The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz
Episode: The Big Suey: The Tiers of Tears (feat. Dianna Russini)
Date: November 11, 2025
Location: Elser Hotel, Downtown Miami
Guests: Dianna Russini (NFL Insider, The Athletic/Scoop City)
Overview
This episode dives into a blend of NFL analysis, parenting hilarity, and signature offbeat banter. Dan, Stugotz, Greg Cote, and crew are joined by Dianna Russini to debate the status of top NFL teams, the challenges facing certain franchises, and Dianna's unconventional (and escalating) parenting techniques. The group caps things off by creating a definitive ranking—the “Tiers of Tears”—for every way a person can cry, all while maintaining the show’s trademark blend of irreverence and insight.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Are the Bills’ and Dolphins’ Super Bowl Windows Closed?
[01:35–03:52]
- The hosts react to ESPN echoing a hot topic: Is the Bills’ Super Bowl window closed?
- Dan Le Batard: Skeptical, but acknowledges the Bills’ struggles with running and run defense.
- Stugotz: Still bullish on both Bills and Dolphins.
- Dianna Russini: "It is not closed, but I'm now very curious about the Dolphins schedule because I'm in Greg's camp here. I think the Dolphins can win the Super Bowl." [02:34]
- Notes the Dolphins' easy remaining schedule and improved defense.
- Outlines the Bills’ trade deadline failures—a lack of run game, no key WR acquisition, and mounting pressure on Josh Allen as worrisome.
- “We are now left with Josh Allen trying to make magic, which is what we saw him trying to do, and it’s just not enough.” [03:50, Russini]
2. Bills’ Trade Deadline Frustrations & NFL WR Market
[03:52–06:47]
- Discussion of rumors that the Bills offered "a one and a three" for Miami WR Jalen Waddle.
- Russini clarifies: The Dolphins weren’t seriously shopping Waddle.
- Describes GM Brandon Beane’s aggressive—but ultimately fruitless—approach at the deadline. Other teams used the Bills' interest for leverage.
- “He looked partially tired because it was an exhausting process... but obviously annoyed.” [06:05, Russini]
3. Brian Daboll’s Firing & What Makes a Good NFL Head Coach
[06:47–10:57]
- Dan asks why the public cares about Brian Daboll’s firing given his ordinary coaching record.
- Stugotz: Attributed to New York media market hype.
- Russini: “Unfortunately, the reality is Brian is a good offensive coordinator. He is not a great head coach because so much comes with it.” [08:16]
- Potential coaching candidates discussed: Anthony Weaver, Lou Anarumo, and the “leader of men” archetype.
- “I think they need to look at New England. You get the leader of men and you get the really good offensive coordinator.” [10:46, Russini]
4. Dianna Russini’s Escalating Parenting Tactics
[10:57–20:22]
- Comic highlight: Russini describes “calling Santa" to threaten her misbehaving (ages 3 & 4) children.
- “It only works for a week or two. And then they're like, ‘That’s not Santa, that's Grandpa.’” [11:36, Russini]
- Has also threatened to “call the police" and, escalating further, puts her kids outside in 20-degree weather, warning they’ll be “raised by deer.”
- "It’s 20 degrees, so it’s really cold in New Jersey, and we have a lot of deer... Put the trains away, you’re gonna live with the deer.” [12:25, Russini]
- Panel debates the morality and escalating absurdity of these tactics, with much laughter.
Notable Quotes:
- Dan Le Batard: “You’re living with hyena. You’re living with hyena.” [18:40]
- Diana Russini: “He encourages it. Like, ‘I dare you to put me outside.’ And I put him out there and he looks through the window and I take the eggs and I’m like, ‘I got your eggs.’” [18:43]
5. Patriots Rebuilding and Energized Vibe
[20:26–21:50]
- Russini notes the Patriots are “ahead of schedule” in their rebuild and describes the rare, palpable optimism in New England, typically known for its “wilderness” vibe.
- “It’s like, it’s electric up there. They’re energized…” [20:31, Russini]
6. Eagles & Packers: Offensive Frustrations & Defensive Feats
[21:50–24:46]
- Discussion of the Eagles’ offensive struggle after a bye week, despite a road win in Green Bay.
- Russini points out AJ Brown’s underutilization: “A.J. Brown, three targets again, you know, like, what is this going to turn into by the end of the season?” [24:14]
- Start-of-the-day stat: Packers have allowed <40 points and <800 yards in three losses, a first since 1940. [22:42–23:55]
7. The Best Eagles Player is Lane Johnson?
[25:34–26:46]
- Russini emphatically states Lane Johnson is both “the best player on offense” and, per her Eagles sources, “it is not even questioned. It's always Lane Johnson.” [26:01]
- Debates ranking of A.J. Brown vs. other Eagles stars.
