How Jo Weatherford Rewired Her Brain After Trauma and Addiction

Summary

Summary of "How Joe Weatherford Rewired His Brain After Trauma and Addiction"

Podcast: The Determined Society with Shawn French
Host: Shawn French
Guest: Joe Weatherford
Release Date: May 16, 2025

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Introduction

In this poignant episode of The Determined Society Podcast, host Shawn French engages in a deeply personal and transformative conversation with Joe Weatherford, an expat, TEDx speaker, and former Playboy model. Joe's journey from childhood trauma and addiction to becoming a counseling professor and martial arts instructor offers invaluable insights into personal development, resilience, and the power of rewiring one's brain.

Early Life and Trauma

Joe Weatherford's story begins with a harrowing childhood experience that set the foundation for his later struggles. At the tender age of four, Joe was molested, an event that he initially repressed. This traumatic experience led him to develop harmful beliefs about his self-worth and connections with others.

Joe Weatherford [07:25]: "As a child, what I did with it is I repressed it. And a lot of times we talk about repression, dissociation, all these different terms in psychology as bad things, but thank God I was able to do that... I didn't remember it happened to me until I was in rehab working with a therapist."

Path to Modeling and Addiction

In the aftermath of his trauma, Joe found himself drawn into the adult modeling industry, believing that his worth was tied to his body and his ability to please others. This period marked the beginning of his battle with addiction, which was compounded by unresolved trauma and shame.

Joe Weatherford [04:04]: "I was molested as a little girl and then, you know, not surprisingly, went into the adult industry as a model. Left that, went to rehab, went to graduate school, became a counseling professor."

Recovery Journey and Therapeutic Challenges

Joe’s path to recovery was tumultuous. Despite multiple attempts at various rehabilitation programs, including a high-end treatment facility and traditional support groups like AA, he struggled to overcome his addiction. A pivotal moment in his recovery came from an unconventional and ethically troubling experience with a male therapist.

Joe Weatherford [10:23]: "It was a male therapist who helped me process it. And two years later hit on me... He tried to sleep with me."

This betrayal not only deepened his distrust but also fueled his relapse into alcoholism, which persisted for six more years. However, Joe's resilience eventually led him to discover an aversion therapy program that successfully rewired his brain to eliminate his craving for alcohol.

Joe Weatherford [18:57]: "He was the perfect scapegoat for that, you know?... Now me, conscious, sober, a grown woman in my power. I'm like, yeah, I can't believe that guy did that... But I would never turn myself over to him in the way that I did back then."

Discipline vs. Motivation

A significant theme in Joe's recovery is the distinction between motivation and discipline. He emphasizes that while motivation is fleeting, discipline is a steadfast driver of lasting change.

Joe Weatherford [23:08]: "When it comes to something like, 'Oh, I don't drink,' it's like, I'm not going to die. I love myself. I'm healthy. And it's going to that truly."

Shawn and Joe discuss practical strategies for building discipline through small, consistent actions that reinforce positive habits, contrasting them with the unreliable nature of motivation.

Shawn French [24:16]: "But the discipline to say, 'I'm gonna go. I'm gonna walk for about 15 minutes on the treadmill, and then I'm gonna see what's next.'"

Identity Shift and Personal Empowerment

Joe delves into the concept of an identity shift, explaining how redefining oneself is crucial for overcoming past traumas and addictions. He advocates for embracing a new identity that aligns with one's true self rather than a victimhood mentality.

Joe Weatherford [30:19]: "There are things about you that are special and things about you that aren't, but you have them seriously confused."

Through personal anecdotes and professional insights, Joe illustrates how letting go of old identities and embracing new roles can lead to profound personal growth and empowerment.

Societal Issues and Healing

The conversation also touches on broader societal issues such as sexual abuse, substance abuse, and school shootings. Joe shares his perspective on finding beauty amidst tragedy and the importance of focusing on healing rather than victimization.

Joe Weatherford [43:15]: "We do not heal in that energy [of victimhood]."

Advice to Listeners

Towards the end of the episode, Joe offers practical advice for listeners grappling with similar challenges. He emphasizes the importance of self-accountability, setting realistic goals, and surrounding oneself with supportive individuals who recognize and encourage one's inherent greatness.

Joe Weatherford [38:27]: "What I teach people is to not believe the stories. Things can feel real, but they are not true."

Conclusion

In this heartfelt and authentic dialogue, Shawn French and Joe Weatherford explore the depths of human resilience and the transformative power of self-awareness and discipline. Joe's journey from trauma and addiction to recovery and empowerment serves as an inspiring testament to what is possible when one confronts their past and commits to personal growth.

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Notable Quotes:

• Joe Weatherford [04:04]: "We need just enough trauma to be interesting. Boom. You know, you don't want too much, but you don't want to be too, like, spoiled."

• Shawn French [24:16]: "But the discipline to say, 'I'm gonna go. I'm gonna walk for about 15 minutes on the treadmill, and then I'm gonna see what's next.'"

• Joe Weatherford [38:27]: "What I teach people is to not believe the stories. Things can feel real, but they are not true."

• Joe Weatherford [43:15]: "We do not heal in that energy [of victimhood]."

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For more insights and resources, listeners are encouraged to connect with Joe Weatherford through his social media platforms or visit his websites at JoeWeatherford.com and RecoveryRemix.com.

Transcript

[Shawn French]

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[Joe Weatherford]

N.

[N/A]

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You molested as a child? How old were you?

[Joe Weatherford]

I was four. Yeah, you know, not surprisingly went into the adult industry as a model. Our unconscious programming will dictate our life which is where it's so important that we do the work. As a little girl, I developed this belief that a my worth is my body. That I am just here to please men in that way. And. And I also got my wires crossed that being sexually exploited was connection. And this is an important thing when it comes to healing. Like knowledge doesn't change behavior. Like I didn't know how to work through my sexual shame. None of that had happened yet but at least a seed was planted.

[N/A]

Shot French what up? This one luck I let the pain inspire me I put my all in everything I'm doing until it's done I'm me for the entirety I'll put it in overtime I'll be working Just know I'mma go for mine cuz I earned it they watch and I know it's time I confirmed it the whole society determined determin.

What'S up everybody? Welcome back to another episode. I am your host Shawn French and today I have with me an amazing human being. But before I get to her Please hit subscribe on YouTube, follow on Spotify and Apple podcasts. Let us know what you think. And more than anything, share the show with somebody you know, love and trust that would really need to hear this message. So today I have with me an expat, a TEDx speaker, former Playboy model, the amazing Joe Weatherford. What's up?

