The Big Suey: Dave's Eloquent Chuck Norris Tribute (feat. A.J. Duhe)

Summary

The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

The Big Suey: Dave's Eloquent Chuck Norris Tribute (feat. A.J. Duhe)

Date: March 20, 2026

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Episode Overview

Broadcasting from the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, and their crew deliver a trademark blend of irreverent sports analysis and pop-culture commentary. This “Big Suey” features tournament talk (with a focus on college basketball’s opening weekend), some lively banter on sports clichés, bracket culture, and office camaraderie. The episode pivots to the passing of Chuck Norris, inspiring a comedic, heartfelt, and characteristically meandering “tribute.” The segment also includes a detour on college sports and an affectionate roast of sports media’s superficial expertise in March.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Inside the Local Sports Scene: Cyclones & Miami Canes (00:39–02:18)

• Event Hype: The crew discusses the Cyclones’ big game at Jam Arena, now at a new location. Stugotz walks listeners through the ticket process—with the usual comedic effect—and how to ensure a "perfect Friday" of South Florida sporting events: “You go to high Alai, watch the Cyclones do battle, then out to see the Miami Hurricanes tip off...It's actually perfect today.” (01:41)
• Scheduling Finesse: The hosts celebrate cunning scheduling, allowing attendance at back-to-back games.

2. March Madness: Surprises and Analysis (02:20–13:04)

• Biggest Day One Stories: Multiple upsets are covered. Jeremy singles out "the bansa getting bounced” and Arkansas’s dominance; Stugotz highlights VCU’s improbable comeback against North Carolina.
  • Notable Quote:
    • "It was all about VCU's comeback against North Carolina...just truly awful basketball to watch." — Stugotz (04:19)
• Coaching Watch: UNC’s Hubert Davis is scrutinized for the blown lead and his candid yet evasive postgame answers (09:34–11:13).
  • Quote:
    • “What do you mean?” — Tony, playing Hubert Davis fielding a postgame question (10:30)
• Duke’s Close Call: The crew discusses Duke nearly losing to #16 seed Siena, with player Malik Brown and coach Jon Scheyer admitting they expected a "cakewalk."
  • Quote:
    • "It's so easy to point to the coach. You didn’t have these guys ready." — Dan (12:26)
• Psychology of Upsets: Dave Damashek discusses team ego and the “curse of supposed to.”
  • Quote:
    • “It’s an extra burden on your shoulders when you’re expected to do it, when you’re supposed to win. There is not like, we did it ... it’s like, whew, thank goodness we got by that team that we were way better than.” (20:09)

3. Language & Sports Clichés: The “Cakewalk” Debate (15:27–18:39)

• Origin of “Cakewalk”: The phrase prompts an impromptu etymological exploration and discussion about updating language for modern sensibilities.
  • Quote:
    • "It's actually kind of racist." — Stugotz, of “cakewalk” (15:30)
    • “Survive in advance...better that you didn’t take your opponent serious against the 16 than get to the Sweet 16 and you’re not taking your opponent serious.” — Dan (15:38)
• Meta-Humor: The crew pokes fun at their own on-air blunders and the difficulty of breaking old language habits.

4. Tournament Culture & Bracket Rituals (32:46–39:54)

• Bracket FOMO: Debate about filling out brackets when most fans have little knowledge of the teams.
  • Quote:
    • "I feel like a pretentious ass trying to scratch out some team names when I really don't know very much about the players." — Dave Damashek (33:04)
• Stugotz's Redemption: After years of not filling out brackets, Stugotz is engaged this year—"I'm rejuvenated as a sportsman." (35:11)
• Mockery of Sports Media: The crew mockingly exposes the lack of in-depth knowledge behind many “expert” brackets, lampooning Colin Cowherd’s bracket picks.
  • Quote:
    • "Nobody knows anything about any of these college basketball teams. Why? Because college basketball ... is on the steep decline and has been for the last 20 years." — Dave Damashek (39:54)

5. Notable Stats & Calls (21:05–23:28)

• Stat of the Day: High Point’s Chase Johnston had not made a two-point basket all season until he hit a game-winning layup.
  • Quote:
    • "No wonder he hit the game-winning layup. He started, he came inside the three point line. They didn’t know what to do." — Dan (22:12)
• Viral Student Broadcast: The student call of High Point’s upset win is celebrated for its infectious joy and spontaneity.
  • Quote:
    • "That guy ... survived. Nay, he thrived. Great job." — Dave Damashek (25:29)

6. Chuck Norris Tribute: Humor Meets Reverence (27:16–32:46)

• Announcement: Stugotz breaks the news of Chuck Norris’s death (86) with trademark awkwardness, prompting the titular “eloquent” (i.e., delightfully clumsy) tribute from Dave Damashek.
  • Quote:
    • "A.J. Duhe, your Dolphins legend. Three career interceptions in the regular season, three in the AFC title game ... Now that's a wild stat of something that never ... and then he does it three times in one game." — Dave (28:07)
  • Meta-Joke:
    • "Touching words. Really a really poignant tribute, Dave." — Stugotz (28:44)
• Chuck Norris’s Legacy: The crew salutes Norris’s career arc from B-movie action star, to “Walker, Texas Ranger,” to meme legend—thanks in part to Conan O’Brien’s recurring bits.
  • Quote:
    • "He became more famous than ever because of the Internet. He was an Internet age celebrity. He became kind of one of the first memes ever." — Stugotz (31:29)
  • Favorite Chuck Norris Moments: Multiple hosts share favorite Norris moments from pop culture and personal nostalgia, from “Sidekicks” to his on-screen martial arts credentials.

