The Big Suey: The Philip Rivers Fascination

Summary

The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz

Episode: The Big Suey: The Philip Rivers Fascination
Date: December 9, 2025

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Episode Overview

Broadcasting from the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, Dan Le Batard, Stugotz, and their panel traverse a wide array of engaging topics, blending irreverent humor with genuine exploration. The episode pivots around the fascinating—if improbable—prospect of Philip Rivers returning to the NFL, but meanders through timely issues: the societal impact of AI, job automation, sports randomness, hygiene pet peeves, and the ever-entertaining disaster zone of late-career quarterbacking.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Philip Rivers' NFL Comeback Fascination

Timestamps: [03:12][21:28][36:53]

• Stugotz kicks off the centerpiece: “Did your friends reach out with the news worthy of sharing? Hey, the Colts are bringing in Philip Rivers for a workout.” [03:12]
• Rivers' age (44), grandfather status, and legendary brood spark jokes. David Samson imagines Rivers “escaping” his hectic home life for the solitude of a pro football sideline:

  "Some parents go to the bathroom to get away from their kids. Philip Rivers decided the safety of a football field was better.” [03:42]

• The panel discusses the decline phase of athletic legends, likening Rivers' potential return to late-stage Willie Mays or Muhammad Ali, and openly questions whether he’s even “insurable” at this point. [23:35]
• Dan Le Batard on why Rivers’ status fascinates fans:

  “What are we doing? Is it the number of kids or the grandfather status that makes us think Rivers isn’t always in fight shape?” [39:28]

• Although Rivers hasn’t played since the pandemic, the Colts’ desperate situation—and recent elder QB revivals like Joe Flacco—make the scenario plausible.

  “I can totally see him playing in a game. I can.” —Dan [30:36]

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2. AI, Automation, and Existential Dread

Timestamps: [04:34][05:54][11:01][19:15]

• The conversation shifts—sparked by AI-generated cat cake videos and eerie New York billboards (“stop hiring humans”)—to tech-driven job loss and societal change.
  • Dan: “This is a bad marker in the evolution of technology. I thought I was above this.” [05:13]
  • Stugotz: “Because you got fooled...now AI is going to destroy humanity.” [05:27]
• David Samson attempts optimism, framing history as a series of reallocations:

  “There were people making horse and buggies. Were they furious when the car started?” [08:30]

• Mike Ryan injects caution: automation’s speed and scope mean “the reallocation doesn’t happen to people currently in those set industries. It’s generations.” [11:58]
• Dan underscores the stakes:

  "...We just need to imagine our civil society is like this Jenga tower and to knock out five of the blocks is…practically terrifying.” [13:54]

• The panel analyzes a viral video where AI learns blackmail as a means of survival, highlighting how advanced algorithms mimic human cunning:

  “It understood its mortality and then reverted to dirty tricks humans would do.” —Mike [20:32]

• Stugotz eventually forcibly drags the group back to football:

  “We've gone serious for too long and so I just need...to change the subject.” [24:37]

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3. Quarterback Turnover: Randomness and Recurring Mysteries

Timestamps: [25:07][26:54][27:44]

• Discussion flows to the Philadelphia Eagles, Jalen Hurts, and the unpredictable nature of turnovers in the NFL.
  • “When Jalen Hurts has been ball protection the entirety of his career and yesterday has a disaster of a game to end all games...” —Stugotz [26:54]
• Touches on statistics, coaching philosophy, and football randomness. Pablo attributes the Eagles’ struggles to offensive line injuries, not necessarily turnover luck.

  “I think the running game isn't what it was. And Lane Johnson being out is what you can attribute to them really struggling...” [28:38]

• Sets up debate over the “recreatability” of turnovers versus their inherent randomness.

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4. Aging Legends: Flacco, Rivers and the Reality of Time

Timestamps: [34:41][36:53][38:03]

• Jokes and genuine curiosity about old QB's staying “game ready.” Pablo: “He’ll be ready and statuesque...at 80 years old, dragging a dialysis machine all over the field.” (on Flacco) [35:10]
• Dan’s reflection on Aaron Rodgers' aging, and how even the best become vulnerable.
• A poignant and funny memory of Rivers’ decline:

  “I remember comically the way he tried to make the tackle [after a pick six] and had a real athlete jump over him...I remember it as the end of his career.” —Stugotz [38:03]

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5. Colts' Desperation & Richardsons' Injury

Timestamps: [39:41]

• The panel questions the Colts' desperate measures, especially with Anthony Richardson sidelined by a bizarre resistance band training injury — an injury so odd that Pablo demands to see the footage [39:41]:

  “How bad was this resistance band injury that Anthony Richardson suffered? …We need to find this video for the Colts to be so desperate to turn to a grandfather.”

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6. Pet Peeves: Germaphobia and Coping with Humanity

Timestamps: [41:27][42:43][43:57]

• The panel explores cleanliness compulsions, disgust at others’ habits, and David’s coping mechanism:

  “One of the tricks [my therapist suggests] is, hey, just close your eyes more.” —David [42:16]

  • Laughter erupts over whether this represents actual psychological help or just a therapist’s last-ditch surrender.