[Joe Weatherford]

Oh, I'm so glad to be here.

[N/A]

I can't believe you're here. I can't either, dude, we got connected on Instagram because you, you made a post and I can't even remember what the message was, but I was like, dude, like, that's some good ass energy. I want to connect with her. I just hit the like button and said, hey, great message or something. And then what, six months later, here you are.

[Joe Weatherford]

It's so awesome how that works, isn't it?

[N/A]

It's nuts, isn't it?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

Social media can be good.

[Joe Weatherford]

It can be a great thing and.

[N/A]

It can be wholesome.

[Joe Weatherford]

Absolutely right.

[N/A]

So, so tell the audience that may not know who you are. Give them a little bit of your background, some of the things that you've gone through and what has made you the powerful woman you are now. She's like, so many things.

[Joe Weatherford]

So many, so much.

[N/A]

How much time do we have?

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, it's funny because I was just thinking about it. It's like we need just enough trauma to be interesting. Boom. You know, you don't want too much, but you don't want to be too, like, spoiled.

[N/A]

You're dropping bombs already, dude.

Here you go.

[Joe Weatherford]

Just right into it.

[N/A]

Love it.

[Joe Weatherford]

We need just amount, you know, to be fun. Right. So, you know, and I had the things molested as a little girl and then, you know, not surprisingly, went into the adult industry as a model. Left that, went to rehab, went to graduate school, became a counseling professor.

[N/A]

Yes. So crazy.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. I mean, life has just taken me so many great places. And then I ended up leaving the university and running a kid's martial arts program. My ex and I had a big martial arts school.

[N/A]

Really?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

You're a black belt?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

Like, in what?

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, so it was taekwondo.

[N/A]

Okay.

[Joe Weatherford]

And Muay Thai and then krav, and then also Jiu jitsu. But I am not a black belt in that. I suck.

[N/A]

So you're a black belt in the other three?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

So you could literally, like disassemble me right now?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

Piece by piece, like in Krav Forgive. And if I'm wrong to the audience, I'm not always spot on. But Krav Maga is is the one that's usually taught in military for hand to hand combat. Is that correct?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. And it's the one too if, you know, it's most practical if you're attacked, you're elbowing your knees, you know, like nobody's going to get into an actual fistfight, you know.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

I'm not trying to protect myself. Right.

[N/A]

And then the Muay Thai is like the Anderson Silva, the knees to the face. Right?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah, yeah. Lots of knees kicks. Hardcore.

[N/A]

Amazing background. Amazing background. So, okay, so you molested as a child, how old were you?

[Joe Weatherford]

I was four. Yeah. And you know what's crazy is yesterday I was in the airport and there was a girl in the bathroom and she was probably 10 years old and she had a doll that she was carrying and I saw this 10 year old with this doll and like this little girl has somehow maintained her innocence. Right. And I was like, God damn, I lost mine so early. And it wasn't like a poor me, it was just that juxtaposition for sure where was like I'm so glad she has that. Yeah, yeah.

[N/A]

Or you perceive that she still.

[Joe Weatherford]

I perceive.

[N/A]

Right. Cuz we never know. Right. We never know. But I, I'm with you. Chances are she still does have it.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

And I'm, I'm like listening to this and you said four. I, I almost lost it.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

Well, I have a six year old daughter and an eight year old daughter and I cannot even imagine the type of orange jumpsuit I would be in if someone touched any one of my children. Even my son.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

Okay, so like walk, walk me through that. You were four. I don't go through the whole thing but like how, how do you, I mean, how do you remember? That's like kind of an odd question, but it's like how did. I can't even, I can't even formulate it because it's, it's, it's shocking to me.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. What do you do with that?

[N/A]

What do you do with it?

[Joe Weatherford]

So as a child, what I did with it is I repressed it. And a lot of times we talk about repression, disassociation, all these different terms in psychology as bad things, but thank God I was able to do that, you know, cause the four year old has no business trying to make sense of that. So I didn't remember it happened to me until I was in rehab working with a therapist. Got clean and then I was like, oh my God, this happened to me. And what's crazy about it is the police actually got involved because he did it to another little girl, but she told.

[N/A]

Okay.

[Joe Weatherford]

And here's where the story gets really kind of dark for me is I didn't tell. And the fact that I didn't tell, like, plagued me for a long time. That aspect of my personality, that I deserve this, that I'm going to put him ahead of me. I don't want to get him in trouble, so I'm going to hold his shame inside of me. You know, that was so much what led me to my addiction. Not just with him, but all my life experiences, because that's what I chose to do with it.

[N/A]

And it's so hard because as a four year old, you're not consciously thinking about this.

[Joe Weatherford]

No.

[N/A]

You're probably thinking at that age. Right. Okay, that's, that's an elder. I'm just going to stay in line here. Yeah, right. How, how did that coming to, you know, because you repressed it. Right. And, but in the meantime, you, you went to modeling, right. You went to modeling for Playboy and, and you did some reality TV for them and then got out and went to rehab. Right. So how does it all connect for you? How can you make sense of all that? Cause you didn't uncover it until you were, you know, healing. Right.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, and that's the thing our unconscious programming will dictate our life, which is where it's so important that we do the work to uncover those stories, those belief systems, because we don't realize it, but it is dictating the course of our future. And so for me as a little girl, I developed this belief that a my worth is my body, that I am just here to please men in that way. And I also got my wires crossed that being sexually exploited was connection. So it was like, that's what would make me special. That's how I connect, you know, and it really, it was a lot to untangle. But when I finally was like, oh, this happened to me, it started making sense now I still didn't know what to do with it. And this is an important thing when it comes to healing. Like, knowledge doesn't change behavior. Like it opened this window of opportunity for me to go, oh, okay, this is starting to make sense. But I still didn't know how to change. Like, I didn't know how to work through my sexual shame. None of that had happened yet, but at least a seed was planted of, oh, I think this is the origin story.

[N/A]

Wow. Wow. And so when you're working through your therapist, through, you know, getting sober, like how, how did the therapist teach you to walk through and kind of peel back the layers of what happened and, and, and how to. How do you connect it with some of past behavior? You know, mainly, you know, feeling like, you know, giving up your body. Right. Or whatever is. Is kind of your service or however you put it.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

How did. How did the therapist help you work through that? To help you understand, like. No, no, no. That. That is. That is not where you need to be.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, it's a great question, and is.

[N/A]

It because I stumbled through it, I.

