The Big Suey: Are We Human Or Are We Samson? (feat. David Samson)

Summary

The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

Episode Title: The Big Suey: Are We Human Or Are We Samson? (feat. David Samson)
Release Date: December 5, 2024

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Introduction

In this riveting episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz, hosts Dan Le Batard and Stugotz delve deep into a contentious debate surrounding the originality of the "Golden at Bat" concept. The episode is further enriched by the presence of David Samson, whose interactions spark intense discussions not only about sports innovations but also about the human aspects of communication and empathy within the show's dynamic.

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The Golden at Bat Controversy

The core of the episode centers around a heated dispute over the inception of the "Golden at Bat" idea—a proposed rule change in baseball aimed at enhancing the game's excitement and appeal.

• David Samson's Accusations ([07:05] - [07:22]):
  David Samson boldly accuses Rob Manfred, Major League Baseball's commissioner, of appropriating the "Golden at Bat" concept. He claims, “Rob Manfred has stolen a perfectly good idea intellectual property of our favorite” and emphasizes the lack of acknowledgment for Stugotz’s original proposal.

• Stugotz's Defense ([10:32] - [11:27]):
  Stugotz vehemently defends his position, stating, “We were talking about this in an owners meeting committee well before 2014.” He further criticizes Dan Le Batard for attempting to distance himself from the idea, asserting that the concept was initially discussed in closed-door meetings among baseball’s elite.

• Dan Le Batard's Clarifications ([07:11] - [09:56]):
  Dan introduces the concept by differentiating between his idea, the "Magic at Bat," and the alleged "Golden at Bat." He explains, “Each manager has, like, four or five Magic at bats in his back pocket,” suggesting a strategic element aimed at diversifying gameplay. Dan also highlights the potential for adding theatrics, such as “throw out the smoke bomb,” to engage younger audiences.

• Notable Quote:
  David Samson ([07:05] - [07:22]): “Rob Manfred has stolen a perfectly good idea intellectual property of our favorite.”

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Interpersonal Dynamics and Human vs. Robot Debate

Beyond the primary debate, the episode explores the interpersonal relationships and communication styles of the show's members, particularly focusing on David Samson's demeanor.

• David's Emotional Detachment ([16:41] - [20:52]):
  Throughout the episode, David exhibits a robotic and unemotional approach to conversations, leading fellow hosts to question his humanity. Stugotz remarks, “Maybe it should have been me. I mean, this is why we're outraged as a show,” highlighting the tension caused by David’s detached responses.

• Emma Chamberlain's Provocations ([34:01] - [38:40]):
  Emma attempts to elicit an emotional response from David by showing him a sad video clip. David maintains a factual stance, repeatedly referring to situations as “logistics issues,” further fueling the debate about his capacity for empathy.

• Notable Quotes:

  • Stugotz ([18:26]): “Maybe he's not human.”
  • David Samson ([20:52]): “He sounds like a walkie talkie.”
  • Emma Chamberlain ([38:40]): “This is a logistics issue was the best answer he could have given there.”

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Environmental Concerns and Documentary Review

Shifting focus from sports to societal issues, the hosts review the documentary Buy Now the Shopping Conspiracy, which addresses the rampant consumerism and environmental waste exacerbated by companies like Amazon.

• Stugotz's Insights ([43:19] - [46:08]):
  Stugotz emphasizes the unsustainable nature of modern consumption, stating, “All of the waste that I'm contributing to is sickening.” He advocates for mindful purchasing habits and criticizes the inefficacy of recycling efforts.

• David Samson's Perspective ([40:46] - [46:08]):
  David echoes the environmental concerns, likening the current state to an “apocalyptic hellscape,” and underscores the urgent need to address the environmental degradation caused by excessive convenience and waste.

• Notable Quote:
  Stugotz ([43:19] - [46:08]): “We are people of consumption. And my takeaway from the movie... there is no interest at all to improve our lot in life, which is to ruin the earth with this waste.”

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Conclusion and Takeaways

The episode culminates without a definitive resolution to the "Golden at Bat" debate, leaving listeners to ponder the complexities of intellectual property and innovation within professional sports. Additionally, the exploration of human emotion and empathy within the show's dynamics offers a candid look into the personal interactions that shape the podcast's unique flavor.

• Final Thoughts ([47:23] - [49:34]):
  The hosts remain divided, with Stugotz maintaining his stance on the originality of the "Golden at Bat" concept, while David Samson continues to critique the management and business strategies within baseball. The environmental segment underscores the broader societal impacts of consumerism, aligning sports discussions with pressing global issues.

• Notable Quote:
  David Samson ([49:34]): “Join us to start your journey to a healthier and happier you.”

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Key Takeaways

• Intellectual Property in Sports: The debate highlights the importance of recognizing and crediting original ideas within professional settings.
• Human Element in Communication: The episode underscores the challenges of maintaining empathy and genuine interaction in a high-paced, opinion-driven environment.
• Environmental Responsibility: A significant segment of the show emphasizes the urgent need to adopt sustainable consumption habits to mitigate environmental degradation.

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This episode of The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz offers a multifaceted exploration of sports innovation, personal dynamics, and environmental responsibility, making it a compelling listen for enthusiasts seeking depth and engagement beyond typical sports commentary.

Transcript

[Emma Chamberlain]

You're listening to DraftKings Network. Hey, it's Emma Chamberlain. I designed these new glasses for Warby Parker and I basically can't take them off like I'm showering in them and sleeping in them. They're just that good. Go see them [e-mail] and you know what? Have a good day too. Okay? Alright, bye.

[Stugatz]

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[Dan Le Batard]

Welcome to the Big Sui presented by DraftKings.

[David Sampson]

Why are you listening to this show.

