The Big Suey: Best Dismissal

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

Episode: The Big Suey: Best Dismissal (August 28, 2025)

Hosts: Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, Billy Gill, Greg Cody, and more
Location: Elser Hotel, Downtown Miami

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Overview

This episode centers on both the usual lighthearted banter around sports, pop culture, and the idiosyncrasies of everyday life, as well as a tongue-in-cheek celebration of dismissiveness: The 2025 Suey Awards for “Best Dismissal.” The crew provides their typically irreverent commentary on everything from breakfast sandwiches and office spreads to Lionel Messi’s ageless brilliance and a cavalcade of people and things worthy of being "dismissed."

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Workplace Food Culture & Zaslow’s Radio Rise

• Early Segment (05:00-06:50)

  • The crew jokes about Zaslow getting "late career stardom" and perks like first-class flights from ESPN.
  • They share quips about different standards in radio versus new media:
  • Greg Cody observes: "My dad still wanders around making fun of ESPN because he says... They gave me a contract where they gave me first class flights, and then they didn’t send me anywhere." (04:47)

• Zaslow's appetite and the high value of provided food in the radio/Meadowlark workspace are roasted incessantly.

  • Billy Gill: "If I’ve learned anything about Zaslow... my guy gets after it, okay?" (03:47)

• Running joke on the value of being fed at work versus previous radio jobs:

  • "They were not feeding him, they were eating him." – Greg Cody (06:40)

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2. Lionel Messi's MLS Heroics & The Messi vs. Ronaldo Debate

• Game recap (07:10 - 13:00):

  • Discussion of Messi scoring two clutch goals (77', 88') for Inter Miami in a Leagues Cup match against Orlando.

  • The crew expresses disbelief at Messi's elite performance despite his age and recent injuries.

  • Dan Le Batard: "He’s already done it against the best competition... and he’s still at the top of the sport. It doesn’t make any sense to me." (07:12)

  • They clarify tournament structures and mock the confusion surrounding soccer cups in the U.S.

  • Billy Gill: "Is this the one they give you the serving dish for?" (08:31)

• Messi vs. Ronaldo’s Career Paths (09:50-13:20):

  • Discusses Saudi offers, Messi's legacy compared to Ronaldo, and perceived tarnishing of reputation.
  • Greg Cody notes the aging of sports stars vs. Messi’s longevity: "At this age in that sport, you’re not supposed to have the legs against young people in the 88th minute..." (11:28)
  • Dan Le Batard claims the “debate got put to rest with the World Cup” (11:55) and highlights Messi's continued relevance for Argentina.

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3. Aging, Greatness & Athlete Longevity

• Multi-sport comparisons (13:05-14:50):
  • Reflecting on how stars like Serena Williams, Brady, LeBron, and Messi maintain top form beyond typical career arcs.
  • Greg Cody: "...to have Messi age to separate himself from Ronaldo at the age when these people should fall apart... I watched when Messi became the best player in the world." (13:05)

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4. Oddities of Modern Life: Thermometer Locks & Notaries

• Pharmacy security (18:33-21:04):
  • Billy Gill describes the weirdness of needing assistance for items like thermometers and razors due to anti-theft measures.
  • "I think if you take a magnet, you can unlock all those locks..." – Billy Gill (20:32)
• Notaries (38:49-39:09):
  • Chris Cody and Billy Gill riff on the archaic but persistent practice of notarizing documents: "My friend's mom's gonna stamp this paper. Now it's official." (38:49)

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5. Suey Awards: Best Dismissal – Nominees and Memorable Dismissals

• Segment Start (25:30):
  • Classic clips of the year's most savage, funny, or bizarre dismissals from show regulars and famous guests.
  • Range from dismissing European culture to declining to entertain certain sports analysis or public figures.

Selected Dismissal Highlights

• Billy Gill on Europe:
  "Europe sucks. I don’t know if you’re aware of this. That’s why everybody’s here in America, because everyone decided...Europe is terrible." (27:59)
• Bob Costas dismissing Billy Gill:
  "This is what happens when you don’t know jack shit, okay? Saturday Night Live, Letterman, Leno, Carson, Conan, basketball, Pootie Tang, the paper..." (33:01)
• Nick Turturro on Bob Costas:
  "I can’t take Costas no more. ...Can you let it breathe please? We know you know a lot about baseball. Stop being, you know, smarter than the game." (29:40)
• Jessica Smetana on Halloween in Miami:
  "It’s not spooky at all in Florida. It’s 100 degrees. There’s no giant skeletons. There’s no jack o’ lanterns. Just cafecito." (39:12)

On Show Culture & The Art of Dismissal

• Greg Cody: "You crushed that category...I did not realize we might have a challenger to a Stugotz dismissal this year." (42:25)
• Billy Gill’s ability to joyfully irritate “self-important people” is a recurring theme.
  • "There’s no people’s time I like to waste more than important people." – Billy Gill (41:25)

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6. Inner Circles & Best Friendships

• Friend groups (21:00-23:40):
  • The crew explores the concept of “inner circles,” best friends, and exclusivity. Billy admits to a minuscule trusted circle; Chris Cody laments not having a clear best friend.
  • "You don’t wanna be in my inner circle. I don’t wanna be in my inner circle." – Billy Gill (21:50)
  • Greg Cody: "It’s unusual not to have a best friend." (22:57)