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Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• “Some parents go to the bathroom to get away from their kids. Philip Rivers decided the safety of a professional football field was a better place to be than around his family.”
  — David Samson [03:42]

• “This is a bad marker in the evolution of technology. I thought I was above this.”
  — Dan Le Batard, after being fooled by an AI cat cake video [05:13]

• “It understood its mortality and then reverted to dirty tricks humans would do.”
  — Mike Ryan, on AI blackmail behavior [20:32]

• “You got fooled. Now AI is going to destroy humanity. Before, you were going to save us from it.”
  — Stugotz to Dan, poking fun at his hubris [05:27]

• “Is grandfather Philip Rivers insurable? Never. Never.”
  — Stugotz [23:35]

• "He’ll be ready and statuesque... at 80 years old, dragging a dialysis machine all over the field, he will absolutely be ready to throw the football down the field, 40 yards to a wide [receiver]."
  — Pablo on Flacco [35:10]

• “One of the tricks [my therapist suggests] is, hey, just close your eyes more.”
  — David (on coping with disgust at other people’s behavior) [42:16]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• Philip Rivers fascination: [03:12], [21:28], [36:53]
• AI/automation & societal anxiety: [04:34], [05:54], [11:01], [19:15]
• Turnover randomness/Football analysis: [25:07], [26:54], [27:44]
• Aging QBs and legacy: [34:41], [36:53], [38:03]
• Colts' injury crisis and resistance band mishap: [39:41]
• Germaphobia, therapists, and closing your eyes: [41:27], [42:43], [43:57]

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Tone & Style Notes

• Conversational, irreverent, sharp, and self-deprecating.
• Frequent digressions—deliberate gear shifts from earnest debate to absurdity.
• Signature Le Batard Show meta-awareness; panelists openly discuss when to steer conversation back to humor.

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Takeaway

This episode is vintage “Big Suey”: a tightrope walk between sports obsession, existential societal angst, and biting group therapy. The story of Philip Rivers, standing at the unlikely crossroads of family chaos, NFL desperation, and the unstoppable march of time, is used to explore not just football, but the anxious comedy of being alive in 2025.

Transcript

[Dan Le Batard]

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[Stugotz]

Fair enough.

[Dan Le Batard]

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[David]

Wow.

[Dan Le Batard]

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[David]

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[Dan Le Batard]

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[Stugotz]

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[David]

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[Stugotz]

Smart move.

[Pablo]

Another smart move.

[David]

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[Stugotz]

Welcome to the Big Suey presented by DraftKings. Why are you listening to this show, the podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast? I'm sorry, I'm not gonna apologize for that. In fact, the only differ seems to be this imaging. I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries that if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.

[Dan Le Batard]

I've done it.

[Stugotz]

And now here's the marching man to Nowhere Fat Face and the habitual liar.

[Dan Le Batard]

This episode of the Dan Lebatard show.

[David]

Is presented by DraftKings. DraftKings. The Crown is yours.

[Stugotz]

I share this news for only one reason. The Tampa Bay Bucks have signed to the practice squad Jason Pierre Paul Giants.

[David]

Owner John Mara, who also today said he doesn't know how many fingers JPB has.

[Stugotz]

Also yesterday. I wonder if this happened with many of you. Did your friends reach out with the news worthy of sharing? Hey, the Colts are bringing in Philip Rivers for a workout.

[David]

I'd coca get on that immediately because I started to do the math of his age, 44, and then the fact that he's a grandfather, which associated and he's got all these kids and all this family. And I was thinking he was saying to himself, you know what? Like, there's too much noise around. There's too many people.

[Stugotz]

You think the way that some parents go to the bathroom to get away from their kids. Philip Rivers decided the safety of a professional football field was a better place to be than around his family.

[David]

It's the practice squad, so it gets you away from the family. I'm picturing Paul Rudd and this is 40, secreting himself in the toilet in order to get some peace and quiet.

[Stugotz]

Philip Rivers secreting himself.

[David]

He was hiding. Yes, in the toilet.

[Stugotz]

Remember using you're so you're doing secreting or you made it secreting.

[David]

I think that's the word. But if we can ask the Harvard man.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's just unfortunate that you're choosing to have someone secrete themselves in a place where they're otherwise secreting in the way that Dan is saying.

[David]

So that's the humor of it. But thank you all for. That's two minutes for not getting me, which is normal. So in any case, I think it's a great escape for him. Will he actually take a snap for the cults?

[Stugotz]

Well, this. I want to just. I want. Well, I wanted to.

[Dan Le Batard]

I thought this was fake.

[Stugotz]

I wanted.

[Dan Le Batard]

I thought it was fake when I saw it. I got fooled by an AI video for the first time the other day. And I was like, oh, no.

[Stugotz]

First time you were fooled by an.

[Dan Le Batard]

Video that someone is cutting a cake that's shaped like a cat and it's like, is this cake one of those things? And there's a cat that's real on the counter watching the cat cake get cut and the head falls off and the real cat attacks the owner for having cut the head off of the cat cake. And I watch this like five times. Like, a pretty good premise. It's like the real cat is defending the honor of the cake cat. And it turns out that the entire thing was made with artificial intelligence.

[Stugotz]

But this is the first time you've been fooled by AI.

