Zaslow Almost Got Into a Fight At a Dave Matthews Concert?! | Local Hour

Summary

Episode Summary: "Zaslow Almost Got Into a Fight At a Dave Matthews Concert?! | Local Hour"

The Dan Le Batard Show with Stugotz | May 22, 2026

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Episode Overview

Broadcasting from the Elser Hotel in Downtown Miami, the Dan Le Batard crew delivers another lively "Local Hour" packed with offbeat banter about music tastes, South Florida culture, and key NBA storylines. This episode’s signature story is Zaslow’s near-altercation at a Dave Matthews Band concert—a springboard for debates on musical “chicken tenders,” concert anthropology, and classic sports talk. Regulars Dan, Stugotz, Mike Ryan, and Dave Dameshek are joined by friends of the show for a mix of nostalgia, irreverence, and takes on the current NBA trade rumors.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Friday Energy, Crew Chemistry, and Musical "Chicken Tenders"

• The team kicks off with celebratory Friday vibes and makes fun of their own musical tastes.
• Zaslow’s music palette is compared to "ordering chicken tenders at a fancy restaurant"—liking only the most popular, accessible bands of the 90s (Seattle grunge, especially) ([01:38]).
  • Memorable quote:
    Mike Ryan: "Your rock music palette is basically ordering the chicken tenders. Like, you don't know any bands from the Greater Manchester area." ([01:41])
• Lighthearted gatekeeping about Radiohead, Dave Matthews Band, and what constitutes mainstream vs. “steak”/“sushi” music.
• Ongoing jokes about Radiohead and Pearl Jam as “chicken tenders”—comfort food for rock fans.

2. Dave Matthews Band, Personal Anecdotes, and the Infamous Concert Showdown

• Zaslow sheepishly admits to liking the Dave Matthews Band due to his wife being a longtime fan, despite the panel's mockery.
  • “We used to go see Dave Matthews Band every summer… I could take it or leave it. I’ve seen them enough. Like, I don’t need to see them again.” — Zaslow ([05:48])
• Descriptions of the typical DMB concert crowd in South Florida: cargo shorts, flip-flops, hacky sacks, and reserved lawn areas.
• Main story: Zaslow almost gets into a fight in the Dave Matthews Band pit ([07:31]):
  • Annoyed by a drunk college kid repeatedly bumping into his wife, Zaslow is forced to “gently shove him off”—eventually summoning backup from his ex-pro-athlete friend.
  • Funny moment:
    Zaslow: “That’s why I like going to Dave Matthews Band, because they all make me look tough.” ([10:37])
• The team cracks up debating whether a pit at a DMB show could really get "rough," and why Stugotz needs former athletes as friends for concert security.

3. Confrontation Stories and Fake Cop Drama

• Dameshek shares his own recent road rage confrontation, complete with a "fake badge" moment in LA traffic ([16:17]):
  • A man flashes a fake badge after Dameshek honks, only to realize a real cop is nearby.
  • The group laughs about whether Dameshek should report him, and how his child in the car reacted to the chase.

4. NBA Rumor Mill: Giannis & the "Disgruntled Star Sweepstakes"

• Discussion shifts (naturally) to trade rumors:
  • The Miami Heat are rumored to be the favorites to land Giannis Antetokounmpo.
  • Conversation branches out to what it would take to get Giannis, and whether pairing him with other superstars (Kyrie Irving? Ja Morant?) is realistic ([20:24]).
  • Stat context:
    Salary numbers and injury history for Kyrie, Ja, and other “risk/reward” stars are cited. “You have the off chance that if they’re all healthy… you have the interior defense and honestly perimeter defense of Bam [Adebayo]…” — Mike Ryan ([20:40])
• Debate about how "lukewarm" the markets are on top players and whether the Heat could capitalize (“quintessential Heat move…pounce on a disgruntled player…” — Zaslow [24:14]).

5. Sports Fan Anthropology: The Hierarchy of Seats

• Tangent into sports culture:
  • Value and social currency of "celebrity row" at Knicks games ([31:56]); Ben Stiller recording cell phone videos courtside leads to questions: “For whom?” are the videos taken, and do celebs ever rewatch them?
  • Debate on best seats for different sports (football: 50-yard line and up high; hockey: behind the net for “shoot-twice side”; basketball/baseball: down low).
    • Dameshek: “For football, where should it be? The end?...Of course it should be the 50 yard line.” ([36:50])
  • Nostalgia about old-school ticket buying (“best available” at the box office) and how young fans will never understand the uncertainty of not choosing your exact seats ([38:46]).

6. NBA Playoffs & Celebrity Sightings

• Knicks pull away for a 2–0 series lead over Cleveland; the gang reacts to sports media’s habit of declaring series "over" after two games, with historical reminders that upsets can happen ([27:20]).
  • Zaslow: “You can’t say that the series is over before Cleveland’s even played a home game…That’s going to make me nuts all day today.”
• Light ribbing of James Harden’s performance ("He had a nothing game last night" — Zaslow [30:54]) and the sometimes misleading nature of “counting stats."

