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Welcome to the Big Sui presented by DraftKings.
Dan Le Batard
Why are you listening to this show?
Commercial Announcer
The podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast?
Dave
I'm sorry.
Dan Le Batard
I'm not gonna apologize for that.
Commercial Announcer
In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.
Dan Le Batard
I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries that if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.
Mike
I've done it.
Commercial Announcer
And now here's the marching man to Nowhere Fat Face and the Habitual Liar.
Tony
This episode of the Dan Levitard show is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings. The crown is yours.
Dan Le Batard
Sweet 16 action last night. First two games were awesome. I. I hated that those because the last, you know, the two games at the end of the night weren't great. Arizona crushed Arkansas and Illinois beat Houston. But the first two games, Purdue and Texas, awesome. Iowa, Nebraska, awesome. Like both at the same time. I don't know if you guys know the way it works. I can't have sound on multiple TVs at once. It'd be really confusing. So I can only have sound on one of the games. And I chose for it to be Purdue in Texas. And then I'm watching, you know, keeping track of I.O. nebraska on the other TV, but that's on mute.
Mike
You know about that Multi view.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah, but then you can switch back.
Zaz
But it can't be multi sound.
Mike
Multiple sounds on that drive a person insane. But you just switch, like you just toggle the screen.
Jess
Does it happen with you guys?
Tony
With my YouTube TV, it takes forever for the sound to go over. If I have two games going, if I go over to the right one, it doesn't instantly go.
Mike
You know about that Good Internet.
Tony
Is that what it is? It takes sometimes like 30 seconds, I'm telling you. Maybe it's just my setup. My Internet's fine in general, I think.
Dan Le Batard
But can I tell you, I think it was at the Heat game. Jessica Smitten joining us. Of course. Hello, Jess. Hey, good morning.
Jessica Smitten
Hello. Good morning.
Dan Le Batard
At the Heat game. I was at the Heat game last week. And they do, you know, those, you know, trivia or something in timeouts or whatever. And they had a kid, I don't know, he looks me like 18. All right. And it's. What sound is this? And they play the sound of dial up Internet. It. The kid heard a noise he'd never heard before. He had no clue what the sound was. I mean, like, we're at that point where dial up was. So that's how. Do you remember when you would use dial up, Jess? Do you remember? I don't know. Maybe you're too young even, Jess. But you would use dial up and then. And then. That is a compliment. You would use dial up and then you would lose the signal because your mom would like, pick up the phone downstairs and she wants to make a phone call. Marva's in the middle of downloading something.
Dave
Wow.
Mike
You didn't have a business line, right? Oh, you have to have the business line.
Dan Le Batard
You would always get interrupted by your parents picking up the phone. Anyway, Jess, were you into the games last night?
Jessica Smitten
I was very into the games last night. But I have a question because I have the same scheduling issue as you do, and it's the same thing tonight. There's multiple games on at the same time. But in the women's NCAA tournament Today, starting at 2:30, we have staggered start time so I can watch all the games back to back to back. Why do the men have all of their games on at prime time? Or 10pm is like. I know understand that's prime time for the west coast. But I mean, there's just no way I'm staying up till midnight to watch Houston shoot 28% from the field.
Dan Le Batard
No, that.
Jessica Smitten
That sucks.
Dan Le Batard
And, like, the first game tonight, St. John's and Duke, which, like, gonna be really great. Alabama, Michigan's gonna be great. Anyway, the first. The first game. Duke, St. John, 7, 10. You gotta have the first game at 6. The first game's gotta be 6pm These games, you're starting them, too. You got four games, Jess, all starting after 7pm Come on, get a clue.
Jessica Smitten
Can I also say, the other day, I heard Dusty May was going to be on the show. I said, oh, that's. That's cool. Lehman has been embedded with the Michigan basketball team this whole year, working on a documentary series about the road to March Madness. And I said, I'll. I'll stay tuned for that. Maybe there's a sound bite that I can send a Lehman that they can put in the show. Well, I was wrong. I was wrong about that.
Dan Le Batard
I gave you plenty of sound bites there. It's a problem.
Tony
Most enjoyable interview he's had in a while.
Dan Le Batard
He told us he was into it. He was asking me questions along the ride. He loved it.
Jessica Smitten
Okay. I don't know if it's going to make the final cut.
Dan Le Batard
Did you guys see this? So Will Wade. All right. Will Wade is now the. He's once again. Once again the head coach at lsu. That seems pretty rare that that happens, right?
Mike
Yeah, this is very rare. I saw someone on. On Twitter accuse LSU of building the Avengers of asshole coaches.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah, yeah, that says. And tell everybody who you're referencing. Of course.
Mike
Well, Lane Kiffin is there. I don't know if you saw that. And Will Wade is, you know, has his own reputation. I cannot. Oh, Kim. Don't you dare say a bad thing about Kim.
Roy
We love her.
Dave
Don't.
Mike
Yeah, Kim. Kim, She's a saint. Yes. You tread lightly around the asshole Avengers. I didn't even consider she was one of them. One thing you need to know about me, Zaz, I'm a big Kim Mulkey guy.
