Local Hour: The Loneliness of Not Sleeping

Summary

The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz Episode: Local Hour: The Loneliness of Not Sleeping Release Date: April 7, 2025

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Introduction

In this episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz, recorded from the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, hosts Dan Le Batard and Stugotz delve into a myriad of topics ranging from personal anecdotes about sleeplessness and communication challenges to in-depth discussions on sports legends and reality TV experiences. The lively banter among the hosts, along with contributions from Jeremy, Billy Corben, and Jessica, makes for an engaging and multifaceted conversation.

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The Loneliness of Not Sleeping

Dan Le Batard opens the episode by sharing his recent struggles with insomnia. He reflects on the solitude that comes with sleepless nights, pondering who to reach out to for a late-night conversation.

• Dan Le Batard [01:13]: "I'm lucky I don't sleep. And last night was the perfect night for me because there was so much going on over the weekend trying to figure out all the different things I wanted to discuss."

As Dan attempts to contact friends like Roy, Billy, Jess, and Jeremy, he humorously admits to ultimately swallowing his phone instead of sending texts.

• Dan Le Batard [01:50]: "I just swallowed my phone. It's like a ref swallowing his whistle."

Communication Preferences Among Hosts

The conversation shifts to the hosts discussing their preferred modes of communication. Jessica and Jeremy reveal their disdain for unsolicited late-night texts, emphasizing a preference for direct phone calls.

• Jessica [04:10]: "No."
• Jeremy [04:21]: "If Jeremy called me out of the blue, I would just hit ignore."

Dan shares his ongoing battle to reduce late-night texting habits, encouraged by his friends to improve his communication etiquette.

• Dan Le Batard [03:08]: "He learned how to schedule emails."

This segment highlights the diverse communication styles among the hosts and their humorous attempts to navigate each other's boundaries.

Sports Discussion: Alex Ovechkin and Wayne Gretzky

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to a passionate discussion about hockey legends Wayne Gretzky and Alex Ovechkin. Dan expresses his admiration for Gretzky's seemingly unbreakable records and marvels at Ovechkin's pursuit to surpass them.

• Dan Le Batard [06:15]: "There are records that we view as those that are untouchable. And the goal number by Gretzky, to me, was one of them."

The hosts speculate on whether Sidney Crosby could be the next active player to challenge Ovechkin's records, debating the feasibility given Crosby's age and performance trajectory.

• Dan Le Batard [07:39]: "So now let's say that Sidney Crosby is better than Ovechkin in scoring... Does he have five more years? Five more years of scoring 50 goals?"
• Jessica [08:00]: "No, not 50 goals."

They also discuss the strategic implications for the Washington Capitals as they vie for the Stanley Cup, considering how Ovechkin's pursuit of records intertwines with team objectives.

• Dan Le Batard [08:08]: "They're playing for home ice in the Stanley Cup."

Experience with Survivor

Dan recounts his time as a participant in the reality TV show Survivor, sharing humorous and insightful stories about the challenges of the competition and the friendships formed under extreme conditions.

• Dan Le Batard [20:03]: "I was kicked out of Survivor because I was communicating with one of the fellow castaways... we ended up becoming friends."

He highlights the intense environment of Survivor and the lengths contestants go to communicate and strategize, even referencing specific interactions with fellow contestant Sarah Lacina.

Gambling and Dog Racing Banter

The hosts engage in a lighthearted yet critical discussion about dog racing and gambling practices. Dan imagines a scenario where real rabbits are used to motivate racing dogs, blending humor with a touch of dark satire.

• Dan Le Batard [10:56]: "This would be the ultimate thing in dog racing."

Billy Corben adds a personal anecdote about a childhood carnival game involving a rabbit, further illustrating the hosts' whimsical takes on animal racing traditions.

Parenting and Sleep Routines

Shifting gears, Dan delves into parenting strategies, specifically focusing on establishing consistent sleep routines for children. He emphasizes the importance of structure and discipline in ensuring children develop healthy sleep habits.

• Dan Le Batard [34:14]: "The biggest parenting mistake is when people let their kids control their nighttime routine."

Stugotz and Jeremy contribute by sharing their own experiences and challenges with parenting, leading to a relatable and heartfelt discussion about raising children.

Wayne Gretzky’s Legacy and Current Performances

The conversation returns to sports as the hosts discuss Wayne Gretzky's presence at Alex Ovechkin's games, analyzing Gretzky’s iconic status and his enduring influence on the sport.

• Stugotz [27:03]: "Spencer Knight all of a sudden decided he wanted to play goalie when Ovechkin was going for number three on him."

They debate Gretzky's assist records, which Dan argues are "untouchable," and ponder the long-term implications for upcoming players striving to emulate or surpass his achievements.

• Jessica [29:17]: "He still has the assistant points record, which is unbreakable."

Closing Remarks and Lighthearted Banter

As the episode wraps up, the hosts engage in playful exchanges about communication mishaps and share nostalgic stories from their childhoods, such as carnival games and memorable pets.

• Dan Le Batard [39:08]: "What was your fish's name?"
• Jeremy [39:10]: "Cleopatra."

The episode concludes with a humorous take on consistent communication strategies and a final nod to the enduring legacy of sports icons like Gretzky.

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Notable Quotes

• Dan Le Batard [01:50]: "I just swallowed my phone. It's like a ref swallowing his whistle."
• Jeremy [04:21]: "If Jeremy called me out of the blue, I would just hit ignore."
• Dan Le Batard [06:15]: "There are records that we view as those that are untouchable."
• Dan Le Batard [10:56]: "This would be the ultimate thing in dog racing."
• Dan Le Batard [34:14]: "The biggest parenting mistake is when people let their kids control their nighttime routine."
• Jessica [29:17]: "He still has the assistant points record, which is unbreakable."

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Conclusion

This episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz masterfully intertwines personal anecdotes with in-depth sports analysis, all underscored by the hosts' trademark humor and camaraderie. From the introspective moments of sleeplessness to the spirited debates about hockey legends and reality TV experiences, the show offers listeners a comprehensive and entertaining journey through the diverse interests of its hosts.

Transcript

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[Mike Ryan]

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[Dan Le Batard]

Cuervo? Anytime someone says Cuervo, I show up.