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [01:41] Mike Ryan: “Your rock music palette is basically ordering the chicken tenders.”
• [05:48] Zaslow: “We used to go see Dave Matthews Band every summer… I could take it or leave it. I’ve seen them enough. Like, I don’t need to see them again.”
• [10:37] Zaslow: "That's why I like going to Dave Matthews Band, because they all make me look tough...I did tap my big friend—just so he could be aware. Now I got a little more courage."
• [16:17] Dameshek: “I’m pulling onto the one-on-one freeway… he holds up a badge and says, ‘Stop tailgating me, MFer.' And then realizes… oh, there’s a real cop right across the street.”
• [24:14] Zaslow (on Heat moves): “That's your quintessential Heat move, where you try and pounce on a disgruntled player…when the atmosphere around the league is lukewarm on him.”
• [31:56] Dameshek: “The world has become more and more, if you aren’t aware, about the haves and have nots…Ben Stiller happens to be one of those people. And we’re all supposed to swoon because he has an HD image of James Harden in close up at MSG.”
• [36:50] Dameshek: “Of course the only place to sit for football is the 50 yard line. If you have a choice, right place.”
• [38:46] Zaslow: “You didn’t get to pull up Ticketmaster and look at the blue dots…you’d say to the box office, ‘Give me two of your best available.'”
• [30:54] Zaslow (on Harden): "He had a nothing game last night, though.”

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Debate on musical “chicken tenders,” Radiohead & DMB: [00:41] – [05:48]
• Zaslow’s Dave Matthews fight story: [07:31] – [12:02]
• Fake badge / LA road-rage story (Dameshek): [16:17] – [18:51]
• NBA trade rumors: Giannis, Kyrie, Ja Morant: [20:24] – [26:18]
• Debate on series being "over" (Knicks-Cavs): [27:20] – [28:47]
• Celebrity row, seat selection, sports fan anthropology: [31:56] – [39:08]

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Tone and Style Notes

The usual Dan Le Batard zaniness runs throughout—irreverent, self-deprecating, with everyone quick to turn stories into punchlines. The episode blends genuine South Florida sports insight with hyperlocal color and nostalgia, mocking each other’s tastes and memories in equal measure. The banter is quick, conversational, and full of callbacks, making it both accessible and loaded with inside jokes for longtime listeners.

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In Closing

This episode is emblematic of the “Local Hour” at its best: sports talk woven with cultural sidebars, sharp inside jokes, and enough random anecdotes (pit fights, road rage, seat snobbery) to delight both Miami diehards and national fans. At its heart: Zaslow’s Dave Matthews concert tale—a perfect mix of Florida Man energy and dad-anxiety, set to the most chicken-tender soundtrack of them all.

Transcript

[A]

This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugach podcast.

[B]

Yo. Let's give it up, everybody, for Friday. It's here. Friday it's here. We did it, everybody.

[A]

Let's go.

[B]

We made it to the weekend. That's right. Hello to Friday. Hello to everybody on the other side over there in the shipping container. I don't know if this crew's work together yet. Dave, good morning to you out there on the West Coast. Hello, Dave. Damaschek, Zaz Company.

[C]

What's the poop? These are sunny times. Aaron Rodgers is back, as well as basketball.

[B]

Oh, I could tell you're very excited about Aaron Rodgers being back.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Before Memorial Day, what was everybody so worried about?

[B]

Why am I being peppered with questions about my musical taste before I walk into the studio here this morning? Mike Ryan. Okay, first, I am asked, do I like Radiohead? And. And of course I like Radiohead. All right. I've seen Radiohead several times in concert.

[A]

This is the first European band that I know you to like.

[B]

All right. I've seen them several times in concert. I used to be a huge radio. Matter of fact, I left this country one time to go see Radiohead in another country. That's a little bit redundant when I say left this country to go see in another country. But nonetheless, I said what? I said, I've seen Radiohead several times. And then I feel like I was being judged not based on my answer, but when you are then putting me on the spot and asking me, do I like Dave Matthews Band?

[A]

Yeah. Because you look like you like Dave Matthews Band.

[B]

Okay, but, like, that's an indictment. But why are you asking me today do I like Dave Matthews?

[A]

You know. You know Ethan, right? Ethan Badowski?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

When you take him to a restaurant, doesn't matter how fancy it is, he's going to order chicken tenders. And I think your rock music palette is basically ordering the chicken tenders. Like, you don't know any bands from the.

[C]

Man.

[A]

The Greater Manchester area.

[B]

I like what I like.

[A]

Yes. Which is Chicken Tenders. So I was just curious because Dave had an interesting radio head.

[B]

Are you telling me Seattle in the 90s is chicken tenders?

[A]

It is. Yeah.

[B]

Come on.

[A]

To, like, Pearl Jam is Chicken Tenders.

[B]

Okay, but it's Pearl Jam and it's Alice in Chains and it's Soundgarden.

[A]

Yeah. It was the most popular version of rock at that time. It was Chicken Tenders.

[B]

All right.

[A]

But they're great.

[C]

Shout out to Nirvana, though.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I love Chicken Tenders. Too. But if I'm in a, you know, sometimes I'm mood for a nice steak or some sush.

[B]

I like Nirvana obviously, but I. But unless Nirvana is your favorite band, which I don't know, like, is there anyone today who still says Nirvana is their favorite band? Unless Nirvana is your favorite band. I feel like it's a little bit trite when you are going over the 90s rocks. All love Nirvana. Everybody, everybody likes Nirvana. I get it that.

