The Big Suey: The Dumbest Thing We Do In Sports

Summary

Summary of "The Big Suey: The Dumbest Thing We Do In Sports" Episode on The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

Release Date: May 16, 2025
Hosts: Dan Le Batard, Stugotz
Location: Elser Hotel, Downtown Miami

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1. Introduction to the Topic: The Folly of Sports Schedule Releases

In this episode, Dan Le Batard and Stugotz delve into what they consider the most nonsensical aspects of the sports world: scheduled release dates for team schedules. The hosts express frustration over the ritualistic and often uninspired methods teams use to unveil their upcoming season's matchups.

Dan Le Batard [01:43]: "It's always, it's mine, it's his, it's yours sex. I don't think there's anything dumber in sports that we do than get excited about scheduled release date."

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2. The Overuse of Patriotism in Sports Events

The conversation shifts to the topic of patriotism displayed during sports events, particularly the repetitive and performative nature of national anthem ceremonies. The hosts criticize teams for overly highlighting military honors in a way that feels insincere and forced.

Stugotz [02:39]: "No. Oh, I think they're trying to wrap themselves in the flag again. It's a chair, damn it."

Dan Le Batard [03:04]: "I did this. I fought here. It's a cool video. And the game is. You have to be the first person to stand up after the video, start clapping."

They discuss how these gestures, while respectful, sometimes come off as hollow repetitions without genuine appreciation.

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3. Critique of Teams' Schedule Release Videos

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to analyzing various teams' attempts at creative schedule releases. The hosts compare successful and failed examples, highlighting what works and what doesn't.

• Buffalo Bills' AI-Themed Release: Hosts praise the Bills for their creative use of artificial intelligence in their release video, which features Josh Allen humorously suggesting that AI handle the schedule planning.

  Chris Cote [05:30]: "Buffalo's was great. Atlanta's was really good."

• Miami Dolphins' Underwater Theme: Contrastingly, the Dolphins' attempt is criticized for being lackluster and unengaging, relying on monotonous presentations by Zach Thomas.

  Stugotz [07:04]: "We have such a beautiful landscape to take video and make video and do all this stuff. And it was like, I want to see if Lou, let me."

• Tennessee Titans' Schedule Rizzy: The Titans are commended for their humorous and clever approach, integrating the concept of "Schedule Rizzy" with playful nods to pop culture.

  Chris Cote [07:31]: "Schedule Rizzy. That's what it was. My favorite part of that ad."

The hosts lament the Dolphins' missed opportunity, suggesting that creative teams could elevate their releases with more thoughtful concepts.

Dan Le Batard [08:46]: "He doesn't have, like, people."

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4. The Monotonous NBA Playoff Advertisements

Shifting focus to the NBA playoffs, the hosts express disdain for the repetitive and uninspired advertisements that they find cluttering the games.

Stugotz [12:45]: "There's the Chet Holmgren. Jalen Williams. Terrible."

They list specific ads featuring players and celebrities that have become overplayed, reducing their impact and viewer enjoyment.

Dan Le Batard [13:19]: "That stupid ass."

The consensus is that the saturation of similar ads detracts from the overall viewing experience, making the broadcasts feel cluttered and less engaging.

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5. Anecdotes: Encounters with "Jake from State Farm" and Sneaking into Events

The episode includes humorous and relatable stories from the hosts' personal experiences:

• Meeting Jake from State Farm: Stugotz recounts a humorous encounter with the iconic "Jake from State Farm" character while attempting to sneak into restricted areas, highlighting the absurdity and unexpectedness of such interactions.

  Stugotz [14:15]: "There was Jake from State Farm... he couldn't have been more miserable."

• Sneaking into NBA Games: Billy Corben shares a story from high school days where he and friends managed to sneak into Heat games, leading to backstage adventures and interactions with players after games.

  Billy Corben [17:40]: "But just walk through a door that just look like you know what you're doing, and you sit wherever the hell you see empty seats, pretty much."

These anecdotes add a personal and entertaining touch to the discussion, illustrating the lengths fans go to engage with their favorite sports.

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6. Airplane Role-Playing Segment

In a creative and comedic interlude, the hosts engage in an improv role-playing scenario aboard a fictional Spirit Airlines flight. This segment serves as a light-hearted break from the main topic, showcasing the hosts' chemistry and humor.

Stugotz [28:50]: "This is your captain speaking. We're going to go run through some turbines here."

Dan Le Batard [30:08]: "Before we take off, guys, are you willing to help in an emergency?"

The segment includes playful interactions, humorous mishaps, and improvised dialogue, demonstrating the hosts' ability to entertain beyond structured discussions.

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7. Final Thoughts: Recent Sports Events and Schedule Decisions

Wrapping up the episode, the hosts touch upon recent developments in the sports world, including notable player retirements and controversial scheduling decisions.

• Derek Carr's Retirement: The sudden retirement of NFL player Derek Carr is mentioned, with mixed reactions from fans and hosts.

  Billy Corben [42:16]: "Derek Carr retired... Good riddance."

• Colts' Apology for Tyreek Hill: The Colts' apology to the Dolphins regarding Tyreek Hill is discussed, though the specifics of the incident remain vague.

  Stugotz [42:41]: "The thing that we praised them for earlier in this show."

• Dallas Cowboys' Opening Night: Criticism is directed at the Cowboys for playing on opening night against perceived less favorable opponents, questioning the rationale behind such scheduling choices.

  Billy Corben [41:53]: "What the hell the Dallas Cowboys doing playing on opening night? Isn't it supposed to be two playoff teams?"

These discussions provide a snapshot of current events, reflecting the hosts' engagement with ongoing sports narratives.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Dan Le Batard [01:43]: "There's nothing dumber in sports that we do than get excited about scheduled release date."
• Stugotz [02:39]: "I like the thank you for your service. If you've served. Stand up."
• Chris Cote [05:30]: "Buffalo's was great. Atlanta's was really good."
• Dan Le Batard [13:19]: "That stupid ass."
• Stugotz [14:15]: "There was Jake from State Farm... he couldn't have been more miserable."
• Dan Le Batard [30:08]: "Before we take off, guys, are you willing to help in an emergency?"

---

Conclusion

In "The Big Suey: The Dumbest Thing We Do In Sports," The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz offers a blend of critical analysis, personal anecdotes, and comedic interludes to explore the often perplexing traditions and decisions in the sports industry. From the overuse of patriotic displays to the repetitive nature of playoff advertisements, the hosts provide insightful commentary complemented by entertaining stories and dynamic chemistry.

This episode serves both as a critique of certain sports practices and an engaging exploration of the show's unique blend of sports, pop culture, and humor, making it accessible and enjoyable for listeners who may not be familiar with the podcast.

Transcript

[Dan LeBatard]

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[Stugotz]

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[Mike Ryan]

Welcome to the Big Sui presented by DraftKings.

[Stugotz]

Why are you listening to this show? The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast? I'm sorry, I'm not gonna apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries that if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.

[Billy Corben]

I've done it.

[Stugotz]

And now here's the marching man to nowhere Fat face and the habitual liar.

[Dan LeBatard]

This episode is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings. The Crown is yours.

[Stugotz]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Billy Corben]

Didn't know who it was gonna be.

[Stugotz]

It's always, it's mine, it's his, it's yours sex. I don't think there's anything dumber in sports that we do than get excited about scheduled release date.

[Billy Corben]

Oh, my goodness.

