Podcast Summary: The Diary Of A CEO with Steven Bartlett
Episode: Most Replayed Moment: Is Modern Parenting Causing ADHD? Your Decisions Shape Your Child’s Mind!
Release Date: December 27, 2025
Episode Overview
This high-impact episode of The Diary Of A CEO explores the dramatic rise in ADHD diagnoses and prescriptions, especially among children and young adults. Steven Bartlett invites an expert psychologist to examine whether modern parenting practices and social factors are fueling this increase. Through a candid, science-grounded discussion, they unpack the neurological, emotional, and environmental contributors to ADHD and challenge prevailing models in both diagnosis and treatment.
Key Discussion Points and Insights
1. The Rise of ADHD: Stats and Social Trends
- (00:07) Steven Bartlett contextualizes the discussion with startling statistics:
- ADHD diagnoses in the UK rose 20-fold between 2010–2018.
- Boys (ages 10–16): Diagnoses from 1% to 3.5% in 2018.
- Men (18–29): Nearly 50-fold increase in prescriptions.
- US stats: 15.5M adults and ~1 in 9 children have been diagnosed with ADHD.
- ADHD has exploded in the public discourse and culture.
“I don't know where ADHD was, but the conversation around it... seemed to have really surged into culture in a really, really big way. What's going on?” — Steven Bartlett (00:44)
2. ADHD as a Stress Response, Not a Disorder
- (01:10–06:50) The psychologist reframes ADHD, suggesting it’s less a disorder and more a maladaptive stress response shaped by early experiences:
- Fight-or-flight response, governed by the amygdala, is meant for acute, not chronic stress.
- Early separation from mothers, daycare, or "sleep training" can prematurely activate the amygdala.
- Overactive amygdala in early life leads to long-term regulation problems.
- Chronic stress becomes “hypervigilance” (ADHD traits); when prolonged, leads to “hypovigilance” (depression).
“ADHD...is a stress response. And instead of asking the right questions, which are, okay, what's causing the stress? ... Instead we silence the children's pain, we tell parents, we'll medicate it and we'll just relieve the symptoms. For me, that's malpractice.” — Expert Psychologist (06:21)
- Medication is criticized as a default, symptomatic fix; focus should be on root causes.
3. The “Inconvenient Truth”: Parenting and Environment
- (07:36–09:55) The psychologist asserts family environment is usually the main influence on young children’s stress:
- Parenting decisions, divorce, sibling rivalry, moving, illnesses, and lack of emotional attunement are key stressors.
- Parents should seek therapy/guidance, not rush to medicate.
“When your child gets an ADHD diagnosis, the first thing you should do is go to a therapist who will do Parent guidance with you. Don't rush that child to a psychiatrist to medicate them.” — Expert Psychologist (08:12)
4. Genetics, Sensitivity, and Epigenetics
- (10:58–14:07) Discussion challenges the genetic determinism of ADHD:
- Despite high heritability in twin studies, no direct genetic cause for ADHD, depression, or anxiety found—apart from “sensitivity gene” (short allele on serotonin receptor).
- This gene amplifies stress sensitivity but requires environmental triggers.
- Secure, present parenting can neutralize this predisposition (epigenetics in action).
“If those children... are provided with emotionally and physically present attachment security in the first year, it neutralizes the expression of that gene.” — Expert Psychologist (13:17)
5. Neurology and Subjective Experience
- (14:07–15:12) The show addresses arguments that ADHD is a fixed “brain type”:
- Brain scans show stress sensitivity, not inevitability.
- ADHD correlates with general sensitivity (to noise, touch, separation).
- The psychologist maintains: “Sensitivity is an amazing strength if it's met with sensitivity.” (15:15)
6. Impact and Limitations of Medication
- (16:03–17:18) Medication (stimulants) may have a role, especially when all else fails, but carries risks:
- Can induce anxiety, panic, growth issues, even depression.
- Pressure and expectations on children today are fueling a wider “performance drug” culture instead of root-cause solutions.
“We are a society that likes superficial quick fixes. We like drugs... The truth is that this is not a quick fix. Figuring out...what happened to you as a child...is hard work.” — Expert Psychologist (18:06)
7. Defining Anxiety, Depression, and Social Preoccupations
- (18:43–19:25) Depression = preoccupation with past loss; Anxiety = with future loss. Modern society is obsessed with “loss”—of success, status, and more—over authentic connection.
“We've become very preoccupied with material success. Money, career achievements, fame... We're preoccupied with the wrong things.” — Expert Psychologist (19:41)
8. Socio-Economic & Trauma Factors (“ACE Scores”)
- (20:29–21:32) Steven brings research on “Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACES):”
- Four or more ACEs vastly increase risk of ADHD.
- Stressors: Socioeconomic hardship, divorce, parental mental illness, neighborhood violence, etc., all raise risk.
- Early years' parental presence is the aspect we can control.
9. Parenting & Emotional Regulation: Practical Approaches
- (21:51–25:14) In a memorable exchange, the host and psychologist discuss handling a child’s supermarket meltdown:
- Healthy, emotionally regulated parents produce healthy children.
- First step in discipline: always empathize and acknowledge the child’s feelings before setting limits.
“Acknowledge your child's feelings. That's the first critical—you'd say, Parenting 101, acknowledge your child's feelings.” — Expert Psychologist (23:17)
- Empathy is key in both child and adult relationships.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- On the roots of ADHD:
“ADHD... is a stress response... Instead we silence the children's pain... For me, that's malpractice.” — Expert Psychologist (06:21)
- On genetics and parenting:
“If those children... are provided with emotionally and physically present attachment security in the first year, it neutralizes the expression of that gene.” — Expert Psychologist (13:17)
- On parenting advice:
“An emotionally regulated parent, a healthy parent, produces a healthy child.” — Expert Psychologist (22:21)
- On quick fixes:
“We are a society that likes superficial quick fixes. We like drugs, we like CBT... This is not a quick fix. Figuring out... what caused you to go into fight or flight is hard work.” — Expert Psychologist (18:06)
- On discipline:
“Before you discipline, you always want to be empathic first.” — Expert Psychologist (23:17)
Timestamps for Key Segments
| Time | Segment | |------------|------------------------------------------------| | 00:07–01:10| The surge in ADHD diagnoses and prescriptions | | 01:10–06:50| ADHD as a stress response; neurological discussion | | 07:36–09:55| Parental/environmental responsibility & examples| | 10:58–14:07| Genetics, sensitivity, and epigenetic factors | | 14:07–15:12| "My brain works like this"—subjective/neurology| | 16:03–17:18| Medication pros, cons, and consequences | | 18:43–19:41| Defining anxiety/depression and societal values| | 20:29–21:32| Link between ACE scores and ADHD | | 21:51–25:14| Practical parenting advice—empathy and discipline|
Final Thoughts
The episode provocatively challenges mainstream ADHD narratives, arguing that many modern diagnoses are rooted in stress responses shaped by early relational experiences and societal pressures. The psychologist advocates for self-aware, empathic parenting, early intervention through presence, and caution against knee-jerk reliance on medication, urging listeners to look beyond quick fixes. The conversation is a compelling call to re-examine how our societal and parental choices shape children's mental health for life.