[Joe Weatherford]

Knew exactly where you were going with it. And the reason I laughed is because, spoiler alert. It was a male therapist who helped me process it.

[N/A]

Interesting.

[Joe Weatherford]

And two years later hit on me. So here's a person.

[N/A]

Good Lord, no.

[Joe Weatherford]

And I mean, true story, like, waited two years because ethically he had to, or I. He could have lost his license.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

But then spent all this time helping me believe that my sexuality is not what makes me special. And then tried to sleep with me.

[N/A]

So he didn't just try to take you out. He, like, literally tried to sleep with you. It wasn't like he was interested, you know, or approached it the right way because, I mean, after a couple of years, if he would have asked you or approached you like respectful men, would you have had a problem with that?

[Joe Weatherford]

You know, I still, I think when a relationship is formed and there's that level of a power differential, I always think it's wrong, but it wouldn't have caused the damage that it did, which was he sent me an email like, I want to show you what a real man is. And I was just like, okay, so now there's no.

[N/A]

Who do I trust now?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. And I already. I was like, men are shit. You know what I mean? And I didn't even consciously think. Think that. But, like, that, again, was a very strong programming that I had to come to believe, but I didn't even realize.

[N/A]

That's some wild stuff, right? That's wild.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

Like, like, not even. And again, when there's a role established, like you said, the relationship. Right.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

He's to help heal. And like, you were. You were here. Right. You know, trying to get here. Like, you can't circumvent that. That. Those roles in that relationship.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah, It.

[N/A]

To me, that is just a lack of. I don't know what. It's just a lack of common sense, to be quite honest. I mean, I'm just going to say it like, that's just not cool. But, I mean, it would have been at least a little Bit better if he approached you respectfully.

[Joe Weatherford]

Right.

[N/A]

Like, it wouldn't have caused that damage. So talk to me about that damage.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, I had been sober for a year and a half, and I started drinking. And I'm not blaming him for that because I really believe that that relapse was in me. It was already within me.

[N/A]

It was coming. Right?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

It's like it wants to come out and party, wants to peek its head.

[Joe Weatherford]

He was the mirror, you know, exposed that which was. Was already there. And it was a perfect excuse, and it was a great one, you know, And I got to run with that story. This thing happened to me, poor me. This is why I started drinking again. Because in addiction, that's what we do. We're always blaming someone else. And so, yeah, he was the perfect scapegoat for that, you know? Now me, conscious, sober, a grown woman in my power. I'm like, yeah, I can't believe that guy did that. Blah, blah, blah. But I would never. I would never turn myself over to him in the way that I did back then.

[N/A]

So from that point when you had that relapse because of that. Well, that, that really. It was like the straw that broke the camel's back. That's what we call it. Right.

[Joe Weatherford]

How.

[N/A]

How long was the relapse or how. Whatever you. How long did that go for?

[Joe Weatherford]

It was a. It was about six years. It was a good run.

[N/A]

So it was a good run.

[Joe Weatherford]

Um, yeah, I mean, and I. I was really sick. It was interesting when I did my TED Talk. Everybody's like, don't read the comments. And of course, what did I do? I read the comments. Yeah, but a lot of what people were saying is, oh, what did she go through? I bet it wasn't that bad. She could never relate to my story. And it's interesting.

[N/A]

Were these men or women?

[Joe Weatherford]

Oh, men and women. Young, old. You know how the haters.

[N/A]

There's just a lot of. A lot of victims, like, in the comment section, right?

[Joe Weatherford]

A variety, sure. But what's fascinating, I get it. You look at me today and you wouldn't know where I come from. And it's like, no, I've been in jail, multiple suicide attempts. I woke up once chained to a bed in a mental institution in San Francisco, which, if you have to go to a mental institution, you want to go to San Francisco does not disappoint.

[N/A]

Really? Why is that?

[Joe Weatherford]

You know, I mean, just that level of crazy. It was like, let's go all in. I'm an all in person.

[N/A]

You heard it Ladies and gentlemen, if you're going to go all in, get locked up in a mental institution in San Francisco Bay area in California. The weather there is better.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah, it was beautiful.

[N/A]

You don't even need. You don't even need. Oh, you. Nice view then.

[Joe Weatherford]

I did.

[N/A]

No wonder you liked it. So, I mean. But again, I think. Let me speak to the audience really quickly, because I think what's great here for you guys listening and watching is I want you to really understand the story that is going on right now coming from a place of power and not victimhood, a place of accountability and storytelling for you guys. You know, whatever you're going through, you're not alone. There's people that have become massive successes, like Joe here that have been through some stuff. So continue to listen and see what you can get out of this. Because, again, you know, like, this is all informational. This is good stuff. I love it. I'm not surprised. I knew. I knew we'd start going here, you know, get. Get the juices flowing. Okay, so, okay, in San Francisco, right, You, like you said, been in jail multiple times. You've been in facilities. Like, what was the fight back like? Because that had to have. You've had to have displayed an extreme amount of determination in order to rise up out of that type of space.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. And I think, too, I'm. So. When I did my TED Talk, the whole point of it was finding the beauty an addiction. And we all need to know that we can overcome. And so certainly being an alcoholic for most of my life at that level where it was all encompassing. And I like sharing this because, yes, if anybody is listening right now and you're like, oh, I can't get better, trust me, I was that person. I've worked in addiction recovery for over 13 years, and I'm still one of the worst alcoholics I've ever seen.

[N/A]

Really.

[Joe Weatherford]

And if I can do it, anyone can do it, because I'm not special.

[N/A]

Right. What made you the worst?

[Joe Weatherford]

It was all day, every day, you know, DTs, no matter what the consequence was. And I was not one of those people that was in denial. Like, to me, denial. I'm like, I don't really believe it. I think you just don't want to change.

[N/A]

Right? Of course.

[Joe Weatherford]

So for me, I knew it. I owned it. I was like, I'm really sick. I need help. I was trying. I was going to different rehab facilities. I did the bougie ass, $100,000 one. You know, I did, like, regular treatment. I tried everything. I tried aa. And I could not get better.

[N/A]

Wow.

[Joe Weatherford]

And finally what happened was my mom heard about this aversion therapy program, which. It was the only one in its country. In the country. And it closed. I'm so sad. But it was gnarly. So you'd go in this little room, and they would inject me with something that caused flu, like, symptoms. And then I'd drink a water glass, full episode epicac. So having kids, you know, you would give them like, a tablespoon of epicac if they ate something they shouldn't to induce vomiting.

