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Mike Ryan
Hey, folks, it's Mike Ryan. And if you're watching our show, you probably know and your boy has undergone a little bit of a body transformation. And I gotta tell you, Peloton has helped me on my fitness journey. It got the ball rolling for me because I watch my wife on the peloton. She takes all these great classes. She has her favorite instructors. I listen to the music, I'm a big music guy. Gets me fired up. Makes me want to take part in this fitness phenomenon known as Peloton. Peloton offers a variety of challenging classes, from four week strength building classes to running, cycling, and everything in between. Peloton will help you achieve your goals and maybe you'll have some fun along the way. I know I have. It's backed by thousands of members whose lives have been changed. Be part of that group. Telling you I'm better for it. Have it in my office. Sometimes I can put on the baseball game. Sometimes I can put on a soccer match. Some other times, I'm totally locked in on an emo playlist. Find your push, find your power. With peloton@onepelaton.com Now's a good time to remember where tequila's story truly began. In 1795, Cuervo invented tequila. Cuervo, what are you doing here?
Stugatz
Cuervo.
Dan LeBatard
Anytime someone says Cuervo, I show up.
Mike Ryan
Well, I do know that to be true. But even during ad reads like Cuervo, I think he could lay out, especially for one of our great partners.
Dan LeBatard
Sweet, delicious Cuervo.
Mike Ryan
Since then, Cuervo has stayed true to its roots. The same family, the same land, the same passion.
Dan LeBatard
Cuervo.
Mike Ryan
So enjoy the tequila that started it all.
Dan LeBatard
Cuervo. Cuervo.
Mike Ryan
The tequila that invented tequila. Proximo. Cuervo.com, please drink responsibly.
Dan LeBatard
Cuervo. Shadow Show.
Stugatz
Shadow Show.
Dan LeBatard
Shadow Show.
Stugatz
Shadow Show.
Dan LeBatard
Shadow Show.
Stugatz
Shadow Show.
Dan LeBatard
Shadow Show.
Stugatz
Shadowing it. Shadowing it.
Dan LeBatard
Chris, I'm worried about today's show.
Stugatz
Hmm.
Dan LeBatard
Stugatz is hopped up on meds.
Stugatz
Oh, am I?
Dan LeBatard
He's got. He's got a bad toothache. His face is not quite swollen, but he's been just like, massaging the side of his face pretty continually. And him on drugs. More drugs than usual, right? No bueno or bueno.
Stugatz
You never know.
Dan LeBatard
Well, bueno for you. Not muy bueno. Not muy bueno for the rest of us. I'm also torn because I was very excited about talking about the disaster that Friday was for Meadowlark media and myself. But so Much happens that by the time we get in here and Zaz is in here now, the Heater now coming off of a 21 point loss. And so instead of celebrating, hooray, the Heater in the playoffs, they saved the season. We have old, you know, damp, limp Zaz in here. Not filled with fire.
Jonathan Zaslow
We can celebrate. That's Pearl Jam week.
Stugatz
I mean, I'm feeling great today and draft week.
Jonathan Zaslow
I mean, come on, what's going on.
Dan LeBatard
With you in draft week? Are you.
Stugatz
Tooth hurts.
Dan LeBatard
Okay, so he's going to be out with a toothache. You're supposed to be in Tennessee for the draft.
Jonathan Zaslow
People soft.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah, okay. Calling people soft and you might be out with a toothache. Those were bad games. Those were bad games over the weekend.
Stugatz
All of them.
Dan LeBatard
I mean, come on. Except for Clippers, Nuggets, the Clip, Warriors, Rockets.
Amin Elhassan
Was good, too.
Chris Cody
Good game.
Dan LeBatard
Was it? Yeah.
Chris Cody
Heat, Cavs.
Dan LeBatard
What are you nodding about? Says those were not good games.
Jonathan Zaslow
Rockets, Warriors. Fun game is my kind of basketball.
Stugatz
Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
Take me back to 1997. That's my kind of game. I loved it.
Dan LeBatard
You love defensive games.
Jonathan Zaslow
Love a good defensive battle.
Dan LeBatard
Zach loves six, three football games.
Jonathan Zaslow
Love the SEC. I love. I love a knockdown, drag out, NBA playoff game. I don't need the games in the 70s. All right? But every now and then, give me a game in the low 90s. I love it.
Dan LeBatard
This is the Don Levatar show with the Stugats podcast. Foreign. Let's talk about this for a second, because that Golden State Rockets game is not the basketball I want to see. I don't want games in the 80s and 90s. Okay? I know you guys are all staring at me because you want to talk about the stardom of Jimmy Butler and Steph Curry. However, Van Vlieten Green going 7 for 34 for two free throws. Get out of here, Rockets. Go now. Take your entire season and get out of here. All of you can just go. We all know that's what you're gonna be. You're not gonna beat the best teams in this conference. Thank you for trying the entire regular season, but Van vliet and green, seven for 34. Two free throws between them. And also Jimmy Butler, five steals. Yeah, five steals.
Stugatz
That's why the warriors were minus one 90 headed into that series. I mean, I was asking Amin about it last week, but we found out after a game why they were the favorites. Heavy favorites.
Dan LeBatard
You like that? So. So Draymond Green's talking after the game. I wonder how Heat fans feel about all this because Draymond Green's talking after the game. That's championship pedigree saying, yeah, Jimmy calms us down. We got to get Jimmy the ball more late. Everything slows down. Jimmy scores six of his points in the last minute 40. It is crazy to me to watch that team in game one of its playoffs defer to Jimmy Butler on, yeah, he calms us.
Jonathan Zaslow
I mean, he's not that that team needs it, but he's kind of the adult in the room. Like, they know, hey, this guy right here is super comfortable. He's super serious. And I'll tell you, there were moments in that game I was like, I missed that. I remember that. I remember, like, I remember being comfortable when that guy had the ball.