[Mike Ryan]

Well, I do know that to be true. But even during ad reads like Cuervo, I think you could lay out, especially for one of our great partners, sweet, delicious Cuervo. Since then, Cuervo has stayed true to its roots. The same family, the same land, the same passion.

[Billy Corben]

Cuervo.

[Mike Ryan]

So enjoy the tequila that started it all. Cuervo. Cuervo, the tequila that invented tequila. Proximo. Cuervo.com Please drink responsibly.

[Billy Corben]

Cuervo.

[Stugotz]

This is the Don Levatar show with the Stugats podcast.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm lucky I don't sleep. And last night was the perfect night for me because there was so much going on over the weekend trying to figure out all the different things I wanted to discuss. The problem with the loneliness of not sleeping is who am I gonna call? I went down the list. Can I reach Roy? Is there any way to get to Billy or Jess or Jeremy, who's gonna answer my texts? And I must tell you guys that I went over. I didn't contact any of you.

[Jessica]

I was about to say, I didn't get a single text from you, buddy.

[Stugotz]

What time are we talking here?

[Dan Le Batard]

This was approximately. So my night was I got to Miami, check into the hotel, and then White Lotus. So I watched that till about 1046 because I didn't start it directly at 9. It was an hour and a half. Then this was about 1:47, approximately when I wanted to reach out. And the reason I remember is I was thinking maybe I could reach out to Dan, who's in a different time zone. But then I just swallowed my phone. It's like a ref swallowing his whistle.

[Jeremy]

Did you have anything interesting to say, or was this just loneliness like, hey, you up?

[Dan Le Batard]

It? Well, it always starts with, hey, are you up? But I think it gets Interesting. Talking about what order to talk about stuff. Like I wanted to start with work. Yes.

[Jeremy]

At one in the morning on a Monday morning.

[Dan Le Batard]

It seemed important because we were going on air and only 7 hours and 13 minutes. And so I was calculating in that remaining time can I get through everything that I have to get through. And again, I swallow my phone.

[Jeremy]

You made a good decision. Dan would have texted us for sure.

[Dan Le Batard]

So Dan does do that. He's been told not to. He's really trying to improve on that, but I actually. Is he? No. Yeah, you know, he's trying. He's totally trying. No, no, he. Are you still getting the 5am emails? Yes, because he learned how to schedule emails.

[Jeremy]

Wait, what time did you get the email the other day?

[Billy Corben]

That was 3:47 Eastern. Eastern.

[Dan Le Batard]

He promised me that he would schedule emails.

[Billy Corben]

I. How long ago was that conversation?

[Dan Le Batard]

It's been three or four days maybe.

[Billy Corben]

Three or four days? Yeah. All right, so then we're good. It was before that.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, there's a whole new sheriff in town. It's all about the scheduling. He had a funny thing that he did when he scheduled something. He doesn't like to interrupt. Nothing personal. Which is done at 8am live this morning. Of course, he texted the entire nothing personal show and I didn't respond. But he's also potentially in a different time zone and so he said, I'm going to send an email, but you won't get it. And scheduled 8:00. Don't look. It came at 11:00 Eastern. He scheduled it for 8:00, his time zone.

[Jeremy]

If you're going to tell me you're sending me an email at that point, just send it. There's no point in the warning that you're going to get an email.

[Billy Corben]

I was wrong. It wasn't 3:47, it was 345.

[Dan Le Batard]

Do you not like the text that says are you free?

[Jessica]

No.

[Dan Le Batard]

You just want the phone call, you want the vote right off the top, just call me.

[Jessica]

Yes, absolutely.

[Dan Le Batard]

See, I was taught by people younger than I that they like the warning first. Like, hey, can we talk? Or hey, are you friends?

[Jeremy]

It's one of my, my good gal friends. Just call me.

[Dan Le Batard]

So for me, I'd have to do the warning text.

[Jeremy]

If you called me out of the blue, I'd be like, huh? Ooh, that's how you be like this about. If Billy called me out of blue, I would be like, oh, yeah, yeah, something written wrong.

[Stugotz]

I'm not a caller. I don't really like call people. I'M more of a texter.

[Jeremy]

If Jeremy called me out of the blue, I would just hit ignore.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, I get that.

[Dan Le Batard]

So everyone you work with is either a ha. Oh. Or an ignore.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

No, if Taylor called me, I'd be like, what's up? Hey, buddy. What about what? A Nick came from OG last night. Oh, man, he's been playing so well the last couple of weeks.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's such a great list we could make of who we work with, who gets what when a call comes in or an email, anything from the ignore to what's even worse, which is the oh. Or for me, what. The worst is what you did with me, actually, Jessica, which was the like, that made me feel terribly lonely and upset.

[Stugotz]

The oh is a confusing description. Like, I feel like. And I don't know, I feel like Jess doesn't hate me, but the oh is like, oh, if he's reaching out to me, things must be there.

[Jeremy]

I think there must be, like, a work emergency if you're calling me.

[Dan Le Batard]

I've actually called you before with stuff that was going on. I called you the story first, but I did the text.

[Jeremy]

Yeah. So I'm saying if you just call out of the blue, it's like, yeah, that's not good.

[Dan Le Batard]

I wish it didn't have to be that way. Especially last night. Especially knowing all the different topics. I don't know how to lead with anything other than the nonsense we started with with Ovechkin. It's history. There's. We could talk about, obviously, what happened to Duke over the weekend, and we will. We should. We can talk about. Because I think we have to. Let me check my contract. I have to do LeBron and the Cowboys and the Heat and the Marlins and the Dolphins.

[Jessica]

Fine print.

[Dan Le Batard]

Very fine print.

[Stugotz]

Well, Panthers, too. Don't forget that.

[Dan Le Batard]

And we have to do Panthers and.

[Stugotz]

Tomorrow we have to relitigate all of those topics.

[Dan Le Batard]

No, no. Well, you may, but I wouldn't do that.

[Jessica]

No.

[Billy Corben]

We have to talk about, um, basketball.

[Jeremy]

We could also do that, but 2023's team.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, that's right.