[C]

What's the distinction between Nirvana and Pearl Jam? I know Pearl Jam obviously still exists and all that, but what do you think the musical distinction is? Well, I think Pearl Jam had some enduring sound that eluded Nirvana.

[B]

Well, I don't know because Nirvana wasn't around long enough. Okay. I don't know if Nirvana would have had the. This enduring sound if they would have kept creating music after those first.

[A]

Pretty confident in that one.

[B]

How. How do you know? How do you know? Because bands break up all the time. How do you know?

[A]

Well, because their. Their music still holds up.

[B]

Right. But how do you know they were.

[A]

They were a three piece, so their sound was always this garage rock type of style. And that is always going to be a timeless sound.

[C]

Oh, I'll push back on that. The evidence available to us is. And obviously Kurt Cobain was the driving force of Nirvana, but Dave Grohl's band, the Foo Fighters, he seems like a nice human being for all he does in the community or for the world at large, philanthropically. But I have yet to hear anybody make a good case that every Foo Fighter song doesn't sound exactly like every other Foo Fighter song. The only distinction between them is when they're plugged in or acoustic.

[B]

That's.

[C]

That's how they differentiate their music. Grohl unplugs and he. And he goes acoustic. Otherwise the. The songs are indistinguishable. Meantime, how we got into all this conversation is. It is in 1997. Yesterday was the anniversary of the release of okay, Computer, which I declare, hyperbolically or otherwise, the greatest album of all time. It recently jumped to number one on my all time album rankings list. Just jumping past Eat a Peach by the Allman Brothers and Physical Graffiti by Led Zeppelin and pretty much every other recorded album.

[B]

Okay Computer is a great album. No one's going to push back against that.

[A]

It's not the greatest album of all time because I think you have to be the greatest Radiohead album of all time. And it is certainly a top. Pablo, honey, no, I'm a kid. A. I'm One of those in rainbows guys. I'm one of those in rainbows guys. I like in rainbows best. And then I like Kid A.

[C]

And then.

[A]

Okay, computer.

[B]

Okay. Can I defend myself, though, for a second about the Dave Matthews Band accusations?

[D]

What?

[A]

Are they not true?

[B]

Well, I mean, like, Dave Matthews. Yeah, I guess I like Dave Matthews Band, but they had been forever my wife's favorite band. My wife got me into Pink Floyd when we started dating when we're younger. They were her favorite. What, this entire segment? Oh, my.

[A]

Yeah. How many flip flops do you have that have a beer opener on the bottom?

[B]

What? Whatever.

[E]

How many toe rings in the crowd?

[D]

Notice he played the fifth on that one.

[B]

My wife got me into Pink Floyd and then eventually Dave Matthews ban. They're not like, they're still ranging music

[C]

tastes for your wife.

[B]

That.

[C]

That was me.

[A]

She probably likes Drake.

[B]

So. We used to go see Dave Matthews Band every summer. They're always here every summer. We have not been in a few years. All right. We're not as into it as. And she is not into it as much. And I, like, I could take it or leave it. I've seen them enough. Like, I don't need to see them again.

[A]

Dude, there.

[C]

Was she into the Florida Panthers? Is she. Because, like, as a make good. Since you're into Dave Matthews on her behalf, apparently. Does she return the favor? She.

[B]

She likes going with me. Like, she's not going to sit around and watch the Panthers on the very uncomfortable Zazzle Mansion family room couch. Which, by the way, we're getting closer and closer to having a new couch sponsored. If you are interested, hit me up. My DMs are open. But anyway. Yeah, so we're not like. Like, I asked my wife, actually. It's a few days ago. I said to her, so, do you want to go see Dave Matthews Band this month? Because it's, I think, next week. And she's like, no, not interested. Okay, fine. No big deal.

[A]

Matthews Bands are there. Jesus. He's always down here playing West Palm.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Where everyone's just wearing cargo shorts, backwards hats, flip flops, and just bouncing from side to side.

[D]

So, Zach.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

None of the music makes sense.

[A]

It's bad. But there was this video, I guess Dave Matthews Band played Magic Kingdom. And I saw all these videos from it, and I was like, man, I could not concoct a worse place for me to be.

[C]

What if Dave Matthews and Eddie Vedder did a duet that would really sound like.

[B]

Like that. I almost got into a fight at a Dave Matthews Concert. It's true.

[D]

Details, please.

[A]

With Romberg.

[B]

No, that was. No, with Romberg. That was.

[C]

That.

[A]

Who.

[B]

That was with Slipknot. Yeah. No. Romberg almost got into a big fight at. When we saw Slipknot, and that was going to go so poorly for me. It would have went fine for him, but it went. It went really poorly for me, but I. Yeah, I almost got into a fight of the Dave Matthews. Like, we were. All right. Whatever we were. You stepped on my flip flop. Okay, you're. You're really close. So. So. So we're playing Hacky Sack over there. Well, no, this is during the show. No one's playing Hacky Sack during the show. Okay.

[E]

You can't say that with certainty.

[B]

So you're right.

[A]

It was Wes Palm on the lawn.

[B]

You're right.

[A]

There was some Hacky.