[Dan Le Batard]

The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan Lerd podcast? I'm sorry, I'm not gonna apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.

[David Sampson]

I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.

[Dan Le Batard]

I've done it. And now here's the marching man to nowhere, Fat face and the habitual liar.

[David Sampson]

It is rare, I would say that something that happens on this show startles me. Just, it just catches me totally off guard. And I will tell you that I have been just neglecting what is clearly a superstar talent in our building that I did not know was just hiding in the kitchen area and losing her wallet and getting, you know, doing basically war video photography that gets her pepper sprayed. And she just, she's a very eager and likable person, but I had no idea that she had the voice of an angel. And so Rose was pepper sprayed. And you guys stunned me yesterday when I realized Rose, who speaks in a very thick accent, loses that accent when singing.

[Stugatz]

There was no need for peppers.

[Emma Chamberlain]

Pray to be rained down on me Dies to stay oh, our time Left eye injury. Ohio State.

[David Sampson]

Such drama.

[Stugatz]

You lost.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's the deal.

[Stugatz]

The video clearly shows with my eye almost blinded. There's Harry and Lucy laughing.

[David Sampson]

Baby, I can tell you that I'm pissed at Rose with this brave. Oh, she sounded like a goose who stepped on with heels.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah.

[David Sampson]

Even though Rose was in Doom. Ms. Harry and Lucy laughing.

[Emma Chamberlain]

Even though I wasn't doomed.

[Stugatz]

There's Harry and Lucy. Laugh. How is it possible that the same person who produced that goose sound is the person who sounds like Shakira in this song?

[David Sampson]

It's impossible, Dan.

[Izzy]

I spent the majority of last night listening to this song on repeat with my wife. And I was like. Cause she knows Rose. She's obviously been to MMA hangouts and stuff. By the way, this weekend in Casatigi, 10pm on Saturday.

[Dan Le Batard]

But well done.

[Izzy]

Thank you. I was like, this voice is transcendent. This voice is superstar folk. She sounds like Jewel at Coachella live. She sounds incredible. And I'm like.

[David Sampson]

I'm telling you, I was moved by that song.

[Emma Chamberlain]

So was I. I want to make fun of Yeti for making sure that, like, he was in this, but.

[Tony]

Which he did.

[Emma Chamberlain]

Which he did. But his part is also really good. Like, Yeti hits those notes from the loins.

[David Sampson]

He was okay.

[Izzy]

He was all right. But, Dan, the pain that you hear.

[Jeremy]

Can we.

[Izzy]

Can we go to the. To the end?

[David Sampson]

Go.

[Izzy]

Let me go all the way to the end here where the music stops and she's just singing acapella. Listen to the pain in his voice, Dan.

[Emma Chamberlain]

Even though I wasn't doomed, there's Harry and Lucy La f. See, that's the thing.

[Dan Le Batard]

Goosebumps.

[David Sampson]

It's not just goosebumps. Are you kidding me? I was transported. I was transported to a field where football players were fighting and Rose is pepper spray. She's on the ground crying. And the pain of. There are my friends and they're pointing and laughing. The pain of that. I felt it. I felt it in her voice.

[Stugatz]

Gotta make a music video for this one.

[David Sampson]

This is a star in the making. Rose, you could catch her on the hockey show with Dork and Roy. And I believe that she is headed for.

[Jeremy]

What are you laughing about?

[David Sampson]

Izzy?

[Izzy]

What's that so funny about? Dork.

[Dan Le Batard]

Dork. I had the same reaction. It is, to be honest. You can catch her on the hockey show with dwork.

[David Sampson]

It is. I don't know. You're laughing at the guy's name. I don't know. You guys are laughing hysterically at the guy's name. I was just saying his name.

[Stugatz]

He gets it.

[Tony]

It's a funny name.

[David Sampson]

You know what? Izzy, you gotta. Izzy, you. You're gonna have to get out of here.

[Stugatz]

Why?

[Dan Le Batard]

What do you do?

[David Sampson]

You're doing too much.

[Dan Le Batard]

It wasn't a joke. It was just a name.

[David Sampson]

But I just said a name. And you derailed the show. Because I got to get to Samson. Let me get to Samson. David Sampson is here of nothing personal, and we've got serious business things to discuss with him. And also, we really do need the nation to understand that Rob Manfred has stolen an idea.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yes.

[David Sampson]

Now we have the sound here that Stu Gotz believes proves that we invented the idea of the golden at bat and that Rob Manfred stole it. But David Sampson is now claiming. Because we haven't gotten that off the ground yet. David Sampson claims that we are all roar and no reach. And if this happened to a show people were listening to this kind of thievery that you rejected. The commissioner rejected Stugatz's idea, laughing, and now he steals it without crediting Stugatz.

[Dan Le Batard]

The sound you're going to play for David and the audience is from August of 2014.

[David Sampson]

Right. But Sampson is here to claim. Look, Sampson's got a different claim, and you were yelling at him yesterday on air. Yes, because Samson claims he invented the golden at bat.

[Dan Le Batard]

Hmm. Well, mine's the magic at bat. But anyway, let's play the sound first for David so he can hear it. This is August 2014, where I pitched the idea to Rob Manfred.

[Tony]

No, this is our show. 2014.

[David Sampson]

Just.

[Dan Le Batard]

We.

[David Sampson]

We.

[Tony]

This was the first time we talked about it, and then we pitched it to him a couple years ago.

[David Sampson]

We went over this while you were in interviewing the Syracuse quarterback.

[Dan Le Batard]

He was great, by the way. He was so good. Mike's going to be so funny.

