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Ed Mylett
So hey guys, listen. We're all trying to get more productive and the question is, how do you find a way to get an edge? I'm a big believer that if you're getting mentoring or you're in an environment that causes growth, a growth based environment that you're much more likely to grow and you're going to grow faster. And that's why I love Growth Day. Growth Day is an app that my friend Brendan Burchard has created that I'm a big fan of. Write this down growthday.com forward/ed. So if you want to be more productive, by the way, he's asked me, I post videos in there every single Monday that gets your day off to the right start. Got about $5,000, $10,000 worth of courses that are in there that come with the app. Also, some of the top influencers in the world are all posting content in there on a regular basis, like having the Avengers of personal development and business in one app. And I'm honored that he asked me to be a part of it as well and contribute on a weekly basis. And I do. So go over there and get signed up. You're going to get a free tuition, free voucher to go to an event with Brendan and myself and a bunch of other influencers as well. So you get a free event out of it also. So go to growthday.com forward/ed. That's growthday.com ed this episode is brought to you by Progressive Insurance.
John Gordon
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Ed Mylett
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John Gordon
Ed Mylett, you are not just the interviewer today. You're my great friend as well. I love you, brother.
Ed Mylett
I love you.
John Gordon
And I gotta tell you, everywhere I go, people say, you actually know Ed Milette. Are you kidding me? But I just want to honor you for a second. I know you weren't expecting this, but not only are you one of the top three speakers in the world, we always joke about that world class, but. But as an interviewer, the best. Thank you in the world. How many people could say they speak and also interview? I was thinking about you as I was coming over. The best interviews I've ever had are with you.
Ed Mylett
Oh, thank you.
John Gordon
Everyone I talk to experiences the same thing.
Ed Mylett
Thank you.
John Gordon
There's a energy you give. There's a way you ask questions. You're just. It's like the natural. You are so great at this. And I just want to. I just want to acknowledge.
Ed Mylett
I love you, brother. By the way, he teased me about being top three, but he really thinks I'm number one.
John Gordon
Just so you know.
Ed Mylett
Exactly. He knows how sensitive I am to that topic. So I want to really get into this now. By the way, I want you to all lean in here today. You all are building a team. So today we're going to look at it from business mainly and sports, but also you're building a family. And so all of that, to me, is a form Of a team. That's what we do as human beings. And so there's so many things in the book. John's work is unique. And I want to start with something that stood out to me because, you know, this. This notion of commitments as opposed to goals. Goals. Why is that matter? Why is commitment greater than goals?
John Gordon
Everyone has goals. They have a vision for the year. And you and I are big on visions and having dreams and even having goals, they're important. But will your goals take you to where you want to go now? Your commitments will. When you are committed to your goals and you take action and you commit day in and day out, you actually will realize your goals. If you have goals without commitments, that's a vision without execution. Right. You have to take action to realize it. So if you want to be great, you have to be committed to what you're doing. If you want to be a great team, you have to have commitments as a team in order to be great. I asked the team the other day, I was with a professional baseball team, and I said, how many of you have your goals written down? And most of the guys had their goals written down. I said, how many have your commitments written down? Yeah, no one had their commitments written down. And then we wrote down their commitments. It's a different conversation.
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
My commitment is to recovery. My commitment is to eating healthy during the course of the season so I stay healthy. My commitment is to actually showing up and preparing more or watching film in order to get better. So there's a commitment that then leads you to being your best.
Ed Mylett
So is the commitment. I want to dig deeper on that. So. Because I'm going to steal it from you. So if I have a goal, you're saying the commitment delivers on that goal. Help us break it down like in our own life. Like, if someone's building a company right now and the goal is, you know, we're going to reach a million dollars in sales this year, and you're going to make $100,000 a year. Help us work through what would the commitment part. If you were working with that company, what would. How would you help them delineate and distinguish what the commitment part is?
John Gordon
I would identify what our goals are. So first I would say, actually, what's our vision? Okay, what do we want to be? Then I would talk about the why. Why do we want to do that? What is our purpose? We don't get burned out because of what we do. We get burned out because we forget why we do it. So why is essential. Vision is Essential. And then, okay, what is our goals? What numbers do we want to achieve? What kind of outcomes do we want? So now we have these goals, we have these outcomes. Okay, what are our commitments? Sales. How many calls we're going to make every single day. Customer service. How we show up for our customers, how will we serve them, make them feel special. How we can be committed to each other in the course of that year in terms of working together and honoring each other and being there for each other and sacrificing for each other, supporting each other. How will we do that as a team? So, so every team has to make these commitments to realize these goals. But you got these numbers and then each department will have the commitments to achieve those numbers.
Ed Mylett
It's really interesting those of you that are listening, by the way, the great thing about John, when he comes on and he has a book, he'll just tell you the book because he knows you're going to go read it anyway. A lot of authors like, I'll give you a little piece, you know, and the reason the interviews are so good with you is because you're so forthcoming with the information. And I'm, you and I were talking before you got here today that I'm on this sort of kick to get my physical body back in shape. So I've got a dramatic weight loss goal that I've got, really wanted to get down to my college weight and so I've got that goal. But to your point, it's my day to day commitments about when I'm eating, what I'm eating, when I do my cardio, when I do my stretching and lifting. It's the commitments that I'm sort of obsessed with. Now that I think about. It's kind of been my formula for achievement. I'm like a commitment freak when it comes to getting things done.
John Gordon
You really are like, you are next level in your commitments and you inspired me to work out. Like every day I work out now every day I'm walking, I'm exercising, I'm eating right. Those commitments on a daily basis actually lead to the results that you haven't wanted. 54, I feel better than ever.
Ed Mylett
You look great.
John Gordon
Yeah, you look great too. But I would not be looking great if I didn't meet you.
Ed Mylett
Thank you.
John Gordon
And I did not get committed to my health, to my weight. So I, I think commitments and weight and health are probably the best examples of, of scene in action. Because everyone, okay, I have this goal of losing weight or this goal of getting fit. And then I know my Commitments to eating healthy will, will get me there. If I eat that chocolate cake every day, that's not being committed.