Dan LeBatard
I don't understand how it is that we've spent two seasons talking about Kaminga over there, and then they trade for Jimmy Butler. And Kaminga is a great asset, and he's top shelf, and we got to get him playing minutes and never mind.
Amin Elhassan
Funny thing is, he played really well against the Rockets this season. He averaged like 23, 24 a game against the Rockets, but he's just fallen out of the rotation completely. I was talking to Amin last week, and I was like, why is it that Kaminga just all of a sudden, who was such a good piece, is now gone out of the rotation? He's not playing. He's like. He's not plus at anything that he can do with Draymond and Jimmy on the floor. It's just he's an extra piece that fits the same hole that they play already.
Jonathan Zaslow
And he's a free agent. He's got to be so mad.
Amin Elhassan
Restricted, though. Restricted.
Jonathan Zaslow
So it's tough. He's got to be so mad, though. He's the dmp. He's gonna be a free agent.
Chris Cody
That's the thing with Kaminga and Jimmy, though. That's the difference, is Jimmy does everything well. He complements both Draymond and Steph in the way that he plays his game because he can allow Draymond to do different things defensively, Steph to do different things offensively, and then you can run everything through him. And he's a calming presence where Kaminga and his inexperience is part of the problem. So when you switch those two things, that's why the warriors are willing to defer. They're always used to having another guy there who's an adult in the room with them. It just happens to be a guy in Jimmy who's one of the best postseason players around.
Dan LeBatard
I'm going to do this again. A ton of bad games. Bad games. What you going. What you going. What you going to do? Wind and Avatar judges. You tell me what she going to do. What you going to do? Hey, bad games, bad games. What you going to do? What you gonna do? And then judges you back to guns when Jimmy Butler goes 25. 5, 5, 5 with the five steals.
Stugatz
Yep.
Dan LeBatard
Did anyone else in that game have four steals? Did anyone. Five steals in a playoff game where the possessions are mattering? And in that playoff game, one of the few that is in the 80s and 90s to find yourself watching a basketball game. And Jimmy Butler is one of three players ever to have high end numbers in play. 25, 5, 5, 5. The five steals as well. The other two are Jordan and Westbrook. For him at the end of that game to be in a locker room where Draymond Green is saying out loud, we need to get him the ball more on a team with Steph Curry.
Stugatz
Well, of course.
Dan LeBatard
Well, but what do you mean, of course?
Stugatz
I mean, you got Jimmy Butler to give him the ball and give him the ball often. That's why you went out and got Jimmy Butler.
Dan LeBatard
You say. You say, of course the team has Steph Curry on it. To hear in a locker room, the least calm player in the league saying of Jimmy Butler, when he's played with plenty of calm, saying, that guy calms us because he slows everything down. He's going to get free throws and he's in a game again. I'm going to say it. Van Vlieten Green, 7 for 34, two free throws between them. You cannot beat a champion that way.
Stugatz
But I think when Draymond says that, that Jimmy calms us, it's just having that second guy. Without Jimmy Butler, that team has no shot of winning an NBA title. With Jimmy Butler, that team is now more constructed the way it used to be. Although Jimmy is a very different player than Klay Thompson, they have a second scoring option on that team. And it's Jimmy Butler, see, that brings the team comfort.
Jonathan Zaslow
That's what I think. I think it's. It's not Draymond saying, if we want to win, Jimmy has to have the ball. No, it's. We need somebody other than Steph. Yes. Like, it's not going to be Pajimsky. It's not going to be Moses Moody.
Stugatz
It's not going to be me.
Jonathan Zaslow
It can't. It's only me. It can't be all Stephen, give Jimmy the basket. I think that's what it's about a.
Dan LeBatard
Couple of things that I, of course that's what it's about. But it's still there. Like I, I, it's not, I'm not confused.
Stugatz
I'm not confused.
Jonathan Zaslow
I thought you sounded confused. You didn't know if Jimmy Butler's any good.
Stugatz
Yes, Very confused.
Dan LeBatard
Yes, he's good.
Stugatz
Yeah. I mean, he asked us.
Dan LeBatard
Thank you, guys. I appreciate.
Tony
Yes, we're here for you.
Stugatz
It's Monday.
Dan LeBatard
I appreciate that. He's good.
Stugatz
Tooth is killing me.
Dan LeBatard
Well, let's talk about this for a second because I've given you guys the stat before, which is an insanity. Jimmy Butler, 0. 40 point games in his regular season career, 840 point games in the playoffs. To have the first game play out that way, because we're sitting here really, you guys understand, all of us do. What we're betting on how many injections, how many knee things is he going to have to overcome? Because it always looks this way. Game one, when he's fresh and rested and 35 and five steals, then you start fast forwarding mileage on the body, what this stuff takes out of the body, and you're waiting for a breakdown. The bet between the Heat and the warriors on Jimmy is not, he ain't going to make it to the end of that. You know, he's not going to make it to the end of that. And the bet the warriors are making is like, just give us seven or eight stuff will take us the rest of the way. Just get us half, just get us halfway there. And it's such an interesting bet on, like, how a window closes quickly because everybody's like, oh, my God. By 50, they took out Memphis. They took out Memphis by 50. Like, that team's here. That, that team can only be beaten right now by what you got? Clippers, what you got? Warriors? What you got? Old guys? Lakers. What it. It ain't going to get beaten by Houston.
Amin Elhassan
Houston's done. Houston's done already.
Stugatz
You guys are done with the Rockets.
Jonathan Zaslow
No, no, no.
Amin Elhassan
I'm going to blame Izzy Gutierrez. I'm going to blame Izzy Gutierrez. Last week on Friday, he send the praises of the Rockets. They're the great. They're. Oh, my God, they're gonna sweep the Warriors. They're incredible. He's like, jalen Green's gonna come out. He's like, fred Van Vleet's gonna be amazing. And it's like 7 for 34, two free throws.