[David Sampson]

I don't know why you decided to waddle in here and throw the video when you haven't listened to anything we're doing. I don't know why you would do that.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's a fair point, Dan. What I was saying, what Mike and Mike Ryan and I were discussing, is I think one of the problems with baseball, Dan, and no one's really talking about it, is everyone sitting here trying to fix something that I think is probably. Probably unfixable, but everyone's trying to fix it. The real problem with baseball is when you go to a basketball game, you go to a Cavs game, you're going to see LeBron James for 90% of the game, and he's going to give you 27, 8 and 8, and you're probably going to see a dunk or a pass that you've never seen before, and you'll leave happy when you Go to a baseball game and an Anaheim angel game, you're going to see Mike Trout. Every third inning, he has a better chance of going over four than he does going 4 for 4 with a home run and four RBIs. And you're going to see Howie Kendrick just as much as you're going to see Mike Trout. I go to a Cavs game, I'm not going to see John Lucas III. I only going to see LeBron James. John Lucas III is a backup guard. I know you're having Mike jacket right now on the Cleveland Cavaliers. I'm not going to see him. I'm going to see LeBron. So what I'm trying to figure out, Mike and I are trying to figure out is I want to go in an angel game, and I want to see Mike trying every inning.

[David Sampson]

What are the Magic at bats? How are you doing the Magic at bat?

[Dan Le Batard]

Like, each manager has, like, four or five Magic at bats in his back pocket. All right, so let's say it's like second. Let's. Mike Trout gets out in the first inning, but in the second inning, it's second and third, and there's one out. He has the option in that spot of putting Mike Trout back in the game. You see Mike Trout two innings in a row. Genius.

[Jeremy]

That's his idea. And his idea allows for a certain amount of theatrics. Like, you could, like, throw like something like a smoke bomb or something Magic at bad time. Like you throw out the smoke bomb on the field.

[David Sampson]

Yeah, yeah, okay. A smoke bomb.

[Stugatz]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jeremy]

Just like a little firework, like a little cherry bomb.

[Stugatz]

Magic.

[David Sampson]

Time for a Magic at bat. Oh, Mike. So smokers on the field. Mike Scott throwing the smoke bomb. Time for a Magic at bat.

[Jeremy]

It's a lot cooler aesthetically than like a red challenge flag.

[Dan Le Batard]

And they're trying to appeal to a younger audience. Imagine how much a younger audience would love the smoke bomb. And then there's Mike Trout coming out, emerging from the smoke bomb.

[David Sampson]

A wise and smart television sports show that was immaculately, immaculately produced and spoken would have gone to the sound of Stugott's telling that directly to Manfred, and Manfred laughing it out of the room. But now you have your proof from 10 years years ago, Samson, that Stu Gotts invented the magic at bat. Why were you shaking your head no throughout that?

[Stugatz]

Because we were talking about this in an owners meeting committee well before 2014. So, Stu, where you came up with that is from a conversation that we must have had when I was on a competition committee. Talking about the possibility of this golden at bat. And then you purloined it, made it your own into a bestseller. And now I don't know if you're going to take distance or you're going to try to take the credit, but you certainly have your audience and fan base and Stu got sorry behind you. But it's just completely made up. You did not have the original idea.

[Dan Le Batard]

Where's your proof?

[Stugatz]

Inside baseball, right? That is everyone who's inside baseball would say when we talked about expanding to 32 teams, making eight divisions of four, maybe taking away the American League and National League, changing the rules, pitch clock, all of these things were discussed well over a decade ago. And it's just funny to me that you're trying to glom onto it. And it's even funnier that I should try to separate myself from it because it's being laughed at as a total mockery and you're running toward it. So maybe I should just give it to you, but I can't.

[Izzy]

You know what? Our proof is a closed door meeting that only the highest people of baseball actually get to attend. And no things ever leak from. There's no way that you would have ever heard something like that from it.

[Dan Le Batard]

It doesn't count until you speak it into a microphone.

[Izzy]

Exactly right.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's it.

[Stugatz]

I would not spoken by someone who speaks into a microphone.

[David Sampson]

I would not want Tony as my attorney. Oh, although, although now that I think about it, objection.

[Izzy]

You kidding me?

[David Sampson]

You know what? You know what, Tony? I might.

[Izzy]

It's about pomp and circumstance, Dan. That's what you don't get.

[David Sampson]

I think I would like Judge Tony and all of your general choose many. Yes, I would.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think I would be the judge executioner.

[Izzy]

What do you want me to be?

[David Sampson]

I. Here's. Here's the thing though, David. And this is where you lose your argument to Tony. You're a lawyer, you're great at debate. You are great at proving things. When he says to you after playing the wrong sound, here's my proof. And then he asks you where's your proof? And you say, inside baseball. You lose. Case dismissed. Yeah, like there is no proof from you there. None.

[Stugatz]

So I'm not debating this. I'm not actually trying to win anybody's voices, opinions or minds over. I'm merely trying to tell you what the facts are. But clearly you can interpret them as you will. You're using proof of 2014 sound, which by the way, the audience will clearly see the difference between 14 and 24. It's funny to me. But if you ask people, the Jason Stark article that started this entire thing two days ago in the Athletic Stu. Were you mentioned in the article as the originator of the golden at bat or was I?

[Dan Le Batard]

Maybe it was you. It should have been me. I mean, this is why we're outraged as a show.

[David Sampson]

Like, if we had genuine reach, people would take up this cause and understand that Rob Manfred has stolen a perfectly good idea intellectual property of our favorite.

[Dan Le Batard]

Court jester, one that he rejected when he was on the air with me. I mean, laughed at.

[David Sampson]

Laughed at.

[Stugatz]

That.

