The Big Suey: Being Attacked In a Public Forum (feat. Dave Dameshek)

Summary

Podcast Summary

Podcast: The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
Episode: The Big Suey: Being Attacked In a Public Forum (feat. Dave Dameshek)
Date: December 5, 2025
Special Guest: Dave Dameshek

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Overview

Broadcast from the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, this Big Suey episode is classic Le Batard Show—witty, irreverent, deeply sports-nerdy, and full of rapid-fire tangents. With guest Dave Dameshek, the crew jumps between NFL hot takes, LeBron's legacy, sports history, and even the economics of tooth fairy payments. The banter is sharp, playful, and peppered with references ranging from 1980s sitcoms to Pittsburgh stadium nuances, offering both hard sports discussion and humorous asides.

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Key Discussion Points

1. Mark Andrews’ Surprising Age & Ravens’ Offensive History

Timestamps: 02:13–03:45

• Stugotz is shocked that Ravens TE Mark Andrews is only 30. He says, “For some reason, he's... the career leader in Baltimore in yards, receptions, in touchdowns. It just seemed to me he was older than 30. But I think it was the Nacho Libre mustache.” (02:46)
• The crew teases him for inventing Andrews’s mustache due to Baltimore’s Flacco-era imagery (03:17).
• Dameshek arrives and highlights the Ravens’ long-standing struggle to develop star wide receivers, calling Andrews' franchise records "damning with faint praise".

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2. LeBron’s Longevity and “Beginning of the End” Debates

Timestamps: 03:52–08:39

• Dameshek gives context for LeBron’s iron-man streak: “Cooper Flagg had been alive for 15 days... The Big Bang Theory and Mad Men would debut later that year... Nick Saban was the Dolphins' coach.” (04:00–04:35)
• Roy marvels at public eagerness to tear down LeBron: “The ongoing desire to take shots at LeBron... I don't understand.” (07:21)
• The group muses on how rare it is to successfully replace a legend in sports or pop culture and relates this to LeBron’s career arc post-Jordan/Kobe.

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3. Lamar Jackson, Playoff Narratives, and Adjusting Styles

Timestamps: 09:14–12:14

• Dameshek predicts a media pile-on if Lamar’s Ravens falter: “Who is going to get attacked in public forums...is one Lamar Jackson... one of the most dynamic, one of the great quarterbacks in the history of people in Lamar Jackson, but having to deal with, with the grim reality that he misses long stretches almost every year for him.” (10:00)
• He likens Lamar’s crossroads to MJ and Kobe transitioning styles: “Both right in the middle of their careers decide like, oh, I'm not as dynamic anymore... and so they did. What's Lamar's adjustment going forward now?” (11:22)
• The classic "greatest ability is availability" cliche is applied to Lamar.

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4. Atmosphere Disappointment: Pitt Football’s Stadium Energy

Timestamps: 12:14–15:00

• Mike Ryan laments a dead atmosphere at a Pittsburgh Panthers game, calling it “the worst environment for football” he’s encountered (12:40).
• Dameshek and others discuss campus stadiums vs. NFL venues, touching on why Pitt and even UCLA lose student and city spirit by playing off-campus.

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5. The Ever-Evolving College Football Playoff & Bama’s "Privilege"

Timestamps: 18:42–21:12

• Dameshek criticizes the subjective, “gilded class”-favoring nature of new CFP formats: “It still has come back to this weird bespoke, sort of gilded class encouraged sort of conversation around like, yeah, but you know, they're better. That's, that's what everything comes out. ‘Yeah, but you know, Bama’.” (19:22)
• Dan and the crew agree that Alabama is getting a pass not given to other teams with similar records/performance.

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6. Quarterbacks’ “Super Bowl Window” & NFL Playoff Outlooks

Timestamps: 21:18–23:59

• Dameshek: “The sweet spot for winning the Super Bowl is guys between their second and sixth seasons... in the last 25 Super Bowls... 14 times by a quarterback in his second to sixth season.” (22:00)
• He argues current up-and-comer teams should be considered real contenders based on this trend, not just brands like Brady’s Pats or Mahomes’ Chiefs.

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7. Thursday Night Football, Officiating, and The Mystery of “Safety”

Timestamps: 23:59–26:44

• Debate over a controversial non-safety in last night’s NFL game. Dan: “That's like the most obvious example ever of it being a safety.” (24:28)
• Roy riffs, “What's safe about a 300 pound man landing on you in the end zone? It’s the opposite of safe.” (25:38)
• The crew questions why the same word is used for a defensive position and a scoring play.

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8. “Gold Jacket or Lombardi?”: The Ultimate Player Honor

Timestamps: 27:08–28:03

• Dameshek reports, “Super bowl champion players would all choose the gold jacket. They would all choose gold jacket.” (27:32)
• Only Cam Newton and Antonio Brown have told him honestly they’d rather have the Hall of Fame legacy than a Super Bowl ring.

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9. NFL Rules, Tush Push, and Football’s Ten Minutes of Action

Timestamps: 34:05–37:43

• Dan proposes abolishing the quarterback sneak: “If you’re only going to give me 11 minutes of action, I don’t want any of it to be tush push... It’s not a real play. It’s nonsense. It’s boring.” (35:16)
• Dameshek suggests, tongue-in-cheek, restoring goalposts to the goal line to bring back wild, old-school football obstacles (36:14).
• Discussion of Canadian football and why goalposts were moved for safety (37:01).

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10. Tooth Fairy Economics and Parenting Anxieties

Timestamps: 41:22–46:56

• An extended, relatable segment on “how much should the Tooth Fairy pay?”
• Dan: “My going rate was $20.” (42:51)
• Roy: “$5 first tooth and a dollar the rest of the way.” (43:36)
• Multiple comic spins: staged stealth missions to retrieve teeth, the perils of inflation, and “being Indiana Jones” for a night.
• Notable exchange:
  • Stugotz: "The tooth fairy evidently has a budget problem." (43:20)
  • Dan: "She will learn." (43:20)
• Brief stories of not getting caught and the magic/embarrassment of belated child tooth losses.