Ed Mylett
Right, Exactly. By the way, I know it sounds like we compliment each other a lot, you guys, is because we, we really have a mutual affection. But like in my case, my faith is what's grown, which is far more important than what I've helped you with with your physical part. My walk with Jesus is really improves and grown and I attribute a lot of that to knowing you. And one of the reasons is, is I see how committed you are to certain things like your faith walks and being in scripture and things like that. So these are day to day commitments I've now made that have really changed those things. And it's modeling you.
John Gordon
Can we talk about prayer for a second, please?
Ed Mylett
I'd love to because what you just.
John Gordon
Said is so profound and so important because I have recently been more committed to prayer. So every morning I'm now walking and I am praying. I'm trying to get couples to pray together because if you pray together, 99% stay together. Research is clear on this. So couples who pray together are more likely to stay together and have a better marriage. So if you can commit to prayer in your relationship, in your marriage, you will elevate your relationship. If you can commit to prayer in your own life, you'll actually find more healing, more peace, and more power. So I take these walks of prayer now. Every single day I go through that prayer acronym of praise, repent, ask, yield, expect, receive. By the time I'm done, I feel better if I don't commit to that action on a daily basis. I do not have the feeling, the outcome and the healing and the power that I'm now living with as a result of that.
Ed Mylett
Oh, boy. All right, we're going to go personal on you now. Since we're in this lane, let's go a little layer deeper. You probably wonder, how does a guy who used to own bars end up writing 30 books and sell millions of books? And I would say it particularly in the sports space, but even beyond that leadership, faith like is known as the guy in that space. Right? How does that happen? This guy's doing bars, everybody. Okay. Right. This is not. And he wasn't, by the way, a Christian many, many years ago.
John Gordon
Was not.
Ed Mylett
What are the commitments and practices? So this is a really cool part. I know how it happens. Tell them how this book came to you. How does it got. You ever think about that? Like, how am I going to get. How do I do it again? If you ever given a speech, you've made a post on where's the next one going to come from? Tell them where basically these books come from. But since we're talking about the seven commitments of a great team, tell them how this book came to you and how you wrote it, because I think this is very telling. Commitment wise and habit wise.
John Gordon
Well, I'm 54 years old now. I've been. I feel like I've been writing this book my entire life, because I've been on teams my entire life. Going back to college, being a lacrosse player and wanting to be a great lacrosse player, had to be committed to getting better, committed to pursuing excellence, committed to practicing and elevating my game, my mindset, all of that. But I did not have a great mindset back then. That's the funny thing. My teammates cannot believe what I'm doing now.
Ed Mylett
You're the positive guy.
John Gordon
They're like, you're the positive. You were a mental wreck in college. I remember you going, no, why is this happening?
Ed Mylett
Why am I injured again?
John Gordon
Like, I was a mental wreck. I really was. And. But I. But I had this great coach, Coach Moran, and Richie Moran was. Was the best. He believed in me, he recruited me, he brought me to Cornell, and he gave me a shot. And I'll never forget him for that. And I'll never forget him believing in me and the way he loved me. And beyond college, like, after graduating, was still involved in my life. He wasn't just my coach for four years, he was my coach for the rest of my life. And so about a month before he passed away, I gave him a call and we were talking and he said, remember, John, teammates are forever. Teammates are forever. And I couldn't get that out of my head.
Ed Mylett
It's in the book.
John Gordon
Yeah, it was for a couple years. That's the beginning of the book. And I knew I wanted to write about a coach that impacted a player, but also a team that impacted each other. A team that was committed together because of their coach and because of each other. And this book is a embodiment of all the principles, all the ideas, all the lessons I learned as an athlete, but also all the work I've done with teams along the way. So. And I walk every day, and while I'm walking, I pray. And all my books have come to me during that time. And this book came to me on a walk. I'm walking and praying, and boom, I got seven commitments of a great team. I didn't have all the commitments, but I knew that was the title. And then I started to think about what those commitments were, what truly makes a great team, and I began writing them down. It's got to be about staying positive. That's one. Definitely. A great team stays positive together. You have to commit to the vision and mission. I knew that was one. And so as I was writing these down and walking, more and more of the story came to me. The ideas came to me. I wrote this book, Ed, in 16 days.
Ed Mylett
Gosh.
John Gordon
Now people often think, well, 16 days, it can't be a good book. My son said I shouldn't tell people with 16 days.
Ed Mylett
Incredible.
John Gordon
But I actually think it was so magical in writing this because I was walking and praying.
Ed Mylett
It was a divine download.
John Gordon
It was. It just flowed like. Like no other. It's never taken me that short of a time to write a book. But 16 days, I had this book, and when I read it, I literally cried as I read the audiobook of it because it's so special, so impactful, so meaningful. In terms of the story, what happens, People will read it. They're going to be inspired, they're going to be encouraged. They may cry a little bit, but they're also going to realize, wow, I could be a more committed team member and I can get my team committed. Can't wait for people to read it.
Ed Mylett
Me, too. And by the way, you guys, John's writing style is unique just to him. It's why it's so easy to read and takes you on this journey. And I remember the day. I don't know if you know this, but the day you took the walk, that night, you called me or texted me and said, I just got my book.
John Gordon
Yeah.
Ed Mylett
Then I just want you all to know that's where the strategy comes from. So we're talking about prayer, we're talking about having rituals, we're talking about his. Is that what basically is a prayer walk? Imagine that. Get a download like that in your life. What if it was your next business idea, your next concept, your next thought, your next strategy? So it was awesome, brother.
John Gordon
And I got the next two others from a prayer walk. And I want to thank you also for reading it. You were one of the first to read this book and gave me feedback. Really meant the world to me.