[David Sampson]

That sound should be. That sound should be being played by every sports show in America. The commissioner of baseball. What are you laughing about, David? The commissioner of baseball. The commissioner of baseball had an idea that everyone is already talking about and laughing about because it represents more change in a rule than the sport has ever known, maybe since the DH in terms of changing the numbers and absurdity. And this rule change was offered to him 10 years ago and stolen from Stugott in a week of great jokes where he's a bestseller with a book that he has neither read nor written.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's not fair.

[David Sampson]

I had to read for Stugotts best joke to be better than that one for Stugotts best. Did you know the weak Stugots is having a church didn't have enough pews for what it is that he was bringing tonight with Greg Cody dragging Greg Cody's lifeless enemy of fun corpse to the church to sell books. He made a better joke than that one. The commissioner of baseball is being laughed at for a terrible idea. A terrible idea that they do not yet know is a bad idea stolen from one of the great idiots in the history of sports media.

[Dan Le Batard]

Thank you. Great idea.

[Stugatz]

The interview that you are referring to, by the way, within the halls of baseball has been erased. There is nowhere that it's talked about. As a matter of fact, if you ask the commissioner, he would deny that he ever went on a show with you.

[Dan Le Batard]

He would. You're right about that. He would deny that.

[Izzy]

Bad News. It's evidence. A1.

[Stugatz]

Hey, Stu Gotz. I brought my son a copy of your book yesterday, right? And he opened it. It was a Hanukkah present. He opens it, he looks at the book and the first words out of his mouth. Wait. Student write this, did he?

[Dan Le Batard]

He knows me well.

[Stugatz]

Can you imagine?

[Dan Le Batard]

Congratulations to you for spending quality time with your son.

[Stugatz]

It was talking about you and then we went to a dinner where there were other people talking. So it was fine. But I will tell you that for him to have that reaction, he's going to share it with all of his friends in his apartment and in his area, because he wants to be the judge and jury about the quality of the writing. So I'm looking forward to giving you a report on that.

[David Sampson]

All right. So David does his own show within a show. He's been talking for a long time to himself. I showed Jeremy how that works one day and actually walked him into a room where David Sampson was alone with his thoughts for 50 minutes and put him in front of the television and just sort of said to Jeremy, you're not going to ever want to do this in your life. Talk to yourself for 50 minutes. Look at what it feels like. David Sampson within this show is talking so much now that he does his own show inside of the show and just drops in. I was at dinner with my son, and other people were talking, so it was fine. And you just throw it in there. And what are we supposed to do with that? If you're not going to explain, like, did you not want to talk to your son? Who are you trying to tell that? Like, what do you. Why is that detail in the middle of that story?

[Stugatz]

Because it informs how dinners go for me. I'm not able to. The irony is I get paid to talk, but when it comes to time with my kids, I am. My tongue is tied. I don't know what to talk about. And so I will engage like an old father would do with the stewardess, with the waitress, or with the host, or with other people in the restaurant in an effort to have some sort of discomfort alleviated by sitting in silence, which is my kryptonite. I can't deal with that. It sounds like David has to remind himself on occasion that he is a human being. So he looks around and says, oh, they are speaking. We can speak now.

[Dan Le Batard]

Now, I mean, just ask him how he's doing.

[Stugatz]

So I. I come with, like, a list of things. I put in my notes. I make a list of things that I want to cover or that I want to ask so I can foment conversation. And so I'll say, how are. How are classes? What are plans for graduation? What is going on with an apartment for post graduation?

[Dan Le Batard]

Do you check it?

[Stugatz]

Social life. So I love where your head's at. The problem is I need the reading glasses. So it turns out that I'm pressing buttons on my notes during the dinner and I'm erasing stuff that I need to get to. So I have to hit the un. Delete button. So what do I do? I excuse myself to pretend to use the restroom in order to recollect my thoughts that actually happened last night. I kid you not. Maybe it was not human.

[David Sampson]

What did you say, Iz?

[Stugatz]

I said maybe he's not human. No, I am. I want to be better, Izzy, but I just can't think of anything to.

[David Sampson]

Talk about if he can do a song. I am. I want to be a human. And that cry that you just heard, But I am just insisting from the bottom of well, of empty loneliness where he lives. But I am a human. I talk about billion dollar deals every day all the way to the grave. It's nothing personal. Not my family, not Thanksgiving. Nothing is personal. It's just all business.

[Dan Le Batard]

He used my book as a conversation starter with his son.

[David Sampson]

Hide in the work. Just hide deep in the work. Hide deep in the work. David. Talk to yourself. Do a show within a show. Go deep into your narcissism so you could die alone.

[Stugatz]

This is even better. I'm sorry, but I had my pile of Hanukkah gifts ready to go, and I have a stack of Stu's books that I have because I bought Support Him. And as I'm leaving to get on the train to schlep for the dinner, I was like, wait a minute. This is perfect. I get on my phone, I add, discuss Stu Gods book. And I put the book unwrapped in. In the other presents. Is this one of your better or worse Chanukah gifts? Because I think it's a horrible gift. No offense to. Oh, I think it was perfect. It was like four and a half minutes of conversation. It way out kicked its coverage.

[David Sampson]

Timed it. Do you ever timed the conversation?

[Tony]

Do you ever use coca to, like, you know, produce your dinners with your son? Like Coco?

[Dan Le Batard]

What?

[Tony]

Can I talk. Give me some questions.

[Stugatz]

No, I just do rundowns.

[David Sampson]

No. No, that can't be true.

[Dan Le Batard]

No, David, you don't do that. No, David, come on.

[David Sampson]

David. David, stop.

[Stugatz]

Can we stop?

[David Sampson]

No. No, we can.

[Stugatz]

This live. Is this live?

[Tony]

No.

[Stugatz]

Okay, yes. Then we can keep going.

[Dan Le Batard]

David, I want to see a rundown.