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11. Running Gags & Inside Jokes

• Garlic breath:
  • Dameshek is repeatedly teased about alleged garlic roll consumption:
    • “‘Your breath smelled like a garlic factory.’” (39:10)
• Rooting for Mussolini:
  • Dameshek presents the morality of rooting for Steelers vs. Ravens in grandiose terms:
    • “Go ahead and root for Baltimore and root for Mussolini while you're at it because you're anti-freedom. Goodbye Steelers.” (29:13)
• Marching Man to Nowhere Fat Face and Habitual Liar:
  • Custom, deliberately silly nicknames—typical of Le Batard Show's inside humor. (02:03)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On LeBron’s longevity:
  • Dameshek: “Cooper Flagg had been alive for 15 days [the last time LeBron scored under 10 points].” (04:00)
• On Lamar Jackson:
  • Dameshek: “The greatest ability is availability, but it seems to be proving true.” (11:51)
• On Pitt football:
  • Mike Ryan: “I have never been in a worse environment for football than Pittsburgh. It was so sad. It was pathetic.” (12:53)
• On the Tooth Fairy:
  • Stugotz: “The tooth fairy evidently has a budget problem.” (43:20)
• On Steelers-Ravens rivalry:
  • Dameshek: “The Steelers are named after the mid-century heroes who forged the steel that built the tanks and ships used to defeat the Nazi scourge... [The] Ravens are named after a poem written by a Boston native who married his 13-year-old cousin, moved to Baltimore, got drunk and died. Go ahead and root for Baltimore and root for Mussolini while you’re at it.” (29:13)

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Segment Highlights with Timestamps

| Segment | Timestamp | |-----------------------------------|---------------| | Mark Andrews and Mustache Debate | 02:13–03:45 | | LeBron’s Historic Streak | 03:52–08:39 | | Lamar Jackson Playoff Pressure | 09:14–12:14 | | Pitt Panthers Stadium Atmosphere | 12:14–15:00 | | College Football Playoff Rant | 18:42–21:12 | | Super Bowl Window for QBs | 21:18–23:59 | | Thursday Night Officiating & Safety| 23:59–26:44 | | Gold Jacket vs. Lombardi Debate | 27:08–28:03 | | Tush Push Critique & Goalposts | 34:05–37:43 | | Tooth Fairy Parenting Stories | 41:22–46:56 |

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Tone & Style

The show’s signature mix of punchy sports debate, absurdist banter, and nostalgic trivia shines throughout, with Dameshek a natural fit for both substantive football discussion and offbeat humor. The camaraderie leads to frequent playful insults, extended riffs (like the garlic breath saga), and comedic exaggeration of trivial sports and parenting dilemmas.

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For New Listeners

If you enjoy lively, freewheeling sports commentary where no topic is too silly or heartfelt, this episode delivers. From dissecting the exact moment NFL goalposts moved, to whether the Ravens make you a fascist, to the $20 tooth fairy conundrum, you get both deep-dive sports history and daily-life relatability—all wrapped in the uniquely chaotic Le Batard Show package.

Transcript

[Dan LeBatard]

Now's a good time to remember where Tequila's story truly began. In 1795, Cuervo invented tequila.

[Stugotz]

Cuervo.

[Dan LeBatard]

What are you doing here?

[Stugotz]

Cuervo? Anytime someone says Cuervo, I show up.

[Dan LeBatard]

Well, I do know that to be true. But even during ad reads like Cuervo, I think he could lay out especially for one of our great partners.

[Stugotz]

Sweet, delicious Cuervo.

[Dan LeBatard]

Since then, Cuervo has stayed true to its roots. The same family, the same land, the same passion.

[Stugotz]

Cuervo.

[Dan LeBatard]

So enjoy the tequila that started it all. Cuervo. Cuervo the tequila that invented tequila. Proximo Cuervo.com Please drink responsibly Cuervo this.

[Roy]

Episode is brought to you by State Farm. Listening to this podcast Smart move Being financially savvy. Smart move. Another smart move having State Farm help you create a competitive price when you choose to bundle home and auto bundling. Just another way to save with a personal price plan like a good neighbor, State Farm is there prices based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.

[Dave]

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[Stugotz]

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[Dave]

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[Stugotz]

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[Dave]

Newer models may be shown.

[Stugotz]

Visit jdpower.com awards for more details.

[Dave]

Chevrolet together, let's drive.

[Stugotz]

Welcome to the Big Sui presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show?

[Dave]

The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast?

[Roy]

I'm sorry. I'm not going to apologize for that.

[Stugotz]

In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.

[Roy]

I've done it.

[Dave]

And now here's the Marching man to.

[Stugotz]

Nowhere Fat Face and the Habitual Liar.

[Dave]

This episode of the Dan Lebatard show is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings. The Crown is yours.

[Stugotz]

I was very happy to see that the Ravens extended the immortal Mark Andrews a few days ago 3 year contract. I was legitimately shocked when I read his age Though you guys want to take just a guess? Maybe you guys won't be shocked by this at how old Mark Andrews is, because it seemed to me that he would be a lot older than he actually is.

[Dan LeBatard]

Is he 29?

[Stugotz]

No, he's 30 years old. But I just thought he was Kelsey's age and Ertz's age and Gronkowski age. For some reason, he's. He's the career leader in Baltimore in yards, in receptions, in touchdowns. It just seemed to me that he was older than 30. But I think it was the nacho Libre mustache. I think the mustache.

[Dan LeBatard]

You always attributed a mustache to Mark Andrews. That never existed. It's a weird. He never. He always had the full scruff. Yeah. Since playing college with Baker.

[Stugotz]

You guys are telling me I did this.

[Dan LeBatard]

We've done this show.

[Stugotz]

No, no, I didn't do this show. We did the Simone Fontechio show where you guys said he didn't have a mustache. And I am just seeing magical mustaches everywhere. Maybe one brief November, there was a time where I saw a mustache.

[Mike Ryan]

No, I know. You're doing. You're thinking Baltimore. You're thinking white guy. You're thinking Joe Flacco, Fu Manchu, and then attributing that to Mark Andrews.

[Stugotz]

Thanks.

[Mike Ryan]

It happens.

[Roy]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

Thanks.

[Stugotz]

Damascus is with us now. Football America is on Monday and Fridays, and I keep telling you that it is an excellent show. You will find yourself informed and entertained. But before we get to that zazzle, can you just give me some things that were so about the earth the last time that LeBron James scored fewer than double digits in a basketball game in 2007?

[Dave]

I can do that, Dan. How about when this streak first started? Cooper Flagg had been alive for 15 days.

How about.

