← The Doula Darcy Podcast
The Doula Darcy Podcast
Why Your Business Thrives When You Thrive
00:19:19
In this episode, Darcy invites you behind the scenes for a candid, inspiring look at how she blends her life and her business — and why it’s essential for every doula (and entrepreneur) to stop separating the two. She shares her recent experiences...
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- [00:04]
A
Welcome to the Doula Darcy podcast. I'm your host, Darcy, a business coach for doulas. And I love helping my fellow doulas master the art of marketing so that they can grow their businesses and help more families. On the podcast, I combine my decade of experience in Advertising with 14 years as a doula to empower other doulas with the marketing strategies and mindset shifts they need to attract more clients and create successful, fulfilling doula careers. Whether you're just starting out as a doula or you're looking to take your doula business to the next level, you're in the right place. Let's go.
- [00:46]
B
All right, so I want today's episode to be a little bit of a week in the life of the doula Darcy, but also talking about how we need to be working on our businesses as much as we need to be working in our businesses. And you know me, I don't really make too much of a distinction between my life and my business. It's all connected. Yes. I'm a mom, I'm a doula, I'm an agency owner, I'm a doula business coach, I'm a friend, I'm a daughter. I'm all these things, and it's just easier when I work on them all at the same time and not try to compartmentalize and keep them all separate. So my business is my life, and my life is my business. And over here in my corner of the Internet and the podcast vibe frequency world, we're working on building businesses that support our life and not the other way around, having a business that drains our life. So what do I mean by all that? I have for the past few days been really working on my business. It started, you all know, I talk about it all the time. I have a business coach. Her name's Amber Lillistrom. And on Thursday, part of my deal with Amber is we're in a group, we're in a mastermind group of other amazing female business owners. None of them are doulas, but they all own their own online businesses. So we have amazing group zoom calls every single month. And then Amber individually coaches us all. And then Thursday, we had the chance to all fly in. I didn't have to fly. I had to drive because it's right down the road from my house. But Amber has this tree house building on her property where she hosts these mastermind retreats for us. And it's a day to just go all in and work on our businesses and work on ourselves. And by working on ourselves, I mean, working on our mindsets, working on our thoughts, our beliefs, what's holding us back, Peeling back all the stuff mentally that's holding us back. So this was a great day. Gosh, good God, I could do a whole podcast episode just about that day. But just, it's so special to have a chance. I was there nine to five, lunch was delivered. Amber was running the whole, organizing the whole day. All I had to do was sit and receive and think and talk and just work through so much. And then Friday, the next day, Amber hosted a live event open to the public in Portsmouth, New Hampshire, called Ignite youe Dream. And this was a like, rock em, sock em, dance til you drop, pump em up, awesome live event. And the coolest part was that one of my clients, Christine Rogers, who actually who's been on this podcast, flew in from Alaska because she's coming to our My Doula Village main retreat next week that kicks off on Monday. And she thought, why don't I just fly in early and come to the Ignite youe Dream event? So it was so fun to have her there. I knew so many people in the room just from being in Amber's world for so long and, ugh, I can't even describe the breakthroughs and just the fun that we had. Let's be real. I was having fun all day. And you know what happens when you let yourself relax and have fun? You have fun. And because your business is your life and your life is your business, it helps your business, it helps your life, it helps everything. When you take good care of yourself, as Amber said at one point throughout one of these two days, like, it's not a good business strategy to treat yourself like crap. And don't we? Maybe it's just me, but I don't think it is. Do we all just tend to treat ourselves like crap? Do we all put ourselves way down at the bottom of the list? We've got clients to take care of. We have parents to take care of, pets, kids, partners, neighbors, bake sales, church groups. If you're a doula listening to this podcast, I'm willing to bet you're caring and nurturing and supporting and doing a lot of good things for a lot of people. Then are you living on granola bars and chips? Are you not sleeping well? Are you drinking five Diet Cokes to get through the day? Like, my point is we do so much for other