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Notable Quotes & Moments by Timestamp

• Stugotz on Friday sports plans:
  "It's a perfect Friday night. You go to high Alai, watch the Cyclones do battle, stroll on out and you watch the Miami Hurricanes tip off at 10:10. It's actually perfect." (01:41)
• Dave Damashek, tournament philosophy:
  "Even if we like Cinderella stories, what makes Cinderella stories is an established bully. We need Duke to survive." (08:42)
• Dan on Hubert Davis's postgame:
  "I mean, he's asked what do you think went wrong. His answer is what do you mean? Well, Hubert, you know, it's first game and you're done." (10:54)
• Discussion on overconfidence:
  "It's an extra burden on your shoulders when you're expected to do it, when you're supposed to win. That does add a certain gravity ..." — Dave Damashek (20:09)
• Roasting Colin Cowherd’s bracket:
  "How can he have Michigan State losing and then advancing to the Final Four?" — Dan (39:18)
• Norris tribute meta-gag:
  "Touching words. Really a really poignant tribute, Dave." — Stugotz (28:44)
• On Chuck Norris as a meme:
  "He became more famous than ever because of the Internet. He was an Internet age celebrity. He became kind of one of the first memes ever." — Stugotz (31:29)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Cyclones game/South Florida events: 00:39–02:18
• Tournament recap & UNC/VCU drama: 02:20–07:16
• Duke scare + “cakewalk” cliché & reflection: 09:34–18:39
• High Point stat & viral call: 21:05–25:29
• Chuck Norris news/tribute: 27:16–32:46
• Bracket talk & Cowherd roast: 32:46–39:54

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Tone & Language

The episode is playful, spontaneous, and peppered with sarcasm, meta-commentary, and inside jokes. Sports takes veer from superficial to pointed, and even solemn news (Norris's death) is filtered through the show’s blend of irreverence and nostalgia. The dialogue features plenty of room for missteps and self-mockery—especially spotlighting the superficiality and theater of March Madness expertise.

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Summary Takeaway

This “Big Suey” episode delivers everything fans expect from Le Batard & crew: shambolic but sharp takes on major tournaments, a healthy mockery of sports punditry, office bracket tradition, and an offbeat pop culture tribute. The mix of debate, humor, and genuine affection for the absurdities of both sports and broadcasting is on full display—cementing the show’s unique place in the sports-media landscape.

Transcript

[Dan Le Batard]

Welcome to the Big Sui presented by DraftKings.

[Tony]

Why are you listening to this show,

[Dan Le Batard]

the podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast?

[Stugats]

I'm sorry.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm not going to apologize for that.

[Stugats]

In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.

[Tony]

I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries that if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.

[Dave Damashek]

I've done it.

[Dan Le Batard]

And now here's the marching man to Nowhere, Fat Face and the Habitual Liar.

[Mike]

This episode of the Dan Levitzard show is presented by DraftKings.

[Stugats]

DraftKings.

[Mike]

The Crown is yours, Mike.

[Dan Le Batard]

What do we got going on tonight? Big night for the Cyclones.

[Stugats]

Yeah, I want to actually inform the audience we are back in action tonight. It's a brand new arena, brand new location. The Jam arena at Casino Miami. It is still free entry, but if you just walk up expecting to get in free and you want GA tickets, it'll be $5 up there at the box office. But you can get free tickets by going to jmarina.com and using the promo code FRIDAY5OFF. I believe that's the one, right, Chris? FRIDAY5OFF. When you check out, then it costs you $0 and you can watch the defending fall champion Cyclones take the court today.

[Mike]

Hopefully bounce back.

[Stugats]

We're playing Udonis Haslam's team today, the Renegade, where it's Manu versus Gocheri. That's always a great matchup. Two of the best players in the world.

[Dan Le Batard]

Everyone knows that's a big matchup.

[Stugats]

UD usually shows up. I don't appreciate the sarcastic laugh over there. Trailing from one, Mr. Dave Damoshek.

[Dave Damashek]

Well, no, Zaslo's just delightful. That's all. That's all.

[Stugats]

Zazzo knows this. Zazzle knows. Zazo knows as a member of the Dan LeBatard show, he is also part my owner of the Cyclones. So we're taking the court today and first sauce is at 7 o'. Clock. So if you want a perfect Friday night, you go to high Alai, you watch the Cyclones do battle, you stroll on out and you watch the Miami Hurricanes tip off at 10 10. It's actually perfect today.

[Jeremy]

Criminal time for the heat.

[Stugats]

I kind of vibe with it on a Friday night. Especially because I get to watch my highlight. Yeah, it'd be a real tricky situation for me if the games were happening at the same exact time. But I go from Cyclones right into Canes basketball. It's perfect.

[Dave Damashek]

Very good.

[Dan Le Batard]

A lot of tournament to get to from yesterday, which of course. Brings us to tonight. We have a few games that are of interest. How about tonight at 7:35pm Eastern? In the west region we have number two, Purdue, the Big Ten tournament champion. They are represented by Jonathan Zaslow.

[Dave Damashek]

Looks like he says, uh, oh, spaghettio. When he sees someone pulled over.

[Jeremy]

You say that?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, apparently I do.

[Stugats]

Oh, Spaghettio.

[Dan Le Batard]

And they are facing 15 seed queens represented by Nick Wright.

[Dave Damashek]

Looks like Adam Driver if he wore his Kylo Ren helmet for a month straight.

[Dan Le Batard]

I like that one. Also tonight, 9:45pm Eastern time, east region number four, Kansas. They're represented by Mario Cristobal.

[Dave Damashek]

Looks like he disapproves of his daughter's choice.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, I think we could all see that. Yeah. And they are facing number 13, Cal Baptist. Being represented by Vikings head coach Kevin OConnell.

[Dave Damashek]

Looks like he fundamentally disagrees with everything you're saying.