[B]

Those lawns are very affordable. You're right. Put it on the poll.

[D]

If you're on the lawn in West Palm beach, is there Hacky Sack being.

[B]

I put my.

[A]

I put my beach towel here. This is my spot of the grass.

[B]

You know, there are certain areas now on the lawn that are reserved. Yeah, it's not. It's not the free for all it used to be.

[A]

Oh, I hate that place. I stop. I rarely go to that venue. Now I just do seats and nice little secret. They have like this, like, little mid club area.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

With like, great patio furniture.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You go the day of the concert and upgrade your tickets. It'll cost you like, 40 bucks. I did that for big boy and Kid Cudi. Three seats got upgraded. Was in my own little patio section.

[B]

Yeah. It's all like a.

[A]

Like a little sun sports pregame show.

[D]

That's the venue where Tony and I both went and saw Alanis Morissette.

[E]

I was taken against my will.

[B]

Hold on a second. All right.

[D]

I was like, not together. Oh, yeah, no, we didn't go together.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

But that would have been awesome. I would have loved to teach him about jagged little pills.

[B]

I sat in those sweet seats one time at the amphitheater for. For a comedy festival there. I had those seats. It was wonderful. Anyway, you do get to a certain age where it's like, I can't be in the lawn anymore. I have to be in seats because

[A]

you might get in a fight.

[B]

Okay. Well, the. The fight that I almost got into at Dave Matthews Band, we were actually in the pit. Okay. So it was right up front. Right in front of.

[C]

That's my cooler of hard lemonades. Beat it.

[B]

So. So it was one of those deals where, like, you know, stupid. You know, you know, stupid, drunk college kid who was there with his girlfriend and kept bumping into my wife and, like, what am I supposed to do in that spot? Kept bumping into her, like, once, twice. It gets to the place where, like, you know, kind of gently shove him off and then like, by the third time. All right, now he needs to get shoved.

[C]

And.

[B]

And I need to, you know, you

[C]

want to get a room, and I

[B]

need to let him know what's what. Now. Now I will tell you. I will tell you, because I don't know if, you know. You know, my stature. I'm not a big guy, all right?

[C]

And.

[A]

But for a Dave Matthews Band concert, like, above average.

[B]

Yeah. I was going to be afraid of any.

[A]

You're one of the tougher guys.

[B]

I was going to push him in your flip flops. That's why I like going to Dave Matthews Band, because they all make me look tough. All right? I will admit. I will admit that. That when. When I was in this guy's face now, and I was ready for whatever. With my opposite hand, I did tap my other friend who was there with his wife, okay? And he's a big guy. He's a former baseball player, like a former professional baseball player. And I did. I did tap him just so he could be aware of the happenings. Right. Now I got a little bit more courage.

[A]

Go to this venue with former athletes.

[C]

Backup.

[B]

That's right. I do. I do. So anyway, how old were you when

[A]

you tried to fight Zaslow?

[C]

And Wayne Gretzky has this samanka with him.

[B]

How old was I, Marty McSorley, when

[A]

you tried to fight this college kid, how old were you?

[B]

I would say this was 10 years ago. So I was mid-30s. Yeah.

[A]

You feel good about that?

[B]

What? I had to defend my wife. And you know what? I take it back. He was probably, like, mid-20s. He was probably mid-20s, but at that point. Whatever. If someone who's mid-20s steps to you not gonna back down.

[A]

Yeah. No one touches my wife unless I say so. And I sit down over there.

[B]

How dare you?

[C]

He was there celebrating his bar mitzvah, and Zazlow's getting in his face.

[A]

Did the option of you switching seats with your wife actually pop up?

[B]

Well, it wasn't seats. We were in the pit. Yeah, we're in the pit. We're standing the whole.

[A]

And you know how the pit goes at a Dave Matthews Band concert. Oh, yeah.

[B]

It can get rough, you know? Yeah.

[A]

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[C]

I know it well.

[E]

It's usually when I show up, everybody goes crazy.

[A]

Yeah. You usually take all the credit for it, but it's because Tony usually walks in with Cuervo.

[C]

Walking like this.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Cuervo is a thing that turns hanging out into this is the night.

[E]

It has that effect on people.

[A]

It does. You usually take the credit for it, but again, it's the Cuervo effect. It's like that moment in a big game where everyone in the crowd just starts standing up, hooting and hollering. Keep it Cuervo.

[C]

Cuervo, baby.

[B]

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[B]

Don Le how you love that cat. Bad news for opposing teams in the triple air stall. Smiles till LeBron. Clutch again. Clutch again. Clutch again. This is the Dan Levatar show with the Stugats.

[C]

I don't like. I. I don't understand what goes on with that Dave Matthews Band. Who is this, this creep, this vein, this. This narcissist Dave Matthews, who says the whole band is named after me? And why doesn't anyone else push back in the band? They've all been in the band for however long. A quarter century. That's not enough. That's not enough time. Under your. Your rule, Dave Matthews, you creep. You evil man, dictating to me that I'm in your band. We're all in a band together, friend.

[B]

All right. There you go. Didn't expect the show.