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote | |-----------|----------------|------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:47 | Billy Gill | "If I've learned anything about Zaslow... my guy gets after it, okay?" | | 04:47 | Greg Cody | "My dad still wanders around making fun of ESPN... They gave me first class flights & never sent me anywhere." | | 07:12 | Dan Le Batard | "He's already done it against the best competition... and he's still at the top of the sport." | | 11:28 | Greg Cody | "...at this age in that sport, you're not supposed to have the legs against young people..." | | 11:55 | Dan Le Batard | "...that debate got put to rest with the World Cup and what he was able to do then." | | 20:32 | Billy Gill | "I think if you take a magnet, you can unlock all those locks and just get the thermometers..."| | 21:50 | Billy Gill | "You don’t wanna be in my inner circle. I don’t wanna be in my inner circle." | | 27:59 | Billy Gill | "Europe sucks. I don’t know if you’re aware of this..." | | 33:01 | Bob Costas | "This is what happens when you don't know jack shit, okay? ... Pootie Tang, the paper..." | | 39:12 | Jessica Smetana| "It's not spooky at all in Florida. ...Just cafecito. It's hot all the time and it sucks." | | 41:25 | Billy Gill | "There’s no people’s time I like to waste more than important people." | | 42:25 | Greg Cody | "You crushed that category...we might have a challenger to a Stugotz dismissal this year." |

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Suey Award Segment Structure (25:30–44:00)

• Rapid-fire montage of best dismissals from crew & guests: from sports personalities (Bob Costas, David Sampson) to cultural topics (Europe, Oscars, emotional-support animals).
• Spirited, irreverent debate about why "dismissing" things makes for such good content.
• Recognition of Billy Gill’s prodigious output in the art of on-air dismissals.

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Episode Vibe & Tone

• Irreverent, self-deprecating, and sharply observational.
• Banter-driven, full of inside jokes and affectionate ribbing.
• Playfully combative, especially around generational divides, cultural preferences, and sports fanaticism.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Segment Description | Timestamp Range | |-----------------------------------------------|-------------------| | Zaslow, food, & radio stardom | 03:45 - 07:00 | | Messi, MLS, and aging athletes | 07:10 - 14:50 | | Thermometers, razors, and pharmacy oddities | 18:33 - 21:04 | | Inner circles & friendship | 21:00 - 23:40 | | Suey Awards for Best Dismissal montage | 25:30 - 44:00 |

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Memorable Moments

• Billy Gill’s Europe rant as an all-time classic, equating Epcot in Disney to a superior version of the entire continent (27:59).
• Bob Costas roasting Billy Gill live and then hearing later that Costas texted Adnan Virk, saying he "scorched him" (33:01, 41:12).
• The Suey montage: A celebration of the show’s penchant for irreverence, featuring a parade of dismissals targeting everyone from Tom Brady's teeth to the concept of vow renewals.

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Conclusion

This episode is a microcosm of what makes The Dan Le Batard Show so beloved: sports analysis, deeply unserious social commentary, and a grand celebration of the art of the dismissive burn. Whether breaking down Messi’s unbreakable brilliance, lampooning office lunch hierarchy, or awarding the best on-air snubs, the show remains a jubilant pylon at the intersection of fandom, culture, and comedy.

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For more highlights and to vote on the 2025 Suey Awards, visit lebatardaf.com
Winners announced September 2nd!

Transcript

[Dan Le Batard]

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[Billy Gill]

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[Greg Cody]

Welcome to the Big Sui presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show?

[Billy Gill]

The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast. I'm sorry. I'm not gonna apologize for that.

[Greg Cody]

In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.

[Billy Gill]

I've done it. And now here's the Marching man to.

[Greg Cody]

Nowhere, Fat face and the habitual liar.

[Billy Gill]

This episode is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings. The Crown is yours.

[Greg Cody]

Zaslow is getting a bit too comfortable with his stardom. With everything happening with him. He's really. It's been quite the Late career Blossom, not unlike Chris Mad Dog Russo here. What do you.

[Billy Gill]

How old do you think he is? Late career Blossom. Mad Dog Russo.

[Greg Cody]

Morning radio age Zaslow by 477 years.

[Billy Gill]

I'll never get those years back. That's how life goes, you know, you can't get years back.

[Greg Cody]

Zaslow I saw aged more than Obama because of what morning radio did to him. The presidency was less hard on Obama than morning radio was on Zazz.

[Billy Gill]

I was the president of morning radio.

[Greg Cody]

Yes, he was. And one of the things that I've noticed around here, though, in him getting comfortable, and he just went up against the break there, and he had a point, but he was casually, you know, rolling his finger around while wearing Cody's jacket. And the thing that I noticed is that the. The smell of Zaslo singing near my ear earlier in the show still smells like the breakfast that Zaslo enjoyed. Chris, why are you mouthing?

[Billy Gill]

Oh, my God, Zaslow, he likes to eat. That's what I've learned. If I've learned anything about Zaslow in these months working with them, my guy gets after it, okay? I take part in all of the meals that are given, but I'm not some glutton. I don't take seconds. I mean, like, maybe your share. I had more than my share. I had half a croissant, egg, and cheese sandwich. The one thing you've learned about Zaslo, he likes to eat. What a. What a dick move.

[Dan Le Batard]

I learned his son's an ingrate, and.

[Billy Gill]

He likes the Arab fighters and Thai food. Now I'm going to starve myself.

[Dan Le Batard]

Also, he may not know what Thai food is.

[Billy Gill]

I mean, Zaz is telling me all the time that he talks about what we have at his ESPN meetings. It's like the daily, like, what I do spread today. I do love bragging to them at Yahoo.

[Dan Le Batard]

Great.

[Billy Gill]

They can. Like, they could tell that you've been eating. You think so? Oh, they could tell. Yeah. How old are you? Just out of curiosity? 44. 44. I did some research. So Mad Dog launched mad dog radio 49. So Dan wasn't that far off in terms of, like, late.

[Greg Cody]

Look, Zazlo, Zazzle right now is being flown first class. I don't know if you know what's happening at espn, but Mel Kuiper and Orlovsky on fire. And I told you a long time ago, Dilfer got mad because Herb street had a plane, and they said, see you later, Dilfer. And Zaslow's got first class. It's hard to get first class. My dad still wanders around making fun of ESPN because he says, you know what they tried to do? They gave me a contract where they gave me first class flights, and then they didn't send me anywhere. He said, what kind of guy? He's like, what is that? You can get my father on the phone, he'll start complaining while still taking Disney's benefits. Zaslo getting first class a big deal. I don't think radio gives around first class to anybody.

