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Dan LeBatard
You're listening to Giraffe Kings Network.
Stugotz
This episode is brought to you by Amazon Prime. There's nothing sweeter than baking cookies during the holidays. With Prime, I get all my ingredients delivered right to my door, fast and free. No last minute store trips needed. And of course, I blast my favorite holiday playlist on Amazon Music. It's the ultimate soundtrack for creating unforgettable memories. From streaming to shopping. It's on Prime. Visit Amazon.comprime to get more out of whatever you're into.
Mike Ryan
This episode is brought to you by aws.
Tony
Amazon Q Business is the generative AI assistant that can securely understand your business.
Mike Ryan
Data, summarize results, and streamline tasks.
Tony
Learn what Amazon Q Business can do.
Mike Ryan
For you@aws.com LearnMore welcome to the Big.
Jessica
Sui presented by DraftKings.
Stugotz
Why are you listening to this show?
Jessica
A podcast that seems very similar to the other Dan LeBatard podcast. I'm sorry, I'm not gonna apologize for that. In fact, the only difference seems to be this imaging.
Stugotz
I have been tempted in restaurants just walking past tables to grab somebody's fries if they're just there. That hasn't happened to you guys.
Jessica
I've done it. And now here's the marching man to Nowhere Fat Face and the Habitual Liar.
Billy
Today's episode is sponsored by DraftKings. Stay tuned because you'll hear more about DraftKings and all it has to offer throughout the show. DraftKings. The Crown is yours.
Rose
There was no need for pepper spray to be rain down on me. Oh, hard time. Left eye injury. Ohio State stops drama. You lost. That's the deal. The video clearly shows with my eye almost blinding. There's Harry and Lucy laughing.
Jessica
Baby, I can tell you that I'm pissed.
Stugotz
They froze with the spray.
Jessica
Oh, she sounded like a goose who.
Stugotz
Stepped on of heals.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah.
Stugotz
Even though Rose was in Doom.
Jessica
Ms. Harry and Lucy laughing.
Rose
Even though I wasn't doomed. There's Harry and Lucy laugh.
Stugotz
Wow. I've got a shameful confession. A couple of them around this song. One I I can't tell what some of the lyrics are, which hurts me because I am so moved with that song that I will tell you I have not felt music like that in about five years. Where it just really reaches me, her pain of like, oh no, why did they pepper spray Rose? And in back row, I'm looking at Lucy and she's gazing at the heavens with a radiant smile on her face at her friend being pepper sprayed.
Dan LeBatard
It was funny. And look, Rose was in pain for about 10 minutes. And then it was just funny. I, I think Rose is a phenomenal singer. However, I have become used to it because she sings all the time. And I don't actually love that because we'll be in the car, I'll be playing music and Rose will be singing a completely different song than what we're listening to in the. She will be singing a different song, usually Florence and the Machine. And we have to say, hey, Rose, can you stop?
Stugotz
All right, Lucy, let me. Help me right now produce a live. What I'm trying to do here, a live radio and television moment, okay? Help me do this, produce this segment with me because I've got Rose out here. We're a bit of a gorilla outfit, okay? We're telling Ricky Williams yesterday that he's got a rain down holy hell on the University of Texas so that you can get into a game. You said that.
Dan LeBatard
I didn't.
Stugotz
I know I said that. We got Cuban Santa over at Flanagan's over here and he might steal your toys. He might take your gift cards. He wants your cash. I don't think we're doing this legally or. Well, so far. And I don't trust the technology. And his mustache and beard don't work. Right. But Rose is holding the camera and he's in front of the camera. Can we flip flop them so I can ask Rose some questions here? And we're trying to do a toy drive at Flanagan's. We're trying to get people out there in the next couple of hours. Can I talk to Rose, Lucy, and try to make you giggle. Oh, thank you. This is going to be so good. So, Lucy, here's. Look how happy. Okay. Yes, please just. I want Lucy cam here. I want to isolate. Please give me all Lucy cam here just as she smiles and looks at Rose. Because the question I want to ask Rose. Thank you, Rose, for helping us in production from what I'm imagining is a puddle in a parking lot. Because this is not the most glamorous Flanagan's, but it's one of the legendaries and. Rose, can you hear me okay?
Rose
Oh, yeah, I can hear you.
Stugotz
Okay. Can you say the name, please, of the famous. The Italian name of the person who has been accused of killing a CEO in the street over health care symbolism.
Rose
Luigi Migiani.
Stugotz
Okay.
Jessica
Nailed it.
Stugotz
That was better. It was better than you were doing yesterday. I think you've been practicing. I think you've been cheating for this moment. Can. Can. Can you try again? I want to. Can you try again?
Rose
Luigi Migiani?
Billy
Can you be worse?
Rose
Luigi Mijiani. Luigi Mijiani.
Stugotz
Yes.
Jessica
Yeah.
Billy
There. There he is.
Dan LeBatard
There you go.
Billy
Now you get it.
Jessica
Be worse.
Billy
Yes. Thank you.
Stugotz
Okay. Thank you, Rose. I appreciate it. Luigi Mangione.
Billy
Now we're getting it.
Rose
They want Torina.
Stugotz
Luigi Mangioni.
Rose
Luigi Minini.
Stugotz
Luigi. Luigi Mangioni.
Rose
Luigi Mignonic.
Billy
I think she nailed it.
Stugotz
Yeah.
Rose
Manjonic, bro.
Jessica
Let's try this one.
Stugotz
I'm Spanish.