[Dan Le Batard]

So if I asked you, Tony, yesterday, out of all the action that took place in the tournament, the biggest story after day one was what?

[Jeremy]

Ooh, I'd probably say the bansa getting bounced was a. Was a big story.

[Dan Le Batard]

He was awesome.

[Jeremy]

He was great. And that's why, like, I think that that's such a pivotal thing in March where you have these guys that kind of like make their name getting ready for the NBA draft.

[Dave Damashek]

That's BYU, right?

[Roy]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Darius Acuff Jr. Was great. Arkansas looks like a, like just a steamroller in that conference.

[Stugats]

Did you watch Sean Miller's in game interview when he was asked how do you slow down the banto?

[Jeremy]

No. What'd you say?

[Stugats]

I don't believe we can.

[Jeremy]

Sean Miller's great, but I think that that was a big story. Trying to think what else. O high point game was awesome. The kid shooting from the logo was insane. I love that guy. He actually hit a layup.

[Stugats]

Guys, it was all about VCU's comeback against North Carolina. North Carolina had that game done and dusted and VCU just would not quit. Full court pressure making that happen. It was a heinous overtime. It was just truly awful basketball to watch.

[Dan Le Batard]

No one scored until, I think about two minutes left in the overtime.

[Stugats]

But it was dramatic. I mean, everyone expected that to be a good game. And then North Carolina, North Carolina was dominating that. And now you take a look at Hubert Davis. I know John Fanta told us Hubert Davis wasn't coaching for his job. There have been whispers around Chapel Hill when you blow a game in that fashion, it is curious to see what's going to happen there. And we got Kentucky later today. I'm worried, Zaz. The doomsday clock is inching closer to midnight.

[Dan Le Batard]

Okay, but if we're talking unc, because we did bring this up yesterday about Hubert Davis possibly coaching for his job. I brought it up last night on ESPN radio as well. Like, I think there's something to it. And like the game was going on while I was on the air last night. I'm talking about Hubert Davis. And then they wind up losing. They blow the 19 point lead. Jay Lucas being recruited potentially by UNC does. I mean, look, he's going to take whatever big job he can get? Does he care at all that it's UNC if they were to come after him? I mean, unc, Duke, that's what I'm talking about.

[Stugats]

Yeah, I mean, I don't think that that plays into whatsoever.

[Dave Damashek]

I.

[Stugats]

Look, Jay Lucas, if North Carolina or Kentucky call you, you're going to listen, right? You're just going to listen. In that sport, you have to. But I, in my heart of hearts, I believe Jay Lucas is building something nice over here. We already know what the ceiling can be for Miami. An elite eight followed by a final four. This can be a special place. And one year in. Jay Lucas already had one of the best regular seasons ever. He's at 37 years old, a great recruiter. He's certainly, certainly going to be near the top or at the top of these lists, but I'm holding out hope. He's already got a five star commitment coming in next year. And it's not like, just trust me, bro, in the transfer portal. He's got proof of concept now and he knows that he can develop players. Look what he's done with guys like Uday and Donaldson. These, these are guys that have really developed here into potentially like NBA players.

[Jeremy]

He's an awesome coach and we'll see what happens. Like, it's a trust the process kind of situation. Like he's building something, like you said. But when the big boys call, you got to listen. Speaking of the big boys, you mentioned Duke. I thought that was an interesting game yesterday too. Sienna gave him all that they could handle. Yeah, and Carl, Carlos, the other boozer? No. Well, Kaden actually played well, but Campbell

[Stugats]

playing real well lately, did not look great.

[Jeremy]

A lot of. A lot of fumbling the ball, a lot of turnovers, a lot of like, weird plays where he couldn't get anything.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, but, but he was. I mean, he was just crushing them on the glass.

[Stugats]

Sure.

[Anderson]

He.

[Stugats]

He asserted it as well. Dave, I. You're a student of the game. I Don't think I can remember an NCAA tournament game in which a starting five played the entire game. Jerry McNamara. That's right. That Jerry McNamara as a head coach at Sienna, he didn't sub out any of.

[Dave Damashek]

Yeah, I think the. The Hackman's Huskers maybe attempted that at the high school level, but I don't think I've ever seen it in college. Although I will say Bob Knight had an iron five that he rolled through and remained in the top five throughout. As an Indiana Hoosiers graduate, I have to shout that out. And by the way, you mentioned the Canes. I know you're a basketball school more than a football school, but you really did a great job with that playoff run last year. Came up a little bit short, but don't hang your heads about that. I think the thing more globally with college basketball, we're. We're largely. I don't think we want to acknowledge it because we all enjoy March Madness. I think you, everybody, you're. You. You're just surviving. You're. You ain't living. If you ain't in a bar as soon as this show ends and getting drunk on the man's clock while you're at work, if you sit in a cubicle all day, every day for 365 or something close to it, if you ain't escaping the office to go and throw on a good drunk while watching student athletes today, what are you doing? This is time to live, everybody. And what's further, it's important. Even if we like Cinderella stories, what makes Cinderella stories is an established bully. We need Duke to survive. It's bad that UNC lost. You want Kentucky to win because then you really are just. We're already just rooting for brands at this point. That's what we're reacting to when everybody fills out their brackets. All we really know, deep down, if you're being honest with the man in the mirror, very few of us really know much about who these guys are at this point because nil and because they're onto the NBA if they're worth their salt in terms of basketball. So I think it all amounts to. Enjoy your Cinderella storage. But really, if you want your brackets and otherwise, if you want college basketball to be relevant, you want the. The recognizable team brands to survive into the sweet 16 and beyond.