[Dan Le Batard]

I like doing Ovechkin. And the reason I want to talk about Alex Ovechkin is that I am a sucker for watching things that never happen, that I expect never to happen. It's why I rooted for the Chiefs to win the Super Bowl. I wanted to see the three peat because I've never seen a three peat when I was lucky enough. And this is a total hit the button, which someone else will do. I went to Gretzky's last game ever. And it was really cool. It's not me. I was in New York. I didn't fly for it. It was there. But the thought was in New York, and certainly in Edmonton, that Wayne Gretzky, the great one, the goat, that record will never be broken. I think that there are. There are records that we view as those that are untouchable. And the goal number by Gretzky, to me, was one of them. And then Ovechkin, out of nowhere, he's getting closer and closer. Just for fun. Do you guys know who's next to break Ovechkin's record? Active? What's your number? One guess, Probably Sidney Crosby. Sidney Crosby. And then you'd say, how far away is Sidney Crosby?

[Jessica]

Maybe give me an over.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'll give you an over.

[Jessica]

5200.

[Dan Le Batard]

273. So now let's say that Sidney Crosby is better than Ovechkin in scoring. He's. Let's say he's McDavid. Let's say he scores 60. 60 goals a season. Get me an age on Sidney Crosby. 37.

[Jessica]

Yeah, just about.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, roughly. Does he have five more years? Five more years of scoring 50 goals?

[Jessica]

No, not 50 goals. No.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's out of the question. There's no chance. We watched a record last night, and I kept thinking about the business of the record because Ovechkin did it on the road. They could have sat him against the Islanders and had him come home and break the record. But the Capitals are playing for something. They're playing for home ice in the Stanley Cup. They got.

[Jessica]

They already have it.

[Dan Le Batard]

I thought.

[Jessica]

They have.

[Dan Le Batard]

Aren't they behind Winnipeg?

[Jessica]

Yes, they are behind Winnipeg. For the east, though, they get home. Iceland.

[Dan Le Batard]

Right. But for the Stanley cup, they got to catch Winnipeg.

[Jessica]

Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

So they got a reason to win, and so they're going out there trying to win it. So, of course you play Ovechkin. What we do, when we have a player who has a chance to break a record, we actually give him the choice we would ask. We had spoken to ichiro before his 3,000th hit. Do you want to play in Colorado? Do you want to wait till you're back in Miami? And he said, put me in, coach. I want to win the game. I'm ready to play, asshole. So I. Wow.

[Jessica]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's really. That's not.

[Billy Corben]

Ichiro ruined everything.

[Dan Le Batard]

Of all the words to describe Ichiro, that's not one.

[Stugotz]

I wasn't talking about him.

[Dan Le Batard]

You talking about me?

[Stugotz]

I'm not pointing any fingers. Just Saying someone involved was.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm sorry. Sorry.

[Stugotz]

Did Jaga retire officially? I feel like Jagger still has a run in him.

[Jessica]

Yes, I believe he retired. He's in Europe right now.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think I saw him playing in Europe. At the age. Isn't he 58.

[Jessica]

He is not 50.

[Dan Le Batard]

How old is Jagger? He's.

[Jessica]

He's. He's. He's free up there, but he's not 58.

[Dan Le Batard]

Gordie Howe.

[Jeremy]

Well, 53.

[Dan Le Batard]

No, 53.

[Stugotz]

He's got like two seasons left.

[Jessica]

Gordy Howe's dead, by the way.

[Dan Le Batard]

But Gordie Howe scored goals in the NHL, I believe. At 52 years old. Yes. How is it that someone. I'm 57. I can barely get out of bed and forget getting on skates. But can you imagine the possibility of scoring a goal in the NHL at 52? Jagger's done. He'll never score again. On the ice. In the NHL?

[Jessica]

Yes, in the NHL. He's not doing that.

[Dan Le Batard]

Billy.

[Stugotz]

Yes.

[Dan Le Batard]

It wasn't me.

[Stugotz]

I'm not blaming you.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's time for me to tell you the truth.

[Stugotz]

Madding because I'm ready to hate Don Mattingly.

[Dan Le Batard]

You do not.

[Stugotz]

I hate him.

[Dan Le Batard]

How do you hate now? Now you're just being argumentative.

[Stugotz]

No, I don't like him. Donnie. Baseball, please.

[Dan Le Batard]

Donnie Mattingly is one of the great players. Hall of Fame players. Short of back issues. Longest tenured manager in Marlin's history. We didn't fire Mattingly when we could have.

[Stugotz]

I know. The only manager I wanted you to fire and you guys refused to. She's couldn't do me a solid.

[Dan Le Batard]

I really liked firing managers.

[Stugotz]

Constantly taking out pitchers when they're middle. No hitters.

[Billy Corben]

Guy, what is it that you liked the most about firing managers?

[Dan Le Batard]

That there would be an opportunity for improve. That the dream could be alive.

[Billy Corben]

So it wasn't about like the feeling of knowing you were ending their tenure. Like, it wasn't. It wasn't the benefit of knowing that their job was lost. It was just knowing that there was a future ahead of you.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's a carrot. It's. I always felt in baseball that's more human. Over those 18 years, I always felt like the dog at the track. I always feel badly for those dogs. Of course, you go and you bet on them and it's horribly inhumane. But they're always chasing that thing that goes around the track, I think. Is it a carrot or a bunny? It's a rabbit.

[Jessica]

Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

Literally. It's not a real rabbit. It's.

[Jessica]

No, no.

[Dan Le Batard]

Rabbit.

[Jessica]

Yeah. Mechanical rabbit. Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

How mean is that? They never catch it.

[Jeremy]

You want it to be real rabbit?

[Dan Le Batard]

No, I want them to be able to catch it. Like, for winning, you should. Instead of winning money just for your owner and for the fans who bet on that dog, shouldn't that dog get the rabbit?

[Stugotz]

Yeah, it'd be awesome. The race ends and then they throw like a real, like, rabbit on the track. And now it's like, have at it, dog.

[Dan Le Batard]

You won. Yeah, the two dog got the rabbit. Wouldn't that show the other dogs that they ought to be running faster?

[Jeremy]

Yeah, but then if they find out it's a fake rabbit, they're not gonna run as fast next time.

[Dan Le Batard]

Do they know the difference?

[Stugotz]

Well, no. That's why you throw a real rabbit on after the race. And you let you sacrifice rabbits, elderly rabbits that are on their way out in terms of honestly, like, putting them.

[Billy Corben]

Out of their misery.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, exactly right.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm talking euthanasia.

[Stugotz]

Exactly right. Rabbit euthanasia.

[Dan Le Batard]

This would be the ultimate thing in dog racing.