[David Sampson]

What's a rundown?

[Stugatz]

You have no idea how uncomfortable it is for me to spend alone time with anybody, like any of my children or people in my family. So I need lists. So I do it. Whether it's dinner with my mother or whatever it is, I have a list.

[David Sampson]

Look at this. A palpable sadness is swept over the room as you laugh and.

[Stugatz]

I'm sorry.

[Tony]

No, I'm sorry.

[Dan Le Batard]

Be sorry to your family.

[David Sampson]

Do you believe your own plea that I am human? Do you have proof?

[Stugatz]

My heart is beating right now at 52 beats a minute. I feel good. I'm ready to go record a sporting class for Meadowlark. Everything's going fine. There's a ton of sports business things to talk about. There's serious things going on in the world. I was just trying to let you know what I did last night. Schlepping two hours on a train both ways for a dinner and I made it through. And one of the issues is we choose restaurants where the food comes quickly. Not fast food, but semi fast food. And in New Haven there's a ton of pizza places like that and so I'm able to really get through it perfectly and then get to the train Station early.

[Emma Chamberlain]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[Stugatz]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[Tony]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[Tony]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[Tony]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[Tony]

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[Dan Le Batard]

See D slash B Ball Don Lee.

[Stugatz]

Oh, I like firing people, so I take the opportunity to fire whenever I possibly can because I can use it as a learning experience for them and try to help them out and try to point out what they did wrong. But in this case, the employee was enough levels below where I was that I did not do the firing, but I had it done within moments of discovery.

[David Sampson]

I'm just like, firing people. It's just absurd. It's absurd, Stugach.

[Stugatz]

I'm talking about people who I fire, who deserve it, who have done something that actively requires me to fire them. It is my unadulterated pleasure to do so.

[Izzy]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stu Guards.

[David Sampson]

Can I get some help from the room, please? Because Izzy was very nice and soft about no offense, Stu, but that's a terrible Gift. And I wanted to hurl Izzy into the ocean. Ocean.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's a great gift, my man.

[David Sampson]

It's this holiday season. Stugottsbook.com There is no better gift. Like, it's one of the best jokes this show has ever told. Like, what do you mean it's a terrible gift? I really was surprised that Stugotts ate that from you.

[Emma Chamberlain]

I mean, how many gifts does your son get, David? Is that the only thing that you're giving him?

[Stugatz]

8. So it's actually 7 because one of them is a. Is a donation. But so seven gifts, but eight. Eight total gifts.

[Izzy]

A donation, like to the human Fund. Like, what do you mean? You're donating something to somebody else? You're giving my present to some other guy?

[Stugatz]

We do a charity as one of the gifts one of the nights.

[Dan Le Batard]

Weird.

[Emma Chamberlain]

I mean, it's reason for the season, Tony.

[Izzy]

Sure, yeah.

[David Sampson]

Weird.

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean, giving charity on someone's behalf. What if they don't want to give charity? What if they want the gift? I mean, from dad, you know?

[David Sampson]

You think it's weird to give charity as a gift?

[Dan Le Batard]

I think there's not a single kid out there that wants dad write a check to a charity as opposed to getting it.

[Emma Chamberlain]

I mean, in David's defense, it is a tax write off, so.

[Dan Le Batard]

Right.

[Tony]

Heavy Chanukah.

[Izzy]

You can make that like another thing you guys do, like give me my eight presents for Hanukkah. But also on this on the side, we can also do the charitable thing after, you know, I get all eight and we do something else.

[Emma Chamberlain]

You know, you're the non human now, Tony.

[Stugatz]

No, this is a very human thing that we do do, is that there is a. For charity. We make sure that the three kids get together each year to decide amongst themselves which charities they want to support. So ferments, closeness in the family. Except then I got uninvited to participate in it. So now the three kids do it.

[David Sampson]

Oh, Jesus.

[Stugatz]

On their own.

[David Sampson]

All right, wait a minute. What happened with Thanksgiving? How'd that go for you?

[Stugatz]

I took whoever had the over of 90 minutes wins. It was 118 minutes I was in and out. And apparently there was all sorts of things going on that I was not aware of. Why? Because I was able to do meadowlark work at my sister's house, which enabled me not to have to be at the table. And there were assigned seats where I was put in the perfect seat at the end where I could just leave and come back whenever I wanted. But I felt so guilty not interacting with people at the end of the table that I ended up moving in the middle of the dinner for about six minutes, and then I left. And it was pointed out to me the next day that I was the last one to arrive and the first one to leave, and people were wondering whether I was okay.

[Tony]

Do you make your plate first when you're in a group setting like that so you don't have to touch the utensils after people have touched it?

[Stugatz]

Another great point. It is a buffet. And my sister, as a gift to me each Thanksgiving or whenever I have dinner there, allows me to open the buffet every time. And I take some people. Family members are weird. They go up two, three, four times to the buffet. I just go once, take everything I'm going to eat for the dinner, sit down, and then I'm finished. And don't go back up two seconds.

[Tony]

I don't go back for a full second. But you go back to the side and cheese sides that you really love. Like the plates full the first time. Plate number two is usually about half the size. But just going back to the sides that you really want to go back to.

[Stugatz]

I'm a one and done, Cody. That's it. One and done. You have to know what you want, take it, estimate properly, and then not go back there. Because when you go back for seconds, everything's been ravaged. David, presumably these are people who know you and like or maybe even love you. It feels like they're putting you in an uncomfortable situation time after time. Do they just think about not inviting you next time? I mean, listen, things aren't going that well for me. So I think I understand now, Dan, why he does a show by himself.

[David Sampson]

Is because he is not human.

[Stugatz]

And if he had. If he doesn't talk for a good amount of time, he accidentally shuts out.

