
Timestamps: 23:13–25:22
Dan confronts the audience and himself for “laundering” Tyreek Hill’s image and ignoring patterns of alleged domestic violence as long as he delivered on the field.
Quoting new allegations: “This person has always been a danger to women and children. He was that with the Chiefs, before the Chiefs, and he's that in Miami.” (24:26)
“If we're gonna talk about him this much, let's take some culpability on all the hope he created around here.” (24:49)
Timestamps: 26:23–31:55
The Dolphins, especially Coach Mike McDaniel (“Nerd Boy”), become the laughingstock of the league.
Rex Ryan’s mocking: “Their team has no respect for their coach, and they play like that. They're soft. Every part of this football team...” (28:39, paraphrased)
Chris Cote: “There are a couple of teams...the entire nation just enjoys reveling in their misfortune...But these guys who thought they were good, the nerve. This coach who thought he was smarter than everybody else." (30:06)
Dan: Only three Dolphins are nationally relevant: Tua, Tyreek, McDaniel— “their holy trinity of what it is that's going up in flames.” (30:53)
Timestamps: 34:07–35:54
Is it overreaction or the end? Dan: “Please tell me that after week one it’s an overreaction to say everyone saw on Sunday that the Dolphins season and the architecture of it is over.” (34:36)
Chris Cote: “This is Waterloo right now. Like they're going to be boots to asses if they lose this game to the New England Patriots.” (35:08)
Dan mocks the progression: “You can’t go from must win to Waterloo to the boobirds in week two.” (35:25)
On Dolphins’ collapse:
On Tyreek Hill:
On McDaniel:
On NFL media schadenfreude:
On Inter Miami and spitting:
Comic relief on biting/fighting:
If you're a Miami sports fan, this episode is a cathartic, comedic, yet brutal group therapy session. If you're not, it's an insightful examination of how a single city's optimism—around both its football and soccer teams—can become the national punchline in a matter of days, and what that's like for those who care the most. The show is unafraid to mix sports talk, moral reckoning, and pure goofiness, walking the line between absurdist comedy and serious commentary on the state of sports culture.