[N/A]

Okay, no, interesting.

[Joe Weatherford]

I'm drinking a water glass full of this, and then I'm just pounding drinks. Like, I'm talking 20 full glasses of alcohol and then just vomiting like the Exorcist. It was.

[N/A]

Wow.

[Joe Weatherford]

Awful. Awful.

[N/A]

So. So you went through a treatment that created an aversion to what you were addicted to.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes. And trust me, I didn't think it was going to work because I'm like, I drink and puke all the. That's a Tuesday.

[N/A]

That's a Wednesday for me, guys. That's hump day.

[Joe Weatherford]

Not like this.

[N/A]

I need one for chocolate, I feel like.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah, right. It doesn't work for other things, unfortunately. They tried it for opiates, they tried it with weed. Like, none of that.

[N/A]

Nothing. Nothing.

[Joe Weatherford]

It works for alcohol, though.

[N/A]

So what was the science behind that? Because, I mean, that. That's pretty aggressive. Right? Well.

[Joe Weatherford]

And yeah. So you're. You're training the brain to not crave it. Right. So dopamine. Right. Is this gnarly little thing that we love that tells us, oh, do that thing, and then you get to fantasize about how good it's gonna feel.

[N/A]

Yep.

[Joe Weatherford]

You know, and so it kind of reset that. But what they did that I think actually worked was we would do the aversion therapy one day, and the next day they did a treatment of profenol, which is the stuff that Michael Jackson OD'd on. It's kind of an anesthetic.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

And truth serum. And they'd shoot you up with this, and you would do a counseling session with your unconscious, wake up in a room, and then listen back to these tapes.

[N/A]

So it was a disassociate.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

Kind of like ketamine.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes, similar. But you. So you're doing therapy with the unconscious, and they're also implanting beliefs like, I don't drink. I don't crave alcohol.

[N/A]

I love that.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. So my brain, for better or worse, it's. It's like my superpower and also what almost killed me is I'm very adaptable, Right. So I'm like, oh, yeah, okay. I don't drink. So 13 years ago, I do this thing. I've never wanted to drink since.

[N/A]

Interesting. That. That's wild, right? That's wild.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

Because, you know, when. You know, and there's a lot of people that listen to the show, they're. They're probably on health journeys or they're entrepreneurs or athletes or whatever. And a lot of times when we're trying to create new habits, right. We're trying to ditch old ones instead of, don't eat that. It's like, I don't eat that. I don't eat sweets. Right. And so kind of what you're saying is you went through that same kind of therapy, like, I don't drink alcohol. I don't crave alcohol. It is a good way to rewire your brain. I don't know if it works for chocolate or not, because. Sorry, spoiler, guys. I still love chocolate, you know, But. But again, I. You know, for extended period of times, I can tell myself, this does not serve me.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

But then one night. What? Any given night, if I have one, I have 15. And I'm not talking beers. I'm talking about, like, Reese's Pieces.

[Joe Weatherford]

Oh, yeah. Like, dude, I get it.

[N/A]

I crush them. The peanut butter crush them. So. But I get it, you know, it's. It's an interesting thing. So you. You did that, and then after that, you were good. How long ago that was? You said 13 years ago.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

Okay. Wow.

[Joe Weatherford]

And I think it's also when we're talking about don't do something, right? Like, a lot of times our brains don't register. Don't. So if you think about, you've got a kid next to you and you say to them, don't run out in front of the street. What do they hear? Run out in the street. So it's almost like that idea of 2. Encoding what we want, which is, I eat healthy. I choose to eat healthy. I ran a gym for a long time. I watched hundreds of people try to lose weight.

[N/A]

Wow.

[Joe Weatherford]

And some of them very successful, some of them not at all. And most. Right. Because this is usually the story. I do it for a while, and then I go back into my old habits. Because, let's be real, motivation is a fickle mistress. She's like, here one minute, she's gone next.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. You really have to know your why and truly embody it, you know? So when it comes to something like Oh, I don't drink. It's like, I'm not going to die. Right. So I love myself. I'm healthy. And it's going to that truly. Like, I choose to live. I choose to love.

[N/A]

Right.

[Joe Weatherford]

I choose to show up. I choose to be present. And you know what? I see with a lot of people, I work with a lot of high performers and athletes and clients, and they don't have an addiction the way I had an addiction, but they're still drinking to the point that is negatively impacting them. And this is so much of America. Right. Like, I'm grateful I was. No question you need help. Because being just kind of above the line, it's almost more challenging.

[N/A]

Yeah. And it's more dangerous.

[Joe Weatherford]

It is. And it's like, what are you really losing? Well, the two days that you're hungover, the time with your family, you know, your wife is sick of it. Like, your job is suffering. Right. But it's this thing that it's not quite bad enough to force you to do something, but, you know, you need to change.

[N/A]

I love it. And, you know, it's so funny, because I want to go back to what you said. Motivation is a fickle mistress. I try to convince people this all the time on the show. Right. For the listeners and. And the viewers, you know exactly where I'm going to go with this. And if it's your first time listener watching, you're welcome. Here it goes. You can walk into a Tony Robbins seminar. You can walk into the most impactful room with a bunch of entrepreneurs and motivational speakers. How Eric Thomas could be playing in your ear on Loop for 24 7, 365. Eventually, motivation will fade. The emotion goes away. And what is going to carry you through in those moments is true discipline and determination. People get lost in that middle. They're in the tradition. They can't see it. They want that motivation. I need the motivation to go do this. No, you don't. You need to look at the purpose. What's your purpose? What are you chasing? And then go chase that.

[Joe Weatherford]

Right, Right. And when you don't want to do it anyway, and that's the biggest thing is being able to just sit in your shit and sit in the stillness, sit in it when it's not fun, you know, and get up and do the thing that you don't want to do. And it starts with those little habits. Get up and make your bed first thing, start with a win. You know, do your gratitude list in the morning. Like, we need to train our Brains to be successful. Because our brains are very reptilian. They're built for survival, not happiness.

[N/A]

You know, it's. It's. Our brain is wired to keep us safe. Right. So that means we're treating when things get hard. And so this morning, and I. And I talk about this a lot because it happens a lot. I woke up, my neck hurt, my back hurt. I'm like, I really don't want to get up and go to the gym.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

So I got up and I went to the gym, and here's where people are going to misinterpret what I'm saying. So a lot of people feel like, oh, that's hustle culture. No. No. Telling yourself you have to go 100,000 miles an hour, no matter if your body's about to break or keep going, and beating your body into the ground and having zero regard for your physicality and your emotional state. That's hustle culture.