[Dan LeBatard]

National anthem. You know, like a little game of wins and losses. Dolphins 6 and 2 start tough end of the season.

[Stugotz]

The. Okay, so first of all, real quick.

[Billy Corben]

Just Roy just crumbled your entire argument because there's nothing dumber than patriotism before the game. But let's go.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, that's right. All right.

[Jeremy]

Can I, can I pin you down on that for a second? So where is the line on patriotism for you in sports? Do you think it's dumb when you welcome back a troop and you cheer for them?

[Billy Corben]

No, that's great. You've got to group of people together. Hey, this guy happens to be here. Look what he did for us. Congratulations.

[Stugotz]

I like the thank you for your service. If you've served. Stand up. World on a pod. I don't like when they single them out and they bring them out to the middle of the court. Like, all right, hold on.

[Chris Cote]

Especially if it's like a veteran guy from, like, World War II is, like 103 years old, and he's kind of there in, like, a wheelchair, doesn't know what's going.

[Dan LeBatard]

Panthers do that every game.

[Chris Cote]

And you're like, every single game.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, because also, it's just. It's. It's performative. Like Dominique Foxworth paintings of himself behind him.

[Jeremy]

Performative by who?

[Stugotz]

By the. By the team.

[Jeremy]

You don't think they appreciate the service of the.

[Stugotz]

No. Oh, I think they're trying to wrap themselves in the flag again. It's a chair, damn it. This chair makes you talk like Dan Me.

[Dan LeBatard]

Me at Pan and all the people, like the other season ticket holders that are like, my high five buddies. At Panthers games, we have a competition. Because the way it works at Panthers games, somewhere in the first or second period, the video starts where, you know, it's all right. We're doing the thank you to service. So it's this guy. It's his story. I did this. I fought here. It's a cool video. And the game is. You have to be the first person to stand up after the video, start clapping. So it's just like, you don't want to be midway through the video. So it's that perfect timing of, like, you can tell because we've been watching so many Panthers games, you can tell when they're crescendoing and getting to the end of the video. Are you guys a race?

[Stugotz]

Are you guys like this?

[Dan LeBatard]

Stand up and clap as fast as possible.

[Stugotz]

But are you. Are you, like, at. Towards as it's starting to wrap? Are you. Are you elbows bent? Are you.

[Dan LeBatard]

Well, no, that's. Then you give it away. Then everyone else, the other people, all my high five buddies, they see I'm getting ready, but they all know sometimes I'll even be like, I'm checking my phone. I guess if I do arms on the seat, ready to go, then it cues everyone that I'm ready to jump up.

[Stugotz]

I see I had it like the inside the NBA guys at halftime, when.

[Dan LeBatard]

That is kind of what it's like the Kenny race.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Do you know the names of your high five buddies? And are they the same every season? Like, do you have the same season tickets or like, every year you have a new set of high five buddies?

[Dan LeBatard]

No. For three years now. There's John and his wife next to me. There's Kyle to my right. There's Alex to my left. There's this family. I don't know their names. The family, dad, the brother and sister. And then they always have a fourth person.

[Billy Corben]

Do you ever do the move where you're just, like. You pretend like you have a hand on your drink and then.

[Dan LeBatard]

Right. Yeah. Sometimes I'll reach down like I'm going. Because my section, it's the part of the section that they push back for concerts. So my section doesn't have cup holders. It's like the one bad thing I have. Like, I have what I would argue is the best seat in the house.

[Billy Corben]

You got a discount for those seats?

[Dan LeBatard]

No, but it's just my. My cup, my beer, my drinks, always between my legs. Dangerous Game.

[Stugotz]

They sell it on Amazon. It's like your own cup holder. It clamps onto the armrest.

[Dan LeBatard]

Really?

[Stugotz]

Yeah. You can get that?

[Billy Corben]

What's this? Amazon.

[Stugotz]

Wow.

[Jeremy]

Who gives the best hand? Is it John? Is it Kyle?

[Dan LeBatard]

Kyle gets great hands.

[Billy Corben]

It's fisting.

[Dan LeBatard]

Me and Kyle. Me and Kyle will like. We high five. And then there's like a. There's usually, like a chest bump.

[Jeremy]

It is. Oh.

[Dan LeBatard]

So gets aggressive.

[Jeremy]

We like Kyle the best.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

So the schedule release. Right. While dumb. I do appreciate that the teams have started to find ways to make it fun. I saw the Bills one with Josh Allen.

[Chris Cote]

I love you were gonna say it's overrated. I was gonna say it's actually given us an avenue, a freeway to creativity for some teams. For other teams, it was like, all right, let's mail this thing in.

[Stugotz]

So the Bills one. Let me describe the Bills one. It's Josh Allen. He's shooting jumpers. And then like, the GM calls him and he's like. While he's shooting jumpers on a hoop, he's like, what's going on? Like, hey, we gotta do the scheduled release video. And he's like, why don't you just have AI do it? And the GMs like, AI is like.

[Chris Cote]

Yeah, And Josh Allen's shooting hoops.

[Stugotz]

Shooting hoops in the.

[Billy Corben]

Already a weird start.

[Stugotz]

And what he's just saying is, like, look, everyone's using AI these days to kind of things. You don't have to sit around and think of ideas. Just have AI do it. And. And he hangs up the phone. And the GMs like, I mean, okay. And he. And he pulls it up and. And finds a thanks for doing this. And Allen Iverson's like, why am I here?

[Chris Cote]

It's like, I don't know what this is.

[Stugotz]

It's a nice.

[Billy Corben]

Well, it's funny because, I mean, how many people have thought of the AI joke and a way to do it? And it's just like. But they're going to do it in Buffalo for the football schedule release, and it's going to work.

[Stugotz]

It's going to work. I mean, it was perfect because Iverson in his role was like, why? What am I doing here? He has no idea what's happening. So. But, Tony, not every team schedule release is created equally. Right. Buffalo's was great.

[Chris Cote]

Buffalo's is great. Atlanta's was really good. There was another one that was a Minecraft one. I think it was the Chargers. Or it was the Colts. I don't remember.

[Jeremy]

One of the two wasn't the Colts.

[Billy Corben]

It wasn't the Colts.

[Chris Cote]

It was the Chargers. Okay. Oh, no, I was going to say, was the one where Tyree Kill was getting arrested. Was that the Colts?

[Jeremy]

That was the Colts.

[Chris Cote]

Okay. That's what I was trying to bring up. Yeah. So they had Tyreek getting arrested.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, it was the Colts.

[Jeremy]

Yeah. Yeah, you're right. It's a Colts.

[Chris Cote]

Okay. Atlanta had a great one of, like, Mario Kart, and they kind of had made fun of Bill Belichick. There's one that stood out more than any of them for good and bad. So I'm going to give you the bad first. I'm going to give you the good second. So the bad. The Dolphins was so terrible.

[Stugotz]

Really?

[Dan LeBatard]

So it's just Zach Thomas talking over.

[Chris Cote]

Talking like, I know this hasn't been a good, you know, run.

[Stugotz]

What?

[Chris Cote]

But we're going to come back and we're going to be all right. But it's like dolphins swimming underwater and then like a beam of light, like. Like the beam, it comes out of the ocean and then goes over to Hard Rock and then it goes like, you know, and explod. I was like, oof, you gotta clear your house.

[Billy Corben]

Recognizable voice of Zach Thomas.

[Chris Cote]

You had to write it. Zach Thomas.