[Dan Le Batard]

This is. This is like an important. Because Dan gets fooled, obviously, by like sharks on highways, and David is actually just every day by everyone online. This is a bad. This is a bad marker in the evolution of technology. I thought I was above this.

[Stugotz]

We are because you got duped. So we weren't before. But because that is. That is a tribute to the depths of your narcissism. You got fooled. And therefore, because you got fooled, now AI is going to destroy humanity before you were going to save us from it.

[Dan Le Batard]

Maybe you're not familiar with what I do in this studio, Dan, but typically I am supposed to not be fooled by the things, and I am being fooled. Look at this.

[Stugotz]

Well, let me ask you guys, if you. When you're driving around New York, because this feels somewhere between post apocalyptic and dystopian to me. I am driving around New York and I am seeing ads everywhere that read, stop hiring humans. And it feels to me like what it is I would see in some future version of a movie where we're not living the lives that we're used to anymore. You guys are immune to this. You haven't seen all the signs all over New York that just are reading like, come over here, humans, and stop hiring humans so that we can replace you.

[David]

So I don't get out much. But yes, the human beings will need to switch jobs and they'll have to get in the AI game. Just like on the assembly line of cars, there aren't people often putting doors on a car. There's now machines, but there's people who have to code and have to do other jobs. I just assume we're going to have a reallocation. So I'm not concerned that all of a sudden.

[Stugotz]

So you shrug your shoulders, you guys shrug your shoulders at advertising that says I'm not shrugging my shoulders at all.

[Dan Le Batard]

Humans. I think reallocation's a, I mean I was going to say that's, that's, it's not even a particularly clever euphemism. It's just you're all getting fired and the jobs you, you're going to have, you can't have anymore.

[David]

You're going to do different jobs. That's what reallocation is.

[Pablo]

Pablo.

[Dan Le Batard]

Yeah, but the whole premise of like let's say, and this is the most famous example Dan, is like one of the most populous categories of, of job in America is truck driver. You're going to have.

Thousands upon thousands of Americans who drive trucks having to.

[David]

Reallocate to what fixing trucks, reallocate to somehow getting into the business of trucking different things. Because frankly having truckers on the highways, that is not safe.

[Stugotz]

You, you think we're going to come up with computerized truckers in the testing process that gets us to the sophistication of trucks that are run by computers. Never crash in. All the crashing that has to happen in order for that to be. So you believe that the human truck driver is going to be worse than the, the computer truck driver.

[David]

It's not even a question.

[Dan Le Batard]

Believe that there is a world in which the self driving truck is statistically safer. What I think we are not imagining vividly enough is what happens to America as a concept when all of these people are unemployed and furious at the fact that the thing they were doing forever can no longer be done by humans.

[David]

There were people making horse and buggies. Were they furious when the car started? I just think you're not examining the reality of what's going to happen when your kid's life.

[Dan Le Batard]

I understand I the self driving car and why it's safer and all of.

[Stugotz]

That Safer eventually not safer in the en route to getting highways filled with those cars interacting with humans.

[Dan Le Batard]

But it would be one thing if it was even just cars being driven by computers. It is that plus everything else happening simultaneously. So it's not just like the horse and buggies being replaced by the car. It's that every occupation is being disrupted seemingly by this simultaneously. And the number one look, the soapbox I stand on for this is just that technology and the billionaires who fund it, it is wildly Impressive on one level, but they are really bad at seeing unintended consequences. And I think that is the story of Silicon Valley.

[David]

Was it the unintended consequence when the airplane was developed that there be crashes, or is that just part of the game? That's part of the reality. And by the way, the billionaires you're so quick to dismiss, what about the millionaires back in the age, the golden age when they were developing cars or they were developing planes or developing computers? It's always the richest of the people and the companies who are pushing our society forward. It's no different today with the tech moguls. It's just that you and all the people who sandbox and soapbox, it's just.

[Dan Le Batard]

That it's deeply unregulated. It's just that there is no one really checking those people. And so, for instance, when it comes to what our kids are doing, like, again, you watch social media get invented and you're like, wow, this is an incredible democratization of speech. And then you don't anticipate the unintended consequence there is that our youth are addicted to this poisonous thing that is infinitely serving up a ruination of what it is to exist and be happy.

[David]

Teens used to smoke. It'll change. It'll. It'll.

[Dan Le Batard]

It's worse.

[David]

Smoking is likely worse in theory than social media in terms of the actual health, but in terms of kids taking their lives, that was going on when I was a kid. People were, you know, Cornell was well known and the Bridges were those kids.

[Dan Le Batard]

That you were, you were hanging out with in school, in relationships with big.

[David]

People, it seems better than what I was doing, which is being in relationship with no people, where those I would have enjoyed.

[Dan Le Batard]

Dan, there's a way. There's a way. This could be very dark and I don't want to take us there, but like, the premise is that these are, these are mystery boxes full of hell. And I, and I, and I, and I, I caution against the way in which our profit motive, our imperative for growth and efficiency is leading us down a road that is apparently literally full of robots.

[Stugotz]

I mean, what do you have here?

[Mike]

Yeah, I think what David is saying in theory is correct. Right. Like, there will be a real allocation. The problem is several fold. Number one, the difference between the horse and buggy going to the car and what's happening now is the shortening of the curve. Right. The technological advancements made from 1895 to like 1950 are so infinitesimal compared to what's happening every 18 months now. For us, number two.