Rose
I. I speak Italian.
Jessica
Eric Mangini.
Rose
Oh, that's fascinating. Eric Magini.
Stugotz
Luigi Mangione.
Rose
Luigi Magicone.
Billy
Frank Catalinato.
Jessica
That's a tough one.
Rose
Frank Frankeva. Juenstalo.
Jessica
Good.
Rose
Wait, say that again.
Billy
Franco.
Jessica
Yeah.
Rose
Francavon.
Jessica
Yeah.
Mike Ryan
Rose, did you know Travis Homer's a bear?
Jessica
What?
Mike Ryan
Got it.
Rose
What?
Stugotz
Luigi Mangioni.
Rose
Luigi Manioni.
Billy
Come visit her at the Flanagans in Coconut Grove. Drop off a toy. Don't just visit her. That'd be weird.
Stugotz
Luigi Mangioni.
Rose
Luigi Mangin.
Jessica
That's how you do it.
Rose
There you go.
Jessica
Adrian Wojornowski.
Billy
When sue can't even say it, it's tough, right?
Rose
Adrian wins. Say it again. Sorry.
Jessica
Adrian Wojnarowski.
Rose
I think Agent Wolf Zinlayski.
Jessica
Yeah.
Mike Ryan
This is fun. She has an accent.
Billy
She has an accent.
Stugotz
That's the game we're playing. Right on the line. That is the game. Right on it. And bring us your toys.
Billy
At least we're being subtle with it, though. That's where we earn.
Stugotz
So subtle. Rose, hand the microphone to Cuban Santa Claus over there. Bring him your cash, your gift cards and your gifts for toys. Your toys for kids.
Jessica
In 45 minutes, though, when they open.
Stugotz
Yes. So, Tony, take. Tell people to come on out. This is an style radio Scotch. You remember when we used to do this?
Jessica
Oh, I love them.
Stugotz
Yes. It's a radio remote. In the streets of Miami. Gather around, Miami. We're asking for your toys. Come meet Cuban Santa Tony. Today we are at the Flanagans in Coconut Grove. The famous one, the. There it is. Look at that. Look at that. Tony's top five. Rose, get behind the camera. Tony's top five. We're going. We're going live. So we got toy drive and live content that Mike Shure was making fun of yesterday. Man, that's a high compliment. Guys, we skipped past those around here. Mike Shure knows of Tony's top five and he thinks it's ridiculous that Tony's top five has such basic observations. And I accused Mike Schur of not getting the show right. I accused Mike Schur. He was insulted. Mike Shur, a comedy genius. A giant he did not get the show because, of course, Tony's top five are the most obvious things. Of course. He's at a Flanagan's parking lot. He's around puddles. He's asking for toys, and he's giving you.
Jessica
Those are puddles of pee.
Stugotz
No. Come on, Dan.
Jessica
I am telling you, I love Flanagans.
Stugotz
We're doing a good thing.
Jessica
It's a toy drive. Bring your toys, bring your cash. Bring everything you have.
Billy
Okay, Unplugged the decor, the decorative thing behind Tony by mistake.
Jessica
I have spent so many nights in that Flanagan.
Billy
I mean, roaches unplug something that does not belong to her. At Plan against Jesus.
Stugotz
That's not part of our promotion. That just does. Look, Flanagan gave us a space in a parking lot. We're collecting toys. Don't make us look like fools. Go support Tony. Get some. Look, take our incompetence. Ride it into the sky. If you support this kind of content live on television, capable of falling into a puddle and electrocuting. Tony. Bring your toy. Save Cuban Santa's life.
Billy
She's got it, man. She really does. We were trying to force it, and we probably fell on the wrong side of it. And then she's just organically making magic on her own.
Stugotz
No. Look at her. I missed that. I've not seen that as video content. I have not seen that since Billy film.
Mike Ryan
Get out of the way.
Stugotz
No, Tony, get out of the way.
Billy
This is her segment now.
Stugotz
Tony, get out of the way.
Jessica
Stay right there.
Stugotz
Get out of the way.
Mike Ryan
Can't see Tony anymore.
Billy
Podcaster's got to take our word for this one.
Dan LeBatard
She's my favorite person on the planet. Plug it back in, Rose. No, no, don't. Plug it back in, Rose. You got this.
Stugotz
Oh, my gosh.
Billy
Oh, this is great. All right, Tony can come back.
Mike Ryan
All right, Tony, come on back.
Billy
She's legitimately pleading for help.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah, she lost her hat, too.
Mike Ryan
Tony, you there?
Jessica
There we go.
Mike Ryan
All right, Tony, give it to us.
Cuban Santa
All right, well, Tony's top five. Where's Tony's top five? Damn. Thank you. All right, Tony's top five is brought to you by branches.
Billy
Give that shirt to Tug. You're gonna hate that visual.
Jessica
You might want to get up.
Mike Ryan
You're better now. Better now.
Billy
All right. Sorry about that, Tony. We have to look out for our guy.
Mike Ryan
We have a Jeremy song we can play.
Cuban Santa
All right, number five.
Jessica
Go ahead, Tone.
Cuban Santa
It was nice to see the vestiges of the Aaron Rodgers to devonte Adams connection this week. Like the ghost of Christmas past, it was Fun.
Jessica
I hate them.
Cuban Santa
Is Dan there? Is he alive?
Jessica
He's on the floor. He's laughing at Rose. So let's move on to number four, Tony. So you were excited about Devonte Adams, Aaron Rodgers. They turned back the clock. It made me want them both to come back next year. Yeah.