[Dan Le Batard]

So I, I don't think Hubert Davis is going to lose his job. I, I think this was his fifth year. He's had one Final Four appearance, no national championships. He's a tremendous recruiter, which is Likely what has him keep his job. He has the out where Caleb Wilson didn't play. So I don't think he actually loses his job. But they blow a 19 point lead yesterday to VCU. UNC looked horrible late in the game and in overtime. Here's Hubert Davis post game. Hubert was brutal in his postgame session.

[Stugats]

Got a little bit tired there.

[Tony]

I did not. I didn't.

[Stugats]

Hubert, why did you go to just a six man rotation in the second half?

[Tony]

Because that was my decision.

[Dan Le Batard]

Coach, what did you generally. What do you think went wrong?

[Tony]

What do you mean?

[Dan Le Batard]

Hubert, the free throws again, as you mentioned, a little bit of an issue tonight. Why do you think that was such an issue for your team throughout the season?

[Tony]

That's a great question. I mean we work on them and.

[Stugats]

Hubert Davis did work in media.

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean he's asked what do you think went wrong? His answer is what do you mean? Well, Hubert, you know, it's first game and you're done.

[Jeremy]

You had a 19 point lead and you're not winning.

[Stugats]

You're North Carolina. That's where the question's coming from.

[Dan Le Batard]

You didn't make the second round. I think that's what I mean. What went wrong?

[Stugats]

You were up big and then you lost. What do you mean?

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean, come on. It's disingenuous, Hubert. So, so then you have Duke, who loves UNC losing not just because they're huge rivals, but it's like, okay, that's not the biggest story anymore. Duke almost losing to Sienna. Did you see this? So Duke is down by nine. I think it was at halftime. They ended up trailing by 13 early in the second half. Duke is down by nine at halftime. And listen to this. This is Duke forward Malik Brown and Tracy Wolfson has him, you know, for the, the halftime interview there. Again, Duke is down by nine to number 16, Sienna. Here's Malik Brown. What did Shire tell you in the locker room?

[Stugats]

Oh, yeah, obviously we weren't playing our basketball. Just like I said, we thought it was going to be a kick while going into this game. So now we know what it is and we just got resp. Way we usually do.

[Dan Le Batard]

So Malik Brown, he talks about how they thought it was going to be a cake cakewalk. And Cameron Boozer after the game said something similar to. And I'll tell you, like they're kind of throwing Jon Schier onto the bus there because whether it's true or not, they make it sound like. Like it's an easy way to say that your coach didn't prepare you for the game, whether it's true or not.

[Roy]

It's the first thing that John Shire said after the game when you say,

[Dan Le Batard]

we thought it was going to be a cakewalk. It's so easy to point to the coach. You didn't have these guys ready.

[Roy]

But he said it. It was like the first thing he said in his post game interview, I was shocked by it, was that he was like, I didn't have them ready to play. He out coached me. And I'm just proud of our guys for coming out with the mentality in the second half that they could win this game because I got out coached and I didn't have them ready.

[Jeremy]

Well, we could tell early. We could tell early because they were sleepwalking through the first half or you were like, wait a second, Duke's going to turn it on at some point, right? They have this great player in boozer. All of a sudden it's like, they're down 9, they're down 11, they're down 13. Where's this team? This is not the team that we thought was the number one seed.

[Stugats]

Hey, Roy, buddy.

[Dave Damashek]

Yo.

[Stugats]

You know that energy shift when the game gets good and everybody all together in unison knows to stand up on their feet?

[Dave Damashek]

Oh, absolutely.

[Stugats]

Mike.

[Dave Damashek]

Yeah.

[Stugats]

You've been at many big time sporting events. You know that moment quite well. That's what it's like when you take your first sip of Cuervo.

[Jeremy]

Oh, delicious.

[Stugats]

It's the signal that says, we're not checking the time anymore, pal. It's when small talk turns into stories. Cuervo, man. It's that high five. A random stranger effect. That's right. The game is popping. You're hugging people you never met before. That's the kind of energy that Cuervo brings. It's so smooth, so delicious. That's the Cuervo effect. Keep it Cuervo,

[DraftKings Announcer]

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[Dan Le Batard]

You're kind of like me.

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[Dan Le Batard]

I do.

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[Stugats]

Don LeBatard.

[Dan Le Batard]

I've never stepped foot on that campus. If you told me, right now, your life depends on it. Go to Santa Fe University and just. Just. Just take a picture.

[Stugats]

Stugats.

[Dan Le Batard]

I would die. I don't know where it is.

[Stugats]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the ST. Also.

[Dave Damashek]

What is a cakewalk?

[Mike]

I was wondering.

[Stugats]

Oh, it's. It's actually kind of racist. Yeah, yeah, We've done this before.

[Dave Damashek]

Oh, good. Then we continue to use it.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think. I think it's one of those deals where it's survive in advance. Like, I don't. I don't look at it and say, oh, well, Duke.

[Jeremy]

This is not a bigger issue for you? For Duke?

[Dan Le Batard]

See, I take the perspective of better. You didn't take your opponent serious against the 16, then get to the sweet 16, and you're not taking your opponent serious because that team could be, like, an eight or a nine seed, and if you don't take them serious, you're gonna wind up losing. Like, I don't think Duke is gonna have another game this tournament.

[Jeremy]

They play TCU next, where they didn't

[Dan Le Batard]

take their opponents serious. They did that, and they were down 13 in the second half.

[Stugats]

So Jeremy's face looks like he just discovered he's been uttering a. Yeah, I'm not going to. I'm not going to say cakewalk anymore. You just did.

[Roy]

I did.

[Stugats]

Why is it race but for what It's. This is educational because, like, look, it's like. It's like saying master bedroom these days. Like, you should probably correct that.

[Roy]

And I will say, in this case, it does seem as though the cakewalk was a bit of a form of protest, because according to the AI Overview, which we know is always right, the cakewalk originated in the late 19th century as a dance created by enslaved African Americans on Southern plantations. That's where I first went.