Tony
All right?
Mike
All right. I don't know what it is, baby.
Dave
I don't know.
Zaz
He's an owl.
Mike
I don't know what it is. Thank you, buddy.
Zaz
All right.
Mike
Yeah. Big fan of.
Dave
Kidding.
Jessica Smitten
Speaking of 10pm tip offs, they're playing tonight against Duke. That's going to be a really, really fun game. A lot of storylines in that one.
Mike
Yeah, that one's a very exciting game in the. In the women's tournament.
Dan Le Batard
So Will Wade has NC State. NC State lost in the first four to Texas, who lost last night. Really fun game against Purdue. We can get to the games in a moment here. But Will Wade becomes again the LSU head coach. He signed I think a six year deal with NC State last year. This was the first year of his deal. But here's what happened. All right, so let's go back. I think this is about two weeks ago when there are, you know, the LSU job is, is opening up and you know, the rumors are starting to fly. So as any good reporter would do, they would ask Will Wade about the potential of becoming the LSU head coach once again. Here it is, a lot of talk
Jessica Smitten
with you and potential position at lsu. Just wanted to see if anybody from that campus reached out to you and just give you an opportunity to speak on that.
Will Wade
No. Is the job open there?
Tony
Huh?
Will Wade
No. So why would. I'm not. Listen, be very clear. I'm excited at NC State. I was hired at NC State to do a job. This wasn't going to take one year. I've already met with our administration about next year and some of the changes that we need to make and some of the things that we need to do to put this program where it deserves long term. So I'm not, and you know, I'm not on social media, I'm not into gossip, I'm not into any of that sort of stuff. But look, we're going to win and we're going to win big at NC State.
Dan Le Batard
For me, Jess, it's one thing to do the whole lying thing, all right? And it's another thing to try and make the reporter feel like an asshole. And that's what he did there.
Jessica Smitten
He was right though. The job wasn't open. And it's unclear if the job ever was open because they seemed to hire him before they fired their coach that had signed a seven year deal, what was it, three years ago because of the amount of turmoil that the program was in because of the recruiting violations from Will Wade's first 10 years. So I feel like there's like a small domino, big domino thing happening here with like small domino, Brian Kelly gets embarrassed on national television against Texas A and M and then like big domino, Will Wade's back at LSU because of all the things that had to happen in the athletic department for this to come back around. But I'm with you, Zaz very, you know, just kind of bratty way to answer that question. And then ultimately he looks like a liar. I think Boo Corgan, the NC State athletic director would tell you that he, you Know, he said he felt like he was lied to, and he wants to commiserate with the fans, and he's disappointed. And then my last final thing on this is the statement that he put out was a very graphic design is my passion statement. It was just very ugly. What are we doing? Like, why'd you do it in red? Why'd you make NC State colors? Like, did the NC State designers, they're like, yeah, we're not gonna make one for you, so you got to make one yourself. He's like, okay, I'll make it look like it's an NC State thing. It was very ugly. I did not like it.
Dan Le Batard
All right, so as you guys go. Sorry.
Dave
Well, I'm just curious where you come down on this. If you. Would you rather be Will Wade or Wade? Will. I think Wade. Will is better. And if you're William Wade, I think you go Billy Wade over Wade. Will Wade. How say you.
Jessica Smitten
Are you Wade William, though, or are you just Will Wade? Will.
Dave
No, Will, I think really, like, if you're Will Wade, I think the better option is Billy Wade.
Mike
I.
Dave
That, like all of the derivations of William Billy is the coolest. In fact, I am a William. I'm William David and. But I named son Billy. I didn't name him William. I named him Billy to. Just because, like, once you get to those teen years, then you want. You feel like, I want to be more grown up. And so you go like, let's lose the Y, because that's a little boy. And then I'm Bill. But then if you're Bill Damaschek for the. That that's Squaresville. But you're Billy Danishek as a grown up, you're cool. And if you're Billy Wade, you're cooler than that dork we just saw admonishing the nice reporter that Will Wade says everything about you could see it coming from a mile away. Why? Because his name is Will. What kind of hardo goes with Will over Billy?
Dan Le Batard
So, like Jessica alluded to, the NC State ad is Boo Corgan. And here he is yesterday giving his. His side of the events that took place leading up to Will Wade leaving.
Asked him what he needed. Right. What do we need to be competitive from there? As far as the resignation letter, it was an email, right. That we received from his agent in talking with his agent.
Jessica Smitten
So he did not reach out to you to directly?
Dan Le Batard
Not. Not from that standpoint. There's a lot of people, particularly the ones in that subsidize the success in athletics that feel disappointed Maybe even feel like they were lied to. How do you speak to them in regards to what you're going to do in the future and to sort of say, hey, stick, stick around, stick with us. We're going to do this? I would commiserate with them in terms of feeling lied to. Right. In terms of let them know that it's not something that I didn't know anything about and, you know, as surprised as they are by what's going on, but reassure them that we're going to find a coach that wants to be at NC State.
An email from the agent to the ad. That's Bush, Jess. That's bush.