[Dan Le Batard]

Have you explained to your dad that maybe ESPN is also laughing? Like, hey, we conceded first class flights to a guy that we never sent anywhere anything.

[Billy Gill]

You see one.

[Greg Cody]

Zaslow is rising in the industry, but he's gotten to ESPN where people are burning, and he keeps bragging about the sandwiches we have around here. So that's a real victory for metal arc media that spread Zaslow. Plural. Good spreads.

[Billy Gill]

Yeah.

[Greg Cody]

And you still smell like the morning breakfast, but there is no reason for you to stick around for the lunch.

[Billy Gill]

You feel like, I'm having enough in the breakfast.

[Greg Cody]

Well, I'm just saying I have enjoyed that.

[Billy Gill]

You. What are we doing to this man? He's shown up here, worked hard, been a pleasure to be around, and we're throwing him under the bus. That's what we do here.

[Greg Cody]

No, no, no, Jeremy, you're misunderstanding what's happening here. I am wildly grateful in general for. But Zaz is wildly grateful that anyone in radio will feed you.

[Billy Gill]

Yeah. I've never had a job where food was provided. Are you kidding me? All right, breakfast and lunch here. Come on.

[Greg Cody]

But he comes through like, you know, guys. You guys know what's happening to radio, right? Like, the last bit of that was chewing up Zaslo. They were not feeding him. They were eating him.

[Billy Gill]

I mean, the radio. Honestly, they're sending in Tom, Dick, and Jane first class. Like they kind of deserve what they have coming.

[Greg Cody]

Why did you get any Tom, Dick, and James when you're clearly a bigger star than Freddie Fitz?

[Billy Gill]

That's not a real person. We never got the results on that one. Freddie. Freddie Fitz might be bigger.

[Dan Le Batard]

Do you think? Harry's like, how did Jane get in there?

[Greg Cody]

We have not yet talked about what Lionel Messi did last night, and I made a mistake in not 25 doing so because he scores in the 88th minute, two goals and he's coming off of hamstring issues. And I know he's better than any league. I just am legitimately confused by how it is that this person has not aged like you. I understand that this isn't the best competition for him, but he's already done it against the best competition as recently as like 18 months ago. And he's still at the top of the sport. And it doesn't make any sense to me.

[Dan Le Batard]

He's doing the things that he would do at Barcelona where hey, we just need to give it to our best player and he just needs to be a demigod here. So he did it at every level. Stands a reason he'd do it at mls. But it felt inevitable. They were down late in that game to a bitter rival in Orlando.

[Greg Cody]

He scores at the 77th minute and the 88th minute he get.

[Billy Gill]

He.

[Dan Le Batard]

He executes a penalty which gave Orlando a red card. And you know, once he buries that equalizer, it's only a matter of time before he takes advantage of a team that's a man down and puts Inter Miami into their second leagues cup final. Billy, are we clear on what the.

[Billy Gill]

Leagues cup final championship. Like this is no. 1.

[Greg Cody]

No, this is, this is the one. The other one that no one was impressed by them.

[Billy Gill]

I know it's a real one.

[Dan Le Batard]

Dan, let correct you. It's not the other one.

[Billy Gill]

Is this the one they give you the serving dish for?

[Dan Le Batard]

I think this one's a serving dish. Yeah, this one's a serving dish, but it's also not the other, other one. This is probably, well, U.S. open Cup.

[Billy Gill]

They won this one already. They did?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yes. No, they won this one.

[Greg Cody]

No, not this one. The one that we're presently in.

[Dan Le Batard]

They haven't won this one previously two years ago.

[Billy Gill]

But this isn't the championship, even though it's called the league's cup.

[Dan Le Batard]

So it's called the league's cup because they share this tournament with Liga Mekis in Mexico.

[Billy Gill]

I'm more confused now.

[Dan Le Batard]

However, the Mexican teams are always garbage and they, they do very poorly in this tournament. So the semifinals were all MLS teams. Miami played Orlando, Seattle played LA Galaxy. Seattle ended up winning their semifinal. So Messi who didn't want to play in the all Star game because of.

[Billy Gill]

All this bonkers travel game for this.

[Dan Le Batard]

Leagues right now he has to hop on a plane and fly all the way to Seattle to win another league's cup. So we'll see if they do that. And that's more hardware for Inter Miami and what's been a wildly successful venture. We had Taylor Twelveman on and make some news last week. He said with a lot of certainty that he expects Messi in that Inter Miami uniform when that stadium opens. The expectation among Inter Miami is they've got a very good proposal out to Messi.

[Billy Gill]

He actually laughed at the notion that he might not be in that.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, there's, there's, there's a ton of confidence that Messi will be here.

[Billy Gill]

No, you gotta, you gotta. I mean, look, it's not the most ethical thing in the world, but you gotta start talking to the Saudis, right? Like, if you're him, you go and you flirt with the Saudis. Like, I don't know, the stadium looks nice next to that airport. I'm sure traffic's not gonna be a nightmare. But, you know, that Saudi money looks pretty good over there.

[Dan Le Batard]

If there's one thing that we know, it's that Messi's not gonna follow in Ronaldo's footsteps. That's. That is not the thing he's gonna do.

[Billy Gill]

But the guy turned down a ton of money from the Saudis because it was like, well, I can't play for the Saudis. And then they just went and played there anyways in exhibition.

[Dan Le Batard]

Let me correct you. Messi did not turn down a lot of money from the Saudis. He is an ambassador for their tourism industry and he is collecting a lot of money from the Saudis. He's just not collecting money from them to play.