Ed Mylett
Thank you, brother. You guys all hear that? Like, that's a long road, by the way. But I want you to understand it for this reason. Like, first off, if you'd have froze when he was bartending and I said, hey, you'll be one of the most prolific authors in the world 20 years from now, everyone would have laughed at you, right? Laughed and thought it was crazy. And then also, you know, many of you have a dream, you know, you're going to have to stabilize your life to some extent before you jump in and pursue that dream. Most people aren't willing to do the grind work to get to the good stuff. They want to be planted in the dream immediately, not do the stuff that's required of you to get into a position. When I started my business, I'll just tell you all this. When I started my business, it didn't go well in the very beginning and I had to go stock shelves at night. It's Safeway. I was. I'd stock shelves all night long, get a couple hours of sleep, put my suit back on and go do business all day long until I could find a way. But what I wasn't going to do was quit on my dream altogether. If you really want it bad, your obsessions become your possessions and you'll eventually possess them. So, hey guys, I want to jump in here for a second and talk about change and growth. And you know, by the way, it's no secret how people get ahead in life or how they grow. And also taking a look at the future, if you want to change your future, you got to change the things you're doing. If you continue to do the same things, you're probably going to produce the same results. But if you get into a new environment where you're learning new things and you're around other people that are growth oriented, you're much more likely to do that yourself. And that's why I love Growth Day. Write this down for a second. Growthday.com forward/ed. My friend Brenda Burchard has created the most incredible personal development and business app that I've ever seen in my life. Everything from goal setting software to personal accountability journaling courses. Thousands of dollars worth of courses in there as well. I create content in there on Mondays where I contribute as do a whole bunch of other influencers like the Avengers of influencers and business minds in there. It's the Netflix for high achievers or people that want to be high achievers. So go check it out. My friend Brennan's made it very affordable, very easy to get involved. Go to growthday.com ed that's growthday.com ed this episode brought to you by Progressive Insurance. Do you ever find yourself playing the budgeting game? Shifting a little money here, a little there, hoping it all works out well with the name your Price tool from Progressive, you can get a better budgeter and potentially lower your insurance bill too. You tell Progressive what you want to pay for car insurance and they'll help find you options within your budget. Try it today@progressive.com Progressive Casualty Insurance Company and affiliates Price and coverage match limited by state law. Not available in all states. Here's the deal with the news. I just don't think you know what's true. If you really listen to one sort of a channel and you lean a particular way, they're going to feed you all the things that you already believe, right? If you go to the other channel, everybody's the bad guy there and you're going to hear all the news there. Everything has spin. Today it's really difficult. I'll listen to a story like, oh my gosh, they're completely doing this. Then you hear the backstory on another channel. You're like, wait a minute, that's totally not true. Everywhere we look, there's spin in the news. It's unbelievable. So if you want to be more aware of where your news is coming from, welcome to Ground News. It helps cut through all the spin and clutter and noise. Ground News gathers related articles from around the world in one place with context about the source's political leaning, reliability and ownership. Go to ground news.com mylet today they get 40% off the ground News Vantage plan and get access to all of their news analysis features. That's ground news.com for 40 off the ground News Vantage plan for a limited time only. Ground news.com mylet all right, let's get back to the book a little bit. I want to get back to the book. So the second commitment in the book, he has these seven commitments, right? I'm going to give you a few of them today. One of them is staying positive. And I was like, oh, John Gordon, the positive guy. That's pretty basic stuff, but in the real world, okay, once pressure hits, once failure hits, once setbacks hit, it's very easy in a company, in a family like you and Catherine during that difficult time, start pointing fingers. No, it's your fault. No, it's your fault. No, it's you. Well, if you would just do this, then I could do that. And that happens in a locker room as well, right? Like a guy drops a fly ball. Every very easy to get negative. Someone misses their assignment, doesn't practice, doesn't show up in. In business, same thing. Like, you know, when a problem comes, the normal CEO, the average one, who's to blame rather than solving the problem. How do you stay positive? That's easy in the good times. That commitment. How does someone stay committed? And I guess if it's a commitment, it's different than we should when the she shits the fan.
John Gordon
It's important to know that the collective belief and optimism of a team is made up of each person's belief and optimism. So each person says, I'm going to stay positive for myself and for my team. I'm going to feed myself in order to feed others on my team. And then collectively, we make a decision, we make a commitment. This is why this is in the book, A commitment that we will stay positive through challenges, through adversity, through setbacks. Everyone's positive during training camp because you're undefeated. Everyone's positive in the beginning of the year, usually because you're just getting started. But. But as we move on and we face adversity, as you said, we face setbacks, we face challenges. How do we respond to the adversity? Do we stay positive through it? Now, here's what I know. Being positive won't guarantee you'll succeed, but being negative will guarantee you well. And so often what we believe determines what we create. I went up to speak to the commanders before the playoff series against the playoff game against the Tampa Bay Buccaneers this year. And I went up there and I talked about the power of belief, brotherhood, and bu. And I said, listen, guys, you believe. And that's where you are right now, because of your belief. You're here because of your belief. But every team must rise higher in the belief as we reach new levels, we get new devils, new challenges. So your belief must rise higher, individually and collectively. And that belief of a team that staying positive through adversity will define the kind of success you have. So every team's going to get tested. How do we respond to the test? That's key. Every family will be tested. Every marriage will be tested. I think too many people give up when they face the challenge. Too many give up when they face that setback. And because it's hard, they give up. No, we're not supposed to give because it's hard. We're supposed to stay focused and positive and stay encouraged to overcome the discouragement that makes us give up the positive thing.
Ed Mylett
I want to stay on it for a sec. Why? I think this matters. Let's set sports aside. Let's just do, like, personal relationship for a second. Okay. You're building a family. That's hard when. When. When you're really in that disagreement phase. To stay positive. You and I both struggle with that. You know that it's not easy for either one of us. But one of the reasons that it's so important and I want you to talk about this, it's not in the book I want us to talk about it is the damage done when you're not, that can become irreversible. So if you're building a company, for example, and it's gone bad and the leader, because I've done it, doesn't stay positive and attacks, accuses, blames, and if you're not careful, you can say something in those moments in the difficult dark times in your company or in your marriage or to your children, that is unforgettable. And although your relationship may get better, it'll never be the same one it was before you said those things in the negative. Does that make sense? And so let's just unpack that a little bit. I want your thoughts on that. Because stay positive.
John Gordon
Right.