Jessica Smitten
Yeah. I mean, and also the ugly graphic design is my passion statement. I would think that's more bush league, but I mean, I don't know. There's a lot of ire for Will Wade and lsu, all this stuff. Like, it's, I guess my question is, I don't really, I don't know, I don't watch a lot of LSU men's basketball to begin with. But was his record, like, is his record that good that it's worth doing all of this, like, weird public just kind of shadiness? Like I, I, it's, he's not like got like a coach K record, right. It's very, I don't know, it's weird.
Dan Le Batard
Like he was let go at LSU the first time under scandal. Right. There were, I think, like, wasn't there an FBI probe involved and yeah, there was a wiretap.
Jessica Smitten
Yeah. But now it's like, okay, well, you can pay players.
Dan Le Batard
He's.
Mike
But he is bringing back position. Well, for, for the modern era is just highlights.
Dan Le Batard
A lot of the problems variance with paying players.
Dave
A lot of, a lot of the
Mike
things that were held against him his previous go round were like, hey, you know, it'd be great today that guy
Tony
that we fired, Mike, you know I have one rule to live by, right?
Mike
Don't place parlays on multiple long shots. Don't say a game is won when it hasn't hit trip zero.
Tony
Always drink your Jagermeister ice cold. That's the rule. Everything else is merely a suggestion.
Mike
Everything else?
Tony
Everything else.
Mike
Wearing clean underwear every day, well, that's
Tony
just a personal decision. Brushing your teeth, obviously smart, but not a rule.
Mike
Never pee pee on an electric fence.
Tony
Okay, Maybe there are two rules, but the one that is 100% that I insist on completely, Jagermeister must be drank ice cold or don't drink it at all.
Mike
Damn, that's cold.
Tony
Exactly. You're finally starting to get it.
Mike
Drink responsibly. Jagermeister liqueur, 35% alcohol by volume, imported by Mass. Jagermeister U.S. white Plains, New York. Hey, Roy, buddy.
Roy
Yo.
Mike
You know that energy shift when the game gets good and everybody all together in unison knows to stand up on their feet? Oh, absolutely, Mike.
Dave
Yeah.
Mike
You've been at many big time sporting events. You know that moment quite well. That's what it's like when you take your first sip of Cuervo. Oh, delicious. It's the signal that says, we're not checking the time anymore, pal. It's when small talk turns into stories. Cuervo, man. It's that high five. A random stranger effect.
Dave
That's right.
Mike
The game is popping. You're hugging people you never met before. That's the kind of energy that Cuervo brings. It's so smooth, so delicious.
Dan Le Batard
That's the Cuervo effect.
Mike
Keep it Cuervo.
Tony
Oh, folks, look at me. I'm in my 30s, which is old enough to know better and somehow still young enough to ignore that information pretty regularly.
Dan Le Batard
Like you know me.
Tony
I'll have a couple drinks, normal adult behavior, nothing crazy. And then the next morning, my body reacts like I have made a series of terrible decisions. With no supervision, my sleep score tanks. I wake up confused. Suddenly, even replying to one text feels like a full task. But that is why I have discovered and gotten into Cheers Restore. Alcohol hits differently now. It affects your brain, your sleep, your liver, all of it. And Cheers Restore is made for that. It's a dual action after alcohol aid designed to support your brain and your liver after drinking. And the origin story is wild. It started with a Princeton student researching dhm, which is this compound tied to alcohol related effects in the body. It's in Walgreens CVS 7 11, basically everywhere. It was on Shark Tank. All I do is take three capsules after my last drink or before bed. And the next morning is way less dramatic. Same night out, way better morning with Cheers. For a limited time, our listeners are getting 20% off your entire order by using code dan@cheershealth.com just head to cheershealth.com and use code dan for 20% off. After your purchase they will ask you where you heard about them. Please support our show and tell them the Dan Levitard show sent you.
Dan Le Batard
Don Lebatard.
Dave
I don't think I ever got that many roses in my whole life.
NBCUniversal Olympic Promo Announcer
Stugats.
Dave
Certainly not from your lovely grandfather, God. May his soul rest in peace.
Dan Le Batard
This is the Don Lebatar show with the stugats. Anyway, the games last night though. Purdue beats Texas in a really close one. Iowa beats Nebraska also in a close one. Did you see? So what was it? Nebraska. Nebraska's trailing Iowa by three with a little more than a minute remaining. Iowa has the basketball, Mike. Fred Hoiberg and boys. They only had four and boys on the floor.
Mike
That's coaching says.
Dan Le Batard
And it resulted in a layup which resulted in an actual three point play. Game over. How do you. How do you only have four players on the floor in that spot?
Jessica Smitten
By the way, ever heard of a team only having the one fewer player than needed on the field or on the court in a pivotal point in a game before? So I truly can't relate. I mean, these Nebraska fans must feel terrible.
Dan Le Batard
Well, so let's. Fred Hoiberg, predictably, was. Him and his team were asked about it post game for rink.
Commercial Announcer
About 58 seconds left.
Dan Le Batard
That deep ball to Alvaro for the bucket. I think there were four players on the court.