[Colin Cowherd]

Ooh.

[Roy]

But it said it was designed to satirize the elegant manners and formal dances of white plantation owners. So, in a sense, this is maybe not as bad as we originally. Still want to say it, huh?

[Dave Damashek]

Yeah. Come on, man. I mean, I'm not gonna say it.

[Dan Le Batard]

Why do you want to say it so bad?

[Dave Damashek]

Whisper attache.

[Stugats]

And in your defense, Dave got us started on this.

[Dave Damashek]

Don't you put this on me. I didn't know there was.

[Stugats]

You.

[Dan Le Batard]

You said it.

[Jeremy]

You asked for it.

[Dave Damashek]

I made a mistake. I wasn't aware what. The mistake Zaslow seems to be making here is, like, eternally. Don't you know that a heavily favored team doesn't take its foe seriously? I think it's interesting that a student athlete says that into a microphone, but that's. That's the. The eternal battle, isn't it, that. How do we get right for a game where we know that if we show up for it, we obviously are going to smoke this team, but how do we get up for a team that we know that we're way better than? I mean, I guess I think it's an interesting inflection point. Yeah.

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean, obviously, that attitude is very prevalent during a regular season game. All right. But when. When you're in the NCAA tournament, that game yesterday is. Is. It's literally Sienna's championship. Like, Sienna's not going into the tournament saying, maybe we're gonna make a run. We go win this thing. Like, no, Sienna is trying to beat Duke in the first round of the tournament. And if they do, it's an all time moment for the school. It's. It is their championship. And that's why, like, you can't just say, it's gonna be a cakewalk. I said it for you.

[Dave Damashek]

Yeah, but you have a big ego as a. As a, you know, Power 5 college basketball player and all of that, so you can't really, if you try to deny your confidence that obviously we're better than this team is, we should kill Sienna. It. It is a weird sort of paradox that as a team, you have to overcome. Right. Like, obviously, if we show up, we're gonna kill this team, but let's not be overconfident about it. Right? I mean, obviously, that's what these coaches talk about forever.

[Jeremy]

But, Dave, that's like the rolling out the ball theory. Like, we roll out the ball in the court, we're better than them no matter what. We don't really need a coach. That's kind of the ethos behind it. But then you have somebody on the side that is playing for their championship and playing for their. For their eternal lives. A lot of these guys are probably never going to sniff professional basketball outside of what they're playing at this moment. And it's like, all right, we're going to try to give everything we have to a team that has some flaws in Duke. Right. Like, I. I didn't love the way Cam Boozer played. Right. He's supposed to be a top three, top five pick.

[Stugats]

And I was like, I. I don't

[Jeremy]

love that he's not super athletic right now. He's looking kind of slow.

[Stugats]

And really, I mean, the commentators.

[Jeremy]

You came back, you came out of that game thinking, cam Boozer has it all.

[Stugats]

Yeah, I. I really. I mean, he could have dominated. Yeah, the commentators were like, this guy dominated this game.

[Dan Le Batard]

He did.

[Jeremy]

I mean, I'd hope he dominated against 16 Sienna.

[Roy]

He.

[Jeremy]

I saw him do a lot of mistakes. I saw him get. Get stuck in a lot of double teams that he should have passed out of quicker. Like, there was a lot of things where I looked at and I was like, he's not as athletic as I thought he was going to be.

[Dave Damashek]

Well, not against Sienna, but. The curse of supposed to that I talk about all the time is a legitimate plague. It's an extra burden on your shoulders when you're expected to do it, when you're supposed to win. That does add a certain gravity to your side of things. There's. There's only sorrow in losing. I mean. I mean, devastation or. And only relief in victory. There is not like, we did it. Celebrate, Rejoice. Rah, Rah. It's like, whew, thank goodness we got by that team that we were way better than.

[Dan Le Batard]

Did you know, Yesterday, Nebraska. Nebraska beat Troy. It's their first ever tournament victory. And with Nebraska's win yesterday, they became the last power four conference team to win a tournament game.

[Jeremy]

Really?

[Dan Le Batard]

They were the only power four conference school to never have won an NCAA tournament game. And they beat Troy.

[Jeremy]

They took that ass, too.

[Dan Le Batard]

They did take that ass. So finally here, the other highlight of yesterday is going to bring us to stat of the Day, which Jeremy has for us here.

[Colin Cowherd]

Start of the day, Start of the day it is the start of the day Start of the day Start of the day it is the start of the day Start of the day Start of the day it is the start of the day Start of the day Start of the day it is the start of the day

[Mike]

this stat of the day is presented by money Lion Download the Money lion app or visit moneylion.com to learn more. Money lion make money easy.

[Roy]

High points chase Johnston, number 99 was 64 for 132. So good from three point land going into yesterday. He was 0 for 4 in two point range going into yesterday. So good until he hit the game winning layup in the final seconds.

[Jeremy]

That kind of rimmed into.

[Dan Le Batard]

I mean no wonder he hit the game winning layup. He started, he came inside the three point line. They didn't know what to do.

[Roy]

It was unbelievable. I will say maybe not a perfect layup. The grace to be able to on the break in the final seconds of the game, lay in a finger roll like that when you haven't made a

[Dan Le Batard]

two point shot all year long.

[Roy]

That like.

[Jeremy]

I'd like to track those two point shots by the way. Of the four, the four, where were they from?

[Dan Le Batard]

Foot on the line, toe on the wall. That's.

[Jeremy]

Was it like a great question? Was it a step in? Maybe he faked in and stepped in.

[Roy]

I'm gonna try to. I'm like a dog with a bone on this.

[Jeremy]

His like he looked like Steph Curry out there though. Like he was taking shots that were ultimate neon green light.

