← Determined Society with Shawn French | Adversity & Mindset
Determined Society with Shawn French | Adversity & Mindset
Divorce Didn’t Break Her, It Built Her
00:58:41
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- [00:01]
Heather Shepherd
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- [00:03]
Shawn French
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- [00:05]
Heather Shepherd
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- [00:07]
Shawn French
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Heather Shepherd
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- [00:23]
Shawn French
The one thing I remember you saying was now you are able to have a successful real estate career. Explain to the audience what that means because they're saying, well why couldn't she?
- [00:31]
Heather Shepherd
Before I was living in with somebody who was very controlling with money and would use things against me. Like what about our kids? Or what me? My kids are old enough, they're in school all day. Like that wasn't an issue at all.
- [00:45]
Shawn French
The mom guilt, throwing mom guilt on.
- [00:47]
Heather Shepherd
And you know, of course I was like oh my gosh, what about my kids? And as moms, our kids come first and we want to be the best we can be for them. But if you aren't fulfilled and happy and peaceful, then really it affects your kids, it affects your work, it affects everything in your life. You're not being selfish really, you're just taking care of yourself.
- [01:19]
Luck
This one luck. I let the pain inspire me I put my all in Everything I'm doing up until it's done, I meet for the entirety. I put it in overtime. I'll be working Just know I'm a go for mine cause I earned it. They watch and I know it's time confirmed it A whole society determined determin.
- [01:36]
Shawn French
What'S up everybody? Welcome back to another episode of the Determined Society. I'm your host Shawn French and before I introduce today's guest, please do me a favor. Hit subscribe on YouTube, Spotify and Apple and make yourself this promise that you're going to share this episode with someone that you know love and trust that needs to hear the message today. Once again, I always appreciate ratings, comments, whatever. I love to know what you love about the show. I love to know where we can get better too. So always here to hear your feedback. So today I have an amazing guest from Houston, Texas. Her name is Heather shepherd and she is an absolute badass. She's overcome so many things in her life. Recently she had a life altering event that happened, a divorce. She was married and it was not a pretty situation for her in a sense of dealing with a narcissist and she has broken free from those chains and she's out there killing it in motherhood. And in business. So without further ado, Heather shepherd, welcome to the show.
- [02:32]
Heather Shepherd
Thank you so much, Sean. I'm so happy to be here.
- [02:35]
Shawn French
I'm jacked you're here.
- [02:36]
Heather Shepherd
Thank you.
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Shawn French
I'm jacked you're here. You're an amazing human being. And so I just remember, you know, for the audience listening, it's. It's so funny how connections are made, right? You sent me a direct message, I don't know, a couple months ago, really? And it was just you. You know, it was so sincere and sweet, and I'm like, I gotta. I'm gonna respond.
- [02:54]
Heather Shepherd
Oh, thank you.
- [02:55]
Shawn French
I'm gonna respond to this. And, you know, it was just you were wanting to come onto the show, and the one thing that I really loved about your approach was it was kind, it was gentle, but also unapologetic of wanting to get your story out. Right. So you applied to be on the show, and here you are. So for the audience that doesn't know your whole story, why don't you start by telling a little bit about who you are, what you do, Then just briefly start going into the story of the reason why you're here today.
- [03:21]
Heather Shepherd
Okay, so I am a luxury real estate agent in Houston, Texas, and I have three kids, amazing kids, 14, 12 and 10. A girl and two boys.
- [03:33]
Shawn French
And your girl just won a district championship.
- [03:35]
Heather Shepherd
She did. For basketball.
- [03:37]
Shawn French
So badass.
- [03:38]
Heather Shepherd
So I'm so proud of her, and she loves it and works really hard. And so I live in Houston. I'm a native Houstonian. And about almost two years ago, I just decided I couldn't live the way I was living anymore. And I had to make a change for myself and for my children, and wasn't an easy decision. And as a mom, you know, like doing something like filing for divorce or making big changes, like, you know, you almost feel kind of like selfish. But, you know, it's for the best of everybody. But it just felt like I tried so hard to keep everything together, and then finally I was like, I can't do this anymore.
- [04:26]
Shawn French
This is interesting because. And I want. I want to take a pause real quick, and I want that. I want all moms and dads to listen. When you're going through making a decision, you know, for that's going to change the lives of not just yourself, but your children. There has to be the fair trade, right? Like, what's this going to cost me? But what's the reward? Right?
- [04:45]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [04:45]
Shawn French
So why don't you walk the audience through that pain? Because you talked about, you know, you Just couldn't live like that anymore. And in fact, you know, you told me at one point, like, I'm going to die if I keep living like this. So let's connect that with the audience and let them know the things that you were going through so that way they can understand your story more than hell. You could be a beacon of hope for them.
- [05:05]
Heather Shepherd
Yes, well, yes, definitely. Thank you. Just having somebody that wasn't around much, but when they were, just the meanness and the anger and violence and just, you know, after a while, I kept justifying it to myself, like, it's not that bad or like, he's not around much or, you know, but it just. One of my. Actually one of my best friends who is also a life coach, she told me, and I told you this on my form. She sent me something that said, can you imagine being in your late 80s, like, on your deathbed and looking back at your life and being like, oh, my gosh, did I live like that? Like, why didn't. Why wasn't I strong enough to make, like, a choice and change my life? And when she sent me that, I remember thinking, like, oh, my gosh, like, if I looked back on my life and this is how I was living and my kids were seeing, you know, especially my daughter, like, is this the example that I want to set for her and her future relationships? And I was like, no. You know, that was so powerful to me. And I remember, like, after a really bad night, I was driving home from carpool and I went straight to my attorney's office and I was like, I'm ready. Like, wow.
- [06:33]
Shawn French
Like that day, that day, you're like, I'm just done. It's funny you mentioned your daughter. But you know what I also find very interesting too, and my wife sent me this reel earlier today. It was like, as a. As a man, as a father, right? It is our job to lead in the household from the standpoint of the daughters, right? From the daughters of, like, daughters get their confidence from their father, and the little boys learn how to treat women from watching their dad. So it's not just about your daughter. It's about what was going on in that home that your sons were going to see then eventually, if they were around it enough, that's how they would treat women, Right?
- [07:13]
Heather Shepherd
That's a really.
- [07:14]
Shawn French
Isn't that powerful?
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Heather Shepherd
That is very powerful.
- [07:16]
Shawn French
That's some fucked up shit, isn't it?
- [07:18]
Heather Shepherd
That really is. Because I always, you know, my boys, like, you know, they're my boy. Like, I want them to Grow and be amazing husbands and amazing fathers and just treat. Respect women and treat women well. And so I think that's, yeah, damn, very powerful.
- [07:34]
Shawn French
Now, you mentioned violence. So it got physical at one point then, right?
- [07:39]
Heather Shepherd
Like a little, you know, nothing that wasn't. It was mostly like, just rage, like.