Fred Hoiberg
Can you say what happened, Myron, that, you know, put that one on me at. It was a miscommunication and, you know, I'm the head coach. Put that one on me.
Roy
The four men on the.
Jessica Smitten
On the court, on that final inbound did.
Mike
There's some confusion online about if that's the rules.
Jessica Smitten
You're supposed to have five guys on the court.
Mike
Were the officials supposed to hold the ball before the ball was penciled?
Fred Hoiberg
Good question, Robin. I've never been in a situation like that. I know they always count to make sure there's not six. I don't know the rule on that with. With four. But yeah, I mean, again, we. It was a miscommunication and you know, unfortunately it. It happened. But, you know, as far as the rule, I've never been a part of anything like that.
Dave
So I just wanted to make the point that the point out this spectacular irony or coincidence or whatever it is that coach Norman Dale did in fact only put four guys out on the floor and said, my team's on the floor, famously for high school basketball fans from the mid 20th century in Indiana, my team's on the floor. His team's name, the Huskers. Look at Freddy Hoiberg doing it with the huskers in the 21st century. How great is that?
Dan Le Batard
Dave? It's interesting that you say that because. And good on Fred Hoiberg for taking full blame, as he should, obviously. But it's interesting that you say that because obviously the officials, if you have six on the floor they're like. Like, it's going to be a technical foul. But if you have four on the floor, like in Hoosiers, the referee says you. You need a fifth. Like, the referee isn't supposed to actually allow the ball to be inbound. If you don't have your team yet on the floor, and then the coach acknowledges, okay, this is what I want. My team is on the floor. That's actually, like, you are supposed to get that discretion from the referee. And so last night, the referees clearly were not counting the players on the floor. It's, again, it's hoiberg's responsibility, but normally the referee would say, coach, you need five guys.
Dave
Is it though?
Jess
You're.
Dave
The solicitous referees are supposed to step in and be like, hey, trying to do you a solid here, coach. You. You. You can throw another guy.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah. They're supposed to count football games, but
Dave
not in the NFL. Not in football games. They don't do that when you only have 10 guys out there.
Dan Le Batard
Yep, you're right. You're right. But in basketball, yeah, it's normally like, hey, you know, you don't inbound the ball yet because. Because it was coming out of timeout, and maybe the fifth guy is still coming off the bench. Like, you're waiting for all five guys before you hand them the ball. And clearly the referees, they did not do that. So, anyway, really good games last night. Just, you know who Chapel Ron is, because I don't have a clue, and I feel like you might be. I. I know that can't. So I keep seeing on social media this. Am I even saying the name right?
Jess
Yes.
Dan Le Batard
This Chapel Roan is all over my timeline. I don't have a clue. This person is Dave.
Jessica Smitten
Do you know who Chapel Roan is?
Dave
I am aware of her because for better.
Dan Le Batard
It's a hers.
Dave
I'm pretty sure it's her. It's a her. I saw a picture on social media in the last couple of weeks that she had her side bosom exposed. Is that right?
Jessica Smitten
She. She does tend to expose the side bosom. Yes. Zaz, this is a social media controversy for Our Times based off of an incident that happened in Brazil last week where Chapel Roan was performing at a festival and she was at.
Dan Le Batard
Oh, so she's like. She's like a pop artist.
Jessica Smitten
Wait, do you actually not. I'm genuine.
Tony
Yes.
Jess
This is not big.
Dave
He genuinely doesn't know. She genuinely does.
Tony
Got a very finite, physical pink pony club.
Jessica Smitten
And she's not in Metallica, so I
Tony
guess I like What?
Dave
I love Pink Pony Club.
Jessica Smitten
Do you watch College Game Days as.
Mike
Yeah.
Jessica Smitten
Okay. Do you remember when they did the Ought to Go bit with Samuel a couple times last. Okay, that was a reference to a Chapel Roan song. Yes. I'm trying to find you at your level where you may have encountered.
Dan Le Batard
I know that song.
Jessica Smitten
Watching snl. She also has been on SNL twice, I think.
Dan Le Batard
Okay, go on.
Jessica Smitten
So she's a performer, she's an artist. She's, you know, a young woman. She's at her hotel in Brazil.
Dan Le Batard
And.
Jessica Smitten
And apparently, according to the soccer star Jorginho, his, I think, wife or perhaps girlfriend. I'm not sure if they're married. His wife's daughter, who is the daughter of also Jude Law, who I found out has like seven kids, didn't know that they were at the same hotel. And apparently she walked past Chapel Roan and smiled at her or something like that. And then a big, ginormous, burly security guard who was part of Chapel Roan's security group went up to her and told her, like, told her off, basically, and was like, don't do that. And this girl was very rattled and upset. And so Jorginho, whose wife is a somewhat famous reality person, posted it on his Instagram story. And then there was a ton of backlash at Chapel Roan, and people were making memes about how she hates kids and she wants to, like, kill kids and stuff. So then she posted a video where she was like, I don't know who that security guard is. I don't hate kids. I have never done anything like that before. And I don't even remember seeing this girl or her mom. And I feel bad for them because that's, you know, shitty that that happened to them. And then a lot of people were like, well, you know, this was your security guy. What are you talking about? And, like, Jorginho's Katherine Harding is her name. The mom of the daughter was like, you should know, if a security guard is representing you, it's still your fault. And was liking all these comments, bashing Chapel Roan. And then the security guard who's got like a ton of Instagram followers, he must be some sort of, like, security guard influencer. I'm not sure. He posted on his Instagram yesterday he was not representing Chapel Road. And he apologized and was like, no one told me to do that. So this is a whole controversy involving a lot of people with a lot of social media followers and Chapel Roan, who has now been apparently banned from performing in Rio by the mayor of Rio, who was very ticked off by this whole thing, even though this incident occurred in Sao Paulo. So the, the, the. The tentacles of this run deep. Zaz. It is insane.