[Jeremy]

I don't like any of this.

[Jessica]

The Peter people.

[Stugotz]

Do dogs still race? I thought that dog racing kind of went by the wayside.

[Dan Le Batard]

No, that's a. It's a whole thing, really. We did. When I was a summer associate at a law firm, they took us to a dog track and we were told that you always do the trifecta, 2, 1 5, and that it will hit once during the course of a day of races.

[Jessica]

How long ago Was that?

[Dan Le Batard]

In 1991. Wow. Is that before Jessica was born, by chance?

[Jeremy]

Well, before Jeremy and I were born.

[Dan Le Batard]

So I was in law school. And in law school, you go to your summer associate at a firm and they do, like, events in order to woo you to. It's a bait and switch. They let you go to a dog track and a racetrack and baseball games because then they work you 100 hours a week once you get the job. So it's, it's, it's ridiculous. So you go to the dog track and they. You get a coupon, like, for a drink. But it's your own money if you want to gamble. But we were told 21 5. And so you bet the trifecta every single time. And wouldn't you know it, 2, 1, 5 hits almost every time. It's a little bizarre. Almost like it's fixed. Almost like the rabbits fixed.

[Billy Corben]

This is great advice on something that I don't think any of us in this room are going to do or would advocate for at this point, but I appreciate having knowledge. I, I mean, I don't go to Highline. A couple other people go.

[Dan Le Batard]

You bet on highlight.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, go to Highlight.

[Stugotz]

Highlight is like, at least like my experience with Highlight here is it's very similar to, like your experience at the law firm where it's like, oh, come on in and here's some free money to bet. And then you can leave with free money. But on the way out, why don't you check out our casino and. Oh, you want $80. That's free. $80 you can spend in our casino today.

[Dan Le Batard]

Drop it on red.

[Jessica]

I mean, I won $400 at a Daniel Highlight.

[Stugotz]

Really?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

Doing what?

[Jessica]

Trifecta.

[Stugotz]

Oh, wow. Did you report it?

[Dan Le Batard]

Was it 21 5?

[Jessica]

No, it was not 21 5.

[Dan Le Batard]

You don't have an 8 in there somewhere? I'm not giving tax advice to any of you, but do you? If you don't deduct your losses, you really don't need to declare your wins on the slot machines, though. They give you an actual tax form if you hit a big slot win at a casino. But if you. If you put $1,000 on or a million dollars on black and roulette and win, they give you the chips, they give you the money. They don't. You don't fill out anything. But on slots you do.

[Jessica]

I mean, you would think that would be pretty noticeable winning that much money. Probably would have to declare that, wouldn't you?

[Dan Le Batard]

The greatest example of someone doing something noticeable and not declaring was the first ever winner of Survivor. When everybody was watching, a guy named Richard Hatch won Survivor in 2000. He was the one who was naked on national television and he decided to take the million dollars and not declare it as income. And he got caught and convicted of tax evasion.

[Jessica]

Of course he did.

[Dan Le Batard]

And because they didn't withhold it, you're supposed. Listen, if you withhold, which is what you get with a normal paycheck, there's tax withholding. You still have to file your taxes and you still have to declare what your income is. That idiot didn't do it.

[Stugotz]

Well, what was his thinking? That he wanted abroad and they gave him the check abroad. So it wasn't income for the US Government.

[Dan Le Batard]

Survivor had just started. It's the same thinking as the people on the Price is Right who are betting a dollar, who bid a dollar on the showcase and then win. And you know how they always say the retail value of this showcase is 14,000, 469? You get taxed for that. So just FYI, like, remember when Oprah gave a car to everybody Tax with a car. You can't take that car if you can't afford to pay the tax because it's taxed.

[Jeremy]

I imagine we'll talk about the White Lotus season finale later on in the show, but there was a noticeable thing that happened that made me think, what if the IRS finds out about this? But again, we'll wait till later because I know everyone hasn't seen it yet.

[Stugotz]

You know, a lot of people on those, like, home renovation shows, they. They end up losing the houses. Yeah. Because the value goes like way up. They can't pay the property tax on it. And it's like, wow, we fixed up your house and now you're homeless.

[Dan Le Batard]

They're amazing people in Florida for a living. They actually will help your property tax bill go down. They take a percentage of it. Do you guys do this? If your homeowners in Florida, they're. They're tax assessment lawyers. And if your house is worth 600 grand, they'll make it. So your house is worth 300 grand?

[Jessica]

Sure. That's not a scam.

[Dan Le Batard]

No. These are legitimate. These are legitimate lawyers. It's done. The players, we all did it. It's not a scam at all. It's approved by the state of Florida, the Department of Revenue of Florida. Totally legit. But they take a cut.

[Jessica]

Might have to look into that. Every house down here is like worthless, like 800,000 now.

[Dan Le Batard]

So you should 100% take a look. There's a way to fight what your assessment. But when the home renovation comes, it didn't occur to me that that is one of the things that comes with.

[Stugotz]

It, like the Price is Right. Also, a lot of the people end up leaving without the prizes because they have to, they have to like pay or show that they're going to pay on the way out. And they're like, oh, nevermind. Like, I had this great moment, but now I don't get any of these prizes. There's shows that I think I read. I don't remember which shows it was where they give the prizes. And if you can't and you're like in the audience, you can be like, yeah, I'll take that prize. As long as you're going to pay for it. I need to look up which shows offered the prize. The prizes were up for Grant.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's like the boat in the Price is Right. I always laughed at that. When they go out and there's this big boat that someone wins.

[Jeremy]

What a headache. Well, I would never like what. I don't want a boat. I Want to know someone with a boat?

[Stugotz]

Well, no. It's like you win a boat but you live in South Dakota and it's like, oh, my God, I won this boat. It's like, great. What am I going to do with this boat?

[Jessica]

Sell the boat. If, if you can afford the tax and get that.

[Dan Le Batard]

How do you take delivery? I always thought about that, that you have to handle the stuff that you win on. The Price is Right, it's one of my favorite game shows, but you really have to be careful. There's a great documentary about someone who was gaming the prices. Right.

[Jeremy]

I watched that. It was very interesting. He had like a massive database of what everything cost over the history of time.

[Stugotz]

He was wronged. I mean, he was punished for studying and doing research and just having all of the information.