- [07:46]
Shawn French
Throwing shit, breaking shit.
- [07:47]
Heather Shepherd
Like, like violence.
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Shawn French
It's a form of intimidation, though, right? And it is a form of abuse.
- [07:51]
Heather Shepherd
It is.
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Shawn French
Sure is.
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Heather Shepherd
And when you're living it, though, like, you don't realize, like, you know, well, at least I didn't realize, like, oh, my gosh, like, this is something that he is using to, like, intimidate me and scare me and, you know, the way I was living, like, walking on eggshells and just kind of never being able to fully, like, relax. Like now my life is so peaceful. I was like, all I want is, like, peace. Like, I don't, you know, that just that feeling of not having to be, like, nervous or like, never knowing, like, what to expect in your own home.
- [08:30]
Shawn French
It's really hard. Like how, when you were going through those moments of walking on eggshells and just living in a constant state of fight or flight, how did you manage that?
- [08:39]
Heather Shepherd
Well, I always, like, I tried to be like. And I told, like, my word last year was consistency.
- [08:46]
Shawn French
Love it.
- [08:46]
Heather Shepherd
So I just, you know, I would. I got up every morning. I controlled the things that I could control, like my work, because I was now, like, now after I filed and everything, I was able to, you know, build my real estate career, which was like, my dream, like, to have this, like, empire of, like, in Houston. And so I would get up and I, you know, would work out too. My weights and soul cycle and classes and just having that routine and, like, that consistency. And no matter how I felt, just making sure, like, I was doing my best, doing these things, like taking my, like waking up my kids, taking them to school. Like, you know, the things that you can control, like, as a mom, no matter how you're feeling, like, just really staying consistent with those things that really helped me. And it just. That was what kept me, kept me going.
- [09:46]
Shawn French
That's incredible. Like, I want everybody listening. You know, whether you're a woman or a man, just. Just know that you living in your home and. And being worried about, you know, potentially what's going to happen next, right? Waiting for that next shoe to drop. It's not a way to live. Right? It's not a way to live. And you. And you can't thrive if you don't feel peace in your own Home. So I think the word peace is, is very applicable to many things we do outside the home, whether it's building a podcast, being a successful realtor, a great school teacher, or even a car salesman. Like, you have to have some peace in order to be fully functional out there in, in society and, and to be able to thrive. Right. The one thing I remember you saying was, you know, multiple times, but even just then and when you were speaking was, now you were able to have a successful real estate career. Explain to the audience what that means because they're saying, well, why couldn't she before?
- [10:44]
Heather Shepherd
Well, so before I was living in a. With somebody who was very controlling with, you know, money and everything I did and would use things against me. Like, oh, well, if you do that, like, what about our kids? Or what. I mean, my kids are old enough. They're in school all day. Like, that wasn't an issue at all.
- [11:07]
Shawn French
The mom guilt, throwing mom guilt on.
- [11:09]
Heather Shepherd
And, you know, of course I was like, oh my gosh, what about my kids? Like, if I need to pick them up from school or, you know, and I'm working like a bit, which really was all in my head. And as moms, you know, we want to be like, our kids come first and we want to be the best we can be for them. And so. But another thing is, like, if you don't feel like your cup up, if you aren't fulfilled and happy and peaceful, then really it affects your kids, it affects your work, affects everything in your life. And you're not being selfish, really, you're just taking care of yourself.
- [11:44]
Shawn French
And dude, it's just, it's funny because I think moms in general, and I think good dads, I don't think it's gender specific. No, I want to be very clear, right?
- [11:54]
Heather Shepherd
No, no.
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Shawn French
Because I deal with a lot of dad guilt. I do. I. I deal with a lot of dad guilt.
- [11:57]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [11:58]
Shawn French
And so, like, and so does my wife, right? Mom guilt. And yeah, clearly have mom guilt too. It's a real thing, you know, so parents listening is like, listen, as long as you are out there trying to better yourself so you can be whole for your family, don't feel guilty. Like, if the kid has to go to aftercare one day or somebody else has to pick the kid up, like, is it really going to be earth shattering? Now what would suck is like, if you just didn't plan for that and then you couldn't get to pick your kid up and they're sitting there at the, like, you know, makeup, like, where's mom, where's dad? Like that's mortifying. But like I just, the parent, the parental guilt, like I go through it a lot.
- [12:40]
Heather Shepherd
Yeah.
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Shawn French
Because my phone goes off. I mean we had breakfast together, you saw my phone going at apeshit the whole frickin time. Like. But there's some things that I do have to answer. So it's like walk the audience through how you deal with, you know, the parental guilt. Because like it's a real thing, but also is it necessary?
- [13:01]
Heather Shepherd
Right. So as a realtor, like my phone, like you like, because you know, real estate deals, it's like always like my phone phone's going off. And so how I deal with the mom guilt is I really try to spend like, you know, I've started trying to have dinner with my kids and just have like really meaningful like conversations and you know, it sounds like kind of like cliche but you know, just really enjoying the. Making the most of the time you have with your kids and doing things with them. Like. And you know, I tried to do the like one on one, like. But it's really hard with three kids. So I really just try to spend like quality time with them and really hear about their day and just instead of, you know, just kind of like, you know. And it's not the amount of time, it's more the quality of the time.
- [13:52]
Shawn French
I guess I'm with that, you know, because everybody talks about balance, right? If you talk about balance and I'm like eight hours at work, eight hours with my child, eight hours in the gym, eight hours reading, eight hours with God. Like you cannot do that. Really what we're, what we're searching for is how can you be present in those moments?
- [14:10]
Heather Shepherd
Right, right.
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Shawn French
So if it's, if like every Thursday night now. And it's Thursday, right?
- [14:15]
Heather Shepherd
Yes, yes, Thursday.
- [14:17]
Shawn French
So like for me, I know I get to go with a walk with my oldest daughter tonight. That's our thing. On Thursday nights we go, you go in the neighborhood, go for 15, 20 minutes. It's my time to connect with her.
- [14:30]
Heather Shepherd
Yeah.
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Shawn French
And last week when we did it was the first week. Right. Because I do, I do realize like she needs one on one. Yes, she needs me one on one.
- [14:37]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [14:38]
Shawn French
And so does my daughter. My, my six year old daughter. Right. My son, he can thrive at baseball, but sometimes he wants to mess around and play some PlayStation with that. Yeah, totally good. But, but, but you know, having that time, I, I left my phone in, in like the, there's this thing, the box that we have, we put our Phones in there and not enough. We don't do it enough. We need to put them, put them in there a lot more freaking often.
- [15:01]
Heather Shepherd
I love that idea.
- [15:02]
Shawn French
So I have my phone in there and I come back and my wife goes, hey, I text you. I'm like, yeah, I didn't take it. She goes, wow. Because I. Because that right there, that 15, 20 minutes, my daughter's not going to view that as 15, 20 minutes. She's going to view that as a highlight of her day.