[C]

You know what happened to me the other day?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Let me tell you something very quickly. If you're talking about confrontation quickly. The other day, I'm pulling, okay, I'm pulling onto the one ON one freeway here in Los Angele, and the guy in front of me is not moving quickly enough for my taste. On the other side of the street is a cop car. He's writing a ticket to somebody for a traffic violation. The guy, as I'm trying to get onto the ramp to get onto the freeway, is very slow in front of me, starting to stop. He's on his cell phone the whole time, so much so that I'm just. I'm gesticulating wildly, and then I'm honking my horn and otherwise. And now he stops his car in the road before the ramp and gets out of his car, not seeing the cop across the street writing the ticket. And he holds up a bad. And he says, stop tailgating me, MFer. And then realizes as he says that, oh, there's a real cop right across the street there. He's now flashed a badge. He's just a random guy doing that. And I say to the cop, you see that? He saw. He just showed me a fake badge. The guy's across the cops across the street, so he doesn't follow what's happening there. The guy realizes, though, oh, I better not. I better get out of here. And he jumps in his car, and he jumps in the freeway and is weaving in and out of traffic, and I'm trying to follow him to take a picture of his license plate. What should I do here? I now have an image of this guy's license plate who claimed to be a cop. Do I turn him in?

[B]

Okay, hold on a second. Was anyone else in the car with you?

[C]

Yes.

[B]

Your child?

[C]

It was a child.

[B]

Was it your. Your child?

[C]

No, it was Dave Matthews child.

[B]

I said, was it your child? And your response was, yes, it was that child.

[E]

Was it Hoover?

[C]

It was the kid you almost kicked the ass up for touching your wife. What do you mean? Who? Yeah, yeah, it was my child,

[D]

Chris.

[C]

Flashing a badge. Flashing a badge. Don't tailgate me, Mf. Or do you think. Do I think that you're a cop when you tell me don't tailgate you mfer so hold up a badge at

[A]

me, Dave, did you just decide you're gonna chase this guy and not.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

And not explain it to the child in the car after you, I guess, suspended your chase? Did you explain what was going on? Did your child put it together?

[C]

Imagine Dave. Dave provided a running commentary of what was going down in the moment. So the little one in the backseat knew and they were a part of it, you know, they were my deputy.

[B]

Get him. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what you should do in that spot. But I like that. That the child that you had in the car with you was. Was not afraid. That's important.

[C]

No, no, no, no.

[B]

We were.

[C]

We were rocking. We did an up tempo Dave song, you know, to really get our juice.

[B]

Oh, so while you were following. While you were following, like you put on some tunes.

[C]

That's right. Yeah.

[B]

All right.

[C]

That's interesting soundtrack.

[B]

That's interesting. Well, baby driver, we'll get to the basketball from last night as the Knicks went up two games to none of the. We got basketball tonight. Game three, series shifts to San Antonio. But there continues to be rumors if we're talking about the NBA, there continue to be Giannis Antetokounmpo rumors. All right? And apparently if you look on these, you know, you look on some of the wagering sites, some of them have the Miami Heat as the prohibitive favorite to land Giannis Antetokounmpo. Now there's certainly something to be said for the idea of do you give up all these players, you give up all these assets for just Giannis Antetokounmpo? When you see what San Antonio is doing, when you see what Oklahoma City's doing, heck, even when you see what's going on with New York, I mean, does acquiring Giannis put you in a position where you think you're competing with one of those teams? But what if I were to tell you you could acquire Giannis and maybe there's another superstar that you could wind up acquiring? Like for instance, what if because Messiah Jiri is shaking things up in Dallas, could I interest you in a Kyrie Irving not instead of Giannis, but what if you find a way to get both? That's something that would interest you, man.

[A]

All right, this one's an interesting one because the Kyrie's. What, what, what's his, what's his salary cap number?

[E]

He will 40 hair under 40.

[D]

I think it's 39.5 million and then he'll have a player option for the following season at 42, 4.

[A]

I guess you can get them cheap. You just need to make salaries work out. Right. But I'm over here worried about Giannis's body. I mean, Kyrie's body gives out on him all the time. Remember, he missed the finals pretty much against Celtics, right. He's always hurt, but that's probably the type of guy you need to target if you're looking to add a third star to BAM and Giannis, and that's an attainable one because you're probably going to be depleted some assets here, right? So that's the kind of star that you're looking at. It's interesting. I mean, you're not. Your season will be undone by injury, but you have the off chance that if they're all healthy at the same time, you have the interior defense and honestly perimeter defense of Bam. Both of them come out and can guard the perimeter right now and Kyrie was no slouch. We'll see what he is. I yeah, it might be worth a shot. Might be worth a shot.

[E]

Last time Kyrie played 60 games was 22, 23. Other than that, 40, 20, 58, 50.

[D]

Yeah, I mean health would be a huge part of that. Health would be a huge part of if a third guy you were going after was Kawhi Leonard. Health would be a big thing. If you were going after 42 year old LeBron James, like no matter what, health is going to be a thing. Health would be A thing with John Morant. But that's also part of why the trade and free agent markets for these guys all seem to be relatively depressed from what you would expect. For the names that we're talking about,

[E]

would you rather have Kyrie or Ja?

[A]

Ja.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Okay, hold on. That's interesting.

[A]

That's an interesting. He said J. I was like, wait, that's another superstar that I can get on the cheap. And yes, I think John Morant would

[B]

come cheaper than Kyrie Irving.