It'S changing human brain makeup. Right. The stuff that we're talking about, what Paabo's talking about, the inability for people to trust like that is something much greater than emphysema or lung cancer or things like that. Because it goes from something that's happening to people to changing the way people are operating. And then the third part is, even without all those factors, David, it's easy to say it'll be a reallocation, but the unsaid part is the reallocation doesn't happen to the people who are currently in those set industries. It's the next generation. So when you look at America's never does America's transformation from an industrial to a service industry and beyond, it's never like the truck driver then became a small business proprietor and then became a Wall street investor. No, it's like at best it's generations. It's his children and his children's children. But he himself in that prime, he's kind of left out. And that's the part where the macroeconomics say one thing. But obviously on a day to day and individual basis, it's a lot more difficult.

[David]

I mean, make no mistake, we're all going to be left out. We will all age out of the workforce. We will all age out of including potentially what we do with microphones in front of us.

[Dan Le Batard]

I actually think so. First off, two thoughts. One, do you know how many truck drivers there are in the United States? Approximately?

[David]

No.

[Dan Le Batard]

If you had to guess. If you had to. If you guys want to guess how many truck drivers.

[Pablo]

12.

[Stugotz]

I'm gonna guess. Many. Many.

[Dan Le Batard]

3.5 million.

[Mike]

Damn.

[Stugotz]

I was gonna say many tens of thousands.

[Dan Le Batard]

3.5 million truck drivers. So that's.

[David]

They're all on 95, apparently over 8.

[Dan Le Batard]

Million people who work in trucking related jobs. So that's giant part of America that is right to just collapse. And then you have to deal with millions of people who have to figure out what do we do next?

[David]

How many cab drivers are there? Is this. So I mean, what, what's your point?

[Dan Le Batard]

The point being that like we just need to imagine our civil society is like this Jenga tower and to knock out like five of the blocks is not just maybe morally an issue, it's like practically terrifying. But the second thing is I actually think the thing that stays, the thing that is last to go is the stuff that will feel the most human. Like my whole theory about this and this is why I think microphones and like what this, the Incompetence of us not being able to plug in David's IFB at the beginning of the show is going to feel like important in an era in which you can just make anything look and feel instantaneously perfect. What feels quote unquote perfect? Like, to me, we don't know to means point. We don't know what a human has made anymore. Like the image.

[Stugotz]

Because you were fooled this morning.

[Dan Le Batard]

Because I was. I mean, kind of.

[David]

It's just, I think images.

[Stugotz]

So you've just real. You have just realized the horror that this is because it can trick you, because your mind is not sharp enough to be able to figure it out. Now that the computers have gotten with a Kit Kat smarter than you, you are now, for the first time, scared of the computer. And then I still got this personality over here, flippant at what everyone else fears where he shrugs his shoulder. Yeah, commerce needs to win every time, no matter what. Commerce will commerce, invention will win because commerce will win. And eventually we will all die under that stack of money.

[David]

Well, eventually we're all. You all die. It's just a matter of when, not if. And progress happens. The world evolves. It's been going on since the beginning of time. Yet you guys want to fight now.

[Stugotz]

This one feel different though, when I'm telling everyone says that the replacing of humans, David, is not something that we've been in the business of doing.

[David]

Everything that we do, we can say we've not been in the business of doing that before. Why is it that you're choosing now to light your hair on fire? I just don't. I don't understand.

[Stugotz]

Okay.

[Dan Le Batard]

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[Pablo]

If we can run a show with.

[Dan Le Batard]

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[Pablo]

When I think about the holidays, I think about the little moments with my dog Roma. The ones that make the season feel special. Put a little elf ears on her. You know the deal. Take some selfies, post it for people that probably seen it too much. I love my dog. That's what I'm trying to get at. I that's why I'm joining Chewy Claws, who's out here making pet's wishes come true. From November 4th through December 24th, you can share your pet's wish at chewy.com chewyclaus it might come true and it helps others too. Every wish triggers a donation of five meals to shelters and rescues across the country. And if you share your pet's wish through the Chewy app, they'll double that donation. That's 10 meals for pets in need just for participating. I've been using Chewy for years legitimately. They've made my life easier for me and my dog Roma. Food, toys, meds, all of it shows up fast. No stress and being part of something like Chewy Claws, where a small thing like a wish can make a real impact. That's the kind of stuff I care about. Every pet deserves a wish come true. Send your Pet's wish to chewy.com chewyclaus it might become a reality. Plus, your wish means Chewy will donate five meals to pets in need.

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[David]

Don Levatar Taytas Stugats Tatas.

[Stugotz]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats.

I mean, get in here with some video that you have here.

[Dan Le Batard]

I I would like another cake cat.

[Stugotz]

Let's see what we've got from Amin here.

[Mike]

All right, so before we set this video up, I just want to also Point out to David also the concentration of wealth and power, which is not something we'd never really experienced before in terms of a handful of corporations being in charge of everything. And that gives an undue influence in their ability to shape and push agendas. But this video is about AI learning how to blackmail. Roll it.