- [15:18]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly.
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Shawn French
Because I was focused on her. I didn't have the stupid Apple watch, I didn't have my phone on me. It was just there being there with her, talking to her. Right? And so that's, that's great. Like, hey, listen, you know, sometimes you can't do one on one, right? But when you, when you do have that time with your children and it's family dynamics.
- [15:35]
Heather Shepherd
Right, Exactly.
- [15:36]
Shawn French
So if you're there by yourself and you have three kids, how can you do one on one with all three when you got.
- [15:39]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
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Shawn French
You got them all to yourself. Right. But it's, it's being present at dinner. Like, to me, dinner is non negotiable. Like, nah, we're sitting down. Like, no one's from the outside can penetrate these 40 minutes right here. Because I think one of the biggest things and then I'll, I'll let you go is let you talk is, you know, in, in society today. I don't think there's enough, I don't think there's enough focus and importance labeled on family dinners or family breakfast or who's sitting at the table anymore, right? No, that's all we do. Can I start? Nope. No, you're gonna, you're gonna wait until everybody gets there. So.
- [16:18]
Heather Shepherd
And that's something like we really didn't do before. And actually Jason, my wonderful boyfriend, he was like, this is something really important. And I was like, you are so right. Yeah, like just, you know, that little. Like, even if it's like 30 minutes or just connecting with them, letting them know, like, you're here for them and like, it's really powerful and you know, and even like my daughter, who's 14, like, we'll go to a workout class together and even though we're not like talking the whole time, it's just like being together. Like, I always talk to her on the way there and then on the way home and I mean, I probably drive her crazy, but, you know, but it's like one of those things. Yes. Like, I just want to talk to You. But just that time together is really special. Yeah, it just. And that's what they remember.
- [17:10]
Shawn French
Like, yeah, like, dude, like if you can be present with your kids and they know that you're fully there with them.
- [17:18]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
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Shawn French
They're going to give you that grace when you have to be.
- [17:20]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly right. That's so true. No, that really is.
- [17:25]
Shawn French
Yeah.
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Heather Shepherd
That time together and really like asking them questions and just being there for them.
- [17:33]
Shawn French
What's your favorite part about when they, when you ask them a question and they, you know kids, man, they just go, right, what is your fit? Give me one of your kids. Like one of the things that they do that you just like, oh my God, I'm so happy I asked this question. Now I get to hear you talk.
- [17:46]
Heather Shepherd
Oh my gosh. Well, my William, he is so funny. He said my boys go to an all boys. Well, and the stories that they have, like every time I ask him, like, how was your day? Like, especially on field trip days, they go on these really cool field trips like to parks and they go hiking and stuff. And he always has a hilarious story about his friends or somebody like jumped in the lake or somebody was in the mud or I always love like he will tell me these elaborate stories and my other two, I'll get like little like pieces of their day, but I won't get like these stories that William tells me. And you know, I'm always like, gosh, like thank you. Like I really. Because I always want to know about their days and I want to hear like about their friends and everything. And also when they have friends in the car, that's also another thing.
- [18:38]
Shawn French
Yeah, I just love like, because I'm like in my mind I'm thinking through like the whole movie here, right. The time when your ex husband was around than during the divorce and the fact there was a point where he was trying to take your kids completely. We'll get to that. Right, but. But now you have a good dude in your life who's stressing the importance of family dinners.
- [19:04]
Heather Shepherd
Yes, bro.
- [19:05]
Shawn French
That's fucking amazing.
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Heather Shepherd
I know.
- [19:08]
Shawn French
And that, and that shows your children now that this man is treating their mom with respect. And val. Not just that, but valuing them too. And I think that's, you know, really hard when you get into like blended families and things of that nature. So it's like, have you, have you just noticed them just opening up during dinner? Like, like obviously in stages, right? Yeah, because before, like if you weren't doing it before, now all of a sudden you're doing it's like, why are we doing this, Mom?
- [19:38]
Heather Shepherd
I know. And I get questions from them all the time. They're like, what are like, no. What are we doing? Like, no, like, put your phones down. Like, they're all sitting down together and they've started to really enjoy it and they've had. They have opened up more. And, you know, it's fun to have it actually having, like, you know, the blended. Like, his two kids are older. They're 19 and 23. And so. And then mine, you know, being younger, it's really a neat dynamic.
- [20:05]
Shawn French
He's back in it now. Yeah, he's back in it. He's got to raise kids anymore again, like, you ain't done, bro. You come back in here.
- [20:13]
Heather Shepherd
Thankfully, he loves kids like you, but just, you know, it really. They feel more comfortable and they know. They look forward to it.
- [20:22]
Shawn French
Yeah.
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Heather Shepherd
Which was something I wasn't expecting to happen.
- [20:26]
Shawn French
That's amazing because you broke a cycle.
- [20:28]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [20:29]
Shawn French
You know, every talks about cycles. Right. And like, if it. And then obviously there was a movie out there and it ends with me or ends with us or something like that.
- [20:36]
Heather Shepherd
Oh, yes.
- [20:37]
Shawn French
Like, we're. See about that Now I gotta bring that up with Blake Lively and Justin Baldani.
- [20:42]
Heather Shepherd
Oh, yeah.
- [20:43]
Shawn French
It's getting old. We're not going to touch on that. No, Maybe, maybe, maybe we will. I don't know. But, you know, it ends with us. And I think the big lesson there is, is, like, when. When. When I was treated a certain way as a kid, you know, or. Or anybody. Right. Like, we have to look at what that's going to do to the next generation.
- [21:04]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [21:05]
Shawn French
You know, so are we going to break generational curses? Are we going to add to them? So, like, you know, for you, you know, when you made that transition out of your marriage.
- [21:13]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [21:13]
Shawn French
Like, there was a point in that, in that decision making. And for me, too, because this is my second marriage.
- [21:19]
Heather Shepherd
Okay.
- [21:20]
Shawn French
So for me, you know, I don't talk about it enough. I probably should, so the audience understands more. But, you know, I'm not ready to. I'll talk about things that I'm ready and.
- [21:28]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [21:29]
Shawn French
I think me saying that this is my second marriage, the first time I've ever said it on air, you know, So I said to myself at one point, I'm like, am I the man that I want to be in this specific marriage right now? And the answer was no.
- [21:46]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [21:47]
Shawn French
And not placing blame on anybody. My ex wife and I are, like, really good friends now, and my wife and her are close. And I adore her. I love her to death. And the thing is, is, like, I'm not. Not just that I'm not the man I want to be, but what are my children going to learn from me? It has to end now. I have to cut it off now. And I have to go through the pain of the divorce and the timeshare. The timeshare, dude, come on. That's hard. But it was done for the betterment.
- [22:22]
Heather Shepherd
Of them long term, right? Exactly. That's so true. And that's like, oh, like, thinking about, like, one of the main reasons I was like, I'm gonna stay in this relationship because I don't want to not have my kids on Christmas morning, dude.