Dan LeBatard
Like you said, playoffs are different, man.
Jonathan Zaslow
The Rockets are so tough. Like, that was their whole deal. They're they're the tough guys. You'll win your tough guy games in the regular season. Everybody's tough in the playoffs. Nobody cares.
Stugatz
You're tough.
Chris Cody
It feels a little bit Houston like Oklahoma City last year. Just a year too early. Overachie good.
Dan LeBatard
No.
Chris Cody
And that's the difference between Houston and Oklahoma City moving forward. They have. Well, right. But they have all of these incredible complimentary pieces that are young. They have sengun who's a great guy to build around. But the question would become if they end up going out in the first round to a veteran laden warriors, how do you handle the stockpile picks and all of these great young players? This experience is huge. Game two is a giant game for the future of their franchise. Not just this season, but moving forward.
Jonathan Zaslow
I mean, do come tough.
Stugatz
I thought you like toughness.
Dan LeBatard
No, he's done zaz you that nobody cares that you're tough. You're, you're, you spit that. You, you, you are very. Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
What? Playoff teams aren't tough. You're not playing the Hornets. All right. You know, you're not playing the Wizards. It's the playoffs.
Stugatz
Tough. He's right. It's the playoffs.
Dan LeBatard
He's right about, he's right about everything that he says there. But the thing that I want to get to as it relates to the, the Rockets and the years because I think that the two games from the weekend Clippers Nuggets is going to be fantastic. It really is. And I heard one of you guys say in the middle of that, best player in the league. And it made me laugh seeing James Harden interviewed and James Harden tells Rachel Nichols, yeah, we're all rooting for Shea Gilgames Alexander to win the MVP award. He should win it because of the season he had and the winning. But Jokic is the best player obviously. And of course, like.
Amin Elhassan
And he's had the better season.
Dan LeBatard
No, but the stupidity of that, like the just the sheer stupidity of like, yeah, Shay, Shay, give it to him because yeah, we, but, but yes, of course Jokic is the best player in the world. Yes, but not even, not even he hit the. Of course. It wasn't even like this is my opinion. He was just saying no, this is a matter of fact. We've all discussed it. The rest of us are over here and Jokic is the best player in the world.
Jonathan Zaslow
Players in today's NBA constantly complain, right. About the analysis. They don't like the analysis on television these days. And James Harden's getting in front of a camera telling you, we know that guy is better, but we want him to win.
Amin Elhassan
I mean, that's what happened. LeBron, right. As LeBron was the best player on the planet. But we're going to give it to Derek Rose.
Dan LeBatard
That's what's going to happen for sure. And it's only so that Jokic, five years from now, we don't have to put him ahead of Jordan.
Stugatz
Like, who is doing that? Let's be honest.
Dan LeBatard
Right. Okay. As an offensive player, I'd be willing to do it right now.
Stugatz
No, you would.
Dan LeBatard
I would be. As an offensive player, I right now would be willing to say that Jokic is a better, more efficient offensive player than Michael Jordan.
Jonathan Zaslow
My son just blurted out to me a couple days ago, is Jokic the best center in the history of the NBA already? And I, like, I thought about it for a second. Yeah, I wanted. I wanted to say. I don't know.
Stugatz
He's not. I mean, that's the answer. You know Kareem Russell. Well, that's.
Dan LeBatard
That's Allen Iverson. You're doing something here. As I understand. We're never going to actually give this to him. We're not. There's no circumstance under which America is going to be good with. Yeah, Jokic was the best at that ever. Like, there's nothing he can win the next 10. We won't do it.
Jonathan Zaslow
I didn't know what to say to my son.
Stugatz
You say no.
Dan LeBatard
I mean, yeah, well, that's the easier way to do it.
Stugatz
Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
Or I could try and tell the truth.
Stugatz
Well, no, you're lying.
Dan LeBatard
No, but that's the thing. See, it's better. It is much better to do it toothache way if you do it his way. If you just teach your children. No, you don't explain anything. They don't learn anything. They go through life dumb. If you try to explain nuance to them, you're going to end up making the argument that Jokic is better than Michael Jordan offensively, and you're going to sound like an idiot.
Jonathan Zaslow
Stugotz, how do you feel about nuance?
Stugatz
What is nuance?
Mike Ryan
Howdy, folks. It's Mike Ryan here to remind you that Game Time is the official ticketing partner of the Dan LeBatard show with Stu Gotz. As you know, I talk about game time plenty on the show because I use it plenty. And the weather is warming up. It is a perfect time to take family or friends, a whole lot of folks take them to a ball game. But before you do, why don't you check out the GameTime app?
Dan LeBatard
Why?
Mike Ryan
Because GameTime makes getting tickets even faster and easier. Here, prices on the gametime app actually go down the closer it gets A first pitch with killer last minute deals, all in prices, views from your seat and the lowest price guarantee Game Time takes the guesswork out of buying MLB tickets. What if you're one of those fans that likes to travel the nation and go to all these different ballparks? Sometimes you don't know what you're getting yourself into. You're not familiar. Well, those panoramic seat views on the app. They certainly help almost as much as that all in pricing tab to make sure there are no surprises is at checkout. Take the guesswork out of buying tickets with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account and use code DAN for $20 off. Your first purchase terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code dan for $20 off. Download the Gametime app today. Last minute tickets, lowest price guaranteed.
Dan LeBatard
Guys.
Chris Cody
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Tony
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Stugatz
Don LeBatard, Lightning Panthers. What do you think?
Dan LeBatard
Stugats.
Jonathan Zaslow
Look at this face while I tell this to you, okay? Because I don't want there to be any kind of confusion. You look me right in the eye. There's gonna take that ass, man.
Amin Elhassan
This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stug.
Dan LeBatard
Zazzle. I want to get back to what happened Friday night.
Jonathan Zaslow
What a night.