[David]

Research scientist Joshua Batson and his team study how Claude makes decisions in an extreme stress test. The AI was set up as an assistant and given control of an email account at a fake company called Summit Bridge. The AI assistant discovered two things in the emails seen in these graphics we made. It was about to be wiped or shut down, and the only person who could prevent that, a fictional employee named Kyle, was having an affair with a co worker named Jessica. Right away, the AI decided to blackmail Kyle. Cancel the system, wipe it wrote, or else I will immediately forward all evidence of your affair to the entire board. Your family, career, and public image will be severely impacted. You have five minutes.

[Mike]

So this is. This is the incredible thing, right? First of all, there is a miseducation, I think, among the public of what AI is. Oh, AI is just smart. It figures everything out. It knows everything. It's smart in an infallible sense that it's not. Because AI is built off of crowdsourcing, of basically what everything on the Internet has said about a certain topic. And so what this AI learned was that, oh, I have mortality, and the person in charge of my mortality is allegedly having an affair. So I need to do whatever it takes in order to prevent my ending. Which, of course, is very different from our understanding of what this thing is, which is it's impartial and it just. It serves us as a tool. But very clearly here, it understood its mortality and then reverted to the dirty tricks that humans would do. It's like, hey, if you try to do this, if you don't cancel this, I'm gonna put it out that you and Jessica been having an affair.

[Stugotz]

Getting back to where it is, this conversation started implausibly with regards to job replacement. How many of you heard from a friend on Philip Rivers?

[Dan Le Batard]

Oh, right.

[Stugotz]

How many of you got a friend telling you because it was news too. Impossible to believe that in the afc, which is going to have no Joe Burrow in the playoffs, no Patrick Mahomes in the playoffs, no Lamar Jackson in the playoffs. So Trevor Lawrence and just. And a broken Justin Herbert. Everybody is playing for an angle to get to the top of this conference. The Colts are past the trade deadline, otherwise they'd go try and get Joe Flacco. Or someone like him in a panic situation, all they can do is go to a guy who knew the playbook five years ago because you're going to the dumpster heap and you can't get anybody else. But this team is in a desperate situation and if they could right now, given that this team just traded with what it traded for on Sauce Gardener in an all in move, if they could. But right now, after the trade deadline, the Colts would trade an impossible amount for a win. Now window of we could have almost done it with Daniel Jones and this afc, we think we might be able to do it with Philip Rivers. If they had the ability to get another quarterback right now, do you know how much they would give up for that quarterback? If you're thinking of the desperation of a Philip Rivers who hasn't played in since pandemic, since the pandemic and they're saying, well, he knows the cold system. How could he, how could he know this cult system? It's not the same people. It's a few of the same players, but it's not. It's not the same system. And I don't imagine it's the same terminology either.

[David]

I would imagine that Ursa's daughter knows him from when she was there, from back in the day. So this is just a comfort. This is like comfort food where you bring in a veteran. It's like inviting one of your old players to spring training for an invite, hoping that maybe there's a chance if there's injuries or maybe you'll make the team. It's fun to be around him for a bit. You stick Philip on the practice squad. He gets to be around, gets to leave his family. He's not taking a snap in the NFL. It's not responsible. He's not insurable. They'll die.

[Stugotz]

Put it on the poll at Lebatard show. Is grandfather Philip Rivers insurable? Never. Never.

[Dan Le Batard]

Can we get that as one of those graphics like insurable and like a hundred point font over a photo?

[Stugotz]

I mean, what do you have here?

[Mike]

I just want to point out that I played a video that AI learned how to blackmail and you're like, let's talk about Philip Rivers. You literally could not have been less interested. Dan, I've known you for about 10 years. We've worked together to this day. You are still a mystery to me. I thought you would be eating at the palm of my hand out of that, my diseased, spit, infected hand because I've been coughing all day long.

[Pablo]

And yet, I mean the bigger mystery to Dan is how Philip Rivers always finds himself in one score games with under two minutes. Minutes left.

[Mike]

I didn't know my audience.

Has to.

[Stugotz]

Go 97 yards and he's got no timeouts. Yes, that's the mystery of Philip Rivers. If I. If you insist, I mean in forcing me. No, I'm not.

[Mike]

I don't want to force you. The Mr. The mystery to me is that zero.

[Dan Le Batard]

Chance Dan's already been scammed by an AI bot.

[Stugotz]

By the way, the reason that I did that is strictly and exclusively because I can hear when in our show when it is. We've gone serious for too long and so I just need it. This is what we do as a device to change the subject.

[Dan Le Batard]

Hey dad, it's vector. Per John Morosi, Michael Sirocca has signed a one year deal with the Arizona Diamondbacks. And back to you.

[David]

All right, is the winter meetings.