- [22:36]
Shawn French
Like, oh.
- [22:37]
Heather Shepherd
I'm like, that's.
- [22:38]
Shawn French
That's hard.
- [22:38]
Heather Shepherd
I like. But so this was the first year, this past year, and I basically pretended it wasn't Christmas. I told my whole family, like, it was like, we're gonna celebrate when I get them back. And we had a whole big Christmas, and I survived. It wasn't even, like, it was okay. And I, you know, it was just one of those things where it's part of it. But was it worth it? Yes. You have to be willing to push past, like, those thoughts of, like, I'm going to die if I don't have my kids on Christmas. No, you're going to be okay. Like, you might be sad and of course, like, miss them because, you know, it's a special morning. But, you know, they were so happy when I got them back. We had Christmas. All my family came over and they're excited.
- [23:26]
Shawn French
They get two Christmases.
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Heather Shepherd
I know. That's the thing. They're like, this is great. But, you know, like. Like, as a parent, you're just thinking like that because those are so many special memories that, you know, getting everything ready for Christmas and Santa and, like.
- [23:41]
Shawn French
Oh, you know, it makes it different. It makes it different. But, like, I can really relate. I can sympathize with that.
- [23:48]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [23:48]
Shawn French
Like, no one really. No one really understands what divorcees are going through when there's kids involved unless they've been through it themselves.
- [23:58]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [23:58]
Shawn French
It is, like, due to a point where I'm like, yeah, no, I can't ever not be in this marriage because there's no way I cannot be with my son. Right. Like, there's no way I can be with my dog. Like, whoa. Like, now, though, you know, we're, you know, it's equal amount of time, and it's like. And there's. There's people. I know there's People watching right now, like, no, you know, marriage, you know, you. You don't get divorced. You stick it out. Those kids are suffering. You know what the you're talking about? It's an ideology.
- [24:27]
Heather Shepherd
Yeah.
- [24:27]
Shawn French
Right. And I think it. That that ideology to me is like, okay, well, my children can grow up in this home, that it's contentious and then grow to hate both their parents and then have messed up relationships on their own. Or I can break the cycle.
- [24:42]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly.
- [24:43]
Shawn French
That's what I did.
- [24:44]
Heather Shepherd
See, you. I mean, you get it. Like, you. But it's scary, definitely going through it, and it's just horrible. It's so upsetting. It's so stressful and just. But on the other side, looking back, like, I have told some friends who are thinking, they're like, oh, it's not that bad, like, should I. And I'm like, no. Like, I can tell you from my experience, like, just take like trusting yourself and believing in yourself. Like, that was something that was hard for me at first because I didn't have this big career and I wasn't able to, you know, do a lot of the things before that I am able to do now.
- [25:25]
Shawn French
Yeah.
- [25:25]
Heather Shepherd
And just believing in yourself, like, you're stronger than you really think, like, deep down. And when it comes, you know, comes to everything, like, you will be okay.
- [25:37]
Shawn French
See, I like what you just said there, that you. That you didn't have this career before, that you have now. Walk the audience through that, right? Because this conversation's flying by and it's amazing and there's a bunch of descriptors in there of how, you know, dark and contentious it may have been. Let's talk about the things that came out of it. Right? So now your career, you're like one of the top luxury real estate agents in Houston, Texas. How has the freeing of that energy helped you grow your career?
- [26:10]
Heather Shepherd
Oh, gosh, it's been like night and day. Just when you're happy and at peace, it just. Everything falls into place. Like now I'm able to not have the stresses that I had before. And you know, when you have somebody not being nice to you, like, a lot, it really wears on you and you start to think, oh my gosh, like, maybe I. Maybe I can't do this, like, maybe. But then, like, getting that self worth back and just feeling like, unstoppable. Yeah, it's one. It just makes all of the difference.
- [26:47]
Shawn French
But you did the work to get that self worth back. Right. Like, explain that to the audience because it's like a lot of People say, like, hey, you know, don't put your self worth in another person. That's not what you were doing. No, that's not what you were doing. How did you get that back yourself?
- [27:01]
Heather Shepherd
You know, just little by little, like, you know, my whole thing about being consistent, like, just, you know, working out, you know, reaching out to people, letting everybody know what I'm doing. Like growing my Instagram, like, I went from 300 followers like two and a half years ago to over 14,000.
- [27:23]
Shawn French
You know, it's insane.
- [27:24]
Heather Shepherd
Just by being like, posting every day, like, making sure, like I had just something out there to kind of show what I was doing and that I'm really, I know what I'm doing and I'm providing like, value to value, you know, to my clients. And I'm gonna do everything I can and work as hard as I can to make sure, you know, they have the best experience with me and they. We find the house of their dreams. So it's, it's really rewarding, like, and so that's really just little by little, how I rebuilt my life.
- [28:02]
Shawn French
I love it. It's so funny because I'm sitting here looking up at the, like the ceiling and smiling because when you go through like that, that's the heavy lift like that, that is like when you are feeling emotionally, that is when you're feeling in your soul, your body hurts, it almost hurts physically to make that next good decision of waking up in the morning eating the right food. No, you just want the pizza. No, you want to lay there and be a bum. You want to feel fucking sorry for yourself. You want to be depressed because that's how you're feeling currently. But when you work through those.
- [28:35]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [28:35]
Shawn French
And you come out, you come out strong, you know, like, that's it. That's what you've done. Right? So now anything that you have to deal with, contractual issues, buyer issues, sellers, how easy is that to deal with now?
- [28:48]
Heather Shepherd
So easy. I mean, it really. And it, you know, going through something hard, no matter what you're going through, like, it really empowers you when you're on the other side. And my kids, like, seeing, you know, what I went through and then now, like how successful I am and how happy I am, it really, like, they're proud of me. And I think that's, you know, I'm being a good role model to them, so. And really how, you know, like your word, balancing everything, like my career and then them. And I always want to be at their spirit sports games and, you know, it's really. It's definitely a balance. But I think overall, I'm just being a really good role model for them. And I want them to grow up and know that they can do anything they put their minds to. You just have, you know, with hard work and believing in yourself and. Because it's true, like, it just. When you have that, like, you will achieve great things. Things.
- [29:54]
Shawn French
I think it's one thing to say it, right? To tell a kid, you can be anything you want to be, you can do this, you can do that. So all you parents out there, you're telling your kids they can be or do anything or have anything they want, be, do, have the. Are you doing, Right? Like, because if you're not doing it, then they are not going to follow you. I'm looking right at you because I've been there. Yeah, Like, I've been there. Like, I cannot talk about discipline and determination when my body was a fat, fluffy mess. I can't, because I wasn't controlling in that one area.