[Stugotz]

That's like intro video stuff. Literally, like, they just show in the arena or in the stadium. That's not the vibe that these teams are supposed to give. Number two. I never, ever in any. I don't care if we won one game. I never want our official thing to be. I know things have been tough. Like. No, you never acknowledge it, man. You're not supposed to say it out loud. We all know it's been tough.

[Chris Cote]

We know we have eyes. We've seen it. So the best one was the Tennessee Titans. So they took a place off of Skyrizi, which is like some, like, medicine. I don't know what it is.

[Billy Corben]

Guy Rizzi, if you're allergic to Skyrizing.

[Stugotz]

My favorite part of that ad, like.

[Chris Cote]

So the Titans came up with Schedule Rizzy.

[Stugotz]

Oh, wow. Is this a video or is it just a.

[Chris Cote]

This is just a still. I've been told we can't run the video because of Sacapros and other situations, but it's Saka Prozen xr.

[Dan LeBatard]

So what happened? They showed this.

[Chris Cote]

They're like, oh, do you have an itch for the schedule release? And the guy's like, yeah, yeah, use Schedule Rizzy. So it was actually funny and creative and stuff, but I was just so floored by how bad the Dolphins one was where it could have been so good. We have such a beautiful landscape to take video and make video and do all this stuff. And it was like, I want to see if Lou, let me. You know, I'm going to produce.

[Dan LeBatard]

I love the idea of them having, like, their pitch meeting for the Titans. And they're like, one guy's just like, all right, Schedule Rizzy. This is my crazy idea.

[Chris Cote]

He's like, all right.

[Dan LeBatard]

Have you heard of Skyriz? They're never going to say yes to this one.

[Jeremy]

It looks like the Chargers did Minecraft. Not the Colts.

[Stugotz]

No, the Cult did the one with multiple people.

[Dan LeBatard]

Multiple teams.

[Chris Cote]

Multiple teams. Because I think the Jet said, we had a Minecraft one loaded up and then we had to do something different.

[Jeremy]

You have two Minecraft videos? Yeah. That's too many. Why is there no one has ideas?

[Stugotz]

Because Exactly.

[Chris Cote]

The problem is the Minecraft thing over the screen.

[Billy Corben]

I think there was somebody in the Dolphins pitch room who has like, listen, guys, I've got this crazy idea. Schedule Rizzy. Okay? And they're like, no, we're going with Zach Thomas.

[Dan LeBatard]

Give me lame.

[Billy Corben]

He's like, damn it, you guys.

[Stugotz]

You see?

[Billy Corben]

Yours was so terrible.

[Chris Cote]

I'm going to put a little video here for you guys.

[Billy Corben]

Oh, wow.

[Stugotz]

Okay.

[Billy Corben]

They just straight up stole light. The beam straight up took it, didn't love it.

[Mike Ryan]

It goes all around the world.

[Chris Cote]

It goes to Madrid.

[Dan LeBatard]

How boring did the Dolphins pitch meeting have to be? I. I for like, like the one that they're like, goes out of the water.

[Stugotz]

I'm with Izzy on this one, 100%. There was a guy in there that said, guys, I know it's going to sound crazy. What if we, like, like a. Like, like a pharmaceutical Commercial. Like, like Sky Rizzy. Like.

[Billy Corben]

We'Ll have random people dancing and having a good time despite the fact that they have this really bad disease.

[Stugotz]

You nerd. Like, they just kick you out of the room and stuff and then. And then just ignore it. Just ignore it.

[Dan LeBatard]

The Dolphins should have done. Remember the. The Titans a couple years ago had the funny one where it was people on Broadway, like, the logo, and it was like they're playing the mean Birds for the Eagles. They should have done that with like, at like people walking out of like 11 at like 8am on a Saturday morning.

[Stugotz]

Oh, that would have been cool.

[Dan LeBatard]

Like, just hammered people in Miami. Like, oh, Dolphins, week one. Oh, they play the. The Patriots. I mean, Brady, you know, just like, just like stupid stuff.

[Mike Ryan]

Maybe the Titans are just better at this than everybody because they're the ones that set the standard with that one on Broadway in Nashville. And now they're the ones that just did. Schedule Rizzy. So whoever is coming up with their. Their campaigns is clearly the best at this, right?

[Jeremy]

Do you guys think that they use Zach Thomas's voice because of Jason Taylor chanting Jets, Jets. When his son was drafted by the Jets? Like, do you think that we now have burned the Jason Taylor bridge?

[Stugotz]

Get Joy Taylor on the line.

[Dan LeBatard]

Let's ask. I didn't even see that clip. He did the letters.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And Joy was in the video doing it too. A lot. Lots of bridges were burned when Mason got drafted by the Jets. Even though Jason Taylor played for the Jets.

[Stugotz]

For the Jets.

[Billy Corben]

Exactly. He was in the enemy's uniform. There are special instructions going on.

[Stugotz]

With what I'm supposed to be ignoring us. Keep it going. There's nothing.

[Chris Cote]

What special instructions?

[Jeremy]

This is a major boy who cried wolf situation with this building where it's going to burn down one day and we're going to be like, you know, emergency. Because, like, they'll do like a very quick, like, someone come on. Like, by the way, disregard the fire dog. And then like, the fire alarm will be going on for four straight hours.

[Billy Corben]

When the fire that come.

[Jeremy]

And if you weren't there for like the 30 seconds, like, oh, please, just. If you miss that, like, there's just panic within the entire building because again, this is gonna be going on all day long now. And what are we testing, guys? Elser. Elser. Ring, ring. Hey, your fire alarms work. We test them every single day. We're good. No more testing necessary. Hello, Mr. Elser. Yeah, it works. Okay, we've done it. This has to be the only studio in America that Has a fire alarm in it. And you set it off every single day. It's working. Okay, enough testing. Goodbye, Mr. Elser. Just call him Elser or Mrs. Elser or Ms. Elser.

[Stugotz]

It's just Elser. Mr. Elser was my father.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, sorry. Sorry. To the Elsers.

[Billy Corben]

When the fire does come, Chris, you're going to jump out the window backward.

[Chris Cote]

Have you found it yet or.

[Dan LeBatard]

No, it's. I have the Internet. The Internet's working for me. It's not finding anything.

[Stugotz]

Tony, you. You, Jeremy, Izzy and I consume a lot of NBA playoff basketball, right? We're watching. We're locked in on these games. Do you guys have the same experience I have where it feels like there are only four ads?

[Billy Corben]

Oh, my God.

[Stugotz]

There's. There's the Chet Holmgren. Jalen Williams.

[Jeremy]

Terrible.

[Chris Cote]

The one last year was terrible.

[Stugotz]

Did they just.

[Chris Cote]

One might be even worse.

[Dan LeBatard]

Did they just do the thing of, hey, it might have been bad last year, but it popped. So we're gonna get the same group back together.

[Stugotz]

Well, they added one. Williams wasn't in it last year.

[Chris Cote]

He might not be in it next year.

[Mike Ryan]

Which Jalen Williams?

[Stugotz]

The one who was a fraudulent All Star. According 18% last game, the second AD is the Will Ferrell.

[Mike Ryan]

I feel like I've seen that more than any other one. It's a lot.

[Stugotz]

Number three is the Villanova throwing the cap to Dante DiVincenzo. Number four, which is. Thank God. They switched it. For a long time, it was the Jalen Green Wingstop commercial. They finally switched it. Now it's back to the. Oh, nothing.