[Dan Le Batard]

I've had a major issue with that. I don't like punishing people who do extra work that should be rewarded. The fact that he's willing. There are people on Survivor as an example, who practice the puzzles in advance. They build 3D models, they're doing all sorts of stuff. And old school Survivor players are upset with them. And I'm the opposite. I think it's the greatest thing ever if you're willing to do that. I tried to sit in the driveway. I tried to make fire before I went on the island. I had flint and a machete.

[Stugotz]

I don't understand how there's people that still go on Survivor and don't know how to make fire.

[Dan Le Batard]

Like, you know, it's harder than you.

[Stugotz]

Think, but you should practice it, you know, and especially if you get to the end, it gets down to like a fire making competition towards the end of Survivor. So there's people who have been on the island for 40 days, 36 days, whatever it is now, and haven't practiced at one point in time, had no plan on getting there, what they would do if they were in that position.

[Dan Le Batard]

You actually do practice before filming starts. You go to the island and there's a whole pre show and part of that is making fire and making shelter. You know those palm fronds that you have to weave them and you do it by hand. It takes a lot of practice and you have hours, days, a week before the show starts and you have to learn how to do it. And I could never. I'm terrible at that kind of stuff.

[Stugotz]

So what would you guys do? You'd go and you'd have like, okay, it's time for Survivor school today. And they'd take you out to Survivor school and Then you'd go back to like the Four Seasons or whatever. And they're like, all right, in six days.

[Billy Corben]

It sounds like the beginning of the training in the Hunger Games. Like, it's. They're setting you up to just send you out to slaughter.

[Dan Le Batard]

So as a matter of fact, you are at a resort, but you're in a tent on the ground so you can start adjusting to living outside.

[Jessica]

And like Fire Fest.

[Dan Le Batard]

And you're in. Well, except you're told in advance what it will be like. And you don't. You don't pay. You get paid. And secondly, it's not Survivor school. There's a whole thing. You have to do medical checks, you do mental health checks, you do cast photos, you do interviews, you meet with the producers. There's all sorts of pre show stuff that you have to do.

[Stugotz]

Are you isolated from the other contestants?

[Dan Le Batard]

No. But you're silent. You're not allowed to talk.

[Stugotz]

Huh.

[Dan Le Batard]

So for me, it was the worst part of the game. They give you books, you can read, etc. I read a. I read Animal Farm while waiting, but I hadn't read that since high school. And it was really interesting.

[Billy Corben]

Very interesting choice to read Right. Before doing Survivor.

[Dan Le Batard]

Why do you think it was one of the choices? Listen, they're not only.

[Billy Corben]

Imagine the headspace that put you in.

[Dan Le Batard]

And you eat three meals with everybody, but it's all in silence and there's guards.

[Billy Corben]

How long is this process? Like, was this a couple of weeks?

[Dan Le Batard]

No. No. About a week.

[Mike Ryan]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

I got in trouble. I almost got kicked out of Survivor before. I got kicked out of Survivor because I was communicating with one of the fellow castaways. Her name was Sarah Lacina. I didn't know her name at the time. We had never met. We had only seen each other in silence and our tents were next to each other. And I was so lonely that week with no ability to talk to anyone but the shrink and the producers, that I tried to communicate quietly in the tent, but they have guards out there watching. And I kept getting in trouble.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, this still sounds like the Hunger Games.

[Dan Le Batard]

And I didn't stop. So then we started communicating through sneezing, where we would sneeze. And then we got to say God bless you. And then we had. We ended up becoming friends. We're still friends to this day. It's all part of my 1:47am text issue last night.

[Jessica]

You texted her?

[Stugotz]

Yeah. What was Sarah up to?

[Dan Le Batard]

She's on the central time zone.

[Stugotz]

Oh. So it's only 1247.

[Dan Le Batard]

So that would have been a candidate. Except she's not doing the show today. It was really for all of us to figure out where we wanted to go after Ovechkin.

[Jessica]

Get on a show.

[Stugotz]

Book her.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah.

[Billy Corben]

Let's talk Survivor.

[Stugotz]

We saw Sarah today.

[Dan Le Batard]

Sarah amazing on the show. She would 100% come on. She's a police officer in Iowa. She's one survivor. I don't know if you know that name. And I was the first Jew she ever met.

[Stugotz]

Oh, and after meeting you of the Jewish people.

[Dan Le Batard]

She's not converting. She's not going to temple anytime soon. But she certainly enjoyed meeting me.

[Stugotz]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think just making sure we're not.

[Stugotz]

Breeding anti Semites, you know, with bad experiences.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, it's the opposite.

[Stugotz]

Pro Semites.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think we're exactly. We're breeding love.

[Stugotz]

Is this Sarah that went on to do, like, the challenge and stuff?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yes.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

You've heard of her?

[Stugotz]

I have.

[Dan Le Batard]

She ran around the world with me.

[Jeremy]

You've clearly seen a lot of her. Her work, you know, but more than Don Mattingly.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, well, wait, do you want.

[Stugotz]

No one's Johnny Tebow. Get out of here, Billy.

[Dan Le Batard]

You want an intro?

[Stugotz]

No, no, no, we're good.

[Jeremy]

It seems like the opposite.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, no, I'm fine.

[Dan Le Batard]

Wait, he does. I think it feels like I want to do a shittach here.

[Stugotz]

A who?

[Dan Le Batard]

A shiddock.

[Jessica]

What is that, Yiddish?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yes.

[Jessica]

You want to translate that to English?

[Dan Le Batard]

It's a meeting I want to do. Some sort of connection.

[Stugotz]

I don't like meeting my heroes. And Sarah I would consider a hero at this point.

[Dan Le Batard]

They just let you down.

[Jessica]

Never meet your heroes.

[Stugotz]

Yeah. You know, I could always aspire and think, oh, what would Sarah do? But if I meet Sarah, then I know what she would do. And maybe I wouldn't agree. Like, I was finding out Sarah was here the whole time behind the scenes, pre Survivor, trying to communicate with you illegally. So, I mean, is that the kind of person I want enforcing the law? I don't know about to take shots at her as a police officer.

[Dan Le Batard]

Officer.

[Stugotz]

Thank you for your service, Sarah. But, you know, just something to think about. If we're willing to bend the rules of Survivor, what other laws are we willing to bend the rules on?