[Greg Cody]

It wasn't that long ago before we were talking about the Saudi money as it related to soccer players, that all over the globe you would have gotten a split on who's the best player in the world, Ronaldo or Messi. It wasn't that long ago, I'm going to say four years ago, five years ago. And what's happened with the late parts of their career when I tell you, look, I saw what Zlatan did coming over here and doing what he was trying to do for this sport, for Messi to play at the top of this one, in the top of the game, while Ronaldo has cheapened himself in all of the ways to see the separation of what was what wasn't that long ago a legitimate argument and now is not any kind of debate. Messi has separated himself as best in the world over this last stretch of career management. And I, I'm genuinely stunned when I tell you that at this age in that sport, you're not supposed to have the legs against young people to be the one who can do it in the 88th minute. Like that's how aging is supposed to happen. You're going to get slower and more tired and late in the game you're going to fade away. Against young legs, hungry legs. But he's still at the top of the whole thing.

[Billy Gill]

Seems that he conserves himself throughout the game pretty well. Like he does a lot of walking out there.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, on the ball he can be quick when he needs to be. He is very smart about conserving his energy and that's going to be how he ages with grace. He's a dynamite player. And yeah, it kind of feels I already know this is going to get clipped for social because of the engagement on Messi and Ronaldo. So what I'm about to say may be perceived as inflammatory, but I think that debate got put to rest with the World cup and what he was able to do then. And look, Ronaldo scoring goals in Saudi Arabia.

[Billy Gill]

Saudi Arabia compared to mls.

[Dan Le Batard]

Look, Al Hilal had a much further run than Inter Miami had in the club World Cup. Al Hilal beat Manchester City. There is good quality sides there. They spend a lot of money, a lot more money than MLS clubs do on their talent. So I don't like Ronaldo fans and stands may have the ability to say he's doing it against tougher competition and I'm not really interested in that debate. But Messi still seems to be a top 15 player in the world and it's not just an MLS. He's still the talisman for Argentina. Everything runs through Messi and we're going to see in another World cup where he's going to be damn near 40 or if not at 40 years old and he's still going to be the best player and most dependent on player for Argentina.

[Greg Cody]

Ronaldo is what age and Messi is what age? Because I will tell you again, I will not get used to how it is that Serena and Tom Brady and LeBron James and Diana Taurasi age have scientific precedent before this recent time to have Messi age to separate himself from Ronaldo at the age when these people should fall apart like Ronaldo is a greatest of all time debate just usually doesn't fall apart that way right in front of you while you're watching it so that you don't even have to do the history 30 years from now. I watched when it is that Messi became the best player in the world.

[Dan Le Batard]

Ronaldo is 40 years old. Messi is presently 38. However, Ronaldo will say himself that he is biologically 27.

[Greg Cody]

The body type on Messi must help him age at least a little bit better than Ronaldo would age.

[Dan Le Batard]

This is a player that, especially in Europe, how do you, how do you stop Messi? You have to get physical with him. He is the best player that opposing defenders will ever see.

[Billy Gill]

There was a lot of complaining last night right from Orlando City.

[Dan Le Batard]

So he's been subject over the course of his over 20 year career, two horrendous tackles, people trying to get a pound of flesh from him, quite literally because he's small, because he's smaller in stature, people try to put their shoulder in him. So that body has taken a beating. And what we've seen in the latter stage of his career here, that soft tissue injury reputation that he's starting to develop. But he just came back to the team fresh from injury and won them the game almost single handedly last night. He's an incredible player and probably the greatest athlete of our lifetimes. And we're blessed to be living in this generation, even though we're probably living in the echo of a universe that already died thousands of years ago.

[Greg Cody]

He's not the best athlete of this generation. LeBron is now.

[Dan Le Batard]

This is a different now. Bailey's got an algorithm. Shohei Ohtani is Serena Williams. I'm an ally.

[Greg Cody]

Connor McDavid is Connor McDonald MC overrated.

[Billy Gill]

Joey Chestnut. Venus Williams Zazigri, Serena Williams. Steve Martin, also one of the Williams.

[Dan Le Batard]

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[Billy Gill]

Hey Mike.

[Dan Le Batard]

Hey man. Summer's almost ending, man. I don't like that. There's no way. There's no way I am excited about cooler temperatures. But down here in South Florida, that just means slightly less boiling hot. It's been a pretty incredible summer. We've had a parade down here. We've grown our family down here at Meadowlark Media. A lot of exciting things, a lot of memorable benchmarks. And along the way, at almost every step, I've been tailed by that beautiful white can of Miller Lite. Oh, that beautiful white or the brown bottle. You can do it on draft.

[Billy Gill]

Draft is crisp.

[Dan Le Batard]

There's been so many great special times and each time I've decided to make those special times a Miller time. Whether it's a long weekend like one we got coming up, or a full on vacation, it is a perfect time to get the crew back together. This year marks 50 years of Miller time. 50 years of great taste, great friends and unforgettable memories. Miller Lite Great Taste 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. Cheers to 50 years of Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

[Billy Gill]

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[Greg Cody]

Yeah, it's the only kind he tells.

[Billy Gill]

It was a short one for me. I tried to speed it up for you guys.

[Dan Le Batard]

You forgot about the league's cup stugats.

[Greg Cody]

La Carreta is a place where the best of the celebrations has to be the 97 Marlin celebration because it was Levado.

[Billy Gill]

Well, when Fidel died the first time. This is the Dan Levatar show With the stugats.

[Greg Cody]

Billy, Thermometers?

[Billy Gill]

Yeah. We're locked up. What do you want me to do? I can't do anything about it. I ended up getting one. I talked to the guy. I said, hey, can you give me. You know how embarrassing it is to walk up to someone like, hey, I need your key to, like, unlock something. Like, whoa. And like, the people. Why are you doing that with your voice? Whoa, look at. Look at this guy. What's he up to? What's he gonna buy here? But just Sudafed or something? It's like, no, I just need a thermometer. Why did they always. I think they still do this, actually, where they keep the razors behind the locked glass. I mean, that one I understand more than thermometers.

[Greg Cody]

So what. What is the strangest or most curious thing that you've had to. Like the cold medicine is something. I don't know whether we all learn this at the same time. I don't know when this became a thing. The idea of. Of putting a case around certain things because people will steal it to use as drugs. To use to. The things that are being hidden are not necessarily just the expensive things. Right. There are things like razors that you could do damage with. And so what are the. Like, why are the thermometers in there?