[Dan LeBatard]

That.

[Stugotz]

That stupid ass.

[Billy Corben]

You forgot one.

[Stugotz]

What is it? What's the other one?

[Billy Corben]

Don't forget about the Grizzlies.

[Stugotz]

Oh.

[Billy Corben]

My goodness, that one is just too much. It's the same five or six commercials over and over.

[Stugotz]

How much money are they sinking in? And it's no one else paying. And also the bait man. One, which was funny at first.

[Chris Cote]

I'm done.

[Stugotz]

Now I'm like, all right, we get it.

[Chris Cote]

Another villain. I thought, who? Who I ended up liking who? Jake from Safeorm.

[Stugotz]

That guy's gotta be a dude. But we caught him at his most humblest moment. We did what?

[Dan LeBatard]

You guys met him?

[Stugotz]

Oh, my God. Have you heard the story?

[Jeremy]

Did we.

[Stugotz]

All Star Weekend in Cleveland. It's snowing like crazy. Ubers are legit. A two hour wait, right? And so me and Tony seek refuge in the bar. In an Irish bar, right? That's packed in the gills just drinking, right? And so we decided to come out and forage our way out of there to find a way home. And you know how, like, on the east coast, they'll have all these restaurants and places? There's, like, almost like a mudroom that you enter first before you actually enter the restaurant. So in that little mudroom area, huddled, like, in a corner with his coat, like, wrapped around him, was Jake from State Farm. And all teeth chattering. Teeth chattering. And all these drunk people like, oh, Jake from State Farm. And he couldn't have been more miserable. And we're just like, hey, man, what's up? And he's like, yeah. And it kept it moving, man. Poor guy.

[Billy Corben]

So he was really nice. He was nice.

[Stugotz]

Like, we caught him at most.

[Dan LeBatard]

He doesn't have, like, people.

[Billy Corben]

Was he where.

[Stugotz]

That's what we service. Like, that's what we said on the other side.

[Jeremy]

I can't believe he would have people, but I guess he would, right?

[Stugotz]

So watch this. A year later in Utah, I go out with Juju, and we're getting into this club where the after party was, and I literally went downstairs to go get something, and then I'm trying to go back up into the VIP area, and I literally just followed Jake from State Farm, and he had an entourage, and we're just walking. I walked at the end, and the security guy was like. And I was like. I just pointed, and he's like, oh, yeah, yeah, go ahead. Because in his mind, of course, the guy from ESPN knows Jake from State Farm. They're boys. Why would they be rolling?

[Jeremy]

Wait, you pretended to be part of Jake from State Farm's entourage?

[Stugotz]

100%.

[Billy Corben]

Was everybody wearing red polos? Because if you could have just been wearing a red polo, it's perfect.

[Jeremy]

I was. I was thinking that when we were at F1. So, like, the way that our setup was at F1 is like, there's, like, the part that's on the field with, like, the tents where, like, the celebrities, like, were hiding or whatever until they'd go and walk and go to the paddocks. And, like, you just see, like, this entourage of people walking through the crowd with security. And. And I told Coogler, who I was with, I'm like, we should just, like, walk in the next group of people and see how far they'll just kind of push us through. Because Patrick Mahomes was there, and he was there with his. And he was there with, like, a large group of people. Like, if we just get on the tail end of this group, it's very possible we just get pushed through the Next area. It would never work for me either. Like, who the hell is this nerd?

[Stugotz]

Because you got. You guys. It's all about, like, just a look in your eye, right? If you're like this, looking around. Nah, it's a man.

[Billy Corben]

I try that. Back when I was in high school, I think I might have told the story before. My best friend Warren and a couple of his friends said they snuck into Heat games, right? Because you would get, like, this pass from school, and they would just give you really cheap tickets for free, but they would go, take that as back. But just walk through a door that just look like you know what you're doing, and you sit wherever the hell you see empty seats, pretty much. And so I kept. He kept coming back with developed pictures. This was the 90s of, like, him with. With basketball players. Because he didn't just get into the game. He got into the locker room after the game, and he's got pictures with Dan Marley, with Charles Barkley. So I'm like, all right, I'm going. I gotta do this this time. And of course, like, I'm nervous about it. Like, I feel like the. The one who's giving everything away, right? So I'm like, you know, head down. I'm always second to last in the. In the group.

[Dan LeBatard]

Head down is rookie move.

[Billy Corben]

Well, not head total, but. Okay, maybe that would.

[Jeremy]

You gotta go. You, like, fist pump the security. Go, yo, how's it going?

[Billy Corben]

Yeah. I mean, but a bunch of high school kids probably would have felt weird.

[Dan LeBatard]

That's why, like, we're talking about adult.

[Stugotz]

Like, I get it.

[Billy Corben]

I don't know how it worked. And so this game, we get in, and I'm just like, wow, look at that. I did it. And then we're sitting in, like, row four for the entire game. And the entire game, I'm just like, wow. I'm gonna tell this story about how I snuck into a Heat game. It's gonna be the best part of it. It they weren't done. They wanted to go into the locker room. So I'm just like, oh, God. So somehow we all got onto the floor, and we're walking past the security guard into the hallway where the lock. Where the players were going, three me and three other people. This time I was last in line. All the first three guys get in. Security guard turns around right before me is like, hold up. Where are you going? And I'm like, damn it. And then I have the option of either outing my friends or being like, I don't know where I am. And so I went with, I don't know where I am and I had to wait for them outside. They come back two weeks later, developed pictures of a bunch of Indiana pacers.

[Izzy]

The Dan LeBatard show with Stu Gotts is sponsored by BetterHelp. Mental health awareness is growing, and that's a good thing. But there's still work to do. In a recent survey, 26% of Americans say they've avoided seeking support out of fear of being judged. And that hesitation, it doesn't just affect the individual. It ripples out to families, workplaces, entire communities. This is Mental Health Awareness Month. Let's break the stigma together. Because when people are healthy and happy, we all thrive. Therapy isn't just for major trauma. It can help with setting boundaries, learning positive coping skills, and simply becoming the best version of you. BetterHelp has over a decade of experience connecting people with licensed therapists who fit their needs. With over 30,000 professionals and 5 million users worldwide, it's therapy that fits your life. It's completely online, flexible, and you can switch therapists at any time at no extra cost. We're all better with help. Visit betterhelp.com DLB to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com DLB.

[Tony]

Hey everybody, it's Mike Ryan. You know I'm a race fan. You know, I travel to races and I had a great experience a couple of weeks ago sitting outside the rv, toasting the good times with Miller Lights in hand with some of my best buddies. It was truly a memory that I will remember forever and truly a time that was made better by making that time a Miller time. Trust me when I say there just isn't a better feeling than hanging out with your boys, clanging those beautiful white cans of Miller Lite and realizing that you don't gotta worry about the taste of your beer. Because the taste of your beer is designed for people who love the taste of beer. A taste that you know you can depend on. A great beer trusted by beer lovers for 50 years. From game night to race night to parties with friends or a special anniversary, celebrating important occasions means more moments with the coolest people in your life. Cheers to 50 years of Miller Lite, the great tasting light beer for people who Love beer since 1975. Miller Lite great taste. 96 calories. Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller Time. Celebrate responsibly Miller Brewing Company, Milwaukee, Wisconsin. 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

[Chris Cote]

Okay, so I thought I was good with money. Turns out I was really good at ignoring it. Like, how am I spending this much on delivery or Uber or that one shoe store that I buy too many shoes from? Then I started using Monarch Money. And, dude, it's a financial wake up call. Monarch's not just some budgeting app. It's basically your money command center. Puts everything, account, credit cards, investments into one place. So you're not guessing anymore. And listen, I found stuff I didn't even know I was paying for. Since I started using Monarch, I'm tracking my spending, actually saving, and yeah, even having money check ins with my wife. And we're looking at each other and we're like, yeah, okay, we're all good. It makes the hard stuff way easier. And over a million households use. Monarch is named the best budgeting app of 2025 by the Wall Street Journal. So it's not just me hyping up. It's legit. It's real. Real deal. Holyfield. And get control of all of your finances with Monarch Money. Use code [e-mail] in your browser for half off your first year. That's 50% off your first [e-mail] with code Dan.