Ed Mylett
The ramifications of not at least attempting to trend in that direction can ruin a long term business relationship. They can alter the direction and the destiny of a personal relationship as well. My opinion, if you don't at least have a commitment that we're going to try to stay positive and stay out of the negative.
John Gordon
Yeah. As a relationship, as a family, as a, as a business, I do a lot of work in positive leadership. My mission is to develop positive leaders who make a positive impact in every business, school, team, organization and community. Now people think positive leadership is about hunky dory and being kind all the time and generous. No, positive leaders are demanding, they're just not demeaning. And there'll be moments when we need to be demanding, but we can't be demeaning. There'll be moments when we are frustrated, but we can't allow our frustration to cause us to say things that we wish we didn't say so often. We do it because we're activating the reptilian part of our brain. And if you know anything about a reptile, it will never love you. It's all about survival. Well, when you're in survival mode and you're activating the reptile, it actually hijacks the rational part of the brain called cortical inhibition. So it hijacks it. And you say things you wish you didn't say, you act in ways you normally wouldn't act. And so it's actually the reptile. But it only works once as an excuse, like my reptile ate this positive dog part of the brain is what I call it and only works once as an excuse. And. And the key is to know that, okay, just really be intentional. Know that you have a quarter second at every moment. A quarter second to override the reptile with what I call the positive dog, the loving, rational kind part of your brain. And you have that quarter second. So we have to just slow down, take a deep breath, and be intentional. And there have been moments when I wanted to say something and I didn't. Maybe a better leader in that moment. There have been times when I said things I wish I didn't say, and you can't take it back, as you said.
Ed Mylett
Yep.
John Gordon
You can only apologize afterwards. And as a leader, too true. There are moments that you do need to ask for forgiveness and apologize. There have been moments with my kids where I said, you know what I said that I'm sorry. It was in the heat of the moment. I wish I didn't say that. Can you forgive me? And you're right. They'll never forget you saying that. And there are moments I'll be driving or walking and thinking, God, why did I say that?
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
God, I wish I didn't do that. God, I wish I was a better person then like I am now. We also have to give ourselves grace, some grace, and know that it's not who we were, it's who we're becoming. And along the way, no one is perfect. We all have flaws.
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
And I think if the kids that you have see your flaws, but they know you're working and getting better, that allows them to see that they're not perfect, too. And they can get better as well, by the way.
Ed Mylett
Which is commitment four in the book Committing to Get Better.
John Gordon
Right.
Ed Mylett
I gave a talk a couple weeks. No, I was actually getting interviewed a few weeks ago. The guy's like, well, you're just a leadership guru, and you built these businesses and podcasts and stuff. And I said, I'm going to be really honest with you. And it was just, I'm. The older I get, the more I'm just brutally honest in front of groups, too. And I said, I've become pretty convinced I'm not that great of a leader. The older I get. The older I get, the more I realize what. I don't know, maybe just a skosh of humility sets into my life. The more I'm. I wasn't a great leader. I was a inspirational leader, but I wasn't a great leader. I could have treated people better. I could have been more patient. I could have been more tactical. I could have spent more time. There's just so many things, and I'm not a great leader. But I do want to get better, and I'm committed to getting better. And I've been committed to getting better for quite some time. And so when you first gave me the copy of the book, which was many, many months ago, it was. And I'm like, commitment to getting better, man. I don't know which one's the most important commitment. But for me, if we can have a commitment in our family or in our company, right. Or in our team, I'm going to get better. I'm always trying to get better, and I know that's your intent. To me, that opens up a lot of room for grace and a lot of room for growth. So I just want you to talk about that.
John Gordon
I see it all the time. I am not the best leader either. It's ironic. I'm the best at helping leaders become better. Like, that's what I'm great at, helping a leader build their team. I believe I've worked with more leaders and helped them build more teams than just about anybody on the planet. So great at that. But I am not a great leader. And I say it all that, which is ironic to me. I'm not a great leader. I watch these leaders, I work with these leaders, and I go, man, they are great. You spend time with Dabo Sweeney. Like, he is a great leader.
Ed Mylett
I was just saying that to Zach Johnson a couple weeks ago. I ran into my go, let's talk about Dabo. I don't know if there's a better leader anywhere.
John Gordon
Spend time with Sean McVeigh, Rate Leader. So Corey, close. Great leader. Alan Mulally, who turned around Ford and Boeing. Spend time with him. Great leader. I'm not that kind of leader. But. But the goal, as you said, is to always get better. And my team the other day actually said to me, john, we know you're working at it. We can tell because you write about positive leadership. This is your mission. And we know you struggle, but we can tell you are really working at it and actually putting your own principles into practice, how to do it. During COVID I lost 100 of my business during COVID In three days. Yeah, three days. That was a tough time. Let's talk about commitment.
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
Putting this into practice. And I'm walking around the house going. Every text was coming in, canceling one more event after another. I was like, darn it. Darn it. Next day, I'm like, damn, damn. Next Day, I'm like, shit. Next day, fuck. I don't know if you can say that on podcast, but, you know, the positive guy said, the positive guy. Oh, yeah. And my wife goes, it's gonna be okay, John. I said, no, it's not. It's not, John. It's gonna be okay. Go. No, no, we're done. Like, we're losing everything. She goes, aren't you the guy that writes these positive books? Don't you tell everyone how to stay positive? Like, yeah. She goes, you know, follow your own advice. I made a decision in that moment, a commitment that I was gonna stay positive and get better during that time, during COVID it was a defining moment in my life to get better and to stay positive during that time. Got my team to do the same. And we started putting out a lot of positive messages to the world. Talked to a guy the other day, a new client. He said, we had 500 people during that time. They were reeling. They were in deep trouble. They started listening to my messages that I was putting out there because I made that commitment. He said, john, it was huge for us. We stayed positive. We now have 3,500 employees thrive and doing better than ever. The commitment to stay in posit and get better. So to getting better, we all have something we need to improve upon. And here's the thing about getting better. Like, we're not always going to be at 100%. I know that you're not at 100% right now. I'm at 100%. We're always dealing with something, but we can always give 100% of what we have. So even if you're at 70%, give 100% of the. Give 100% of what you have in that moment, that day.