[D]

It's because he has more money attached,

[B]

even though, even though he's significantly younger. I, I, I, I think Dallas would want to look like. I think Memphis just wants to get rid of John Morant, while I think Dallas would want a little something in return.

[A]

Now, we have to keep in mind both Kyrie, because the Miami Heat were considering Kyrie. I think I recall these reports correctly and they decided against it. You know, given Mickey, this is when

[B]

he was back in Brooklyn, this is

[A]

when Kyrie was going through it.

[D]

Different time.

[A]

He is settled down.

[E]

It was a different.

[A]

And the Miami Heat had the discussion very recently on John Moran and decided against it. So right now we're hypothetically identifying two stars that are risk reward type of dudes that the franchise has already decided at least one time in their history. That's not for us, but it might have to be. Considering how much they give up for a guy like Giannis.

[D]

It depends on what you ultimately are able to get Giannis for. If you are able to get Giannis, like I don't want to assume the clothes there. I've been burned by this before. But if, if the Heat were able to pair Giannis with Bam Adebayo, then you end up in a situation where you go, okay, we've set ourselves up purposefully for this season and for next.

[B]

Yeah, it becomes, it becomes a right now thing.

[D]

So yeah, it becomes right now and you have guys who are, you know, either Andrew Wiggins opting out of a deal or as a potential sign in trade in that scenario or an expiring deal, you'd have Norman Powell as a potential sign in trade. So there's, there's money to play with.

[A]

Zaz, what do you do?

[B]

I, okay, are you asking me would I be interested in Kyrie Irving or are we doing Kyrie or Ja?

[A]

I mean, either way, like they come with some risk. But it, I think with how the lottery broke for Miami now I'm kind of more in on the honest thing where before I was like, I was kind of in on this lottery Pick. But I think you want.

[B]

I think you just. You want the Heat to do something. You want them to shake it up in some fashion. You want to be excited for next season in some way. I think that's probably where you stand. So I'm in on them acquiring Giannis, especially if it means that they don't have to give up everything that you thought that maybe they would have to give up at the trade deadline. If the temperature around the league on Giannis Antetokounmpo is in fact, lukewarm, then, yeah, I. That's. That's your quintessential Heat move, where you try and pounce on a disgruntled player, a disgruntled star, and you can get him when the. When the atmosphere around the league is lukewarm on him. That's a. That's a Heat move. So, yes, I'd be good with them doing that.

[E]

When you heard that report that the market has been lukewarm, and obviously Bill Simmons, that makes me more interested. Talked about it on the pod a couple of days ago. It was like, oh, wait a second. If. If people are lukewarm on it and you can maybe get a little bit less of an offer, like, that's a very interesting situation. Now you have to backfill the roster. Norman Powell becomes super interesting because that redundant skill set of him and Tyler. Tyler's gone. You need Warren Powell, Norman Powell back in.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And. And I would like. Yeah, I think that there are going to be guys out there that you can also acquire. Maybe it's a John Moran, which is something that was talked about, by the way, back in January or February. Can the Heat acquire both of those guys? I think if you're going to do it, do it. You know, like, go out there and acquire that second guy. If we're talking about, would I be more interested in John Morant or more interested in Kyrie Irving? That one's tough. I think I'd be more interested. Ja can't shoot.

[E]

He can't shoot with a lip, and he hasn't gone to the rim.

[C]

But on the other hand, then again, Kyrie hates the Jews, so it's like six.

[B]

That is something that, you know, sticks

[C]

out to make my job more difficult.

[B]

Yeah, that is something that.

[E]

He's got great handles, though, guys.

[B]

I know, but.

[C]

Yeah, see, then that's the other.

[A]

You know, what I'm doing

[D]

on behalf of the Jews. Come on down.

[B]

You don't speak for us.

[A]

I don't think you can.

[E]

Wow.

[A]

Yeah, we're good.

[C]

Right.

[A]

You got another one over there?

[B]

No, no. That is.

[C]

You do.

[B]

You do not speak for all of us. Last night, the New York Knicks pull away in the second half. They go up two games and not on the Cavaliers. You know, we're gonna get all the this series is over stuff, and that makes me nuts. You know why that makes me not Steve Damaschek? It makes me nuts because they're, they're seemingly people who say that this series over. And you're gonna get that all day today on television and on radio that this series is over. There's a difference between the series being over and believing the Knicks are going to win. I believe the Knicks are going to win this series the same way I believe the Knicks were going to win the series before it began. But you can't say that the series is over before Cleveland's even played a home game. I mean, Cleveland was down 02 to Detroit, and then they went. They won the next three games, including the next two, which were at home. But we're going to count Cleveland out before they even play a home game. That's going to make me nuts all day today, Dave. People declaring this series is over. I hate that. A major pet peeve of mine.

[C]

I hear you. And you know, I have asked some people before a Super bowl if it's a must win game. And so we get.

[B]

That's a good question.

[C]

These terms. Yeah, well, we get fast and loose with the idea of like it's over. But, you know, I think what you're pointing at is. Is ultimately accurate. This is a very tall mountain for a team to climb. With James Harden trying to defend the score of the other team throughout, it does seem unlikely that the Cavs are going to rally here. But I take your larger point. I appreciate it.