[Stugotz]

Don LeBatard. There is no question, Dan LeBatard, show included, anybody else, that this guy is the best player on the planet. Whether he wins the Stanley cup or the Cox Smite this year, there is no question about it.

[Jeremy]

St.

[Stugotz]

What's going on? Altered World. Oh, my goodness.

[Jeremy]

This is the Dan Levitar show with the ST Gods.

[Stugotz]

Speaking of sneaking into places, which, by the way, this is all for adults. If you're under the age of 21, don't try any of this stuff.

[Billy Corben]

Don't try.

[Stugotz]

Don't condone it. But if you're.

[Billy Corben]

If you're of age, although if you're under it, if you're not of age, you probably won't get punished as hard. So it's something to think about.

[Dan LeBatard]

Still don't do it, though.

[Jeremy]

No, but, like, Izzy's right. If you're gonna commit, like, crazy crimes, do it as a minor.

[Stugotz]

Man. Look.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, it's not within reason.

[Stugotz]

Hold on.

[Jeremy]

I'm not saying you should, but if you do, maybe when you're younger, I'd.

[Stugotz]

Like to introduce you to a history of black teens being tried as adults.

[Jeremy]

Well, not in every case.

[Dan LeBatard]

Okay?

[Jeremy]

Just. I'm saying it seems like every Case you shouldn't. I'm saying you should, you shouldn't do it. You shouldn't.

[Dan LeBatard]

Two Americas.

[Jeremy]

But if you're going to get expunged, very much. Two Americas.

[Stugotz]

But the sneaking into NBA games and into restricted areas thing is actually topical because, I don't know, you guys saw this. The Phoenix Suns got hit with another lawsuit. This is from a guy who was, he was a former employee, the director of safety, security and risk management. And he basically got, he's suing that. He got retaliated against because he presented things like, hey, these are huge security breaches in the organization. And one of the things was, apparently the Suns keep failing security audits. The league does this, and also law enforcement does this, where they will have plainclothes officers try to sneak in the games with stuff just to see if they could. And according to this story that came out on espn.com, plain coast officers attempted to enter the arena using valid game tickets while concealing weapons. Two of the officers were able to bring a knife into the arena undetected.

[Billy Corben]

Unbelievable.

[Stugotz]

Goes on. On December 3, 2020, four officers from the same department conducted another field test of security measures and successfully brought in two handguns and one knife through security. Now, I don't know if you've been to an NBA game recently. Everyone goes through the security arches. If you've got a backpack or anything like that, it's got to go through an X ray machine. I'm always annoyed because every time I go to any NBA game, It's like your AirPods, your phone. I literally empty all out my pockets. And then they're like, oh, this hotel key card made it go off. I'm like, how sensitive is this thing? Meanwhile, guys are walking in with guns and knives. How is that possible?

[Chris Cote]

Game from back in the day.

[Billy Corben]

That's absolutely insane. And so he brought that up and then got retaliated against and now he's suing the Phoenix suns, he says.

[Stugotz]

2023, Taylor's trailer. Excuse me. Submitted a presentation for management that outlines specific incidents, including these three. Number one, March 2023, an unnamed former part time employee was found to have stolen more than $40,000 in shoes, merchandise and apparel during their employment.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, hell yeah.

[Stugotz]

In April 2023, a disgruntled subject interrupted a Sun's photo op with team executives, including team president Josh bar. And in June 2023, a political influencer harassed former Phoenix Mercury player Brittney Griner at the Dallas Fort Worth airport, delaying a team flight by three and a half hours.

[Mike Ryan]

Hold On. I want to know about that one.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, that one, to me, seems like the most likely for a variety of reasons. Number one, it's not in your building. It's at the airport. Number two, the security detail that goes with the Mercury is not anywhere near the security detail that goes with the Phoenix Suns.

[Mike Ryan]

Although you would think if Brittney Griner was on your squad, you might want to up.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Mike Ryan]

As an organization, number one.

[Stugotz]

And number two, you would think at the airport, like, nothing kind of gets by enough to, like, continue. Right? I'm fascinated by the way these airport meltdown videos. TikTok knows what I want. I want to see them, these people going crazy at the airport. I'm like, do you not know where you are?

[Billy Corben]

When has that ever worked?

[Stugotz]

I don't know.

[Jeremy]

If you're gonna melt down at an airport, though. Do it as a kid.

[Stugotz]

Yes, that. There you go.

[Jeremy]

Also, by the way, I'd like to publicly apologize for saying that minors should commit crimes because they can get away with that. People are not thinking that. That was very funny.

[Billy Corben]

You should have said that as.

[Jeremy]

Never commit any crime, son.

[Billy Corben]

Legal crime.

[Jeremy]

Follow all your rules. Yeah. Follow the rules everywhere you go, forever and ever. Amen.

[Mike Ryan]

By the way, I went on my five spirit flights in the last six days. Everything went off perfect. I'm here, I'm alive. My experience was great. I made friends with every person that sat next to me on a flight. It was a blast.

[Stugotz]

What about the one that sat in your lap? It's a spirit flight. That's the joke.

[Mike Ryan]

I actually had open seats next to me on three different flights.

[Stugotz]

Were there strap hangers?

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

The middle seat was open. It was great. I enjoyed it. I had. I had a pleasant experience. I did have to squeeze everything into one tiny little handheld bag because I didn't want to pay extra, you know, to check. Check a bag or bring an actual carry on. But it was a great experience. I really enjoyed it. And you, your criticism was unfounded. You guys not wanting to. Not wanting to hang out with the commoners. It's pretty elitist show because you just can't.

[Billy Corben]

You can't.

[Mike Ryan]

You can't kick it with the commoners.

[Billy Corben]

And I understand because I've never been on a spirit fight. I cannot.

[Jeremy]

You should do it. Do it this weekend. Do it next weekend. Just go find a $35 flight and do it.

[Dan LeBatard]

Get that first row big seat, though.

[Jeremy]

Oh, yeah, I'm gonna find you a flight. Hey, guys, ever seen, like, the concept, which I don't think happens anymore? Could happen. I don't believe that it ever happened where people are like, I'm just gonna go to the airport and I'm gonna pick a flight to go on.

[Mike Ryan]

Unsurprisingly, that was something I wanted to do for years and years and years and years, and I never did it. One time I. The airport, I went and was looking for the cheapest flight, and it was like, how's a $500 flight to Puerto Rico? And I was like that. That's not what I was.

[Jeremy]

Yeah, you're trying to show up. Like, oh, where's the 18 flights? It's like in 1930, Omaha or whatever.