Cuban Santa
It was just nice to see, like, oh, that's what it used to look like. That's right. That's what it was supposed to look like. Gotcha. Okay. It was fun.
Jessica
Yep.
Cuban Santa
Number four. Lions in the bad spot of losing not only the battle, but did they also lose the war? Makes you think. A lot of guys got injured during that Bills game. David Montgomery out for the season. Couple D linemen, couple corners. All of a sudden, that team's not as deep as it used to be.
Jessica
It's a good loss, though, Tom.
Cuban Santa
It is. It's the loss you want at this time.
Mike Ryan
He lost, like, six guys.
Jessica
Yeah, but it allows Dan. It doesn't matter. Good loss. It allows him to humble his team and hit the reset button.
Mike Ryan
It's the time to get hurt, too. Headed into the playoffs.
Billy
This is when you want to get hurt.
Mike Ryan
Yeah.
Billy
Now you have three, four weeks to circle the wagons.
Mike Ryan
Memory's out for the year.
Billy
Well, but is it the full year?
Jessica
Never a good time.
Mike Ryan
There's only two left in the year.
Cuban Santa
He has to have mcl. He's out for, like, six months.
Billy
Well, he can achieve all things through Christ.
Jessica
Number three, Tony.
Cuban Santa
Yes. Yes. But not this one. All right, number three. I can't wait for the Chiefs to pull off a Christmas miracle by making Carson Wentz look like the mvp. Now that Patrick Mahomes is hurt, Billy.
Jessica
Has some thoughts on Carson Wentz and Nick Foles.
Mike Ryan
That's for later.
Cuban Santa
Really?
Mike Ryan
We're gonna go full circle later.
Billy
She's just laughing to himself about those thoughts. Apparently, Foals circle.
Jessica
Talk about it later. We'll discuss it later. Carson Wentz has a chance to go full circle, but we'll talk about it later. Number two, Tone.
Cuban Santa
Full circle. Yeah.
Jessica
Yeah.
Cuban Santa
No, I like that.
Jessica
Yep.
Cuban Santa
Number two, you're tucked away in bed. It's Christmas Eve. It's nighttime, about 11:30, close to midnight. You hear a pitter patter on the roof. You're like, what? What could that be? All of a sudden, you kind of sneak out of your 1. Out of your bedroom. You're walking down the hall. You hear somebody inside next to the Christmas tree. You hear some toys rattling. You hear something. You're like, could that be. There's no way. You kind of like, look over the corner of the wall, right. The hallway. You kind of look over and you see the outline of jolly old Saint Nick. And you're like, oh, my God, I can't believe he's real. You kind of take a step over to see, is that really him? And then he tells you, there's one for you right there, kid. Turn around all of a sudden, a little tiny box right where you were. How did he know you were there? How did he know to put the box there? All of a sudden, you open up the box. What is it? It's a 40 burger. You look at it, you're like, a 40 burger. All of a sudden, Santa turns around. Guess who Santa is. Baker Mayfield.
Jessica
Oh, wow.
Cuban Santa
He tells you. Yeah, here come the Bucks.
Mike Ryan
It was a long way to go.
Billy
For a 40 bird.
Jessica
It was a wordy number two, tone. It was.
Billy
I mean, Pat McAfee says the bucks can beat anybody.
Jessica
They can.
Billy
They can beat anybody.
Jessica
Check out that schedule. I mean, the Bucks are going. They're gonna go into the playoffs on like an eight game winning streak. They are.
Billy
They.
Cuban Santa
I mean, and they beating the Lions at full strength.
Billy
They beat the Lions and beat the Eagles.
Jessica
Yep. Good team, number one, Tom.
Cuban Santa
He said they're on their way. Number one. We were talking a couple weeks ago about who's who. Right? Where the packers are, who when they lost the Lions, who's who. Well, I'm here to tell you the Whoville population is six. There are six people. Six teams in Whoville. Okay, my bad. My beard's getting onto the microphone.
Jessica
It's okay.
Cuban Santa
There's six. Six teams in Whoville right now. The Buffalo Bills, residents of Whoville. The Philadelphia Eagles, residents of Whoville. The Detroit Lions, still residents of Whoville. Kansas City Chiefs, residents of Whoville. Baltimore Ravens, resident of who's ville. And just sneaking in right into the gun.
Jessica
Whoville.
Cuban Santa
Dan. Oh, Dan, you're there.
Stugotz
Yeah, well, Tony, see, here's the thing. Tony, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. This has never happened before in the history of the show. Not in 20 years.
Jessica
Whoville.
Stugotz
I have never before seen a segment stolen so effortlessly from someone as Rose just stole this segment from you. Rose, just what was happening behind you is the funniest thing this show has ever done.
Billy
Damn. We dug ourselves out of that awkwardness. And we're giving Tony a shine. Not to throw it back in his face.
Jessica
You just told a story about Baker Mayfield.
Billy
Yeah. Do the whole story again.
Jessica
Do it again.
Mike Ryan
Do it again.
Jessica
Number two, Tony.
Billy
I think there were three. All of a sudden, there's a pitter.
Mike Ryan
Patter on the roof.
Stugotz
We went from Lucy's roaring with laughter to Tony solo drum act of There's a pitter patter on the wall. And the big joke end is BAKER Mayfield had a 40 burger.
Jessica
You didn't hear it correctly. Tony number two.
Billy
And later, we're going full circle.
Jessica
Yeah.