Jess
The best part about the mayor banning
Dan Le Batard
her from the performance.
Jess
It was his second day as the mayor.
Dan Le Batard
Oh, he's a man about action.
Jessica Smitten
He was like elected the day before.
Jess
He was elected the day before he became the mayor and was like, perfect win for me. Georginio's upset. Let me defend him. And kick Chapel Rowan out of here.
Jessica Smitten
Yeah.
Dan Le Batard
Dave, did you follow all that?
Dave
I have no GD idea the whole story that Smitton, just what the hell I haven't heard.
Jessica Smitten
But you know Jude Law, he's of your era, right?
Dave
No, no, my air is none of your business. The point is I didn't. I had no idea of. I am vaguely aware the chapel. Chapel.
Tony
You got it.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah.
Dave
You got. Aron is a. I'm aware of her. Pop. Pop star, Yes. I have children.
Dan Le Batard
The question is, I didn't know about
Dave
all this stuff down in Brazil. I heard a single note of this
Jessica Smitten
is the question is, is she a brat who like wanted to tell off this kid and is now using the bodyguard as the fall guy? And also worth noting, she has had a lot of incidents with paparazzi. She does not like being a famous person, basically. Like she wants privacy and obviously it's not afforded to her most of the time, which understandable, but she's gotten in like little dust up. But the question is, did she use this bodyguard as a fall guy? She actually did tell him, like, hey, go yell at this little, you know, 12 year old girl. Or was this just a complete misunderstanding? He acted of his own accord.
Dave
Well, can you just go back to this? Because I can't really render a verdict until I understand what the exchange was. What is the alleged incident that the chapel roan said to a security guard or to the child directly, don't look at me, don't make eye contact with me.
Jessica Smitten
I. Okay, I need. Now I need to pull up. He posted a long Instagram story and now I want to pull it up and read it to you directly. So give me a second. Because the allegation was that he basically came over when they were having breakfast and quote, unquote, was speaking in an extremely aggressive manner to both my wife and my daughter, saying she shouldn't allow my daughter to, quote, disrespect or quote, harass other people. Honestly, I don't know at what point simply walking past a table and looking to see if someone is There can be considered harassment. He even said he would file a complaint against them with the hotel. While my 11 year old daughter was sitting there in tears, my daughter was extremely shaken and cried a lot. So like this, the daughter seems like she had a truly like, upsetting experience and it was very traumatic for her to be yelled at by the security guard. So that does not seem to be the question.
Tony
I got a daughter. Daughters be crying.
Jess
The thing about this, that's, that's really insane, Dave. And this is, this is where it gets like spicy, is that this security guard who took the fall, the security guard who took the fall claimed to not be there working on behalf of Chapel Rome. He's saying I wasn't Chapel's personal security guard. I also wasn't the hotel's security guard. So the question is, whose security, whose security was he? Now, this was a music festival, right? So was he there for one of the other performers? And, and he was just there at the hotel. And what's interesting too is there was a picture posted of the daughter with Louis Capaldi, another singer who was performing in this festival. And so the question becomes, was this little girl just running around every table where there was a celebrity trying to
Tony
ask to take a picture?
Jess
And is she? Maybe, maybe. Is this family spoiled and entitled and thinking that they deserve you grow up with everyone? Are they? What I'm saying is. No, I'm saying this is what the Internet is saying. The question is it just a reputation preceding her?
Jessica Smitten
I think perhaps we should look at the mother and that's right. Himself, because included in the Instagram story where they called out Chapel Road and the bodyguard at the end of it in all caps quote, without your fans you would be nothing. And to the fans, she does not deserve your affection. So they immediately went on the attack.
Tony
Yes.
Jessica Smitten
This Instagram post, which I feel like this is where I net out on this, like for the rest of this poor child's life, she's going to be the girl who was involved in this thing because of her parents, because her parents decided to make it like a public spectacle and go after a super famous pop star. Whether or not you like the pop star or not. I'm not like a huge Chapel Rome fan by any means. I'm just trying to look at this objectively. And now this little girl is always going to be remembered as little girl who was like, sad because Chapel Roan's bodyguard may have been mean to her or some other random bodyguard was. And I feel like the parents putting the little girl on blast and like, putting her picture out there and being like, look at how upset my daughter is. Is kind of weird.