- [30:27]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [30:27]
Shawn French
But now that I do control the one area and things are starting to grow professionally now, everything comes together and now your kids are saying, wow, I could do that. So you either say to your kids, right, you can do this. You can be or have anything you want, or you can show them how the hell to do it.
- [30:44]
Heather Shepherd
That is so powerful. That's so true. Really, doing it yourself is the best way to show them.
- [30:51]
Shawn French
But you're doing that, like, that's the thing that I want you to understand. Right. You know I'm saying, like, that. Yes, that's the point. Like, you know. Yes. You know, you're out of this marriage, you're out of, like, all this other shit. But what you're really showing your daughter and your two sons is like, mom could fucking rock it, and mom can rock it, and she can smile and keep her chest up and her head up through all this stuff. Like, dude, why can't I? So, like, there's going to be. There was moments, I'm going to tell you right here, because the audience that doesn't know her daughter's a freshman and was on varsity basketball and they won a district championship. There was times during that year that she just won the district championship that she wanted to give up. I'm going to tell you right now, because that's the way things are, especially as a young adolescent. And there was something whispering to her not to. And it probably was the fact that she saw you persevere out of that situation.
- [31:40]
Heather Shepherd
Thank you. I hope so. And I, I really, she has a really amazing drive and I'm really trying hard to lead by example and just.
- [31:51]
Shawn French
Tell me about her drive. What does it look like?
- [31:54]
Heather Shepherd
Well, just, she's very focused and that's something that I try to be with everything in my life, like my workouts, my work, just you know, doing what she needs to do and not like over complicating it and just really trying to be the best she can be.
- [32:17]
Shawn French
I see her, you know, that's learned behavior. It's learned behavior. You know, it's funny because you know I'm listening to you, but I'm also watching every move. Like that's the one thing that people don't understand because I'm very incognito about it. Like I see what you did when you got here, right, because you posted it. I saw what you did this morning because you posted it. You were up, you were at the gym, you got a quick one in. Like you're living it, right? So you can say it with your chest, right? Like right, you're living out loud. And I, and, and those are the things that kids pick up on. Says I always think and I, you know, I don't know who coin this phrase. I didn't. But I use it because I love it. And if I remembered who said it, I would quote you. I'm sorry if you're listening and I don't know it but like yeah, the best lessons aren't taught, they're caught.
- [33:11]
Heather Shepherd
Oh, wow.
- [33:12]
Shawn French
So everything that your child sees you doing is teaching more of a lesson than you telling them something.
- [33:18]
Heather Shepherd
That's a great quote.
- [33:20]
Shawn French
Right? So yes, you know, what are my kids watching me do? They wake up in the morning, what am I doing? I'm drenched in sweat, making their breakfast. So what's your move? What's your move when you're older? Like what are you going to do? You know, like that, that's, that to me is showing them something and they're catching lessons. You ever thought of it like that?
- [33:42]
Heather Shepherd
No, I have never thought about it like that.
- [33:45]
Shawn French
Crazy is.
- [33:46]
Heather Shepherd
That is crazy to think about.
- [33:48]
Shawn French
It's powerful.
- [33:49]
Heather Shepherd
It is. No, it's very powerful. And I, I always like think about like my, you know, just I want to be the best I can be for, you know. Now I've really tried to make sure that for myself that I'm you know, like the healthiest and hard working and there for them. But I never thought about it. Like it's really, they're copying me and.
- [34:11]
Shawn French
They'Re, it's everything you're doing? They're watching. They, they are watching. That is, you may not know it, but they are stalking your ass and they're, they're finding the holes. Right. Because this is what the kids do, especially the 14 year old.
- [34:24]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [34:25]
Shawn French
Okay. And then your 12 year old, maybe not your 10 year old yet, but you're 14 and 12 year old are trying to find the chink in your armor, where are the holes? So I can exploit them when I'm in trouble and throw it back. And if you don't have them, if you don't show them, they can. Right. But if you just display determination, grit, resiliency.
- [34:45]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [34:46]
Shawn French
Like that's what they're going to learn. So what they, what they find is they start looking for your holes but only find all the light.
- [34:53]
Heather Shepherd
That's true.
- [34:54]
Shawn French
And then they gravitate to that and then that becomes them.
- [34:58]
Heather Shepherd
And I try to be like, like just a positive, like, you know, the light within, you know, I try to be like that because I don't want them to when they think about like me. And I want them to know that like I'm going to always like be there for them and have something like encouraging to say, like no matter what they've done, I always tell them like if you come to me and tell me the truth, like in their great kids, but I'm thinking like as they get older, like if you come to me and tell me the truth, you're not going to be in trouble. Like I'm here for you and I want to make sure we have that relationship where, you know, later on if they're in trouble or something's going on, that they can come to me and know, like I'm here for them.
- [35:41]
Shawn French
And that's how you keep them from getting behind the wheel drunk.
- [35:45]
Heather Shepherd
Oh gosh, yes. Right, exactly.
- [35:48]
Shawn French
So like I, it's funny because my wife and I talk about this all the time is, and we tell this to our, you know, to Bobby, who's right. 11. It's like, hey, look, as you get older, you're going to be, you know, things are going to be in your face. Like you're going to be out potentially at a party. If something goes on, I need you to be comfortable enough to call me.
- [36:09]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [36:10]
Shawn French
And we're not going to yell at you no matter what you did, but we're going to have a conversation. Not that night, but in the morning. But I'd rather you make it home alive.
- [36:18]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly.
- [36:19]
Shawn French
Like that's heavy. Right. So it's like, but. But in these formative years, 14, 12 and 10, displaying rationale, like, rational behavior when you hear something from them, like, if you never overreact to something, okay. And then you can be that calming voice and. And be their peace so they feel they can be honest with you. Like, that's where that real relationship comes from.
- [36:42]
Heather Shepherd
I agree with you on that. And them not being scared that they're going to get in trouble or scared that, you know, I'm going to, like, yell at them or be like, crazy to them, like, just having that relationship is. And I try to build that, like, every day, just really. And they know I'm there for them. Like, they're, you know, whenever. Something like, if they need me to talk to a teacher or parent, teacher conference or something, like, I'm always there for them. Just through everything.
- [37:11]
Shawn French
Yeah, that's good.
- [37:12]
Heather Shepherd
I try my very best. Like we all do as parents.
- [37:15]
Shawn French
It's hard though, man.
- [37:16]
Heather Shepherd
It's hard. It is hard. Yeah, it's hard.
- [37:18]
Shawn French
There's life going on. Right?
- [37:20]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [37:20]
Shawn French
There's life going on constant, constantly.
- [37:22]
Heather Shepherd
And with more than, like, with three kids, like, it's all in close together, too. Both of our.
- [37:27]
Shawn French
Oh, yeah.
- [37:28]
Heather Shepherd
But yours and minor, like, two years apart.
- [37:30]
Shawn French
Two. Two years apart. It's like bang, bang, bang, you know?
- [37:33]
Heather Shepherd
So.