[G]

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[A]

Don LeBatard, you're a big disappointment, Paul Pierce. My I'm only upset right now that I don't get to do this in person. Paul Pierce. How disappointed is it to be a Miami fan right now? Stugats, brother. Actually, you make a really great point. This is the Dan Levitar show with

[B]

the st, By the way.

[C]

Just very quickly, I don't want to get back to three minutes ago, but Giannis, if you get. And assuming LeBron is not pursued by the Lakers, isn't that the. The formula that makes the most sense? Luca with Giannis, then I. I'm. I'm with you on the heat. That Giannis doesn't make them rightly a contender in the East. Just plugging Giannis into what they have going isn't enough to compete with the high end. You put Giannis with Luca for at least a season or two now.

[D]

I mean, why would. Why would he ever go to the West?

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

I mean, why would he ever want that?

[B]

Do you see what's going. Do you see who plays for San Antonio? Like, why. Listen, why would any.

[C]

I'm just talking about.

[A]

If you're.

[C]

If you're talking about on a piece of paper, what is a compelling, you know, core. If. If you keep. If you keep Austin Reeves plus Luca, plus Giannis, okay? Now that. That has the makings of a team that Viably could make a deep playoff run. Right. No matter who else is out there. I get what's going on with Wemb, OKC and otherwise, but that's the west, and that's been the story for 30 years.

[B]

So I went into the game last night very transparent about what I was hoping for, and that was for James Harden to just have another embarrassing game, too, because I like that narrative. I like that storyline. I don't like the player. I don't like how he plays. And, like, he was fine last night. Like, it wasn't good, but I don't know, it wasn't terrible.

[E]

I don't know. We talked about on the alley OOP last night, me, Tristan, Juju. If you look at his counting stats, you're gonna be fooled and think, oh, he had an okay game, a lot of those.

[B]

He had two assists.

[E]

He had two assists. No turnovers, finally. But when you look at his time, went 6 for 15. He had a couple of shots that went in.

[B]

He was good in the first half,

[E]

but he was 2 for 14, like, halfway through the game. Like, it just wasn't good.

[B]

Well, that's not true, but. Because I think he was like 4 of 8 at halftime. Like, he. He was actually. He was. He said halftime. I'm talking about third. Third quarter. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He didn't do anything in the second half. The first half. He was. It was all Right into anything in the second half. So, like, yet he had a nothing game. All right. He really did. He was like a nothing last night. If Adam Silver was at the game last night, he walked up to James Harden, he said, welcome to the club. He had a nothing game last night, though.

[C]

He's fat, though. That's. That's the excuse. You know, they give him some grace there.

[B]

He's heavyset, and Adam Silver is very thin. I mean, you've seen him, right? Look a little bit gaunt. Anyway, it's neither here nor there. Josh Hart last night with 26 points, had the monster game. But I want to show you this. So, you know, they pan to the celebrities all throughout the game. I love that celebrity row in New York. I love the dynamics, Dave, of the celebrity row where, like, if you are a celebrity, if you are a movie star, TV star, what have you want to go to the Knicks game, you say to your agent, right? You're like, hey, you know, can, you know, see what kind of tickets we can get? And what if. What if. What if you come back and you're offered with. Because they don't purchase these seats, like the Knicks have the seats and they give them to you. You know, hey, come, come sit celebrity row. What if you're. What if you're. You're given row B? You know, like, what's the, what's the tipping point for what's kind of celebrity you have to be where. All right, I'll. I'll sit row B. Or it's, I can't be seen in row B. I got to sit row A.

[C]

You know, it is A. You know, I'll post images, I'll take. Take my boys to a ball game or whatever, and people. Randos in on social media will weigh in. Like, that's the seat you got. You didn't get better seats than that. People critique where I'm sitting. The world has become more and more, if you aren't aware about the haves and have nots, and the have are about two dozen people through which all the rest of us are supposed to live vicariously. Ben Stiller happens to be one of those people. And we're all supposed to swoon because he has an HD image of James Harden in close up at msg. And we're all supposed to, like I say, swoon over this because, of course, we're no longer. That's no longer accessible to any of the rest of us. There is Kevin Hart, there's the Rock, there's Ben Stiller, and a short List of other people, like I say, through which we will experience the world.

[B]

So here, you know, as Dave Damasek mentions, for the visual audience, Ben Stiller is sitting celebrity row. And that. That's video that he's taking.

[D]

Beautiful video.

[B]

Well, yeah, but like, I don't get that. He's. He's at game two of the Eastern Conference finals, and it's just like, let me take out my phone and start record. You're at the game. Why didn't he record? Or is there going to be a moment? What's his wife's name again? Christine. Christine Taylor. Is that her name? All right. I mean, she's a big time actress. I want to make sure I get her name right. Is there a time where they're single? Hey, Christine, let's watch the video I took from the game. We were sitting first. Like, really? I don't understand that.

[C]

For whom, right? That's exactly right. That the question is always that I have. Whenever you are, you know, seeing the great sights of Europe or the bayou or San Francisco or otherwise, what. You ask the exact questions aslo. That is absolutely. What are you doing with that video? For whom? Is it like, do you scroll back through it in 10 years? I don't think you do. So basically drop the camera and experience. Drink it in with your actual eyeballs because this video that you think future you is going to enjoy does not exist.