Tony
I love the idea of this guy not being associated with Chaperone at all and just being a security guard. And it's just like when I'm in a lobby and I see someone who needs security, I have the security.
Dan Le Batard
I like. I like that idea that he's just, he's just, he's just security guard for wherever he is. Like, who do you think is. Who do you think is his employer? Then like, who pays?
Mike
Love of the games.
Dan Le Batard
He just shows up.
Tony
Didn't want to, but he's like, I got a security.
Dan Le Batard
Maybe then on the way out, like, he leaves an invoice on the hotel desk. You know, I did security.
Dave
Yeah, you owe me security just for the side boob. That's the only part he's responsible for.
Roy
Zootopia 2 has come home to Disney Plus. Let's go get ready for a new case.
Jessica Smitten
We're the greatest partners of all time.
Tony
Friends.
Jessica Smitten
Gary the Snake and your last name the snake.
Commercial Announcer
Dream team.
Jessica Smitten
New habitats. Zootopia has a secret reptile population.
Roy
You can watch the record breaking phenomenon at home. Zootopia 2 now available on Disney Plus. Rated PG. And right now you can get Disney plus and Hulu for just $4.99 a month for three months with a special limited time offer. Ends March 24th. After three months, plan auto renews and $12.99 a month terms apply.
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Dan Le Batard
Don LeBatard.
Jessica Smitten
Mr. Mr. Schurt, if I may say for a second. Miami. They were simulating the snap count the entire game and they were clapp at the line of scrimmage and the Only thing I want to see clapping are them cheeks on Mrs. Met in my face, my shirt. All right, so that's one thing. STS They're a bunch of cheaters, Dan. And you know who should be cheating? Mrs. Met on Mr. Met. And he can watch if he wants.
Dan Le Batard
This is the Dan lebatar show with the St. Jess. Speaking of the women's tournament, I want to make sure I get your opinion here because I saw this a few days ago, you know, last week. Look, with the women's tournament, I'm wholly uninterested in the first couple rounds because all the games are blowouts and, and that's not true.
Jessica Smitten
The first round, the first round, there are some, A lot of blowouts. The second round was awesome. If you, if you didn't pay attention to the second round, you missed out on a lot of really good games, with the exception of the UConn Syracuse game, which was in primetime, which. That's a whole other things as that, I think.
Dan Le Batard
Well, that's what I want to mention.
Jessica Smitten
Are you about. Yeah, like the, you know, South Carolina and UConn as one seeds being on ABC while the other games are on ESPN and ESPN2. When in their first round games they're going to win by 70 points. Like they're, they're going to just beat up on these 16 seeds. I agree with you. It's, it's. They're not the most competitive games, but there are other really competitive games like the Iowa Virginia game, which was on ESPN in the middle of the workday, ended up going to double overtime and was a huge upset. And Virginia became the first team to play in the Final Four in the women's tournament and advance to the second weekend. That was a pretty huge game and a huge upset. But, you know, not as, I mean, not as many people watched it as the, I think the South Carolina game, which was on at 7 o', clock, which was a few hours later. But yes, I know you, what you're going to bring up, which is the Syracuse head coach talking about constantly being seated in the UConn subregional. Is that right?
Dan Le Batard
Yeah. So, like UConn beat Syracuse last weekend. I think the score was 98 to 45. And as Jessica mentioned, like, it's on ABC and it's just, it's a total shellacking. And so here is the Syracuse head coach. This is after the game and like, she doesn't think it's fair that they have to play UConn, but we, I
Jessica Smitten
thought, deserved a little more respect after being in his business for 37 years. And to have to come and be in this particular bracket every freaking year is unacceptable.
Mike
Is wrong.
Dan Le Batard
I mean, just, they were the nine seed. They won a game, so they're going to play the one seed the next round. It's Yukon. Like, I guess she's saying she's had to play UConn several times. We all know UConn's, like, almost always one of the best teams. Like, does she have a right to be mad? Because I don't know, it sounds like just, you know, be a seven seed and then you don't. To play UConn in the second round, you know?
Jessica Smitten
Yeah, she even said, like, bump us down to a 10 and then we could go to, like, Greenville or, you know, or not Greenville, Columbia, play South Carolina. Like, she was saying it was a much longer quote than that, but she was saying, like, she feels like it's personal that Syracuse is constantly put in the same group as UConn, and that in years where, you know, Syracuse has the potential to be good enough to win a second round game, they're going up against this juggernaut in UConn every year, and it's not fair. And so according to ESPN, five of the last seven NCAA tournament appearances that Syracuse has, has had have been versus UConn in the second round. Three of them have been on UConn home court. So that is quite a significant amount. And part of the reason is travel, because it's cheaper for CFS to rent a bus and drive to, you know, stores than it would be to fly them to LA to play UCLA or whatever. So I think she's saying, like, it's like, we've had this, this exact same matchup so many times. It's lazy bracketing. Put us in a different group because we're going to lose this game every time. We don't have, you know, what's going
Dan Le Batard
to lose that game, second round of UConn. Like, everyone's going to.