[Dan Le Batard]

Dave, super entrance.

[Jeremy]

Dave, did you see the shot that a guy, I don't know who it was on their team took about three dribbles into half court, turned around, gave him the ball and then he shot it leaning in from the logo and drilled it. Dave Damaschek.

[Dave Damashek]

Excellent. I love that, that, that stat though, that that same guy somehow made it through an entire season.

[Dan Le Batard]

How's that even possible?

[Dave Damashek]

To spend that amount of time on the floor and not fall into an offensive rebound on the, on the wrong side of the rim and just throw it. That never happened in 30 something games and now it did happen in that spot. Wild all time wild stat.

[Dan Le Batard]

It was a great finish. High points. They, they come back, they win that game, they send Wisconsin home. Typical, you know, it's your typical 125 upset. It seems to happen every season and high points advances. But I don't know if you saw this Dave. So high points student broadcast. They have a play by play guy and they have a color analyst, all right. And they're sitting there courtside at the game. And this video of these two students calling. It's. It's High Point University student radio. These two kids calling the final moments. It's the best thing you're going to see today.

[Anderson]

Anderson driving. Step back in circles now. Johnson, catch and shoot. Oh, James Justin, that's what they needed.

[Dan Le Batard]

Time out.

[Anderson]

Time out, Portland. Do you believe it? Here comes Justin. The layup. Johnson and transition takes it in bounds. Nine seconds. Boyd wants it inside. Try six seconds. And Boyd. They launch down court banners. That gets it. Throw on the glass slipper. It's a Cinderella story in Portland, Oregon for the first time in program history. High point breaks through and we will see you in the round of 30.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's a great call. It's really good too.

[Jeremy]

Good for him, dude. Good for him.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's really good. I mean, obviously, like he sounds like a student, but Dave, it's a great call too.

[Dave Damashek]

Yes, Kudos to him. That's the takeaway. Yes. The fandom and everything else. Yes. He nailed that call. That's the big spot and he came through in it. You never know how you're going to do in the in a pressure packed moment until you're in it. And that guy is a play by play. Guy survived. Nay, he thrived. Great job.

[Anderson]

What a feeling.

[Dan Le Batard]

Tonight at 10pm Eastern Time in the east region as we continue on with our. Looks like we have number two, Yukon being represented by Adam Silver.

[Dave Damashek]

Looks like a newly opened chapstick.

[Dan Le Batard]

They are facing number 15. Furman represented by Adam Silver, Looks like a torpedo bat.

[Jeremy]

Oh, that's a really good one.

[Stugats]

How's that?

[Jeremy]

Fifteen?

[Dan Le Batard]

Remember the biggest story this time last year? The torpedo bats.

[Stugats]

Like what are these bats? They're torpedoes.

[Dan Le Batard]

Is it cheating?

[Roy]

Yeah, that was the question.

[Dan Le Batard]

The Yankees, they're cheating with their torpedo bats.

[Stugats]

Don LeBatard.

[Tony]

No one else here is willing to do a trump or a biden.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's not true, Dan.

[Tony]

Okay, Tony, you can catch a thousand impersonations.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's not bad, man.

[Stugats]

Finally.

[Dan Le Batard]

Pretty good.

[Stugats]

Stugach.

[Jeremy]

Yours is terrible.

[Dan Le Batard]

You just gotta get a little redder, a little pinker.

[Stugats]

You're right there, man.

[Tony]

Yours is not that you're biting.

[Stugats]

What do you mean? Oh, his is good.

[Dan Le Batard]

That's actually not bad. That's not terrible. We gotta come together.

[Stugats]

A little southern, little bush.

[Dan Le Batard]

A little George Bush in that one.

[Stugats]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats.

[Dan Le Batard]

I don't know if you guys saw this and then I, I want. Mike, I want to get to the canes for tonight. In a moment here, but

[Stugats]

this is heartbreaking to report to you and our audience. Chuck Norris has passed away. It was reported yesterday that he was in Hawaii. He was rushed to the hospital. And TMZ has reported that the legendary Chuck Norris, he was like 90, right? TV star, movie star. He was 86, I believe. And pop culture sensation. Everyone got swept away with Chuck Norris. Facts. He has passed away. I'm sorry.

[Dave Damashek]

Wow.

[Mike]

I didn't mean to laugh there. It's just like awkward silence after that.

[Stugats]

Well, I had to fill the. I. We see now Jeremy has filled awkward silence. I don't. I don't think that that was the right call.

[Dave Damashek]

So I. I'm going to fill it with this. A random stat that I think is fascinating is. That's what I was just looking up there for, the wildest stat. AJ Dewey, your Dolphins legend. Three career interceptions in the regular season, three interceptions in the AFC title game off the right arm of Dick Todd in the New York jets stats to advance David Woodley and company to the super bowl, where they lost ultimately to John Riggins and that Washington team. What? Now that's a wild stat of something that never. AJ Dewey never intercepts the ball, and then he does it three times in one game.

[Mike]

Sheesh.

[Stugats]

Touching words. Really. A really poignant tribute, Dave. Really poignant tribute.

[Dan Le Batard]

You know what he would try as a guy?

[Dave Damashek]

Yeah, you.

[Stugats]

You really nailed it.

[Dan Le Batard]

Come on. What do you want?

[Dave Damashek]

All right, go ahead, please. The floor is yours. Right. You give an AJ Dewey stat, the man's dead.

[Dan Le Batard]

Nice. About Chuck Norris.

[Stugats]

Yeah. I would have gone Delta Force personally, but Dick Todd. Fine.

[Dave Damashek]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

You know what?

[Dave Damashek]

Tip of the cap to Conan o' Brien for making Chuck Norris more relevant with his. His recurring bit about Walker, Texas Ranger. Because that was hysterical.