[B]

Ryan, I do understand what you're saying where if you go to a sporting event and you post a picture and then you'll get the messages where it's like, wow, those are the best seats you can get. I remember going back, this is. This is like a dozen years ago when I was doing the morning show here in Miami on 790 a ticket with joy Taylor. And she went to Marlins opening day. It's like, I mean, it's the only day of the year where there's gonna be a lot of people there. And she was sitting in the upper deck in center field. Upper deck, center field. And she posts the picture too. You know, hey, you know, having a great time. You know what I told her? You're embarrassing the show. I said that to her. So what are you doing? You're embarrassing the show. Center field's one thing. Okay, outfield, you're Joy Taylor. You're sitting in the outfield. Upper deck, you're embarrassing my shot.

[E]

It's so far from where home plate is, too. It's like, it's like a mile long.

[B]

Yeah, that's right.

[C]

But. But it's Football, this is the one I'm thinking of. I took me and Jean Claude Van Damask went over to see Ben Roethlisberger's last game with the Steelers when they paid a visit to the Chargers in Sofi. And we were up high at the 50, which is where I like to sit to see football games and that people reacted to that.

[B]

You like to sit at the 50? You like to the 50.

[C]

What I like to do is I like to sit up high. The, the, the, the basic rule is, I think we can all agree, is football up high, hockey up high, down low, up close, baseball, basketball.

[B]

How high though?

[C]

That's the basic group.

[B]

How high?

[C]

I mean, I like to see the, the whole field. I like to see it play out. I like, I like the All 22, if you will.

[B]

How high is this?

[C]

A bit. You're trying to. No, I think you're trying to set me up.

[B]

No, like, are you.

[C]

What, what, what is the measurement? 600 level. Is that relatable? Is that a universal.

[B]

You know what? You know what? That's too high. If you're in the 600 left. If you told me you're going to the game tonight, I say where your seats? You go 600 level. Like, buddy, get some better.

[E]

What are you at home?

[C]

I mean, I listen, I let, like I say not, not for basketball, I don't want to be up there. That, that, that doesn't, that doesn't suit my, my interests. But yes, football, hockey, I want to see the whole thing. Basketball, the, the quickness, that's, that's the appeal of that is, is, is the speed at which they play. It's, it's jaw dropping. I don't need to see where all 10 guys are. It's pretty easy for my eye to drink all of that in. Same goes for baseball. I want to see the pace of the pitches. And otherwise football, I can be way high up there and track the whole thing.

[B]

I just think it's interesting that your preferred area to sit is the 50 yard line.

[C]

That's, that's where we should it be. And for football, where should it be? The end.

[B]

Of course it should be the 50 yard line. Dave, that's not right. Yes, of course it should be the 50 yard line.

[C]

It wasn't bragging about that. I wasn't, I wasn't trying to make a point, a distinction. Of course the only place to sit for football is the 50 yard line. If you have a choice, right place.

[B]

The only place to.

[C]

Now in hockey, in hockey, I like behind the choices A lot of behind the goal. The team that you're rooting for shoots at twice. That's.

[B]

Well, that goes without saying. No one, no one's ever said to their kid, where do you want to sit? Would you like to sit on the shoot one side? No, it's always the shoot twice side. Yes, of course.

[C]

I think people who lack attention to detail might buy tickets and say, oh, we're behind the goal. Like, you have to ask the question, is it the one that we're rooting for? They shooting at it twice?

[E]

Of course.

[B]

Isn't it amazing?

[C]

Everybody's not expert like you, Zaslo. I'm a man of the people. I'm trying to give. I'm trying to provide some counsel for people. And you're jumping to the end of the story as though everybody's up to speed like you are.

[B]

Isn't it amazing? By the way, like, you're saying where you prefer to sit. I'm being serious now. You're saying where you prefer to sit for a game. I'm saying where I prefer to sit for the game. The youngins, the Utes. All right. Who are listening and watching right now. Isn't it crazy to think back, there was a time where, and not that long ago, where you would buy tickets to a sporting event and like, you didn't really get to pick where your seats were. You would say to the, to the person who is behind the glass, like, what do you have available? And she's like, I got, I got 10th row, you know, on the 10 yard line. Like, they wouldn't tell you it's on the aisle. It was just like, all right, I'll take those tickets, you know? Yeah.

[D]

Oh, I don't remember.

[B]

You didn't get to pull up Ticketmaster on online and look at the blue dots and pick which ones you want to sit in. Like, you just. I want two tickets. I hope they're good seats.

[A]

You don't remember box offices?

[D]

Yeah, of course I remember a box office, but I, I don't remember being in a position to not know where my seats were.

[B]

Yeah, just like, hey, I would at

[D]

least ask, like, hey, is it on the aisle? Is it in the middle of the road?

[B]

No. You know what would happen? You would go and you'd have to say, give me two of your best available. That's what it was. Best available. And I mean, the seats could be anywhere. What a time to be alive.

[C]

Is it still foreign to young or has it become foreign to young people? The idea of going to a movie and just going into the theater and then finding your seats, Is it assumed for younger people that you know where you're going to be sitting? What the hell are you guys talking about?