[Dan Le Batard]

You're willing to lie and survive even if you're not a liar. You have to. It's part of the game. You have to pretend you're something you're not. I think we're all familiar with that, aren't we? Not really. It's sort of like imposter syndrome. To the 10th degree, isn't it?

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[Billy Corben]

Jerbear here and I'm here to tell you all about Boost Mobile, which is now a legit nationwide 5G network. So I must take a break from the jokes here for a second and put on my serious voice because I would never, ever joke about a 5G network that has invested billions building 5G towers across the country. Not even once. Not even if Mr. Boost Mobile himself asked me to. There is nothing funny about it. Boost Mobile is now a legit nationwide 5G network and also provides coverage across 99% of America. Seriously? Visit boostmobile.com or your nearest Boost Mobile store location to learn more. The Boost Mobile network, together with our roaming partners, covers 99% of the US population. 5G speeds not available in all areas.

[Mike Ryan]

Folks, it's Mike Ryan and do you know that Miller Lite has basically been a partner of this show for almost 20 years? And as we celebrate 50 years of Miller Lite, that means for a large chunk of it. And look, I didn't go to school for math, but I'm pretty sure that's like 80% of the time that Miller Lite's been existing. They've been with our show and I'm so grateful for it because we truly believe this. If you listen to us back in our radio days, throughout our times in national radio, to the pirate face to now. You know that Miller Lite has been a huge supporter of ours and I've always been a huge supporter of Miller Lite. Why? Because it's got taste. You know, you can depend on a great beer trusted by beer lovers for 50 years. Miller Lite Great Taste. 96 calories go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you, or you can pick up Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

[Dan Le Batard]

Don Lee oh, I like firing people. So I, I, I take the opportunity to fire whenever I possibly can because I can use it as a learning experience for them and try to help them out and try to point out what they did wrong. But case the the employee was enough levels below where I was that I did not do the firing, but I had it done within moments of discovery. I'm just like, firing people.

[Billy Corben]

It's just absurd. It's absurd.

[Dan Le Batard]

Sts I'm talking about people who I fire, who deserve it, who have done something that actively requires me to fire them. It is my unadulterated pleasure to do so.

[Stugotz]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the stugats.

[Dan Le Batard]

I was thinking about Wayne Gretzky being forced to go to all of Ovechkin's games. Did you watch? Please tell me you watched Gretzky present Ovechkin and shake his hand and give the thumbs up. Please tell me that I'm not the only one who saw Wayne Gretzky with his smile.

[Jeremy]

He might be.

[Stugotz]

No, I was very locked in on what day was it? Friday, I think it was when he scored the two goals and he was going for the third. And then he didn't want to go in because he didn't want an empty net. But then he went in and they were just feeding him the puck and I don't know. Spencer Knight all of a sudden. Who down here? Notoriously Spencer Knight. Thank you for your service. But Spencer Knight all of a sudden decided he wanted to play goalie when Ovechkin was going for number three on him for the night and just wouldn't let him do it at home for whatever reason. So he has to then go and do it against the islanders. Poor Wayne Gretzky was there and he was following him. That's like Roger Maris family, except the opposite, right? Because the Maris family, let's be real, you're the mayor's family of one thing. Just that record, right? And they'll try you out. They trotted you out when it was Mark McGuire and it was Sammy SOS and we thought, okay, fine, we're every.

[Billy Corben]

Couple of days we don't have to.

[Stugotz]

See Roger Maris son anymore. Finally, we're done with that guy, right? And then Aaron Judge is going to break the AL home run record and said, oh, what do we do to celebrate this? Let's bring the Marist boys out again. So Maris, his son is there and he's in Toronto, and he's going around the world on this tour again, following the home run chase. Just to have someone spoil his father's legacy. It's really cruel what they do to the Marist family. They like it because it's, you know, relevance for them, but it's really like, let's come here and watch someone ruin your daddy's legacy and everything that he's known for.

[Dan Le Batard]

You think that Gretzky was thrilled to be at the Island?

[Stugotz]

Oh, not at all.

[Billy Corben]

No.

[Dan Le Batard]

Definitely not at all despondent. And you could tell with the smile. Now, he may have been three sheets to the wind. However you want to say it, that's not irresponsible journalism. It is personal experience.

[Stugotz]

He's a lush.

[Dan Le Batard]

He enjoys a cocktail from time to time. He's the great one.

[Jessica]

He's got his own wine label in Canada.

[Dan Le Batard]

Think about what he does. He's. He's in the business of being Wayne Gretzky. It's an entire business every day. You can't escape yourself. You are who you are. And his business is being the great one. And so he's there. Janet Jones, who I. If you know who that is, his wife.

[Jeremy]

Is he just a great one now?

[Dan Le Batard]

He's still the great one to.

[Jessica]

Well, he still has the assistant points record, which is unbreakable.

[Dan Le Batard]

The. The assist record is unbreakable. 1963 assists. Wayne Gretzky has, and I believe second place right now. Active, I think, is also Crosby, and I think it's down at like a thousand.

[Billy Corben]

1060.

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean, it's.

[Billy Corben]

That's crazy.

[Dan Le Batard]

900 assists.

[Jeremy]

Tell me when that record's broken, then I'm. Goals things cool. But.

[Jessica]

Well, Gretzky has more assists than the rest of the league in history has points, so there's that. That's unbreakable.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think you're. I think you're the. If you're that, don't you stay the great one.

[Stugotz]

Do you think that he, like, regrets some of those assists now? Like, after his goal record goes down, he's like, I should have been a little more selfish. Like, I really like.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, he had a spare.

[Stugotz]

Exactly right.

[Billy Corben]

700 of.

[Stugotz]

Come on, Wayne. Put the puck in the back of the net.

[Billy Corben]

For that matter, in terms of assists, he has what he has 1963. The most points otherwise is 1921. So he had, like 42 assists. To spare. That could have been goals. And who knows? What if Ovechkin, you know, tweaks something in the next 40 goals and then all of a sudden he could have been the goals leader as well.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think Ovechkin's retiring. I thought that's true in the record and he's done now. I don't think he's coming back.

[Billy Corben]

So even more, even more to say that Wayne Gretzky really should have been more selfish and turned 40 of those assists into goals. Even, even, honestly, even if, if, if there would have been 40 attempts there and even 20 of them could have been goals. Right? Maybe, yeah. 20 fewer points on his career, but still leading in assists, leading in goals, and he never has to worry about the Sovechkin guy. What a mistake.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm trying to imagine how that would go with Gretzky, who took more pride, I believe, in his assists than his goals and still would have been the.