people and then we turn around and treat our own selves, our own bodies, like absolute garbage. And I'm saying this with Love, because this was my MO for so long and I just. I'm done. I don't do that anymore. I treat myself really well. And this doesn't mean. This is different for everybody. I was gonna say this doesn't mean like designer bags and luxury vacations, but if it does for you, go for it. For me, this just means like slow mornings, this means savoring a cup of tea in the afternoon. This means walking in my yard in the morning barefoot while I drink my coffee, picking up sticks and looking at all the new buds that are growing and going to events like this Ignite youe Dream event, hosting the main doula retreat for the doulas in my doula village and going skiing on a random Wednesday, doing the things I love to do. Because when I do that, it's the whole idea of you have to fill your own cup before you can give to others. And it's taken me a long time to really. I used to say, oh yeah, fill your own cup before you fill others. And. But I. I knew it in my head. I didn't quite know it fully in my body. And it's every year that goes by, I'm getting it more and I'm. It's. Put yourself at the top of the to do list. For me it means like putting my favorite yoga classes with my favorite teachers into my calendar as appointments that I can't miss. No one can book a call. And that would allow me to miss my Friday morning Inferno Pilates class with Emily because that gives me life and makes me feel like I want to die. Thank you, Emily, if you're listening, but I feel so good afterwards. Anyway, so this is my invitation to you to start taking really good care of yourself and giving yourself chances to work on your business. So yes, taking really good care of yourself. Yes, join my doula village and book yourself into the main doula retreat and. Or start small. Take five minutes to savor your favorite hot drink. Smell it. Feel the warm mug. Feel the taste of it. Take five deep breaths and just enjoy the quiet and the stillness. Before you go. Take care of your toddlers, book a massage book lunch with your friend. Figure out what restores your energy the most and do more of that in micro moments of your day, but also in the macro in like your year. What do you need to schedule into your year times that you can work on yourself, on your business? And it is wild to see what comes from that. This started for me when my. It's a whole long story of how I got into this But I. I think my youngest. I have three kids that are all born within four years of each other. And I think My youngest was 2. When I first left them all, I went away. I left them with my mom to go to weddings and stuff, but this was the first time I left for three or four days. And I went to a yoga retreat that was on an island in the ocean. Star island, actually, right here off the coast of Portsmouth, New Hampshire. So it was close to home, but it was. I was. You had to take a boat. And I was so nervous about it. I think I even had to wean my youngest to like make this trip happen. It was so hard to leave my babies. And the first day sucked. I hated it. I was just miserable beating myself up, not enjoying myself. And I finally took me a day and a half to relax into it. And then it just was the most amazing experience for me to have someone else cook my meals out on Star Island. They do this whole family style. Oh, it's just awesome. I love it so much. I loved the experience so much. It was everything. I love. Yoga, ocean, outdoor time. Just beautiful. Anyway, to make a long story short, I started to just be like, if I'm a stay at home, work at home, mom of three little kids, I deserve this yoga retreat every year. And just the way it fell like that was my birthday present to myself every year. It has been on my calendar for 15 years now. I just, I built it into my mom life and it made me a better mom mom. And then I have slowly, over time, worked that into my doula business. There are things throughout the year that I just do, and a lot of them are with my coach, Amber. I go to her Florida retreat every March. I do one of these two. One or two of these treehouse sessions here in New Hampshire with her. I go to her live events. I also book some ski trips. I do the birth worker retreat. I do my own main retreat. So I'm traveling a lot. But now my kids are older and I can. And it's a lot easier. But these are just things I. Those are booked into my calendar and there's nothing that's going to stop me from going. And the same way, on a weekly basis, I have a few. Couple yoga classes that are just booked into my calendar. I try to take a walk every day. There are things I have to do that seem. And it has. I'm sharing this with you because it has taken me so long to get here. I did many years in my corporate career and as an entrepreneur where I was okay, I need to build this email list and start this and do the marketing. Oh, guess what? What the. To make the time to