Ed Mylett
It's very good.
John Gordon
Give your best in order to get better. And then every day as a team, ask, what are we doing well? What can we do better? And what are we learning that will make us better? If we ask those three questions every single day as a team, individually and collectively, we will get better as a team. You just got to ask those questions. And then as a team, you have to challenge each other. There are times when you have to call your friend up and say, hey, I don't see you being your best. I don't see you getting better. Here's what I noticed. Here's what I believe you can do. And you encourage, but also challenge your teammates, your friends and others in order to get better. We need people going to speak truth in our lives to get better. And great teammates. Great teammates speak truth to each other in love in order to help each other get better.
Ed Mylett
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John Gordon
Yeah.
Ed Mylett
It's interesting that you walk into these very masculine locker rooms with a message about love. Yeah, Right. And so it was literally probably at the core of what I wanted to get to today. And you just said it. So there's seven commitments of a great team, guys. But this concept overall, his philosophy involving love. So if I say the term love to you, you would say what? As it comes to building teams and elevating performance, great teams love each other.
John Gordon
And because you love each other, you're going to serve and sacrifice for each other. Love is about being sacrificial. That's real love.
Ed Mylett
Sacrificial.
John Gordon
It's going to cost you something. Commitment's going to cost you something. You're going to have to give your time, your energy, your effort, a piece of you. Something maybe you want that the team actually needs. And maybe the team. The need of the team is more important than what you want. So you're gonna have to sacrifice time, energy, effort, money, something for your team and for others. So there's going to be a sacrifice. And when you love your team, team, and you love the people that you're living with that love your family and you love who you're working with, you're going to give to them. So every day when you're committing to your team, you have to ask yourself, what am I willing to give? And also what am I willing to give up? Because sometimes you may have to give up something for your team. It might be. It might be your ego. It might be playing time. It might be a higher salary, as Tom Brady did to lower salary for his team. It might be a position in a company. You want that promotion. But right now, your team needs you to be in this role. And so you have to stay in that role. Whatever may be, there's going to be a sacrifice to be a great team member and to be a great team. So I think love is sacrifice. I also hear it all the time. Every time a team wins a championship, what do they say? We loved each other.
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
We cared about each other. It's always about relationship. And when you know that there's love, there's also trust, and then there's commitment. And because there's commitment, you're willing to fight for each other. You're willing to go to battle together. You will sacrifice for each other. So a big part of this book is committing to each other. Yeah. You commit to the vision and mission. Yes, you can commit to staying positive, but committing to each other. Like, you and I, Ed, are going to battle. Like, I know this. Like, I would commit to you in a heartbeat, and I would fight for you and the friend you've been for me. I will die for you.
Ed Mylett
Likewise.
John Gordon
I would. I know that. I know that about you, too. That is, to me, that's. That's real commitment. That's real friendship. That's a real bond. That's real trust, and that leads to real high performance and real success. So. So you show me a team that loves each other, I'll show you a team that's stronger and willing to go into the battle. So it's not soft like I always tell teams. Love the battle.
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
Love competing against your competition. Love the moment and commit to the person in front of you. Commit to your team. Commit to the moment that you're in. In that moment, if you do that right, you'll rise higher. You'll help your team rise higher. So. So it's all about the love we bring. And the great thing about love is also it casts out fear. So the minute you focus on love, fear dissipates. So if fear is your enemy, which it is, and fear is holding you back, how do you counter fear? How do you overcome fear? It is through love. So the more we focus on love, fear has no power over you.
Ed Mylett
Gosh, you know how right he is, you guys. By the way, just think about that. In your business right now or the team you're building, do they really deeply know how much you love them? And do you have commitments like this? Like, don't just casually. You're driving in your car, you're on the treadmill, you're on your walk. Ah, it's good information. Process it through your own life. We go to a new dentist here in town. When you walk into this place, in fact, most of the ladies that are in that office actually came and saw me speak, which, you know, probably helped me be number three in the world, according to you. And top three.
John Gordon
I'm not saying you're not number one, but.
Ed Mylett
So. But every time I go in this place, this is so strange to say about a dentist place. You ever walk in a business so you just feel love?
John Gordon
Yeah.
Ed Mylett
Regardless of what it is. It could be a sandwich shop, a pizza place. It could be a dry cleaners. It's my dentist. These women love each other. There's a. I'm sure it's set by the tone of the leader, the way they care for one another. They're all very different, too. I can tell Their backgrounds are different. I actually like going to the dentist, which is rare. It's rare. And it's just. There's a loving environment. They treat you loving. They treat one another loving. It's just. Do you have that? You go, well, it doesn't really fit. I'm in the day trading business. Yes, it does. Yes, it does. It does. And if you don't have that, you're missing one of the commitments of a great team. You're missing an element that could cause you to go to the next level. This is not casual. Okay. This is it. Nito Cobain. What's his name?
John Gordon
Nito.
Ed Mylett
Okay. He's a leader that I know that you admire John Maxwell. And, and he's, he's actually, I had him come speak to our firm before, many, many years ago. So I want to ask you a question. You've mentioned him to me as someone that you really admire as a leader. You've mentioned Dabo Sweeney, who is the coach, football coach at Clemson, everybody, if you're not a sports fan. And he's mentioned Sean McVeigh. He's mentioned coaches that a lot of you wouldn't know by name. Okay. Sean McVay is the coach of the Rams. I happen to have met all of these people as well. For you, what's the through line with the. Just take those three. What's the through line? So that if I say that to you, great leader, what are you thinking? You know what? Dabo has that Sean also has that Nito has. What? What is the through line? I can tell you what it is for me after you answer.
John Gordon
Really?
Ed Mylett
Yes. And it'll be different than yours.