- [37:34]
Shawn French
Yeah, it's nuts.
- [37:36]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [37:37]
Shawn French
So, okay, so let's start tying in the career now. Walk me, walk me in the audience through what having a successful real estate business means to you at this point in your life. Because it's not just about the money.
- [37:52]
Heather Shepherd
No, it just. What it means to me is that I have shown myself, like, I can support myself. I can. I can do this. Like, I can take care of myself, like, in my life and my kids. And having, you know, just money be something that was used to as control, which I think, you know, talking to friends, like, a lot of women are going through things, and I'm sure men too, just with, you know, their partner controlling money, holding it over their heads, like, you know, all. There's all sorts of way for money to be controlled. But now that I have my career and my business and it's growing and growing, it's like, I can do this.
- [38:39]
Shawn French
Yeah.
- [38:39]
Heather Shepherd
Like, I pay for my own life. And it's just. It's so rewarding. And like, it's the mental feeling that like. Like, I'm not scared anymore.
- [38:50]
Shawn French
Dude. How powerful, right?
- [38:52]
Heather Shepherd
I'm just. I'm like, I got this.
- [38:54]
Shawn French
Yeah. My mom went through the same thing.
- [38:56]
Heather Shepherd
She did.
- [38:57]
Shawn French
She did, man. So, you know, she, you know, she's had multiple marriages, but the. My dad is in my biological. He's my dad.
- [39:07]
Heather Shepherd
Huh.
- [39:08]
Shawn French
They. They ended up getting divorced. And before that, she had never been able to live on her own. Never had to. And she's killing it. She bought her own home. You know, she's gone through two, you know, hip replacement surgeries, two knee replacement surgeries. And this woman, you know, her perspective. I love you, mom, but your perspective sometimes is up. Right. She still has that poor me type mentality at times, just being honest.
- [39:36]
Heather Shepherd
Uhhuh.
- [39:37]
Shawn French
But she fights through it. She's a fighter. She's determined. Right. So it's like for you, when you're sitting there saying, like, I can support myself, I can support my own life, I can support my kids, I can do this. There's. There's audience, people right now listening that don't understand that they. They don't understand what you said because they think, well, why wouldn't you be able to explain to them, like, enlighten them, because they need to understand what you went through and what this actually means.
- [40:06]
Heather Shepherd
Well, it just. It was really. Everything was taken care of. Like, you know, I would take care of our children, which I am so grateful that I was able to do. Like, be home with them and take care of them and. But every year, like, I would. Whenever I would need to renew my real estate license, it was always like, you don't need to do that. Like, you don't. You don't need that. We have kids. Like, you don't. You don't need that. I'm not paying for that. Like, you know, things like that. And it was like five or six hundred dollars. And, you know, he had a really great, like, very successful career. But it was. Anything that had to do with me bettering myself, it was just. It caused so many issues because it.
- [40:53]
Shawn French
Was never about you bettering yourself. It was about you being able to stand on your own two feet.
- [40:57]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [40:57]
Shawn French
And not need him.
- [40:58]
Heather Shepherd
And when you're in that mindset, though, you don't realize, like, that's what's going on. Like, because I would. Again, I would say, oh, gosh, like, I do have three kids. Like, oh, you know, it's like. But using that, and it makes you crazy. And I'm sure people can relate to this. Like, you don't really. When you're in it, you're like, oh, gosh, well, everything's taken care of. Like, I don't have to pay for my own health insurance, car insurance, you know, like, my kids like, how. How am I going to feed them and all these things. And so it's like staying stuck in a life that is not where you want to be, but it's safe. Because, I mean, safe as in, like, you have a house, you have, you.
- [41:39]
Shawn French
Know, your bills are paid.
- [41:40]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [41:40]
Shawn French
Health insurance, food on the table. Right.
- [41:43]
Heather Shepherd
But it's. But you don't have that freedom to, like, make choices for yourself. And I really feel like being able to choose is so free. Like, it's just. It's one of those things where, like, you know, and my Jason, so wonderful, he's so supportive of my career. Like, when I told him I was coming on here, he was like, you go, like, that's cool, man.
- [42:08]
Shawn French
But, like, I wish she could have came.
- [42:10]
Heather Shepherd
I know, Me too. Me too. But just having that free, like, just being able to choose, like, what I want for my life that I know is going to benefit my kids. My, you know, just. It's like that freedom to chew.
- [42:26]
Shawn French
That's so awesome.
- [42:27]
Heather Shepherd
And feeling that you're not going to have anybody be upset with you about it.
- [42:32]
Shawn French
Such a simplistic thing. Right? Isn't that weird? Like, this whole thing brought out the freedom to choose, right. That you get the choice to live what life you want to live and to provide for your family, your children. It's wild, isn't that? Right? No, like, truly, because, like, if. If nobody's gone through what you've gone through, they don't get it. But now I think they have a little bit of an idea, like, that you get to choose now. Right. With. Without consequence.
- [43:01]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [43:02]
Shawn French
The only consequence is a positive one. Right. Your children get to see this, and then your boyfriend gets to fall in love with that over and over and over again every day. That is a powerful situation.
- [43:16]
Heather Shepherd
Damn. Yes.
- [43:18]
Shawn French
And you're an avid worker outer, too. You love Soul Cycle.
- [43:20]
Heather Shepherd
I do.
- [43:21]
Shawn French
Yeah. You love your weights.
- [43:22]
Heather Shepherd
I do.
- [43:23]
Shawn French
So you pour into yourself, like, multiple areas. That's my point. Right. It's like you. You go to your soul cycle, and then you also have a personal trainer that you, you know, go lift weights with twice a week. So you're consistently pouring back into yourself. How freeing was that?
- [43:40]
Heather Shepherd
It is. It is like a feeling like no other. Like, just. It's so freeing.
- [43:46]
Shawn French
You don't have to ask permission.
- [43:47]
Heather Shepherd
Right. Like, it is. It's one of those things where you don't know how good it's going to feel until you're actually living it. And it's just empowering and just knowing that I'm Going to keep getting, like, better and better. I'm going to grow my business. I'm going to, you know, I always am, like, trying to be a better mom. And just with my whole life before, my whole entire focus was like, I was worried about my kids. I was, you know, it was just one of those things in my mind. I was like, oh, gosh, I can't do this for myself because what about my kids? But really, it's not being selfish. Again, back to that. Like, it was you as a parent, you have to do things for yourself if you're gonna be able to give.
- [44:34]
Shawn French
Well, you were stuck in a place of lacking, right now you're in a place of growth. You're in a place of yes, yes, yes, I can do that. Right, right. I think that's important because that's when you're truly living.
- [44:45]
Heather Shepherd
Oh, gosh, yes. Right, yes. And just loving the life that you're like you're living. And like, I'm 42 and you know, I used to think like, oh my gosh, like, once my kids grow up, like, what am I going to do? Like, oh gosh. And now I'm like, this is so exciting. Like, I love my life. Like, I have so many things to look Forward to.