[Mike]

When I think of Chuck Norris, I think of Stu Gotts asking this iconic question.

[Stugats]

All right, we're going to see whether these.

[Dan Le Batard]

Any of these here can crack Chuck Norris's top 10.

[Stugats]

Now, your favorite involves the Tyrannosaurus rex.

[Dan Le Batard]

You want to do yours? Yeah. That Chuck Norris was tracing the Tyrannosaurus rex.

[Dave Damashek]

The rex was not chasing the Jeep.

[Stugats]

Okay. In Jurassic Park.

[Dan Le Batard]

Way to screw that up. I kind of blindsided.

[Colin Cowherd]

I didn't know you were throwing.

[Dave Damashek]

That's my fault. What?

[Dan Le Batard]

It was.

[Dave Damashek]

Way to deliver that one. Good to start that way.

[Mike]

Man, Dan sounds so young.

[Jeremy]

Whose voice is that?

[Stugats]

That is an ancient clip now. Everyone sounds young. Chuck Norris is dead. I can't believe that this is one of those guys that you just thought would live forever. Means 86 years old. It's kind of Chuck Norris.

[Dave Damashek]

Chuck Norris was in the water in one of those missing in action pictures that he did. He did multiples. He kept going back across the Pacific to retrieve his brethren, and one time he's down in the water with one of those Big machine guns, the giant kind like Jesse Ventura might have. And he's hidden in the watch. Then he pops up shooting the gun. I don't know if that would work in real life, but it was a pretty cool looking shot, that's for sure.

[Stugats]

That is a much better appropriate.

[Jeremy]

See, that's.

[Colin Cowherd]

Good job.

[Dan Le Batard]

Do it.

[Stugats]

Yeah. My favorite Chuck Norris thing outside of Walker, Texas Ranger, because I loved Walker, Texas Ranger. I used to watch it with my grandparents when I was a kid. And then I was a big Conan fan and yeah, I love those clips. But the movie Sidekicks.

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, that's what I'm thinking of.

[Stugats]

Yeah. Not three ninjas. Nor is it three Ninjas kicks kickback, but Sidekicks with Jonathan Brandis, which was a movie that was sort of paying homage to Chuck Norris's entire career where Jonathan Brandis would have these fantastical daydreams where he was put into Chuck Norris's greatest movies. That film was one of my favorites when I was a little kid. And this is sad. This guy was a huge sensation. And even after the prime of his career, he became more famous than ever because of the Internet. He was an Internet age celebrity. He became kind of one of the first memes ever.

[Dan Le Batard]

So is JJ.

[Dave Damashek]

Dewey Number 77? Weird number for a linebacker, but go ahead.

[Dan Le Batard]

Is Walker Texas Ranger like the obvious? This was his greatest role. Movie tv?

[Stugats]

I believe so. I mean, he had the scene with Bruce Lee and he was a huge B action movie. I think that's fair. I don't mean that as an insult, but lower budget action movie star.

[Dan Le Batard]

Was it on right before Monday night?

[Dave Damashek]

No, those Michigan action movies were big at the time.

[Stugats]

Really? I don't. Yeah, like the prime of his silver screen career was a little before my time. To the point that like his big movie was like my entire career is canon. But he was. Yeah, he was an Internet celebrity and an actual celebrity. Tough as nails, too. Tough as nails or legit bona fides. Not like those contrived martial arts stars.

[Dan Le Batard]

Who are the contrived martial arts stars?

[Jeremy]

Yeah. Say their names.

[Stugats]

Well, I. Look, I'm a little afraid of them, but we've seen it. We've seen what he's done when he's swarmed by 12 Russians. But the Steven Seagal. A little casual flip there. Yeah, I don't. I would have loved to have seen a fight there. I think Chuck Norris goes over.

[Dan Le Batard]

So I don't know if you guys saw this yesterday. Everybody fills out brackets, right? Anyone felt. Dave, do you fill up one bracket or multiple brackets?

[Dave Damashek]

I Think this is going to reveal me as an awful curmudgeon. I did zero practice this year. Zero practice, was it?

[Stugats]

So you don't watch college basketball, huh?

[Dave Damashek]

I mean, I watch a little college basketball, but I feel like a pretentious ass trying to scratch out some. Some team names when I really don't know very much about the players who are wearing those uniforms. I mean, I. Yeah, I just did. I didn't do one. I don't find it a satisfaction. I think it's a great societal event. Like I say, if you ain't getting drunk on the man's time today. I mean, not on the weekend, but on a Friday in the middle of the day. And how often are major sporting events occurring in the middle of the workday? So take advantage of it. That said, I just don't find it a great evaluator of who the best team in the sport is. I never have. Even at the height of college basketball. It's a fun. It's a super fun tournament to watch. It's not a great. It's not a great way to determine who.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, this is what I've been saying.

[Dave Damashek]

This isn't especially bad.

[Tony]

The Rams are better than the Seahawks.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah.

[Stugats]

Get out of here, Dave. That's not what this tournament's about. It's exactly what you highlighted. It's leaving for lunch early and never coming back. No one cares about who the best team is. Everyone knows it's a single elimination tournament. They're crazy upsets. And it's the last team standing. Not with you. Don't tell me.

[Dan Le Batard]

I just told you.

[Dave Damashek]

There are a lot of cones in my race.

[Stugats]

No, but you did. Imperfect measurement system.

[Dan Le Batard]

I said, I don't.

[Dave Damashek]

I'm not getting in the way of your fun. I said, go.

[Stugats]

You are.

[Dave Damashek]

Go make your brackets look. Go do. Go do. 37 brackets for all I give. Go have a good goddamn time for all I care. I just didn't. I didn't do it. I'm not standing in your way.