How about the popular shows on television, Dan? The Big Bang Theory and Mad Men would debut later that year. Before Mad Men.

[Stugotz]

So it wasn't even on television?

[Dave]

Wasn't even on television yet.

[Roy]

How about.

[Dave]

How about Calvin Johnson, Adrian Peterson, Joe Thomas, Marshawn Lynch. They were drafted three months later.

[Stugotz]

Nick Saban was with the Dolphins.

[Dave]

That's right. Nick Saban was the Dolphins head coach. Do you want to guess who his quarterback was the week before LeBron streak started?

[Dan LeBatard]

Cleo Lemon. Cleo Lemon. Nice guess.

[Dave]

That's right.

[Dan LeBatard]

I know.

[Stugotz]

Ball.

[Dave]

Jeremy, do you want to know how much music Adele had made at that point?

[Stugotz]

None.

[Roy]

None. You guys are not playing this game, right?

[Dan LeBatard]

What do you mean?

[Roy]

You're doing great.

[Stugotz]

There was no iPhone, no Instagram.

[Dave]

There was no iPhone. There was not good.

[Dan LeBatard]

Damn. How about you guys are locked in.

[Dave]

How about a black president? What that would never happen was a pipe dream.

[Stugotz]

Damascy is with us now. Football America, please check it out because as I said, it is something far different than what you will normally find around your football. Damascus is with us. And among the games this weekend, Colts, Jags, Bears, Packers, Texans, Chiefs, Steelers, Ravens. Those are a couple of 500 teams. There's a four or five hundred teams at the end there, but they're still big games. The biggest of them is what? Damoshek?

[Roy]

Well, the greatest rivalry of the 21st century in pro football is Raven. Steelers. That's. That's dodging your question a little bit. Bears, packers is real juicy. That's the greatest rivalry of the 20th century. And they've never really lined up in this millennium. I guess there have been a couple of moments. The Jay Cutler hurts his knee and Caleb Haney almost takes the Bears to the super bowl. And except that BJ Raji picks, sixes him and runs it in. If not for that play, we would might. We may still be talking about a Super bowl list. Aaron Rodgers, he may never have gotten to a Super bowl. Were it not for that and otherwise it would have been Caleb Haney starting for the Chicago Bears in the super bowl against the aforementioned Pittsburgh Steelers. I have so many things I want to talk about. My head swimming after listening to you guys for the last half hour or more. Now Mark Andrews, damning with faint praise when you say he's the all time leader in the Ravens pass catching departments. Who's the best receiver otherwise in Ravens history. It's very weird that they've never figured out the pass catching position over there. The diminishment of LeBron continues to fascinate me. I don't know. In a world of actual beginning of the end diminishment. I agree, I agree it is the beginning of the end. But like Dan just said, he's an old man. I mean, how long do you want him to be good for? I mean, sweet Jesus.

[Stugotz]

I mean, you could argue it's beginning and the end of his life as well. He's old.

[Roy]

What are you doing? He's old.

[Stugotz]

He's an old person.

[Roy]

Yes, it's remarkable what he has done. I don't understand.

The ongoing desire to take shots at LeBron who came into what is not just in sports, but one of the hardest things that's always held up in life to do, which is replace a legendary I. The list is very short. Danny White did it successfully but but came up just A tick short in the early 80s in replacing Roger Staubach, he almost got to three straight Super Bowls. He didn't and isn't a Hall of Famer and has forgotten about. And then, I guess after Mr. Roper and Mrs. Roper moved away from the apartment building, Mr. Furley did a keen job of filling in there with the trio who lived overhead. But, I mean, that's. I think that's the extent of the.

[Dan LeBatard]

Well.

[Roy]

Oh, I have one more for you, Royal. Like this Mario Lemieux coming into the league when Wayne Gretzky was the greatest of all time and outshining the greatest of all time as soon as he got there. By the way, Roy, I hope you're watching the. The Lemieux child, kid. Crosby. LeBron may have the gout, but Crosby still in his prime. Look out for them Penguins, right?

[Dan LeBatard]

Crosby had the mumps. Remember that? Yeah, you had the mumps. I'm surprised LeBron hasn't had yet.

[Stugotz]

Roy, how do you feel about Danishek's hat? Right.

[Dan LeBatard]

He's doing it despite me, Dan.

[Stugotz]

He keeps wearing the Crosby's backhand hat, and he shouldn't do that to you. It feels disrespectful because it is. Okay, well, at least you're clear on that disrespect. Damascia. That's an excellent Mr. Roper and Danny White reference for all the 80 year olds listening to our show right now. If Lamar loses this game on, I'm assuming it's Sunday, although I shouldn't assume that. If he loses this game on Sunday, what does the conversation around Lamar become?

[Dave]

Throw him out the leave.

[Roy]

You understand that the notion is that there are two women living together in this apartment, and then they need a third roommate. So, so, so, so Jack Tripper comes on.

[Dan LeBatard]

I heard you get caught up in the air, you're distracted by them garlic rolls.

[Roy]

That's right.

[Stugotz]

That he's addicted to garlic rolls. He wanted to make. He wanted to make his threes. Company joke. And he was gonna stay in and he got distracted by.

[Roy]

How's your tick? How. How's your. How's your turkey, Dave? Like, oh, it'd be a lot better with some of them garlic rolls from.

[Stugotz]

Down in your breath so bad. Your breath smelled like.

[Roy]

That's not true. Why would. Come in. I don't wake up at this hour to be attacked by you in a public forum. Now, who is going to get attacked in public forums, not just in Charm City, but across football America is one Lamar Jackson. Because this is. If they. If they were to lose this game, I mean the division should be theirs. It is stunning that we continue to have the conversation about is, is it Josh Allen's year? Is it Lamar Jackson's year? They and their pal Patrick Mahomes may all miss the playoffs. This is, this is just the wackiest football season we've had. But you know, how much longer can you endure? Who is one of the most dynamic, one of the great quarterbacks in the history of people in Lamar Jackson, but having to deal with, with the grim reality that he misses long stretches almost every year for him. And if they don't get over the hump they this week against a Steelers team that is just obviously in tatters. It's the worst kept secret in the world that it feels like Mike Tomlin is in his final days there and everything is is aligning for these to be the last few games for him in Pittsburgh. But what if they go into Charm City and win that game? What's the conversation around Lamar Jackson? Does he need to make the guy who LeBron always gets compared to Michael Jordan midway through his career and then Kobe after him, both right in the middle of their careers decide like, oh, I'm not as dynamic anymore. I can't attack the rim. I have to become a mid range jumpsuit shooter in order to dominate the next decade. And so they did. What's Lamar's adjustment going forward now? Something has to change in his style of play because he keeps getting hurt every year. And it's weird because it's not like he's running away from guys. Ah, they got him. I hurt his knee. See, he can't be that dangerous running around like RG3 did. It's weird. It's a sort of wait, Lamar's hurt again kind of thing after the game, midweek kind of conversation, like, wait, what's wrong with him now? Because you don't even see on tape in the game, like, oh, that's the play. He got hurt. But the facts are facts. He keeps getting hurt and that's bad. I don't know if you've heard that cliche about the greatest ability is availability, but it seems to be proving true.