[Billy Gill]

I don't know. Because it was a flexible digital thermometer. It wasn't even, like, it had, like, the. Whatever the silver stuff is that the old ones used to have mercury. It has to be to avoid theft. I used to do that mercury thermometer. My mom will put it right under my tongue. Huh. You ever put it up to take the little lamp? Well, like, I'm Ferris Bueller. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you weren't a delinquent, huh? If it's. If it broke because they were glass. If it broke. Did you like. Oh, what do I. What do I do? You have. You have to run out the house. You ever touch the mercury? No. Curious touching, like, oh, wow, this thing sticks together. Oh, that's like poison, dude. Really?

[Greg Cody]

Yeah.

[Billy Gill]

Maybe for people like you put on.

[Greg Cody]

The poll at Lebatard show. Is the mercury inside of a thermometer poison? And also, Jeremy, look up for me when it is that drugstores started doing the thing of putting things in a case so that Billy has to suffer the embarrassment of he wants a thermometer.

[Billy Gill]

Now he's got a case even. It was like a bike chain that they had on it or something. It was like on a little like.

[Greg Cody]

A pen at the bank.

[Billy Gill]

It was like. It was like a little. It was hanging from a little hook where you can't slide it off. And then they had, like, this, like, lock on it. The guy had to come in. I think it was just a magnet. I don't want to tell people how to get around the locks there, but I think he just had a magnet. I think if you take a magnet, you can unlock all those locks and just get the thermometers all you want. I was watching. It didn't. Wasn't like a code. It didn't steal his code. If you're gonna unlock something with a magnet, there was no lock. I think it was just a magnet. Take a magnet if you need to go work underwater. Magnets don't work underwater.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's what I heard.

[Greg Cody]

Chris Cody said something today that was both surprising and not surprising and got me to thinking. Billy just said earlier he doesn't have an inner circle. It's his wife and his daughter, and that's it.

[Billy Gill]

No, no, I said people I've impregnated. And. And the people that have come out of the people I've impregnated. I didn't specify. That's your crew.

[Greg Cody]

Okay. Yeah, you didn't specify. So it might be more than just your wife.

[Billy Gill]

And I just, you know. I didn't specify.

[Greg Cody]

All right, so the. All right, so the inner business. Okay, you might have a secret family.

[Billy Gill]

Can someone just show up and say, you impregnated me, so I'm part of your crew now?

[Greg Cody]

They could be part of the inner circle.

[Billy Gill]

I have a specific. Look, I think I could figure out pretty quickly if I did impregnate them or not.

[Greg Cody]

You know, I think it is very hard to get into Billy's inner circle, but I think it is easier, much easier to get.

[Billy Gill]

You don't wanna get in, like. I'm just. I'm just. I don't mean to interrupt you, but you. Like, we're making this a whole to do. You don't wanna be in my inner circle. I don't wanna be in my inner circle.

[Greg Cody]

I've been texting you. The way everyone texts you, and Fuentes is the one who gets texts back. And that's how I arrive at the arrival at the place that. Your inner circle is very tight. Fuentes has bragged everyone he got 11 texts from you. Or there was. There was 11.

[Billy Gill]

No, no texts in between us. They could have been 10 from him in one response. He was very vague about it intentionally.

[Greg Cody]

Well, but he did tell the room that he had an access to you that the rest of us do not have. But Chris does this differently. Chris. I believe his inner circle is easier to get into. However, the deepest points in his inner circle might not be as deep. Because Chris said, I don't have a best friend.

[Billy Gill]

Yeah, it was kind of like in that inner circle talk, I was just kind of thinking, like, who's my inner circle? And I do have an inner circle, and I have friends. I'd say I have seven to 10 friends that I'd call really close. That's a lot of friends at this age. But I don't have anyone that. There's not one that I'm like, that's my best friend, and I want a best friend.

[Greg Cody]

Put it on the poll at LeBatard show. Do you have a best friend? Because I think it's unusual not to have a best friend.

[Billy Gill]

Not saying, my wife don't. Just. Let's stop that right there. Your spouse is not your best friend. What a loser would say that. My wife's my best friend. Here we go. Who's your best friend? Oh, boy. Dan, you know what he's gonna say.

[Greg Cody]

It was my brother.

[Billy Gill]

Oh, not your wife. Somehow more awkward. Not what I thought he was gonna say.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's not the question that he asked. He asked, who's your best friend right now? That was gratuitous. Living in fact. Penalty box out of here. Not fair to do that.

[Billy Gill]

I don't feel good about this.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's not fair to do that. What? I mean, he asked him a question. Who's your best friend? Not who it was. I mean, come on.

[Greg Cody]

What's the penalty?

[Dan Le Batard]

Making us feel like shit.

[Greg Cody]

All right, hold on a second. Let me see if I have that first.

[Billy Gill]

I think we have that. One more of Ethan's voice. Four of the eleven texts between me and Frentas was, what time is mystery crate starting? Hey, come down. It's time to start. And me saying, okay, that's who you're jealous of. Minor penalty, two minutes.

[Dan Le Batard]

Peste Tremenda, Coma Mieda.

[Billy Gill]

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[Greg Cody]

Wait a minute, wait a minute.

[Billy Gill]

You're getting sexier by the moment.

[Greg Cody]

Slow down. We haven't even gotten stug.

[Billy Gill]

Jason Sanders, you're unnoticed. Wow.

[Greg Cody]

Oh, my God.

[Billy Gill]

What? In spite of him. Oh, wow. I love you, Duke. This is the Dan Levatar show with the stugats. Let's get the best dismissal. This 2025 Suey Awards are presented by Miller Light. Cast your [e-mail] Winners will be announced this upcoming Tuesday, September 2nd. This is best dismissal. And now the suey nominees for best dismissal. Billy Gill and Greg Cody dismiss the Savannah Bananas. It's a clown show. Banana ball. You're running around wearing capes. Actual capes. Look at that dimension. That left field Wall is 120ft away. It's just a modern day Harlem Globetrotters, which I. What's wrong with that? I thought we had all outgrown that, you know, throwing a bucket of water on somebody, but. Oh, there's confetti in there. It's not water. Oh. Tom Cruise dismisses Father's Day. Also, got to ask, Father's Day is just around the corner. What would an ideal Father's Day look like for you?