[Joe Weatherford]

Right.

[N/A]

But the discipline to say, I'm gonna go. I'm gonna walk for about 15 minutes on the treadmill, and then I'm gonna see what's next. Because what happens there is we unlock these checkpoints in our brain. Right.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yep.

[N/A]

Doing the next right thing. So I'm gonna put my shoes on, and I'm gonna walk to the door. Then I'm gonna open the door, and then I'm gonna get in the truck, and then I'm gonna drive to the gym. Then I'm gonna get out of the truck, and then I'm gonna get into the gym. Like, you see my point? It's all these checkpoints that we do that people need to understand when we do those things, we are building discipline, and we are building positive habits. That's what we mean by when you say. When I say, you don't feel like it, do it anyway.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. You have to learn to override your system, because if you give in every single time, that is also a muscle. If you're like, oh, it's hard, I quit.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

Great. Good luck with that.

[N/A]

Cool. Good luck with life.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah, exactly. We know how that ends.

[N/A]

So what do you say to the people? Because I. Sorry. Sorry. I have to ask this before. Don't forget. Don't lose that train of thought, because I know you're onto something. But I have to say this because my ADHD will torch me if I don't. What do you say to the people? Well, that's not self love.

[Joe Weatherford]

Great question. I think you really nailed it, though. Okay. When we talk about this hustle culture and over performing. If I don't feel like going to the gym and saying I need to get up and like David Goggins this shit and go run 30 miles, that's not loving. That's not aligned with true self care and my deeper intention of health and wellness. Right. But if I get up and say I'm going to go sit on the stationary bike and I'm going to ride for 15 minutes and I'm going to do the thing that I know is going to improve my health and my longevity and allowed me to carry my grandkids when I'm 80, how is that not the most loving thing that you could do?

[N/A]

Exactly. I love it.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah. No question. I mean, movement is, is everything. Movement, breath, right? Like all of these things that we disregard and people will be like, oh, that's just some hippie, you know, like, whatever. It's like, no, this is. This is it.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

And we can read all the books and we can get addicted to healing. I know a lot of people, they are stuck in their story. They are always onto the next thing. There's always a new diet. There's always a new ailment to heal. There's always some new protocol. There's, you know, it's like, at what point are you just living, right?

[N/A]

You're, you're cracking me up, Joe. Because I, I have some people in my life, right, that they're always on this journey of, you know, self improvement, but yet they're the most miserable people I know.

[Joe Weatherford]

Amen.

[N/A]

They're, they're down and out. They're like Eeyore from Winnie the freaking Pooh.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

And it's like, okay, you're, you're on this journey, but are you really on this journey? Right. Because here's the problem. People think that watching the YouTube video, reading the book, doing the meditation is the growth. Nah, nah, nah, nah. That's part of it. What real growth is is identifying the things in your life that are holding you in shackles and then cutting them off. Too many people are too afraid to cut off the shackles.

[Joe Weatherford]

Absolutely. And it's all about those distractions and those tiny little changes in behavior. We always go to these big, massive disruptions, right? Like quit your job, you know, lose £100, get sober. All this stuff. Like, great. And that's amazing. And it's the micro adjustments. I mean, I love this study that they did where they took all these people that had something great happen, right? Like they won the lottery or they had something tragic.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

They lost a leg and they looked at their set point of happiness, and within six months of something great or something awful happening, they were all back at it. So really, it's these little tiny adjustments in our behaviors, our patterns, our thoughts, you know, and. And so much of it comes down to acceptance, being able to meet yourself where you really are at, because we get lost in the delusion of, I'll be happy when I'll be happy when I lose £20, I'll be happy when I have the relationship, I'll be happy when I have the car. And then wherever you go, there you are. So it's like, how in this moment, do I love what is and inspire change? And again, a lot of that does come down to discipline, and it's having people around us that see our greatness, you know, and that's the other thing that is happening at such a big rate, you know, like, you have one of those eras in your life and you forget that energy is always being affected, and somebody's gonna turn you on or turn you off, you know? And so we have to be so diligent with our front row five. You know, we've got a lot of acquaintances. We got a lot of people in the auditorium of our story, our performance. But, like, who are your front row five? Because I want the people that are like, I know who you are. Yeah, I see your greatness, and I'm gonna speak to it, and I'm gonna hold you accountable to what I know you really are.

[N/A]

It's amazing.

[Joe Weatherford]

And sometimes it's those hard conversations that are the most impactful. I'll tell you. I was in charge of doing all the addiction talks for the university and the athletes, right. At the University of Nevada. So there was this amazing sports psychologist that was in town, and I said, hey, would you come and watch me do this talk? You know? And I thought he was going to watch it and just tell me how great I am. Right. You know, at the time, I was dating a guy that played for the Yankees, so I dropped that, and I, you know, I did my thing, right, And I thought it was awesome. So we go to Starbucks afterwards. And I said, so what did you think? And he goes, do you really want to know?

[N/A]

And I was like, give me coffee back.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah, well, now I do.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

And he goes, you use your looks and you lose your power. He said, you will interest people, but you're never actually going to move them.

[N/A]

Shit.

[Joe Weatherford]

And then he said, there are things about you that are special and things about you that aren't. And you have Them seriously confused.

[N/A]

Okay, So I want the audience to really dive into that and think about that. Can you repeat that?

[Joe Weatherford]

There are things about you that are special and things about you that aren't, but you have them seriously confused.

[N/A]

That is feedback that most people. I'm sure you hated to hear it. Right? I'm sure that was like. Right, but. But did it serve you?

[Joe Weatherford]

It split me open in the best way. It's why I can do what I do now with my clients and speaking. But it comes to that moment as a child of who did I have to become to earn your love? You know, because so much of us grow up with families like that and it's not our parents fault, it's just the way it is. I love you as long as you're quiet. I love you as long as you're athletic. I love you as long as you're pretty. I love you as long as Whatever. So it's like who did you have to become in order to be loved?

[N/A]

So what was it about you that wasn't special that you thought was and then vice versa.

[Joe Weatherford]

I mean, it goes back to that little girl who was four molested behind the rocks that it was all about looks and I didn't understand. It's about energy and it's about connection. And it is about when you meet somebody that is really present with themselves and can be present with you, there is an aliveness that happens. It's happening right now. And it's hard to even speak about because there are no words to describe this feeling.