[Stugotz]

Mike, did Garlic breath give you good advice on what it is that you should experience in Pittsburgh when you went last week?

[Dan LeBatard]

He did. It was my first time ever in Pittsburgh and I love the city. I love how walkable it is. I got to hang around PNC park, which looks like a beautiful place. Yeah, the three Rivers converging. Everybody's super nice, but I Go for a swim. I cannot believe what a terrible football atmosphere that is for a nine time national champion in Pittsburgh. People want to give Miami shit for Hard Rock Stadium for like a noon start. I have never been in a worse environment for football than Pittsburgh. It was so sad. It was pathetic. You could hear winds howling. They were. They were. They were throwing up highlights of the 2017 Kenny Pickett game. Kenny Pickett's first start. You would think if they did that at Hard Rock. Everybody out of their chairs. Yeah. Amazing. Like one smattering of applause. I was flabbergasted. This is a program with rich tradition. Dave, you're a pit guy. You root on the Panthers. I did not know it was that shocking. It looks bad on tv, but it's even worse when you're in person.

[Roy]

What happened to you, Mike? I mean this. Are you swept up in this angsty character you've chosen to play this last fortnight? At least on behalf of the you and how you've been wronged or are in line to be wronged. Is that where this comes from? I wished you not. I offered you my own childhood bed to sleep in last weekend. And this is. This is your response is to attack my beloved homeland and the football, of course. I grew up going to Pitt Stadium on campus. That's where it's at. I don't understand where. Where the. The notion. Well, I do understand where it comes from that the idea, hey, we're sharing, we're playing in an NFL stadium. And this then should. Should pique the interest of 18 year olds. Like, oh, I'm in an NFL stadium. That means in four years, if things break right, I'll get to play in an NFL stadium. It holds no allure, I don't think, to the citizenry. I don't think it has much appeal to the 18 year olds either. The on campus stadium is where. It's at ucla, by the way, as I'm sure you've heard, is tracking to make the exact same mistake and go to SoFi. But they're already in the Rose bowl, which isn't all that close to ucla.

[Dan LeBatard]

But why is it so sad? Why is it so sad?

[Stugotz]

They're not that good.

[Roy]

They're in a. I mean, they were.

[Dan LeBatard]

Playing for a spot in the ACC championship game. They were ranked. They were ranked against a top 15 team. Like, what's the excuse?

[Roy]

That's not true. Oh, yeah, yeah, I like to see. I need Cristobal's little sound effect that, that he closes out interviews with Zaz.

[Tony]

With folks Listen up. You know my holiday pattern by now. Every single year, I tell myself, listen, Chris, you're going to be thoughtful. This. You're going to get good gifts. You're not going to be lazy. You're not just going to get gift cards. And this year, guys, I have news. I pulled it off. No panic, no sad little card. You know what I gave? I gave an aura frame. Like, why is it so hard to find a personal gift these days? It's for the people I'm closest to. My parents, my wife, my in laws, my kid. The most important people in my world. I have no idea what I'm supposed to get them as a gift. But one thing I know, people light up when they get photos. People love photos. So I loaded up my aura frame with all the moments I know they'll love. My daughter being adorable. Random selfies, group pictures where none of us are looking in the same direction. I kept adding them because aura lets you send unlimited photos and videos right from your phone anytime. And the best part, you can preload the thing before it even ships. So when it's open on Christmas morning, all the memories are already there. I'm telling you guys, this is a great gift. And folks, for a limited time, save on the perfect gift by visiting Oraframes.com to get $35 off or's best selling Carver mat frames named number one by Wirecutter by using promo code DLB. This deal is exclusive to listeners and frames sell out fast. So order yours now and get it in time for the holidays. Support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions apply.

[Dan LeBatard]

It's the holiday season. Fantasy football probably not going your way. Like most of America, your football team, hopefully you're still in the mix. If your college football team is in the mix, congratulations. You've made it this far. Why don't you toast your friends with some Miller Light at the holiday party? It is a surefire winter. It's a holiday season right now. So why don't you celebrate the 50th anniversary of my favorite beer, Miller Lite. Every time I crack open a Miller Lite, I look around at my friends and family and I think, yeah, this was a right call. It's a taste you know you can depend on. Brewed for flavor with simple ingredients like malted barley, rich balanced toffee notes, and that iconic golden color. And at 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces, it lets you enjoy the season without weighing you down. The best holiday beers are the ones you don't expect. Miller Lite Great Taste 96 calories Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Tis Miller Time celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

[Mike Ryan]

Holidays Fun Holidays As a dad, tough travel Gifts Matching Pajamas don't get me started on matching pajamas. It's hot and Miami. My wife says why don't you want to do this with us? My daughter's crying anyways. School parties, hosting a family. Next thing I know I basically put Christmas on my credit card and have no idea what I spent where if you want to keep your finances under control this holiday season, you need to be using Monarch, rated Wall Street Journal's Best Budgeting App. At 25, Monarch's the All in One Personal Finance Tool that brings your entire financial life together in one clean interface on your laptop or on your phone. Right now, just for our listeners, monarch is offering 50% off your first year.

[Roy]

A massive deal.

[Mike Ryan]

Monarch showed me how fast the holiday budget was disappearing flights, gifts, late night online shopping and helped me pump the brakes before the bill hit. Now my wife and I do quick money check ins, look at our holiday spending category and actually enjoy the holidays without starting January and the new year in panic. Don't let financial opportunity slip through the cracks. Use code [e-mail] in your browser for half off your first year. That's 50 off your first [e-mail] with code DAN and don't give me those matching pajamas.