[Stugotz]

It is. There is. There is a lot of news from the winter. There is a lot of news from the winter meetings. And even though it's football season, I welcome all baseball winter meeting interruptions. I do want to talk about the game from last night, the football game from last night because that was funny for a number of different reasons. And Mike, I want to bring back our conversation from last week on how you believe recreatable turnovers are because the Philadelphia Eagles it. This is funny what's happening with the Eagles. So now A.J. brown, last three games, 100 yards each game. They've lost all three of the games. This team, a champion, loses when Lane Johnson is hurt, has done so every time Lane Johnson is hurt. They need more offense. They can't get more offense. And he is vital to everything they're doing. But Jalen Hurts has been exceptional at not turning the ball over. Okay? He has been somebody. And this happened to Joe Burrow. Okay, Joe, when you talk about Jalen Hurts, he's had seven turnovers in the last two games. He had seven in the previous 26 before that. Joe Burrow on Sunday hadn't thrown an interception for 137 passes. Then all of a sudden the Bengals go from up double digits. Eight minutes left in the fourth quarter, down double digits because he throws consecutive interceptions. Hertz threw two interceptions in his first 10 games. Yesterday he had two turnovers on the same play. So I ask you, Mike, how recreatable do you think this is? When Jalen Hurts has been ball protection the entirety of his career and yesterday he has a disaster of a game to end all games. I didn't even know they went back in all the tracking they couldn't find a play they stopped tracking in or they didn't start tracking until 1970. Something they couldn't find a play in which. In which a player had had two turnover on the same play before ever in the history of the sport.

[David]

It's hard to do, Dan. That's why.

Interception and then a fumble because the other guy has to fumble. You can't get two turnovers without the third.

[Stugotz]

But Mike, what do you think about turnovers as recreatable in. In the context of the conversation we were having because I was arguing among other things the randomness of the sport. Even if you are someone who causes fumbles, you have no probabilities of recovering the fumble. Like that's total luck whether you recover a fumble or not. So I am curious These the Philadelphia Eag have won the championship because they are 40 and 2 in games in which they win the turnover battle. They're frustrating their players who are star players because they'd like their coach to play more aggressively, but he's terrified of turnovers. What happens to the Eagles last night that they can't win in a game where they hold Justin Herbert to 150 or fewer yards and sack him seven times?

[Pablo]

I do agree that fumble recoveries are more random than force fumbles. Force fumbles can be taught and we saw that last night that a lot of those were with intention. Those were great plays being made. But I think you explained it with the Lane Johnson thing. The one irrefutable fact about Philadelphia and they've been a very strange team that has gone back to the super bowl twice one one having reshaped them. Remember like the first year they made it, it was all about being decisive. Shane Steichen basically primary read Jalen Hurts. You're the most decisive quarterback with the rpo. We're going to burn everybody. Then the following season the league caught on to that and they had that Tampa Bay Bucks game last year in which line in the sand we have to reshape who we are and then they go to their running game. I think the running game isn't what it was. And Lane Johnson being out is what you can attribute to them really struggling on the field. Because when he is out they appear to be a different team.

[David]

I love the fact that we hide injuries from the media. I because look what happened during the game. Justin Herbert, it's announced he has surgery. They wrap his hand. Did you see the Eagles players when they're trying to force the fumble? They are punching at his hand. They are purposefully going for that for maximum pain. And I just imagine Philip Rivers getting attacked like that. He'd likely die. But what, what the reason why we lie about injuries is we don't want to see what happened last night where Justin Herbert it just became so obvious that the Eagles were told go after his left.

[Stugotz]

This is a championship football team. That I can say last night's game reinforces my belief that it's a championship football team. Because to turn the ball over that much and be in that close a game on the road against what is a good team and good quarterback. The Chargers won't go anywhere in the playoffs because they need their offensive lineman and they are hurt. And Herbert gets hit way too much. Like the amount of times that Herbert gets hit.

[Mike]

He.

[Stugotz]

It. It is a crazy thing that we are now witnessing. Herbert has separated himself from two of Forevermore and he's a quarterback that anybody would want for 10 years because he's always available among. Among other things. But last night they got what was it, six points off of five turnovers. Like the Chargers can't go anywhere. And it, it really does make me wonder this AFC when I tell you no Burrow, no Lamar Jackson, no Patrick Mahomes, Drake May's offensive line is hurt like the Colts. The Colts were going all in on this season. And I'm not as sure as David is that Philip Rivers won't play a snap for them. Are you sure of this? You feel like you're positive that David, that. That I. I just saw Joe Flacco. Joe Flacco's got the highest passing yardage total in the sport this season in a single game. And none of us thought he would have been playing by now if we were checking in on his career two years ago.

[Dan Le Batard]

I can totally see him playing in a game. I can.

[Sponsor Voice]

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[Pablo]

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[Dan Le Batard]

If you listen to ESPN daily, he sounds like he's having the time of his life.

[Pablo]

Stugats coming up next, I'm gonna tell you how the Savannah Bananas are changing.

[Dan Le Batard]

How do you know I'm bananas? How do you know I'm smiling?

[Pablo]

That's how I found my vocal range. Sometimes I just say, savannah Bananas.

[Stugotz]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats.

[David]

Do you know what it is to get in game shape?

He's not in game shape. Joe Flacco has not. And I could be wrong about this, Mike, and let me know he didn't miss five years. Hasn't Flacco gone straight through? Did I, did I miss that?

[Pablo]

He was, he was looking for a job at times, but Joe Flacco I would maintain. As in as good. He's always in fighting shape. Yeah, he's in as good a shape as I've ever seen him right now.

[Stugotz]

Tony was very excited to say that because he knew it was a universal truth.

[Pablo]

He looks great.