Jessica Smitten
Yeah, but, like, that's possibly that certainly this year UConn is, is really, really good, and it's going to be difficult for any team to beat them. But I think it's. She's saying, like, you know, let us have a different matchup, basically. Like, it's probably even difficult for her to get fans to come to this game, even though it is close by, because it's like, okay, well, it's Yukon and they're going to lose in the second round. Whereas, like, she's saying she's not even really Getting a chance to play someone different. She also was the coach at Buffalo before this, where they played in the UConn Sub Regional A number of. So I'm just saying, like, I think, you know, it probably wasn't the time and the place for her to do this, because it sounds like, you know, okay, skill issue, be better then, like, be. Try to be good enough to beat UConn. You know, you're the head coach at Syracuse. That seems like something that you should be more concerned with. But I do think there is a point there with just how the brackets are made and, like, just repeatingly, repeatedly giving people the same matchups year in and year out because five of the last seven is pretty. That's a pretty, you know, large proportion of your tournament appearances that are ending up playing against UConn. And according to Justice Collins on Twitter, since 2017, UConn has sent Syracuse home four times in the second round. And then she said, I looked at our other other top teams early on the repeat knockout. The most is twice. Plus, she played UConn when she was at Buffalo in 2019. So other teams are not playing the same team as many times as Syracuse has played UConn. I think that's what she was upset with. And then I think in ESPN article I read, Princeton was also, like, you know, seated. I think they were the overall 34. And,
Mike
yeah, that's been happening. Technology, we got to get on that. Sorry about that, Jess. But I guess it all boils down to. I don't think it's so much personal as it is regional.
Dan Le Batard
It's money.
Mike
Well, it's like all these teams that have played Yukon a bunch are all in the Northeast.
Dan Le Batard
Yeah, yeah. It's money. It's. I mean, and you got to remember, you know, those first couple weeks, they. They play at home there. There's finances involved there. Jess, sorry we lost your connection, but make sure you check Jess out every week. Notre Dame podcast the Echoes with Mike Golick Jr. Great job, Jess. We appreciate you. Let's do some updating of our brackets. You have the Midwest region. We have some round of 32 results. We need to make sure we catch up on here, guys. All right, number five, Texas Tech. They were represented by this Jalen Brunson.
Dave
Looks like the valet driver who lost your keys.
Tony
It's a good team. We lost there.
Dan Le Batard
So they are done and advancing. They're playing tonight. They lost to number four, Alabama, represented by Paul Fine.
Dave
Bomb. Looks like the maitre d at a fancy restaurant.
Dan Le Batard
All right, that's a Good one. That's a good one. In the East Region, number seven, ucla. They are done. They were represented by Cal Raleigh.
Dave
Looks like a motorcycle highway patrol officer
Tony
thought that was underseated in this tournament
Dan Le Batard
and they're playing tonight, but they lost last weekend to number two, UConn, represented by Adam Silver.
Dave
Looks like a newly opened Chapstick.
Tony
Strong chapstick around.
Dan Le Batard
All right, there you go. So tonight you got St. John's Duke, Alabama, Michigan, Michigan State, UConn, Tennessee, Iowa State. I'm in.
Zaz
Hey, Zaz, some good games tonight?
Dan Le Batard
Yes.
Dave
I wanted to ask Smitton, and now I ask you, were these. Listen, listen, it's a. Pittsburgh.
Mike
Would you like to answer the questions as was asking.
Dave
I would like to. What was the question?
Mike
Yeah, I mean, that's exactly the point, Dave. Yes, but proceed.
Dave
What was the question? What was his question?
Mike
What say you, Dave? Say it.
Jess
Just say it.
Tony
Just say we park our cars excited.
Dave
He said he was excited to watch these games. Wasn't that Was.
Mike
Wasn't that a question? Yeah, it was weird. We never got to the question.
Dave
Oh, well, excuse me, please. The floor is yours. The floor is yours.
Dan Le Batard
I mean, who else would we be excusing? You're the one who came in.
Dave
Of course, I did not know that there was a. We were leading to a question.
Dan Le Batard
All right, please, go ahead, Tony. Zaz, you hear that question right there? Which game are you most into tonight?
Zaz
It's St. John's Duke. It's St. John's duke. That's the game.
Dan Le Batard
Dude.
Tony
This fraud, he's going to the Marlins games. Be watching the NCAA tournament the whole time. This guy's a fraud.
Jess
Or he's lying about watching St. John's Duke.
Mike
He'll be at the domestic beer bar in center field watching him.
Tony
I got a phone, Tony, I'll meet you there.
Dan Le Batard
Dave. Dave, what say you?
Dave
Well, more interesting than what game Tony is going to watch or finds most compelling, here's my fascinating question for you. It's whimsical.
Dan Le Batard
Originally for Montana, though, but now for me, right?
Jess
That's right.
Zaz
A reheat. A reheat for you.
Dave
Were these not men's. Men's basketball matchups, but instead college football matchups? Which game would you find most compelling? Oh, would it be in Alabama, Tennessee, Iowa State? Or do you go back to last night? Iowa, Nebraska is pretty juicy. Illinois, Houston. Sneaky. Good. Arkansas and Arizona. Okay. If it's on it late night, you might sit there and watch it. And Texas, Purdue. Could be a fun one.