Mike Ryan
Full circle.
Stugotz
Well, that was a joke.
Cuban Santa
Full circle.
Jessica
Yeah, we'll get.
Billy
Did I not say it? I think I get it. Because he got, you know, he didn't get to win the Super Bowl. The Coles did. Now it's his turn.
Cuban Santa
Full circle.
Billy
I think. I think I just ruined it.
Jessica
We'll play the game later, though.
Mike Ryan
Jeez.
Billy
Howdy, it's Mike. Want to talk to you about Game Time. For my money, the very best secondary ticket marketplace app there is on the market. And trust me, I've been around the block a few times when it comes to this and I always come back to Game Time. Plenty of reasons why. Let me detail them for you all in pricing, panoramic seat views, the lowest price guarantee. GameTime will credit you 110% of the difference if you dare find a better deal out there. And their unparalleled gametime ticket coverage has your purchase covered with the most flexible customer service policy in the ticketing industry. And also they have this brand new wonderful feature called gametime Picks that makes getting tickets to see your favorite teams play live even easier. Gametime Picks filters out the fluff to show you only incredible deals on great seats so you don't have to waste time searching through thousands of tickets with gametime Picks. It helps to make curation easier to save more on sports, concerts, comedy, theater and more. Take the guesswork out of buying tickets with GameTime Picks. Download the GameTime app, create an account and use code DAN for $20 off your first purchase Terms apply again. Create an account and redeem code Dan for $20 off. Download GameTime today. What time is it? Game Time.
Jessica
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Tony
This episode is brought to you by Disney Game On Because ESPN content is available on Disney, you can watch your favorites from Disney, Hulu and ESPN together like never before. Before with espn, unwrap a full day of NBA action On Christmas Day, tip off the festivities with the spurs and Knicks, followed by the Mavs and Timberwolves. Then a clash between the Lakers and Warriors, followed by the 76ers and Celtics. And finally the Nuggets face off against the Suns. All streaming December 25th. Then with Hulu, watch the terrifying sci fi thriller Romulus, where a group of young space colonizers come face to face with the ultimate horror. And on Disney, follow the adventures of four kids across the galaxy as they meet unlikely allies and enemies in Star Skeleton Crew, starring Jude Law. All of these and more now streaming and available with a Bundle subscription. Visit disneyplus.com for details.
Billy
Terms apply Don LeBatard to US residents oh wow.
Jessica
It's in there. Better.
Billy
You think I haven't been practicing stugats?
Stugotz
I didn't realize we had a substitute. Too complicated Legacy brought by headquarter Toyota.
Cuban Santa
441 Powerline Road second down to nine. This is the D?
Mike Ryan
Ler show with the ST. It was hard to follow number two.
Cuban Santa
Tony. No, I'm not doing that. Last resident of Whoville.
Jessica
Oh, Whoville.
Cuban Santa
Not doing it. Yeah. Last resident of Whoville. The Packers.
Stugotz
Wow.
Cuban Santa
Whoville. Population of 6.
Billy
Whoville.
Cuban Santa
The packers just. Just snuck under the gun.
Billy
They have that look, Tony. They have that look.
Cuban Santa
Packers are good. I've got a little future on him on DraftKings Sportsbook packers to win the whole thing. Just a little sprinkling that I had in August, baby. Got a good little price on it. So again, your Google population. Bills, Eagles, Lions, Chiefs, Packers, Ravens.
Stugotz
Wait, wait. This is if in a look. Look, I need to aggressively make DraftKings understand in a contract here that if the Holidays are not filled with Cuban Santa is telling you what to bet on this game from a parking lot outside of a bar. If the, if Feldman and the others don't turn this into Tony making some Money the next 10 days as Cuban Santa gives you gambling advice, we will have failed as a company. We will have failed as a partnership. Tony, make it happen. I want you make it. I want it raining money on Cuban Santa.
Billy
We're selling Rose now. Sorry, we've moved on cash and toys.
Stugotz
What do you want to tell people about what they can do here for the next couple of hours, Tony, before we go back out to Rose later to see if she could can pronounce Luigi Mangione?
Cuban Santa
Absolutely, Dan. 2721 Bird Avenue. We're here at the Flanagans in Coconut Grove. We're accepting all toys. Yes, we're accepting all toys. Unwrapped gift cards for kids that are a little bit older. Bring those. We'll put them right here in this box. And you're supporting an amazing cause with the Branches charity.
Stugotz
Thank you, Tony. It is branches. It is branchesfl.org if you want to just in a real easy way. I know, I know many of you may not be able to get over to the places we're talking about. Our show is now, you know, on all over the place. So you. But if you want to help with what it is that we're doing, you can participate with branchesfield.org if you're local. You can drop off things, unwrap toys at corner Coffee here at the Elser, 398 Northeast 5th Street. Monday through Friday, 7am to 2pm the next couple of days we're going to be out at Vivo where we were for the watch party.
Billy
And that's very convenient because you can just pull up to that, to that location and it's in a mall. So if you don't have a toy with you, walk in the mall, grab a toy and bring it to Vivo.
Stugotz
And so we're gonna make this real easy over the next few days. We're trying to do this in an old style radio remote thing over the next three days where we gather somewhere. And if fans of this show, you have a couple of days to gather or want to just bring us stuff physically, we would love to relay your happiness to kids during what can be a tough time.
Jessica
Tony mentioned two teams there, the Lions and the Bucs. First with the Lions. Dan Campbell said after the game that loss is exactly what we needed.