- [45:09]
Shawn French
The 40s are still young, man. I mean, we're still spring chickens.
- [45:13]
Heather Shepherd
I think so too.
- [45:15]
Shawn French
I'm just figuring out who I am.
- [45:16]
Heather Shepherd
Right?
- [45:17]
Shawn French
Yeah.
- [45:18]
Heather Shepherd
But a lot of people, especially like women, I think, feel like as you get older, like you are stuck or you can't change your life just from talking to different friends or like, well, how did you do it at your age? And like, I. I'm not that old, first of all.
- [45:35]
Shawn French
Not at all.
- [45:36]
Heather Shepherd
And second of all, like, you can change your life at any point in time.
- [45:41]
Shawn French
Yeah.
- [45:41]
Heather Shepherd
There's no like, rule where like, if you're over this age, like, it's too late. It's never too late.
- [45:47]
Shawn French
I remember when I was a kid thinking like 42 was old.
- [45:50]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [45:51]
Shawn French
And so that. But that's when the first ever the determined society was recorded when I was 42 years old.
- [45:57]
Heather Shepherd
See?
- [45:58]
Shawn French
And this. So I'm 46 now. This month thing is maybe tomorrow. Wait. Or the 27th, I'd have to look at that is the four year anniversary of the show.
- [46:09]
Heather Shepherd
Congratulations.
- [46:10]
Shawn French
Wild, isn't it?
- [46:11]
Heather Shepherd
It is wild.
- [46:12]
Shawn French
But that was a pivot I did at 42. And it wasn't the only thing I did now recently. Now this is the only thing I do. Right. But. But before that it was like, you know, I was a baseball coach and a teacher. I was a sales rep. And now I'm doing. Now I'm shifting to this. But it was a hard pull. It was like something inside me was just like. Like, trying to come out. And I was like, okay, I gotta explore this. I gotta figure out what it is. I'm probably gonna suck. No one's gonna listen. Right. That was, like, one of the first. The first episode was like, if you're listening. Thank you. I don't know who's gonna listen. And the vision for the show was so small, but as things continue and the consistency happens.
- [46:54]
Heather Shepherd
Yes.
- [46:54]
Shawn French
And there were some breaks in between. Right. Because it was. There was frustration, there was depression, there was, you know, anxiety. There was a lot of different things happened in the last four years that I finally got a hold on over the last year and a half. And then ever since then, it's been like, light speed ahead.
- [47:11]
Heather Shepherd
Yeah.
- [47:11]
Shawn French
Right. But. But again, at 42, I made that move. I chose differently. And I lost a lot of people along the way.
- [47:19]
Heather Shepherd
Oh, you know. Yes.
- [47:20]
Shawn French
Everybody thinks it's cool until it's serious. Right. Everything is cool. Oh, that's cute. Yeah.
- [47:25]
Heather Shepherd
Yeah.
- [47:26]
Shawn French
You can speak here. You can do that. But then when all the attention comes, like, whoa, wait a second. You can't be a part of XYZ anymore because your focus is here. Right. I. I fully intended to continue with my sales career and do this right. But what I found out is corporate America don't like that. They don't like it. They don't like it because of what you may say. They. It may represent them. So now I'm just my own dude. Yeah, I'm just my own dude now.
- [47:52]
Heather Shepherd
But you're happy and so happy.
- [47:54]
Shawn French
So happy. It's. It's. At times, it's still hard. It's still hard sometimes, you know, it's stressful. But I would rather have that and know that I can fully control what I do then, you know, have my. Have my life sitting in somebody else's hands.
- [48:08]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly.
- [48:09]
Shawn French
But you can surely attest to that yourself because that's what you've done with your life.
- [48:13]
Heather Shepherd
Yes, definitely.
- [48:14]
Shawn French
Damn. Damn, damn. What do you love most about real estate?
- [48:20]
Heather Shepherd
All the people that I get to help, all of my clients and just. It's so rewarding. And I love to look at beautiful houses and that shit's cool. It's so much fun. And just seeing, you know, seeing my clients who, like, 99% of the time become, like, very close friends of mine if they weren't Already.
- [48:42]
Shawn French
But I'm not surprised.
- [48:45]
Heather Shepherd
But that I really just love seeing them settled in their new homes and selling, you know, like settled in their new homes and also me being able to help them sell their current home, like for the most possible. Like I work with a great staging company and photographer and mortgage broker. And so I have my whole team of like wonderful people that I know are going to do their best and take care of my clients the way that I do. And it's just. It's a great feeling.
- [49:16]
Shawn French
It's so funny because, like the first thing you said was watching your clients get settled in their new home. How much of that is a personal one for you because of what you went through? You like seeing it in other people. You gotta go deeper more often on yourself, man.
- [49:31]
Heather Shepherd
I've never.
- [49:32]
Shawn French
Think about that like that. Think about it. So you're reliving your wins through these other people. And that is a great way. That is a great way to live, you know, through other people. Right.
- [49:43]
Heather Shepherd
Wow.
- [49:44]
Shawn French
That's a nice vicarious win. That is because it reminds you of what you've done and now you're giving it to other people. That's a gift. That's a gift, dude. I'm getting good sponsors.
- [49:54]
Heather Shepherd
That is. I know.
- [49:55]
Shawn French
Me too.
- [49:55]
Heather Shepherd
That is so. That is powerful. I've never thought about it like that.
- [50:00]
Shawn French
Most people love selling the house because they can provide financially for their families. And yeah, they get the cool photo op with the people. Neat. You know this will help you sell the next house.
- [50:10]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [50:10]
Shawn French
But you're. But you're. It's different for you on a. On a. On a. On a physical level, you're feeling it differently.
- [50:19]
Heather Shepherd
I am. That's.
- [50:22]
Shawn French
But you don't realize it until I bring it up. So now next time it happens and when you see somebody, like, physiologically you're going to feel that feeling. And that is why you're having so many great things come to you. Because your mind doesn't know whether it's happening to somebody else or happening to you. Has no clue. It can't judge.
- [50:42]
Heather Shepherd
Unbelievable.
- [50:43]
Shawn French
That point, less visualization. Right. So if you think about visualization and you visualize selling a house. Yeah. But if you visualize the feeling that you have when you're selling the house and seeing the people and feeling that emotional state, your. Your brain doesn't know that that's a simulation, has no idea. So it. So it's real and so that you vibrate on a certain level. And then that's what comes to you because there's no other way. Because that's the only thing you're looking for.
- [51:12]
Heather Shepherd
Yeah, that's true.
- [51:13]
Shawn French
You're doing a lot of cool, man.
- [51:15]
Heather Shepherd
Thank you. Yeah, thank you.
- [51:18]
Shawn French
It's big.
- [51:19]
Heather Shepherd
Just really happy.