[Izzy]

But you can just not talk, David. You know that, right? Like at the. At the dinner table, like, you don't have to talk to anybody. You can just kind of sit there, do your thing, be on your phone. That's what half the people are doing anyway.

[Stugatz]

But you have to know that when I met. I'm at a place like that. So it's supposed to be family, but there's always ancillary family which is not related to me in any way. It's related to the people I'm related to. And they're given instructions, which I appreciate because I've gone through with a list of what I'm allowed to be. I don't want to be approached to talk about Things and there was a violator. This Thanksgiving, someone came up to me and said, I'm sorry to bother you, would you be willing to talk baseball with me for a few minutes? Where is Juan Soto going to sign? And luckily, luckily, my sister saw this approach, immediately stepped in and distracted me by saying, can you help with the kugel? So I did not have to engage with this stranger on this topic, which I had zero interest in discussing. So those are also accommodations that are made for me which I truly appreciate because I really don't want to engage in small talk with strangers.

[Tony]

It was my father in law hit me last night with hearing anything about Soto and it's like, what would I know? What would I know?

[David Sampson]

But hold on a second though. Okay, so we're all in the information business and David is an expert on both baseball and business. And it is funny to see this expertise on the sporting class and everywhere else when I'm going to play the sound again, because it's amazing. David Sampson, who is close personal friends with Ichiro, was so worried once upon a time about the salary skyrocketing in this sport of baseball that he got infuriated because. No, no, he got infuriated that Ichiro. What? What, David? That Ichiro signed $100 million deal. And this also must infuriate David. David Soto turned down 400 million from Washington. And I was like, how could he turn that down? Because now he's going to get between 600 and 700 million and the Dodgers are deferring $1 billion in payment in the sport. And what's going on in the business of the sport is a bit crazy. But let's play the sound for the audience of David Sampson many years ago talking about what AN APOCALYPSE the $100 million contract was going to be.

[Stugatz]

I am speechless by that contract. I'm hoping that that report is formatted because there's no chance that the top of the lineup, forget that, there's no chance anybody's worth that. And Ichiro, who's led his team to zero, nothing. I hope you're wrong, Ben. It's unbelievable. You know what? Everybody gets what they deserve. And I guess maybe that'll be more luxury tax money and more revenue sharing money they'll have to give. But signing, I'm sure it can't be true. There's no way they gave 20 million a year to Ichiro at his age for five years.

[Dan Le Batard]

There's no way it is true.

[David Sampson]

This isn't wrong.

[Stugatz]

It can't be, Dan. Literally, it'll take the sport down that contract. They're right back to the ridiculous contracts. It can't be.

[David Sampson]

Your sport's out of control.

[Stugatz]

Well, Signing Ichiro at 20 million a year for five years is a joke. It's inexcusable. It's complete mismanagement. It can't be true.

[Izzy]

It sounds like Dan was somewhere in a bunker in World War II, trying to relay a message to David, who was also in a subsequent bunker somewhere else on the front lines. And speaking to him by, like, you remember the army guys who used to have the little army figurines? You would have, like, the guy with the bazooka. You'd have, like, the guy with the gun. And then you have the one guy with, like, the radio pack communications kid.

[Dan Le Batard]

You're like, that guy sucks.

[David Sampson]

All right, but you're. So you're saying I sounded like a walkie talkie?

[Stugatz]

I was waiting for an over, because there's no chance.

[Tony]

Over.

[David Sampson]

I feel now like I'm in a ship at sea because there's no chance.

[Stugatz]

Chance.

[David Sampson]

I'm trying to get communications from David as I'm battered by the storm, and he hits me on the walkie talkie from his systems.

[Stugatz]

No chance anybody's worth that. Dan, I'm begging you to stop now. I'm literally begging you to stop. It's almost impossible for me to believe that this is what you're doing today. I can't compute it. The good news is I discussed this with Ichiro when he was part of our team with the Marlins for many years, because he heard that when it came out because of the roar and the reach of your show. Side note, I was in San Francisco in front of those. The creatures that rip the babies off the pier. Sea lions or seals, whichever they are.

[Tony]

Crazy way to say sea lion.

[Stugatz]

So I was in San Francisco with family, and I stepped away to do your show. And you're bringing this up now today of all day?

[David Sampson]

I'm sorry, David. Jessica was doing a better show than this one. In my. In my ear on some of what, David?

[Emma Chamberlain]

Wait, you said the things in San Francisco that ripped.

[Dan Le Batard]

Ripped the.

[Emma Chamberlain]

What was it? Ripped the babies from their parents. I said Democrats in Dan's ear. It was a little. Friends. David, I heard that today is national communicate with Your Kids Day, December 5th. How do you intend to celebrate with your children?

[Stugatz]

I don't.

[Emma Chamberlain]

I'm serious. I googled.

[Stugatz]

What am I supposed to do? You're not going to text them so I don't get a response.

[Tony]

Hey, 1.

[Stugatz]

Should I call them so it Goes to voicemail. What would be your suggestion for national communication with kids?

[Emma Chamberlain]

Did you read any of Stugatz's book? What did you think? Let's go with that.

[Tony]

I love you.

[David Sampson]

I want to stop you guys for just a second because Tony was also doing his own show in my ear, and he surprised me there with one of my favorite characters around here, which is the second conservative Zagi, who works in even tighter windows and hadn't been around here in a while. And the reason I appreciated that degree of difficulty that he. That he embarked upon is because Jeremy, at the beginning of this entire conversation, ran out of this room hair on fire and just shouted. I've got 14 minutes to create a song he is preparing right now in the other room, something that serenades David's family sadness. And he's trying to produce it in 15 minutes of time because he doesn't want to live a life where he becomes David Sampson talking to himself on a solo show. He wants to play the xylophone on heat sidelines while singing songs. He wants that to be how he covers sports.