Stugotz
Okay.
Jessica
I told you, Dan. I mean, Dan Campbel Campbell loves A good loss.
Mike Ryan
We told you this last week that this is a must lose for both teams and that one of them was going to get adversity of this. And Dan Campbell today on 97.1, the ticket said, quote, this is exactly what we needed. Sometimes you got to get punched in the mouth and remember what it used to be like to really appreciate where you are. And we'll do that.
Stugotz
Okay? So one thing I wanted to do, Stugance, because of what Billy is doing there and what you guys are doing in general, we have gotten to the point of the season where you really like making the confident statements of knowing something. When you say 15 weeks in, hey, you know what? I know the Bucks can beat anybody and the packers can beat anybody.
Jessica
Yeah.
Stugotz
That's what I got for you. They can beat anybody. And those are two new teams to the. They should beat anybody group.
Billy
The Rams, too.
Jessica
Yeah, the Rams.
Billy
That. That packers who's who performance actually paved the way for the Rams to host a playoff game and beat anybody.
Jessica
I actually have my top five teams you don't want to see come playoff time.
Mike Ryan
In fairness to Dan, Tony knew that in August. He just didn't tell us.
Jessica
That's right.
Stugotz
All right. Tony struggled through that segment. And Lucy, holy. I mean, what Rose does to make you laugh. I can't believe that. That the outtakes aren't filled with things that Rose has done to make you laugh.
Jessica
It like, Jeremy, that was.
Dan LeBatard
She's filming. She's holding the camera, so she's.
Stugotz
I know, but that was unbelievable what was happening behind Tony that entire seg. I could not have. I could not have gotten paid actors to make that look like that.
Dan LeBatard
She is so unintentionally funny. We were at the. When we were at the Big Ten championship game. We're watching the game. I look over at Rosa just watching Netflix during the game on her computer. One time, Harry and I asked her what her favorite American comedy movie was, and she said, Miss Congeniality 2. The second one, she is. What's in 2? What's 2? I don't know. You gotta ask Rose. She loves it.
Billy
Yeah. She's like, you're not gonna believe this. We're going back to you. You're going back to another pageant.
Dan LeBatard
What?
Billy
She's like, what?
Dan LeBatard
They ran it back.
Billy
I did this once before.
Stugotz
Oh, well, I o.
Jessica
Well, I. I have a top five.
Stugotz
Okay.
Jessica
All right.
Stugotz
That's how you do it. Jeremy Teach the man.
Jessica
I had to do it like that.
Stugotz
I mean. Yes. Let's see. I think it'll Fall apart. I think that that's as. As well as you can do. Number five.
Jessica
Number five. The Den.
Stugotz
Yes. So let's see.
Mike Ryan
What's the list?
Jessica
Top five teams you don't want to see come playoff time.
Stugotz
Okay. Number four. It's Stugot, storming his way into the segment with a Christmas song to knock Jeremy and Tony out of the way on. This is how you do it, kids. Number four.
Jessica
The Rams. They do not want to see that team come Christmas time.
Billy
Just one syllable, I guess. It's tough.
Jessica
I think. Number three. Number three.
Stugotz
I think it's gonna fall apart.
Jessica
The Green Bay Packers.
Stugotz
Not bad. Not bad.
Billy
Number four was my favorite.
Stugotz
Just Rams, Rams, sports talk.
Jessica
Number two. Number two, the Minnesota Vikings. No one thinks they're any good. I mean, why number one? Number one, The Tampa Bay Buccaneers.
Stugotz
Yes. All right, so it's a different version. The same game said a different way. Dan.
Jessica
They've won four straight. They're going to win their next three. If you look at the schedule, it's Dallas, it's Carolina and the Saints. You do not want Baker Mayfield in the first round. Baker. Because some teams like to ease into the playoffs. Baker doesn't ease into anything.
Stugotz
Okay, I would. I would like very much.
Dan LeBatard
I have an important announcement to make. Rose just texted me and said Ms. Congeniality 2 is not about going back. It's about Sandra Bullock's character saving her friend who was kidnapped by accident.
Tony
What?
Mike Ryan
She got me the rare.
Billy
I haven't seen Miss Congeniality, too. I'm sorry.
Stugotz
So Rose has you. You. You got it all wrong. You. You were talking a language here. Mike Ryan came in trying to support with. With faux fake. You didn't have it right on Ms. Congeniality 2.
Billy
I took a guess that they. That they decided to repeat the formula, the wildly successful Miss Congeniality one. And I missed the mark, and I apologize.
Stugotz
Well, I think this is why Lucy was saying the randomness of that being your favorite comedy of all time. Like that Jessica's response.
Dan LeBatard
Comedy. She gets really mad when you say it's her favorite comedy of all time.
Stugotz
Okay, but I saw you two.
Billy
You sure there isn't a beauty pageant? Because Sister Act 2, back in the habit was kind of like different, but also similar in that she was still a nun.
Stugotz
I didn't understand why it is that you were showing movies to Rose yesterday and you were trying to get her to explain things. I was watching you and Rose, and I'm saying if someone were filming this, this would be a hysterical language. Barrier moment where Lucy and Rose are trying to enjoy laughter at the same time, but they're not enjoying things at the same time. But Lucy is finding Rose being frustrated by trying to explain why this is funny. Funny.