[Billy Corben]

Leading assist man of all time. I'm just saying he had an opportunity to set himself up for some more long term success, guarantee the great one, and here he is. You know, it's. He's not the great one. In terms of goal scoring, I think.

[Dan Le Batard]

When you lose this record and, and this is, this can be put on the pole by Juju. Please. When you lose the record for all time goals, do you go from the to A? I don't, I don't think that that is the threshold. But I don't want to ruin the poll because people may disagree with me and, but don't do it just for disagreeing. Jessica, when you fill out the poll, like, don't just say, don't worry, I'll.

[Jeremy]

Vote with my heart.

[Dan Le Batard]

I want you to vote with your conscience.

[Jeremy]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

With your belief system. I'm gonna stick with D. Just give me a hint. Jessica, which way are you going? Give me a hint.

[Jeremy]

My vote's private to me.

[Dan Le Batard]

My vote, my choice is that you're never gonna tell me what you voted.

[Jeremy]

No, never.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm just gonna have to guess. Yeah, maybe I'll text you tonight before 1:47 and just see what you voted.

[Jeremy]

How many hours before 1:47?

[Dan Le Batard]

Well, given what time you go to bed, it's gonna have to be around six hours.

[Jeremy]

I might be eating dinner. Probably not gonna text you back if I'm eating dinner. I'm probably going to get ready for bed, put my jammies on.

[Dan Le Batard]

So it's got to be eight hours before.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

Or are you now just, hey, leave it, leave it at work. If you don't get to me by the time we leave work. Then don't bother me.

[Jeremy]

Why don't you ask me the next time we see each other in person how I voted and I'll be honest.

[Dan Le Batard]

Maybe tomorrow morning.

[Jeremy]

I'm not on the schedule tomorrow, so.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, no, I can't text you, though.

[Jeremy]

I don't know.

[Dan Le Batard]

You always have an answer. Always have an answer.

[Billy Corben]

If you can get her, get her a text. What time's your, like, afternoon nap? Maybe if you fit in a text before that.

[Jeremy]

Like 5:00.

[Stugotz]

What's a good text window? You have a 5:00 nap.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's impossible.

[Stugotz]

What time do you wake up in the morning? No, from your nap?

[Jeremy]

Like 5, 40.

[Stugotz]

And it doesn't make you, like, more energized at night? It'd be harder for me to sleep if I took a nap.

[Jeremy]

45 minutes is nothing like a rock.

[Stugotz]

Really?

[Jeremy]

Yes.

[Stugotz]

Oh, man.

[Jeremy]

I could nap seven hours and still sleep nine.

[Stugotz]

What a gift. Cherish that as long as you have it.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, I don't. First of all, I think that's hyperbole. I doubt that you could nap seven and sleep nine. That would be 16 hours a day of sleep, like unaided, no drinks, no Ambien, just straight up.

[Jeremy]

I've never taken Ambien.

[Dan Le Batard]

Ooh, you should try it. You may like it. I mean, not if you can give 16 large. I think that everyone needs to tell me there. I think that's the right thing. I'm going to actually make that as part of my thing with metal arc. I would like a window. Give me your window. Everyone has a different schedule. I wouldn't have known that you nap at 5. I don't want to interrupt your nap.

[Jeremy]

Not every day.

[Dan Le Batard]

And I'm happy to actually follow that window. And I'm smart enough where I could actually have individual people like Billy. Do you put your kids to bed? Like it's seven.

[Stugotz]

So we start.

[Dan Le Batard]

Because you're tough to reach too.

[Stugotz]

I get back to you. Yes, I get back to you. But I have a difficult window. So it depends on having pickup and stuff like that. But bedtime usually starts. The process is like dinner, like 6ish. And then there's bath and there's bedtime and then it's usually like a process, like six to eight, 30 or nine, depending on how it goes. Yeah, it's a long process.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's a three hour process.

[Stugotz]

It's a tough process.

[Dan Le Batard]

Can I try to make that more efficient for you?

[Stugotz]

You want to come put my Kids to sleep. Be my guest.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm doing how I put my kids to sleep. I had a.

[Jeremy]

You're just gonna give your kids Ambien?

[Dan Le Batard]

No, I didn't do that with my kids. No, I read them a book.

[Jeremy]

I was joking.

[Dan Le Batard]

Okay, good. Thank you. Because I listen with you and me, you never know. But my view of my kids sleeping. Sleep, to me, was the most important thing for my kids because I wanted. It was selfish. I wanted not to have to deal with them. So getting them on a schedule as quickly as possible was critical. And doing it the same way every night, no matter where you were, no matter what time zone. Because then their brain sort of understands that, okay, after bath, it's PJs. After PJs, it's one book. And then you beg for the second book. You say, goodnight, moon. Shut her down. Lights out. The biggest parenting mistake is when people let their kids control their nighttime routine. And then you end up without a nighttime routine. And then you're just screwed.

[Stugotz]

Gotta be honest, it feels like you're lecturing me on parenting.

[Dan Le Batard]

No, I'm saying my. I would never lecture anyone. No, I'm the opposite guy. Women do that a lot. I noticed when my kids.

[Jessica]

What does that mean?

[Dan Le Batard]

It means mothers would get together and they would sort of compare each other's kids routines and what they were doing and making judgments on food. When I got together with guy friends, we never did that. We just talked about, when are we released from duty? Like, what time do your kids go to bed that you can then be free and do they stay asleep? So it's not women. Men. It's not a sex thing. It's just who's responsible. I loved. I was the diaper guy in my household. Oh, I did all the diapers.

[Jessica]

Dealing with shit, huh?

[Dan Le Batard]

I did. I didn't mind it. I did not. It's the weirdest thing. I did not mind it.

[Jeremy]

My text window for you just got a little smaller.

[Dan Le Batard]

Smaller than two minutes? Like, is it down to one?

[Jeremy]

You can text me between 7:00am when I'm leaving for work and let's say 4:30.

[Dan Le Batard]

Wow, that's a huge window.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

7:00Am to 4:30. I thought you were going to say working hours. You can text me from 7:01 to 7:03.

[Jeremy]

You know what?