[Emma Chamberlain]

We've been busy drinking champagne.

[David Sampson]

Oh, I am so here for her.

[Emma Chamberlain]

Him.

[David Sampson]

Don't. Don't mess with me on the pronouns.

[Izzy]

We don't do pronouns. Dan.

[Tony]

I can't believe Jeremy wants to follow Rose.

[Stugatz]

I mean, that is a dangerous.

[David Sampson]

Unbelievable. Well, good. Let's see here if he's going to take on these challenges. He's got six minutes now, like, he left in a total panic. And I've got plenty to talk to David about if you guys don't want to talk about his family anymore. But I could spend. I could spend the rest of the show in this particular nest. Like I. His weird idiosyncrasies at home. I can go through all of them and you guys will understand how he is at the bottom of a well shouting, I am. I am human. When you ask him if he's human.

[Emma Chamberlain]

I have a way to figure out if David is human or not. We have a very sad video clip that we wanted to talk about of something that happened yesterday, and I want to play it for David and get his honest reaction to it.

[Tony]

It's a B roll clip, so just talk over it.

[David Sampson]

So this is sister Jean, and she is at the game and she is, what now? 105 years old and she's in a wheelchair, and she has been a mascot for this team that is its most famous member. And they're walking right past her without shaking her hands, without touching her hand. She's got a Fist out for a pound. And nobody. Everyone's ignoring her.

[Izzy]

28 did. 28 gave a little bit of a dap. I think the guy in front of 28 also had his hand like he did.

[Tony]

I blame the guy in the sweater on the other side because he's getting all the attention. He's getting all the high fives.

[David Sampson]

I just.

[Tony]

It's that guy's fault. I don't believe this was done intentional. I can't believe they would do this to Sister Jean.

[Emma Chamberlain]

David, does this make you feel anything?

[Stugatz]

No. This is a logistics issue. Her wheelchair is on the wrong side of the line. Line. She needed to be stage right, not stage left. I don't know whether she can extend her right hand at her age, but if she can, you put the wheelchair on the other side, have the right hand out, and you got yourself a bunch of high fives.

[David Sampson]

This is.

[Stugatz]

And someone should have noticed that in between. Once four players pass her, you stop the train of players. You move the wheelchair across the aisle and then get the last group, please.

[David Sampson]

As fast as you can. Again, create for me the new hit television game show where you ask David questions, did you feel something there? And the answer is always, this is a logistics issue. Please, let's play that game. And that show where you can see proven at every turn that he's not human, that he's not in any. That you would look at that video, heartbreaking video of an old woman being snubbed at the end of her life by a team she dedicated her love and her religion to. She's the most famous member of that team. She carried them to heights no one had seen college basketball go before. They are ignoring her. You see a logistics issue.

[Stugatz]

I just want to solve the problem. That's what I do. I see a problem and I solve it. And this is a problem. I agree with you. Do I feel something? No. But what I feel is I can fix this and I can fix it quickly, and I would have fixed it at the time.

[Emma Chamberlain]

This is a logistics issue was the best answer he could have given there.

[David Sampson]

But what I'm saying to you is if you ask him questions, that will be his first sentence. 10 out of 10 times some form of that will come out of his mouth because he's not human. Like, this is a. This is a game show. We can absolutely play with him where we ask him these questions. But can you explain to me, please, David, the billion dollars in deferred payments? Like, I don't understand what's happening in the business of sports.

[Stugatz]

So Let me, let me actually go back. And you said that Soto is going to get 6 to 700 million. That's been widely reported. But it's all ignorant reporting because until you see the amount of deferred comp in the offer, you don't know how much money Soto's actually getting. So the example is Shohei Ohtani. People say he got $700 million over 10 years. That's not accurate. His contract is actually 700 million over 20 years. And when you present value it back in today's dollars, it's the equivalent of about 460 million over the 10 year contract. So he's not making 70 a year, he's making 46 a year. And the reason the Dodgers defer all this money is they take money they owe to players and they reinvest it elsewhere and they make money on that money and then they take the money they've made to pay the player in the future. It is a great game. The Mets played it with Bobby Bonilla. All of you know about this. I don't know where Stu is, but this is a, a real thing called Bobby Bonilla where he still gets a million and a half dollars 20 years after he played. Because what the Mets did is they took the money they would have paid to Bonilla, they gave it to Madoff and said, we're going to make 10% and we're going to pay Bonilla 1%. We just made ourselves 9%. So it's a business move that the Dodgers make both to make money on their players, but also to not have as much present day a outflow of cash. So if players are willing to accept it, which many are because it keeps them making money after they're done playing, it's a win. Win.

[David Sampson]

Jessica, you can't keep doing that show in my ear. You can't. You can't keep doing the show just in my ear as I'm going to David Sampson. It. No, it's a great.

[Emma Chamberlain]

We're shopping like a game.

[David Sampson]

It's a great, it is a great game show. But what you just asked in my ear is not something that I can ask him. Even though it would have been darkly fun, like it's a spicy word. It's much, it's much funnier. Much funnier in my ear than it would be on air, where I think it would get us all in trouble.

[Emma Chamberlain]

That's fair. That's why I was trying to do it while David was talking, so that you could say no.

[David Sampson]

Yes.

[Emma Chamberlain]

And then we can move on.

[Tony]

Let's play. Feelings or logistics? Kirk Herbstreet bringing his dog to college game day and his games. Feeling or logistics?

[Stugatz]

Outrageous. There's really no place for that.

[Tony]

That seems like a feeling.

[David Sampson]

This is a good game. It's a good game. You guys could hit him with an assortment of things and all he's going to do is land on business every time. Cold.