Dan LeBatard
Oh, man.
Jonathan Zaslow
Let's go. What do you think Pearl Jam's gonna open with on Thursday?
Stugatz
Oh, wow.
Dan LeBatard
Zaslow is going to be working for money around here throughout the hockey playoffs. That's a big giant win for Zaslow for no money. No, he won the bet.
Stugatz
Play.
Jonathan Zaslow
I got everything.
Stugatz
Oh, wow. You got the money, and you got the tickets. Oh, my goodness.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah. He won the bet. So he gets a microphone.
Jonathan Zaslow
He gets money, and my wife is happy.
Dan LeBatard
He gets a happy wife. So Friday was a logistical disaster, okay. For a number of different reasons. First off, and I didn't know any of this, evidently, when we go live at night off of something, the sponsorship on this and the evening costs a great deal of money. Like, to just get up and live. It's something that DraftKings does a very good job of selling. So I had to find a sponsor. While we're sort of trying to navigate the logistical minefield of can a Corporation in 2025 make Zaslow an indentured servant publicly, where he is basically someone who has to work for me for no, and evidently no labor laws can we do that live? So it was a little bit dangerous, and I had to Go Stugatz and do something I obviously never thought I would have to do. And certainly something that Miles over at the restaurant Prime112 wasn't looking to do, which is I had to secure a sponsorship in, like, 45 minutes. And they're expensive. And so Prime 112 decided that they were going to sponsor what it is that we were doing because they wanted to back the heat and they wanted to back Zaslow's bet. And they. This is the. You know, this is a restaurant that's been a giant in this town for a long time, but they've never done a sponsorship. They don't need to do that.
Stugatz
It's been.
Dan LeBatard
It's the best restaurant we've got down here. And so they threw their. They threw their whole backing behind big steaks. Big steaks. And I had, like. I'm running late to get back there because I've got a car full of steaks that have been cooked for presentation.
Jonathan Zaslow
He had so much meat.
Stugatz
I mean, what a car. A car full of steaks.
Amin Elhassan
Where'd you get the Anaconda Glizzy, by the way? What was up? You put that in your car?
Dan LeBatard
This was an unusual amount of food to have in the car. Excellent food meant for presentation. But also, there was a steak in there that's like $700. Like, there's some ridiculous steak. And so I make it to the finish line, barely to get live on air with. With Sampson mad at us and saying not to do it. And then Meadowlark loses in every way, and Zaz wins in every way in overtime. Buddy was himself.
Jonathan Zaslow
Oh, I was so. But I was. I was so nervous. But. But that's. I love the adrenaline. I love the agita it gives me. It's my drug. I'm a drug addict in that moment. I love it. It's the best kind of high for me when I'm nervous like that with either the Heat or the Panthers. And you got to see it on full display, which I wasn't terribly comfortable with in the moment because I don't think I've ever done that where everybody could see me living it. I came close a couple times to throw in the remote control through the television. But, I mean, listen, do you think Pearl Jam plays for two and a half hours or for three on Thursday? It's gonna be so great.
Amin Elhassan
Shame on you guys. By the way, Amino Hassan was here in Miami. Got on a flight, flew six hours, and then you guys sent them the link to do more show when he got home.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah. And that's what we were gonna do to Zaslo for no money. What we were gonna do to Zaslo that caused corporate problems is the idea that in 2025, you can't exactly turn somebody, you know who is an employee into the equivalent of an indentured.
Jonathan Zaslow
Why? I'm an adult. I'm not 14.
Stugatz
They agreed to the term.
Dan LeBatard
There are labor laws, though. There are. I don't know, man. Don't ask me how it is that corporate things get in the way of every fun thing I try to do.
Stugatz
Can I ask you who got the $700 steak? Can I ask you that you're eat it?
Dan LeBatard
A friend of mine. No, I didn't eat it. I gave it to a friend of mine. Yes, did that. You just wanted to know that.
Stugatz
Well, I mean, we all wanted to know who got the $700 steak.
Jonathan Zaslow
Would you have swung by his house if he still had it in the fridge after the show today?
Stugatz
Yeah, I would have. Yeah.
Dan LeBatard
Not true in any way. Yes. My tooth, though. He says, what is going on with your tooth? What is the story of your tooth that you're saying you get? He's already saying, I'm not going to make it to the end of the show. I think I'm going to have to leave early. I've got an emergency.
Stugatz
Yeah, it is. It's shooting up all sides of my head, Dan. It hurts. I don't know. It's a classic, too. A toothache is an underrated pain, is it not? I mean, I was thinking about this since yesterday, since I got the toothache, about some underrated pains. I actually have a top five here.
Dan LeBatard
Hold on. We're not understanding the premise, though. Underrated pain means that it is a pain that is good.
Stugatz
No, it's bad. I don't think you think about a toothache until you have a toothache, and then you realize just how bad it is.
Amin Elhassan
Okay, gotcha. So it's not. It's not like, oh, this is. This hurts, but it kind of feels good. It's like, this feels bad, but I didn't know how bad it would feel until I had it.
Stugatz
Right. You break a rib, you know it's gonna hurt, right? You think about it, you know it's gonna hurt. With a toothache, it's something you never think about until you have it. And then when you have it, you realize, wow, this is the worst pain ever.
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah, but if you said that's a very underrated movie, that means, like, it's a great movie and people don't talk about it enough.
Stugatz
This is a great pain that people don't talk about enough.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah, but a great pain meaning a bad pain, not a great pain meaning a good pain. Right. We're confused by what your premise is.
Stugatz
I think when you ask people what's the most pain you've ever been in? No one's going to say toothache. But if you ask someone who has a toothache, most pain you ever been in, they'll tell you it's a toothache.
Dan LeBatard
Okay.
Stugatz
You don't know unless you're in it.