John Gordon
It's who they are. It's. It's their character, it's their integrity. It's their, their essence. There's an essence about them and they all believe bigger. They all have a massive vision of what they want to accomplish. They also have confidence in this vision and mission. I mean, Nito Cabane turned around High Point from a little podunk university to a national powerhouse and well respected university. There's not many people in the world that could actually do that. Pretty incredible. Dabo Sweeney turned Clemson, which, which is a good team, but they weren't huge at the time, into a national powerhouse. No one expected that he could do that and he did that shammy. They comes in to the Rams and turns around the Rams.
Ed Mylett
True.
John Gordon
If I had to pick though, like, it would be belief in optimism. Like they all have this incredible belief in optimism. Obviously that's my, my core Message. It's. It's ultimately what I strive to be.
Ed Mylett
Yep.
John Gordon
It's what I love talking about. I see that in them. There's. There's a belief. There's a belief that we can transfer this belief to others. And when we transfer it to others, they accomplish more than they ever thought possible.
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
And I always think we see in others what we want to see in ourselves or what we actually know we can be or want to be. And for me, I love being an encourager. I love watching people accomplish more after working with them. I love seeing them rise higher. I know you do as well. So seeing people accomplish more. So. So I love leaders who believe in the vision, the dream, and also believe in others to accomplish it.
Ed Mylett
Character. Is that the root of all leadership? And you know the three of them better than I do. So really closely correlated. Just. Just a takeaway for everybody. All three of them have unbelievably infectious energy. There's an energy when you're around a great leader that you feel something that you don't. When you're around an average one. There's an energy.
John Gordon
Yeah.
Ed Mylett
When you're around Dabo, you feel something. Sean has a very similar energy, by the way, to Davos. It's. It's. It's high, I guess. It's positive. It's intense. Dabos is slightly different.
John Gordon
Yes.
Ed Mylett
And even, you know, when he spoke, I mean, he was already a. He wasn't a young man when he spoke. Like, this guy's energy level, his enthusiasm is. It's. It's contagious. Energy is contagious. And John's probably most famous book, until this one, it's called the Energy Bus. And so I have to tell you that when you're a leader of a team, I think one of the. If there was an eighth or ninth commitment, it would be to high energy. It would be to making people feel something when they're around you and being intentional about this energy, feeling it. Like, you can't create great energy unless it's actually an outcome of yours. It's actually something you're focused on, is pouring energy into people. So that's one of the things I would take for them. It's one of the things, like when I think of friends of mine that I love, like, you like it, just great energy. Like, I feel energy from you. I feel like loving and belief and wisdom. That's the energy I feel. You're always making people feel something, and most people are oblivious to that fact. They're more oblivious. They're more about. Well, I made this speech or I said this. These are our six tactics. These are our core values. All that's great.
John Gordon
What do you make people feel going to speaking? People tell me all the time when you speak, man, he just made me feel a certain way. I know when I speak, it's the energy that people feel. Positive energy may not even be the best speaker, may not even have said the best thing that day. And yet when you smile as a speaker, when you are contagious, when there's an essence, when people know you care about them and you're there to serve them and add value to them, they feel your energy. You just. You just woke something up in me in a big way.
Ed Mylett
Yeah.
John Gordon
And it really is in the energy bus. I wrote about energy contagious and enthusiasm. I wrote that book so long ago, I forgot. But it is, like, essential, I guess, the energy you bring to your team. And I think that's why so many leaders in business and sports and nonprofits and healthcare have resonated with the energy bus, because they all know we need to bring energy to our organization, to our company, to our customers, to our community. And it's the energy you bring. You are energy.
Ed Mylett
Thank you.
John Gordon
I am energy. Right. And every day. What kind of energy are we? Brilliant.
Ed Mylett
It's when you see a leader in their prime compared to when they're past it. You look at videos of Steve Jobs in his prime, there was an energy of vibration to the guy that was incredible. When you look at your favorite political figure as a president in their prime, their best moments, they bring a particular energy that you feel. And I think it's one of these invisible things that's got to be a commitment that you make to your point in the book.
John Gordon
But why do they lose it? That's. As you're saying that, Ed, I'm thinking.
Ed Mylett
Like what you said earlier in the interview, they forget why. Yeah.
John Gordon
Why do you lose it? Because John Masso, we know, at 77, still has the energy.
Ed Mylett
Because I don't think. I think his calling is so high. It's got to do with the kingdom that he's never forgotten why you said this in the very beginning. Here is one of the first sentences you said, is that when you forget why, when you forget why you started your purpose and your reason, and the longer you're a leader, you're carrying. Here's the thing, everybody. This may be one of the most important things you're ever going to hear. A leader's job is to carry the emotional burden of the company, of the business, and of the family. If you're the leader of your family and what falls on you, the emotional load, it just does. And usually in a marriage, it falls on one of the two. Doesn't mean a marriage isn't 50, 50, but the emotional load, you know exactly what I mean. Falls on usually one of you. I'm sure it's great. And 50, 50 and all that. If you're the leader of a company or a business or a team, it's the emotional burden. It's the emotional load. It never leaves you, right? If you're a leader of anything, that's the case. And so over time, you get leadership fatigue. If you don't have new whys and a real reason for why you it. Because here's the truth. In life, people hurt you, they let you down, they screw you, they lie to you. This is just a fact. That's the enemy trying to get you off of your mission. He's trying to get you doubting, discouraged, delusional, so you'll delay. Those are the Ds. You have your Ds, right? We've talked about this a million times. And all of this work sort of together is like leaders get fatigue. It's just the emotional burden. And if you don't have a really huge purpose, eventually it just gets heavy. And it. And by the way, it's subtle. A leader doesn't go from like a level 10, unbelievable to a 2. They go from a 10. Everyone listening knows exactly what I'm. To like an 8.2. Most people would never notice you're not the leader you used to be. It's invisible. But you know, you know, it's. You just don't want it quite as bad as you did when you were younger, quite as bad as when you were broke, quite as bad as before you won the first championship. It's subtle. You don't go from 10 to 1. You go from 10 to 10.3 or 8.3.
John Gordon
It's just subtle.
Ed Mylett
But if you're not careful, 8.3 turns into 7.2, and three years later you're at a 6.1, and all of a sudden you can't even remember that person that was the vibrational leader. And that's why we admire these people.