[N/A]

You can't describe energy, like real energy. Like, you know what I mean? Like we have people in our lives, you know, friends, the energy with my wife, energy you, you have with your boyfriend. Like you can't describe that. It is a true feeling. Yeah, it is a true feeling. But like, so anyway, go, go on. Because I know that people listening, they're like, energy. Like, what does that really mean? Because some people aren't tuned into it well.

[Joe Weatherford]

And here's the other piece of it. A lot of times when things feel safe in our bodies, they don't feel good because we're used to chaos. Like, I am finally in a healthy relationship, which is great because I'm like, how do I know? I'm crushing it in life. I actually choose a healthy relationship for the first time in my life.

[N/A]

That's awesome though.

[Joe Weatherford]

I'm attracted to it. I want it, I deserve it. All of it, right? Like, I know that my healing has come, you know, to at least a partial completion because I want some. Someone healthy. But I was talking to my girlfriend who's still stuck in one of those chaotic, dysfunctional drama. But, you know, the sex is good. It's always good all in.

[N/A]

Stay there.

[Joe Weatherford]

It's. But, like, we forget that the adrenaline, the cortisol, the feeling unsafe can also, you know, be very enticing.

[N/A]

And it's an aphrodisiac, right?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

It's like. It's like, you know, in a public area, it's like you're scared to get caught. And it intensifies the moment.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

Right. So it's just like. I don't want to equate it to that, but that's the only thing I can really, you know, like, okay, I'm in this relationship. Every. Everything physical is great. It's a rush. I'm going to stay in it, even though emotionally and spiritually it's destroying me.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, and even the withholding love and the disappointment, the highs, the lows, that is also part of the addiction. The chasing love, the losing it, the needing to hold on. I mean, the brain is lighting up just like it does with heroin. These toxic relationships are intoxicating for a reason. It is a chemical shit show in your brain. You know, it's so much beyond just the crazy, animalistic sex. They hook us.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

In the most insane ways. But I'll tell you, I. So I had one recent experience with somebody, and you know how when you. You're making a change, the universe is kind of like, are you sure? You know, are you sure?

[N/A]

Dude, the unit. Okay, hold on. Because I got a bone to pick with the universe a little bit. She's always coming around and slapping me in the back of the head.

[Joe Weatherford]

Oh, yeah.

[N/A]

It's like the moment. I feel like things are getting solid. Just like, take it.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

Let me see what you do with it. Can you stay on your A game? Are you gonna react? Are you gonna respond? She did that to me three times today. Oh, it was a big day. It was a big day. You know, everything I had going on today. Right. And having this amazing conversation was at the top of that list. But the bottom line is I was tested. I was tested. Are you going to respond or are you going to react? And it was in multiple areas of my life. It wasn't the biggest ones. Wasn't business.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

That's the thing. Right. To your point. So the universe will always come and say, like, hey, are you really reformed or are you going here? Because if you can push through this uncomfortable moment now, your growth's going to accelerate. And by the way, I went through like, you know, multiple times, like texting. And I'm like, okay, no, no, erase that. Okay. You know. Okay. Okay, that's good.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yep.

[N/A]

And. And the funny thing is people that are listening are like, oh, no, no, I know what he's talking about. No, you don't. Because if I spoke about it to a person, then it, then it wasn't it. I had to check myself and not speak on it.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes. Amen for that silence. That's. That is so often the true growth. But it's true. It's like, how are you gonna show up? You said you want this thing. You say, this is who you are. Are you sure? Because so much of that is life. This is who I wanna be. This is who I am. And it's the space in between that is depression, anxiety, addiction, shitty relationships. Right. But instead of growth and becoming that. Right. Collapsing time into her, we lower our standards.

[N/A]

Yep, yep.

[Joe Weatherford]

And we just take the easy way out. But it's. Those tests are so precious and important. And it's funny because I was tested too. I got three hours of sleep last night and I could hear the stories. You're not gonna do a good job. This is a really big deal, you know, blah, blah, blah. And then I'm just like, oh my God. Okay. What do I teach people is to not believe the stories. Things can feel real, but they are not true. And what I came to was maybe being so dead ass tired will shut down an aspect of me that I really need to shut off and allow something else to come through. And so it's not silver lining it, it's not the toxic positivity or whatever, but it's like the universe has your back or it doesn't. It's happening for you or to you. And what do you really believe?

[N/A]

And that, and that's a perspective, right?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

That's your choice that we get to make every single day. You know, it's funny. First of all, thank you for caring so much that this is a big deal. Yes. And I can tell you that you are absolutely crushing it. So. Yes. So none of your, your limiting beliefs last night that you were, that were rushing through your mind are actually real. And that's the point to you guys that are listening and watching. You're every day going to go through your mind back and forth. There's this constant mental tug of war. Right. I'm good enough. I'm not good enough. But you know what? What if I screw up here? I did it today, Right? We all do it. I'm not speaking from a place of, like, hierarchy here. I'm speaking a place of, like, I'm a freaking mess. Like, I do this too, right? And I'm constantly proven wrong and proven wrong in a good way. Like, okay, I am good enough. I am ready for this. So, Sean, cut the crap. Like, really just rest on the fact that you are prepared. Because if you're doing the work in between the micro things that you're talking about earlier in the conversation, like getting up and doing the workout, getting up and doing the hard thing, shooting the show, like, talking to the guests, like, having great conversations, it all builds up for a moment, and you're either ready to execute or you're not. And it's typically because you shut some parts of you down that. That for me earlier, it was like a, am I going to perform well? And, like, am I going to do well at this specific task? Because this is different than anything I've ever done. I chose to suppress that side of me and just go, what? Like, I'm here for a reason.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

Like, I'm on this for a reason. So I'm gonna own it.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yep.

[N/A]

I'm gonna own it. And I can't say the wrong thing to the right person. So.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, and that's the real empowerment is when you go, okay, and even if the worst thing happens, I'll be okay. And that is what adversity means, allows us to do. Even if the worst thing happens. I got me.

[N/A]

Yes, yes.

[Joe Weatherford]

That to me is freedom.

[N/A]

But I want you to dig into that right there. Because even if the worst happens. I got me. There's a lot of people out there that can't say that because they don't believe that they do have them. What would you say to that? To that man or woman that truly doesn't feel like they got themselves? Where would you start them? Because I know you coach a lot of high performers and people in general, like, this could massively change someone's life.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, it's often in one of those apex moments of pain. I mean, for me, it was a divorce. It wasn't even my addiction when I really learned this about myself. So sold businesses, moved to another country, were there for a year, get divorced.

[N/A]

Mexico, right?