Dan LeBatard
Okay, all understood and well put. But I still think our game is flawed because top five most underrated pains makes me feel like it's a pain someone would enjoy. You're saying it's not a pain.
Stugatz
These are pains that people don't talk.
Jonathan Zaslow
You know enough about pain that someone enjoys. What's a pain that someone enjoys?
Dan LeBatard
There's a lot of. There's a lot of pleasure pain, people. Yes. Are you saying that these are top five pains that we don't talk about enough? That's a totally different list. It's not underrated.
Stugatz
It's my list.
Dan LeBatard
I know, but I'm asking you what we're calling it for the clarity of the audience.
Stugatz
Underrated pains.
Tony
Everyone's confused on this. Stu, I'm right there with you.
Dan LeBatard
This is locked in.
Tony
I know exactly what you're saying.
Chris Cody
Top five pains people forget about.
Dan LeBatard
It can't be top five pains that.
Stugatz
People don't think about unless they're going through them.
Dan LeBatard
Okay.
Stugatz
Is that better?
Tony
The mouthful.
Dan LeBatard
But it is.
Stugatz
It's wordy. But Dan's making me change the name of my list.
Dan LeBatard
Well, just because I think it's confusing. You confuse the people we're doing the show with, so I'm assuming you're confused audience. I know that he's with you, but that is not the ally you want. Old heavy tongue. Old heavy tongue. Look, that's a new podcast too. Thin heavy tongue that you, you and go ahead, feel free to do a little demo, you and him right here. Because I don't. I think Stugatz is going to be slurring by the end of the show. I saw him popping the meds. He doesn't do this healthy. What he does is he keeps taking pills, thinking, when is that going to make the pain stop? He's not allowing for any of it to get into the bloodstream.
Stugatz
I took four Advil. I took a Tylenol. I had two pieces of bacon and a couple of gummies.
Dan LeBatard
Well, this is this is the thing. Okay, let's cover this for a second. Let me explain to you how this 420 dinner. Let me explain to you the hot breath that greeted my right ear this morning. I'm writing down some notes. I'm busy preparing for the show. And I hear and feel and smell something greasy appear next to me. It smells like bacon.
Stugatz
Yeah.
Dan LeBatard
It has bacon in its hand. And it is telling me while chewing what a terrible toothache it has.
Stugatz
The worst.
Dan LeBatard
While chewing, I smell the bacon and feel the bacon on my ear while he tells me I think I have to leave early because I've got a toothache. And the toothache is a terribly underrated pain.
Stugatz
You noticed I was chewing on the left side. Right, right. Left side only. No pressure on right side.
Dan LeBatard
Right.
Tony
Now on the opposite side.
Dan LeBatard
I didn't notice because I wasn't looking at you. I was trying not to look into the breath that was hot and greasy and of bacon.
Stugatz
So I didn't understood.
Dan LeBatard
I didn't want my bacon breath.
Tony
Could be worse.
Dan LeBatard
I didn't want my eyebrows singed. I will tell the people again that Stugatz is the only person in this particular establishment who walks around with his breakfast in the morning. No napkins, no nothing. Just bacon in his hand, grease going down. Never seen a napkin. It's just eating bacon. And whether it's his left side or his right, he was telling me about his toothache while chewing bacon. So put it on the poll at Lebiton show. Do you really have a toothache if you're chewing bacon while telling someone about it?
Stugatz
Oh, it's not very believable.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah, you know, it's. It's incriminating, circumstantial evidence that would suggest that you're guilty of lying.
Chris Cody
But this is where we get back into why Dan's confused about underrated pain. Because if the toothache hurts so good, right. You want the pain, you chew where you have the toothache and you're forcing more of the pain. And that's where you could think. You could think underrated pain, a pain. You want to have the toothache. But what you're saying is that this is a pain that you don't want to have, that you don't think about enough. I can understand why we had to get into the nitty gritty on this.
Stugatz
If I were to ask you right now, most painful experiences you've ever had, you would probably not say a toothache, right? Unless you had an actual toothache.
Jonathan Zaslow
I had gout once. That's the most Painful.
Stugatz
That's bad. Yeah.
Tony
Is that properly rated?
Jonathan Zaslow
Yeah. I would never say it's underrated.
Stugatz
Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
And people would understand my description of you, right?
Stugatz
Yeah.
Dan LeBatard
I don't believe that there is a funnier word that you could have had in the middle of that sentence than I had gout once.
Jonathan Zaslow
It's the rich man's disease.
Dan LeBatard
Gout. I don't. You're gonna have to tell me more about gout, because I only know it as a funny word. And so I need. I need more information on this for me in the audience at Lebatard show. Do you know the symptoms of gout? I will say that gout is a funny word to me, at least in part, because I only associate it kind of like shingles. 80 year old. 80 year old.
Jonathan Zaslow
And plus, it's a king's disease.
Stugatz
Well done.
Dan LeBatard
Put it on the poll at Levitate show. Is gout the king's disease? Why is it the king's disease?
Jonathan Zaslow
Because it originated from kings back hundreds of years ago. They would get all the fine meats, and they would eat so much of it. And when you eat too much of that kind of food, of meat, meat, the red meat, it causes gout. So it was known as the king's disease. So I was eating like a king that week.
Dan LeBatard
It's also associated with alcohol consumption.
Stugatz
Mm.
Tony
I'm just looking up different, like, interesting, odd, like, syndromes you can get. Because, like, I'm just thinking, are there any other ones that are in this.
Dan LeBatard
You know, funny, funny diseases, gout, shingles, like, stuff. Stuff that you can make fun of. Because it's terrible. It's painful. Yeah. It's awful. But you're not crossing the line into mocking someone who's got family that has been lost.
Jonathan Zaslow
Abs to gouge.
Tony
Like, I wouldn't want to have alien hand syndrome. Which is what? A condition where one hand acts independently of a person's conscious control.
Amin Elhassan
Happens to my baby all the time. She's got hands all over the place. Doesn't know how to control her hands.