[Dan Le Batard]

Hey, you know, just having fun, man. Making movies, big adventure, having a great time.

[Billy Gill]

Greg Cody dismisses NFL red zone. I enjoy watching one game at a time, okay? I'm anti red zone. Isolated. Yeah, I mean, my wife's watching Red zone. It's like a flurry of in its overload of information going from one game to the next and then back to here and back to there. Red zone's showing. Plays aren't even in the red zone. It's a. It's a misnamed network. I want a network that shows me the shank. Shunts. Yes. Careful. All punts. The all punt.

[Greg Cody]

Why not? The apn Onestad would be addicted to it.

[Billy Gill]

He would be. Nick Wright dismisses Tony's football analysis. We look at the chief side and I feel bad saying this because Nick Wright is over our shoulder. We're looking at a team that if things go the opposite way, this is a laughingstock of a team that doesn't make the playoffs. Okay. Yeah. That's why Tony's on that side of the room to not really pepper in those sports. Come on, Nick. I mean, I mean, the thing is, like, I like Tony, but I'm just telling you, you. Yes, I. I agree that if you turned their wins into losses, their record would have been worse.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's all I'm saying.

[Billy Gill]

Billy Gill dismisses Europe. Europe sucks. I don't know if you're aware of this. Like, we keep saying, like, well, in Europe, this would. Europe is terrible. Which is why all of us left Europe. That's why everybody's here in America, because everyone decided, you know what? Europe is terrible. Like, the English decided, the Spaniards decided, the Italians decided. Every single person came together at one point in time and said, you know what? We may not disagree on a lot of things, but we can all agree Europe sucks. Let's just jump on this boat and see where it takes us. Cuz we can't be here anymore because Europe, again, terrible. No air conditioning. Everything is old, horrible. All they do is try to steal American culture and then tell you all of their old crap is so great. Europe, terrible. And it takes forever to get there. Forever to get there. If I'm boarding a plane for eight hours, Europe better not be where I'm landing. Actor Nick Turturro dismisses Bob Costas. I can't take Costas no more. Oh, no, let me watch the game, I said. I just. I was yelling at the tv. Let me watch the game. Bob, please shut up. And he wouldn't shut up. He would not shut up when I'm watching a game. He was like, interrupting me and I was just like, can you let it breathe, please? We know you know a lot about baseball. Stop being, you know, smarter than the game. You're not. Bob Costas dismisses Billy Gill, one of your limited frame of reference, peanut gallery guys said at one point, you know, I don't even know why he's called Bob. He's the kind of guy that really should have been, even in grade school, would have demanded that he be called Robert. This is what happens when you don't know jack shit, okay? Saturday Night Live, Letterman, Leno, Carson, Conan, basketball, Pootie Tang, the paper. Yes. You know, if somebody Knew as little, even if they were 20 years old, knew as little about baseball history and then was talking about last night's game with no frame of reference. They'd be laughed out of the room. You know, laughter, that kind of thing. Greg Cody dismisses the Oscars. The Oscars need to. It's funny. They have a category for editing because they don't edit themselves. Talk about a metaphor for the night. The brutalist. It's brutal watching anything for three and a half hours, whether it's a film or an award show. Now, Anora sounds like it's a terrible name for a film. Anora, but I didn't hear. Is it a woman's name? What is it? Nora. It sounds like a car. I drive a Toyota Anora. You know, the shipping container. Dismisses Dan for asking Gary Owen a terrible question.

[Greg Cody]

Do you have a pop culture topic that everyone's seeking your opinion on these days? Any. A question that you're getting about what's happening in the news that is about one subject matter more than another?

[Billy Gill]

I mean, everybody's asking comedians about Diddy. That's. That's the big one right now.

[Dan Le Batard]

Dan. You don't get to make that face.

[Greg Cody]

Yeah, he warned me.

[Dan Le Batard]

Dan's question was like, hey, what's the pop culture thing? Everybody's asking you.

[Billy Gill]

All right, Talk about that. Everyone's mind went to Diddy, right? When Dan brought up the question, we're like, okay, you're asking him about Diddy and your opinion.

[Dan Le Batard]

Just ask him about Diddy.

[Greg Cody]

There were other choices he could be making.

[Billy Gill]

About terror. Scary.

[Dan Le Batard]

Look, See now, old man, over 20 years. I didn't think you could get worse at tossing things up to comedians, but yet here we are.

[Billy Gill]

Did he follow up or. David Sampson dismisses vow renewals. You don't get a gift. I'm not going to attend. I want no part of a vow renewal of any kind. I think it's absolute horse hockey. Personally, people. All right, you're in love. You're still married. What are you showing off? Because the rest of us are divorced. Oh, for my 25th anniversary, I'm going to renew my vows in Vegas. Give me a break. I'm totally out on vow renewals. I think it's ridiculous. Jonathan Zaslow dismisses Chris Whittingham's Panthers takes. We did. A month after the Panthers got eliminated from the playoffs on. Spencer Knight is better than Sergey. And somehow I have the wrong take on the Panthers. Somehow you have the wrong take. The Stanley cup champions. Somehow he got it. Murderer of fun. Over there. Okay. But I can admit that I was dead wrong. I was dead wrong, and I'm thrilled that I was dead wrong. You're sitting there saying how the Panthers got it wrong and they're the champions. Greg Cody dismisses Chris Cody. Christopher, what are you reading? I'm not used to seeing you read a book. What do you read other than menus? Wow. I did quite the dig.

[Dan Le Batard]

Did you just set yourself up?

[Billy Gill]

Wow.

[Greg Cody]

He set himself up for a joke.

