Podcast Summary: The Dating Detectives

Episode: The Therapist, the Addiction, and the Secret Plan B
Date: November 24, 2025
Hosts: Private Investigator Mackenzie Fultz & Comedian Hanna Anderson
Guest: Meredith Beardmore, Therapist & Author

Episode Overview

In this emotionally charged episode, hosts Mackenzie (Molly) and Hannah sit down with therapist and author Meredith Beardmore to delve into her harrowing personal experience: a marriage upended by addiction, emotional and psychological abuse, shocking discoveries, and ultimately, deep betrayal. Meredith shares her trajectory from a loving partnership through the bewildering onset of her husband's addiction during the pandemic, escalating abuse, uncovering infidelity, and the aftermath of his tragic demise. The conversation brings nuance to topics of addiction, coercive control, divorce, and the complexity of rage and grief—especially as they intersect for women and mothers.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Introducing Meredith & Her Background

• [00:53] Meredith is a therapist and author of The Plan B Chronicles, sharing her story to help others recognize they're not alone, no matter their expertise.
  • “This can happen to everybody, even a therapist...It’s not about you being stupid. You are never stupid. It can happen to anyone.” – Molly [02:21]
  • Meredith also runs a YouTube channel, Mend with Mare, analyzing song lyrics through a therapist’s lens.

Meeting Her Husband: A Serendipitous Start

• [07:38] Meredith’s story begins in New York. She meets her future husband by chance, a sound technician, and they strike an instant connection—swept up in romance, shared values, and the intention to build a stable home, especially for their son.
  • “He was incredibly loving to me and could make me laugh harder than anyone...I thought that I had won the jackpot.” – Meredith [13:12]

Red Flags & Early Warning Signs

• The first small red flags: isolating behaviors, needing Meredith to “prove” her love, minor lapses rationalized by his trauma.
  • “Little hints of things…But that’s not that bad, right?” – Meredith [14:45]
  • Open about his tough past and anxiety, but never manipulative—at first.

The Pandemic: Catalyst for Change

• [06:32] The COVID-19 pandemic upends their lives: Meredith’s therapy practice explodes with need, her husband loses work, and soon, the pressure cooker of isolation and uncertainty triggers a drastic shift.
  • Their son is diagnosed with autism—a major adjustment and additional stressor for the family.

The Onset of Addiction

• [20:04] Her husband, who didn't drink for years, starts binge drinking during lockdown. Episodes become frightening, including a traumatic night when he becomes sexually aggressive during a blackout.
  • “I got up and I climbed in the crib with my son and laid there.” – Meredith [24:02]
  • Meredith begins “sleuthing”—measuring vodka bottles, watering them down, tracking his drinking.

Escalation & Emotional Abuse

• Behaviors become erratic and humiliating: sexual demands at inappropriate moments, anger, and disregard for their son’s well-being.
  • “He just came in, stumbling and I could smell him...‘Give me a blowjob.’ And I was like, our son's right there!” – Meredith [27:01]
• Meredith battles guilt, wondering if burnout and motherhood drove him to drink.

Denial, Coercive Control & Labeling Abuse

• [30:13] Meredith discusses how hard it was to see the unfolding situation as abuse, especially as a mental health professional.
  • “When you’re in it, you don’t realize...I didn’t want the label that I was being abused in my marriage. I’m a therapist!” – Meredith [30:19]

New Layers: Adderall, Job Pressures & Health Decisions

• [31:09] Husband joins a major TV show; crew culture introduces Adderall abuse.
• Fierce conflicts erupt over their son's health care, culminating in suspected acts of sabotage (possibly tampering with Meredith's car to delay medical appointments for their child).

Dangerous Behaviors & Ultimatums

• [39:44] Meredith catches her husband driving drunk with their child—this prompts a harsh ultimatum: rehab or separation.
  • “You go to detox and rehab or we’re done.” – Meredith [40:43]
• He halfheartedly attends detox, checks himself out, and gaslights Meredith about her seriousness.

Physical Abuse & Involving the Police

• [44:13] During a confrontation, he physically injures Meredith by kicking a steel baby gate into her wrist, calls the police on himself, and is briefly hospitalized for a mental health evaluation.
• Meredith is left to manage her own injury and her son’s safety; police and child services become involved.

Discoveries: Identity Fraud and Infidelity

• [56:20] Meredith’s mother uncovers multiple IDs and credit cards stashed in the recycling—some linked to her husband.
• The depth of his addiction is exposed via rehab drug screens: MDMA, benzos, alcohol, amphetamines, marijuana—and meth.
  • “I just was like...this is so much worse than I ever knew.” – Meredith [64:39]
• In his car, Meredith finds a receipt for Plan B, confirming infidelity with a much younger woman (the “COVID nose swabber” on his TV set).