8. AJ Brown Trade Rumors & Patriots’ Offseason Moves
[26:46–27:55]
- Russini hears “there was some chatter” on AJ Brown’s trade availability; strongly rebuffed by Philly unless it was a “blow you away deal.”
- Patriots had limited contact, but a possible fit in the future.
9. Rapid-Fire: NFL Quarterbacks & The Future
[31:28–34:35]
- Joe Burrow: Unlikely November return. “The hope has been December this whole time.” [31:31, Russini]
- Kyler Murray in Arizona: "I do believe so," re: writing on the wall. “I think we're seeing it right. They're showing us and telling us what direction they're going in…” [31:44]
- Kyler Murray's Market: "There's going to be plenty of teams that are going to be looking for quarterback next year..." [32:17]
- Rookie QB Rankings: Russini ranks Drake May, Caleb Williams, Jaden Daniels. Praises Williams’ “clutch gene.” [32:49]
- Dan: “You just dismounted with a diarrhea of cliches. Clutch Gene.” [33:24]
10. Tiers of Tears: Definitive Crying Rankings
[35:05–37:46]
- The crew builds a list of every type of cry:
- Sniffling, whimpering, bawling, “shower cry,” “car cry,” “crocodile tears,” “Noshon Moreno tear,” etc.
- Russini argues: “The private version of it is always gonna be the worst... The shower cry is the worst because the water camouflages all my tears.” [37:01, Russini]
- Show debates if a “car cry” might actually trump the “shower cry.”
11. Mad Dog Russo’s Rant on the Government Shutdown (and Other Absurdities)
[39:42–44:49]
- An extended, fiery, and hilarious diatribe from Mad Dog on air-traffic control failures, hearing-aid-wearing travelers stuck at MIA, and the President’s questionable NFL commentary with Jonathan Vilma.
- “I got the President sitting there with freaking Vilma. Break it down. To 2003. Same. I mean, you can’t make this stuff up.” [40:38, Russo]
- Stugotz: “Whether it’s flying or it’s frying…” [43:00]
- Group analyzes how Russo makes himself laugh mid-rant, and the poetic absurdity of his word choices.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
Diana Russini on the Bills:
- "We are now left with Josh Allen trying to make magic, which is what we saw him trying to do, and it’s just not enough." [03:50]
On Parenting Escalation:
- “It’s 20 degrees so it’s really cold in New Jersey, and we have a lot of deer in our backyard... Put the trains away, you’re gonna live with the deer.” [12:25, Russini]
- “For every parent watching... It's the between the hours of four and probably seven o'clock and you're trying to get them fed and there's a million things going on and everyone is losing their minds.” [17:52, Russini]
On Eagles’ Real MVP:
- “[Lane Johnson is] the best player on offense for the Philadelphia Eagles... It’s always Lane Johnson.” [25:47–26:01, Russini]
Mad Dog on the Government:
- "You all go to hell. Every single one of you." [40:35, Russo]
Segment Timestamps
- [01:35] — NFL talk: Bills/Dolphins debate starts
- [02:20] — Dianna Russini joins, weighs in on Bills/Dolphins Super Bowl hopes
- [03:52] — Bills’ WR options/trade deadline
- [06:47] — Why is Brian Daboll’s firing a big deal?
- [10:57] — Dianna’s parenting: Santa, the police, and the deer
- [12:25] — “Live with the deer” story
- [20:26] — Patriots energized and ahead of schedule
- [21:50] — Eagles offense/Packers defense discussion
- [25:34] — Lane Johnson: Best right tackle in football
- [31:28] — Burrow/Kyler Murray/rookie QBs rapid-fire
- [35:05] — The Tiers of Tears list
- [39:42] — Mad Dog’s government rant
Tone
Conversational, irreverent, sharp, and always ready to slip from deep NFL analysis into off-the-wall hijinks. Russini holds her own amid constant jokes, personal anecdotes, and sports hyperbole.
For New Listeners
Even if you missed this episode, you’ll walk away knowing the crew’s take on NFL panic buttons, Dianna Russini’s legendary parenting escalation, and the show’s ability to twist everyday dilemmas (crying, trading, travel disasters) into comedic gold. The unique “Tiers of Tears” ranking alone is a highlight—perfect for a group that finds as much meaning in the absurd as in the X’s and O’s.