Dan LeBatard
Well, so she showed us a clip which was just Sandra Bullock chasing down Dolly Parton. And she was like, this is the funniest thing I've ever seen. And I was like, rose, this isn't that funny. And then she said, okay, I have a great idea. I'll show you and Jeremy this really funny Spanish TV show, but it doesn't have English subtitles and Jeremy and I don't speak Spanish. She said, don't worry, I'll translate it for you. So she showed us the. The trailer. She translated the first five seconds and then just couldn't stop laughing throughout the rest of the trailer. So Jeremy, we're like, hey, we don't. We have no idea what is happening here or what's going on. But she was like, you. You have to be able to tell it's funny. And that's pretty much all my conversations with Rose.
Stugotz
You guys have traversed the language. She's fighting through it all with an accent and she is uproariously funny. And now she has replaced Chris Cody in most capable of producing a surprise. This is now two times we've gone to her where she is trying to help out and everything is funnier than what came before it. She's a natural born star and she's a singer and she's collecting toys with Cuban Santa. Tony, who better have a gambling sponsorship by the end of this segment or I walk. DraftKings hold on a second.
Mike Ryan
What?
Jessica
What happened?
Mike Ryan
Let's not hitch our wagon to Tony.
Billy
Yeah, we're not doing that.
Stugotz
I think we need to strap ourselves.
Mike Ryan
That's how we ended up out of espn.
Stugotz
Cuban Santa. I think we need. I think we need to ride Cuban Santa's top five into the sky.
Mike Ryan
Let's take a vote.
Dan LeBatard
Cuban Santa was going to be wearing shorts and we'd see some balls.
Jessica
I was hoping.
Stugotz
Really?
Mike Ryan
That's a callback.
Stugotz
Yes, it is. Well, you can explain that it's a callback.
Dan LeBatard
I don't want people to think I'm.
Jessica
Talking about my jingle balls. Jingle balls. Jingle all the way.
Stugotz
I understand that's a bad spot for you, Jess. That's a bad spot.
Dan LeBatard
That's fine. I did it to myself also, Mike, I'm sorry, I. You made a comment about Miss Congeniality too, so I thought you'd seen it. So then I put you on the spot. And then.
Stugotz
And he faked it.
Billy
I was just saying I'm gonna look. I'm like a dog with a bone on this one. There's gotta be some sort of beauty contest.
Jessica
There is.
Mike Ryan
It's. It's called Miss Congeniality. Two Colon. Armed and fabulous. Gracie Hunt was never thrilled to have to go undercover as a competitor in a beauty pageant. Now Gracie, who works for the FBI, is dealing with some very public attention, thanks to her waltz down the Runway. Her overnight celebrity does not impress her new partner, Regina King. But the pair has to put aside their differences when one of Gracie's former beauty queen pals, Heather Burns, turns up missing and the FBI is put on the case.
Dan LeBatard
Yeah, so Rose text me back and said there is not a beauty pageant. Because Sandra Bullock became the face of the FBI, so she couldn't go back as a secret agent because she's too famous now.
Billy
There has to be a pageant.
Mike Ryan
There is a pageant. She's in a pageant dress.
Billy
Yeah, there has to be a pageant. Maybe she's one of the judges at the pageant. Take my word for it. I've seen it several times.
Stugotz
Is one of the possibilities, Mike, in any of the hypotheticals we're exploring, that you might be wrong?
Billy
No, not at all. No. I'm telling you, there's a pageant in this goddamn movie.
Mike Ryan
It's my favorite American comedy.
Billy
There has to be a pageant. She's in it. She's got the whole pageant sash.
Stugotz
But you refuse to acknowledge that. One of the possibilities.
Billy
I did initially, but now I'm a man and I'm doubling down. And I'm telling you, there is 100% a goddamn pageant in this movie.
Stugotz
Okay, you know what? You've gone now aggressive to lacking confidence. You were cornered by everybody on what your facts were, and you've come out aggressively loud, wrong, and no one trust information anymore. You've damaged your credibility with. We all saw it. You were kind of faking your way through that. We all saw it. And we didn't support you on it. We all saw it. We didn't live the lie with you.
Dan LeBatard
Rose has texted me that we can do a movie watch day at the office because Mike needs to watch it. I'll be out next week.
Mike Ryan
Yeah, let's do that next week.
Billy
Yeah, do it on the 25th. I'm free on the 25th.
Dan LeBatard
I'm not chief Steelers. It's gonna ruin my Christmas. I've basically seen it with how many clips Rose has played me. I don't know the plot or anything.
Billy
So everyone's in the car singing one song and she's just doing Florence at the top of her lungs. That's insane behavior.
Dan LeBatard
No dry stamp a wall. It's either Florence or it's Wicked.
Mike Ryan
Is she wearing headphones?
Dan LeBatard
And wicked is even worse. Sometimes she has headphones for Wicked. She is just always singing Wicked.
Stugotz
Okay, if I may, please. Cause there were two places I really wanted to get here. Okay. But I've been trying to get here for about 10 days. I really just wanted to talk about the Bears for a minute because I know Jessica so mad at the. She's so mad at the Bears. And I really do want to talk as we talk about all the football tough guys. I mean, the Panthers going in last night to Edmonton with a reminder like, no, but I mean that's a national echo. Or where you're like, look, I know we're all going to check back in in the postseason and it's going to get ratcheted to another place. Place. But reminding Edmonton on the road, okay, yeah, you can go five goals, but we got six for you, including one from behind the net. Like it. It was startling to me to watch the juxtaposition of. Oh shit, the Heat just lost to the Pistons. And I don't care. I'm over here. I'm over here because they got my attention last postseason. And I'm watching like, I'm watching what feels like playoff hockey because the Panthers want to remind Edmond and oh, if we see you again, if we see you again, you don't get the sport from us. Just with a good regular season.