[Stugotz]

I swear.

[Dave]

Don LeBatard can I tell you something? I don't know maybe like a month ago and I decided to watch Pitch Clock and I told Jeremy stugats this is a good show you're doing.

[Roy]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats.

I'm not here to answer questions for you about about a mid tier ACC team. Instead I want to redirect you Mike on this. Why is nobody talking about the among the gilded class in college football? Why is nobody taking shots at Bama right now? I get that the battles between the U and and Notre Dame right now and who deserves it more and all of that and I ultimately agree with you that the U has the head to head. So what are we talking about like we talked about Mike on football America last week. It is crazy that we had to get away from the argument, the poll based argument where all hash was settled On New Year's Day every year at five bowl games, the 10 best teams playing. When you put your head on the pillow at the end of the night at the as the Orange bowl and Sugar bowl wrapped up, you knew nine times out of ten you were pretty satisfied in understanding. We all collectively agreed like, yeah, that's the best team in the country. But we had to get away from that. That was no good. So then we had the two team, then the four team. Now we have the 12 team. We'll ultimately wind up with at least 16. And we've arrived in the exact same place, which is the conversation. Forget about the big fancy computer polls and the head to head results. It still has come back to this weird bespoke, sort of gilded class encouraged sort of conversation around like, yeah, but you know, they're better. That's, that's what everything comes out. Yeah, but you know, bam.

[Dan LeBatard]

So can you go, what are we talking about?

[Roy]

Well, that's not the results. The results are supposed to be everything. And the team you're not talking about is Alabama. If Georgia beats them, it more or less in my mind negates their victory over Georgia. And now they're a three loss team. Why are they just being kissed into this? Without question over the U in Notre Dame, they lost to Florida State. That's a way worse loss. That's a way worse loss than smu, who is a good team.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm with you. And they haven't had the benefit of playing well as a season like Notre Dame. They're playing their best ball. Miami, they're playing their best ball. We have not seen Alabama play an FPS team well in a month. And like I mentioned earlier on the show, it's a shame for Notre Dame fans when they do get shut out because they will be shut out that they haven't had a month long propaganda fight against the likes of Oklahoma and Alabama because they are better than those teams, as is Miami. And because it hasn't been framed that way. It's only been framed as Notre Dame and Miami. And ultimately Miami's got the win in hand. That sucks for them because Notre Dame can win a championship this year.

[Stugotz]

I don't know how this came a college football segment. Football America doesn't do much in the.

[Dan LeBatard]

Cut him off right when he was agreeing with me.

[Stugotz]

Yeah. And while you were agreeing with him. Yeah. It was really nice to hear.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm not, not a fan of today's show.

[Roy]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

You mentioned that you might be a fan of football America. Ryan Shazier, you Should check out the YouTube channel as a guest today. So is Von Miller the, the football, professional football. Denver, New England and Chicago. I don't believe that the people listening to this actually believe that those are going to be super bowl champions because they didn't believe it before the season. And so you've had 12 games to be played here and I think that people still don't believe it. Should.

[Roy]

They absolutely should. And of course everybody has to turn into curmudgeon being fed grapes and. And I'm gonna need to see it before I believe it. Well, believe this in this century and we can go back deeper in through the super bowl annals and I will point out to you the number of young quarterbacks who win their first Super bowl in their second year, in their fourth year, their fifth year. This is the sweet spot. Especially in the 21st century. We like to swoon and we, we like to bend the knee to, to Brady and Peyton and everybody else. And I get it. And then that has informed the same sort of reaction to Mahomes and like we talk about Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson, everybody else. But the sweet spot for winning the super bowl is guys between their second and six seasons. That's when in the last 25 Super Bowls the, they have been won by, I think they've been won 14 times by a quarterback in his second to six season. After that, in years seven to 12, it goes down to six Super bowl victories. The time to win is right now. That means Bo Nix, Drake May, Caleb Williams are in line to go to the Super Bowl. And by the way, when you get the one seed, I know this is obvious information, but when everything feels like a coin flip, when every game between two halfway decent teams feels like a coin flip, playing one less game is everything. So if you get the one seed, which is what it seems like Denver, New England's going to get, and if the Bears take care of business against Green Bay, they may get the one seed too. They should be the favorite based on the last 25 years, based on this millennium's history, it all points to those guys being the, the right teams to look at and circle. Even if you like to swoon over the bigger brand name guys who, like I said five minutes ago, some of whom aren't even going to be in the tournament this year.

[Stugotz]

I want to ask a handful of questions about last night's game since you guys were so ready earlier this week, based on the last three games to ignore the last 30 years of Jerry Jones's resume and declare that he Was indeed a good gm based on the last three games of fixing the defense. After the one game sample of last night, is he now a bad gm?

[Dan LeBatard]

Yes.

[Stugotz]

Okay, the next question is.

[Dave]

Feel like you were talking directly to me there.

[Stugotz]

Was that a safety last night? I thought that was a safety. I did not know the rules on.

[Dan LeBatard]

I hate that about this sport. And that's like the most obvious example ever of it being a safety.

[Dave]

Everyone loves a safety and the referees.

[Dan LeBatard]

Refuse to them it's like the most exciting play, so we've been told. It's like where the contact is initiated and where the football is. Both those things happen in the end zone. Why does no one want to call a safety?

[Stugotz]

I did not know the rule. I saw. I was impressed by Ross Tucker last night. Another hard working sport. He explained the rule instantaneously where he said in that instance, if you didn't see it, Dak Prescott was trying to get out of the end zone and it seemed like some of the football was still in the end zone. He says it's the opposite of the goal line. He says the goal line. When you score a touchdown on offense, all you've got to do is touch the goal line. On a safety, all that has to be in the end zone is a piece of the football still in the end zone. And it looked on video like there was still football in the end zone. So how was that not a safety?

[Roy]

It was a safety and they got it wrong. And Jake Ferguson did not commit OPI and they got that wrong too. So you know, if we're going to react overreact to what we saw on Thursday Night Football, I guess I don't know if the Cowboys would have survived that game. We would be having a different conversation than the one we're having. And if Jake Ferguson gets to, if that play doesn't get overturned, then that might be the conversation that the Cowboys are going to the playoffs and the Lions are finished. But I guess that's why. Here's the other thing about safety. Are we so limited? You're a wordsmith, Dan. Well, explain to me how we came up so short that we had to use the word safety to describe two things in football. I get it with the position, the position of safety. It's the last line of defense. If all else fails, at least we have somebody on the back end to keep us safe. What's Safe about a 300 pound man landing on you in the end zone? It's the opposite of safe. That's not safe. Why, why, why did we just that was at 4:59pm on a Friday. We'll just call that a safety to two points for that. And by the way, the one thing that does save. It's the most exotic symbol in all of sports, right? When. When they. I love. I love when this. When they.