[Billy Gill]

At the expense of his son.

[Greg Cody]

He threw himself an alley oop junk on his son with a fat cherry.

[Dan Le Batard]

I respect that.

[Billy Gill]

Thank you. Billy Gill dismisses Wayne Heisinger. Yeah, screw that guy. I love booing dead people. A bill.

[Greg Cody]

What?

[Dan Le Batard]

Such a weird.

[Billy Gill]

What?

[Greg Cody]

You love booing dead people.

[Billy Gill]

Yeah, I get the last laugh. You think you leave this earth and I'm going to forget about what you did. I will not. Katie Nolan dismisses Tom Brady's teeth. Those teeth he has are. Might be the wrong size for his mouth.

[Dan Le Batard]

I do wish he would.

[Billy Gill]

And I Googled it. You can have them. You can go back to the. The person who did them and be like, can you shave these down a little? And I think that that'd be in his best interest. I hear his teeth when he talks. Jonathan Zaslow dismisses emotional support animals. I don't want to hear about the dog being an emotional support animal, though. Like, that's garbage. Like, everybody has a dog to emotionally support you. You have a dog because having the dog makes you feel good. All right? That's everyone. So the fact that you could bring your dog anywhere because it's an emotional support animal, that's bullshit. Greg Cody dismisses people complaining about egg prices. I wander by the egg aisle. I see the eggs are, I think, $6.49 or $5.99 or something. Sizable hike warranted. Okay. Respect the chicken. They do a lot of work, you know, I mean, eggs. You can cook them four or five different ways. They're all great. Eggs have been underpriced for years. Let's quit complaining about the price of eggs. Billy Gill dismisses John Mulaney. Learn your place, Mulaney. You're not a sex symbol. Like, enough.

[Greg Cody]

Are you sure he's not a sex.

[Billy Gill]

Yeah, he's not supposed to be. I just. Stay in your lane. He's forcing it. Go write your jokes. Be your funny guy. Have that be your appeal. This sex symbol bull. Get out of here, Mulaney, please.

[Dan Le Batard]

He is married to Olivia Munn.

[Billy Gill]

Yeah, well, he was married to someone else before. Mike Ryan dismisses David Sampson's Marlins hall of Fame credentials. Do I think that when you look at important figures in the history of the franchise, am I in that conversation? I don't. I don't know how to argue against that.

[Greg Cody]

Let's. Let's.

[Dan Le Batard]

Allow me.

[Greg Cody]

Let's.

[Billy Gill]

So.

[Greg Cody]

So you killed baseball.

[Dan Le Batard]

In this market, you don't get to be in a Hall of Fame for killing baseball.

[Billy Gill]

I did not kill baseball. I saved baseball in the market. Actually, if there were a Hall of Fame killing baseball, you'd be first ballot. Pete Blackburn, AKA White Hat, dismisses Greg Cody for MC Overrated column. It's the laziest, stupidest, mailed in column that this guy probably hasn't watched a second of the Oilers this postseason.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's columnist behavior, though.

[Billy Gill]

I love that people like this exist, though. This is way lazier. This is. He's not making any sort of, like, coherent or strong point that you can agree with. Billy Gill dismisses Pete Blackburn. Who cares what Peter Blackburn thinks about anything? Yeah. Why are you guys here? Going to defend him over Greg Cody, who you've known for 20 years, so Peter Blackburn can come in your group chat and be like, thanks, guys, for having my back. I want to be your friend. I'm Peter Blackburn. Get out of here. Go to hell, Peter Blackburn.

[Greg Cody]

Thank you. You know what, Billy? I'm glad you finally.

[Billy Gill]

Where's the loyalty in this building? It's embarrassing. Bunch of star around here just wanting to get the big names to be your friends. Embarrassing.

[Greg Cody]

Billy, This. I will tell you what's happening.

[Billy Gill]

Peter Blackburn. What? Chaos.

[Dan Le Batard]

Excellent.

[Billy Gill]

What? What? Chaos is my question. Yeah. Spitting chick. Let's get out of here. We don't need two hockey podcasts in the world. World. Okay, Peter. Hey. The Hockey Show. That's the one in Men. Thank you. I guess we need two. The hockey show. Thank you. Billy Gill dismisses Matthew McConaughey. You're the naked bongo guy, right? You're not even a great actor, if we're gonna be perfectly honest. Like, all of a sudden, now you're gonna tell me how to behave as a family. Shut up. That's where you shush it up. Have you seen Interstellar? You're in Sing. You've seen Dallas Buyers Club? You're in Sing, too. Scott Van Pelt dismisses the TSA at the Atlanta airport. All there was was mayhem and lawlessness. Survival of the fittest. It was killer be killed. And did we. Did we break the line? I. Allegedly. I popped to all of this on the podcast that we did. We came in. Yes, we did. We came in a door. And where we came in, there were thousands of people, Ohio State, Notre Dame fans, all of whom were incredibly pleasant, by the way. I enjoyed meeting all of them in the three hours we stood the TSA line, waiting to get through. Go to the clear TSA line. They sure like, that's the sheet code. I don't know. No, I know where to go. There's nowhere to go. So I'm standing there and there's no. No one's helping. No red jackets helping. And we look and we say, this isn't going to work. And I'm like, wait, is this even a line? Let's go down there and see. And so we wandered down towards a different door where if you came in that door, you just blended into the line, because there wasn't a line. So that's what we did. That's against the law. Then I, you know. Chris Cody dismisses Josh Allen's PistaChio Farm the fourth quarter. Your little filler when we're down 21. I don't give a shit about Josh Allen's pistachio farm. Look at this thing. It's endless.

[Greg Cody]

I thought that that was fascinating. I had never given pistachio farms any thought before.

[Billy Gill]

Then who needs a pistachio farm? I just hated all of it. Just ridiculous. Get that thing out of my face. Least that's for, like, a Sunday pregame show on ESPN. That is not for fourth quarter when you're up 21 points. I'm reading a story here. He's doing it for a second income stream. I mean, please. Yeah, that's the most obnoxious story I've ever heard about a player. He has a pistachio. If you look now, he has a pistachio farm. His family business is forming out of here. Greg Cody dismisses Gary Furman.