The Shocking Reality & Filing for Divorce

• [66:21] Discovery of the “Plan B” receipt underlines betrayal, leading Meredith to finally file for divorce, supported by her legal team.
  • “When I say burn it down to the ground, like, let the truth stand—I get how bad it was.” – Meredith [66:32]
• Meredith implements strict boundaries: refusing unsupervised visits, documenting every violation, and moving for supervised visitation and drug testing.

Systems Failures & Societal Gaslighting

• Social workers and others minimize risks, believe her ex’s manipulative narratives, and gaslight Meredith during the healing process.
  • “She goes, ‘Oh, he told me that you two hadn’t been intimate in months.’...How unprofessional is that to even say that?” – Meredith [70:32]

On Rage, Healing & Rebuilding

• Meredith explores the somatic roots of her rage and advocates for women to embrace anger as a healthy, necessary response.
  • “Moving that anger and being like, this is valid. This anger is telling you, it’s a guidepost, it’s a signal...I'll never stuff you down. You were trying to protect me.” – Meredith [94:38]
• She describes being obsessed with “the other woman,” being forced by necessity to create boundaries, and ultimately letting go of unhealthy fixations.

Aftermath: His Death & Complicated Grief

• Post-divorce, Meredith’s ex-husband overdoses—possibly intentionally.
  • “He overdosed and died this past...my son, the rage I have though...when my son cries over him, it is...pure torture.” – Meredith [88:36]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On It Happening to Anyone:
  "You are never stupid. It can happen to anyone, anyone.” – Molly [02:45]

• The Denial of Abuse:
  “I did not think it was abuse because I was still going for the mentality that, well, he hasn’t hit me or anything. I didn’t want the label...I’m a therapist.” – Meredith [30:19]

• Abuse & Control Escalates:
  “He started getting turned on by seeing her body on the screen...I got up and I climbed in the crib with my son and laid there.” – Meredith [24:01]

• Motherhood, Shame & Guilt:
  “I felt like it was my fault...so I would try to do certain things to try to make it better.” – Meredith [27:01]

• The Final Straw:
  “You go to detox and rehab or we're done…over my body with my kid. Because the driving home drunk was making me feel really uncomfortable.” – Meredith [40:43]

• On Anger as Healing:
  “My somatic therapist would make me...write a letter to your anger...and when I really sat with it...I said thank you. Like, I should have listened to you a long time ago. I’m never going to stuff you down...you were trying to protect me.” – Meredith [94:38]

• Grieving Post-Addiction:
  “I've mourned it so much before because I was like, that person died. He was like a zombie walking around without...his real—who he was.” – Meredith [91:06]

Important Timestamps

• Meeting & Background: [06:32–16:12]
• Addiction Takes Hold: [20:04–31:26]
• Substance Abuse & Abuse Escalation: [31:31–44:13]
• Intervention, Police, and Setting Boundaries: [44:13–56:20]
• Discovery of Infidelity & Identity Theft: [56:20–66:21]
• Plan B Revelation: [66:21–67:10]
• Divorce & Legal Process: [67:10–72:12]
• Confronting “The Other Woman”: [72:12–76:18]
• On Rage, Support Systems, and Healing: [79:09–97:01]
• Death of Ex-Husband & Complex Grief: [87:13–91:24]
• Final Reflections & Advice: [92:08–96:41]

Reflections & Advice

• Addiction is not the same as abuse:
  • “Addiction does not equal dogfish, liar, cheater, abuser; addiction is not the reason that he is who he is.” – Hannah [98:51]
• Find your tribe & document everything: Lean on friends and family, don't hesitate to document every violation or boundary breach, and trust your intuition.
• Embrace anger as a signal: Meredith and the hosts advocate for women, especially those in abusive or manipulative relationships, to move through anger rather than repress it.
  • “Support women's rage.” – Hannah [93:39]
• It can happen to anyone—even professionals.
  • “Why couldn't any of us see this? ...It can happen to anyone.” – Molly [98:51]

Meredith’s Resources

• Book: The Plan B Chronicles: Divorce, Defiance, Liberation
• YouTube: Mend with Mare
• Instagram & TikTok: @MendWithMare

Key Takeaways

• Abuse and manipulation can happen to anyone, regardless of background or expertise.
• Addiction complicates relationships but is not an excuse for abusive behavior.
• Children often sense more than we acknowledge.
• It’s critical to trust your instincts, document incidents, and leverage available support systems.
• Rage, grief, and healing are messy but necessary for liberation.

If you or someone you know is struggling with abuse or domestic violence, contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-6723 for help.

For Book Club:

• The Plan B Chronicles will be featured after current book pick; details via Patreon.

Listener Engagement:

• Share your stories or reflections with the show via social media or Spotify episode comments.

“Don’t betray yourself in the future. Trust your intuition.” – Meredith Beardmore / Hosts