Tony
Exploding head syndrome, a sleep disorder where a person experiences a loud, sudden noise in their head upon falling asleep or.
Jonathan Zaslow
Waking up, and then the head explodes.
Dan LeBatard
People don't die from gout, right?
Stugatz
I don't think so.
Chris Cody
I got it.
Tony
I wanted to hate it.
Stugatz
Pretty good. Has anyone ever.
Dan LeBatard
Do not encourage him, okay? Do not encourage him. Do you realize that Friday night, four minutes into the broadcast, I had to tell him to stop talking like a broadcaster? Do not encourage him with the puns. Chris. Cody. Chris, listen to me. Lock in here. Okay. Right here. If you encourage the bad puns, there will be more bad puns. We have not been able. Lock in with me here, Chris.
Tony
My bad.
Dan LeBatard
We have not been able to discourage the bad puns, even while tasering, punishing, and generally hating the bad puns.
Jonathan Zaslow
Pun.
Chris Cody
It hurts so good.
Tony
Punish. Punishing him.
Stugatz
What puns?
Dan LeBatard
Yeah, stay with me. Okay.
Stugatz
Lock in.
Tony
Come back. Sorry.
Dan LeBatard
On Friday night, Stakes for his life, Jonathan Zaslow won concert tickets and won being able to work here during the playoffs and evidently have a little bit of his run of the place because he. I thought he was going to be in this room, and now he's that room, and so we've got a chemical agent here. Now that is going to be problematic over the next few months because he won a giant bet. My WI fi wasn't working. That was embarrassing. My WI fi generally all weekend wasn't working, which made games more difficult to come by. I want to ask you guys at Lebatard show, are you proper bleeped if your WI fi doesn't work for a whole weekend? Question mark? Mark. I have come to rely on things more than I. I thought I had the most gangster of WI fi. I thought there wasn't an ability for me not to have the best WI fi on the beach. But my WI fi wasn't working, and I was totally nuked on my weekend in terms of itchiness because I couldn't get to things that I could normally get to.
Jonathan Zaslow
Is that one of the packages when you're choosing? They have, like, three, four different WI fi packages. Silver, gold, Gangster.
Stugatz
Yes. Yeah. Best on the beach.
Dan LeBatard
Yes. I went to the top of the food chain. Is like, what's the most I can give to have the best? What do I have to do to have the proper cables, wires, everything, so I don't have to rely on things that my neighbors are relying on.
Amin Elhassan
I got bad news. I think you got to leave the beach, Dan. I think there's. I'm not gonna name names. I'm not gonna say anything, but I know some people live on the beach, too, and they're not happy with the service provider over there. You guys have your own rules over there, by the way. Us on the mainland, we get normal stuff. We get, you know, people that. That, you know, the fiber optic cables and whatnot. You guys over there, they're treating you guys differently. I don't know. You should look into that.
Chris Cody
I want to stop and celebrate for a second, because I think we just had a sentence set on this show that's never been said in the history of mankind. Putting a group of words together which is, I thought I had the most gangster of WI fi.
Stugatz
What does that mean?
Chris Cody
Congratulations, Dan. You've done something no one's ever done, which is said that sentence.
Dan LeBatard
Thank you. I appreciate it, Jeremy. But I did think that I had had good WI fi. And evidently I did not. But. So the unfortunate part about this is I was setting this whole thing up. The whole thing was something that I was trying to do in order to have Zaslow squirm around. Michael Wilbon and Brian windhorse.
Jonathan Zaslow
We're up 10 nothing right out the gate.
Dan LeBatard
Because he has said bad things about Wind Horse and Wilbond. And he's climbing at espn. I wanted to make Zaslo sit. I was trying to get a hold of Wind Horse. Wilbond shows up. And I see the fear sweep across Zaslo's face.
Stugatz
Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
And on top of it, Dan's WI fi is gangster. Wi Fi craps out. And it's just me and Wilbon.
Stugatz
What are you doing?
Jonathan Zaslow
And I've never spoken a word to him in my life. And I've said terrible things about him.
Dan LeBatard
He has ridiculed him on air for 10 years like this. So now listen to what. But I couldn't even be there to enjoy the awkward of it. Scugot. Because my WI fi was bought.
Stugatz
Gangster WI fi.
Dan LeBatard
Gangster WI fi was balky. And so I leave Zaslo and Wilbond alone. I can't even hear. I'm trying to hit Zaslow in the third quarter with the discomfort of. Here's Wilbon. Here's Joy Taylor. Here's Wind Horse.
Tony
Here's the heat blowing their third quarter.
Dan LeBatard
Correct. Correct. I didn't plan for that. That part worked out fine. My wife. I didn't screw that up.
Jonathan Zaslow
Do you think Wilbon knows that he was a tool the week hall of Famer in my studio. He's one of the only four inductees.
Stugatz
Wow.
Jonathan Zaslow
It's a banner of him in my studio. It's 790. The ticket.
Stugatz
He should be honored.
Tony
Did he call you? Johnny calls Dan. Danny has this thing. He likes putting a Y at the end.
Dan LeBatard
I love that. Guys. You let Zaslo skip past with. He was in a closed room. I had disappeared talking to someone. He's ripped for 10 years. And you guys didn't just hear him say tool of the Week hall of Famer. That.
Tony
That you're from this market.
Chris Cody
You know?
Dan LeBatard
But.
Stugatz
So one of four.
Dan LeBatard
I was about to present Wilbur with that information in front of Zaslow. Correct. And my wi fi didn't allow it. And so I. But I'm not talking about when I say the whole scramble was for that. It wasn't. The whole reason I wanted to do all of that is because I simply wanted Zaslow in a position where he had answered to two elders about things, terrible things he's been saying for 10 years.
Stugatz
Aren't you intrigued, though? Don't you want to know the other three Tools of the week? I mean, I know one of Jimmy SEO has to be in there. I just.