- [51:21]
Shawn French
I can tell you walked into first watch and you were lit up. I'm like, damn, I better get on my game because she's. She's coming in here like a spark plug.
- [51:28]
Heather Shepherd
It's like a list of things I want to ask you.
- [51:31]
Shawn French
You don't forget after the show. You still gotta ask me those, all these things. So as we land the plane here. 2024 was about consistency for you. What is 2025 about?
- [51:44]
Heather Shepherd
It's about growth.
- [51:46]
Shawn French
Okay.
- [51:46]
Heather Shepherd
That's with my business. And about like my word was hustling like growth and hustle. Like really just I have hit the ground like running like with 2025, I want to have record sales. But it's not even about that. Like I just have, you know, certain like friends that I'm still helping find houses that I really, you know, it's because in Houston the inventory is still low with houses. And so I've really been working hard on like I'll drop off little gifts. I had these custom candles made with my logo and wine stoppers. And so I've dropping off like gifts, like asking, you know, homeowners if they want to sell their houses and you know, just to see if it fits for a client. Like I'm. And then I'll call them and just, you know, ask them if they want to sell.
- [52:41]
Luck
No.
- [52:42]
Heather Shepherd
And people love my little gift and you know, if they ever want to sell, they know to reach out to me and. But that's the hustle, like you really like taking the time.
- [52:51]
Shawn French
That's a door to door solar panel sales chip. Right.
- [52:55]
Heather Shepherd
I don't do or not get. Yeah.
- [52:57]
Shawn French
But even if you did it before, whatever.
- [52:59]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [52:59]
Shawn French
You know, the point is, is you're out there doing it, right?
- [53:01]
Heather Shepherd
Yeah.
- [53:01]
Shawn French
You can't expect growth and not do uncomfortable things.
- [53:04]
Heather Shepherd
Right, Exactly. Because it does take time. But I really just, you know, growing and being the best realtor I can be to my clients. Even if it takes like trying to find off market or you know, just different things that would help them.
- [53:21]
Shawn French
Yeah.
- [53:21]
Heather Shepherd
So I'm really going the extra mile and just trying to really grow.
- [53:27]
Shawn French
That's really cool.
- [53:28]
Heather Shepherd
Thank you.
- [53:29]
Shawn French
That's really awesome. I love that word growth. You know, I love the fact that you have something tied to it though. Right. Because some people say, yeah, I want to sell x many houses, right. Well, you know. Well, how are you going to get there? What are your KPIs, how many doors you have to knock on? How many calls you have to make? How many, how many listing appointments you need? How many buyer meetings you need? How many houses you have to show? I go on and on and on and on. Yes, but, but I think the big thing is, is like when you, when you have a set plan, like this is what growth looks like to me this year, then it's attainable. Right? And as long as we stay disciplined in our own life. Your morning routine, whatever. Like the morning routine we were talking about, it's like, morning routine's cool. Like, there's a lot of, you know, Igers out there. Like, oh, my morning routine? You know, I. I walk for 45 minutes, then I breathe for another 30 minutes, then I have a walk with my wife and we have 17 cups of coffee. And by one I start working. And I made $9 million last month, right?
- [54:23]
Heather Shepherd
Fuck off.
- [54:24]
Shawn French
Like, shut the fuck up. You're lying. Okay, really, what, what the morning routine does is just get you to keep your word to yourself.
- [54:31]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly.
- [54:32]
Shawn French
So I don't care what your morning routine is like. You know, there's a lot. I wake up at 4 and I'm in the gym by 4:30. Not because I want to or I think I have to. It's just like in my schedule with everything I have going on with the three children, wanting to spend time with my wife.
- [54:46]
Heather Shepherd
Right.
- [54:47]
Shawn French
And my kids, extracurriculars. My son has baseball, my girls have gymnastics. Like, it's the only time I could do it.
- [54:52]
Heather Shepherd
Yes, Right.
- [54:53]
Shawn French
So my morning routine is about executing things that I say I'm going to do. And so if, if someone else's is I need to wake up at seven and I need to read 15 pages then, then that's what you do. That's your morning routine.
- [55:06]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly.
- [55:06]
Shawn French
Doesn't be groundbreaking. It just has to be like something that you said you were going to do and you stick to it, you do it. And so I think that's like an important lesson. So as we wrap up, the one question I have for you. Obviously this is the determined society. What does determination mean to you and how have you applied it to your last two years?
- [55:25]
Heather Shepherd
Okay, so determination means to me, making a choice and following through with it the best possible way I can. Like not going, like, believing in myself and not going back on a choice that I've made.
- [55:45]
Shawn French
Love it.
- [55:46]
Heather Shepherd
And I have, really, the past two years, I have. I made a choice and Even though it was, you know, scary, like sad, you know, different. I had different emotions. I kept going and I was determined to get to the other side. I was determined to have my house, have my kids, like, all these things, and just. That's what it really means to me, not giving up.
- [56:13]
Shawn French
Yeah. It's so funny because I look at, you know, motivation, I look at determination, and then I. And I like to. I like to think of this as like, it's doing what you say you're gonna do long after the emotion wears off.
- [56:24]
Heather Shepherd
Exactly.
- [56:25]
Shawn French
That's it.
- [56:26]
Heather Shepherd
That's.
- [56:26]
Shawn French
It's easy to get excited about getting in shape. It's easy to get excited about being a top luxury realtor. It's easy to get excited about having a top 10, you know, podcast. It's easy to get excited about it. What happened when that emotion wears off? What are you going to do? So thank you so much for coming on today.
- [56:39]
Heather Shepherd
Thank you for having me.
- [56:40]
Shawn French
Absolutely. Coming all this way. The show was. This episode was awesome.
- [56:44]
Heather Shepherd
Thank you.
- [56:44]
Shawn French
You did so good. I appreciate you.
- [56:46]
Heather Shepherd
Really enjoying it.
- [56:47]
Shawn French
Give everybody where they can find you on Instagram or your website.
- [56:50]
Heather Shepherd
So, yes, Instagram. HS Homes Houston. Follow me and send me a message and I'll follow you back.
- [56:58]
Shawn French
Yes.
- [56:58]
Heather Shepherd
So thank you.
- [57:00]
Shawn French
What's your website?
- [57:02]
Heather Shepherd
Hshomeshouston.com.
- [57:04]
Shawn French
There you have it, ladies and gentlemen. Thank you so much for listening and watching on YouTube or Spotify. Please don't forget to send this episode to somebody that, you know, would get a bunch out of it, but hit the like button, Hit the subscribe, leave a review. Until next time, stay determined.
- [57:23]
Luck
Shout French. What up? This one Luck. I let the pain inspire me. I put my all in. Everything I'm doing up until it's done, I mean, for the entirety, I put in overtime. I'll be working. Just know I'm a go for mine. Cause I earned it. They watch and I know it's time I confirmed it. A whole society determined.