Podcast Summary: The Dating Detectives

Episode: The Devil You Know: Part 2
Date: October 27, 2025
Hosts: Mackenzie Fultz (A), Hanna Anderson (B)
Guest: Abby (C)

Overview

This episode is the second part of Abby’s harrowing true story, revealing her entanglement with an emotionally manipulative and abusive partner, “Peter.” Private Investigator Mackenzie Fultz and comedian Hanna Anderson guide Abby as she details her relationship, the escalation of coercion and exploitation, and her eventual escape—with the help of a friend. This episode dives deep into digital sexual exploitation, psychological and financial abuse, and the complexities of leaving an abuser. It’s an eye-opening discussion on modern dating dangers, coercion, and the importance of community and support systems.

Recap & Background (01:22–03:52)

• Abby met Peter in college: He was socially awkward but seemed innocent and sweet.
• Odd behaviors early on: Claimed to have "multiple personality disorder," introduced an alternate persona “Doug,” and later alleged he had throat cancer.
• Abuse begins: Peter stalked Abby and her family after a breakup.
• Abby suffers sexual assault (by a roommate, not Peter): Peter supports her during her trauma, worming his way back into her life.
• Manipulation escalates: Peter sows doubt about Abby’s mental health, convincing her (and a therapist) that she is bipolar and needs medication—making her mentally cloudy and vulnerable.
• Financial instability during COVID: Peter stops working; Abby loses her job and supports them financially.
• Major breach: Abby discovers Peter has started an OnlyFans account in her name, using her nude images without consent.

Key Discussion Points & Notable Moments

1. Digital Sexual Exploitation and OnlyFans Ordeal

(04:09–23:27)

• Peter reveals OnlyFans scam: Shows Abby an account with their bodies (no faces) under her real name, using images she’d shared privately.
  • “I freak out. I was raised Catholic. … My dad’s also a judge…” (C, 04:29)
• Non-consensual distribution: Peter admits talking to “hundreds of people a day” as Abby, sending her photos. She never saw messages or control of account but knows identifying tattoos make her recognizable.
  • “You should feel really violated and really bad.” (C, 06:00)
• Peter’s justification: “A bunch of women are doing this to make money, and I thought this would be a nice thing.” (Peter via Abby, 06:35)
• Coercion escalates: Financial desperation (“can’t pay rent”) leads Peter to pressure Abby into creating content. He claims a famous OnlyFans creator wants to collaborate.
• Trauma response and coercion: Abby, medicated and desperate for basic needs (feeding herself and her cats), feels she has no choice. The “meeting” turns out to be filming in a hotel room; other women involved. She dissociates completely during the experience.
  • “I was completely the opposite. I was really quiet… really trying to be as small as I possibly could.” (C, 15:04)
  • “He tells me, ‘You should feel so empowered… this is women taking back sexual power.’” (C, 16:17)
• Long-term psychological effects: Dissociation, blurry memories, stress-related illness, and lasting trauma.
• Further coercion: Peter claims a creator “Duncan” could send dangerous people after them if they quit, forcing Abby to continue making content.
  • “This is trafficking.” (A, 20:09; C confirms, 20:21)
• Host reflections: Highlight how tech outpaces law enforcement and how coercion routes through unmet needs—especially financial desperation.

Standout Quote

“Coercive manipulation, coercion. They prey on unmet needs. And in this case, it was financial instability. … You wanted to survive. And Peter preyed on that.”
(B, 21:07–21:24)

2. Swingers Clubs, Parties, and Further Exploitation

(23:27–27:08)

• Peter pushes Abby into swinger parties for 'networking': Using “Duncan's” non-compete demands as another justification for control.
• Abby describes more dissociation: Feels sick, anxious, but shuts down emotionally and physically to get through events.
• Manipulation continues unchecked: Peter uses her bisexuality as “evidence” she should be fine with polyamory.

3. Physical Escape & Marriage

(27:08–35:41)

• Move to New Mexico: Abby tries to reset her life, getting physically distant from Peter's network and the creators.
• Marriage: They have a large wedding, but Abby feels mentally absent. (She trips down the aisle, which hosts joke may have been a sign.)

4. Financial Manipulation, Drug Abuse, and Peter’s Downward Spiral

(37:13–42:56)

• Family support misused: Abby’s parents loan Peter $15,000 for a business, which he squanders; he then starts charging things to her father’s credit card.
• Drug abuse: Peter begins daily LSD use, claiming “spiritual” motives and displaying cult-like thinking, including dreams of a “harem” or commune.

5. Multiple “Throuple” Attempts and Emotional Abuse

(42:56–46:15)

• Attempts at polyamory: Tries to rope Abby's close friends (Kira, Laura) into throuples, mostly secretly and through manipulation.
• Peter isolates Abby: Uses gaslighting, lies, and pitting roommates against each other.

6. Digital Surveillance and Control

(46:15–50:44)

• In-home spying: Peter uses “cat cams” to secretly listen to Abby and Laura’s private conversations.
  • “There’s a cat cam in the corner… He said, ‘absolutely not. … these cat cams are only visual.’ … But every time we’d have these conversations, he’d come back that night and tell us [what we’d said]…” (C, 46:15–50:44)
• Confrontation: Peter admits to listening in, feigns embarrassment, and asks for couples therapy.