[Joe Weatherford]

In Mexico, he moved all of our money into an account I wasn't on, cancel my credit cards, and I'm alone in another country with no money.

[N/A]

Cool beans, man.

[Joe Weatherford]

Freaking out. You know, just Mexico, of all places. Yeah.

[N/A]

I mean, this can't even drink the Water.

[Joe Weatherford]

There it was. It was one of those moments. I'm like, all right, so I'm spinning out. I'm freaking out. And it was great because one of my friends literally grabbed my face. It was a pattern interrupt, right? Cause I was just hijacked in my fear. He's like, yo, he is not the source of your love. He is not the source of your money. He is not the source of your happiness. And I was like, oh, that's why I was so worked up is because this person who's obviously unsafe and hates me, I have given all my power to. Of course I am spinning. So where are you giving your power to?

[N/A]

So good.

[Joe Weatherford]

Who or what? What Job? Bank account? What did you allow to tell you if you are enough?

[N/A]

Wow.

[Joe Weatherford]

That is what I would say to them.

[N/A]

I love that. Because we all go through these things, right? Whether it's an attachment to money, attachment to the wrong partner, attachment to an identity like a career or being an athlete. Right?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yep.

[N/A]

We. When we. When we fear losing things, it's because we've wrapped our identity in something else, and we've given our power, like you said, to another thing or another person, which leaves us coincidentally powerless. Yes. So, of course, how could we ever make it on our own? But when we quickly realize by doing work on our own selves that, wait a second, the power is still here. I can turn it on, but I got to. I got to prime the engine a little bit, right. I got to do some work, and then I have to choose to believe.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, and it's again, it's all energy. It's all framework. It's all perspective. I was working with NFL player that retired, and he goes, who am I now? Instead of who am I now? Like, it's just that it's the same words, but a different energy, a possibility. And what if you didn't have to be anything to anybody anymore? What if you just got to be and you got to sit on a couch and talk to somebody cool and learn some shit about life and connect and have a real moment and that were enough.

[N/A]

You know, I could dig that, Joe, because I think one of the biggest things whether. See, it's an identity shift, right? So I did. When I did my TedX talk, I did it on identity crisis after leaving sports because I truly felt that when I left, you know, college baseball, I was like, I was done. I didn't go pro, and my last game was in the College World Series in 2003 in the right field when we lost our. When that last out recorded. My season was over. I didn't know who I was. Right. I've talked about this a lot. I'm sure you've heard this before from me before. But, you know, over the last year or so I go, wait a second. This just isn't in athletics. This is in, you know, if you're a teacher and you go to salesperson, or if you're a salesperson, you go to a teacher, or if you're an H VAC technician and now you're the business owner, there's an identity shift. It's not a crisis. It's only a crisis if you allow it to be. But there needs to be an identity shift. Right. And too many people are getting caught up on the negative aspect of that. Like, well, who am I now? Instead of like, ooh, wait a second. Yeah, I get to play a different role. What does that look like?

[Joe Weatherford]

Yes.

[N/A]

You know, how can, how can I be really good at that? So, you know, bringing in the excitement and the perspective to those moments, I think is everything.

[Joe Weatherford]

Absolutely. And again, when you're in the hard ones, it's like, oh, this is my moment for growth. And really just remembering that it is an opportunity and it sucks. And I'm by no means saying don't feel all of it. The disappointment, the anger, the fear. You know, that's what allows us to be so magnetic, is when we can hold both equally the joy and the pain and we can accept it all, be with it. You know, the, the most detrimental thing we can say is that shouldn't have happened to me because you know what? It did.

[N/A]

And that's victim. That's victimhood right there. Like, you cannot move in that space.

[Joe Weatherford]

We do not heal in that energy. And so whatever you need to do, set a timer for two minutes, complain, blame, do all the things, and then turn it around because you deserve it.

[N/A]

I think, I think again to your point, I want everybody to really dial into this. We're not saying, and she's not saying, I'm not saying that. Don't sit in those feelings for a little bit. Like, I think it's okay. It's healthy too. Like, hey, I'm give myself a 10 minute timer. I'm going to drown in my own you know what right now, and I'm going to play victim. But then after that timer goes off, I'm a shift.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, and there is a way to grieve or process emotions with reverence, with dignity. It's. How do I hold myself as I move through this pain that's what matters. That's the difference between somebody who is going to thrive or simply survive. Because we can talk about resilience all day long and that's great. And people will tell me that all day and I appreciate it. Oh, you're resilient. But for me I'm like, that's not really what I'm looking for. To me it's grit. Because grit is not just I will survive, it's bring it.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

It's that attitude of that trickster energy that's like whatever you throw at me, I'm gonna figure it out and I'm gonna make it a game. And I'm going to do this with my heart open and without getting bitter, without getting hardened, like I'm here for it. And that to me is what makes a beautiful life. Because this stuff is going to happen.

[N/A]

And see that's the thing. I think it's the having the, the wherewithal and the confidence level right by doing the work on ourselves to be okay no matter what hits me today. Even if the worst thing would happen. I got it.

[Joe Weatherford]

I'll figure it out.

[N/A]

I'll figure it out. Everything is. You know, my sister in law is so funny. We, we have this great connection. Her name is Michelle. She's one of my favorite people on this planet.

[Joe Weatherford]

Nice.

[N/A]

I absolutely love her. I can watch shows with her that I can't watch with my wife. So thank you, Michelle. I love you, sis. You know, but, but she always says everything's figureoutable, figureoutable, figureoutable. Like, you know, we can get through anything. Now again, there are certain tragedies. I don't want to be insensitive to that. But just the normal day to day. Like if the, if the worst thing in air quotes were to happen right now, are you ready for it? Can you get through it? Do you have safe falls?

[Joe Weatherford]

You know, I want to share this story with you. Like I said, my TED talk was all about finding the beauty and tragedy essentially. So I give my talk the woman that goes on stage after me lost her kid at Sandy Hook.

[N/A]

Oh geez.

[Joe Weatherford]

And I'm like, you guys, are you kidding me right now?

[N/A]

That's a bad not okay.

[Joe Weatherford]

So she comes up to me afterwards and she goes, I loved your talk and I really believe you. I believe we can find the beauty in the tragedy. She looks at me dead in the eyes and goes, but tell me how do I find the beauty in somebody shooting my 6 year old in the head? And it was just this moment.

[N/A]

My skin is like My hair is on end right now. Like, there's no beauty in that.