do that, I'm not gonna exercise, I'm not gonna take time to cook healthy food and I'm not gonna go on walks and I'm not gonna go to yoga. I'm just gonna work. And that's just a recipe for burnout, misery and crappy output for your work, basically. And it turns out the more I take exquisitely good care of myself, the better my business does. I hope this plants a little seed wherever you are in the take exceptional care of yourself journey that you start doing this. And again, it can start with five minutes of meditating in the shower or one thing I started with when my kids were little and I felt like I literally did not have one minute to myself. I just, I shaved both legs. I used to joke, ah, my kids won't leave me alone long enough. You can only ever shave one leg at a time in the shower. Like just ask. Here's what it comes down to is believing that you are worthy of this care and then getting over yourself to ask for the support that you need. So for me it was asking my husband to just be like, listen, I need a shower and you need to keep these kids out of that room for a solid 20 minutes or so. Ask for help. I could give you a million examples, but ask for the help you need to be able to take good care of yourself. And there's a million ways you can do this for free. I'm not talking about like spending gobs of money on yourself. Although that's fun too. But first, the first step is these micro movements. Micro. Sorry, I'm getting into my yoga head. These micro tasks through your day and then start to add things in to your week and then start to add things into your month. What's something you do once a month? For me, Massage. I get a massage every month. It's just, it's a non negotiable. It's my favorite thing in the world and it makes me feel so good and I just have to have one every month. And then what can you build into your year? Maybe it's a week long business retreat, maybe it's joining my doula village and coming to Maine with me. Highly suggest that. But maybe it's a day. Maybe it's an afternoon on a summer day. Maybe it's a trip with your family where you're well taken care of. Whatever it is. But building these things into your daily Weekly, monthly and annual calendars. And I promise you will see rewards and benefits that you can't even imagine right now. So I also want to invite you to consider one of the other things that is on my calendar for the year now, for the past. This'll be the third year in January 2026 is the birth worker retreat that I put on with Jodie Condon of Hip to heart and Caitlin McRais of Be Her Village. We're down in Clearwater, Florida for three days in January. And for this little northern New England girl that is. I'm laughing because we literally did this, because I need some sunshine in January. And we were like, our businesses should pay for it. So we started the birth worker retreat. It is truly a retreat. It is. We do have, like, sessions for learning, but they are around your business. This is a conference for doulas, birth workers, lactation consultants, sleep consultants, anyone dealing with people in their perinatal year. But it's not skills, it's not evidence, New evidence, like at typical doula conferences. This is sessions to work on your business, sessions to work on yourself. Meaning like beach walks, free time, two hour lunch blocks, hot tub networking time. And it's just the best. We're at the Wyndham grand in Clearwater, Florida, which is a beautiful hotel. It's right on the beach, and we keep it small so that it's about. We're gonna cap it at 40 doulas, and it's actually getting close to sold out. I think there might be only 10 tickets left, so get in there. Now you can head to thebirthworkerretreat.com snag your spot and come hang out with me in January. And what I especially love about this is besides the sunshine and the community and the fun that we have and the food and the beach and all the things, it's in January, so it's such a great way to kick off your new year with intention, with the chance to, like, recover from the holidays and all that craziness and just have the chance to set some real great intentions for the year ahead. So I hope you'll join me there. Book it now before you start getting those inquiries for those January moms having babies in January 2026. So head to thebirthworkerretreat.com I hope you found this episode helpful.
- [18:38]
A
Thank you for tuning in to the Dula Darcy podcast. I hope you found this episode valuable and I'd love for you to join me on the next one. Let's keep the conversation going. Shoot me a DM on Instagram thedula Darcy or join my free Facebook community, the Doula Marketing Group, where we dive deeper into growing your doula business. If you enjoyed the episode, please take a moment to rate and review the podcast on your favorite platform. Your feedback will help more doula discover the show, which in turn helps more families find the doula support that they need. And I believe that that is how we save the world.