7. Breaking Free: Therapy, Support, and “Gray Rocking”

(50:44–64:31)

• Therapy illuminates manipulation: Abby’s new therapist debunks her “bipolar” diagnosis and helps her get off the powerful, mind-altering meds.
  • “When I got taken off [the medication] …it was like inching forward in clarity… I was very lucid and I was much more—Peter called it aggressive, I’d call it present.” (C, 54:26)
• Building a support system: Enlists Sam (Peter’s supposed best friend) as an in-house protector. Sam’s presence blocks Peter’s attempts at isolation and control.
• Gray rocking strategy: Abby stops reacting to Peter’s provocations, depriving him of drama and attention—slowly prompting him to suggest divorce as a “kink.”

Memorable Moment

“Peter one day came to me, and he’s just like, I just feel like things aren’t working. What if we get divorced as a kink?”
(C, 62:36; group laughs at the absurdity)

8. Escape, Aftermath, and Moving Forward

(64:31–77:27)

• Divorce finalized: Abby escapes, with Sam’s support acting as a buffer for safety.
• Discovering more lies: Post-divorce, Abby and Sam exchange stories and timelines, uncovering fabrications about Peter’s purported trips, other relationships (even referencing a minor), and family background.
  • “[Peter] created a fake relationship and love interest with a minor…” (C, 65:14)
• Future relationships: Abby and Sam begin dating, providing Abby with a safe, supportive partnership for healing.
  • “He was showing his love in a way, even if he was never going to be with you… by providing you that safety…” (B, 73:25)
• Confronting OnlyFans: When Abby reaches out, they tell her that records are “wiped,” and she receives no justice or information.
  • “They told me that all the information from the account has been wiped. So they have no record of anything…” (C, 76:59)
  • “That is absolutely false. … I think they do not want to get sued. … I think it can be subpoenaed in a court of law.” (B, 77:27)

Notable Discussion

• Should Abby warn Peter’s new partner, a 19-year-old likely being exploited?**
  • Hosts discuss pros and cons—ultimately agreeing Abby must do what’s best for her healing, though the instincts to warn others are strong.

9. Reflection, Advice, and Support

(74:53–76:53, 98:40–100:14)

• Advice for survivors:

  • “Talk to your people, talk to your friends, talk to your family. If you are a victim or somebody who’s trying to support a victim, you have to communicate the things that are uncomfortable.” (C, 74:53)
  • “Sometimes they roll your eyes…and they close the door… but they still hear you. …You kind of go back to that. When you’re looking for help, you kind of hear those words.” (B, 75:16)
  • “Make sure to be supportive and just like, no judgment.” (C, 76:38)

• Community matters:

  • The importance of nonjudgmental support, open communication, showing up for others, and the value of sharing these stories for collective safety and healing.
  • “A lot of people say they don’t share their story because it just sounds so outlandish. … We will. We’ll listen to you. We’ll believe you.” (B, 99:46)

On Legal Gaps and Platform Liability

• Discussion on how tech platforms like OnlyFans are failing to keep up with abuse, the lack of robust legal protections around coercion and digital trafficking, and calls for legislative and platform change.
  • “OnlyFans is supposed to be a place where it’s like, ‘Oh, giving women the right to take back your sexuality’ ... but you also have to protect the people…” (B, 85:28)
  • “The laws need to be rewritten in a way that allows for coercion and allows for the prosecution of those aspects…” (B, 87:18)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Recap & Trigger Warnings: 01:22–03:52
• OnlyFans Exploitation Revealed & Reaction: 04:09–09:00
• Escalation, Coercion, and Digital Trafficking: 09:00–23:27
• Swingers Parties & Dissociation: 23:27–27:08
• Marriage & New Mexico: 27:08–35:41
• Financial/Drug Manipulation: 37:13–42:56
• Throuple Attempts & Further Isolation: 42:56–46:15
• Hidden Cat Cam Surveillance: 46:15–50:44
• Therapy, Medication, and Regaining Clarity: 50:44–55:51
• Gray Rocking & Orchestrating Escape: 55:51–64:31
• Aftermath, New Relationship, and OnlyFans Dead Ends: 64:31–77:27
• Survivor Support & Advice: 74:53–76:53; revisited at 98:40–99:46
• Platform & Legal Gaps: 85:28–94:22

Tone and Language

The conversation is frank, compassionate, trauma-informed, and laced with both empathy and humor—a signature of the Dating Detectives. The hosts oscillate between professional insight as investigators and warm, supportive friend energy.

Memorable Quotes

• “This is trafficking.” (A, 20:09)
• “Coercive manipulation, coercion. They prey on unmet needs.” (B, 21:07)
• “It’s not a nice thing. No. I feel really violated and really bad.” (C, 06:32)
• “He’s completely worn me down… I just don’t have any backbone.” (C, 26:13)
• “If you are a victim or supporting one, you have to communicate—whether or not they listen, they’ll hear you.” (C & B, 74:53–75:32)
• “He weaponized mental illness.” (A, 81:48)

Takeaways & Lessons

• Coercion is abuse—regardless of whether there’s physical force. Financial need, medication-induced confusion, and isolation were all weaponized.
• Digital platforms are fertile ground for abusers—and are failing to protect victims.
• Legal definitions lag far behind reality for online coercion and exploitation.
• Support, community, and leaving are difficult, but possible with help. Abby’s friend Sam’s practical support and unwavering presence were crucial.
• Don’t minimize your precautions. Concern about surveillance is justified.
• Victims are not alone. The value of talking, sharing, and nonjudgmental listening is immense.

Final Thoughts

Abby’s story exposes an urgent problem: how coercion, tech, and trauma intersect in abusive relationships. It’s a testament to resilience, the power of small acts of friendship and support, and the need for legislative and institutional reform. As always, the hosts remind listeners: “Trust your intuition.”

For resources, visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.