[Stugotz]

Please stop doing that. Please. Your belly dancing. It's a bit sensual. I need you to stop doing that. I'm being made uncomfortable as I was when Tony came in here and with a profound disrespect of. For history proclaim today that Jameer Gibbs is the modern day Barry Sanders.

[Mike Ryan]

I did say that. I said that a couple weeks ago on my Tony's top five where I said Jameer Gibbs is better than Barry Sanders right now.

[Roy]

What?

[Stugotz]

Howie.

[Roy]

Howie Long said Jameer Gibbs is the best player in football a couple of weeks ago and I was struck by that. And I wonder who you would nominate if it's not Jameer Gibbs right now. A quick question for you before you answer that one, too. I asked Von Miller this and now I ask it to. To the gang here. You can only have one gold jacket or Lombardi. Which would you guys choose?

[Dave]

Super bowl champion players would all choose the gold jacket. They would all choose gold jacket.

[Roy]

Lombardi. Lombardi. You.

[Dave]

You all would.

[Roy]

I. You know, it's funny. Every guy and I've asked a bunch of guys this question. The only guy to ever get it wrong, in my opinion was, you'll be stunned, the only guy to ever say gold jacket. Well, actually two people have said it. Cam Newton took the gold jacket over the Lombardi and. And Antonio Brown.

[Dave]

They're being honest.

[Roy]

Gold jacket over the Lombardi.

[Dave]

They're being honest. So many more guys win the Lombardi than go to the.

[Stugotz]

We had, we had this question that we posed to Robert Horry one time because for, I'm just going to say years around here, we were having some version of the discussion of would you rather be Charles Barkley or Robert Horry? Robert Horry won six times and we asked Robert Horry and he said, I'd rather be Charles Bark.

[Dan LeBatard]

Dave, if there was a gold jacket on the field in Super Bowl 50, as opposed to a loose football, would Cam Newton have gone for that?

[Roy]

Ah, I get it. He. He didn't jump on the ball. The. The answer is.

[Stugotz]

What kind of laugh was that?

[Roy]

What patronizing one Kitty. Who chooses. Who chooses to enter my city and have a gay old time run amok and then disparage it on his way out of town? I may as well just go up to the Franco statue and knock the football out of his hand before you board your flight. Frank.

[Stugotz]

Damage. Good talking to you.

That is the thing that I will remember for this particular encounter.

[Roy]

Can I tell you something before I go? It's important.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Roy]

All right. This is. Listen high stakes. Obviously not just the division title and a playoff spot for the AFC north, but in this rivalry between Pittsburgh and Baltimore, these are the stakes. And if you're on the fence about which side to choose here. The Steelers are named after the mid century heroes who forged the steel that built the tanks and ships used to defeat the Nazi scourge. That's one side, the other Nazi. The Ravens are named after a poem written by a Boston native who married 13 year old cousin, moved to Baltimore, got drunk and died. Go ahead and root for Baltimore and root for Mussolini while you're at it because you're anti freedom. Goodbye Steelers.

[Dan LeBatard]

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[Dave]

Don LeBatard I saw a post on Twitter yesterday how the Toronto Maple Leafs.

[Roy]

Yeah.

[Dave]

That they won the division. Guess what? It's been two years and that's two years too long. Stugats could take that ass too. Ah, we're taking two asses. This is the Dan Levatar show with the stugats.

[Stugotz]

At Levitt's art show. Put it on the poll if you're rooting for the Ravens. Are you rooting for Mussolini?

[Dan LeBatard]

Also Nazi scourge.

[Stugotz]

Also also, I think he asked a good question. I don't know why it's called a safety And I don't know why in football they have safeties playing on defense and call it a safety when you get two points. Do any of you know why it's called a safety? Do we have origins of why it is that they named it a safety? Because I don't actually know the answer to his question. And as happens very often with football America, he leaves me to ponder a lot of irrelevant things that I had not pondered before. Jeremy appears.

[Dan LeBatard]

Jeremy has the answer.

[Roy]

It comes from an old rugby strategy because at the beginning of football, you would start with the ball placed near your goal line. So the safe strategy was to potentially run out of the back of the end zone the same way that the safety on the other side of the field is the last line of defense.

[Stugotz]

Thank you. And thank you as well to Damoshek. I was thinking during the game last night as I'm changing just rules all over the place because there are only. This is. It is funny to think about the fact that professional football only has Most games about 10 to 11 minutes of actual action. Most of it is just milling around, huddling. But the action in an NFL game is about 11 minutes. And so I'd like to just eliminate the quarterback sneak. I'd like to have it banished from football. I don't want it anymore in the game. It's not an interesting play. I want a team to have to run an actual play on fourth and short or third and short that has a chance of being contested. Is anyone with me on this just banishing the quarterback sneak? If you're going to only give me 11 minutes of action, I don't want any of it to be tush push. I don't want any of it to be quarterback sneak. So we're talking actual football.

[Mike Ryan]

We're talking the quintessential Brady quarterback sneak right under center. He takes it, he gets a yard. You want to abolish that?

[Stugotz]

I want to get rid of it. Because if you're only going to give me 11 minutes of action, I don't want any of the action to be that. It's too precious. And it's not a real play. It's nonsense. It's boring. Give me an actual football.

[Mike Ryan]

So you'd rather a fullback trap instead?

[Stugotz]

That's correct. Give it to Ingold. That's what I want. The ball in Ingold's hand. I want to bring back the fullback. Look at Damascek still arguing from the beyond.

[Roy]

Even though I want back on, I know I need. I have more to say. I'm not Done yet. I'm going to sit here and keep talking so you can. You can turn my mic on or not. Now here's what would jazz up the QB sneak and football in general. Let's move the goal posts back up to the goal line. Forget about them at the back of the end zone. Let's put them right there. How, what, what. What are utensil for the offense to run to.

[Dave]

To.