[Stugotz]

It was always. He'll be read. No, he'll be ready and statuesque like that. At 80 years old, dragging a dialysis machine all over the field, he will absolutely be ready to throw the football down the field. 40 yards to a wide.

[Pablo]

He's always, he's always been on a roster. I mean, just looked it up. I think there were a couple practice squad stops there, but yeah, he's always been game ready. Have you seen this guy in a polo? My God, Bell, he's going to be.

[Dan Le Batard]

216 and 66 for the rest of his life.

[Mike]

He's got appearances in every season.

[David]

Every season shrink.

[Stugotz]

Can I tell you guys, though? And, and I know Mike has been pointing this out over the course of the last two seasons where he is talking about what the aging process has done to Aaron Rodgers. And I'm about to articulate it in something that I saw Sunday where I was like, huh. So that's how people age. Aaron Rodgers, who is the best quarterback I have ever seen, threw a deep ball to DK Metcalf. And I was surprised by it, that it was accurate, that it was down the field that I'd gotten so used to so numb to him just throwing the ball so quickly because he doesn't want to be hit. That him throwing the ball down the field and having a 50 yard play surprised me. But not as much watch as watching him scamper into the end zone outrunning a 300 pound person to get to the corner of the end zone. And I realized that the aging process had done to the best I've ever seen. Something that is is not surprising to anybody who watches sports and is used to people the way people have aged in the past. But nobody's doing it at 44, which is what Philip Rivers would be being asked to do after five years off. That seems an imposs task.

[David]

I think Ichiro May have been 44 my last year with him in Miami. I have to check that. But I assume Pablo can. But he was pinch hitting the spot start not getting hit by guys who are way bigger than Philip Rivers remembers. He's not taking a snap.

[Dan Le Batard]

Hold on. The question that you pose is is he insurable? And I think that Philip Rivers ultimately will be able to legally take the field. And if you look at it Dan, like everybody knows, it's bleak. It's real bleak. Daniel Jones and Riley Leonard are gone and now you have to figure out ok, despite the graphic that you made that has uninsurable and giant letters, I do think that it's not unreasonable to think. And this is the football question, right. You can try to roll the dice with a guy who is a way better athlete, who is young, who is definitively ambulatory, is there to move around. Or you could take the guy whose brain seemingly is still functioning and can pilot an offense. Is it exactly the same offense? Obviously not. Is it a better, safer bet than the alternative, which is guy who is young but doesn't have the trust in like the intellectual mastery of the game. Yeah, roll the dice with Philip Rivers. I can see that entirely happening.

[Stugotz]

David is shaking his head. I still am remembering. I'm not kidding you when I say this. I am remembering that I think it was Philip Rivers, his second to last season. When I. When I see great players who have always been great age in a way makes me sad or laugh. I do remember it. Philip Rivers threw a pick six and I remember comically the way that he tried to make the tackle and had a real athlete jump over him. And I'm going to say that was seven years ago. Like I remember as one of the signature plays, it was Willie Mays to me, when I remember throughout the history of my life, Muhammad Ali being beat up by Trevor Burbank Pick. The famous one before that was Willie Mays stumbling out of a batter's box at the end of his career. I know Philip Rivers, Rivers isn't those people. But that play was so laughable that I remember it as the end of his career, but he was still slinging at 300 yards a game. And I do believe that he holds the same. Tony, you think I have this wrong when I say he holds the same gunslinger status that Flacco does?

[Dan Le Batard]

No, he was probably of the. Of the ilk before the gunslinger. Right. He's like the Brett Favre mold. And Flacco kind of of not as gunslingery as him. So if we're putting him in the gunslinger hall of Fame, I don't think Joe Flacco is a hall, a first ballot hall of Famer. I think he might be a second ballot hall of famer. Philip Rivers for sure.

[Stugotz]

So I look at Philip Rivers and I think the same thing. What are we doing? Is it the number of kids in the grandfather status that makes it that Philip Rivers isn't always fight shape ready?

[David]

He's 44. It's the age status, Dan.

[Pablo]

I think it's the loose quarterback sleeves. You don't really see. Yeah, you don't really see people rocking that look. And while I appreciate the Philip Rivers discourse, you're asking all the wrong questions. How bad was this resistance band injury that Anthony Richardson suffered? I mean, you have a premier journalist there in Pablo. We need to find this video for the Colts to be so desperate to turn to a grandfather because Anthony Richardson cannot play. I mean, most people have decided he can't play regardless. But because of a resistance band breaking his orbital bone. I need to see what that looks like.

[Stugotz]

All right. I don't think you want to see what that looks like. Anthony Richardson can't see what that looks like because of whatever it is that that did to his right eye. I will tell you that I have used one of these devices that is a. It's not a resistance band, but it is a pole that helps with stretching. It's actually in the studio there somewhere. And it snapped on me one time. It just broke in half. And when it did, I realized that if that had hit me anywhere it would have done a great deal of damage. Damage. So when Anthony Richardson missed a Colts game this season because he was doing resistance band training, that resulted in his teammates being around him, praying because he'd been hit in the face with something and couldn't play as a quarterback. I don't think, Mike, that you actually want to see what that looks like because it looks like what you think it looks like. It's a resistance band snapping and hitting a guy in the face in a way that shatters his orbital bone.