Jessica
Right? It was, it was so impressive from this standpoint. They won the cup last year, Edmonton, trying to prove something. I believe the Panthers were down 4, 2 in that game and they came back to win at 6, 5. That's such an impressive win. And they did it in Edmonton.
Mike Ryan
And Reinhardt with one of the best plays, like stealing the puck on one end, taking it the length of the ice and then putting it. Did it hit off the Skinner's back?
Billy
Yeah, he hit it off of. Off of Skinner. This is a complete play. Reinhardt's a great two way player, doesn't get the attention because he's on the team with Barkov, who was out, by the way. And this was such a huge win because the Oilers came in red hot five in a row, scoring over five goals a game in that five. And they flatly don't lose when they score over five goals. Panthers haven't been shut out again. The usual part in the calendar where they dip. They go down two goals, and you think it's over. And then they have this incredible performance. And that is how you fake something without having watched it.
Stugotz
That's amazing.
Billy
I definitely didn't give up on that game after they went down two goals. Definitely didn't.
Jessica
But the reason I score will help.
Stugotz
The reason I want to get back to the Bears. But before I do this, because I haven't been able to do this for 10 days, and we've got a room stugance that wants to talk about something. Everybody wants to talk about it. And it is not a conversation that it includes us. And everyone wants to talk about Wicked. And I have failed at any point to talk about Wicked. And mystery crate's gonna get it. Or there is some valuable Wicked content around how much the people in that shipping container care about. Jeremy's not here. It's gonna exasperate him that this is the day that he is not here. Because everybody has wanted to talk about this for about 10 days.
Mike Ryan
I actually saw it as a wicked virgin. I had never seen the play at all, and I was into it.
Dan LeBatard
That's what people in Boston call virgins.
Mike Ryan
Y.
Jessica
Wicked.
Mike Ryan
But I have one critique. I have one critique. Jeff Goldblum. You're just Jeff Goldblum. Okay.
Dan LeBatard
Whoa, whoa.
Mike Ryan
Like, he's the.
Dan LeBatard
What do you mean by that?
Mike Ryan
He's playing the wizard of Oz, and it's like, I just see Jeff Goldblum. Like, I thought that was a bad casting. I just. I just. Anytime he's in a role, I just am looking at Jeff Goldblum. There are plenty of actors like this that they're just.
Stugotz
My wife loves him. She's. He's one of her favorites.
Billy
Yeah, he's a zad. I'm totally good with the wizard should be a Jeff Goldblum type. So Jeff Goldblum playing himself. I didn't have an issue with it, but I get what you're saying. But I also was a wicked virgin going into it. I love the wizard of Oz, but I'd never seen the musical, and I came away blown away by it. And that's exactly what movies should be. It felt like a throwback, not just because it was a musical, but you had these practical sets being built, and it took you to another world without this weird greenish hue of special effects clouding everything. It didn't feel like a Marvel movie. It felt like these were things that were rooted and in real, tangible things, and I loved it.
Mike Ryan
Any other wicked virgins around here? That was terrible.
Dan LeBatard
I haven't seen the movie yet, but I did see it on Broadway, and I think that it's absolutely absurd that we're doing this when Jeremy's not here. When he dressed up as Elphaba last week, like, this is just, like, I understand. Like, he's the annoying guy and his character is annoying, and we all are annoyed by him. But this is just mean now. It's just mean.
Stugotz
I didn't do it on purpose. No, Jessica. Wait a minute. I understand. Wait a minute.
Mike Ryan
Played 17 of his songs today.
Stugotz
Wait a minute. I. I understand that you. This is the first day in any of the days that everyone has wanted to talk about Vic Wicked, where I have three of the four people in who want to talk about Wicked on the same day. I, I. Your enthusiasm here. We can't produce anything other than that Stu got Wicked, bad joke, and Chris Cody's bad impersonation there. It seems like the other people in that room know their Wicked more than Chris Cody, who's a virgin and is already here to tell us that Jeff Goldblum is overrated as an actor.
Mike Ryan
Not as an actor, just in that role.
Stugotz
Very confident to do that.
Jessica
Why are you assigning the bad joke to me? It was Jess. I mean, I thought it was a funny joke.
Stugotz
Yeah, Wicked, Virginia.
Billy
No, but you called it vicked.
Stugotz
Yes, I did do that.
Billy
What they do in Eastern Europe.
Stugotz
Well, Jeremy's got a Michael Vick song over there. Yes, Michael song for everything, I guess. You can't put my Vic in a box.
Mike Ryan
All right, we're reaching now.
Jessica
That's.
Mike Ryan
This is not a Christmas.
Billy
Did he just send that in?
Stugotz
Yes. Right.
Dan LeBatard
I think it's because of the head coaching rumors.
Stugotz
Put my Vic in a box.
Dan LeBatard
But he is. It is a stretch.
Mike Ryan
I mean, maybe he's trying to project what we're gonna talk about.
Billy
He is working really hard.
Mike Ryan
Is he trying to get a record deal? Like, what are we doing? Because, like, these used to be, like, funny. Like, oh, this person's so. It used to be Taylor. Like, no one could sing. This is a fun. Like, you're bad at singing. Trying to get a record deal. What's happening?
Dan LeBatard
We could admit the 201 yesterday was funny.
Stugotz
Can we?