[Roy]

To be able to run the beat? Oh, it'd be the. Be the greatest. And by the way you line the ball up. Did they do this? I've asked old people about. I'm an old person now too. But what did they used to just line the ball up directly in front of the goal post because what's the defense for that? If you just run the ball like I'm gonna QB sneak it right into the goal post. Defender, the goal post is there, so you can't be there physically. Touchdown. I think that. But I like, I like where your head's at. And by the way, it's going to be real weird if the Eagles do win. It looks less and less likely, but if they win the super bowl on the back of the tush push again and then the NFL abolishes it, those titles are going to feel real weird that the primary reason they got them is a rule that has now been eradicated. That'd be very strange, right?

[Mike Ryan]

Dave, what year did they take the goalposts and move them to the back of the end zone?

[Roy]

I don't know. I would. I. It was. Must have been what, like 66 or there?

[Stugotz]

What does the Canadian Football League do with its actual goal posts? The goalposts aren't in the back of the end zone in the Canadian football.

[Roy]

They're 10 deep. I mean, I. There have to be so many videos in the cfl, from the CFL days of guys just smacking into those things, right? I mean, you can use.

[Stugotz]

I'm guessing that's. I'm guessing that's why they moved. There's no crossing route. I had to just guess. I'm going to say, like you mentioned safety. That seems to be something that would be deeply unsafe to have just basically a barricade in the middle of the steel beam.

[Mike Ryan]

Dan, call it what it is.

[Dan LeBatard]

It's a steel beam defender.

[Dave]

I just like the idea that one day like this literally happened, right? One day there was a meeting and someone in that meeting said, yo, that huge steel beam in the middle of the end zone, maybe we do something about it.

[Dan LeBatard]

I love how you're talking about it. It's in the past. When every CFP committee meeting moves the goalpost back.

[Stugotz]

Look who's still raw again with a college football analysis. Thank you. Damn it.

[Dan LeBatard]

Cleanly.

[Roy]

Well, they actually.

Tell Dan about. About the great list we talked about. Both have passed through Football America's halls recently and we've had great.

[Stugotz]

You sent me that list by email and I want you to stop bothering me with that list.

[Roy]

It's the greatest list I've ever put together and I put together all the great list.

[Stugotz]

Get him out. What say you, Football America? I'm telling you, fun and informative. Listen, and I'm really enjoying. We have never had quite this sound of indignation on our show before from any of our cast members. I don't even think that's his longest one. And that's just the one. That's the reaction to an accusation that I don't believe he could deny. But if he were to deny it, he would do so with bad breath, which is his garlic bread.

[Roy]

This made up tale about me. This is. This is what you've got. I saw me two dozen garlic rolls at Flanagan's.

[Dan LeBatard]

Dan.

[Stugotz]

His breath smelled like it. It smelled like a garlic factory.

[Roy]

Tony and his fake news. I don't like this talk. I don't like it one bit.

[Stugotz]

Get out of here.

[Roy]

Go back to talking about Crosby.

[Stugotz]

No. Get out of here.

[Roy]

No.

[Stugotz]

Damachek. Football America.

[Roy]

If you want.

Pittsburgh Penguin center Iceman. Maybe the greatest position group for one franchise in the history of people.

[Stugotz]

That's Robert Downey Jr going to a knee in Tropic Thunder and saying, I'm.

[Roy]

A farmer, mother.

[Dan LeBatard]

Happen to lose too.

[Roy]

Oh, I'm sorry. Concuss. Quarterback. You're. When you wake up, you're going to find out two points against you. Why? Safety.

[Stugotz]

Get out of here.

[Roy]

He's hurt. Don't you see he's down on these. It's not safe. What happened to him?

[Stugotz]

Football America is the name of the podcast. Please stop belly dancing. Damage. Sheik. I could smell your garlic breath from here. You. You ate two dozen garlic rolls.

[Dan LeBatard]

Take that hat off.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, two dozen garlic.

[Mike Ryan]

The girls like you want another?

[Stugotz]

No. It was. It was staggering to order.

[Roy]

The Dolphins greatest rival is the Jets. That's what I learned from.

[Stugotz]

Thank you. Thank you. Control the program. Just leave him picture in picture talking to himself. I don't want to hear his voice anymore on the show. If you want more damage, you can hear him and watch him on YouTube. Football America is the name of the podcast. Mike Ryan had a really lovely innocence about a first joyful experience with his daughter that he has not been able to do before. And I'm wondering if the rest of you took the same kind of delight in lying to your children and tricking your children with the. And spoiler alert. Spoiler alert. Because I got in trouble when I did this with Santa Claus. Spoiler alert. The tooth fairy. There have been allegations that perhaps that's not a real thing and not verifiable. There may indeed be a tooth fairy. But did you guys have fun with the tooth fairy experience?

[Dan LeBatard]

I think you talked around that well.

So we got. I got.

[Tony]

Some parent was like, all right, I.

[Roy]

Don'T think he's gonna do it.

[Tony]

And then he did it.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah.

[Tony]

Let me talk around this fake.

[Dan LeBatard]

All right. I've got three people that are dads to older, older children. So I'm curious. Your first one's expensive. Yeah. Well, that's another thing. I want to talk about what's going right for a tooth these days. But my daughter was a total pro. I was trying to help her out with it. I got so queasy trying to pull a tooth out of my 6 year old daughter's mouth and she just got like a piece of floss and she's like, I got it from here. Hey, don't worry. We're good, bro. Just like Colin Coward and LeBron James and Ben Simmons. We're good.

[Tony]

You can do the door method too.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, I want to do the football one where you tie like a piece of floss.

[Tony]

You just got to make sure that it's really ready to come out.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah, this one was really ready. And so we've been prepping for this because it's been loose for a couple of weeks. So we got this very way too sophisticated receptacle for the tooth. It's in a pouch, but inside the pouch, there's a vial with a little bottle top on it that you have to pop off. And she decided to put the placement of it hanging above her bed on a post.

[Roy]

Oh, wow.

[Dan LeBatard]

So I had to sneak in there like Ethan Hunt.

[Roy]

Wow.

[Dan LeBatard]

And have to undo this entire contraption. And also there was a slit for money, and I had to find cash. I haven't had cash since the Obama administration, but I got cash.

[Tony]

Can't Venmo her.

[Dan LeBatard]

I can't Venmo her. She doesn't have a Venmo. My going rate was $20, but. Whoa. It was $20.