John Gordon
I think, and I think both of us are saying, which is a great conversation for us to talk about, everyone to hear, how do we stay that way? How do we keep the fire alive?
Ed Mylett
What would you say?
John Gordon
Passion, the burning alive? Well, I would say what you Walk. And said to me, the crime is not that the passion has run out, is that you stayed around after it did. And I would say, guess what? Don't let it run out. I would say, find your why? Find a new mission, a new vision. Everyone needs three things. We need a mission, a team, and a scoreboard to keep us going. So. So what is your new mission? You retire. Find a new mission. You lost an old mission. Find a new mission. I don't care what is. Find a mission that wakes you up every day and excites you. And it's usually not going to be about you. It's usually going to be about an impact that you can make, a legacy you can leave. And that ultimately is what will drive us in the long run. I wake up every day more fired up than ever, more now than ever, because I have this new mission and vision of developing positive leaders around the world. That's what's getting me going. I would say find your team. You got to find a team that's going to encourage you, support you, be there for you. That will hold you accountable, that will give you life. Because think about every day you're waking up when you're working for a company, working for your own business even, and you got a mission and you got this team that you're working with and you're going to battle every single day. And perhaps you sell the company now, you no longer have that team, or perhaps you retired, no longer have the team, or maybe you got fired, no longer have a team. You got to find a team right now. That is your squad. That is your crew. You lift each other up, and then you got to have that scoreboard. What are we chasing? What progress do we want to make? You're speaking at all these incredible events now with a life search. I love that. And you're telling me, hey, we. We just impacted 800 souls and just 500 souls the other day. A thousand here. I'm blown away when I hear that. And that number means something to me and it means something to you. There's a number even at that level, even with about souls, we still want to know that we're having progress and impact. So have your scoreboard.
Ed Mylett
Amen.
John Gordon
And that progress that you're measuring along the way. And we're actually going to create our own scoreboard now of how many leaders have we developed? And we're starting that now, and hopefully the next 20, 30 years we'll be able to measure that and see how many leaders we've developed.
Ed Mylett
I love that The Range Rover Sport blends power, poise and performance with a design that's distinctly British. Free from unnecessary details, raw power and agility shine in the Range Rover Sport. To truly make an impact, you need to take the lead. You need to adapt to whatever comes your way. And when you're that driven, you drive an equally determined vehicle, the Range Rover Sport. Like you, it was designed to make an impact. The Range Rover Sport combines a dynamic sporting personality, elegance and agility to deliver a truly distinctive drive. The assertive stance of the Range Rover Sport hints at its equally refined driving performance. Defining true modern luxury, the Range Rover Sport includes the latest innovations in comfort and convenience. Use the cabin air purification system alongside active noise cancellation for all new levels of quality, comfort and control. A force inside and out, Range Rover Sport was created with a choice of powerful engines. Engines including a plug in hybrid with an estimated range of 53 miles. Build your Range Rover Sport at range rover.com us/sport. There's a part of the book that I, I that, that you talk about that I won't let the interview end because I just think it's a unique perspective. So a lot of people listen like, my team's not disciplined. We're not disciplined. I can't get them disciplined. I can't get them doing what they need to be doing. And you have this correlation in the book between devotion and discipline. This guy's like, just let this sink in right here, let this settle in. This is real brilliance to me.
John Gordon
This is my favorite concept, I believe, because so many coaches out there, so many leaders, like, I want my team to be disciplined and they're yelling at them, be disciplined. And as parents, we were yelling at our kids, be disciplined. But it's not discipline that actually drives us, it's devotion. When you're devoted to something and you truly love it, discipline is a whole lot easier. No one had to make Tom Brady work on his passing. He was devoted to his craft, and because he was devoted to it, that drove his discipline. So if you're trying to be disciplined without devotion, which many of us do, it's like we're swimming upstream, climbing uphill. It's really hard. It always feels like a challenge and like a grind. But if you're devoted to it, you're still working hard and there will be times that you're grinding, but, but you feel like you are just having a current that you're a part of and you're just riding this current through this devotion, through this power as you're being disciplined in what you do. And so if you truly want to be great, you truly want to be your best, you truly want to be a great team, you got to be devoted to each other and to what you're accomplishing together. And individually, if you want to be excellent at what you do, there has to be a devotion to it.
Ed Mylett
It's very good. And the last thing about it I want to go through here, just to tie it all together, is the fifth commitment in the book is connected to, I think, how you become devoted and then heard it said this way before. And when you sent me the book, I said, I think this is my favorite part of the book. And now that I've read it twice, I. I don't know what my favorite part is. There's a lot in it that I really, really like. You know why I say I wasn't that great of a leader? I don't think I was that good at this yet as a friend, I'm great at it. Like, as I got older, I'm very connected to my friends and. But so the commitment, by the way, everybody is the commitment to connect. Just think about all the things in your business or your family, you just kind of do stuff. But are you committed to connecting on a deeper level in your marriage, with your children, with your team, with your business? Like, are you? And then, like, if you are, like, what are you doing about it? What's your plan? What's your strategy? Right. So the commitment to connect as a.