[Billy Corben]

You're right.

[Jeremy]

That's better. PM.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, I thought you meant AM.

[Jeremy]

Okay.

[Jessica]

Small crack in that window, man.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm trying to just get some sort of info.

[Jeremy]

That's why I like using never text me at 1:47.

[Dan Le Batard]

Do you use military time? Am I the only one who does that?

[Jeremy]

Of course not.

[Dan Le Batard]

I. I exclusively imagine us booking guests.

[Jeremy]

And we're like, yeah, 6, 1600 works well for Dan.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think it's very clear because we just had a miscommunication right now. You said 701. If you had said 1901, then there's no problem. I know you meant nighttime.

[Jeremy]

Okay, next time I'll. I'll definitely clarify semantics.

[Stugotz]

Well, it seems like her window is not going to 12 anyways. So let's just assume if she says.

[Dan Le Batard]

Seven at 7am because, like, at 13:20, she's out OT.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, I think.

[Dan Le Batard]

Were you just doing the math, Billy?

[Stugotz]

1300 she's done.

[Dan Le Batard]

So I just watch you doing the math. 1:20pm That's 1:20.

[Jeremy]

Well, that's if I take an early nap. 13:01. Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

Can I give you the military code? The trick, it's very easy. Just subtract 12 from whatever number above 12 and that's what it is. So when we say 1830, 18 minus 12 is 6. That's 6:30pm Just subtract 12 from the number and then you can do military time.

[Jessica]

Yeah. It's simple.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, that is very simple.

[Jeremy]

Thank you for explaining that to us.

[Billy Corben]

Thank you.

[Dan Le Batard]

You're welcome.

[Stugotz]

Are the rabbits gonna be like, what kind of disease do the rabbits have to have for us to sacrifice them to the dogs?

[Jeremy]

If rabbits have a disease, the dogs are gonna get the disease if they ingest the rabbits. That's why you can't feed them sick rabbits.

[Stugotz]

Hmm.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think it's not a disease, Billy. I think they're just ready to die. They've lived a full life.

[Jessica]

It's old age.

[Stugotz]

Did I tell you how old do rabbits live?

[Jeremy]

They live pretty longer than you think.

[Dan Le Batard]

I would assume the over under for a rabbit's life is going to be 18 years.

[Jeremy]

If I had to, I don't think it's that long.

[Dan Le Batard]

So you're going under 18?

[Jeremy]

Yes.

[Stugotz]

I'm seeing domestic rabbits, like 8 to 12 on once.

[Dan Le Batard]

What's the under?

[Billy Corben]

My wife owned a rabbit that they got at the fair when she was in middle school in St. Augustine, where it was. They played one of those games where you throw rings onto a bottle. And at the end of it, they were giving out these little bunnies, which is crazy, of course, and totally unauthorized. And it was supposed to be a tiny little bunny, and then it grew into a giant rabbit that was in their backyard for about a decade. It lived to about a decade, which is pretty crazy. Because you would think if you got a little tiny rabbit from a fair, that certainly that was going to be an unhealthy rabbit. Turned out to be a very healthy rabbit.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's like the carnival fish.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah. His name was Benny.

[Dan Le Batard]

The ping pong balls that you put in the things and you did just like that. And generally it dies in the bag, right? Yeah.

[Jeremy]

We had a carnival fish for five years.

[Dan Le Batard]

I had. What was your fish's name?

[Jeremy]

Cleopatra.

[Dan Le Batard]

Mine was Herman. Wow.

[Stugotz]

Herman.

[Dan Le Batard]

I named my carnival fist Herman.

[Billy Corben]

The carnival fist.

[Dan Le Batard]

He didn't die. He made it all the way through my middle school. It was insane.

[Jeremy]

Your parents were just replacing it.

[Dan Le Batard]

I actually thought about that and I did that with my kids. With a gerbil. Gerbil died. Buried the gerbil. Replaced the gerbil.

[Jeremy]

Did they notice?

[Dan Le Batard]

Never noticed one. Nothing. Us.

[Jeremy]

So you are a liar.

[Dan Le Batard]

You're welcome.

[Sponsor Voice]

Kids.

[Dan Le Batard]

Should just be saying thank you for my gerbil. And by the way, when the gerbil's sick, you just flush it.

[Billy Corben]

No.

[Dan Le Batard]

What else do you do?

[Mike Ryan]

Hey, audience. You know, it's that time of year where everyone is debating who the number one pick is going to be. Well, let me tell you something that is undebatable. Who the world's number one vodka is. That is Smirnoff. And as fun as it is to debate whether or not the team with the number one pick goes pass rush or wide receiver, quarterback, one thing that we all know is we're going with Smirnoff as our number one vodka pick. Isn't that right, Dano?

[Dan Le Batard]

Smirnoff rules.

[Billy Corben]

Smirnoff rules.

[Mike Ryan]

So while you're over there hosting your draft parties, you know, one thing in particular you need. Well, there's two things that you absolutely need. The draft on tv, that's a must. But number two, what is it? Dano Smirnoff. Do you like Dano?

[Sponsor Voice]

Support the people who support us.

[Dan Le Batard]

Smirnoff supports us. I like Smirnoff. I. You don't like Dano.

[Mike Ryan]

And thanks to Smirnoff, God Bless Football is doing their first ever watch along livestream in front of a live audience in Nashville, Tennessee. Join God Bless Football during round one of the draft on the LeBatard Show YouTube channel on April 24th. More details to come. Please drink responsibly. Smirnoff, number 21, vodka distilled from grain, 40% alcohol by volume. The Smirnoff Company, New York, New York. Please do not share with anyone under legal drinking age. Folks, it's Mike Ryan. And do you know that Miller Lite has basically been a partner of this show for almost 20 years? And as we celebrate 50 years of Miller Lite, that means for a large chunk of it. And look, I didn't go to school for math, but I'm pretty sure that's like 80% of the time that Miller Lite's been existing. They've been with our show. And I'm so grateful for it because we truly believe this. If you listen to us back in our radio days, throughout our times in national radio, to the pirate face to now, you know that Miller Lite has been a huge supporter of ours. And I've always been a huge supporter of Miller Lite. Why? Because it's got tastes. You know, you can depend on a great beer. Trusted by beer lovers for 50 years. Miller Lite. Great taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up Miller Light pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.