Tony
Pretty clearly. Alabama, Michigan.
Dan Le Batard
I think yeah, like I feel like we have to cross off Alabama.
Tony
I love the idea your game. But every matchup you said clear winner. Not as good as Alabama, Michigan, Iowa,
Dave
Nebraska is pretty good.
Dan Le Batard
If I were to take out Michigan. Chris is right. You have to cross off Michigan, Alabama.
Mike
It would be the Citrus bowl.
Dan Le Batard
Maybe Texas, Purdue. Yeah, yeah. You ever heard of Arch?
Mike
Have you seen that photo of Arch doing the play action fake before? No one knew that like the Peyton Manning stiff neck on the play action fake was hereditary until they saw that photo. He looks exactly like him.
Tony
You guys see that? Marshall Manning? Apparently we got a better one.
Roy
Alliteration.
Tony
That's Peyton's actual kid.
Dave
That's who Mike's talking about, right?
Mike
What was that? The photo. And it wasn't Arch.
Dave
Yeah, it's actually Peyton's kid.
Mike
Wow.
Tony
Marshall Manning.
Mike
Then it's directly hereditary.
Dave
Mm.
Zaz
Sass. To answer your question though, it's St. John's Duke. That's the best game of the night.
Dan Le Batard
St. John's Duke is very juicy. I'm rooting hard for St. John's because, you know, who the hell roots for Duke? And I like Patino being in the tournament this long, like Patina. It's fun watching with a team that
Zaz
like can't really shoot. It's like, it's a weird team that's like specifically built for the Big East. It's like they can't really do a lot of things. They like to muck up the game. Duke is. Has been vulnerable at times and I want to see the pressure St. John's gonna put.
Mike
It's a team that once won 17 minutes without scoring correct this season.
Zaz
And Patino threatened to kill himself because they missed free throws. Which is possible obviously because he's a vampire.
Dan Le Batard
I mean the, the hype train. If St. John's wins tonight. Duke is a six and a half point favorite according to DraftKings sportsbook. St. John's wins tonight.
Dave
The.
Dan Le Batard
The. The hype is going to be at a fever pitch heading into the regional final Sunday.
Zaz
Does he come in with the white suit, all white tonight or no? It would be a power move if he did.
Jess
Feels like the night to do it.
Zaz
It's like you're playing Duke. You look across, you got the boozer twins. You got a bunch of five star guys and you look at your team and it's a bunch of ragtag bunch Bad News Bears. He comes in with the cream suit with the red tie. Means business. Zaz, what shirt underneath a cream one?
Mike
Is there any coach that wears the suit? Now, any coach that breaks this new thing of wearing tracksuits.
Zaz
I feel like Mick Cronin was wearing a suit.
Mike
Was he?
Dave
Yeah, he does.
Mike
Yeah.
Dave
All right.
Tony
Good shout.
Mike
That's the answer.
Dan Le Batard
Dan Hurley. Tonight, Dan Hurley wears a suit.
Mike
Oh, yeah. Is that Bill Murray's kid that just got that BC job?
Dan Le Batard
Oh, maybe. I know he was an assistant with UConn.
Mike
Yeah, yeah. He just. I think he's getting the BC job. Dave, what say you?
Tony
He work. He works hard.
Zaz
All right.
Dan Le Batard
Hey, I mean, Dave, you playing rigamortis? What's going on?
Dave
Is that Bill Murray's child? I have no idea. If that's Bill Murray, I would say something.
Jess
Yeah, it is indeed.
Dave
I didn't know what you did.
Mike
Yeah.
Dave
Bill Murray, the actor? Bill Murray, Yes. As a child.
Tony
He has a child.
Mike
Bill Murray, the.
Dave
About the sport of basketball.
Jess
Financier.
Dave
To be that. To be the head coach of a basketball.
Tony
He works hard.
Dave
Remarkable. That's pretty rangy stuff from. From the Murray family.
Zaz
That would have been great.
Dave
15 seconds of actors.
Mike
He's just learning about this.
Dave
Touche.
Episode: The Big Suey: The 'For The Love Of The Game' Security Guard (feat. Jessica Smetana) - March 27, 2026
Broadcasting from the Elser Hotel in downtown Miami, Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, and company offer their trademark blend of irreverent sports and pop-culture talk, this episode diving into:
Featuring Jessica Smetana as a guest, the crew delivers their familiar banter, blending sharp commentary, humor, and social observation.
[02:11–05:20]
[05:54–13:04]
[16:26–19:40]
[20:26–28:49]
[30:47–36:15]
Throughout
This episode weaves together the drama of March Madness, the farcical world of pop star scandals, and the endless delight in loving/mocking the sports-industrial complex. Listeners are treated to sharp observations, playful digs, and genuine debates about fairness, fandom, and who exactly is responsible for viral chaos (security guards, bracketers, or head coaches named Will).
Ideal episode for: fans of chaotic sports storylines, media meta-commentary, NCAA drama, and the absurdist underbelly of celebrity news.