[Greg Cody]

Am I wrong here when I say that Gary Fuhrman was one of the chief writers on a staff that would have been considered the best in America?

[Billy Gill]

America. No. No, you're not right. Chris Cody dismisses notaries. Are we still getting things notarized? Is that still a thing? Yeah, that was always a ridiculous thing. Yeah. My friend's mom's gonna stamp this paper. Now it's official. Yeah, yeah. You know Steven's mom. That's the difference here. Stupid process. Always. My whole life, I'm just like, what? I have to get this. What? Get it signed by something official. Courthouse. No, not a courthouse. Really, just Jack's mom. Your whole life, huh?

[Greg Cody]

Somebody with somebody who's got ink in and off.

[Billy Gill]

Now I can do so. Now I can go on this field trip because this has been notarized. You know, let me get one of those stamps. I'll be a notary.

[Greg Cody]

There's a process to do the process.

[Billy Gill]

You sign up $50, and all of.

[Greg Cody]

A sudden I'm a notary. No, you can't buy a stamp yet. I don't think it's a labyrinth either, but you have to fill out some paper.

[Billy Gill]

Look it up. Jeremy. I want to become a notary this week.

[Greg Cody]

Okay.

[Billy Gill]

Jessica Smatana dismisses Halloween in Miami. It's not spooky at all in Florida. It's 100 degrees. There's no giant. Giant skeletons. There's no jack O Lanterns. There's no little kids in costume. Just cafecito. It's hot all the time and it's not spooky. Oh, you're gonna trick or treat and get, like, heat stroke walking around your neighborhood, little kids, because it's Miami and it's so effing hot here and it sucks and it's not spooky. And no one has fake cobwebs on their shrubs because there's no. Everybody does. Everybody does. Never see. And it's not. It's not tricky at all. Where are the 12 foot skeletons? Go to a residential neighborhood. Go to a residential neighborhood. You don't live residential entire life. This feels like it's about more than Halloween. Billy.

[Greg Cody]

Unbelievable. Holy Billy. I did not realize that you had such a year. Like, it's. I don't. Bob Costas, you're. I saw you.

[Billy Gill]

I didn't dismiss Bob. Bob attacked me.

[Greg Cody]

If anything, I saw you squirming in your seat as. And squirming in your seat, but also with a giant smile on your face as you took out Bob Costas. And Bob Costas remembered the quote specifically on how it is you took him out and then gave you his resume.

[Billy Gill]

I. You want to know a story about that? That I got from a text from an insider. So we're friends with Adnan Virk, who works with Bob Costas at MLB Network. And I heard that afterwards that day, they were in the makeup room at MLB Network headquarters, and Bob Costas, like, turned to Adnan. Adnan's like, I heard you on the. On the show today, kind of. He's like, yeah, did you hear what I said about that kid? Or something like that. And Adnan's like, bob, I feel like he kind of proved his point, though, by going on that rant that you couldn't laugh at yourself. He's like, no, I scorched him. Him. Like, okay.

[Greg Cody]

Can you play that for me, please, Chris? Because I want Billy. I just. Please put the camera on. Just Billy. Because he was funny in the penalty box. To watch him sinking into his seat because he knows that this broadcast, he infuriated.

[Billy Gill]

This broadcast makes me happier than upsetting Legends. I gotta be honest with you. There's no people's time I like to waste more than important people. Especially self important people. Not that I'm saying that about Bob. No. One of your limited frame of reference peanut gallery guys said at one point, you know, I don't even know why he's called Bob. He's the kind of guy that really should have been, even in grade school would have demanded that he be called Robert. This is what happens when you don't know jack shit, okay? Saturday Night Live. Letterman, Leno, Carson, Conan, basketball, Pooty Tang, the paper. Yes. You know, if somebody knew as little, even if they were 20 years old, knew as little about baseball history and then was talking about last night's game with no frame of reference, they'd be laughed out of the room. You know, laughter, that kind of thing. That kind of thing. I love that part.

[Greg Cody]

You crushed that category. And I did not realize that we might have a challenger to a student got dismissal this year. So do you have a favorite? Does anyone have a favorite from among the dismissals? Because the way that he took out Europe was pretty fantastic and came out of nowhere and is exactly how the person who loves Disney World as much as Billy loves Disney World. It's how they attack old things, dude.

[Billy Gill]

I could visit all of Europe in one day at Disney World. Just go around Epcot and I could.

[Dan Le Batard]

Drink around the world, Parts of Asia as well.

[Billy Gill]

Five steps. Yeah, all around the world.

[Greg Cody]

Can you guys get for me again, please, the commercial for David Sampson that we played during one of the breaks here? Because David Sampson is actively pressing on, trying to bother people and enjoying the bothering of people. So I ask what you guys, what do you guys think of this intro for first ballot hall of Famer killed baseball in Miami.

[Billy Gill]

Hi, I'm David Samps. How would you like to sit down with me me and talk about success in business, which equals money. And I like money. And let's face it, there's a lot of guys in baseball who could learn a thing or two about money. I'll tell you how I went from a law school guy to a newspaper delivery guy to a wall street guy to baseball guy to a media guy. If you're smart, great. Maybe you can imitate me. If you're not, not take solace. You're just like nearly everybody else. So you want to talk business? Think of me as your only fans for rich guys.

[Greg Cody]

David, you know this. This is why people don't like you. You're like capitalism in human form. But if people like you and dislike you, then you really have a show.

[Billy Gill]

And I do have a show. Every Monday to Friday, 7am to 9am Eastern. Be there. It's fun. Five days a week. Nothing personal with David Sampson. He's so sinister who goes from law school to being a paper boy. It's a weird trajectory. Can we be honest? I feel like we honestly were heading the wrong direction till mommy got married. He works hard. Who said that?

[Dan Le Batard]

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