[Stugats]

I used to be just like you. I used to be just like you. I went several years without filling a bracket because I was like, why am I gonna fill a bracket out? And just office camaraderie, I guess because I don't really follow this sport. But this year I'm proud of myself because I made a concerted effort to get back into college basketball this season and educate myself. I'm winning bets. My brackets look Great. I'm winning DraftKings DFS contest. You know what you're talking about? I know what I'm talking about.

[Dan Le Batard]

The brackets not busted.

[Stugats]

I still got it. I can follow sports and form informed opinions and cash in because I put the work in. I'm rejuvenated as a sportsman.

[Mike]

Let's go to Applebee's after and watch

[Roy]

a bunch of games.

[Dan Le Batard]

You got that?

[Stugats]

Good bracket are dollaritas back?

[Roy]

Yeah.

[Stugats]

I've only in my main bracket because I filled out four. And the strategy is there's a couple of games. Like this is a coin flip game. Like tonight Miami vs. Mizzou coin flip game. In a couple brackets, I'll take Miami. Couple brackets, I'll take Mizzou. And in one bracket on Miami going to the sweet 16 because if they match up against Purdue.

[Dave Damashek]

I like your two favorite Missouri players.

[Stugats]

There's this guy.

[Dave Damashek]

Who are you most worried about?

[Stugats]

Mitchell, I think. And then boys. Yeah, Mitchell. Now I gotta.

[Dan Le Batard]

What a move.

[Jeremy]

Dave just pulled a bush league move from this guy. Doesn't even fill out a bracket, but wants to talk about Mizzou. Absolutely bush league from you.

[Stugats]

It was a. It was a great move. And guess what? Steven Seagal just disgusted. Just dispatch.

[Jeremy]

Exactly right.

[Stugats]

Yeah, you know, I just.

[Jeremy]

Cuz you know what you're talking about.

[Stugats]

That's right. I flipped him over. Mitchell.

[Anderson]

Boom.

[Stugats]

And I'm only like 75% sure there's a Mitchell on their team. But you're not going to check. No one's going to call me.

[Jeremy]

Sounds right.

[Anderson]

Boom. Move on.

[Stugats]

Like in my main bracket, though, I've only got one game wrong so far. I was. It was great. Imagine my surprise when I checked in midway through the BYU Texas game to see it. In one of the contests I was in, I was tied to with about 3,000 other people for first place.

[Dan Le Batard]

I gotta show you there's a Mitchell on the team.

[Jeremy]

Mark Mitchell.

[Stugats]

He's good.

[Jeremy]

Six foot nine guard.

[Stugats]

He's good. Good player.

[Dan Le Batard]

I gotta. That's my gimmick. I gotta show you Colin Cowherd's brackets. All right. So Colin Cowherd, he. So Colin Cowherd posted his bracket. And by the way, he filled it out by hand. All right.

[Mike]

I actually like this.

[Roy]

Yeah, that's a good.

[Dan Le Batard]

Filled it out by hand. But Colin Coward posted his bracket on Twitter. All right. And the tweet reads my mostly chalk bracket. It's fine if, you know, whatever. Talked myself into two Akron wins. Iowa State is my sleeper. Let's. Let's start there with Iowa.

[Jeremy]

It's been one of the best teams all year.

[Dan Le Batard]

Two seeds. Tony. They're a two Seed.

[Jeremy]

I know they've been great this season.

[Dan Le Batard]

Not only are they a two seed, but he has them losing according to his bracket. He has them losing in the Elite Eight to a one seed. So his sleeper beats every team that they're favored against, and they lose to the team that they're not favored against. I mean, I feel like his definition of sleeper a little bit different than mine. That's one. All right, number two, if you could look. If we could put it back up on our video screen here. If you look in the region in the top left in the Elite Eight, he has Duke facing. Excuse me. In the Sweet 16, he has Michigan facing UConn. Okay, fine. Nothing wrong with that, right? And he has UConn beating Michigan also. Nothing wrong with that. But then if you jump ahead to the Final Four, he has Michigan State getting an Automatic buy past UConn even though UConn beat them in the Sweet 16. What are we doing?

[Stugats]

I. Is he doing a thing? I think he's doing a thing. Colin is really good at rage baiting with some of his takes on the show. Like, Colin kind of, like, puts work into, like, what will piss people off and get them going.

[Mike]

And we fell for it.

[Jeremy]

What a piss zazzle.

[Dan Le Batard]

I'm not pissed off.

[Stugats]

He's got this AI Colin thing on that Fox apple, and he's like, man, I should have consulted AI Me on for my bracket. This is so strange. It's so wrong that I think it's an engagement rage bait situation.

[Dan Le Batard]

Like, how could he possibly think that a two seat is a. Is a sleeper?

[Stugats]

He doesn't. He can't possibly. He's worked in sports for a very long time. He's doing a thing. He's got to be doing a thing.

[Dan Le Batard]

How can he have Michigan State losing and then advancing to the Final Four?

[Stugats]

Says if he's not doing a thing, he needs to stop doing all the things he needs to stop. He needs to stop doing sports. If he's not doing a thing there.

[Dave Damashek]

I would love to do what I just did to Mike to Cow Herd and anybody else who talks into a microphone on a national level, on a local level or otherwise, like, hey, why. Why Iowa State? Can you name your. Who are your two favorite players? Like, who do you like on that Iowa State team? The answer would be, I don't care about the individual players. I'm riding with the coach. Okay, tell me who the coach of Iowa State is.

[Dan Le Batard]

Is.

[Dave Damashek]

This would expose the sports media in a way that nothing else possibly could. Nobody knows anything about any of these college basketball teams. Why? Because college basketball, like I say, is on the steep decline and has been for the last 20 years. That said, go get drunk at the bar and enjoy watching today.