[Mike Ryan]

And it. Yeah, it's never going to.

[Dan LeBatard]

What's wrong with Puerto Rico?

[Mike Ryan]

I would have loved to go to Puerto Rico. But hold on. A 500 flight to Puerto Rico out of nowhere.

[Jeremy]

Just called it a floating trash.

[Dan LeBatard]

Something like that.

[Jeremy]

Don't kill Jeremy, just for the record.

[Dan LeBatard]

And if you're. But if you're going to be under. No, I'm just kidding.

[Stugotz]

It's a hit. Croat if you killed Jeremy.

[Mike Ryan]

But if you're going to do it, do it as a minor.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Jeremy]

Double hate crime if you kill Jeremy.

[Chris Cote]

Something I didn't like about what Jeremy said about the spirit thing is he made friends with everybody. Sat next to you. Talk to people that sit next to you on airplane.

[Mike Ryan]

Yeah, I'll just turn. Hey, I'm Jeremy. Give him a handshake.

[Stugotz]

And I know you introduce yourself. You got.

[Dan LeBatard]

If you put your hand out and that's the first. Like, no, no, just have. Maybe small talk is fine. Don't be like, hey, you put your hand out. That's why.

[Mike Ryan]

Only if they've. If I can tell they are. Want to engage. I know how to read a situation. Okay.

[Jeremy]

Please wait. Walk us through. You reading the situation. If.

[Stugotz]

Hold on.

[Jeremy]

I got to sit next to you on a flight here.

[Dan LeBatard]

All right.

[Stugotz]

Okay, here we go. Role playing and spirit.

[Chris Cote]

So there's three flights.

[Stugotz]

So.

[Mike Ryan]

All right, so let's see here. Get real close.

[Stugotz]

Okay.

[Billy Corben]

So so gets the armrest.

[Stugotz]

All right, so Billy's in the middle seat. Let me paint the picture. Billy's in the middle seat. Tony's in the aisle because he's got long legs. Jeremy, your window. Okay. And here we go.

[Billy Corben]

Tony just farted.

[Jeremy]

Where's the aisle? Here? Here?

[Stugotz]

No, no, the aisle is where Tony is.

[Mike Ryan]

All right, so that's interesting. It's not normally the aisle, but.

[Jeremy]

All right, let's switch. You can be window just so that this is.

[Mike Ryan]

No, I like the aisle.

[Chris Cote]

I don't want to. The window.

[Stugotz]

This is your captain speaking. This is flight 227 to Miami. We'll be landing in about two and a half hours. Sit back and enjoy the flight.

[Mike Ryan]

Hey. Hey. I'm Jeremy.

[Jeremy]

God, I hope this plane goes down.

[Mike Ryan]

Headphones in and I'll enjoy the flight.

[Stugotz]

This is your captain speaking. I actually got pretty hammered before this. I'm gonna try and land this thing.

[Jeremy]

With my eyes closed, upside down.

[Billy Corben]

So you. You actually reached your hand out there.

[Mike Ryan]

Well, I did, because I know Billy, but in. In a real scenario, it's my fault.

[Stugotz]

I gotta get back into character like this.

[Jeremy]

This is reversal.

[Stugotz]

All right, here we go. Three, two, one. Yes. This is your captain. We'll be in air in about three and a half hours. Cars landing in Fort Lauderdale.

[Chris Cote]

This plane kind of sucks.

[Stugotz]

About like so. And then sit back and enjoy the flight.

[Dan LeBatard]

Before we take off, guys, are you willing to help in an emergency? You're sitting in an exit row. I need you to both. Can you take your headphones off, please? I need you to hear me. Are you guys good to. In case of an emergency, help out? You good? Tony, you could.

[Billy Corben]

You need.

[Dan LeBatard]

I need a verbal yes.

[Mike Ryan]

Sure, sure, sure.

[Jeremy]

Thank you.

[Mike Ryan]

All right, let me just put my bag up in the thing.

[Dan LeBatard]

You should have done that. You should have done that before you sat down.

[Stugotz]

This is why I'm normally in the aisle.

[Jeremy]

All right, we got to start over again.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Sir, please do not throw your bag out the window.

[Mike Ryan]

Thank you.

[Stugotz]

In case of emergency.

[Jeremy]

This guy opened the emergency exit.

[Mike Ryan]

All right, let me start this again. Let me start this again. All right, I'm going to take my bag.

[Stugotz]

I'm going to take.

[Chris Cote]

Final destination.

[Stugotz]

This is your captain speaking. This is Spirit Flight 666 straight.

[Jeremy]

I don't like that. Start again.

[Chris Cote]

I thought I saw Briles on this plane.

[Billy Corben]

Why are they already in the sky, though? The sky is behind them. Can we get like airport behind them or something? No, the sound is good. It's the visual.

[Stugotz]

Why would it be behind them at any point? There's no windows behind them.

[Chris Cote]

That's schedule, Rizzy.

[Jeremy]

Don't worry about it.

[Chris Cote]

That's schedule.

[Stugotz]

Okay, here we go. Yes. Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. This is Spirit Flight 254 to Fort Lauderdale. Flight time will be about three and.

[Dan LeBatard]

A half hours from Miami to Fort Lauderdale.

[Jeremy]

What?

[Dan LeBatard]

It's three and a half hours?

[Stugotz]

Well, traffic is pretty bad. It's Miami, the worst traffic in the country. According to Dan Lebatard, air traffic is bad. Anyways. Sit back, relax, and enjoy the flight.

[Mike Ryan]

All right, let me just put my bag underneath the seat here in front of me, because I don't have any other room.

[Billy Corben]

Why are you narrating everything you do?

[Mike Ryan]

This is an audio medium. Theater of the mind.

[Stugotz]

There you go.

[Mike Ryan]

Hey, how are you?

[Jeremy]

Hey. Wilfred. Nice to meet you.

[Mike Ryan]

Jeremy. Nice to meet you. Where you from?

[Jeremy]

Topeka.

[Mike Ryan]

Wow, Topeka. What are you doing here in Miami?

[Jeremy]

You know, just. Just, like, catching flights, talking to people.

[Mike Ryan]

Really? Are you one of those people that'll just show up to an airport and ask for the cheapest flight?

[Jeremy]

Hell, yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

So that's how you ended up here on Spirit Bing.

[Billy Corben]

Can I help you, sir?

[Chris Cote]

Two gin and tonics, please.

[Billy Corben]

Can I see some ID?

[Chris Cote]

No.

[Stugotz]

Have they ever ID'd anyone on the flight?

[Billy Corben]

No, but the one in the aisle looks a little younger.

[Stugotz]

Folks, this is your captain.

[Billy Corben]

He also looks like he might not be from here.

[Jeremy]

What's your name? Jesse.

[Mike Ryan]

Oh, Jeremy.

[Jeremy]

Jeremy.

[Stugotz]

Folks, this is your captain speaking. We're going to go run through some turbines here. I want everyone to make sure that se are buckled, fastened. Husband, we're going to suspend beverages. Sit back and relax. In the meantime, I don't.

[Billy Corben]

Do you.

[Stugotz]

What do you call a plane that flies backwards? A receding hairline.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm okay.

[Jeremy]

Upside down.

[Stugotz]

Pineapples.

[Mike Ryan]

I'm all right. But I. I do appreciate the. The offer. I'm flattered.

[Jeremy]

Hey, you.

[Dan LeBatard]

How you end scene?

[Jeremy]

Way to go, everybody.