Billy
I didn't hear it. Can I hear it?
Mike Ryan
I don't even remember that one.
Stugotz
I think Rose needs. I think Jeremy wants what Rose now has, which is just a natural, organic way of singing in a way that delights us instead of annoys us.
Jessica
You better watch out. You better just slide. You better not tackle. I think you might die. 2.
Stugotz
Will you please get down?
Jessica
2. Will you please get down, 2, will you please just get down?
Mike Ryan
All right, that's enough of that.
Jessica
Eight more minutes.
Stugotz
But it is how I spent the game watching. It is. It's some form of Christmas.
Jessica
Jesus Christ.
Stugotz
Will you please get down? It is. I want you guys to imagine me. Okay, look, now that it's been unmasked, now that I'm clearly a homer, who just votes for Cam Ward? I will be honest with you about how I watch the Dolphin game on Sunday. It's. This is an honest. This is. It's like this we've ever seen to a kid for six and eight. Like, okay, so you can be in the mix with the Colts.
Cuban Santa
Can tell it's your brain.
Stugotz
Not head first.
Jessica
Watch out. You better.
Stugotz
It's Christmas.
Jessica
Christmas in the hospital is shitty.
Stugotz
Will you please get down? Get down.
Jessica
I'm worried about your brain, Travis. Homer's a bear.
Billy
Well, you can have a long career if you're good at special teams.
Mike Ryan
Good news for Estrepo.
Billy
Howdy, it's Mike. Want to talk to you about Game Time. For my money, the very best secondary ticket marketplace app there is on the market. And trust me, I've been around the block a few times when it comes to this, and I always come back to Game Time. Plenty of reasons why. Let me detail them for you all in pricing. Panoramic seat views, the lowest price guarantee. GameTime will credit you 110% of the difference if you dare find a better deal out there. And their unparalleled gametime ticket coverage has your purchase covered with the most flexible customer service policy in the ticketing industry. And also they have this brand new wonderful feature called gametime Picks that makes getting tickets to see your favorite teams play live even easier. Gametime Picks filters out the flow to show you only incredible deals on great seats so you don't have to waste time searching through thousands of tickets with gametime Picks. It helps to make curation easier to save more on sports, concerts, comedy, theater and more. Take the guesswork out of buying tickets with GameTime Picks. Download the GameTime app, create an account and use code DAN for $20 off your first purchase terms. Apply again. Create an account and redeem code Dan for $20 off. Download GameTime today. What time is it? Game Time.
Jessica
How do you feel when you switch to GEICO and save on your car insurance? It's like going to work on Thursday morning and thinking to yourself, just one more day until Friday. But then somebody walks into the elevator.
Mike Ryan
And says Happy Friday.
Jessica
Then you check your phone quickly and discover today is actually Friday. So yes, Happy Friday, random stranger in the elevator. Happy Fri. Yay. Indeed. Yep. Switching and saving with Geico feels just like that. Get more with Geico.
The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz: Episode Summary
Episode Title: The Big Suey: Top 5 NFL Teams You Don't Want To See Come Playoff Time
Release Date: December 17, 2024
The episode kicks off with the hosts, Dan Le Batard and Stugotz, promoting a charitable toy drive hosted at Flanagan's in Coconut Grove. This segment emphasizes community involvement and the importance of supporting local causes during the holiday season.
Notable Quote:
The hosts transition into a live segment, engaging with "Cuban Santa" to encourage listeners to donate toys and gifts. This interactive portion showcases the show's commitment to charitable efforts while blending humor and spontaneity.
Notable Quotes:
The core of the episode revolves around "The Big Suey" segment, where the hosts list and discuss the top five NFL teams they believe are unfavorable to encounter during the playoff season. This analysis blends sports insight with the show's characteristic humor and banter.
Top 5 Teams:
Notable Quotes:
A recurring theme throughout the episode involves Rose, a key contributor to the show, who adds a layer of comedy through her struggles with pronunciation and engagement during discussions. Her interactions often lead to humorous exchanges and light-hearted moments among the hosts.
Notable Quotes:
The hosts delve into conversations about popular culture, specifically discussing the movie "Miss Congeniality 2" and the musical "Wicked." These segments reveal the hosts' varying tastes and spark debates, particularly revolving around Rose's opinions and the accuracy of their recollections.
Notable Quotes:
Beyond NFL discussions, the episode features an in-depth analysis of an NHL game where the Florida Panthers secured a significant victory against the Edmonton Oilers. The hosts commend the Panthers' resilience and strategic gameplay, highlighting key players and pivotal moments that contributed to the win.
Notable Quotes:
As the episode draws to a close, the hosts reflect on the day's discussions, reiterating the importance of community involvement through the toy drive and summarizing their top NFL team rankings. They also tease future segments, including potential movie watch days and continued sports analysis.
Notable Quotes:
Community Engagement: The show emphasizes the significance of giving back, successfully intertwining charitable initiatives with entertainment.
Sports Expertise: Through "The Big Suey," the hosts provide insightful yet humorous analyses of NFL teams, offering listeners both information and amusement.
Dynamic Host Interactions: The chemistry among the hosts, especially with Rose's comedic contributions, adds a unique and engaging layer to the show.
Cultural Commentary: Discussions on movies and musicals reflect the hosts' diverse interests and foster relatable conversations for the audience.
Overall, this episode balances sports discourse with lighthearted interactions and meaningful community engagement, embodying the show's essence of blending "sports, pop-culture and more" from the vibrant backdrop of Downtown Miami.