Dan LeBatard
I just mentioned two of them. Will Bon and Wind Horse are in. We've already covered the other two.
Chris Cody
Wendy. Two.
Amin Elhassan
Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
He was inaugural inductee.
Tony
Are we going back as far as Heath Bell in this tool hall?
Stugatz
He was.
Tony
I remember this hall.
Jonathan Zaslow
Deserve it.
Dan LeBatard
Yep. Tool of the week. And who was the fourth?
Jonathan Zaslow
I forgot Jeffrey. Lauria.
Stugatz
Ah, of course. No Sephi. Huh?
Dan LeBatard
Oli?
Stugatz
Yeah.
Jonathan Zaslow
Now, again, it's not me putting them in. It was our listeners. They put them in.
Dan LeBatard
Time now for top five Stugot's underrated pains.
Stugatz
We're back to that. Huh?
Dan LeBatard
Oli?
Stugatz
Yeah. I've won. Stepping on a Lego.
Dan LeBatard
So is that an underrated pain or is that.
Stugatz
It's an underrated pain. You never think about it as an actual pain until you step on an actual. Like, each one of these is going.
Tony
To confuse me a little bit.
Stugatz
You were with me five minutes ago. Two things.
Dan LeBatard
Okay.
Stugatz
I need you, man.
Dan LeBatard
Underrated pain.
Stugatz
Number four, A paper cut.
Dan LeBatard
Underrated with you. Okay. What? So it. No, that's a pain. You know, it's. We joke about paper cuts. Nobody likes them, though. They're bad.
Jonathan Zaslow
They're rated completely properly.
Tony
Most people don't know though.
Stugatz
My list.
Dan LeBatard
What do you mean they don't know?
Tony
A lot of people have not had a paper cut.
Stugatz
Yeah.
Tony
Put on the poll. More people have not. I think it's like less than 50% of people have had a paper cut.
Dan LeBatard
All right, hold on. At Lebaton show. That's a good question. Hold on, everyone. Slow down.
Stugatz
By the way, no one's ever died from gout.
Dan LeBatard
Okay? So that's the line. I think we can all agree wherever it is, that cancel culture resides. I think we can all agree the line is we can make fun of the disease if no one has ever died from it.
Stugatz
It leads to things, though.
Tony
I'm just reading. Yes, it is.
Stugatz
But no direct death.
Tony
Not the direct reason for death, but it has increased the King's Disease gout That's right.
Dan LeBatard
It's. It has to be an old man's disease, does it not?
Jonathan Zaslow
I wasn't old.
Stugatz
Well, you are old.
Dan LeBatard
At Lebanon show, have more people had paper cuts than haven't had paper cut cuts?
Stugatz
Huh?
Dan LeBatard
At Lebaton show, because I think what he. He's saying that the grand majority of humans have never touched paper in a way that has cut them, which doesn't make sense to me.
Tony
But we've all had one.
Dan LeBatard
Anyone who's touched. I feel like if I say everyone who's touched paper, more than half of those people have had a paper cut. Yes. If you've ever touched paper, you've had a paper.
Tony
Tony seems like a guy that's never had a paper.
Amin Elhassan
No, I've had a paper cut, so I had a paper. A paper ruler. You know how sometimes they send you. If you're going to put like a TV up or whatever, they send you like a paper ruler so you can put it on the wall all measured or whatever. It was furled together and then I went to unfurl it and my finger got stuck on the side and it, like, ripped.
Tony
That's not a paper.
Dan LeBatard
That's bad.
Amin Elhassan
No, it is an absolute paper cut. It cut me, like almost half my finger cut off. It's crazy.
Dan LeBatard
All right, so hold on. But what you're alleging. Chris, Cody, what you're trying to say is that everyone, everyone has had a paper cut. If you've been around paper, but you're saying half the world hasn't held paper, correct?
Tony
No, I think a lot of people have had. Had plenty of experiences holding paper and just haven't had a paper cut. I think it's. It's rare to get a paper cut. It's not like every 10 pieces of paper I touch, I'm getting a paper cut. I've had one, but I think I've had one in my entire life and I've touched a lot of paper.
Stugatz
Okay.
Tony
I got some strong paper bona fides.
Dan LeBatard
All right, then the question is, at Lebatard show, I'm gonna make it less wordy. Have you ever had a paper cut?
Tony
There it is.
Dan LeBatard
I like that. No. Number two, toothache.
Stugatz
A stub. At number three, by the way, a stubbing of the toe.
Tony
Man, I want to be locked in with you.
Dan LeBatard
But underrated.
Tony
This is such a properly rated.
Dan LeBatard
All right.
Jonathan Zaslow
Everyone knows these things hurt so bad, all right?
Stugatz
Yeah, I don't think so.
Dan LeBatard
Stuarts, what is this list? It's top five.
Stugatz
It's top five things that you don't know are really painful until you're experiencing them. Okay, it's getting wordier. All right, number two, Funny bone. Nothing funny about it. Seriously?
Jonathan Zaslow
You know what? I think that's the first decent one on your list.
Tony
People think it's funny.
Stugatz
Thank you.
Jonathan Zaslow
Nothing funny about it.
Stugatz
And number one, David Sampson pain.
Dan LeBatard
An underrated pain.
Stugatz
Oh, he's underrated? Yeah.
Dan LeBatard
A pain you don't know just how.
Stugatz
Painful David Sampson could be until you're dealing with David Sampson. He's a pain in the ass.
Dan LeBatard
Yes.
Stugatz
I mean, calling me on weekends. Leave me alone. I mean, Jesus.
Jonathan Zaslow
Folks, listen up.