[Stugotz]

Hey. Very good.

[Jeremy]

Yeah.

[Stugotz]

Improv troop. Oh, yeah.

[Mike Ryan]

So, in the end, I did make friends, though. I really did. There was a single mother whose son's name is awesome, which I thought was awesome, with a capital A. And he plays Little league baseball. And so they.

[Chris Cote]

They.

[Mike Ryan]

It was great because I was telling them that I had just gone to. To Pensacola and had gone to see the Blue Wahoos play, and I was telling them all about the stadium, and so she was gonna take her son to a game. I was just great. It was.

[Stugotz]

I'm gonna tell you right now, that's the worst name you can give a kid. That could. Better be incredible, better be awesome. Better be awesome. Right? Because if you're just merely good, man, they will tear you apart on that playground, by the way.

[Billy Corben]

Careful, Jeremy. You're announcing. You're talking to the single moms. I think we all see right through that.

[Mike Ryan]

No, I told my wife about it.

[Billy Corben]

Okay, so I want to shout out like that.

[Dan LeBatard]

Can I give a shout out on X to Kevin Brooks?

[Mike Ryan]

Who tweeted us?

[Dan LeBatard]

Yes. Navy SEALs sometimes fall out into the water, a technique called hello casting or hello dropping.

[Billy Corben]

But nobody can find video of that saying there.

[Dan LeBatard]

It's Navy seals right there. They're very hard to track.

[Stugotz]

Yeah, that's what, like, involved often after a rubber boat.

[Dan LeBatard]

There's a boat there, and then there's also a helicopter. Like, it's when. Like, it's a lot of times when there's people doing it on the boat, a helicopter will come in, and there's people that are going there too.

[Stugotz]

Hold on. Are they jumping into the boat? Into the water?

[Dan LeBatard]

They get down. Like, there's, like. They get down onto, like, the little bar, and they're sitting there, they're talking their thing, and then once they're ready to go, they fall back.

[Stugotz]

Well, since this thing has a name, it should be pretty easy to find, right? Like, video of. That's true, right? Or is it because it's Navy SEALs? We don't.

[Chris Cote]

Is that guy a Navy SEAL, or.

[Jeremy]

Is that guy just Google Dangerous Game?

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm just saw it somewhere.

[Billy Corben]

Then it's somewhere like, Chris didn't actually see it happen in person. He wasn't training for the Navy seals. No offense.

[Jeremy]

Kevin Brooks is from Austin, Texas, so he's probably run into a bunch of Israel Gutierrez.

[Billy Corben]

Wow. Can we get Kevin? He seems to be the perfect guest right now.

[Mike Ryan]

I also made friends with my Uber driver, Ben. He used to actually be the Pensacola Blue Wahoo's mascot, which was just so surprising to me that I happened to be bumping into this guy. He spent time as a mascot, but now he quit to. To work in children's television, actually, which I thought was really sweet. They're starting a show for children's education.

[Dan LeBatard]

Is there anyone Jeremy won't be friendly with?

[Billy Corben]

I was gonna say none of these people actually think you are their friend.

[Mike Ryan]

I became friends with Ingrid. She and her boyfriend are long distance. Right now. He's in Indianapolis.

[Dan LeBatard]

Once again, a single mom long distance. I mean, a little trend going on here.

[Stugotz]

And Ben, let me just say right now, I've googled, I've youtubed hello casting. They are jumping backwards in terms of.

[Dan LeBatard]

Like, they jump back. They're not falling.

[Stugotz]

They're not falling.

[Jeremy]

Guys, this isn't going to stop until you just say, Chris was right.

[Dan LeBatard]

Yeah. The falling back thing might be on the boat.

[Jeremy]

Like, just tell me he's right so.

[Dan LeBatard]

We can move the Tony thing. I think. I think that's. I think I'm.

[Stugotz]

Yeah. So James Brooks, or who was the Brooks. What's last name? Who?

[Billy Corben]

Adam?

[Stugotz]

Yes, Kevin Brooks, but yes, James L. Brooks.

[Dan LeBatard]

My point was really just lower helicopters falling into the water.

[Mike Ryan]

Like that doesn't happen.

[Billy Corben]

It'd be funny if that's we.

[Dan LeBatard]

I love how you're focusing on me. You dismissed that people jump out of helicopter.

[Stugotz]

I said you got a lot of people.

[Dan LeBatard]

That was not a question. That was a sarcastic Billy. A lot of you have a lot of people. That's what that was. Come on.

[Jeremy]

Hello Casting. I don't want to have this go on any longer than it's already got on. But hello casting doesn't seem like it's backwards.

[Dan LeBatard]

Good try, Kevin.

[Jeremy]

I'm not going to say Kevin's wrong. I mean, Kevin, thank you for your service.

[Chris Cote]

Again, if you did.

[Stugotz]

If not.

[Jeremy]

No, he did. I mean, according to his Twitter. Okay, 23 years.

[Billy Corben]

Hello casting sounds like a great company name for podcasting.

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, hello dropping. Also, look at this.

[Stugotz]

This is a hello casting property. Like, right?

[Billy Corben]

Yep. Logo has to be yellow for some reason.

[Stugotz]

You're listening to hello Casting. Yeah. No, it's a lightsaber. It's just like a little Cody saying hello. Hello. Cassie.

[Mike Ryan]

Irene from the hotel bar was from Mobile, Alabama, and her daughter had just recently graduated from Ole Miss. So she was really excited. Well, no.

[Stugotz]

And then.

[Mike Ryan]

No. You know the people. I mean, you know the friends I made at. At the hotel bar in New Orleans as well. There was a couple from Boston, right. And their daughter was graduating from Ole Miss as well. And they were meeting, and it was really amazing because they were from Boston, but they recently moved to Naples. Their daughter graduating from Ole Miss, obviously. All of them meeting up in New Orleans for the graduation party. It was an amazing time.

[Stugotz]

I. I wish I could call them for this, but. But he's absolutely right. I was there. I saw, like, the remnants of that party leave the hotel bar. You know what I have no use for at a hotel?

[Billy Corben]

What's that?

[Stugotz]

I mean, the concierge.

[Mike Ryan]

Couldn't disagree more.

[Stugotz]

I travel a lot. Right over the last man. Now we're coming up. 15 years of me traveling professionally, whether it was working for a team and scouting and stuff or working in media and having to go to places I've never, not once. Wait, not even like, what time is it? Or where's the bathroom?

[Billy Corben]

I'm working that out.

[Stugotz]

Never. Not what? Never, comma, not once use the hotel concierge.

[Mike Ryan]

I try to befriend the hotel concierge every single time I go to a hotel.

[Jeremy]

Why do you just need friends like why? Why? Yeah, I like to talk to people and like.

[Mike Ryan]

Well, I don't know about you. Everywhere you go, I don't know about you guys.

[Stugotz]

Right.

[Mike Ryan]

But I don't have a lot of time for.

[Jeremy]

You seem to have a ton of time. Talk to everybody you run into.