[Stugotz]

That's a ton.

[Roy]

First tooth.

[Tony]

Parents get excited. It's a thing.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, that's a lot of money. So the teeth. Wait.

[Dan LeBatard]

Inflation later.

[Stugotz]

Okay, but you're gonna. So. So you're telling me that your children find that the tooth fairy gets on increasingly hard times after that first time and gets cheaper. Like, the tooth fairy evidently has a budget problem.

[Dan LeBatard]

She will learn.

[Stugotz]

The tooth fairy is broke. $20 sounds like way too much at Levitard show. Put it on the poll. Tooth fairy, tooth. $20 over or under?

[Dan LeBatard]

I got a dad chat, and there are some people that throw 50 bucks around.

[Roy]

Whoa.

[Stugotz]

Now. $20 sounds like too much for me.

[Tony]

A $5 first tooth and a dollar the rest of the way.

[Roy]

So you.

[Dan LeBatard]

You. You get their expectations high with the first one, and then you start undercutting them. It's like. It's a molar.

[Tony]

It's where they learn. Hey, sometimes in life, I would have.

[Stugotz]

Thought that you were such an asshole that you did it with bitcoin.

[Dan LeBatard]

I grew up, though.

[Roy]

I'm holding on to that.

[Stugotz]

I mean.

[Dan LeBatard]

But first, I want to ask, like, the dads here that have done this before. Placement of the tooth. Have you ever been caught? What's your. What's your method? And then you can tell me, like, the. The money that you lay under there. But get.

[Roy]

You got to get kind of, like.

[Dan LeBatard]

Thrilling because you're trying. You're like Indiana Jones.

[Tony]

You can't let her set the rules. You should have told her on the front end. Hey, the tooth fairy will not take.

[Roy]

The tooth unless it's under the pillow.

[Stugotz]

I know you want to do this.

[Tony]

Cool contraption thing, but we can't do.

[Stugotz]

It because I read the rules. Why are you, like, the Colts quarterback?

[Dave]

You know the rules.

[Dan LeBatard]

We haven't done it yet. Her baby teeth haven't come out yet, so we have to have that extracted at the dentist. Claire. How old is Claire?

[Stugotz]

Eight.

[Roy]

Whoa.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Tony]

Grayson's lost, like, 12 teeth.

[Stugotz]

It's going to be so weird to tell her there's a tooth fairy when she's 24 and you're taking out her first tooth. I can't believe she's 8 years old. Because I thought Claire. I thought Claire was older than Juliet, but I.

[Dan LeBatard]

She is.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, but two years older and hasn't lost a tooth? That sounds unusual.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah. It seems like I'm going to end up paying her $250 at 26 years old.

[Stugotz]

But does $20 not sound like a lot to you?

[Dave]

I feel like I probably gave $20 on the first two.

[Dan LeBatard]

I feel like your son broke your kneecap and told you, hey, give me 50.

[Stugotz]

I feel like $5 is the right amount.

[Roy]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

To give a child no idea about money.

[Mike Ryan]

You can give them a piece of paper and they're like, oh yeah, cool.

[Stugotz]

All the more reason to.

[Dan LeBatard]

I owe you.

[Tony]

You can tell them that $5 bill is $500.

[Mike Ryan]

You could give them a $1 bill and be like, this is a million dollars.

[Dan LeBatard]

Okay. A little judgy. I was excited, you know.

[Tony]

No, I think I probably did 20, the first tooth too. Even though I'm saying five now is the right number.

[Stugotz]

No, but it's rich. You guys are going very. You're going, that's heavy handed for a child to give $20 for a tooth. Especially if. If you're going to walk it back.

[Roy]

And you're looking at a golden cane. Dan, he's good for it.

[Dan LeBatard]

You want to talk about inflation? Ever since I joined, it's gone up like 5k every year. This is insane.

[Stugotz]

I imagine that the players have gotten a lot more expensive to pandemic started.

[Dan LeBatard]

I just pieced it together.

Never mind the extra stuff down.

[Stugotz]

Just figured out. So none of you have had a wonderful or innocent tooth fairy experience?

[Tony]

Well, he's asking the opposite. Have we gotten caught?

[Dan LeBatard]

Have you been busted?

[Tony]

No, I've not.

[Dan LeBatard]

Because if you put it under the, the, the pillow, you also have to make sure like how, how wonder are we talking? Is it central in the pillow? Because then you want to talk about Indiana Jones and the sandbag. Like how do you do both?

[Tony]

In my experience, when once these kids are actually asleep, you could pick them.

[Stugotz]

Up and move them like these, these.

[Dave]

Kids don't wake up waking up by being nudged a little bit. And even if they wake up, you.

[Tony]

Could be like, this is a dream. And then they just go right back to sleep.

[Dan LeBatard]

But this guy's a good dad.

[Dave]

You're a good dad.

[Dan LeBatard]

This guy's a good dad. A guy.

[Roy]

This isn't real.

[Tony]

You can make it scary too.

[Roy]

Like, I'm gonna kill you. Like, whoa.

[Dan LeBatard]

Probably not a good idea.

[Tony]

My daughter's into scary dreams right now.

[Stugotz]

None of you had an innocent experience with this where you just delighted in the doing of.

[Dan LeBatard]

Was wonderful. It was a real rush. Heart was pumping. You don't want to wake him up.

[Roy]

Wow.

[Dan LeBatard]

And it's, you know, it's a benchmark. It's a cute little thing. I can't believe. I can't wait for Roy to do it. When Claire's in high school.

Now's a good time to remember where Tequila's story truly began. In 1795, Cuervo Inv. Tequila.

[Stugotz]

Cuervo.

[Dan LeBatard]

What are you doing here?

[Stugotz]

Cuervo. Anytime someone says Cuervo, I show up.

[Dan LeBatard]

Well, I do know that to be true. But even during ad reads like Cuervo, I think you could lay out, especially for one of our great partners.

[Stugotz]

Sweet, delicious Cuervo.

[Dan LeBatard]

Since then, Cuervo has stayed true to its roots. The same family, the same land, the same passion.

[Stugotz]

Cuervo.

[Dan LeBatard]

So enjoy the tequila that started it all. Cuervo. Cuervo, the tequila that invented tequila.

[Tony]

Proximo.

[Dan LeBatard]

Cuervo.com, please drink responsibly.

[Stugotz]

Cuervo.