[Stugatz]

Not true. That's not true. You know what, Dan? Stop. Just stop. I. You want to play the game? I'll play the game. But don't paint me as something that I may or may not be based on things that you're going to make up just to try in an ear. Doing a show that I'm not privy to because it's not in my ear. The audience isn't privy to. And you're doing these private things. What is the benefit of that? Is that making the show better somehow? Not in my mind. I don't know what the hell you're talking about.

[David Sampson]

It feels like a feeling. And Jessica.

[Emma Chamberlain]

But it was a. It was a logistical issue.

[David Sampson]

Jessica was doing a very good show in my ear. I can tell you about it later. But you're right. It plays deep defense. She knows it plays defense against asking me a thing that would get us all in a lot of trouble. As you stop talking in the show reverts to me was just ask it.

[Stugatz]

And just ask it.

[Tony]

Demar Hamlin playing football after dying on the field last year. Feeling or logistics?

[Stugatz]

Do we want to do a private show in the year or do you want me to answer that question? Which one? Totally up to you.

[David Sampson]

You know what?

[Stugatz]

I'm happy. Happy to answer it. I'm very happy for Demar Hamlin. It was like a lightning bolt. It was incredibly unlucky what happened with that hit. And he's. The odds are really good that it's not going to happen to him twice. So of course I was happy. I don't know if happy is the correct emotion there. Wait. The arbiter of emotions.

[David Sampson]

Wow.

[Stugatz]

Not a pleasant segment or whatever it is that this is. There's an emotion.

[David Sampson]

Nothing.

[Stugatz]

Why don't you go ahead and tell me what was in the here. Because I think the audience would be interested in the show within the show.

[David Sampson]

You know what, David, you're to. You are totally right here. But what I'm saying is that if I do what Jessica suggests that I do right now, not with the music we're not doing, it would be. It would be dark, deeply and darkly funny and also wildly not appropriate right now. It's the thing that Izzy wanted to come in and talk about today. And as he started talking about it, I'm like, that's what I usually do to the show. I start with stuff that's that serious.

[Emma Chamberlain]

Is there a movie that you're reviewing for us this week, David?

[Stugatz]

Thank you, Jessica. There is. And this is actually an important movie for all of us to watch. It's called Buy now the Shopping Conspiracy. It's a movie on Netflix. It's a documentary. It's not. It's maybe an hour and 13 minutes. It is about Amazon, among other companies, and the waste on our planet from all of the consumption that we do where the manufacturers of our items like our phones or our clothes, there's no quote, end of life plan for these items. And forget the BS of recycling and all that nonsense which doesn't actually work. The reality is that we don't know what to do with everything we're wasting. And these companies. And I am so guilty of this because I'm a TikTok Instagram Facebook shopper, constantly one click at my door the next day that all of the waste that I'm contributing to is sickening. And so here's the suggestion in the movie, if you want something, put it in a cart and let it sit for 30 days. And if you still want it, then buy it. But as a company, we don't allow that. Because if you go to lebatard af.com or davidsampsonpodcast.com and you put a piece of merch in the cart, we're going to send you an email every day, twice a day, sometimes saying, oh, did you forget about your cart? Because we want you to buy what's in the cart. So there's no interest at all to improve our lot in life, which is to ruin the earth with this waste. Because we are people of consumption. And my takeaway from the movie, folks, spoiler alert. There's a few people out there trying to help, but it is putting a finger in the dam of waste.

[David Sampson]

I believe that we are in the apocalyptic hellscape portion of we get so much convenience sent to our house with jet fuel and in boxes that we're throwing away, that we're ruining the environment faster than it's ever been ruined so that we can all die together one day. Poor before rich. Gonna make sure that Elon Musk lives in space somewhere with all of our.

[Emma Chamberlain]

I know this, Dan. This sounds like a logistical issue to me. It does need something to do with all our.

[David Sampson]

You're so right. Let's see what Jeremy produced here in a panic as fast as he could about the hollow, sad emptiness that is David Sampson. Being a robot, I did my best to prepare. When I saw my son last night, I prepared a list of questions in my notes app, not my mind. And sometimes I get nervous when I have to speak to him. So I brought to my son Stu Gotz's book, Are We Human? Are we singing Samson? We cannot talk to our own families and I'm writing rundowns so I can prepare. Are we human or are we Samson?

[Stugatz]

Good.

[David Sampson]

Good job, Gary.

[Emma Chamberlain]

Good.

[Izzy]

But not better than Rose, though.

[Tony]

No, never better than I wouldn't even try to follow. Just a separate situation.

[David Sampson]

Nothing Personal is the name of the podcast. Thank you, David.

[Stugatz]

Thank you.

[Jeremy]

Howdy folks. It's Mike making this podcast. Time. Miller Time. That's right. Miller Lite makes all the great times even better. Why? Dependability for one great taste. Less filling. You know exactly what you get. Everybody's going to be happy because they're going to be drinking on a beer that tastes like beer. Can you imagine it? A taste that you know that you can depend on. No games, no gimmicks. Just great beer for people who like beer. And that is immense. Come this holiday season, say you're hosting or you're going over to a holiday party. What do you bring with you? 12 pack of them Miller Lites. Beautiful color, wonderful white cans, this incredible flavor that you know only Miller Lite can deliver you. And at just 96 calories and 3.2 grams of carbs per 12 ounces, miller time is always a good time. Making memories at your year end gatherings. Tastes like Miller time. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tastes like Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces. Fewer calories and carbs than premium regular beer.

[Dan Le Batard]

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[David Sampson]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[David Sampson]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[David Sampson]

Visit mindfultherapygroup.com or call 562-mindful to get started today.