Tony
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Mike Ryan
Today, it's the 50th anniversary of Miller Light. And for many of those 50 years, they've been partnered up with the Dan Leitard Show. Back to our terrestrial radio days, all throughout national syndication. Pirate Face, where we are now so grateful for that partnership because you guys know, we believe it. It's a beer for people who love their beer. And hopefully our audience loves their beer enough to always trust Miller Lite like I do. From game night parties with friends or a special anniversary like 20 years together on air, celebrating important occasions means more moments with the coolest people in your life. Cheers to 50 years of Miller Light, the great tasting light beer for people who Love beer since 1975, it's Miller time. Miller Light is brute for taste. Simply put, it just hits different because of those simple ingredients like malted barley for rich balanced toffee note flavors and the iconic golden color. Oh, and that white can do. I love that white can. 96 calories and just 3.2 grams of carbs per 12 ounces. Miller time is always a good time. Miller Lite great taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer here. It's Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.
Podcast Summary: The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
Episode: Local Hour: Top 5 Underrated Pains
Release Date: April 21, 2025
Hosts:
In this engaging episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz, the hosts delve into a variety of topics spanning sports analysis, personal anecdotes, and a humorous yet insightful discussion on the "Top 5 Underrated Pains." Broadcasting live from the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, Dan Le Batard and Stugotz, along with their co-hosts, provide a unique blend of humor, sharp commentary, and relatable conversations that cater to both sports enthusiasts and casual listeners.
a. Heat vs. Warriors Playoff Dynamics
The episode opens with an intense discussion about the recent playoff games, particularly focusing on the Miami Heat's performance against the Golden State Warriors. The hosts criticize the Warriors' strategy and player performances, notably highlighting Draymond Green's and Jimmy Butler's roles.
Dan Le Batard [05:09]:
"Jimmy Butler is one of three players ever to have high-end numbers in a playoff game—25 points, 5 rebounds, 5 assists, and 5 steals."
Stugotz [07:27]:
"Without Jimmy Butler, that team has no shot of winning an NBA title. Jimmy complements both Draymond and Steph in the way he plays his game."
The conversation underscores Jimmy Butler's impact on the Warriors' gameplay, emphasizing his ability to calm the team and provide a reliable scoring option alongside Steph Curry.
b. Critique of the Houston Rockets
The hosts critique the Houston Rockets' season, particularly their 21-point loss and the underperformance of key players like Van Vliet and Green.
The discussion highlights concerns about the Rockets' depth and the challenges they face against more seasoned teams.
c. MVP Discussions and Player Rankings
A segment is dedicated to the ongoing debates about the NBA MVP race, with particular attention to James Harden's comments supporting Shai Gilgeous-Alexander over Nikola Jokic.
This part of the episode touches on the subjective nature of player rankings and the influence of player opinions on public perception.
A humorous recount of a logistical disaster involving Jonathan Zaslow's bet is shared. The bet, which Zaslow won, involved securing concert tickets and working during the hockey playoffs. However, technical issues with Dan's Wi-Fi created unforeseen complications.
The hosts laugh over the chaos, including the mishandling of a $700 steak meant for presentation and the ensuing scramble to go live on air.
The core segment revolves around identifying "Top 5 Underrated Pains." The hosts initially grapple with the definition, clarifying that these are pains people don't often consider until they experience them.
Despite initial confusion, the hosts collaboratively refine the list to focus on pains that are unexpectedly severe when experienced:
Stepping on a Lego:
Toothache:
Stubbing a Toe:
Funny Bone (Ulnar Nerve Pain):
Paper Cut:
Notable Quotes:
Dan Le Batard [25:19]:
"Underrated pain means that it is a pain that is good."
(Timestamp: 25:19)
Stugotz [25:26]:
"No, it's bad. It's a pain you don't think about until you're dealing with it."
(Timestamp: 25:26)
The discussion emphasizes how certain pains are underestimated because they are rarely considered until they occur, highlighting the hosts' ability to blend humor with genuine insights.
Dan narrates challenges faced during the live broadcast due to unreliable Wi-Fi, adding a layer of relatability and humor.
This segment underscores the unpredictability of live shows and the hosts' ability to maintain their composure amidst technical glitches.
Throughout the episode, the hosts engage in playful banter, teasing each other about personal anecdotes and mishaps. They also encourage listener interaction through polls and questions.
This interactive approach fosters a sense of community among listeners, making the conversation more engaging and inclusive.
The episode wraps up with reflections on the discussions, emphasizing the importance of recognizing and acknowledging lesser-known pains. The hosts' blend of humor, sports analysis, and personal stories creates a dynamic and entertaining listening experience.
Key Takeaways:
Jimmy Butler's Impact: Butler's role in calming and complementing the Warriors showcases the importance of leadership and adaptability in high-stakes games.
Houston Rockets' Challenges: The Rockets face significant hurdles due to underperforming key players, raising questions about their playoff viability.
Underrated Pains Awareness: Recognizing unexpected pains like toothaches and paper cuts can lead to a deeper understanding of everyday discomforts.
Technical Resilience: Overcoming live broadcast challenges highlights the resilience and quick-thinking nature of the hosts.
Community Engagement: Encouraging listener interaction strengthens the show's connection with its audience.
Notable Quotes:
Dan Le Batard [05:09]:
"Jimmy Butler is one of three players ever to have high-end numbers in a playoff game—25 points, 5 rebounds, 5 assists, and 5 steals."
Stugotz [07:27]:
"Without Jimmy Butler, that team has no shot of winning an NBA title."
Jonathan Zaslow [14:47]:
"Players in today's NBA constantly complain about the analysis. James Harden wants Shai to win, but we've all discussed that Jokic is the best player in the world."
Stugotz [25:05]:
"These are pains that people don't talk about enough. You don't think about a toothache until you have one."
This episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz masterfully combines sports critique, personal storytelling, and humorous discussions, offering listeners a comprehensive and entertaining experience. Whether debating the intricacies of playoff strategies or sharing laughs over underrated pains, the hosts maintain a captivating and relatable dialogue throughout.