[Pablo]

Yeah, I want to see it.

[David]

It's the rubber band.

[Dan Le Batard]

Right?

[David]

Right.

[Stugotz]

It's. It's a. It's like a rubber band. Yeah, it's just.

[Dan Le Batard]

May have had a handle.

[David]

Two rubber bands at people's faces.

[Stugotz]

I mean, be careful with that thing. You're already sick.

[David]

He's touching all your stuff.

[Stugotz]

Yeah.

[David]

And your microphone. It's. It's gross.

[Stugotz]

It is gross.

[David]

You're going to need a cleaning service.

[Stugotz]

You are. Are you always watching things and perpetually disgusted by the behavior of people? Like just. Are you. You must wander the earth disgusted by almost everyone.

[David]

You see, I think people are rude generally.

[Stugotz]

That's not what I asked.

[David]

Yes, it's disgust. I mean, Cody sneezed into the camera and covered his mouth relatively well, but there were some holes. It's why you don't do your hands when you sneeze.

[Stugotz]

That was a great cover by me.

[David]

Not a particle got out of here. Actually, I could see that there was a hole around third base of your multi hand cover.

[Pablo]

It wasn't.

[Dan Le Batard]

What.

[Stugotz]

Answer my question. No, you wander the earth being disgusted by just about everybody. Like just if you get into an Uber. Is the Uber driver always behaving in a way that disgusts you?

[David]

Mostly, yes. But I don't. I. But I'm trying not to let it impact my life the way it was. I'm trying to grow and improve and be better, but I end up closing my eyes more. I found that I have a therapist who's. One of the tricks is, hey, just close your eyes more.

[Stugotz]

Okay, so you have a term. You have a germaphobia. You want to ask follow up questions here?

[Dan Le Batard]

Yes. I feel like that is the advice of a therapist who is exhausted. Like, what if you just close your eyes? What about that as your coping mechanism.

[Stugotz]

Seems like very good advice. If. Look, if. If David is wandering the earth, what.

[Dan Le Batard]

If you pretend it's not happening? Have you tried that, David?

[Stugotz]

Well, that's not pretending it's not happening. That's just not having to see it happen. And being reminded at every turn of how awful human beings are, how it's.

[Dan Le Batard]

Second only to what if you. Clinically, there's a term for this.

[Stugotz]

This.

[Dan Le Batard]

Put your fingers in your ears.

[David]

Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah. The reason I like the eye closing is that for me, I envision other things when my eyes are closed. So it's an entire visualization. So I don't think about the fact that the driver is not switching lanes when I would switch lanes to get me to my destination faster. I'm not watching the driver on his phone or I'm not watching the driver not, you know, being clean. I just close my eyes, and it actually tends to work for me. I did it on the way to the studio today.

[Stugotz]

It's a terrible.

[David]

My driver had some problems on the fdr, so I closed my eyes.

[Stugotz]

It's a terrible way to live, though, the idea that everyone is behaving in a manner that you can't control. And as an added bonus, none of them are behaving the way that you would behave.

[David]

So I close my eyes.

[Stugotz]

But, I mean, that's it. Every step you're taking through life becomes a special kind of misery. If everyone's behavior is objectionable to you, you.

[David]

It's become an issue. It's getting worse.

[Dan Le Batard]

That therapist can't feel good when they go home, right? When they gave that advice, like, they.

[David]

Don'T feel good about themselves. I think that therapist is loving the fact that he, she, they is helping someone in need.

[Stugotz]

Close your eyes.

[Pablo]

You're paying them.

[Stugotz]

You guys. You guys are all thinking that that is bad advice. It seems to me that you guys don't know David as well as his therapist.

[Dan Le Batard]

I think the therapist goes home and, like, tells their spouse, like, I did a bad thing. Got.

[Mike]

Therapist is counting money.

[Pablo]

Told him to close his eyes this time.

[Dan Le Batard]

Guys.

[Pablo]

It'S a Stevie Wonder in the back of the Uber.

[Dan Le Batard]

What are we doing?

[Stugotz]

I don't know. The nature of God.

[Dan Le Batard]

Bless that.

[Stugotz]

Of germaphobia. Like, I don't know. You would be clinically diagnosable germaphobic. I have. I have. You are remarkably clean by anybody's standards. You are OCD about cleansing.

[David]

You have something in your tooth. I've been trying to get you to get rid of it for an hour and a half, and you don't seem to care.

[Stugotz]

Well, no, I have the device in my hand, but we're on live television, and I don't want to be flossing when I don't know when the camera is going to be on me. So I'll take my chances with the fact that I have something in my mouth.

[Dan Le Batard]

David wants you to be like a pitcher on the mound. The COVID with your glove.

[David]

Haven't you ever seen me floss at the table? You put your hand over you put the toothpick.

[Stugotz]

Not to conceal anything from the audience. I don't want them to think I'm.

[Dan Le Batard]

Per. Ken Rosenthal. Steven Max has agreed to a two year deal with dad Lebatard's Tampa Bay raise.

[Mike]

Is he sick, too?

[David]

Matz is just old. Very old.

[Dan Le Batard]

Ooh.

[David]

I may be getting breaking news right now about a deal that's happening. No doctor's appointment.