[Mike Ryan]

Hold on. I don't have a lot of time for my lifelong childhood friendships to spend time with the people that I like, love and care about and who build me up. And I don't know about your guys experience. Spending most of my time talking with all of you. It's nice for me to speak to people who are gonna respond kindly. And a concierge is literally paid to do so. So it's really nice to walk up and just have a nice little experience. But my goal always is to break through the facade, to break through the fake kindness and get to some real kindness because I've bonded with them over something or I've charmed them into trying to help me out. So this experience for started when I took my now wife, my then girlfriend, to Atlanta for a Valentine's Day when we were like. I was like 20 years old and we were at the hotel and I had called. I had called, called in advance. I had called in advance because I knew nothing around the area. I had never been to Atlanta before. And the concierge was like, I'm gonna. I'm gonna help you guys out. And so I get. I get to the hotel and I told him I was gonna be there for Valentine's Day. I get to the hotel, there's flowers all over the bed. I didn't even order that. Flowers all over the bed.

[Jeremy]

Yes.

[Stugotz]

Yes.

[Mike Ryan]

It's the concierge and then the concierge. I walk down to the concierge later, I'm like, hey, I'm Jeremy. He's like, oh, I'm Trevor. I remember you. I remember your phone call because you were the nice guy that called and was so thankful for the recommendations I had. He got me a restaurant across the street. We got the private table in the corner overlooking the city. It was perfect. Why? Because I went out of my way.

[Dan LeBatard]

To be put up the video of me being right. I am right. Thank you. Let's go.

[Billy Corben]

Such an example. Fist pump during somebody falling back monologue into the water.

[Dan LeBatard]

That's just somebody falling back from a healthy video.

[Billy Corben]

I'm pretty sure of how not to do that. Because you saw the lady who was.

[Dan LeBatard]

Watching was like, oh, that's completely misleading what you just said. That's not true. She's Been trained. She's been training for months and she finally is doing it and we're seeing the crescendo of all her training.

[Stugotz]

It looked like a fail video.

[Billy Corben]

I think you're right.

[Stugotz]

That looks like a fail video.

[Dan LeBatard]

You guys aren't looking clearly.

[Billy Corben]

All right, let's see it again.

[Jeremy]

All right, hold on. He's going to play it again. Here, Lewis, play that one again.

[Stugotz]

Wow, that's amazing. Send this to Dan right now.

[Billy Corben]

Do they have the shark repellent? You had to spray them with the shark repellent.

[Stugotz]

Is the propeller it's not worried about.

[Dan LeBatard]

I can't even look at this.

[Chris Cote]

Don't look now.

[Billy Corben]

Oh, it's time for a new game.

[Stugotz]

Don't look now. I thought we were retired this bit.

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, we're still on an airplane.

[Billy Corben]

Oh, wow.

[Dan LeBatard]

I'm gonna turn that off.

[Stugotz]

Don't look now. Look.

[Dan LeBatard]

Oh, we're up in the sky.

[Stugotz]

This is your captain speaking. I'm going to hand it over to first officer Tony. Don't look down.

[Chris Cote]

Hey, everybody, don't look now, but Chris has something to read and don't look now.

[Dan LeBatard]

Presented by Smirnoff, the world's number one vodka. Please drink responsibly.

[Tony]

Dan was an.

[Dan LeBatard]

It's just my ears. I'm cl. My ears are clogged. I'm on an airplane.

[Chris Cote]

That's what it is.

[Dan LeBatard]

That's what it is.

[Chris Cote]

He's got to chew gum. Yeah, you got to chew gum.

[Billy Corben]

I don't like that our co pilot's wearing a face mask.

[Chris Cote]

We're good. Everything's on autopilot. Plus, you know what was almost on autopilot? The bear season. Caleb Williams was looking to get out.

[Stugotz]

You saw that news before he even got. They tried everything under their power to get out.

[Dan LeBatard]

Stop looking. Why are you looking?

[Stugotz]

Sorry.

[Billy Corben]

Sorry.

[Chris Cote]

I don't know if you guys saw. The schedule makers made some interesting choices on big games throughout the season. Did you see one big game that was of note where the schedule maker said, hey, we didn't know anything. We haven't seen anybody, haven't talked to anybody. I don't know what's going on. Steelers, packers on prime time with a certain somebody still out there possibly linked to the Steelers.

[Billy Corben]

Literally can't look. So no, we have not seen it. One that I did see before, we were told not to look. So that's the caveat there. What the hell the Dallas Cowboys doing playing on opening night? Isn't it supposed to be two playoff teams? Normally like that's just such nonsense.

[Chris Cote]

What's a Super bowl champion and then play somebody else.

[Billy Corben]

Yeah, it should have been the Washington commanders. Talk about a profile game. Like you got the one quarterback who everybody wants to see and a team on the on the rise.

[Stugotz]

Right.

[Billy Corben]

Instead of the Cowboys, which you don't know what you're going to get like.

[Chris Cote]

Yeah, that was America's team, though.

[Billy Corben]

Not so much.

[Chris Cote]

One more thing. We did not even think we mentioned it on the show. Derek Carr retired.

[Billy Corben]

We weren't looking.

[Stugotz]

So I saw so many. Good riddance. Did you see them from Raiders? Well, I heard of a lot of Goodrin's tweets from Raiders fans.

[Billy Corben]

I saw him in braille. I felt them and I was like good rid dance.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[Chris Cote]

Last one. Colts apologized to the Dolphins for Tyreek Hill. Now deleted video of him getting I wasn't looking.

[Billy Corben]

What was it?

[Chris Cote]

Sequestered by some sort of official.

[Stugotz]

The thing that we praised them for earlier in this show.

[Billy Corben]

I thought it was way worse than that. I wasn't looking, but I thought it was going to be way worse than him just being approached by a cop. Like I thought it was going to be a joke about having too many kids.

[Chris Cote]

Also works.

[Tony]

Hey everybody, it's Mike Ryan. You know I'm a race fan. You know, I travel to races and I had a great experience a couple of weeks ago sitting outside the rv toasting the good times with Miller Lights in hand with some of my best buddies. It was truly a memory that I will remember forever and truly a time that was made better by making that time a Miller time. Trust me when I say there just isn't a better feeling than hanging out with your boys, clanging those beautiful white cans of Miller Lite and realizing that you don't gotta worry about the taste of your beer. Because the taste of your beer is designed for people who love the taste of beer. A taste that you know you can depend on. A great beer trusted by beer lovers for 50 years. From game night to race night to parties with friends or a special anniversary, celebrating important occasions means more moments with the coolest people in your life. Cheers to 50 years of Miller Light, the great tasting light beer for people who Love beer since 1960. 75 Miller Light Great Taste 96 calories Go to millerlight.com dan to find delivery options near you. Or you can pick up some Miller Lite pretty much anywhere they sell beer. It's Miller time. Celebrate responsibly. Miller Brewing Co. Milwaukee, Wisconsin 96 calories and 3.2 carbs per 12 ounces.

[Izzy]

The Dan LeBatard show with Stu Gotz is sponsored by BetterHelp. Mental health awareness is growing, and that's a good thing. But there's still work to do. In a recent survey, 26% of Americans say they've avoided seeking support out of fear of being judged. And that hesitation, it doesn't just affect the individual. It ripples out to families, workplaces, entire communities. This is Mental Health Awareness Month. Let's break the stigma together, because when people are healthy and happy, we all thrive. Therapy isn't just for major trauma. It can help with setting boundaries, learning positive coping skills, and simply becoming the best version of you. You Better Help has over a decade of experience connecting people with licensed therapists who fit their needs. With over 30,000 professionals and 5 million users worldwide, it's therapy that fits your life. It's completely online, flexible, and you can switch therapists at any time at no extra cost. We're all better with help. Visit betterhelp.com DLB to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp H-E-L-P.com DLB.