[Joe Weatherford]

But the beauty is in knowing that every single day of that boy's life for six years, he knew he was loved. The beauty is in her willingness to get up on stage and talk about senseless gun violence and spread a very powerful message. The beauty is in the other parents that have sadly gone through the same tragedy that now have hope. You know what I mean? Like, the beauty is in the love, never in the violence. And that is the thing we all need to remember, though. You are never responsible for what happens to you, but you are responsible for your healing. We must choose, so move forward.

[N/A]

I'm rarely at a loss for words. Right. And I'm sitting here thinking, like, almost in tears because I have three beautiful children.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

And the biggest fear I have every single day is I'm just going to let you and the audience know right now is the moment I dropped them off at school.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

I fear that. I fear it in my soul. I fear it in my bones. And it's just something that. I don't know if I'll ever get over that.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

Because society has taught me one thing. No one's safe from it. It can happen anywhere.

[Joe Weatherford]

Right.

[N/A]

And, you know, it's a part of a bunch of different, you know, issues in society. Whether, you know, people want to say these kids are raised poorly or they're, you know, caught up in social media, they're. They've been bullied, whatever. Whatever the case may be, on and on, all can be true. All can be true. But my biggest fear is that alone right there, and for that woman that you had the opportunity to meet at your TED Talk, she actually lived it.

[Joe Weatherford]

She has stepped through it, is with it every day, I am certain. And there is an aliveness and real to her that you don't get to meet very often. It was interesting. I was listening to Elizabeth Gilbert, who wrote Eat, Pray, Love Talk about the death of her. Her former spouse. And she said the thing I was so scared about when grieving death was depression. She goes, but I didn't realize there's an aliveness to the grief. She goes, what we're really afraid of is apathy. The numbness, the nothingness, you know, which is ironic, because when so many of us feel that intense pain, what do we do? We reach for something to numb it. Whether it's a pill, a drink, whatever it is, we are still feeling it, but we don't know that we're feeling it anymore. Right. But it's like, how do we anchor in and be with all of that and just realize that that is also. God.

[N/A]

It'S amazing to me how dynamic this conversation is. Right. We've talked about a plethora of things, and most of them are societal issues.

[Joe Weatherford]

Yeah.

[N/A]

You know, sexual abuse, you know, substance abuse, school shootings. You know, these are all real things that people in society are going through. You yourself have gone through two of the three. And I just think it's a beautiful conversation because that's what I love about the show, is that it's so freaking real, man. Like, we are. We have conversations here that, you know, quite honestly, we don't know where they're going to go before the show because I don't script anything. And that's the beautiful part about it. Right? And we get to have these conversations. Like it. There's an aliveness to this part that, good Lord willing, I'll get to the baseball field safely, because we never know. And I get to see my kids and I get to coach my son. And that is something that. If you were a parent and you're asleep at the wheel and you don't see the true value and. And the opportunity daily that you get, you get to make their breakfast, you get to raise them, you get to have these conversations with them, you get to have these hard moments with them, because some parents don't get to anymore. It's powerful.

[Joe Weatherford]

Absolutely. And it is. It's. It's about those moments.

[N/A]

Why are you getting me all emotional? You fly to Florida and you make me all.

[Joe Weatherford]

I was just, like, I woke up this morning, like, I'm gonna make him cry.

[N/A]

Talk about kids. That is. That is super easy. Like, you want to see me get choked up? Talk about safety of children like that. That for me, like, is. Is it like that? That is my. On a dime. Like, I can have bipolar emotions. I could be here. And then you say, what about this with kids?

[Joe Weatherford]

Like, oh, boom.

[N/A]

But I. But I think that that's also a gift of mine because it makes me, you know, with. We had this. This conversation earlier on a show was, you know, talk about what. What is real masculinity? You know, some people feel that real masculinity is men should not cry. You know, men crying is, you know, falling to pieces. And if a man falls to pieces, how can he be the warrior of the family? Like, dude, to me, if I cry, it's usually surrounding my children, right? Or this. This thought of something that did not happen. The fear of something could happen. But it. But what it does is it re centers me into a warrior that can be present for the family.

[Joe Weatherford]

Absolutely.

[N/A]

I think it's overlooked.

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, and it just, my brain naturally goes through. I know men that can't cry because that was beat physically into them at such an early age. And any emotion, they were physically beat. They cannot cry and they therefore cannot love.

[N/A]

Yeah.

[Joe Weatherford]

And it's so sad.

[N/A]

It is sad. It's nuts. Well, what a conversation. Good guy. How can the audience find you? How could they, how could they potentially work with you? How could they learn more about you?

[Joe Weatherford]

So I'm very active on, especially Instagram, but I have Facebook and it's just O Weatherford. And then you can also find me at Joe weatherford.com or recoveryremix.com and you know, any questions, any resources, just anything you found interesting, I'd love to know. I'm always so curious to know what landed with people so well, you know.

[N/A]

I appreciate you and you know, it's been a special conversation. You know, I always love every conversation we have on the show. It's great when I get an amazing guest in person, I'm able to connect with them on a different level and have a real open and fruitful conversation. So I just want to thank you for that because when, when those things happen, then the audience wins and people heal and they, and they, they are introduced to another, you know, person that could be in their auditorium cheering them on. And that person is you in this sense. So I really appreciate you. Thank you so much for coming on.

[Joe Weatherford]

It's been an honor to be here. Thank you for having me.

[N/A]

Honor to have you here. So, good lord, I I audience, I just want to, you know, say please, you know, check in with Joe, go follow her on social media and really dial into what she has going on. She's a truly amazing person or she wouldn't have flown from Nevada, Arizona, wherever she is now, she's jet setting everywhere. Are you now, are you in Arizona?

[Joe Weatherford]

Well, I'm still based out of Cabo. I've been in Reno for a while, so.

[N/A]

It's Reno. I thought you. Why did I think you're in Arizona?

[Joe Weatherford]

I was two weeks ago.

[N/A]

See, there, there it is. I can't keep up with her. I can't keep up with her. But she's an amazing person and, and if you listen to this episode and, and some of the things really resonated with you personally, then please reach out to one of us. You're never alone. If in fact, this episode reminded you of somebody that could really use to hear the message, Please send it over to them, share it with them, and let them know that this conversation could impact their day. So again, thank you for listening. Until next time, stay determined.

This one luck I let the pain inspire me I put my all in Everything I'm doing up until it's done I'm me for the entirety I put in overtime I'll be working Just know I'm a go for mine Because I earned it they watch and I know it's time I confirmed it A whole society determined determined.