John Gordon
Team, the more connected you are, the more committed you'll be, because you'll never have commitment without connection. And so when there's a connection, there's trust, and there's a bond, there's a relationship, there's love. There's a feeling of oneness, which we talked about previously in our other podcast. So when you have that oneness and connection, you now have power as a team. And. And too often, we're. We're not connected. We're going through life disconnected. Disconnected families, broken relationships, broken marriages. So many teams out there are disengaged and disconnected, and they're in despair, and that's why they're actually suffering and not performing well. So it's simple. I mean, we just have to make the time intentionally to connect. And what I love about this book is I actually gave some really good exercises in the book that you follow this team learning how to connect together. And as they do, you see the impact of that connection. You see the personalities come out as well, which there will always be. Personalities come out, but as the connection happens, you watch this team become stronger, more united and more powerful together. And that will be the same thing if you take the time to intentionally connect as a leader. Here's. Let's make it practical. As a leader, connect with one person that you lead on your team every day in a meaningful way. Just pick one person every day and connect with them. 5, 10 minute conversation, how you doing? Not about business, how you doing? What are you working on? You know, you're struggling with this. How can I help? And have a nice conversation with that team member and connect with them, foster connection amongst your team. See, great leaders don't just connect individually and collectively. They also get their teams to connect. And that's why I wrote this book. It's for a leader to get their team more connected. So as a leader, what are you doing on a daily basis to foster the connection amongst your team members? And so for us, during COVID for instance, we got together once a week and we did team building exercises. We were intentional about it. You can't just allow it to happen. You will drift towards your culture. You won't create your culture unless you actually do it and connect and make it purposeful and intentional. So every week, do a team building exercises. And in the book I wrote about the five Hs, which is my favorite, which is who's your hero? What's a hardship you face that made you who you are today? What's a highlight that you are proud of? What's hilarious? Make it fun. And then what do you hope for as each person goes around and shares their 5H's? I guarantee every team that does this at any level will become a stronger, more united, connected team. What happens is vulnerability paves the way for this connection. The walls of pride and ego come crumbling down. And now you get to know each other. And now you want to fight for each other.
Ed Mylett
Really good, John. The five H's to connect. Thank you for doing this today.
John Gordon
I love them. Thanks for having me, brother.
Ed Mylett
This is really good.
John Gordon
It's fun.
Ed Mylett
Really good. Every time. Isn't it easy when you have a good friend on just. It's a cakewalk, everyone. You're welcome, by the way, because this was good, everybody. If it's good enough for the Washington Redskins, the Clemson Tigers, the Colorado Rockies, you name it, the Los Angeles Rams, it's probably good enough for you, right? Go get the seven commitments of a great team by the great John Gordon. I highly recommend you do that today. God bless you, everybody. Max out. This is the Ed Milan show.
Podcast Summary: The Ed Mylett Show – Episode with John Gordon
Title: Jon Gordon Reveals The Mindset Shift That Builds Winning Teams
Host: Ed Mylett
Guest: John Gordon
Release Date: May 20, 2025
Network: Cumulus Podcast Network
In this compelling episode of The Ed Mylett Show, host Ed Mylett welcomes renowned author and leadership expert, John Gordon, to discuss the pivotal mindset shifts necessary for building and sustaining winning teams. The conversation delves deep into the distinctions between goals and commitments, the essence of positive leadership, and the significance of connection within teams.
Ed Mylett opens the discussion by highlighting a fundamental concept from John Gordon's latest book, The Seven Commitments of a Great Team. He poses a critical question: "Why is commitment greater than goals?" [04:44]
John Gordon responds by emphasizing that while goals provide direction, commitments ensure the consistent action required to achieve those goals. He elaborates:
"If you have goals without commitments, that's a vision without execution. You have to take action to realize it." [05:37]
Key Insights:
Ed shares his personal journey towards physical fitness, underscoring the importance of daily commitments over mere goal-setting. He states:
"It's my day-to-day commitments about when I'm eating, what I'm eating, when I do my cardio, when I do my stretching and lifting. It's the commitments that I'm sort of obsessed with." [08:02]
John Gordon praises Ed's dedication, noting how consistent daily actions lead to significant outcomes:
"Those commitments on a daily basis actually lead to the results that you haven't wanted. I feel better than ever." [08:17]
The conversation seamlessly transitions to the role of faith and spiritual commitments in personal growth. Ed attributes much of his spiritual growth to his relationship with John, highlighting how daily commitments can transform one's faith walk.
John Gordon introduces the concept of prayer walks, illustrating how daily spiritual practices can lead to profound personal and professional insights:
"All my books have come to me during that time. And this book came to me on a walk. I'm walking and praying, and boom, I got seven commitments of a great team." [13:32]
Ed addresses the inevitable challenges leaders face, particularly leadership fatigue—the subtle decline in a leader's energy and effectiveness over time. He warns:
"A leader's job is to carry the emotional burden of the company, of the business, and of the family. If you're the leader of anything, that's the case." [43:00]
John Gordon provides strategies to combat this fatigue:
He emphasizes the importance of passion and staying connected to one's mission:
"Find a mission that wakes you up every day and excites you. It's usually about an impact you can make, a legacy you can leave." [46:10]
A significant portion of the episode centers on positive leadership—leading with positivity without compromising on accountability or expectations.
John Gordon distinguishes positive leaders as demanding yet non-demeaning:
"Positive leaders are demanding, they're just not demeaning. There'll be moments when we need to be demanding, but we can't be demeaning." [22:33]
Key Components of Positive Leadership:
The discussion highlights the critical role of connection in fostering committed and high-performing teams. Ed introduces the concept of the "Five Hs" to enhance team bonding:
John Gordon explains:
"When you have a connection, there's trust, and there's a bond, there's a relationship, there's love... we just have to make the time intentionally to connect." [50:05]
Practical Application:
A standout moment in the episode is the exploration of devotion versus discipline.
John Gordon asserts:
"It's not discipline that actually drives us, it's devotion. When you're devoted to something and you truly love it, discipline is a whole lot easier." [48:05]
He contrasts transactional discipline with intrinsic devotion, emphasizing that true commitment arises from a place of love and passion, making the endeavor feel less like a grind and more like a fulfilling journey.
Ed and John delve into the profound impact of love and sacrifice within teams. Love, in this context, equates to sacrificial commitment, where team members prioritize the team's needs over personal desires.
John Gordon beautifully captures this sentiment:
"Love is about being sacrificial. That's real love... you have to stay in that role... there's going to be a sacrifice to be a great team member and to be a great team." [33:51]
Implications for Team Dynamics:
This episode of The Ed Mylett Show with John Gordon offers a treasure trove of insights into building and sustaining high-performing teams through commitment, positive leadership, and deep connections. Key takeaways include:
Notable Quotes:
For those aspiring to elevate their leadership and team-building skills, this episode provides actionable strategies and profound philosophies that can transform both personal and professional realms.
Recommended Reading:
The Seven Commitments of a Great Team by John Gordon
End of Summary